Hi, I'm Diane Groussel and I'm also known as Silver
Disobedience. And today the topic for this
podcast is how do you decide what's most important to you?
We all get so many opportunities with people, work situations,
things we might want. How do we decide what's most
important to each of us individually?
To start this topic, I want to start off with the fact that
some things really do matter. Things like illness and death,
well, those are really big matters.
Having an income matters, and it's very stressful when money
seems to be going and flowing in the wrong direction.
But other than these kind of things, nothing else really
matters. And again, before we get into
deciding how to determine what you think is important, let's
just keep going in the topic of what's not important.
What you neglected to say yesterday, or what you did say,
How you acted or didn't? What you wore.
That expression on someone else's face.
That prize, That job. That comment, whether you wore
makeup or no makeup. Bad hair days.
No hair days. That parking spot that somebody
just took. The rude person who didn't let
you in when you were driving or hold the door.
Stepping in. Dog poop.
Pigeon poop in your hair That happens to me.
Coughing without covering your mouth.
Cold callers when you run to the phone.
Poor customer service. Slow Internet connections.
Annoying people shouting into their phones.
Celebrity dramas. People reading over your
shoulder when you're riding on the bus or train.
Sycophants. Complainers stepping on chewing
gum. Feeling bloated.
Extra 5 lbs. Delays in traffic.
Late trains. Airline cancellations.
People who don't answer your calls.
Junk mail. Broken dishwashers.
Unflushed toilets. Politicians.
Paper cuts. Bad parkers.
Acronym text messages that need a dictionary to try to figure
out what the heck the person's trying to tell us.
Long waits of traffic lights. Slow closing doors, uncut lawns.
Grocery store lines when you only need one thing.
Christmas lights in March. Weathermen who are right only
50% of the time. The speed police, Burnt toast,
pimples and wrinkles at the same time?
Well, that all doesn't matter. As long as you're healthy and
alive, that's what matters. So how can you really decide
what does truly matter to you? After all, what matters is a
deeply personal and introspective process.
Here are some steps that might help you on this self discovery
journey. One reflection.
If you want to figure out what's important to you, you have to
take some time for introspection and self reflection.
I do this by just setting aside some quiet moments where you can
contemplate thoughts, emotions, and experiences.
This way you can consider your values, your beliefs, and also
take a good look at your aspirations and how real they
are to you and how much you're willing to work for them.
What brings you joy and fulfillment?
What makes you feel alive and purposeful?
Step 2 gets down to prioritizing.
If you want to know what matters to you most, make a list of the
things, the people, and the activity that currently occupy
your time and attention. Evaluate each of them, every
single item on the list, and then assess its significance in
your life. Consider the impact each thing
on your list has on your well-being, your personal
growth, and your long term goals.
Identify the items that align with your values and have a
positive influence on your life. So for example, if I was looking
at a list and I said, well, I spend this much time watching
television and hardly any time seeing friends, I might want to
look at that list and say, how can I reprioritize?
Because when you look at your day and we all only get 24
hours, no matter how much it seems that other people get so
much more done in a day, and they do because they prioritize.
The number three would be to really think about
experimenting. Engage in a variety of
experiences so you can explore different areas of interest.
One of the ways you can you need to to to determine things that
are important to you and where your priorities are.
You have to have tested a lot of different things.
You might think something you know that you like reading, but
maybe you've never tried drawing or dancing or playing.
Pickleball is you try new things.
You will find your uncovering hidden passions and discover
aspects of yourself that you might not have even been aware
of. By experimenting, risking trying
new things, you'll gain new insight into what resonates with
you on a much deeper level. #4 is you really have to clarify
your core values. To clarify, core values means
you spend time reflecting on the principles and ideals that guide
your life. What principles do you consider
non negotiable? Like for example a good night's
sleep to me is non negotiable. I will cut out things to make
sure I get a good night's sleep. What principles do you consider
non negotiable? What values do you hold dear?
Is it important for you to go to you?
You know you're a House of worship once a week, or is that
not important? Only you can discover what your
values are and prioritize them. And identifying your core
values? Well, that helps you develop a
solid foundation for the decision making that you'll want
to do to align your actions with what truly matters for you 5 is
assessing your relationships. You really want to evaluate your
relationships and the people in your life.
You want to consider the impact they have on your well-being in
your personal growth. You want to surround yourself
with people who support and inspire you and those who share
your values and inspirations. And when you think about
prioritizing in the relationships in your life, I
want to just give you a thought to consider.
A lot of people get involved in relationships that become
marriages and they stop prioritizing each other.
And that is often a reflection that people make on their
deathbeds. They say I wish I told the
person I was with that I love them more, that I spent more
time with them, that I let them know they were important to me.
So prioritizing the people in your life and really thinking
about who you want to spend most time with is an important thing
to do. That will help you determine
what is most important to you and how you decide to spend your
time. Number six would be to embrace
your authenticity. To do this, you really have to
be true to yourself, and that includes resisting the pressure
to conform to societal expectations or others, people's
definition of what matters. Only you can embrace your
authentic self, and I really hate the word authentic.
It's so overused. But only you can embrace what's
really important to you, and you will know it's important when
you find your focus goes in that direction of what genuinely
resonates with you rather than chasing external validation or
approval. So when something's important to
you, you're not worried about who approves of it.
You just do it and you make time for it.
Seven is re evaluate how you're spending your time regularly.
You know you have to remember that your priorities are your
priorities, and what matters to you may revolve may evolve over
time. Life is dynamic.
It's always changing. There's always things going on,
and it's important to periodically assess what your
values and principles are so you can ensure they align with
whatever self you are evolving. Ultimately, discovering what
truly matters to you is an ongoing process.
It's personal and it takes work. It requires self reflection,
introspection and a willingness to constantly explore and
experiment. You have to be real patient with
yourself and trust the time and a self-awareness.
Through those you will gain clarity about what holds genuine
significance in your life. And like I said at the beginning
of this, with that whole long list of annoying things, they
don't matter. They're passing fleeting
moments. What matters is what you decide
is important to you and what you hold on to.
Hold dear to and commit to doing regularly, often whenever you
can, for the greatest fulfillment in your life.
I'm Diane Grisel. I'm also known as Silver
Disobedience. I hope you subscribe to this
channel. If you like my content and you
can learn more on my website, dianegrisel.com.
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Thanks a lot for joining me. Please subscribe.