Hello and welcome to Big Gay energy.
I'm Bree. I'm Fiora and I'm Caitlin come
along with us while we dive into the fun and nuances of queer
media representation matters. And we're here to talk about it.
Welcome back friends. The BGE team has a very special
guest today. Please welcome love Bailey.
We are so excited to talk to you today.
Hi, y'all. Thank you so much for joining
us. Really appreciate it, especially
during the holidays and stuff during Treads.
Giving - holiday, no, we're going to colonize this for our
own gender exploration. Good.
That's, that's What we should be celebrating honestly.
So, looking at your socials, we noticed that you have like
projects going on all the time. You're very busy person, which
is awesome and we're wondering what projects are you working on
right now? So I'm launching my new music
video called horn, Asia, and it's for a single that I wrote
during the pandemic, during the Panasonic, the pain Demi Lovato
at a time. When I was really going through
it with this whole Marilyn Manson thing and we'll get to
that. Later.
But this is kind of like my feet in Phoenix rising and my claim
to like find my empowerment again and to rise up through the
ashes. And I made this really fun horny
track and I made a music video it with some of the queers that
I love and yeah we're going to launch it next next week or week
or so. Something like that.
We're going to launch it excited.
That's great. That's so exciting.
And so soon what date just in case because because for the
people watching and listening, yeah, we don't have a date yet
but it's supposed to be on December 11 summer, ate
something like Sound well will definitely post whenever yes and
Mariano is actually in the music video.
Come say hi Molly on. Hello good.
Yeah I was part of one of the dancers and I held with Alec or
we change this bar into this glamorous.
Beautiful place last night club. Yeah.
With like velvet like curtains and sex and yeah, so cool.
So we're very professionally. Hey.
Yeah, I know. Yeah.
It's always. There's always a lot of work
behind that in a scene. Yeah, always.
So yeah, we're excited to see the how the music video.
How it turns out. Yeah so yeah we're excited.
They're gonna watch it tonight on the big screen.
No, the song is Bomb. Yes, listen to it after this
interview. Yeah.
How has music impacted your life?
Music is very healing for me. I would say my mother.
She was in a rock and roll band before she went to prison and I
crawled up in her bass drum, every time I would fall asleep,
I would just call up there. And and that's why Rhythm is a
part of me. So I became a dancer because
rhythm is like so a part of my soul and I wasn't really able, I
was more into fashion and dance and I sort of like found music
When I needed to like find my truth and speak my voice and
like it was so empowering me to use my voice and to conjure work
towards and to tell about talk about my story and my struggles
through music and pair that with visuals.
That's where my slowly feels the best.
And I really feel the most liberated when I can tell my
story through fashion music, dance costume, fantasy, that's
kind of my calling to This fucked up planet and sounds like
the perfect medium for like everything to kind of come
together and just create something beautiful.
Yeah, like media and art is such a great outlet for everything.
Yeah, we all couldn't connect. We all can relate to something.
That's very true. Well, some of us, you know, that
the ones that are shooting down, you know.
Okay, nightclubs. Yeah, that is the world we live
in. It's all of us would have some
sort of outlet to release our pain, to least release our
emotions. I feel like the world would be a
better place, but unfortunately, we don't want people or the
society, the man and, and the government doesn't want you to
have that source of release. And so a lot of people are pent
up and frustrated and these religious groups keep pushing
these agendas so it's unfortunate but it's more now
more than ever these artists, including myself, we have to
come together and show people the way by example.
So hopefully we can do that. Share the love.
Yeah, art has the power to change the world.
For sure. I think that's in my Instagram
bio. Is that I think you say that
every now and again are there any artists in particular that
you draw inspiration from or admire by Caitlin?
I am really fond of Zachary Drucker.
Zachary Drucker is a trans writer director producer.
She produced transparent of film that I was gone and I really
admire her. She's very young and she's a
Trailblazer in the industry, but as we know, Hollywood isn't
really fond of women directors and running the show.
Let alone a trans woman running the show, so it's kind of
unheard of what she's able to. Accomplish.
So I really admire her and I looked up to her.
That's why I try Blazer. Yeah, yeah.
So a little topics which from music we love that you created
Savage Ranch, can you explain what it is and why it was so
important for you to create the space?
Well, if we are here. So here are Savage French.
I love that staircase. This part.
Yeah, in trans macula. Temecula which I've colonizes
trans. Macula is a republican town
where there is no gay clubs. There's maybe one Drag Brunch,
that happens. It's up, there's a lot of
religious groups, it's a wine country.
So people come to have a good time so it's not as a repressed
as some other places. However the like the core of its
values is very patriarchal pick patriarchal.
And Republican. So, needless to say, this is a
beacon of light in a town that doesn't really have that does
it, this doesn't exist. So when I came here, my mother
came here first and she started an animal rescue and she called
me up. I was working as a Fashion
Stylist in New York and she was like, come home stopped, living
the gypsylifestyle. I bought a house for you up the
hill, and I turned it into an artist Sanctuary because this
land is also very magical And I felt like it was very important
for me to take this privilege that I was blessed with and give
it and share it to the ones I love.
And it's been a blessing. We've had Raves here which are
so much fun and all kinds of art, Gatherings and workshops
and artists come and stay in the Bungalows.
We rented out for Airbnb. A space people come and do their
photo shoots. So it's just a Mecca of
creativity. And when you're on this land,
you're in. Spire and you can't help but
want to create and sort of relaxes the concrete jungle and
you don't you don't think about the problems of the world when
you're here in this beautiful place.
Hey, I think on Airbnb, I saw a list and everything was just
blue. That's the blue room and they
are mostly everything is red. So if you see like this is the
red living room and then upstairs.
That's my room. So that's all right up there.
But the blue room is the guest bedroom, it's so great.
That people have a space where they know like fully accepted
and safe, especially like traveling and stuff, you'd never
know like what could happen and how people will.
Out. My mother is a Butch lesbian so
you can rest assure that it's the greatest thing you'll ever
see. I love that so much especially
in Texas. People need that we actually I
mean we're accepting of straight people, but I myself am, you
know, I have a lot of Trauma from straight people.
Straight people can rip be really mean and cruel to trans
people, especially and also to clear people.
But so we accept were accepting of all.
But you know, if there is any Des or bigotry homophobia.
Racism of any kind like that is the door darling.
Get on down the road, honey. So I'm kind of curious so it
sounds like I just a safe haven for just like a make sure people
artists people who need a safe space.
People are vacationing that need to say space or place or there
except I like Caitlyn said. So how do people experience the
ranch? Like is kind of how that process
work. Yeah, I mean Pierce face and
owner Airbnb or the two platforms that people like that
are just, you know, Outsiders can come experience.
I do. Welcome people.
Slide in our GM's on Savage, Ranch on Instagram or love, is
Bailey on my Instagram, and I'll give you my email, and then from
there, you have to give me a proposal.
As to what you want to create, what body of work you want to
create why you want to come here, why it's important to you
and what you want to leave behind, how you want to see the
space to grow and we welcome that sort of energy.
It's not really like people think it's a sex orgy or it's a
kalter, all that bullshit and And like while we do you know
allow people to explore their sexual desires in you know,
consensually of course. It's not that really that's not
why I created this space, you know, I want people to have a
purpose with whatever their intentions are and to really
think about the land and think about their art Beyond just the
superficial That's really beautiful.
I really love that. The, what do you want to leave
behind? How do you want to impact the
space? I love that.
How do you want to impact Mother Earth?
How do you want to take care of this land when you're gone?
Speaking of impact that we have a big big question for you.
How big Like now I'll just ask it.
So what is your legacy like one or two things that you would
want the world to remember about you?
Oh gosh, I I'm a Libra. So I guess the balance of being
connected to your inner Savage, your inner wildness, but also
your ability to create and manifest and to nurture, and to
care for others and to create connectivity.
And community and to ignite a flame within someone's Soul,
someone who maybe, you know, living as a zombie or, you know,
working that 9 to 5 and don't have a sense of purpose.
I helped ignite people's purpose, and on life, and threw
me for whatever reason they're able to mirror their own
potential. And I want people to achieve
their biggest potential and to to find that calling within
themselves. So, I hope I'm able to mirror
that and others. I feel like we just keep saying
I love that but I mean yeah, people do that and that's again
that's goes back to like how do you want to?
What do you want to leave behind, like in the world and
how do you want to impact the space around?
You like that's so beautiful. And a lot of people have trouble
tapping into that themselves. So being like a guide to
creativity that's really. Yeah.
And also like just make wanting to make a difference.
Difference. And yeah, positively like with
our podcast, our whole goal is to like raise awareness for
queer media and just advocate for like more and just create a
safe space for people. So it's always great talking to
people who are doing something like that in other spaces as
well. We need Rebels with a cause you
know, there's like the idea of punk has transformed and now
it's like cooler to be, it's more.
Punk to be someone who's like, helping advocate for others, and
helping save this fucked-up situation.
I think to me that's more Punk than someone who's actively like
trying to destroy every system and like, you know we have to
like each other and bring people together to help us in this
weird transition right now because the world is going
through a transition and it's going to be really uncomfortable
before it gets better, but we need more forward, thinkers
more. Venters more visionaires to come
forward, and help us out of this really dark time.
So I hope we can all do that. Yes.
Focus on building versus tearing things down.
Please cuz some days it just seems so difficult.
Even on social media, this idea of cancel culture.
Like, everyone thinks there are social Warrior.
Everyone thinks they're calling out somebody and holding them
accountable and while I, you know, advocate for people to use
their voice and I have counseled Marilyn Manson, we all know.
It's like there is a time and a place when that is very
necessary but as a whole we have taken it too far.
And there are times when I've come out about You know,
advocating for Trans people to get the medical surgery, they
won all of a sudden, the non-binary community comes out
of the woodwork to cancel me. And it's it's strange because
it's usually like these cysts men with long hair that are like
the new hippies and now they know more about my experience
than I do myself. And so now they're like pointing
the finger at me, and I'm a trans woman talking from my own
experience, my own lived experience, what I would like to
see and how I want to advocate. Wait for that.
So we have to, when we're like, the leftist has become so much
more rigid. Now, we have to, like,
understand that balance in life, because cancel culture doesn't
work if you want to look be a social justice Warrior, go out
and vote, go out and like, you know, be the mayor be the person
who's in charge of X y&z. Like, go out into these Arenas,
where none of us exists, like, that's going to make change
versus. Like you talking into a bubble.
With people who are get patting you on the back saying oh yeah,
how dare that person do that? Something it's not going to do
any change, it's not going to do any good.
So that's what I hope for. Like, in terms of cancel colder,
I feel like people think there's like a right way and a wrong way
and like, but there's like, you know, area around, it kind of
like gender in itself. Like, yeah, there's no deviation
from that, but That's not realistic.
Gender has become so rigid. Now that it doesn't leave room
for exploration, it doesn't make someone who's questioning
themselves want to explore because now it's like, oh,
you're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't, you
know. Yeah.
It's like, who Am I? Who am I to say, what your
expression is, or who you are? That's not up for my
interpretation. That's up for you to figure out.
Yeah, I feel like it's important, like you said, like,
to listen to people with, for their experiences, because
everyone has a unique experience, a unique journey
through life and like, we need to should be listening and not
like, rejecting onto other people's experiences, starting
to get a little, like angry. Because, I, whatever we talk
about these things, I'm just like, could like, it's so
frustrating. That's it is it is but we can't
be bitter. We're too pretty.
Yeah totally love it. Alright so to segue just a
little bit I guess kind of off topic so one of your Instagram
posts states that your transition was a radical Act of
self-love. Can you tell us a little bit
about your journey with that? So in order to transition at
least in America Erica. You have to do in yourself,
gender dysphoria, can, and it's sort of a backwards way of
saying you're crazy, you're cuckoo crazy, and you need this
surgery to help you with your cuckoo crazy syndrome.
And I, as much as like, I will sign up for that and I will tell
them what they want to hear. So that I can get my free surge
at the core of my transition. I don't feel crazy.
I don't feel cuckoo. I don't feel delusional.
No, I don't feel like I have mental illness because of that,
I think my mental illness comes from society.
And when people cost me in the Ralph's fucking shopping center
for using my designated bathroom, telling me, I need to
use the men's restroom. I'm now having to deal with that
rage from that person a costing me.
So that's where my mental health is, it's not from my sense of
identity. So when I say, my sense of
identity is a radical Act of self-love, it is, it's a
courage. It's a calling to, To be who I
want to be. It's me taking that leap of
faith saying this is who I am and to me that's a radical Act
of self-love. I love it.
But thank you for sharing that
and I'm sorry, I'm sorry that people do stuff like that
because yeah you don't deserve that and nobody does just for
granted you, this, we're going pissed.
Yeah. For trying to me, God damn it.
Oh, my gosh. Well, since we were on the topic
of America, what has been your experience been like being Trans
in America? Specifically, I know you just
talked a little bit about it, but Terrible.
Appalling embarrassing, humiliating degrading.
Yeah, but thanks to Obamacare. I have new breasts.
Thanks Obama. Thanks Obama great.
We love you do. Yeah.
So that's my experience. Hopefully.
Has been your experience in America you know.
Like that's why we have to stay so close to our queer bubbles
because that is where I Feel Love.
That's where I feel validated protected nourished inspired is
with the angels. I surround myself with however
that's not the case when you go into these public spaces where
these bigots are just free to do whatever they want and they're
inspired to do that because these political leaders are
inspiring people. Will to act out, and to be
violent and to degrade humans for just their lifestyle
choices. Quote, unquote, for just being,
for existing for being different, for being not the
status quo. These bigots are running around,
you know, killing people, and they're free to do that now
because the political propaganda is telling them, it's okay.
So that's why it's important for us to come together and to like
create more of these queer safe. Bubbles safe havens.
No, absolutely, especially when it comes to like, queer Youth
and trans kids. And so, if you could give a
message to like the trans kids across the world, like, what
would you say to them? Well, first of all me, even
speaking on that I'm going to be like, thought I was a groomer,
which is so disgusting when all of us have an inner child that
we're trying to protect so really, it's not me speaking to
another child. It's me speaking to my inner
child. And knowing what I would have
wanted for myself at a young age.
So, for one, we didn't have Heroes growing up.
So I had no one to mirror. What I wanted to be when I was
older, so it took me longer to transition and find myself,
which is, it's actually, you know, if I had someone, I might
have transitioned sooner and it would have been easier.
I would have had gone through less surgeries to become the
woman, I am today. Now, of course, there's this
whole debate, They're like, surgeries are safe and hormones
are safe, that's something up to a doctor.
And I hope that license practitioners like understanding
the effects in the body and can make those choices.
I cannot make that for you, but I can say for myself
transitioning, later I had to go through more pain and suffering
than if I was to change the effects of hormones that are
earlier age. So I hope that you know, me
existing and mirroring that can help someone else make their own
choices. And decisions.
I am not trying to groom anyone into being something that I want
to see. I think it's so ridiculous how
they've, you know, they want to make these their children, the
scapegoat for everything. But while they're actually doing
that, they're like putting children in concentration camps,
they're kicking out their kids for their lifestyle choices,
making them homeless. So, when we have these holidays,
you know, these kids are coming to the ranch.
I have to save them, I have to feed them.
I have to Nurture them. I have to take care of them
because the parents of bigots who are saying the same things,
as you're a groomer, your this have out Caster their children.
So if they really cared about kids that much, why are these
kids put in concentration camps? Why are they kicking out these
why is all the queer youth homeless if they cared so much
about their child? So it's the the Hippocratic Oath
of it all. That's what I said.
It's incredibly frustrating and the cognitive do.
Yeah, this is wild. I'm sorry.
You're getting more angry but illness of America.
Yeah. But but to your point to like
speaking to your like we talked about this on the podcast, all
the time when we talk about represent like representation in
the different forms and it's always comes down to like well
if I had this when I was a kid this will help me like and
that's so important. So you know representation
really does matter. So Like, thank you for being
representation for. So there's somebody out there
who sees you and it's like, oh yeah, some it helps them.
It does, it makes a difference and as much as I love like,
nurturing children like I myself don't actually want to be near
children. So throw your bigots out there
that think we're groomers like, please keep your children away
from me. I don't want your children
running around. I don't want to hear your child
whining. I want to hear you yelling at
your children in a public bathroom while I'm trying to
take a piss in peace. Please stop.
Pop. If you could go back to
yourself, like talk to yourself, when you were 10 years old, what
would you say or would you give advice or say something about
your future? Yeah, I mean, as a child, I was
always told that I was never going to amount to anything and
I would have to say, like, you know, the pain and struggling
that you are suffering. Now, is only temporary.
And if you could only just like, find that inner Flame, Like
you'll never be alone and you'll never, you'll always have a
place to call home if you find that home within yourself.
Oh my God. I wish I was wrong.
I was yelling cheese, so good. Yeah, I mean, you know, I is my
inner Saboteur, right? Yeah.
So everyone out there. Your inner child.
Got something for that. It's my did.
Yeah. Okay.
So to switch gears I just a little bit, all kind of a lot.
Is there something you have in your life that you have that?
You can absolutely cannot live without Doesn't have to be a
tangible thing. Well, I mean logistically water
any. Yes I would have to say music
dance fashion glamour, glamour, glamour of my life would be so
boring without it, I know. Do you feel like fashion?
Like really tells people who you are.
I think fashion is another form of capitalism that's been in,
manipulated, in the wrong hands of the wrong people.
However, there are Artisans to this day that still work in
fashion upholding the idea of fantasy and the idea of dressing
for pleasure. The idea of finding your
identity through fashion, which is very sacred.
So, I do think there are people Artisans that are actively
working in that space to change that system.
However, the A fashion makes its money and revenue and how you
know every year a company has to keep growing or it's not doing
its thing. I think that's system has to be
changed because it's really destroying the planet at a rapid
pace. And then fashion is becoming so
fleeting instead of like, you know, coveting, a piece and
holding that piece in your closet forever and passing it on
for Generations. You see, fast-fashion just
regurgitating It's for the masses and now ends up in
landfill after you've worn it once.
So when I was little, I thought you could only wear clothes once
because like always heard that on TV for some reason I'd like
characters never wear the same outfits.
So yeah, for so long. I thought you could only wear it
once. I was like, always embarrassed
to wear stuff over and over. It's just the meet society's
weird. Yeah, we can also be more
creative. Like, we don't know that like,
you know, you could take a shirt and sew it together with another
shirt, tied around your waist and all of a sudden it's a skirt
like we don't know how to do these things because we're not
taught DIY anymore. It used to be more punk.
You were like putting studs in your jacket.
You're painting this and painting that.
And if you had a Converse that was like, fucked up, you just
spray painted it and you'd like, give things new life, but we're
not teaching people to do that anymore.
We're like, I don't know what's going on, like, everything is so
capitalism. Yeah, yeah.
And I guess that's what it boils down to also, then people lose
that connection because like you were saying like fashion is just
it, it loses its essence. When it's just like this thing,
you buy and toss away versus like this thing that like can
connect you to like who you are and how you feel and things like
that. That I feel like it's very Lost
in Translation though. It's right.
I feel the best personally when I have made my peace or I've put
my hands on it in some way I feel is like a spell of
Liberation. Yeah.
And I feel so empowered. I feel like I'm on top of the
world because I've made that piece because I've sewn it or
recreate It it or painted it, or add my flare to it.
Suddenly it's a spell of love to myself.
So what we need to yours are and they don't want us to use our
hands with technology, they don't want us to know that we
have this innate power. They want us to rely on these
sources and spend more money. So if we can all just stop doing
that and just figure out what craft we can learn or pick up
like, we all have the power to do it but for some reason we
think that oh, we can't be an artist or we don't have that.
I'm not an artist. I'm not a good this or I'm not a
good that and we put our ourselves down instead of trying
to discover maybe falling down a few times and feeling stupid,
but ultimately finding that little creative spark, like we
all have it. So it's silly to say that you're
not going to be a good dancer. You're not going to be a good.
This it's like who says who? Yeah, I feel like often to it
gets Tethered to like making money where it's like it art
does not have to be monetized. Like that's ingrained in us to
like it's About like feeling and expressing and just doing it
doesn't have to be good. It just I made this like, that's
very, that's a, there's no feeling like that.
Like I made this thing. It has to feel good to you.
At the end of the day, We should all make a picture with macaroni
do. I don't know why that's what was
in my head, but that's what came out of my mouth.
You can cook it and eat it. Yeah, just don't paint it then.
Okay or using. Are you sleeping here?
None of that. So basically don't create art.
Just throw it in the pot. That's our to.
Yes actually. Yeah.
Cooking is an art. Yeah, that I really bad at it.
Stop telling yourself that. Yeah, Caleb who's true.
I'll work on it. Oh really in a pot?
That's some wet ass pussy. All right.
Thank you for going there. My son's Foghorn, Asia, after
all. What you that?
Well, we're here for it. I'm a sex siren.
What can I say you? Do you Empower everybody around
you? I will only.
What are you most proud of in your life?
My she knows. No.
What am I most proud of? I don't know.
There's so many things to be proud of in this world.
So many things. I think I'm proud of the fact
that I haven't given up when everyone has told me that you're
never gonna amount to anything, you're not going to make one.
You're not going to become a talented singer.
You're not going to do this. You're not going to be bad in
the face of Oppression. I actually rise up and I have
not quit. So I'm thankful for that.
Yes, resiliency is not an easy thing to do.
That is definitely something to be proud of ya.
So yeah. Yeah.
Is there anything you want people to know about you as a
person or as an artist I'm a terrible person and listen to
what you hear. Now, I don't know, I think
you've got a sense of who I am, you know.
I'm also not Mother Teresa. So don't take this and think I'm
like, the perfect person. You know, I go through some
shit. That's why I have a therapist
we're working on cognitive therapy right now.
Yes therapy. Yeah, no, I definitely have my
mood swings. And we all do, we all go through
some shit. So you know, pick yourself back
up when you fall down and you know that will Define your
character is like how fast you can get back up.
Absolutely. Well, that is the conclusion of
our questions. We just want to thank you so
much for being here, but before we like sign off, sign off.
Do you have any final words for our listeners at home before we
conclude good and subscribe? If you like what you heard?
Follow me on Instagram. Love is Bailey on Tick, Tock,
love Bailey on Savage, Ranch, Savage Ranch on Instagram.
I have a YouTube channel slather Studios.
I swear, I'll be posting my latest single horn, Asia, my
music video, it'll be available on Spotify, iTunes, all the
things and TuneIn, download and support, queer art because, you
know, we're Independent Artists were not backed by a lot of
money. It takes a lot of money and
resources to do what we do. So we really appreciate your
support. And with that, we've been big
gay energy. If you liked this episode check
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Stay safe and hydrate for lesbian Jesus.