Welcome to episode 51 up. Girl Take the Lead were each
week. We explore Womanhood and
Leadership, woohoo. It's our first episode for 2023.
And we are so excited to have you here.
Every year. We see tons of ads about New
Year's resolutions, and a lot of the times I'm paralyzed, it,
they definitely become a big. Should this year.
I was hearing more and more into more about intentions and how
they were different from resolutions.
And how goals fit in, I was real familiar with goals because
they're always a part of a marketing plan that I've ever
done. So I I thought we dig in and
look together at this, With a Little Help from Jay Shetty and
his book, think, like a monk train.
Your mind for peace and purpose every day.
He has a lot to say about intention so I'll bring that
research to you today. In this episode, you may know
Jay Shetty as a social media Superstar and hosted the podcast
on purpose which takes aspects of having been a monk Two
practical everyday living. He spent four summers in India,
interning at corporations and training.
With the international Society for Krishna Consciousness, and
three years, living a Vedic, monk lifestyle, at an ashram in
Mumbai. India here you go.
Thanks for listening. So let's start by looking at the
definitions of in tension and resolution Diana.
Rob, a psychologist. And author says an intention is
something you want to manifest in your life or some guiding
principle that you want to live. By while resolutions are hard
and fast goals that are either achieved or broken.
Intentions are broader ideas So then I started to wonder what is
the difference between an intention and a goal.
And here's what I found, a goal describes what you want to do in
the future. So then I wondered what's the
difference between an intention and a goal and I found this a
goal describes what you want to do in the future.
It focuses on external accomplishments and is something
you can clearly check off a list like go rock climbing or make a
successful pie crust and intention describes how you want
to feel its focus is internal on your relationship with yourself.
So in my search I found this take interesting, resolution
seem to ask us to be perfect something we can never achieve
resolution seem to focus only on the outcome, not the journey.
So in setting an intention you resolve that you're already
enough. So you move forward without
having an attachment to the outcome.
It's more about the journey so then I wonder like what makes
resolutions fail then. So here's what I found.
Many people blame their failure to fulfill resolutions on a lack
of time, resources or motivation or a loss of passion after
starting. Only about 16 percent of people
are able to follow their resolutions.
The majority give up within 1 to 6 weeks of starting and many of
these resolutions are repeated year after year, some of the
resolutions bail. Because one We've set
unrealistic resolutions to we lack accountability 3, there's
no tracking or review for. There's a lack of planning
five-week have self-doubt. And six the resolution is
unclear. So given these pitfalls after
looking at intentions, which we said our broader in scope.
Could they be more appealing to do for the beginning of the new
year? So, here's what I found in Jay.
Shetty's book in chapter 4 where he begins to talk about
intentions. So, here's a quote from that
book. In our heads, we have an image
of an ideal life, our relationships, how we spend our
time and work, and Leisure, what we want to achieve Even without
the noise of external influences certain goals, Captivate Us.
And we design our lives around, achieving them, because we think
they will make us happy. But now we will figure out what
drives these Ambitions, whether they are likely to make us truly
happy and whether happiness is even the right target.
So it gives us a story about having come out of a class, and
he was strolling in the ashram with the senior Monk and a few
other students. And, as they walked, the senior
monk mentions, the achievements of some of the other monks, they
pass. And he points out that This one
can meditate for eight hours. Straight a few minutes later.
He gestures to another and he says, this one fast for seven
days in a row further along he points.
Do you see the man sitting under the tree?
He can recite every verse from the scripture impressed.
Jay says, I wish I could do that, the monk pauses and turns
to him, he says, do you wish you could do that or do you wish you
could learn? Learn to do that.
What do you mean he asks and he says think about your
motivations. Do you want to memorize all the
scripture? Because it's an impressive
achievement or do you want the experience of having studied it?
In the first, all you want, is the outcome in the second.
You are curious about what you might learn from the process.
And Jay said, he says this New Concept for me was A New Concept
for me and it blew my mind and reading this, I got to tell you,
it blew my mind to he goes on to talk about for motivations from
a hindoo philosopher and the first one is fear.
Which is being driven by sickness poverty, fear of Hell,
or fear of death. The second one is desire seeking
personal gratification through success wealth and pleasure.
The third one is Duty motivated by gratitude responsibility and
the desire to do the right thing.
And the last one is love compelled for care for others
and the urge to help them. so, if we take these motivations and
we look at them, And are honest to our with ourselves about what
our motivations actually are. We can then look at and begin to
question our intentions and see them a bit more deeply and the
way he suggest we do that is the why ladder wh-why?
And it takes these for motivations, these states are
the roots of all intentions. You develop your intentions to
drive forward. So your intention is who you
plan to be in order to act with purpose and feel that what you
are doing is Meaningful. So what I did was I took this as
an exercise for myself so and you can be involved in this
because it has to do with the podcast.
I thought we would use that as an example.
You know, because he says that having an intention alone isn't
enough, we have to live our intentions, it needs to permeate
our behavior and we need to consider the work.
We need to do behind what we want to achieve.
So the why ladder you probably might be familiar with this.
It's asking the question. Why fiber six times, let's start
with this example. My intention is to provide you
our listener, a unique podcast experience, where you feel
inspired motivated and learn something new about leadership
from different generational perspectives.
So the first why, why is that important?
And I could say well the girl Take the Lead podcast can grow
because of this unique format. And why is that important?
Then I said, well, reaching more people equals more potential,
diverse effective leaders, especially women of younger
Generations. Will why is that important?
More effective leaders can help others belong.
Learn to enhance their own performance and Foster their
own, creativity and teamwork. Well, why is that important?
And I thought well maybe by understanding and observing the
dimensions of leadership, we can suffer less and Lead others with
empathy and compassion. Well, why is that important?
Then it was, I'd like to help other women from feeling less
than like I did in my career. And why is that important?
Because that is about me being helpful.
And feeling useful. So, if we look at those, you can
see that. I'm I went back and looked at
the four motivations and I thought, okay, it's Duty and
love perhaps that's really guiding me.
And one thing he talks about is that there's no pure intention.
There's no like 100% good service, you know, our ego
always kind of gets involved in that and there's different
percentages. So like for Duty.
When you look at my intention that we just talked About.
Perhaps it's you know 30% and love would be 70%, you know and
depending how we look at them, perhaps that percentage changes.
So that's one way to look at it. And because intentions, permeate
our Behavior, we have to live, Our intention and avoid those
Wishful, manifestations. Like I wish I could do this, or
I wish I were a better podcaster, or I wish.
I were in the top 1% of podcasters, all of that stuff
because you have to really be willing to do the work.
And we've brought that up. Before in our podcast,
especially about doing Byron, Katie's work, he has a nice way
of looking at this. So if you take your to-do list
to include also, who you need to be to achieve that.
So here's my example, let's say on my to-do list which is there
keep researching leadership topics about using our five
themes that we pointed out in the last episode, our voice
Observing our emotions learning from others developing
strategies to listen to ourselves and have fun.
And so then the question is, who do I need to be to to that?
And what came up was, I need to be organized in order to
research and I need to execute plans so that requires
organization and also involves curiosity and passion.
So that's who I need to be to achieve that.
Let's say, I also have on my to-do list, which I do is to
invite gas that challenge the status quo and support women as
Leaders. So then who do I need to be to
do that? I need to be able to seek and
accept help from others, including men who championed the
efforts of women. So, that was cool to see.
And then also on my to-do list, I have develop and execute a
Content marketing plan, So who do I need to be to do that?
I need to suspend whatever I think I know and continue to be
a beginner in personal branding. So maybe that's helpful to you.
I know you probably thought resolutions might be looking a
lot easier than doing intentions, but in order to
achieve those things we want to do, I agree that we have to do
work around that. There's another section.
I thought in the chapter chapter 4 again of this book that I
thought was really helpful and it's called seeds and weeds and
they can be summarized in this Tick-Tock he did one of my
favorite meditation practices that I do, which is the smallest
and shortest part of my meditation is that I've refined
my intention, what I mean by that is every day I write down
thoughts in my mind that are either weeds or seeds.
Seeds are ones that I want to grow seeds of things that I want
to plant, because they're full of love compassion, empathy.
Kindness, And the weeds agreed negativity manipulation power
control. So here's the takeaway about
intentions. Perhaps resolutions.
Haven't worked because they haven't been realistic or they
weren't internally motivated. Perhaps they were shoulds
instead of wants And because intentions are broader in scope,
we can do some work around them and use the why ladder.
So we better understand our motivations about who we need to
be in order to reach our goals associated with them.
And that's where the real work happens.
Shifting ourselves to be someone.
We need to be So to help you along and to enter episode
today, I thought it would be great to have a little
motivation from the movie mr. Carter, we're Team accrues
recites the poem by Marianne Williamson.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that, we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens
us. Your playing small does not
serve the world. There is nothing enlightened
about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure
around you. We were all meant to shine as
children, do it's not just in some of us, it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give
other people permission to do the same as we are liberated
from our own fear. Our presence automatically
liberates others. Thank you for joining us for
this episode. We hope this kicks off your new
year with an approach to intentions that might be helpful
throughout the year. So in keeping with our intention
for this podcast, I'm asking for your help to tell others about
this podcast. Subscribe and comment, join our
girl Take the Lead Facebook page and visit our website.
We just loaded up a freebie which are the pie instructions.
Rebecca gave us in Episode 44, and it's all outlined there for
you. Next week, we'll talk about
personal branding, and a key component of that storytelling,
no matter what our generation. We all are a personal brand as a
marketer for so many years. Executing branding was my job
and I can outline some of the components of personal branding
for you. Plus our research.
What others have to say on the topic.
I hope you'll join me and talk to you soon.
Oh. And by the way, Coming the week
of January 23rd. Our podcast will be one year
old. So stay tuned.
As we celebrate our birthday. Talk to you later.
Thanks for being here.