1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:03,800 It's me, your host Zach Newey Towers, looking sexier than ever 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:07,720 if I do say so myself. I just wanted to let you know 3 00:00:07,720 --> 00:00:10,600 real quick that I am going on tour and I'd love to see you at 4 00:00:10,600 --> 00:00:13,640 a live show. So real quick I'll be in San 5 00:00:13,640 --> 00:00:18,400 Diego, CA May 22nd, Raleigh, NC June 16th, Charlotte, NC, June 6 00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:21,080 17th San Francisco. I'll be at the Punchline all 7 00:00:21,080 --> 00:00:23,640 weekend June 25th, 26th and 27th. 8 00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:27,560 London is August 1st, Philadelphia September 23rd, St. 9 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:31,760 Louis September 24th, Portland, OR in October 15th. 10 00:00:31,840 --> 00:00:36,120 Also, my special is fully out and available to watch for free 11 00:00:36,120 --> 00:00:38,680 on YouTube on the Purse First Studios channel. 12 00:00:38,760 --> 00:00:42,040 It's called Twink Death and I think it's very good. 13 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:46,160 I'd love for you to like, comment, share if you can. 14 00:00:46,360 --> 00:00:56,040 Anyway, enjoy the episode. More give it to me. 15 00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:02,200 Good. Morning Sad Mites. 16 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:13,440 Zach Zoe Towers. Justin Easer. 17 00:01:13,480 --> 00:01:15,760 That's me. Hi, am I on your show right? 18 00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:17,520 Now you're on your show. You're on the show right now. 19 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:22,080 It's very, very calm, cool, chill conversation. 20 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:23,360 Cool. I'm going to put my phone on Do 21 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:24,560 not Disturb. I don't want to. 22 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:27,880 I don't want to be disturbed. So you and I have known each 23 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:31,560 other for technically, like, over a decade. 24 00:01:32,400 --> 00:01:33,520 Yeah. Isn't that crazy? 25 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:36,440 Oh, maybe, maybe not. Maybe just about 10 years it. 26 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:40,280 Would have been 2016. Wow. 27 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:41,720 Yeah. I feel like that date sticks 28 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:42,800 out. It's like, it's always like it 29 00:01:42,800 --> 00:01:45,840 was 2016. Damn, yeah, for lots of reasons, 30 00:01:47,080 --> 00:01:52,080 but you have taken an interesting path in life and how 31 00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:55,200 would you like introduce yourself now 'cause you do. 32 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:59,480 You're a content creator, but in a in a kind of a niche area. 33 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,360 I'm a lot of things. I'm like a content creator, 34 00:02:02,360 --> 00:02:05,440 journalist, news conglomerate owner. 35 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:09,400 So I started, well, I started out in Hollywood, did the whole 36 00:02:09,639 --> 00:02:11,640 that thing. It was fun. 37 00:02:11,640 --> 00:02:15,000 I worked in TV development and then I did America's Got Talent 38 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:17,560 and I started my own YouTube channel called Justin Tech where 39 00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:21,440 I did like all consumer tech. And then during that and during 40 00:02:21,440 --> 00:02:25,720 COVID, I got diagnosed with type 2 diabetes incorrectly. 41 00:02:26,360 --> 00:02:29,440 I actually had type 1 diabetes. And a lot of people don't know 42 00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:31,840 that you can be diagnosed later in life with type one. 43 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:34,440 In fact, and what we used to call juvenile diabetes. 44 00:02:34,680 --> 00:02:39,560 In fact, 60% of diagnosis of type 1 juvenile diabetes are 45 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:42,760 over the age of 20. And I got, I mean, I didn't even 46 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:43,880 say this. I got diagnosed thanks to 47 00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:47,080 TikTok. Oh my God, like someone you you 48 00:02:47,080 --> 00:02:49,880 stumbled upon someone who had the symptoms of that you had. 49 00:02:50,120 --> 00:02:52,720 No, so I was posting videos about like, hey, I'm Justin, I'm 50 00:02:52,720 --> 00:02:55,720 a newly diagnosed diabetic and today we're testing my blood 51 00:02:55,720 --> 00:02:57,160 sugar. And so I was just like in the 52 00:02:57,160 --> 00:02:59,320 same bathroom everyday doing like little things. 53 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:01,480 And I was testing my blood sugar, taking long acting 54 00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:04,400 insulin for the first time. And my doctor was just like you 55 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:07,320 have type 2, we're going to give you metformin. 56 00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:09,520 We're going to. We were going on this journey. 57 00:03:09,520 --> 00:03:12,960 It had been a six month journey of misdiagnosis. 58 00:03:12,960 --> 00:03:15,280 So I was posting these on TikTok and they blew up. 59 00:03:15,720 --> 00:03:19,120 And I just got so many comments from this community I didn't 60 00:03:19,120 --> 00:03:21,880 know existed saying like, no, you have you have type 1 go get 61 00:03:21,880 --> 00:03:24,480 tested, get a pump, get a CGM. And so I did. 62 00:03:24,480 --> 00:03:28,160 And it inspired me to like, keep sharing my story on. 63 00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:32,440 Did you keep? First of all, it's not as simple 64 00:03:32,440 --> 00:03:35,480 as just a test that tells you if it's type one or type 2. 65 00:03:35,680 --> 00:03:38,080 Like how was it misdiagnosed for so long? 66 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:43,080 Well, it the sad part is that it is just a test, but there's so 67 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:46,520 much, there's not enough awareness even in like the 68 00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:49,720 medical field. They spend like one day talking 69 00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:52,120 about type 1 and type 2 diabetes in medical school. 70 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:55,640 So a lot of doctors don't even know that you can be diagnosed 71 00:03:55,640 --> 00:03:58,160 later in age. So my doctor just looked at me. 72 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:00,960 He was like, you're old, you have type 2. 73 00:04:00,960 --> 00:04:03,440 And they'll do that way if you're overweight, you know, if 74 00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:06,640 you're a certain race, like they'll just kind of diagnose 75 00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:07,840 you with type 2. Wow. 76 00:04:08,560 --> 00:04:12,400 Yeah, and you said 60% of people are diagnosed over the age of 77 00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:13,480 2020. Wow. 78 00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:17,800 And is it that symptoms get worse as you get older or? 79 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:21,880 Well, yeah, for me it got bad like very quickly. 80 00:04:21,880 --> 00:04:26,840 OK, the, the signs are always blurred vision, thirsty all the 81 00:04:26,840 --> 00:04:32,160 time, peeing all the time, irritability and general like 82 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:34,520 malaise. And I, I had all of those and, 83 00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:37,320 and that's usually what everyone experiences. 84 00:04:37,320 --> 00:04:40,280 But a lot of times because people go misdiagnosed, they'll 85 00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:43,600 go into what's called DKA, which is diabetic ketoacidosis. 86 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:46,480 And like, they go to the hospital and I mean, it can be 87 00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:49,680 deadly, too. Wow and like comas come into 88 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:52,440 play, right? That's or is that like you go 89 00:04:52,440 --> 00:04:56,240 too low, which is something that I still like it could happen. 90 00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:02,040 That means you need insulin. No, the opposite. 91 00:05:02,040 --> 00:05:03,720 No 'cause that will like kill me. 92 00:05:03,840 --> 00:05:07,280 Wow, I need sugar at that point. Oh my gosh. 93 00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:10,200 Yeah, this important work. What a roller coaster. 94 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:14,720 What a roller coaster. And we'll get to the OK, this is 95 00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:19,160 a sex pod, but obviously feel free to be as candid or whatever 96 00:05:19,160 --> 00:05:23,520 as you want because I do want to know what your sex life has been 97 00:05:23,520 --> 00:05:27,240 like since the diagnosis. But going back to the beginning 98 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:29,640 of your sexual journey, do you remember the first thing that 99 00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:36,520 made you aware of sex? Yeah, at the time I was probably 100 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:40,640 having, I just, I think I just had like these thoughts that 101 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:46,600 like came into my head of like attraction and like night, like 102 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:50,560 dreams I guess were kind of like when I first was thinking about 103 00:05:50,560 --> 00:05:56,920 sex and my dreams included women, only women at first. 104 00:05:57,120 --> 00:05:59,840 You and women. Yeah, and like, I've never told 105 00:05:59,840 --> 00:06:02,360 anyone this, but they were like kind of like sex slave women. 106 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:04,960 Yeah. I don't know. 107 00:06:05,040 --> 00:06:07,520 I, I I'm none of that. Holds true. 108 00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:08,720 Yeah, right. Yeah, it was. 109 00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:11,000 Like weird. That was very short period. 110 00:06:11,040 --> 00:06:16,480 And then I was at my dad's office, I and I was on his 111 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:20,000 computer and I have no idea how I stumbled upon this, but I've, 112 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:27,960 I saw an image of like 2 men together and one was on his 113 00:06:27,960 --> 00:06:31,240 knees, like about to suck the other guy's Dick, I guess. 114 00:06:31,240 --> 00:06:35,440 And I have no idea how I, it was like, it was like, you know how 115 00:06:35,440 --> 00:06:38,240 it used to get pop up. Yeah, yeah, It, it was very much 116 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:41,280 that and not that my dad's computer at his office had like 117 00:06:41,280 --> 00:06:45,200 a virus like that, but it was I, I stumbled on something like 118 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:47,120 that. And that was the first moment 119 00:06:47,400 --> 00:06:52,400 that the idea of gay had ever crossed my mind. 120 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:56,000 At that point I hadn't seen, to my knowledge, I, I hadn't 121 00:06:56,000 --> 00:06:59,400 realized I had seen like Will and Grace or anything like that 122 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:02,080 was the first gay thing. That was the first time I even 123 00:07:02,080 --> 00:07:05,720 knew gay was a possibility. What was your aid, sex and 124 00:07:05,720 --> 00:07:07,840 location at this time? Obviously male. 125 00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:18,640 Lynbrook, NY and I was 12 or 13. I I was in, I had just 7th 126 00:07:18,640 --> 00:07:19,840 grade. Yeah. 127 00:07:20,080 --> 00:07:23,960 What was the vibe? OK, This is when he became aware 128 00:07:23,960 --> 00:07:29,800 of like a boy and boy. So you didn't know anything 129 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,880 about gay culture. Was there a vibe about gay? 130 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:38,840 Was it like spoken poorly of in family, friends, school? 131 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:43,680 I had been called gay all throughout like elementary 132 00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:47,240 school, probably like 5th or 6th grade and. 133 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:50,760 You're like, no, I'm not. I have sex slaves and they're 134 00:07:50,760 --> 00:07:52,520 all women. That is not me. 135 00:07:52,520 --> 00:07:55,000 My phone is on do not serve it's. 136 00:07:55,000 --> 00:07:57,240 Probably my. It's probably my laptop. 137 00:07:58,280 --> 00:08:02,800 I was like, yes, sorry, no, no, you're kid. 138 00:08:03,240 --> 00:08:06,720 That's so funny though 'cause I'm in work mode in my phone. 139 00:08:07,120 --> 00:08:08,400 And so it shouldn't. Have come? 140 00:08:08,400 --> 00:08:09,760 Yeah. That's unprofessional. 141 00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:12,880 I know. Anyway, OK, so you were called 142 00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:15,480 gay. Yeah, I was called gay and it 143 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:19,240 like sucked and like that was like one of the main and it 144 00:08:19,240 --> 00:08:22,160 wasn't, it didn't suck because I it hurt. 145 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:26,240 I was picked on a lot and that was like the go to phrase was 146 00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:30,080 like Justin's gay and the other one was mole, mole, mole, mole. 147 00:08:30,080 --> 00:08:32,480 Because I have a mole here. It's really hard to see and like 148 00:08:32,480 --> 00:08:35,039 forever. I wanted a a beard and I got 149 00:08:35,039 --> 00:08:38,080 one, but I don't care anymore. But yeah. 150 00:08:38,080 --> 00:08:40,520 And so I have a mole here. And Goldmember had just come out 151 00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,480 at that time too. And he like the mole, mole, 152 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,360 mole. Oh no. 153 00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:47,240 It was the worst. Yeah, that's unfortunate timing. 154 00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:49,600 Not cool. I wanted to write a letter to 155 00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:51,560 the producers and be like, you ruined my life. 156 00:08:51,560 --> 00:08:53,880 Like, were you not? Thinking anybody I honestly 157 00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:55,680 that's a class action suit. Anyone. 158 00:08:55,680 --> 00:09:00,000 In the mole we should do it. I mean, you should do it. 159 00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:02,520 I would have never seen it. Isn't that crazy? 160 00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:04,880 Some people are like, oh, your mustache is a little uneven. 161 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:10,720 I'm like, no, it's it's mole do. You remember your first orgasm. 162 00:09:11,600 --> 00:09:15,440 I do. It was actually either the same 163 00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:19,200 day as me seeing that image or like the next day. 164 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:20,200 I think it was the same. Day. 165 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:24,360 That's such a quick turn around. Yeah, so I me and my dad go back 166 00:09:24,360 --> 00:09:27,880 to my home and I like going on a deep dive. 167 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:29,080 I'm like, I want to see more of this. 168 00:09:29,080 --> 00:09:33,840 So I must have used Google. Like man on ease with man. 169 00:09:34,440 --> 00:09:37,400 Pretty, yeah. Like man on man with man kissing 170 00:09:37,680 --> 00:09:42,320 man with man. Like blowing a a penis, I guess. 171 00:09:42,320 --> 00:09:44,320 I don't know, like very blown in. 172 00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:47,440 Penis, I guess. I didn't know what was possible. 173 00:09:48,120 --> 00:09:51,280 Like I didn't know what guy, what I didn't even know what 174 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:53,960 guys or girls would do with sex. All I knew was like I knew. 175 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:56,240 This insertion first. Straight at least yeah, I knew 176 00:09:56,240 --> 00:09:59,760 insertion, so I was just searching that stuff up and I 177 00:09:59,760 --> 00:10:04,240 was seeing images and I was like oh wow, this is like, I'm into 178 00:10:04,240 --> 00:10:06,840 this, this is really cool. Yeah like, well, I hadn't 179 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,760 actually. I hadn't seen anal. 180 00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:13,320 No, I was just seeing like, mostly blow jobs and like, hand 181 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:16,680 jobs, OK. And then my family's like, oh, 182 00:10:16,680 --> 00:10:19,240 we're going to go get froyo. They're like I don't want any. 183 00:10:19,240 --> 00:10:22,920 No, I, I say I'll go. Oh, but they, we were going to 184 00:10:22,920 --> 00:10:25,680 stop at the gap first. OK, brought to you by the gap. 185 00:10:25,840 --> 00:10:28,400 Wow. So we're, we go to the gap, 186 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:30,920 we're in the parking lot and I decide I'm going to stay in the 187 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,920 car. They're going to go into the 188 00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:35,480 gap. And so my family, my mom, my dad 189 00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:38,440 and my sister going to the Gap to go do their little shopping 190 00:10:38,640 --> 00:10:41,280 and I stay in the car and I just start thinking about all this 191 00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:42,840 stuff I was saying. And I was like about your 192 00:10:42,840 --> 00:10:44,480 research. That was cool. 193 00:10:44,480 --> 00:10:46,360 Yeah. And all of a sudden, like, I 194 00:10:46,360 --> 00:10:50,320 have this urge to touch myself for the first time to my 195 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:53,280 knowledge ever, like. And I'm kind of just like doing 196 00:10:53,280 --> 00:10:54,080 that. Yeah. 197 00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:59,520 And I do it long enough in the parking lot of the gap that you 198 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,640 I orgasm. You have my first. 199 00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:02,480 Orgasm. Yeah. 200 00:11:02,560 --> 00:11:07,200 And thank goodness there were tissues on the floor in the back 201 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,200 seat. I freaked out, though. 202 00:11:09,360 --> 00:11:10,840 I didn't know that this could happen. 203 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:13,440 Did you know that that could happen the first time you did 204 00:11:13,440 --> 00:11:14,480 that? Did someone help you or like. 205 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:17,000 No, I read. I read about it in a book, OK. 206 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,440 And I was like, and it was very clinical and it was very like 207 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:23,720 the man can stimulate his genitals by rubbing up and down. 208 00:11:23,720 --> 00:11:26,280 And I was like, it was like a a recipe. 209 00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:28,800 I was like, this can't, is this witchcraft? 210 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:30,800 What's going on? And I like came like a very 211 00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:33,080 watery substance. But I was in the comfort of my 212 00:11:33,080 --> 00:11:35,920 like bedroom. Who's letting their kids 213 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:39,200 discover this on their own? Like, should we not be like, 214 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:43,560 just so you know, like one day, heads up, yes, I freaked out. 215 00:11:43,560 --> 00:11:47,080 I it felt amazing. It was, I mean, it hasn't felt 216 00:11:47,080 --> 00:11:49,000 as good since, right? Like it's never going to. 217 00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:50,680 Feel. Wait, that's so funny. 218 00:11:50,680 --> 00:11:52,840 Yeah, I mean, it was the most incredible thing I'd ever 219 00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:55,720 experienced in the. World and it really does stand 220 00:11:55,720 --> 00:11:57,880 out to you as the best orgasm you've ever had. 221 00:11:58,520 --> 00:11:59,840 I think so. I mean it. 222 00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:01,800 I mean it was holding up for 13 years. 223 00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:05,200 Yeah, so cleaned it up with the tissues. 224 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:08,160 My family, I timed it out. Like, my family's coming toward 225 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:10,360 the car and freaking out. I open the door as they come in 226 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:13,240 and I drop the tissues out of the door and close it and we go 227 00:12:13,240 --> 00:12:14,880 get froyo. And my mom mentioned she's like, 228 00:12:15,560 --> 00:12:17,600 there's a weird smell in here or something. 229 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:20,440 Yeah, it was my semen. Oh my. 230 00:12:20,480 --> 00:12:24,560 Gosh, I think I got like pomegranate yogurt froyo. 231 00:12:25,840 --> 00:12:28,480 Wait, wait, wait. Have you ever come clean about 232 00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:30,400 that to your family? No, never will. 233 00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:32,720 They are not listening to this and if they are, I'm so. 234 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:34,520 Sorry, maybe they are. Maybe. 235 00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:37,600 They are. OK, wow, OK. 236 00:12:37,600 --> 00:12:39,560 Do you remember your first sexual experience with another 237 00:12:39,560 --> 00:12:42,560 person? Yeah. 238 00:12:42,840 --> 00:12:44,040 OK. It wasn't. 239 00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:44,800 Great. OK. 240 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:48,000 Yeah, I could tell that actually from the way you said, yeah. 241 00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:51,400 I was taking advantage of it, OK, It felt like that. 242 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:53,720 Sure. It's a, it's a, it's a lot of 243 00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:58,000 people's experience, I've found. Yeah, well, we do not have to 244 00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,800 talk about that. If it's like, oh, I. 245 00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:03,040 I talk about it, OK, I'm actually, I've never, it's 246 00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:03,720 funny. I like. 247 00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:05,800 I haven't really talked about any of this with anyone. 248 00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:09,520 So I know, and that's honestly the underlying mission statement 249 00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:14,040 of this podcast is like to be make sex more conversational and 250 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:18,520 make it not so scary or shameful or like 'cause we, it's like you 251 00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,880 just said with the parents, like not giving their kids a heads 252 00:13:20,880 --> 00:13:23,400 up. It's like you also know what it 253 00:13:23,400 --> 00:13:25,920 felt like, knew what it felt like to be in the dark about 254 00:13:25,920 --> 00:13:31,080 this and stumble upon it and be very scared and ashamed maybe so 255 00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,440 wouldn't you want to be like, I'm not going to do that to my 256 00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:35,160 kid? Here's APDF. 257 00:13:35,560 --> 00:13:39,720 Give it a read like about what may happen with your body. 258 00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:42,560 I'm gonna give them VR, they're gonna wear a headset. 259 00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:44,480 They're gonna be like going through. 260 00:13:44,480 --> 00:13:46,040 They're gonna go through the veins of the penis. 261 00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:47,520 They're gonna see how the semen works. 262 00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:49,280 It's gonna end everything, end at a gap. 263 00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:53,440 Yeah, yeah. I'll get the Gap to sponsor. 264 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:55,600 That yes, perfect. I'm a content creator. 265 00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:59,200 So then, yeah, talk us through then how this first experience 266 00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:00,520 came to be and how it played out. 267 00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:06,160 So the first person I ever told I was gay was this guy MJ. 268 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:08,480 Thank you MJ for like helping me come out. 269 00:14:08,920 --> 00:14:11,840 It was his ex that I started talking to like. 270 00:14:11,840 --> 00:14:16,920 And again, what age are we at? 6/15/16. 271 00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:18,600 And we all went to the same school. 272 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:22,040 Me and MJ went to the same school, that's How I Met him. 273 00:14:22,040 --> 00:14:26,360 He introduced me to his ex BJM. J and BJ. 274 00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:27,880 Yeah, yeah. Wow. 275 00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:32,200 So I, BJ and I are talking on like AOL Instant messenger or 276 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:33,400 something. Used to be such a thrill. 277 00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:38,000 See the boy come online and be like, is he going to message me? 278 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,480 Yeah. Yeah, Oh my God, those are the 279 00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:40,240 days. Those are the. 280 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:43,720 Days, did you dabble in xy.com? Did you? 281 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:45,680 It was like, wait. It was that a gay. 282 00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:49,080 Website, yeah, it was like, I think so for like young guys, 283 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:52,520 very it was like very like teen gay website. 284 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,400 I remember it. I don't remember being too 285 00:14:55,400 --> 00:14:57,680 involved. I was part of like, the GYC. 286 00:14:57,680 --> 00:15:01,160 The gay youth community was like a website I was on. 287 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:04,200 Yeah, like back in the day, like we had to find these like the 288 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:05,960 Adam. Well, there was gay.com. 289 00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,240 That I chat room. Oh, really? 290 00:15:08,240 --> 00:15:11,320 And Adam for Adam Manhunt. Manhunt. 291 00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:12,800 Yeah. Anyway, OK, sorry. 292 00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:16,000 So you were chatting with BJ and at this point did you think BJ 293 00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:17,600 was cute? Were you like OK? 294 00:15:17,640 --> 00:15:22,040 Definitely thought he was cute and him and I had just been 295 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:26,160 talking for a while. There was flirtation there and 296 00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:29,720 we decided to meet up. I don't think, I don't think. 297 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,400 I couldn't even drive. I didn't have a car. 298 00:15:31,400 --> 00:15:34,280 He had to come pick me up. Was he significantly older? 299 00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:38,480 He was 18. OK, so does that mean it was 300 00:15:38,480 --> 00:15:41,800 illegal? I'm sure there's like yes, 301 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:46,640 'cause it or there's like a separation of like 16 to 18 302 00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:50,680 because I feel. Like that should be fine. 303 00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:55,040 I mean it, I guess it there is probably a hard and fast law. 304 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:59,040 Obviously I err on the side of it being illegal, but. 305 00:15:59,880 --> 00:16:02,280 Yeah, don't try this at home. But like, honestly, but like, 306 00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:05,160 seniors have dated freshmen. Do you know what I mean? 307 00:16:05,520 --> 00:16:08,400 And that's about that gap 1518. Yeah. 308 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:12,360 Anyway, OK, proceed. So he picks me up and the whole 309 00:16:12,360 --> 00:16:15,040 I think like the plan was to have sex. 310 00:16:15,040 --> 00:16:20,520 Like that was the plan. I think I just hadn't had it and 311 00:16:20,520 --> 00:16:25,000 he knew I hadn't had it before. And so that was the plan. 312 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:27,880 And so he picks me up. We go back to his house. 313 00:16:27,880 --> 00:16:31,280 His mom is on vacation. So we have like the place to 314 00:16:31,280 --> 00:16:35,400 ourselves. And I didn't know what to 315 00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:37,120 expect. I mean, my, I thought we were 316 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:40,200 going to like have more of a moment. 317 00:16:40,200 --> 00:16:42,800 Like I don't know I I wanted it to be more of a date or to. 318 00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:45,840 Like. Have chemistry and make out. 319 00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:48,280 Yeah, that was kind of my expectation, but it was kind of 320 00:16:48,280 --> 00:16:51,440 weird we got there. He like, he's like, oh, let's 321 00:16:51,480 --> 00:16:53,600 watch porn. So like we he like, turns on 322 00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:54,880 porn to watch. I'm like, OK. 323 00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:59,400 And then he's like, all right, like, let's get undressed and 324 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:02,640 like we just get undressed separately. 325 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:04,760 No, he doesn't take my clothes off. 326 00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:06,599 It's like you take off your clothes. 327 00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:10,839 No. Damn, I don't think we kissed at 328 00:17:10,839 --> 00:17:12,520 all. Damn. 329 00:17:12,520 --> 00:17:14,160 Which was really heartbreaking for me. 330 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:17,800 I sucked a Dick before I kissed a boy, so this is not the same 331 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:25,200 thing, but it's like, yeah. Yeah, so I think we just like I 332 00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:31,960 get on top of him and we don't kiss and and we like have sex. 333 00:17:32,360 --> 00:17:34,200 I think that that was it. Like I don't even remember a 334 00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:37,920 blowjob being involved. It was very it was so sterile. 335 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:39,920 Yeah. And it was like, and I don't 336 00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:44,200 remember. I think I topped really. 337 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:47,320 Yeah. Yeah, that first time. 338 00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:52,440 Wow, that's interesting. The second time I bottomed OK, 339 00:17:52,840 --> 00:17:54,000 yeah. Was it with BJ? 340 00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:56,320 Yeah. And was it the same day? 341 00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:59,760 No, it was another day, but it was in a car. 342 00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:03,560 And did you ever kiss? I think I got to kiss a little 343 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:05,640 bit, like I made sure of it. Like I was like, we're going to 344 00:18:05,640 --> 00:18:08,160 kiss this time. Yeah, that's so interesting 345 00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:10,960 'cause you also think like, I mean, that's so to me 346 00:18:10,960 --> 00:18:16,080 disconnected gay guy in his like twenties, 30s, where it's like, 347 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:20,760 no, I'm just, you think it'd be more like, yeah, kissing, 348 00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:27,440 grinding, HJBBJ it. Felt so transactional. 349 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:30,560 It was like we are doing this just to have sex. 350 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:36,320 It was and the reason I say I felt taken advantage of it just 351 00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:40,920 I don't know, I. Well, he knew what he was doing 352 00:18:41,120 --> 00:18:42,600 and you didn't know what you were doing. 353 00:18:42,760 --> 00:18:48,520 So it was like definitely like misplaced trust and confidence 354 00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:52,840 in, in an, an elder, you know, and if you it, all that really 355 00:18:52,840 --> 00:18:55,720 matters is that you felt it was not kosher. 356 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:59,840 And that's a huge bummer. And it took time for me to, 357 00:18:59,840 --> 00:19:02,760 like, digest that. At first, I was like, well, 358 00:19:02,760 --> 00:19:05,840 maybe this is how it's done. Of course, you didn't know. 359 00:19:06,360 --> 00:19:07,440 Yeah. And a few years later I was 360 00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:11,360 like, that was kind of weird. So did you so after you bottomed 361 00:19:11,360 --> 00:19:16,400 in the car, Bottoming in cars with boys after you got them in 362 00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:19,320 the car was at the end of you in beach. 363 00:19:20,840 --> 00:19:22,560 I think there were a couple more times. 364 00:19:23,400 --> 00:19:25,360 I think they were all car related too. 365 00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:28,040 I I actually like cars were. A thing. 366 00:19:28,760 --> 00:19:30,720 When you. When you don't have a place. 367 00:19:30,760 --> 00:19:33,960 When you're gay and you're not out and you don't feel 368 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:37,400 comfortable bringing home a guy, like 'cause who's the guy? 369 00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:40,480 Maybe if they're your friend from school, but if it's just 370 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:43,560 some random guy, I don't know, I, I just never, I didn't feel 371 00:19:43,560 --> 00:19:47,200 comfortable bringing guys home. And even if I did bring them 372 00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:49,800 home, it's like, why are you in your room? 373 00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:51,680 You know why? And it why is it the? 374 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:54,480 Door No, you don't have to explain how like difficult anal 375 00:19:54,480 --> 00:19:56,960 would be in your childhood bedroom. 376 00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:01,120 Yeah, so cars were the the spot for a while. 377 00:20:01,840 --> 00:20:04,440 Did you? Do you have a fondness for them? 378 00:20:05,360 --> 00:20:08,600 Do you hook up in cars now? No, but I want to, you know, 379 00:20:09,800 --> 00:20:12,520 like I see it on the apps where people are like car playing. 380 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:16,200 That would be fun. Yeah, see, I see it's not as fun 381 00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,200 as. No, no, no, no. 382 00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:21,440 And you're like trying to get comfortable trying to get into a 383 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:25,360 position 'cause I know like I'm also of the generation where 384 00:20:25,360 --> 00:20:29,360 like road head was like a thing. Like people at least talked 385 00:20:29,360 --> 00:20:31,240 about it a lot. Like, oh, I'm driving, she's 386 00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:34,680 sucking my Dick. It's like, it's hard to do that. 387 00:20:35,040 --> 00:20:38,640 Like it's hard because they're kind of at like a decline. 388 00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:41,640 And like, then you're like trying to get their pants and 389 00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:45,040 they're driving like it's a, it's a real to do. 390 00:20:45,840 --> 00:20:49,240 Yeah, I've only, I've done that once and I think I was just the 391 00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:51,480 provider. You blue? 392 00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:52,360 Yeah. Nice. 393 00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:55,760 Yeah, he may have blown a red light or something, but 394 00:20:56,760 --> 00:20:59,280 everything. I heard it. 395 00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:01,400 Yeah. I want to check my blood sugar 396 00:21:01,400 --> 00:21:02,360 real quick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. 397 00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:06,520 This is a low in the. That's live. 398 00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,480 Oh yeah, no, I I mean, I'll. Potentially. 399 00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:11,160 Unless you pass out and then I'll be like. 400 00:21:11,360 --> 00:21:13,000 Oh then that would be really good TV. 401 00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:17,440 Let's see. OK, I'm just going to have a 402 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,960 couple gummies just in case. And I'll also by all means keep 403 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:22,680 your monitor near you. Yeah, I don't. 404 00:21:22,760 --> 00:21:26,280 I didn't realize it wasn't. It would have sounded, but 405 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:32,200 sometimes like you just know. Yeah, I knew, my body said every 406 00:21:32,200 --> 00:21:34,400 bottom right before he shat on someone. 407 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,760 Diabetes is all about listening to your body. 408 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:39,240 Wow. Yeah. 409 00:21:39,240 --> 00:21:42,680 My friend Jacob, who is diabetic, Yeah. 410 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:45,440 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's every time we hang out, 411 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:49,600 he's injecting himself. He's using meat, he's still 412 00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,240 using a pen. He's not using a pump or 413 00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:52,160 anything. No. 414 00:21:53,080 --> 00:21:56,880 Interesting he. That's interesting. 415 00:21:57,280 --> 00:21:58,880 Do you think that's a good nostalgia thing? 416 00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:01,440 I think that people have a hold up. 417 00:22:02,960 --> 00:22:07,680 I think there's a couple things there is comfortability with 418 00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:12,200 wearing something both personally and also externally 419 00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:14,760 like other people. I don't he probably, I'm sure 420 00:22:14,760 --> 00:22:17,040 he's like well established and like feeling confident in 421 00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:18,440 himself. So probably not that. 422 00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:22,760 But there's also the I have great results, why would I 423 00:22:22,760 --> 00:22:25,800 change it? But what a lot of people who are 424 00:22:25,800 --> 00:22:29,960 using pens don't realize is just how many extra decisions and 425 00:22:30,360 --> 00:22:33,480 mental distress that they have because they manage like that. 426 00:22:33,480 --> 00:22:36,440 That would go away with a pump and that's in. 427 00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:40,400 Fatigue, but it's like. Decision between yeah, people 428 00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,640 with diabetes, they say make like 180 more decisions, micro 429 00:22:43,640 --> 00:22:47,120 decisions a day about like diet, like I wake up is my blood sugar 430 00:22:47,120 --> 00:22:49,000 high? I, I, I start breakfast. 431 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:50,680 OK, I have to give myself blood sugar now. 432 00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:53,600 Oh, I have a meeting at 11:00. Well, I don't want to go low. 433 00:22:53,600 --> 00:22:57,600 Oh, I'm going on a podcast. I don't want to go low for that, 434 00:22:57,600 --> 00:22:59,760 so I'm not going to eat. Oh, I need to get my gummies. 435 00:22:59,840 --> 00:23:01,680 Oh my PD Ms. over there Let me get. 436 00:23:01,760 --> 00:23:04,200 It what am I going to do? Like that's right. 437 00:23:04,200 --> 00:23:06,640 So it's a it adds up to like 180 decisions. 438 00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:08,840 And then it's like you go on a hike and you forget the gummies 439 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:11,240 in the car and you're like, can I get back down? 440 00:23:11,560 --> 00:23:14,320 I've had some, yeah. There's like scary situations 441 00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:18,120 that have come up that are. Damn, well I'm not jealous. 442 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:20,560 Good. Yeah, I am. 443 00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:25,240 I I'm also like proud and thankful that I could like, turn 444 00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:27,240 it around. Well, beyond struggling with 445 00:23:27,240 --> 00:23:32,000 like a mystery ailment, like being in the solution must feel 446 00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,800 very good, and like learning more must feel good. 447 00:23:36,520 --> 00:23:40,880 I'm very thankful that I've been able to take my diabetes and 448 00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:44,480 turn it around and use it for, to help people because it gives 449 00:23:44,480 --> 00:23:47,120 me a sense of purpose. It gives me a sense of like, OK, 450 00:23:47,120 --> 00:23:50,360 This is why I have diabetes. If I didn't have that going, I 451 00:23:50,360 --> 00:23:52,800 think I'd be a lot more like, depressed about it. 452 00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:54,360 Yeah. Because it'd be one more thing 453 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:58,800 to to fucking survive in this country, much less the world. 454 00:23:58,880 --> 00:24:01,920 Now it's a bit of an identity and, yeah, passion. 455 00:24:02,080 --> 00:24:02,800 That's great. Yeah. 456 00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,760 Community. Like you said, people come up to 457 00:24:04,960 --> 00:24:07,120 you like, Oh my God, I love your stuff. 458 00:24:07,320 --> 00:24:10,200 We actually, before we forget, plug where they can, where Tower 459 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:14,040 Bottoms can find you. They can find me at Diabetech, 460 00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:20,280 DIABE, Tech TECH anywhere. Like every platform, I have a 461 00:24:20,280 --> 00:24:24,520 podcast, The Diabetic Podcast, but I do a lot of fun stuff on 462 00:24:24,520 --> 00:24:27,640 social media that people even without diabetes. 463 00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:30,680 Can enjoy comes across their desk Yeah, yeah. 464 00:24:30,680 --> 00:24:35,800 So you are fucking in cars fucking or at least sucking in 465 00:24:35,800 --> 00:24:39,720 cars. And this is still high school. 466 00:24:41,240 --> 00:24:44,800 Yeah. And then so beyond MJ and BJ, 467 00:24:45,440 --> 00:24:49,160 what was it like finding were you out at this point? 468 00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:54,600 I came out during National Coming Out Day like it really 469 00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:56,080 does something. That's so it's. 470 00:24:56,080 --> 00:24:58,320 Really incredible. So National coming out Day, I 471 00:24:58,320 --> 00:25:01,200 believe was a Friday. Almost came out to my grandma in 472 00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:03,800 the car that day, but I didn't. But then the next day, that 473 00:25:03,800 --> 00:25:06,800 Saturday, I came out to my mom and then my mom like couldn't 474 00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:07,920 hold it. She was like, we're telling your 475 00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:09,760 dad. Oh, oh, oh, in a good way. 476 00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:14,280 Not like, not in a good or bad way. 477 00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:19,000 They had to know. So yeah, you'd think they had to 478 00:25:19,000 --> 00:25:25,360 know 'cause but like my mom, I think my dad had an inkling or 479 00:25:25,360 --> 00:25:28,240 like, thought it was possible my mom was just like, ignorant to 480 00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:30,120 it or oblivious to it. Yeah. 481 00:25:30,680 --> 00:25:34,120 And do they have a negative? So or. 482 00:25:34,120 --> 00:25:37,000 Concerned. Concern. 483 00:25:37,120 --> 00:25:41,480 This is a phase. I remember a moment where my mom 484 00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:44,560 kind of almost like broke down with me and like was like kind 485 00:25:44,560 --> 00:25:48,320 of made it about her of like, I and I, you know, wanted to have 486 00:25:48,320 --> 00:25:50,600 grandchildren, all this stuff and like, just. 487 00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:54,520 But like, it wasn't it. It was a lot, but it it wasn't 488 00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:57,720 like, you suck like it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 489 00:25:57,720 --> 00:25:59,760 Like. She was just seeing the negative 490 00:25:59,760 --> 00:26:02,880 things that might come with. Yeah, the situation. 491 00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:07,560 And then years later I'll find out from my sister that my mom 492 00:26:07,560 --> 00:26:10,840 actually started seeing a therapist or a psychologist 493 00:26:10,840 --> 00:26:11,960 something. After you came out. 494 00:26:12,040 --> 00:26:14,640 Yeah, because she knew that the problem was with her and not 495 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:16,320 with me. And my mom's never told me that. 496 00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:17,920 My mom doesn't even know I know that. 497 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:21,200 I hope your mom never stumbles upon this podcast. 498 00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:22,200 I know, right? It's. 499 00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,240 Beautiful. Like, I know that's so stunning. 500 00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,000 I love that she did that and my dad was like, my dad knew gay 501 00:26:27,000 --> 00:26:28,360 people. My dad was super chill about. 502 00:26:28,360 --> 00:26:31,040 It great, yeah, Your dad also had a gay pop up on his 503 00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:35,120 computer, so maybe your dad dabbled in a little bisexuality. 504 00:26:35,120 --> 00:26:38,720 Yeah, no, no, but I do. I could. 505 00:26:38,760 --> 00:26:42,280 I wouldn't be surprised if that was like he was watching. 506 00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:44,480 I know he was watching porn on his computer at work. 507 00:26:45,440 --> 00:26:48,000 OK, so this is high school. You've come out on coming out 508 00:26:48,000 --> 00:26:49,680 day. Are there any other gay people 509 00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:51,840 in your high school besides MJ in you? 510 00:26:52,360 --> 00:26:56,320 So MJ graduates and I am the only out person in my in my high 511 00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:57,880 school and I'm out at that point. 512 00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:01,720 So at that point, once he leaves and he was two years older, I 513 00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:04,400 was the only person out. OK. 514 00:27:04,680 --> 00:27:06,960 And was that OK? You know what? 515 00:27:06,960 --> 00:27:10,360 It was pretty OK. Like no one middle elementary 516 00:27:10,360 --> 00:27:12,240 school. Middle school made fun of a lot. 517 00:27:12,240 --> 00:27:16,480 Yeah, high school never made fun of to my face. 518 00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,720 Oh, great. And maybe, maybe I don't even 519 00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:20,760 know. If that's all you can really 520 00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:22,240 ask. For I don't, right? 521 00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:23,440 Exactly. I don't care if you're saying 522 00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:24,960 shit behind my back. My back. 523 00:27:25,000 --> 00:27:28,600 If anything, you're scared to say it to me, so back on. 524 00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:30,600 I was confident. I mean, I think that there, I 525 00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:34,240 actually think that there was a sense of respect that was gained 526 00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:36,160 that people were like, wow. Good for him. 527 00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:39,360 Damn yeah out and proud. I mean something I. 528 00:27:39,360 --> 00:27:44,720 Actually was like I started the OR there was AGS, actually there 529 00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:47,080 was AGSA, but I was, I became the president of the. 530 00:27:47,360 --> 00:27:49,440 I started mine, but as a straight person. 531 00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:52,920 And then I like had a soft coming out when I was 16, 532 00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:55,480 officially coming out freshman year in college. 533 00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:58,520 But I was like, obviously gay. I like did musicals and like 534 00:27:58,640 --> 00:28:01,000 ballet and stuff. And I was like, I just want to 535 00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:04,000 be a good ally, you know? You're an ally ally girl. 536 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:08,560 OK, So are you on line? Are you horny? 537 00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:12,640 And are you looking for gay stuff? 538 00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:16,520 I'm like semi horny. I'm like 50% horny right now. 539 00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:17,600 It goes. Oh, right now. 540 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:21,560 Back then, but I'm glad. I mean, I was going to ask you 541 00:28:21,560 --> 00:28:23,000 now. Anyway, yeah, I am actually. 542 00:28:23,000 --> 00:28:25,160 Can you turn off the camera? I'm like super horny right now. 543 00:28:26,360 --> 00:28:28,080 OK this. No, we're keeping the camera on. 544 00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:29,800 Honestly, I need. So this isn't the new We're 545 00:28:29,800 --> 00:28:33,280 talking high school, yeah. You're the only gay person. 546 00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:34,240 OK. And are you like? 547 00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:37,600 And and like there's a drought, OK, right. 548 00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:40,960 Because there's no one your your pool is gone. 549 00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:44,080 Yeah. So are you looking though like 550 00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:48,760 on the? Adam was probably the go to. 551 00:28:49,080 --> 00:28:51,400 And did you, do you remember any, are there any highlights or 552 00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:53,120 low lights from this period of time? 553 00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:59,520 There were so a few nice little moments, like dates with random 554 00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:03,400 guys that didn't really go anywhere, but just nice moments. 555 00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:08,040 And then there were a lot of older men that I did things 556 00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:10,400 with. I think I just was like really 557 00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:13,840 into that when I was younger. And actually that I didn't even 558 00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:15,640 like. That was kind of that first, 559 00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:17,280 those first visuals I was looking at. 560 00:29:17,640 --> 00:29:21,040 I was really into like much older men with much younger men. 561 00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:23,760 Daddy Boy. Yeah, yeah, that was like what I 562 00:29:23,760 --> 00:29:26,200 was into. I'm not into that anymore, but 563 00:29:26,200 --> 00:29:28,640 that was what I liked, I guess, because I was the boy and I 564 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:32,160 wanted the man. Do you think you'll be Daddy at 565 00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:35,840 some point? I don't want to be. 566 00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:37,560 Forever boy. OK, you know that's that's the 567 00:29:37,560 --> 00:29:38,520 answer then. Yeah. 568 00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:41,480 And I'm not looking for daddies. I'm right now I'm more so like 569 00:29:41,480 --> 00:29:45,640 looking for just like a regular. Yeah, like a yeah, like a venti 570 00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:48,160 Grande. I don't know. 571 00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:51,920 OK. So OK, OK, then we go to 572 00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:54,280 college. I go to college. 573 00:29:55,320 --> 00:29:57,120 Well, I was, so I went to Emerson College. 574 00:29:57,160 --> 00:29:59,720 Oh, is that here? It's in Boston, and it's like, 575 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:01,040 well, yes. There's a campus here. 576 00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:02,680 There is a. Beautiful building on. 577 00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:03,680 Sunday. And they do a lot of, like, 578 00:30:03,800 --> 00:30:05,560 journalism. Yeah, OK. 579 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:10,440 And it is one of the gayest schools in the country, OK. 580 00:30:10,520 --> 00:30:13,200 Yeah, so did you have a lot of gay stuff happen so. 581 00:30:13,600 --> 00:30:19,680 No, I mostly had straight friends, which was weird because 582 00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:23,360 I, I, I moved in. I had five straight roommates, 583 00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:25,400 which is crazy. Because this living situation. 584 00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:26,880 This was the yeah, and it was amazing. 585 00:30:26,880 --> 00:30:29,240 But this was the type of school where they were ganned. 586 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:31,120 Unless proven straight, that was. 587 00:30:31,120 --> 00:30:34,280 Nice, yeah. Which was a great place to be, 588 00:30:34,280 --> 00:30:37,920 but I only had these straight roommates and then I then all of 589 00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:41,280 their like girlfriends or girlfriends that were on our 590 00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:44,080 floor. So I mostly was friends with 591 00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:47,840 straight people at Emerson. It just worked. 592 00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:51,040 I think I didn't really feel like I related with a lot of the 593 00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:54,800 gays at the school at the time, and so it wasn't actually until 594 00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,640 after college that I had my first gay friend. 595 00:30:58,520 --> 00:31:01,160 Wow. I had lesbian friends, but my 596 00:31:01,160 --> 00:31:02,960 first, yeah, my first like guy, gay friend. 597 00:31:03,080 --> 00:31:06,960 That's really impressive that you avoided that college. 598 00:31:06,960 --> 00:31:09,760 Gay college is when I met some of my best gay guy friends. 599 00:31:10,240 --> 00:31:14,360 Yeah, I don't know what it was. I mean, I guess I just. 600 00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:17,640 Then were you hooking up with guys who weren't on campus but 601 00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:22,000 in the surrounding area? Yeah, it was a it's a school 602 00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:26,240 town, so I was having sex with, yeah, people from every school. 603 00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:27,320 Basically. I had a list. 604 00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:30,040 Disdain for gay guys your age at school. 605 00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:34,080 I think there was something about the Emerson students, a 606 00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:36,080 lot of them. And I mean, The thing is, I'm a 607 00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:38,360 theatre guy. Yeah, theatre gay. 608 00:31:38,360 --> 00:31:45,320 But maybe there was a pretentious vibe to a lot of the 609 00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:49,200 the gay guys at this school that I felt that just wasn't. 610 00:31:49,640 --> 00:31:54,160 Doing it for you and also we are coming from the origin story of 611 00:31:54,160 --> 00:31:58,880 you daddy boy, where like these guys all look like boys to you 612 00:31:58,880 --> 00:32:00,400 and you're like what? Get away. 613 00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:06,000 Yeah, I I was still, I still did like older men, more mature. 614 00:32:06,000 --> 00:32:10,000 I liked more mature guys, sure. Yeah. 615 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:13,240 OK, so college happens. Where do you go after college 616 00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:15,840 here? I come here, so I Emerson 617 00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:18,040 brought me out here through an internship program. 618 00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:20,760 Cool. And then what? 619 00:32:20,760 --> 00:32:22,560 What you made your first gay friend. 620 00:32:23,000 --> 00:32:24,800 So my first gay friend was also my boyfriend. 621 00:32:26,960 --> 00:32:29,120 I'm wondering if it. And he was also 16 years older 622 00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:32,760 than me. OK, did it start as a friendship 623 00:32:32,760 --> 00:32:35,440 or did it start start? Yeah, we work together. 624 00:32:36,520 --> 00:32:38,600 But you were interning. He was like employees. 625 00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,080 PA Yeah, I was production assistant. 626 00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:43,640 He was a video editor at the. OK, that's cute. 627 00:32:43,960 --> 00:32:44,880 That's cute. Yeah. 628 00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:46,760 That's like a, that's like a quiet guy. 629 00:32:46,760 --> 00:32:48,880 And I would he was a quiet guy. Yeah. 630 00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:51,000 And I would like go around to all the offices and be like, 631 00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:52,360 what do you want for lunch today? 632 00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:56,440 And maybe like. And I love, I love going to his 633 00:32:56,440 --> 00:32:57,840 office. And then I would hang out a 634 00:32:57,840 --> 00:32:59,200 little bit. And this was like when we were 635 00:32:59,200 --> 00:33:01,520 just kind of like getting to know each other, but I would 636 00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:07,320 already hang around. So he kind of, it was, he's kind 637 00:33:07,320 --> 00:33:10,080 of, he was kind of oblivious to it. 638 00:33:11,280 --> 00:33:12,840 I actually. On the spectrum? 639 00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:14,280 A little bit, no. Maybe. 640 00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:16,680 A little, honestly, maybe a little bit. 641 00:33:16,680 --> 00:33:18,520 Yeah. Yeah, I do. 642 00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:19,560 Yeah. Yeah. 643 00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:23,840 He's, he's got like ADHD. He's definitely like spicy. 644 00:33:23,920 --> 00:33:25,440 Yeah. Well, The thing is too, it's 645 00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:31,040 like he's 16 years older, so he shouldn't be oblivious to a 646 00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:35,200 young guy laying it on. Do you know what I mean? 647 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:36,480 I wouldn't. Think so? 648 00:33:36,480 --> 00:33:39,920 Well, I had to. I had to make like the first 649 00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:42,000 move. And how did that manifest? 650 00:33:42,040 --> 00:33:44,840 Well, so we're just friends at this point. 651 00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:47,680 I'm obsessed with him. I I just thought he was so cool, 652 00:33:47,920 --> 00:33:50,640 like he was just so interesting. He had this beautiful four story 653 00:33:50,640 --> 00:33:54,920 loft in downtown Los Angeles. Did you know there's a there's a 654 00:33:55,040 --> 00:33:58,080 Pershing perching Pershing Square, Pershing Square. 655 00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:01,480 It's on Pershing square. There's perch that there's a 656 00:34:01,480 --> 00:34:03,200 restaurant perch. It was across the street. 657 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:07,360 This he had. Four stories. 658 00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:09,159 Yeah, between him and a roommate. 659 00:34:09,600 --> 00:34:13,320 And it was huge, lofty, like the top bedroom was all brick but 660 00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:14,600 looked like you were in a cathedral. 661 00:34:14,920 --> 00:34:16,400 I've been to a party at this place. 662 00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:19,040 You've been to his. Place I've been to it was it was 663 00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:21,760 like an outdoor patio thing that wrapped around you went to his 664 00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:25,080 party with like gargoyle, like not gargoyles, but like you felt 665 00:34:25,080 --> 00:34:27,840 like you were on the top of like a hunchback of Notre Dame sort 666 00:34:27,840 --> 00:34:30,040 of yes so. When was the party so? 667 00:34:30,040 --> 00:34:31,199 That was his party. Funny. 668 00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:32,199 I may have been at that. Party. 669 00:34:32,199 --> 00:34:35,840 I mean at least at least 10 years ago. 670 00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:37,199 Yep, Yep. So that was it. 671 00:34:37,239 --> 00:34:38,760 'Cause I was still drinking. Yeah. 672 00:34:38,800 --> 00:34:40,239 Do you remember who threw that party? 673 00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:42,480 No, OK, that was I never knew where I was. 674 00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:45,840 I was just, I was at places. Do you remember the occasion? 675 00:34:46,000 --> 00:34:51,320 No. No, OK, so that what like I was 676 00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:54,800 like just like. Yeah, yeah, like. 677 00:34:54,880 --> 00:34:58,640 His life, him, he was so cool. He like had this like he was an 678 00:34:58,640 --> 00:35:03,520 adult and established. And so we're just friends and 679 00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:06,800 but we're like, we wound up hanging out and then we wound up 680 00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:08,880 hanging out this entire day together. 681 00:35:08,920 --> 00:35:10,840 Well, that's pretty. Huge though to hang out with 682 00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:15,120 someone from work, right? Like you're APA, He's a video 683 00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:17,480 editor. Like how did it like hanging out 684 00:35:17,480 --> 00:35:18,880 to be? Fair. 685 00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:22,880 Like he was a freelancer there, so he would come and go. 686 00:35:22,920 --> 00:35:25,360 That wasn't like a bad time. So he'd be there for like a 687 00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:26,840 month and then leave for a month. 688 00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:33,320 So there was this sense of like, he's not a full on Co employee 689 00:35:34,720 --> 00:35:36,760 and he wasn't necessarily my boss. 690 00:35:37,760 --> 00:35:40,480 Great. He would, he was like above me 691 00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:43,240 on the ladder and I would, I would do tasks for him. 692 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:48,360 Yeah, exactly. So that night, we, we go by 693 00:35:48,360 --> 00:35:50,480 speaker, we go to Best Buy and buy these speakers. 694 00:35:50,480 --> 00:35:52,960 He wanted these like $3000 beautiful speakers. 695 00:35:52,960 --> 00:35:55,920 We take them back to his place and his friend calls him and is 696 00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:59,240 like, he's like, oh, you should come over with your partner. 697 00:35:59,240 --> 00:36:03,800 Like, let's have a Molly night. And at that point, I guess I had 698 00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:06,080 done Molly in college a little bit, but I was like, I was like, 699 00:36:06,320 --> 00:36:07,400 oh, yeah. And so we do. 700 00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:11,640 We have a Molly night and we're just like singing Wicked with 701 00:36:11,640 --> 00:36:13,360 these new speakers. He has lights. 702 00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:15,160 Do you remember his lights? He's at his place. 703 00:36:15,160 --> 00:36:15,760 Yeah. OK. 704 00:36:15,760 --> 00:36:20,680 He has beautiful lights all around that were moving like he 705 00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:22,280 knew how to throw a throw a party. 706 00:36:22,720 --> 00:36:25,720 And there was this moment where we were rolling. 707 00:36:26,240 --> 00:36:31,000 And there's also a hot tub. Do you remember the hot tub? 708 00:36:31,960 --> 00:36:34,640 An Infinity hot tub. Navy. 709 00:36:34,640 --> 00:36:38,920 It was the neighbour's Infinity hot tub, but no one lived in 710 00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:42,920 that that unit. And he somehow figured out how 711 00:36:42,920 --> 00:36:47,000 to Jerry rig that Infinity hot tub and get it to work. 712 00:36:48,120 --> 00:36:52,480 And so he he would use it all the time and, and somehow the 713 00:36:52,480 --> 00:36:54,640 building never saw the electric bill going up or something. 714 00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:57,120 That's crazy. So we're getting geared up to go 715 00:36:57,120 --> 00:37:00,880 into the hot tub and like, he's like, he's like, it's him and I 716 00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:02,840 in the kitchen. He's like, yeah, like this guy, 717 00:37:02,840 --> 00:37:04,240 blah, blah. He's talking about this guy that 718 00:37:04,240 --> 00:37:06,000 like isn't showing him attention. 719 00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,000 And I say to him, I'm 22 years old. 720 00:37:08,160 --> 00:37:12,680 This man is 37 years old or 36. And I say to him, I'm like, do 721 00:37:12,680 --> 00:37:14,480 you not even notice what's right in front of you? 722 00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:19,160 And that was the moment. And then you guys kiss. 723 00:37:19,240 --> 00:37:22,360 Yeah, wait. But what's he really does sound 724 00:37:22,360 --> 00:37:24,400 oblivious, totally oblivious. Wait. 725 00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:28,440 But also, that's so bold of you. I mean, maybe that's the 22 year 726 00:37:28,440 --> 00:37:31,880 old's gift. If I if a guy was talking to me 727 00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:35,040 about a guy he likes not liking him back, I'm like, well, 728 00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:39,280 obviously he doesn't like me because I am right here. 729 00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:42,440 And like, wouldn't you take this as your opportunity? 730 00:37:43,200 --> 00:37:45,200 But. I think he was speaking like 731 00:37:46,280 --> 00:37:50,240 very conscientious of my age and just respect. 732 00:37:50,240 --> 00:37:52,320 You're just like, you're not a thing. 733 00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:54,040 Yeah, like he's like, yeah, it's not even. 734 00:37:54,040 --> 00:37:55,960 It's not going to happen. Like this isn't what he wants 735 00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:56,840 kind of thing. I don't know. 736 00:37:57,680 --> 00:37:59,520 It seemed respectful. That's great. 737 00:37:59,800 --> 00:38:02,040 So he was pleasantly surprised. Yeah. 738 00:38:02,120 --> 00:38:04,200 So you're like, do you not even see what's right in front of 739 00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:05,240 you? And then you kiss him. 740 00:38:05,840 --> 00:38:10,280 Yeah, it was like mutual, Yeah. That I mean this is the problem 741 00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:14,520 though with Molly because like talk about first time orgasms. 742 00:38:14,680 --> 00:38:19,240 How do you even compete with the brain chemistry shit going on 743 00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:24,320 when you kiss your crush while rolling and about to get into a 744 00:38:24,320 --> 00:38:27,800 hot tub? Like it's too many positive 745 00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,640 things. It was incredible, Yeah. 746 00:38:30,320 --> 00:38:33,800 That night was one of the best nights of, you know, it's 747 00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:35,160 definitely a marker in my life. Like. 748 00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:38,160 We're not dating anymore, but like that was just a beautiful. 749 00:38:38,960 --> 00:38:40,200 Did you have full sex that night? 750 00:38:41,560 --> 00:38:44,680 No, OK, I don't think I could. Did you see each other's 751 00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,800 wieners? Yeah, yeah. 752 00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:50,640 Did you guys fool around with the friends that were there? 753 00:38:51,520 --> 00:38:53,640 No, they were very much doing their thing. 754 00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:55,400 We were doing our thing in that hot tub. 755 00:38:56,320 --> 00:39:00,440 Yeah, it was. I mean, and we're in an Infinity 756 00:39:00,440 --> 00:39:03,800 hot tub overlooking all of downtown Los Angeles and 757 00:39:03,800 --> 00:39:04,520 Pershing Square. I. 758 00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:06,760 Remember those views? 22 years old. 759 00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:09,760 This is cool. When I was there too, I was 760 00:39:09,760 --> 00:39:13,320 like, this is unreal. This is unreal. 761 00:39:14,240 --> 00:39:17,200 It felt, yeah, very yeah, magical. 762 00:39:17,360 --> 00:39:19,000 Very LA. How long did you date? 763 00:39:19,240 --> 00:39:21,760 Here we dated for a year and a half. 764 00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:26,480 This long time. I knew halfway through that I 765 00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:30,960 was probably not gonna. I just was so obsessed with him 766 00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:34,760 and I, I looked at him like as this like he was a mentor. 767 00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:37,920 He really was my mentor. He started teaching me like more 768 00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:41,360 about video editing and got me. I would work for him like and do 769 00:39:41,360 --> 00:39:43,880 photo shoots. He had like a whole photo while 770 00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,200 dating while dating. So it was like this work 771 00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:49,040 relationship and this mentor relationship like, and I was 772 00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:52,680 looking at him as like this, just like this idol, this older 773 00:39:52,680 --> 00:39:58,600 brother, this, this, this, this very God gay father that I never 774 00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:01,160 had in my life. He's also like Daddy Junior. 775 00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:03,360 Yeah. He's like, not full Daddy, but 776 00:40:03,360 --> 00:40:06,080 he's definitely a mature guy. Yeah. 777 00:40:06,080 --> 00:40:09,800 Maturer then, yeah. And so halfway through I was 778 00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:13,120 like, I think I'm just like really obsessed with him and 779 00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:16,760 love him being in my life, but I don't in the sex wasn't there. 780 00:40:18,160 --> 00:40:21,000 But I let that go for a while 'cause I was like so excited and 781 00:40:21,000 --> 00:40:23,000 I wanted a boyfriend. He was my first boyfriend, my 782 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,480 first at 22 years old, my first long term boyfriend, my first 783 00:40:26,680 --> 00:40:28,160 yeah boyfriend. Wow. 784 00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:33,840 Was the sex just not there in a mechanic's sort of way, or a 785 00:40:33,840 --> 00:40:38,760 desire versus interest? Or was it just like? 786 00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:41,520 Mechanic's worth thing, OK, definitely. 787 00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:47,280 And I think that as time went on, I was, it was more like, I 788 00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:52,240 find him so cute, then I find him so godly, godly attractive 789 00:40:52,680 --> 00:40:54,600 it you know. Yeah, you. 790 00:40:54,720 --> 00:40:58,840 Yeah, You adore him. You don't wanna, like, do crazy 791 00:40:58,840 --> 00:41:02,920 things with him. OK, So this happens. 792 00:41:02,920 --> 00:41:05,120 You're still young when this relationship ends. 793 00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,440 What's the longest relationship you've been in? 794 00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:08,840 That one. That one. 795 00:41:08,840 --> 00:41:10,960 OK. And do you feel a certain way 796 00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:19,720 about that? I have dated around and OK, let 797 00:41:19,720 --> 00:41:21,640 me start from the top of that. No, that's right. 798 00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:26,760 I think, do I feel a certain way about that? 799 00:41:30,240 --> 00:41:34,440 I've wanted a a long term partner since then at moments of 800 00:41:34,440 --> 00:41:36,840 my life, like it's got I've got it in and out of like I want to 801 00:41:36,840 --> 00:41:38,680 be single. I want a partner, I want to be 802 00:41:38,680 --> 00:41:44,960 single. So yeah, like I, I'm, I feel 803 00:41:44,960 --> 00:41:48,280 very ready right now to be in a long term relationship. 804 00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:51,920 I don't feel like I'm, and I don't feel like I'm 805 00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:55,120 inexperienced. Like I've had enough four 806 00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:59,120 months, six months, two months to really get an understanding 807 00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:01,760 of what I'm looking for and what I'm not looking for. 808 00:42:01,760 --> 00:42:05,040 And I at this point, I'm not gonna just be in a relationship. 809 00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:07,320 To be in a relationship. I know exactly what I'm looking 810 00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:08,480 for. Obviously it's not gonna be you 811 00:42:08,480 --> 00:42:12,120 know, I just know what the red flags that there that exist for 812 00:42:12,120 --> 00:42:15,160 me and and who's right, So I don't waste, I just don't waste 813 00:42:15,160 --> 00:42:17,800 my time with things that I know aren't gonna. 814 00:42:17,800 --> 00:42:20,520 And sometimes it's a know it when you see it type thing. 815 00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:25,360 Wait, do you want to like in a manifesty sort of way, tell us 816 00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:30,880 like what the guy is like? What what the long term guy is 817 00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:32,440 like? Like what are his attributes? 818 00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:34,560 Oh my God, if you get me a boyfriend out of this, I owe 819 00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:38,160 you. Like coffee breakfast like. 820 00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:40,920 Oh, your boyfriend's worth coffee breakfast. 821 00:42:41,280 --> 00:42:43,600 How about a car? How about a + 1 to the wedding? 822 00:42:43,600 --> 00:42:47,440 OK, yeah, no ring bearer. Yeah, like, I mean. 823 00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:48,760 Like we've been dressing as a dog. 824 00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:50,160 Yeah. And I'm gonna and I'm gonna walk 825 00:42:50,160 --> 00:42:52,680 down with it tied to my. OK deal. 826 00:42:53,360 --> 00:42:55,280 If you're out there, you know this is legally binding this. 827 00:42:55,280 --> 00:42:57,840 Is what I'm looking for. OK, you know the first two 828 00:42:57,840 --> 00:43:02,880 things that always come to mind? First two maybe it's one is 829 00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:08,520 passion for something it could be pickleball and it can be your 830 00:43:08,520 --> 00:43:13,400 career it can be art just like you are passionate about 831 00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:17,320 something it lights you up yeah. And drive, I guess drive goes 832 00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:20,080 with that like you're driven and you're. 833 00:43:20,080 --> 00:43:22,920 Participating in life. Yeah, yeah. 834 00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,960 So I'd say, like, those are a couple characteristics that 835 00:43:25,960 --> 00:43:29,960 really stick out to me and you need to make me laugh. 836 00:43:29,960 --> 00:43:31,960 I can't be the one that's always making us laugh. 837 00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:34,520 Like it's always the worst when you get back from a date. 838 00:43:34,520 --> 00:43:36,400 You're like, we laughed so much. Wait a second. 839 00:43:36,840 --> 00:43:38,640 We. Laughed 'cause I was the funny 840 00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:40,880 one. No, it needs to be like 841 00:43:41,320 --> 00:43:43,240 somewhere around 5050. Sure. 842 00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:45,720 Yeah. So they need to be funny. 843 00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:52,440 And then all of the people I've dated have been bossy bottoms, 844 00:43:52,440 --> 00:43:56,160 blonde, blue eyed, balding, not saying that. 845 00:43:56,160 --> 00:43:57,640 All those things. Yeah, yeah. 846 00:43:57,640 --> 00:44:04,240 The, the, the five BS, balding, balding, bottom blonde, blonde. 847 00:44:04,480 --> 00:44:06,320 Yeah. The balding one really throw 848 00:44:06,400 --> 00:44:08,720 throws throws me. They just all have a receding 849 00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:12,480 and they're like receding hairline, OK, balding and you 850 00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:15,360 like that. No, it's just consistency. 851 00:44:16,240 --> 00:44:18,160 I'm consistent. I know what I like. 852 00:44:18,160 --> 00:44:21,720 That's just like I I always have ended up with people in with the 853 00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:26,080 with the five BS. And you like, OK, OK, so some 854 00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:29,080 part of you must like the bossy bottom of it all. 855 00:44:29,240 --> 00:44:31,680 I'm a bossy bottom, I'm a bossy verse bottom. 856 00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:36,440 And I do like I do need the person in my relationship to be 857 00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:41,040 like affirmative in lots of ways, including sex. 858 00:44:41,040 --> 00:44:46,440 And then they just happen to all all be like bottom oriented like 859 00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:48,760 verse bottoms. So you have no problem dating 860 00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:51,840 another bottom. I don't think I could date a 861 00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:53,320 bottom. I believe I could date a verse 862 00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:55,840 bottom and up. OK up to top. 863 00:44:56,200 --> 00:44:58,320 Verse top I don't think I really. 864 00:44:58,480 --> 00:45:00,680 A full top. Yeah, it's just too much work. 865 00:45:01,000 --> 00:45:05,600 Oh sure, always being an empty booty hole, no. 866 00:45:06,080 --> 00:45:09,640 I don't got time for that. Is OK, so a lot of people are in 867 00:45:09,640 --> 00:45:13,520 their side eras. Are you still firmly in anal 868 00:45:13,520 --> 00:45:16,760 land or? That's good to know. 869 00:45:16,760 --> 00:45:21,920 No, I I love a side moment. Like, not like having to have 870 00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:23,880 anal. Yeah, that's that sounds great, 871 00:45:24,040 --> 00:45:26,000 right? I love all the other things. 872 00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:32,120 Cuddling, cooking dinner, kissing, hugging, massage me. 873 00:45:36,040 --> 00:45:39,400 No massage. You already said you're a bossy 874 00:45:39,400 --> 00:45:41,680 bottom. I'm a bossy verse bottom. 875 00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:44,640 How does OK, how does that manifest though? 876 00:45:44,640 --> 00:45:47,720 Is it like I'm? Yeah. 877 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:51,360 I just like if I'm riding the Dick. 878 00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:54,360 Let me write it. More often than not, I like to 879 00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:57,600 take control and I, I think it's like giving up. 880 00:45:57,920 --> 00:46:00,720 I, I will give up control, but like I just, yeah, I like, yeah, 881 00:46:00,840 --> 00:46:03,600 it's exactly that. Like I like to be on top and at 882 00:46:03,600 --> 00:46:06,320 least in the beginning and be like I'm controlling the 883 00:46:06,320 --> 00:46:08,680 situation. OK, a power bottom. 884 00:46:10,800 --> 00:46:13,200 I don't know if I'm a power bottom though, like I don't 885 00:46:13,200 --> 00:46:16,680 know, like I can't go for hours. I don't want power. 886 00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:20,920 Bottom is like he's like using the tops like. 887 00:46:21,600 --> 00:46:22,600 Dick. Yeah, I'll do. 888 00:46:22,920 --> 00:46:24,880 I'll do that. No, but I like to be connected 889 00:46:24,880 --> 00:46:26,680 during that. So like my legs will still stay 890 00:46:26,680 --> 00:46:29,320 connected to them, OK. You know, like I want to be as 891 00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:31,360 close to you as possible. While I'm doing that, wait, do 892 00:46:31,360 --> 00:46:34,400 you have a favorite? Is a missionary your favorite? 893 00:46:34,960 --> 00:46:36,240 Is that what that's called? Yeah, well, no. 894 00:46:36,240 --> 00:46:40,440 Missionary is like he's between your legs and your face to face. 895 00:46:40,760 --> 00:46:42,920 I like looking at you. Yeah, Yeah. 896 00:46:43,000 --> 00:46:47,240 So either that or riding it them laying on their back. 897 00:46:47,240 --> 00:46:49,800 Yeah, I like don't know the names of things. 898 00:46:50,280 --> 00:46:54,440 Cowgirl that I like cowgirl. Reverse cowgirl is your back 899 00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:57,840 would be to the top. I actually not opposed to that 900 00:46:57,840 --> 00:46:59,320 if I could turn around and still kiss you. 901 00:47:00,400 --> 00:47:03,360 Here's a hack. If, if, Oh my God, it'd be like, 902 00:47:03,360 --> 00:47:07,880 actually me sitting on this couch and you seated with your 903 00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:11,720 back on my chest and then like, you're like, back-to-back and 904 00:47:11,720 --> 00:47:14,480 like, the kissing is like happening over the shoulder. 905 00:47:14,840 --> 00:47:16,480 Yeah. Yeah, I'm into that. 906 00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:23,560 Yeah, OK, So you're, you have experience with the the five BS, 907 00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:27,880 but you're open to brunettes. Oh, absolutely. 908 00:47:27,880 --> 00:47:28,280 OK. It's. 909 00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:30,880 Just yeah, it's just happened. Always landed but. 910 00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:36,760 Interesting. OK, so we're nearing the end 911 00:47:36,760 --> 00:47:39,760 here. Let's play a quick round of Hot 912 00:47:39,760 --> 00:47:42,680 or Not I list things. Oh, actually wait, we we can end 913 00:47:42,680 --> 00:47:46,400 with this. Actually, how has being type 1 914 00:47:46,400 --> 00:47:55,080 diabetic affected your sex life? So the good news is that oh, OK, 915 00:47:55,880 --> 00:47:59,440 it had let me think about how it's affected my my sex life. 916 00:48:05,330 --> 00:48:08,570 I know I feel it's. Definitely made it's definitely 917 00:48:08,570 --> 00:48:13,090 made sex more. I don't really think about the 918 00:48:13,090 --> 00:48:17,200 diabetes It's but it, but things will come up where I'm like 919 00:48:17,200 --> 00:48:19,520 having sex with someone and all of a sudden I hear like an 920 00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:20,400 alarm. Yeah. 921 00:48:20,560 --> 00:48:23,360 And I'm going low. And when you're low, you get 922 00:48:23,360 --> 00:48:27,200 dizzy, you get anxious, paranoid, sweaty. 923 00:48:28,120 --> 00:48:32,600 So like that will happen. I'm just like I do. 924 00:48:32,640 --> 00:48:36,440 I think I do a pretty good job of choosing the people that I do 925 00:48:36,440 --> 00:48:39,800 sleep with now, even if it's just like a grinder hookup, kind 926 00:48:39,800 --> 00:48:43,920 of gauging that everyone's really been supportive in that 927 00:48:43,960 --> 00:48:47,000 and not annoyed or freaked out. I also think I'm a pretty good 928 00:48:47,800 --> 00:48:51,240 communicator of like I'm having a low like this is my pump. 929 00:48:51,240 --> 00:48:53,440 This is my CGMI mean I just need some sugar. 930 00:48:53,480 --> 00:48:55,560 Let's just like sit around then we can talk a little bit or 931 00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:59,440 something. So it, it, I mean, it does add a 932 00:48:59,440 --> 00:49:02,080 little bit of complications. I mean, I also like there have 933 00:49:02,080 --> 00:49:05,760 been times where I'm having sex and like my pump rips off. 934 00:49:06,240 --> 00:49:09,160 Is that painful? Not, not too bad. 935 00:49:09,520 --> 00:49:12,960 It's not. It's not that bad, but it does 936 00:49:12,960 --> 00:49:17,040 add, it adds vulnerability instantly to the situation, 937 00:49:17,200 --> 00:49:21,920 which I'm not always trying to like do that right away, you 938 00:49:21,920 --> 00:49:24,360 know, or trying to keep the moment going. 939 00:49:24,360 --> 00:49:26,920 And it can sometimes be like, you go from like this hot sex to 940 00:49:26,920 --> 00:49:28,840 like, oh, I'm vulnerable right now. 941 00:49:28,840 --> 00:49:31,960 I actually need you to be the supportive person and not like a 942 00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:38,880 sexy demon, whatever, you know. So I'll occasionally like, yeah, 943 00:49:38,880 --> 00:49:41,400 I'll have to take breaks with people and I, I do my best. 944 00:49:41,400 --> 00:49:45,080 I have to think about sex before and not just the booty hole, but 945 00:49:45,080 --> 00:49:48,360 like I have to think about what did I eat before? 946 00:49:48,440 --> 00:49:51,520 How much insulin is on board? Maybe I have some extra snacks 947 00:49:51,520 --> 00:49:53,400 now. Do I put on activity feature 948 00:49:53,400 --> 00:49:55,960 which like sends my glucose a little higher? 949 00:49:55,960 --> 00:49:58,600 Just to be so funny. 'Cause it's a workout and 950 00:49:58,920 --> 00:50:02,560 working out raises your insulin sensitivity, which then means 951 00:50:02,560 --> 00:50:04,840 that the insulin works better, which means it will drop your 952 00:50:04,840 --> 00:50:06,920 glucose down, which means you could go low. 953 00:50:07,640 --> 00:50:12,040 Wow, that is a lot of mathematics, like quick math. 954 00:50:12,480 --> 00:50:16,000 Yeah, but I also think it's, I also think that people find it 955 00:50:16,000 --> 00:50:19,600 hot that I am taking care of myself with this technology, 956 00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:22,640 that I'm so educated by it. They like being taught it. 957 00:50:22,640 --> 00:50:25,000 Like when I'm on the dance floor and I'm like, and someone like 958 00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:26,840 is starting to grind on me, I take their hand. 959 00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:29,440 I put it on my pump. I'm like, that's my pump, That's 960 00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:32,400 my CGM, you know? This is my handle. 961 00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:37,120 This is when I get all low low sugar. 962 00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:41,560 Yeah, and it's, you know, I try to make it fun and educational 963 00:50:41,560 --> 00:50:45,920 and not take the sexiness out of the vibe, I guess. 964 00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:47,560 Keep it, keep it light, keep it fun. 965 00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:51,280 OK, so then yeah, let's play a quick round of Hot or not and 966 00:50:51,280 --> 00:50:53,960 then we'll wrap things up. This is I list things and you 967 00:50:53,960 --> 00:50:55,880 tell us if you find them hot or not. 968 00:50:56,400 --> 00:51:00,320 OK so threesomes and or group sex? 969 00:51:04,320 --> 00:51:07,200 Oh, I only have two options. I mean you can explain. 970 00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:13,680 I think they're hot, but like, I do not do it ever really. 971 00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:15,880 Oh, so you're you're a one-on-one guy? 972 00:51:17,240 --> 00:51:18,280 At least at first. I'd. 973 00:51:18,280 --> 00:51:19,280 I'd prefer that. Yeah. 974 00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:20,880 Like, I'm not like an orgy person really. 975 00:51:20,880 --> 00:51:23,080 I mean, although I'd be down. OK, wait. 976 00:51:23,080 --> 00:51:24,960 I've never invited. Like, no one invites me. 977 00:51:26,040 --> 00:51:29,160 Like you invite me to an orgy. OK, you have to pick you and the 978 00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:34,400 love of your life or an orgy. OK, OK, absolutely wait. 979 00:51:34,400 --> 00:51:37,960 And then so it sounds like actually you wouldn't ever need 980 00:51:37,960 --> 00:51:39,840 to go to an orgy or have a threesome. 981 00:51:39,840 --> 00:51:43,880 If you have like your dude that you really like cute. 982 00:51:45,440 --> 00:51:49,800 Let's see rough sex or sex that could like leave a mark. 983 00:51:51,520 --> 00:51:55,080 Not right hair pulling or pulling hair. 984 00:51:56,160 --> 00:51:58,920 Not pulling, but grabbing. OK. 985 00:51:59,440 --> 00:52:00,600 A firm touch. Firm. 986 00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:04,480 Yeah, like take it and hold it and don't let me go or vice 987 00:52:04,480 --> 00:52:10,360 versa. Don't let go, Jack Oral. 988 00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:16,720 Hot. Which is more hot to you, rim 989 00:52:16,720 --> 00:52:21,000 jobs or blowjobs? Is this giving or receiving? 990 00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:23,120 Yeah, you can give a different answer for both. 991 00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:28,720 OK, so blowjobs, it's hotter for me to give. 992 00:52:29,080 --> 00:52:32,200 Give. Rim jobs hotter for me to 993 00:52:32,200 --> 00:52:33,120 receive. OK. 994 00:52:33,160 --> 00:52:35,720 True bottom, Yeah. True bottom, yeah. 995 00:52:37,480 --> 00:52:40,760 Yeah, like I don't want to. Like I'll fuck it, but I don't. 996 00:52:40,760 --> 00:52:43,120 You don't need it. Only if, like, we know each 997 00:52:43,120 --> 00:52:47,200 other really well and, like, you showered and I'm really in you 998 00:52:47,200 --> 00:52:50,400 and you're my partner for life. Like, yeah. 999 00:52:50,720 --> 00:52:53,120 There's so many, so much in the fine. 1000 00:52:53,120 --> 00:52:55,400 Print. Yeah, but I'm not like craving 1001 00:52:55,400 --> 00:52:58,000 it. Sure, nipple play. 1002 00:52:59,320 --> 00:53:03,680 I you can you can lightly touch it with your fingers or your 1003 00:53:03,680 --> 00:53:05,120 mouth, but please. Don't, don't bite. 1004 00:53:05,160 --> 00:53:07,080 Pull or bite or. Are they sensitive? 1005 00:53:07,880 --> 00:53:09,440 I guess so, yeah. They must be. 1006 00:53:09,440 --> 00:53:19,000 Yeah, balls. Neither hot nor not. 1007 00:53:19,000 --> 00:53:21,080 OK, just I'm indifferent about balls. 1008 00:53:21,080 --> 00:53:23,920 They're there, they hit you in the face, which is nice, but 1009 00:53:23,920 --> 00:53:26,360 like I'm not trying to like I'm not like outwardly like trying 1010 00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:27,520 to suck them. I. 1011 00:53:28,280 --> 00:53:32,520 I in my older age I've grown into liking balls already. 1012 00:53:32,520 --> 00:53:35,720 Like, notice when they're nice. I'll have to start looking at 1013 00:53:35,720 --> 00:53:37,880 the balls more and I'll let you know like if I can. 1014 00:53:37,880 --> 00:53:41,120 You got to give him a rundown like like he's a dog competing 1015 00:53:41,120 --> 00:53:43,840 for best in show, you know, like cup the balls and be like. 1016 00:53:44,280 --> 00:53:47,080 I did help someone get diagnosed with prostate cancer once. 1017 00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:48,840 Yeah. I've actually saved 3 lives. 1018 00:53:48,840 --> 00:53:50,120 But we'll, that's another podcast. 1019 00:53:50,160 --> 00:53:51,080 Wow. Yeah. 1020 00:53:51,200 --> 00:53:52,640 Yeah. So he, like, owes me. 1021 00:53:52,840 --> 00:53:55,000 Yeah. He also gave him an STD. 1022 00:53:56,240 --> 00:53:58,440 He was more grateful. Yeah. 1023 00:53:58,440 --> 00:54:00,600 Yeah, obviously. OK. 1024 00:54:00,600 --> 00:54:03,560 And the last thing is, what is a piece of advice you give to your 1025 00:54:03,560 --> 00:54:06,400 younger self before he began his sexual journey? 1026 00:54:16,080 --> 00:54:19,040 I mean, confidence is key. I think that that's confidence 1027 00:54:19,040 --> 00:54:24,200 is the most sexy thing there is. It's the biggest turn on and I 1028 00:54:24,200 --> 00:54:27,000 think when that clicked for me on an Atlantis cruise when I was 1029 00:54:27,000 --> 00:54:29,600 23 years old, my entire life changed. 1030 00:54:29,880 --> 00:54:32,240 Wow. Yeah, Amen. 1031 00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:34,400 Amen. Way Amen. 1032 00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:36,600 Thank you so much for doing this. 1033 00:54:36,600 --> 00:54:38,600 Where can the Tower Bottoms find love and support you? 1034 00:54:39,160 --> 00:54:44,640 It's called Diabetech DIABE under score TECH on all socials. 1035 00:54:44,640 --> 00:54:48,200 I'm also Justin Tech, Justin under Score Tech, where I talk 1036 00:54:48,200 --> 00:54:51,440 more about like technology and stuff, but my diabetes stuff is 1037 00:54:51,440 --> 00:54:54,520 real fun and funny. Yay, go check Justin out. 1038 00:54:54,520 --> 00:54:56,480 Also watch the YouTube. He's a cutie patootie. 1039 00:54:57,000 --> 00:54:59,680 And until next time, keep sucking and fucking. 1040 00:55:02,640 --> 00:55:05,600 Hello Tower bottoms. It's me, your host Zach Newry 1041 00:55:05,600 --> 00:55:07,440 Towers. Thank you so much for listening 1042 00:55:07,440 --> 00:55:10,240 to good side pod. If you haven't already, give it 1043 00:55:10,240 --> 00:55:13,440 a five star rating, leave a review, share it with a friend, 1044 00:55:13,440 --> 00:55:15,440 get the word out. I love you so much. 1045 00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:18,240 And until next time, keep sucking and bucking.