1
00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:04,100
Hey there, I'm Diane Grisel. 
And I'm here today with 

2
00:00:04,100 --> 00:00:08,500
Charlotte ribbon and this is the
silver to speed Ian's podcast. 

3
00:00:08,500 --> 00:00:10,800
Let me just start off by saying,
silver Disobedience. 

4
00:00:10,800 --> 00:00:15,600
Has nothing to do with age. 
I want to really clarify that. 

5
00:00:16,100 --> 00:00:21,300
It's about taking personal 
responsibility for our choices 

6
00:00:21,400 --> 00:00:24,400
and actions and not blaming 
anybody else. 

7
00:00:24,900 --> 00:00:30,100
And owning that we can be the 
best we can. 

8
00:00:30,500 --> 00:00:34,900
We can be all that we want to be
at any stage if we commit to 

9
00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:37,500
making the choices in that 
direction. 

10
00:00:38,100 --> 00:00:42,800
So with that, as a slight 
overview, today, we're going to 

11
00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:47,000
talk about a question that we've
been thrown quite a few times is

12
00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:52,300
halfway houses socialize. 
Yes. 

13
00:00:52,500 --> 00:00:55,600
Have we lost our ability to 
socialize? 

14
00:00:55,900 --> 00:00:58,500
What is going on? 
You know, a lot of people. 

15
00:00:58,800 --> 00:01:01,300
Well, we have a couple of really
A crappy years there and we'll 

16
00:01:01,300 --> 00:01:03,100
just leave it at that. 
I don't even like to use the 

17
00:01:03,100 --> 00:01:10,400
words or reference them in any 
way, but Things have gotten off 

18
00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:14,000
track with how people socialize.
They feel like they're losing 

19
00:01:14,000 --> 00:01:17,400
their skills to get out and say 
hi. 

20
00:01:18,100 --> 00:01:19,400
What do you think's going on 
there? 

21
00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:25,200
I mean, I know I've lost mine 
and I think it's also I think 

22
00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:28,200
it's also the motivation behind 
that. 

23
00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:31,200
I think motivation is a huge 
Factor. 

24
00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,500
You know, if you can do 
everything from home, look at 

25
00:01:34,500 --> 00:01:38,000
all these jobs people or seem to
be wanting that they can just I 

26
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,500
work from home and not going to 
the office anymore. 

27
00:01:40,500 --> 00:01:42,300
Personally, I don't understand 
that. 

28
00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:45,700
Well you and I both know that we
love coming into work. 

29
00:01:45,700 --> 00:01:48,500
Yeah, even if I have a long 
commute, which I, which I do 

30
00:01:48,500 --> 00:01:52,700
often I enjoy the process of 
that and also being in a 

31
00:01:52,700 --> 00:01:56,200
workspace. 
Yes, I think there are so much 

32
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,200
lost. 
I really, I really worried for, 

33
00:01:59,200 --> 00:02:01,800
especially the younger people 
who believe they can build a 

34
00:02:01,808 --> 00:02:04,600
career without ever going into 
the office. 

35
00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:06,200
I know that's the trend right 
now. 

36
00:02:06,200 --> 00:02:08,800
And, you know, maybe I'm Little 
old. 

37
00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,700
You know, I won't I won't 
question that you know, maybe 

38
00:02:11,700 --> 00:02:14,400
I'm a little outdated but I 
don't think so. 

39
00:02:14,600 --> 00:02:19,100
You don't have employed, I don't
even know, 200, 300 people in my

40
00:02:19,100 --> 00:02:24,300
lifetime and there's it's an 
intangible to meet people. 

41
00:02:24,300 --> 00:02:27,800
You're working with one-on-one 
regularly. 

42
00:02:27,800 --> 00:02:31,100
Everything I think also the 
energy exchange is really 

43
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:34,300
important especially in everyday
life and something. 

44
00:02:34,300 --> 00:02:41,500
I know that I've lost besides Is
the motivation is really getting

45
00:02:41,500 --> 00:02:46,300
inspired by different people and
different opinions and being 

46
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:50,900
okay with having that and being 
okay, with agreeing to disagree 

47
00:02:50,900 --> 00:02:56,100
or, you know, I don't know, I 
think, I think that's okay. 

48
00:02:56,100 --> 00:03:02,100
And I think with all the online 
dating and all the texting and 

49
00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:06,100
dming, and social media, I feel 
like people socialize in a 

50
00:03:06,108 --> 00:03:09,000
different way. 
Now, You know, going out to 

51
00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:12,000
dinner with someone is quite 
outlandish. 

52
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:15,900
Whereas I know back in the day 
that was, you know, we did I 

53
00:03:15,900 --> 00:03:19,300
mean people get together for 
coffee and drinks but I don't 

54
00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:21,100
think they're longer than an 
hour or so. 

55
00:03:21,100 --> 00:03:25,200
You know I'm used to spending 
hours upon hours with my people 

56
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:29,400
with my friends and I think 
that's something that is. 

57
00:03:29,400 --> 00:03:31,900
So it'll all relevant point and 
you know what? 

58
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:35,600
And it dinner doesn't have to be
expensive when I first moved to 

59
00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:38,200
the city and this is really 
dating myself but it was Back in

60
00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:40,600
the 80s. 
I used to have throw dinner 

61
00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:43,000
parties and tell everybody to 
bring something. 

62
00:03:43,300 --> 00:03:47,200
I mean, I used to when I did the
first ones, I would make a 

63
00:03:47,200 --> 00:03:49,800
couple of like tea sandwiches 
and say, come for tea 

64
00:03:49,800 --> 00:03:51,100
sandwiches. 
Yeah. 

65
00:03:51,100 --> 00:03:55,600
And I've done picnics in Central
Park, when I was a dancer with 

66
00:03:55,600 --> 00:03:58,700
little to no money, we'd all 
just pitch in with Trader. 

67
00:03:58,700 --> 00:04:00,200
Joe's. 
And we don't just have picnics 

68
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:03,300
in the park in the summer. 
I definitely feel like that is 

69
00:04:03,300 --> 00:04:07,300
lost or we're old. 
So how do we get it back? 

70
00:04:07,400 --> 00:04:10,900
How do we Bring back that 
socializing Mojo. 

71
00:04:11,100 --> 00:04:13,500
That makes you want to get out 
and meet people and makes you 

72
00:04:13,500 --> 00:04:17,200
feel comfortable with it. 
So I guess I can tell you 

73
00:04:17,200 --> 00:04:20,000
firsthand. 
Yeah, be okay with asking 

74
00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:23,300
someone out. 
No, no, I'm not a girl. 

75
00:04:23,300 --> 00:04:26,000
Not or anything. 
That's how Diane and I met. 

76
00:04:26,100 --> 00:04:29,500
I asked her a true he did. 
Do you want to get coffee? 

77
00:04:29,700 --> 00:04:33,100
You want to hang out with you? 
I think you like me. 

78
00:04:33,400 --> 00:04:37,300
Let's say, I think it's totally 
okay with approaching other 

79
00:04:37,300 --> 00:04:41,100
people as well and if they're 
worried about it, that's cool. 

80
00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:44,000
It's true, that's cool. 
You know, it doesn't make any 

81
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:47,400
difference with someone else's 
reaction to is it is you know 

82
00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:50,900
your Outreach your attempt to 
connect and communicate. 

83
00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:54,300
What's important is that you try
Because unless you do try to 

84
00:04:54,300 --> 00:04:58,100
have no idea what could happen. 
And as Charlotte said, it's 

85
00:04:58,100 --> 00:05:01,500
funny we did, we were both 
invited separately to a charity 

86
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:07,600
event to cover it as media 
personalities and we receive at 

87
00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:11,700
the In table and Charlotte kind 
of popped in like a world. 

88
00:05:11,700 --> 00:05:15,600
Winning popped out on her 
bicycle, with her bicycle helmet

89
00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:17,600
on. 
And if I didn't between there, 

90
00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:22,500
there was like, she seems cool I
guess she thought I was okay. 

91
00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:27,800
And we, you know, connected, we 
exchanged numbers and we decided

92
00:05:27,800 --> 00:05:31,800
to get together and we add a cup
of coffee and which is always a 

93
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,600
safe way to start that first 
meeting. 

94
00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:36,200
Because if it's not like a 
connection, yeah, you can get up

95
00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:39,700
and walk away but it's so, So 
important to plan the second one

96
00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:43,400
or you know, a time when you 
know you don't have to leave in 

97
00:05:43,400 --> 00:05:47,300
15 minutes or 30 minutes where 
you can have that extended time 

98
00:05:47,300 --> 00:05:49,700
together, don't you think? 
Yeah, yeah, I do. 

99
00:05:49,700 --> 00:05:53,400
I think keeping also the 
conversation open ended and one 

100
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:57,500
of the possibilities and yes, we
might not have time right now, 

101
00:05:57,500 --> 00:06:02,300
but maybe we can take time to be
together in the summer, or, I 

102
00:06:02,308 --> 00:06:04,000
don't know. 
I know people travel a lot. 

103
00:06:04,000 --> 00:06:05,900
I know everyone's working at 
home. 

104
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:07,800
I know everybody's always 
online. 

105
00:06:07,900 --> 00:06:12,000
Line, but I think that's, that's
what's wrong with the world, 

106
00:06:12,300 --> 00:06:16,000
that's what gets depression. 
That's what gets us stuck in our

107
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:20,100
ways. 
I think I seriously believe that

108
00:06:20,100 --> 00:06:23,600
if I hadn't had asked you out, I
would be at a loss right now. 

109
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:28,300
And just, and if I hadn't said 
yes, we even though I thought 

110
00:06:28,300 --> 00:06:31,300
wait a second, she's got to be 
at least 30 years younger than 

111
00:06:31,300 --> 00:06:33,700
me. 
Why is she? 

112
00:06:35,300 --> 00:06:41,600
You know, she It's a moment that
I'm so glad happened. 

113
00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:45,800
Yeah and it's one moment one 
moment and it's saying yes to 

114
00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:49,300
the moment as it arises just 
being willing to say, I'm going 

115
00:06:49,300 --> 00:06:52,900
to try that. 
And I think that's how to start 

116
00:06:52,900 --> 00:06:55,400
socializing. 
It's that simple just get out 

117
00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:59,300
there and just don't be afraid 
to all somebody out because if 

118
00:06:59,300 --> 00:07:04,100
you said no you said no. 
He said no, I've survived bigger

119
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:09,700
words than know. 
Okay, so get out there. 

120
00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:13,100
Well, thanks for joining us. 
I'm Diane we're cell. 

121
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,600
I'm Charlotte region. 
And this is the silver to speed 

122
00:07:15,600 --> 00:06:52,900
against podcast. 
And I think that's how to start 

123
00:06:52,900 --> 00:06:55,400
socializing. 
It's that simple just get out 

124
00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:59,300
there and just don't be afraid 
to all somebody out because if 

125
00:06:59,300 --> 00:07:04,100
you said no you said no. 
He said no, I've survived bigger

126
00:07:04,100 --> 00:07:09,700
words than know. 
Okay, so get out there. 

127
00:07:10,300 --> 00:07:13,100
Well, thanks for joining us. 
I'm Diane we're cell. 

128
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,600
I'm Charlotte region. 
And this is the silver to speed 

129
00:07:15,600 --> 00:07:16,600
against podcast.