1 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:03,080 Good morning. We have a great crowd here here 2 00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:05,080 today. We're excited to see everyone 3 00:00:05,080 --> 00:00:07,600 who's here. We have visitors, We have some 4 00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:10,480 familiar faces. Chris called you old familiar 5 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:11,720 faces. I'm not going to call you old. 6 00:00:11,720 --> 00:00:13,400 I'm going to call you just familiar faces. 7 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:15,600 And some of you, we used to be young. 8 00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:17,880 Now you're here visiting again. You're, you're getting older. 9 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:20,560 So it's, it's good to see all of our visitors, whether you're 10 00:00:20,560 --> 00:00:23,680 from the community or from another congregation. 11 00:00:23,680 --> 00:00:26,680 Good to have you today. And I'm looking forward to 12 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:28,080 leading us again through the study. 13 00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:30,520 And first, Peter, we're going on to Lesson 5. 14 00:00:31,000 --> 00:00:32,759 So he's laid a lot of groundwork. 15 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:37,800 He's laid a lot of groundwork to this point in the letter that I 16 00:00:37,800 --> 00:00:40,240 hope if you have not read it and you go back and read it, if 17 00:00:40,240 --> 00:00:43,000 you're joining us for the first time in this study or maybe 18 00:00:43,000 --> 00:00:45,320 you'll have a chance to go back and listen to our podcast. 19 00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:49,600 We have some wonderful people who work to put that on and to 20 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:52,280 put that together. So please go back and listen to 21 00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:54,600 that. If you wonder, hey, what about 22 00:00:54,600 --> 00:00:57,360 this though, we may have already covered and we may be moving 23 00:00:57,360 --> 00:01:00,080 past some details that you may have questions about. 24 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:03,320 And so if you are here today and you have questions about whether 25 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:06,040 it's the study or something else, because there's likely 26 00:01:06,040 --> 00:01:09,040 that you will see something today that brings questions to 27 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:11,720 your mind, please ask. We're happy to answer and give a 28 00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:14,720 defense for the hope that's in US and for the things that we do 29 00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:17,360 and for who we are. So please ask questions. 30 00:01:18,120 --> 00:01:19,520 It's good to see Ritu here today. 31 00:01:19,520 --> 00:01:21,600 She's been working to get those Sundays off. 32 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:24,360 Her boss was trying to push for work on Sundays, and she's been 33 00:01:24,360 --> 00:01:27,160 fighting against that. So praise God, it's an answer of 34 00:01:27,160 --> 00:01:28,640 prayers that she's here with us today. 35 00:01:30,520 --> 00:01:33,560 We've been talking about the people who are dispersed because 36 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:36,000 of persecution into all these regions. 37 00:01:36,120 --> 00:01:40,280 They've been spread out. They've been persecuted and 38 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:43,480 abused by their government. And he's telling them in these 39 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:47,280 last couple chapters how to thrive and how to live within 40 00:01:47,280 --> 00:01:49,440 that. And we talked about honoring 41 00:01:49,440 --> 00:01:52,840 everyone, even though you're being persecuted, honor others, 42 00:01:53,200 --> 00:01:56,520 even though they not might not be good to you, even though the 43 00:01:56,520 --> 00:01:59,200 brotherhood at times is full of faulted people. 44 00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:02,160 We're going to learn today we must be good and honor all 45 00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:07,120 people to love the brotherhood, God's people, to especially fear 46 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:09,160 God. And we talked about that last 47 00:02:09,160 --> 00:02:12,480 time, especially with the women. The women are told to to 48 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:15,760 surrender, to submit, but with the fear of God instead of a 49 00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:17,600 fear of what might happen to them. 50 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:19,480 And we're told to honor the king. 51 00:02:19,480 --> 00:02:21,560 That is regarding submission to government. 52 00:02:22,080 --> 00:02:24,880 And so here's just a summary of the things we talked about 53 00:02:24,880 --> 00:02:29,560 recently regarding government, your employers and wives to 54 00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:33,760 husbands and these dynamics. He tells them to submit us to 55 00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:36,600 government, us to our employers and wives to husbands. 56 00:02:36,600 --> 00:02:40,480 The instruction is to submit. It doesn't say they need to be 57 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:42,480 worthy. We're to submit regardless in 58 00:02:42,480 --> 00:02:45,800 their worthiness and to acknowledge and remember that 59 00:02:45,800 --> 00:02:49,280 suffering in this process. If that happens to you is a 60 00:02:49,280 --> 00:02:53,040 major thumbs up. Big bonus points you might say 61 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:55,080 from God. So don't don't be stressed out 62 00:02:55,080 --> 00:02:58,960 or surprised if you suffer. He said that's good because he 63 00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:02,920 says you're called to this. That's what Jesus did. 64 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:05,000 That's what happened with him. So if you're doing something 65 00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:07,280 right. If that happens and he says 66 00:03:07,560 --> 00:03:12,720 regarding to employers, to husbands, to wives and how we 67 00:03:12,720 --> 00:03:16,600 treat everybody, our instruction is to honour them regardless of 68 00:03:16,600 --> 00:03:19,440 their worthiness and to acknowledge that suffering is 69 00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:21,440 part of the process. And it's a major thumbs up. 70 00:03:21,640 --> 00:03:24,600 So we have honour and submission, which are huge 71 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:26,080 themes. They're going to apply to pretty 72 00:03:26,080 --> 00:03:29,760 much everything we do. We learned from the women It 73 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:32,720 said last time, wives likewise be submissive to your husband, 74 00:03:32,720 --> 00:03:36,160 to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, 75 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:40,320 they without a word maybe won by the conduct of their wives when 76 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,720 they observe your chase, conduct accompanied by fear. 77 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,560 We've already covered that and that statement. 78 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:49,640 When a woman does that, it's a powerful strength she's showing. 79 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:52,080 And when she does that, it's saying, God, I trust you. 80 00:03:52,360 --> 00:03:55,800 Even when it is difficult to submit to my husband, whatever 81 00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:59,320 he is, whatever he's doing, I trust you. 82 00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:02,960 God, she had said to her, do not let your adornment be merely 83 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:06,440 outward, arranging the hair, wearing gold, putting on fine 84 00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:07,800 apparel. He says don't let it be all 85 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:10,520 about that. Don't let it be only about that, 86 00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:13,840 but rather let it be the hidden or the inner person of the heart 87 00:04:14,120 --> 00:04:18,560 with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit which 88 00:04:18,560 --> 00:04:20,399 is very precious in the sight of God. 89 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:23,560 We had to go back through that because that's going to apply 90 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:26,800 directly to why he's going to tell the husbands what he's 91 00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:30,960 going to tell us. OK, so it part of his reasoning 92 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:34,800 was from this manner in the former times, the holy women who 93 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:38,760 trusted in God also adorned themselves being submissive to 94 00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:40,920 their own husbands. He's saying this has worked for 95 00:04:40,920 --> 00:04:43,600 a long time. Don't give up the example that 96 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:46,840 you've seen before. And he emphasized that they were 97 00:04:47,680 --> 00:04:51,240 trusting. And the ultimate lesson for 98 00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:53,640 women is this. A woman can trust her outward 99 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:59,600 beauty to make her really truly beautiful and to satisfy her to 100 00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:02,600 make other people may be leveraged by her beauty. 101 00:05:02,840 --> 00:05:06,840 Or she can trust God and and cultivate A gentle and quiet 102 00:05:06,840 --> 00:05:12,320 spirit with with a godliness. It comes back to trust in God. 103 00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:15,960 A woman can trust in her own ability to manipulate or control 104 00:05:15,960 --> 00:05:20,880 her husband or she can trust God and learn submission. 105 00:05:21,600 --> 00:05:24,520 It takes a lot of hard work on the woman's part and we need to 106 00:05:24,520 --> 00:05:26,080 honor them as we're going to see in a minute. 107 00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:29,480 Verse 6, as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him Lord, which 108 00:05:29,480 --> 00:05:32,920 means master, which means I'm you're my authority whose 109 00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:36,080 daughters you are if you do good and are not afraid with any 110 00:05:36,080 --> 00:05:38,920 terror. If you have questions, please go 111 00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:44,640 back to our previous study, but we learned that women need to be 112 00:05:44,880 --> 00:05:47,640 learned using this mindset that we all need to learn at some 113 00:05:47,640 --> 00:05:50,840 point in different ways to not be fear driven, but to be faith 114 00:05:50,840 --> 00:05:53,760 driven. A wise woman once told me, be 115 00:05:53,760 --> 00:05:57,440 aware of your fears. They're often areas God will 116 00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:00,480 challenge you in the future because they're areas you 117 00:06:00,480 --> 00:06:03,080 haven't yet surrendered or learned to trust in God. 118 00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:09,320 That applies to all of us. And now here's the instruction 119 00:06:09,320 --> 00:06:12,520 to the men. Everything he says to us is 120 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:14,040 built on what he said with the women. 121 00:06:14,040 --> 00:06:17,800 So we have to carry that here. He says husbands likewise 122 00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:23,600 husbands likewise dwell with them with understanding, giving 123 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:25,800 honour to the wife as to the weaker vessel. 124 00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:30,320 OK, first of all, likewise, how does the husband's role have 125 00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:33,880 anything likewise to do with what the woman had happened? 126 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:40,000 I think it's as simple as this. The husband's command is to not 127 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:43,040 look at ourselves like we are the one that this is all about. 128 00:06:43,560 --> 00:06:46,440 It's not all about us. The world does not exist to 129 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:49,960 serve us, and the women have learned that through submission. 130 00:06:49,960 --> 00:06:53,800 That isn't all about them. And so we likewise need to not 131 00:06:53,800 --> 00:06:55,640 look at ourselves like it's all about us. 132 00:06:55,920 --> 00:07:00,200 And we need to learn to honor them in the sight of God. 133 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:07,680 We do not use dominance to make us feel like we're the most 134 00:07:07,680 --> 00:07:11,760 important person in the room. We are given authority from God 135 00:07:11,760 --> 00:07:16,760 to be the leaders of our homes, but it's not a dominance that is 136 00:07:16,760 --> 00:07:18,840 unaware of the realities that are going on. 137 00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:21,800 We must learn to dwell with them. 138 00:07:21,800 --> 00:07:28,000 How with understanding just the phrase dwell with them is a 139 00:07:28,000 --> 00:07:31,600 shortcoming of many of us men in our in our marriages. 140 00:07:33,400 --> 00:07:35,840 If you were just told to dwell with them, what is that the 141 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:39,560 opposite of? There's a lot of marriages where 142 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:43,280 the husband is just there, where the husband and wife are 143 00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:50,200 roommates, where they are just kind of passing through the they 144 00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:54,280 share bills. That is not a biblical marriage. 145 00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:59,240 A biblical marriage is partnership in every sense of 146 00:07:59,240 --> 00:08:02,200 the word, and not dwelling with them is what that is intended to 147 00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:06,240 imply. Not disconnected, not try, not 148 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:11,200 not trying. It's presence many people, many 149 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:14,520 women or many of us as humans have quality time as our love 150 00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:20,320 language, but all of us need to feel dwelt with, to be feel like 151 00:08:20,320 --> 00:08:24,560 someone is there with us. You cannot make someone feel 152 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:28,400 appreciated by acts of service alone, by gifts alone. 153 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:32,440 They all all of our lives are going to take dwelling with them 154 00:08:33,840 --> 00:08:37,080 in this process, he says. Dwell with them with 155 00:08:37,080 --> 00:08:41,960 understanding. It's not enough to just be there 156 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:46,520 and to listen. It is a quality that we need to 157 00:08:46,520 --> 00:08:49,760 have an intentionality that they are understandable. 158 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:54,880 Now let me rephrase that. I guess I should say women think 159 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:56,400 differently than men do and that's OK. 160 00:08:56,720 --> 00:08:59,080 God designed us to be that way because our strengths leverage 161 00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:02,680 one another and we doesn't mean we have to fully understand 162 00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:05,320 everything but that word. Knowledge is science. 163 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:10,160 It's like you can study it, you can give attention to it because 164 00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:12,480 the opposite is like, you don't make any sense. 165 00:09:13,200 --> 00:09:17,080 Yes, they do in their own mind, in their own ways, just 166 00:09:17,080 --> 00:09:18,480 different than what we think about. 167 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:21,760 It's a different way of thinking and it is reasonable. 168 00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:24,600 And so we need to have understanding with them. 169 00:09:25,400 --> 00:09:28,880 We need to show understanding because sometimes I can talk to 170 00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:32,400 Taylor like I'm listening to you, but you just don't make any 171 00:09:32,400 --> 00:09:35,160 sense. There's a vibe you can give off 172 00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:41,240 to someone in conversation like or you can give them the sense 173 00:09:41,240 --> 00:09:43,160 that I'm I'm hearing you, I'm listening to you. 174 00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:46,960 I don't fully understand everything, but I'm trying. 175 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:48,880 I'm here that you're you do make sense. 176 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:52,520 If I make my wife feel like she doesn't make sense versus I'm 177 00:09:52,520 --> 00:09:54,600 just not understanding. Those are two totally different 178 00:09:54,600 --> 00:09:57,120 things. But instead, I can seek to 179 00:09:57,120 --> 00:10:01,720 understand so that she feels understood, even when we might 180 00:10:01,720 --> 00:10:03,640 not always see things exactly the same way. 181 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:07,880 What does this take? It just takes time and effort. 182 00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:11,720 We don't know everything that goes through someone else's 183 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:13,680 head. It takes time and effort to 184 00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:16,520 understand their disposition, to understand their reactions to 185 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:19,280 things. And if we will just take this 186 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:22,880 line, dwell with them with understanding, this will solve 187 00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:27,120 90% of marriage string. 90% of problems is just let's stick 188 00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:28,640 through it. Let let me just try to 189 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:30,400 understand. Let me, let me be here with you 190 00:10:30,400 --> 00:10:33,880 and not leave, not storm out of the house or storm into the 191 00:10:33,880 --> 00:10:37,960 other room all the time. That was solved 90% of our 192 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:42,480 problems right there. But he goes on to say even more 193 00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:43,840 details that'll help us understand. 194 00:10:43,840 --> 00:10:45,400 This is just the second-half of the verse. 195 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:50,240 He says dwelling with them, with understanding, giving honour to 196 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:52,880 the wife as to the weaker vessel. 197 00:10:53,120 --> 00:10:56,440 So our instruction, kind of like every other relationship, he 198 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:58,800 said, is there's a side of submission and there's a side of 199 00:10:58,800 --> 00:11:01,440 honour. We must honour the wife. 200 00:11:02,680 --> 00:11:05,480 Does that mean, like we already said with, with our bosses, that 201 00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:09,560 small portion of people who are worthy or the times when people 202 00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:11,560 are worthy? No, it's weird to give on 203 00:11:11,560 --> 00:11:15,200 regardless of the circumstances because often times one, the 204 00:11:15,200 --> 00:11:17,080 husband and wife will say, well, I'm not doing this because 205 00:11:17,080 --> 00:11:18,560 they're not doing this. And then this one says, I'm not 206 00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:19,720 doing that because you're not doing that. 207 00:11:20,400 --> 00:11:23,360 There's no circle. You can't escape the circle of 208 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:25,200 them. Somebody has to start. 209 00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:29,960 And God's pattern is you do your side and you take care of your 210 00:11:30,080 --> 00:11:32,040 business. I God will take care of the 211 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:34,200 rest. It is not our responsibility to 212 00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:39,160 handle anyone else's side of any relationship, especially not the 213 00:11:39,160 --> 00:11:42,840 marriage woman. We are to show honour. 214 00:11:43,440 --> 00:11:46,280 That's as this concept is going to blow up here as these verses 215 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:47,400 proceed. So stay with it. 216 00:11:48,480 --> 00:11:53,240 Showing honour doesn't mean being nice to them or just just 217 00:11:53,240 --> 00:11:56,720 don't abuse them or don't harass them. 218 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,560 It means to honour and respect them. 219 00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:06,600 Fathers in this audience who have daughters, do you want your 220 00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:08,760 daughter to be treated the way you treat your wife? 221 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:12,840 Because we don't want our daughters just to be not abused. 222 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:15,400 We want our daughters to be honoured. 223 00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:21,200 How about this? These are the daughters of the 224 00:12:21,280 --> 00:12:25,800 heavenly King of this world. God is looking down on them and 225 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:29,760 wants them to be honoured. We have a responsibility not to 226 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:34,760 just be nice to Him, but to honor them in a special way. 227 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:41,000 Why, it's going to get even more in our face here as we go, he 228 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:47,600 says, as to the weaker vessel. Now, there's no scripture that 229 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:51,520 says women are weaker than men or that says women are inferior 230 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:53,720 to men. This is not inferiority. 231 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:57,600 This is not inferiority. But let's talk about the context 232 00:12:57,600 --> 00:12:59,120 of what he's already talking about. 233 00:12:59,480 --> 00:13:03,160 He's already talked about how women have the responsibility to 234 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:08,200 surrender themselves to physical, emotional, social, 235 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:10,720 especially during that time they were vulnerable in their society 236 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:14,080 they lived in. So physical, emotional, social 237 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:18,600 and authoritative vulnerability to the men, to their husbands. 238 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:21,400 Not not all women, to all men. It's not that it's wife to 239 00:13:21,400 --> 00:13:25,160 husband. Women have this instruction to 240 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:31,760 surrender invulnerability and we had better honour them in that 241 00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:34,800 vulnerability. That's the point he's making. 242 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:37,960 When they were designed, like we said last time, to be their most 243 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:42,240 God-given purpose when they are serving and taking care of 244 00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:45,760 others and putting others above themselves and taking care of 245 00:13:45,760 --> 00:13:50,480 the needs of others. Genesis tells, tells us that God 246 00:13:50,480 --> 00:13:53,640 created woman as a helper for man to support and to 247 00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:55,680 strengthen. And you know what happens with 248 00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:58,240 that? God gave women these chemicals 249 00:13:58,240 --> 00:14:01,480 in their brain. Estrogen is a chemical of 250 00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:07,760 compassion and empathy and care, especially for children. 251 00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:10,920 Taylor's been having a hard time because Daisy won't stop crying. 252 00:14:10,920 --> 00:14:12,920 But there's points where she, like, can't control. 253 00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:14,560 It's just her hormones make her cry. 254 00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:17,920 I don't have that. I can sit there and put earplugs 255 00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:19,600 in and just bounce her through it. 256 00:14:19,600 --> 00:14:22,200 And now it's, it's hard. It's, it's loud, but I don't 257 00:14:22,200 --> 00:14:24,200 have the same chemicals in my brain that she does. 258 00:14:24,680 --> 00:14:29,680 And so if the women are called to surrender, submit and and 259 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:33,960 serve, and God gave them this disposition that that makes them 260 00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:37,720 vulnerable because they love so much they want to do that. 261 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:43,880 We had better honour them in that because if we in turn abuse 262 00:14:43,880 --> 00:14:49,040 that submission, that submissive dynamic, May God have mercy on 263 00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:52,360 our souls because it is not a position we need to be in. 264 00:14:53,680 --> 00:14:57,440 God is telling us to honour them, as do we have no more 265 00:14:57,440 --> 00:15:01,400 context for a weaker vessel. Now to the one who is tender. 266 00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:04,720 That word weaker, we're going to see in a minute might actually 267 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:07,280 have more behind it than we typically think of. 268 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:13,400 But women have to submit themselves to a sensitivity that 269 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:18,600 we as men are often hardened to, and that is putting yourself in 270 00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:24,360 a position of weakness to serve. May we honour them in that. 271 00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:28,280 And God, presiding over all of this thing, wants us to 272 00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:32,240 delicately handle them with the care that He has placed 273 00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:37,360 something that is gentle in our hands, that we would not crush 274 00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:42,200 it, that we would not abuse it because oh man, it can go so 275 00:15:42,200 --> 00:15:45,920 wrong. Half the songs ever written are 276 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:50,120 from women passionately berating men who have been unfaithful, 277 00:15:50,120 --> 00:15:53,360 who have been unkind and rude and domineering. 278 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:58,920 Rightfully so. There's a huge way this can go 279 00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:03,720 bad quickly if we are not careful to honour our wives. 280 00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:08,720 OK, so we settled that context. We had to put a lot of words in 281 00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:12,240 the context to make sure we know he's not just saying hey honour, 282 00:16:12,240 --> 00:16:15,640 Hershey's weaker than you. So is there a, is there a way 283 00:16:15,640 --> 00:16:18,680 that maybe this could have been translated better to make us see 284 00:16:18,680 --> 00:16:25,480 more of the context? The phrase weaker vessel, some 285 00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:30,840 commentators say, actually goes back to their dishes they used 286 00:16:30,840 --> 00:16:35,400 to use in their dishware. They had common dishes just like 287 00:16:35,400 --> 00:16:38,880 we do, and they had some dishes that were more delicate. 288 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:43,480 We call that fine China. And when we pull out the fine 289 00:16:43,480 --> 00:16:46,080 China, you don't throw them in the sink like you do the plastic 290 00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:48,640 Ware. You don't toss them in the sink. 291 00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:51,080 You don't throw them around the kitchen with that, with that 292 00:16:51,080 --> 00:16:53,200 fine China you treated as special. 293 00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:57,320 And you have to be gentle with it because it's precious. 294 00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:01,160 And there are commentators that say this is a better translation 295 00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:04,680 of the phrase weaker vessel. Now whether that was literally 296 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:08,079 what the author was intending or not, it carries the meaning that 297 00:17:08,079 --> 00:17:10,640 the whole passage was was building up for us. 298 00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:14,560 Then the dynamic of women the husband and wife needs to carry 299 00:17:14,560 --> 00:17:16,880 anyway. Whether this was his 300 00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,520 translation, a better translation or not, it carries 301 00:17:19,520 --> 00:17:23,839 the idea better that we can fully understand the concept of 302 00:17:23,839 --> 00:17:27,200 fine China. God is saying I have created 303 00:17:27,200 --> 00:17:32,600 this dynamic in which these beautiful realities exist and 304 00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:37,440 you can't toss them around. Why cheaper dishes are used and 305 00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:41,120 abused as tools. They're just something to get 306 00:17:41,120 --> 00:17:44,120 stuff on the kids plate and get it in their down their throats. 307 00:17:46,040 --> 00:17:50,760 Cheaper dishes are used and abused as tools #2 China is 308 00:17:50,760 --> 00:17:54,560 precious though, and special and it's beautiful. 309 00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:57,800 And we handle China with special care. 310 00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:59,720 Why? We realize it's a value. 311 00:18:02,160 --> 00:18:03,680 How does that parallel the wives? 312 00:18:03,680 --> 00:18:08,080 Wives don't want to be another task used and abused as tools. 313 00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:11,160 They don't want us to come home from work and see them as just 314 00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:13,680 another box to check or a task to complete. 315 00:18:14,680 --> 00:18:20,560 They want to be treated as precious and special and 316 00:18:20,560 --> 00:18:24,120 beautiful and God put that in them and God wants that too. 317 00:18:26,120 --> 00:18:29,920 Wives want to receive special care and to be valued just like 318 00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:31,280 China does. Fine China. 319 00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:41,640 We are to give honour to the wife and whenever special 320 00:18:41,640 --> 00:18:44,760 authority is given, special accountability is always given, 321 00:18:46,840 --> 00:18:48,880 he says. Giving honor to the wife as to 322 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:53,760 the weaker vessel and as being heirs together of the grace of 323 00:18:53,760 --> 00:18:56,360 life. If the previous build up didn't 324 00:18:56,480 --> 00:19:01,600 help clarify it enough, he says. We are to look at this as we are 325 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:04,880 heirs together. Part of this is of the grace. 326 00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:09,720 Women don't have to earn our honor because God didn't. 327 00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:14,040 We didn't earn God's grace. Grace is a gift freely given 328 00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:19,120 despite or regardless of whether someone's worthy or not, and we 329 00:19:19,120 --> 00:19:24,040 together are heirs with them, One man said This reminds 330 00:19:24,040 --> 00:19:27,280 husbands that even though they have been given great authority 331 00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:31,360 within marriage, their wives are still equal to them in spiritual 332 00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:33,800 privilege and eternal importance. 333 00:19:34,200 --> 00:19:39,880 They are joint heirs, and if men ever start to look at themselves 334 00:19:40,640 --> 00:19:43,280 like this isn't the case, they have missed the whole picture. 335 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:48,160 And the Heavenly Father looks at these daughters of his with 336 00:19:48,160 --> 00:19:52,360 special importance because they are heirs just as much as we are 337 00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:58,720 of the grace that is coming to us, of the grace of life that 338 00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:00,720 God has given us. And some people take this to 339 00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:03,560 mean even more specific. There's graces and blessings in 340 00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:06,360 the marriage relationship that we get to be heirs together of. 341 00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:10,440 Sure, absolutely. But even more so God's 342 00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:16,840 inheritance and his grace he's given us to given to us Because 343 00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:21,040 of that, we should keep our minds in check. 344 00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:24,640 We happened. By you might say a flip of the 345 00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:26,440 coin, we could have been male or female. 346 00:20:26,440 --> 00:20:29,760 We we were male. So maybe you do not think that 347 00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:31,480 we're better because of that in any way. 348 00:20:36,000 --> 00:20:38,600 The feminist movement in our country and maybe even around 349 00:20:38,600 --> 00:20:40,240 the world has caused a lot of damage. 350 00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:44,680 It is undermined, as we talked about before, women's best 351 00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:50,160 qualities, but it's in response to a lot of chauvinism that 352 00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:53,960 existed where men were at the head of everything in the sense 353 00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:57,000 that they were better. They were they were domineering, 354 00:20:57,120 --> 00:21:01,560 they were often times abusive. And so it's often a response to 355 00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:03,760 something else that creates another problem. 356 00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:06,400 And we can never, the extremes don't work. 357 00:21:07,160 --> 00:21:10,360 Women are not better and and everything, the men and men are 358 00:21:10,360 --> 00:21:12,920 not better than women. And these two ideas are so 359 00:21:12,920 --> 00:21:15,600 divisive and so wrong on many levels. 360 00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:21,880 We are heirs together, so it says as being heirs together of 361 00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:25,480 the grace of life that your prayers may not be hindered. 362 00:21:26,120 --> 00:21:29,040 So we need to be careful as husbands, how do we treat our 363 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:32,360 wives because our prayers, our prayers can be hindered. 364 00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:35,800 You mean God's not going to listen to me if I don't treat my 365 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:38,440 wife right? And I used to think and when I 366 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:41,120 first got married, I was like, man, I got that's shocking. 367 00:21:41,120 --> 00:21:43,440 I got to be careful. He didn't say that a lot of 368 00:21:43,440 --> 00:21:45,480 times about different things, does he? 369 00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:48,880 That seems like a like a big rule. 370 00:21:49,320 --> 00:21:50,960 I need to watch out now that I'm a husband. 371 00:21:52,160 --> 00:21:53,640 This shouldn't be a surprise to me though. 372 00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:57,040 Why? Because God often turns us 373 00:21:57,040 --> 00:21:59,160 toward each other and says, you want to talk to me? 374 00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:03,080 Work stuff out with these people first before you put your gifts 375 00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:04,840 at the altar. Make it right with your 376 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:10,240 brethren, he says. He says in the parable of the of 377 00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:15,280 the unforgiving servant, this man was, was forgiven a debt by 378 00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:17,960 his by his master. There's a greatest debt that 379 00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:20,680 anyone could ever imagine. And he was forgiven that debt. 380 00:22:20,680 --> 00:22:23,080 And then he turned right around and he went to some other guy 381 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:25,480 that owed him very little comparatively. 382 00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:29,160 And he showed judgement on him. And he was, he was rude to that 383 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:30,760 man. And he said, you're going to pay 384 00:22:30,760 --> 00:22:34,240 what you owe. And that Master said seriously, 385 00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:38,480 I forgave you all this. No, you're going to go, you're 386 00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,600 going to pay now. I forgave that debt, but I'm 387 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:42,560 going to put all that debt back on your shoulders. 388 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:46,840 What's the principle? If we are not treating people 389 00:22:46,840 --> 00:22:49,760 each other a certain way, God's going to say no, no, don't talk 390 00:22:49,760 --> 00:22:51,600 to me yet. You work it out with each other 391 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:54,520 first and you handle that dynamic that is right in front 392 00:22:54,520 --> 00:22:58,640 of you first. So why should I not be surprised 393 00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:04,880 if I as a husband and distant and unloving and not dwelling my 394 00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:10,720 with my wife with understanding God's not going to listen to me? 395 00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:15,120 If I'm not going to be that way to someone who I have authority 396 00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:17,280 over? Why in the world would he listen 397 00:23:17,280 --> 00:23:18,800 to someone he has authority over me? 398 00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:25,520 Why is he going to listen to me, a man who wants to be distant 399 00:23:25,520 --> 00:23:28,720 and uninvolved and not loving his wife and understanding her? 400 00:23:29,280 --> 00:23:31,680 This prayer is not going to go any higher than the ceiling, you 401 00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:37,640 might say, but a man that will dwell patiently and dwell with 402 00:23:37,640 --> 00:23:40,920 understanding and love. When that man hits his knees in 403 00:23:40,920 --> 00:23:47,440 prayer, God will hear because he's handling his dynamics with 404 00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:50,560 grace. And that's where God says, OK, 405 00:23:51,080 --> 00:23:54,920 now you understand, now you understand grace. 406 00:23:56,640 --> 00:23:58,920 It should be no surprise that our prayers will be hindered 407 00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:04,480 because that's how dynamics work in the Kingdom, he says. 408 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:07,320 Finally, all of you. Who? 409 00:24:07,760 --> 00:24:09,840 All of you. So now he's been talking about 410 00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:14,160 all of us, all these categories, but now he's making a broad set 411 00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:15,760 of instructions, says all of you. 412 00:24:16,320 --> 00:24:19,840 Be of one mind, having compassion for one another. 413 00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:23,120 Love as brothers, be tender hearted, be courteous. 414 00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:26,440 Doesn't this sound like a summary of everything he's told 415 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:29,080 the husbands and wives in the marriage relationship? 416 00:24:32,040 --> 00:24:33,440 I think it does. Why? 417 00:24:35,120 --> 00:24:37,920 Because marriage is really an arena. 418 00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:41,040 I'm kind of taking a step back now. 419 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:44,120 I said we're stepping into all of us, but it for those who are 420 00:24:44,120 --> 00:24:46,480 married and and we're going to connect it now to the people who 421 00:24:46,480 --> 00:24:50,080 are unmarried. Still, all these concepts and 422 00:24:50,080 --> 00:24:54,480 skills are is it's arena to practice in a close environment. 423 00:24:54,680 --> 00:24:56,800 The concepts that we should be practicing everywhere. 424 00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,920 We take these instructions from God, and we have to learn to 425 00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:04,920 work those out in a very close dynamic, and we work closely 426 00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:08,360 together all the time. It can get tense, and so 427 00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:11,880 bitterness can develop easily. And it's hard to have patience. 428 00:25:11,880 --> 00:25:15,040 It's hard to have love. It's hard to be understanding in 429 00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:17,720 that arena where you're going to practice all the time. 430 00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:21,520 And so marriage is an arena where the consequences of our 431 00:25:21,520 --> 00:25:26,560 actions, our heart are quickly exposed. 432 00:25:26,920 --> 00:25:30,240 It's a place where the blessings of how a good relationship can 433 00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:33,120 function. Marriage is a is a arena where 434 00:25:33,120 --> 00:25:37,240 we can see the blessings quickly grow from because we can see all 435 00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,680 the blessings of a good marriage as things work together. 436 00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:43,480 And it shows us that we can just figure it out. 437 00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:49,120 We can work through it. Marriage is an arena where your 438 00:25:49,120 --> 00:25:53,280 habits in your heart reach a swift conclusion because of the 439 00:25:53,280 --> 00:25:55,480 closeness and frequency of interaction. 440 00:25:55,800 --> 00:25:58,280 You know, there's a lot of interactions where if I am 441 00:25:58,280 --> 00:26:00,960 unkind a little bit here, a little bit over there, I never 442 00:26:00,960 --> 00:26:04,000 see the real impact of those in my face. 443 00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:07,600 Sometimes I never see the impact of my heart. 444 00:26:07,600 --> 00:26:11,040 When it's hard and unkind, sometimes it it reaches somebody 445 00:26:11,040 --> 00:26:12,360 out there and I never see it again. 446 00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:16,840 But in a marriage, it bounces right back at you and you see it 447 00:26:16,840 --> 00:26:19,320 immediately. Marriage is an arena where we 448 00:26:19,320 --> 00:26:23,440 see these Christian principles. It's like speed up. 449 00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:27,040 It's like the process is is expedited and you can see where 450 00:26:27,040 --> 00:26:30,680 they bear more fruit rapidly, where they bear fruit more 451 00:26:30,680 --> 00:26:32,520 rapidly and you can taste their effects. 452 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:36,680 So I can see if my marriage is not going well, it's probably 453 00:26:36,680 --> 00:26:38,840 because my heart has a lot of wrong in it. 454 00:26:38,840 --> 00:26:40,240 My actions have a lot of wrong in it. 455 00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:43,320 And I can see it grow up in front of me and say, OK, that's 456 00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:45,880 the fruit of my marriage. That's the fruit of my heart and 457 00:26:45,880 --> 00:26:49,440 my actions concert on the on the opposite effect. 458 00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,280 If you're handing your your relationship in that close 459 00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:55,280 interaction with love and kindness and gentleness and 460 00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:58,760 mercy and leadership, you're going to see the fruits of that 461 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,120 grub right in front of you and say, OK, something is going 462 00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:03,280 right. I can see the blessings. 463 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:07,240 I can see the consequences. I can see it all work out right 464 00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:11,160 here in front of me. My point is these concepts go to 465 00:27:11,160 --> 00:27:16,000 all of us Married people have the benefit and sometimes the 466 00:27:16,160 --> 00:27:18,800 consequence of seeing it come right back at you quicker. 467 00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:24,000 But we all have to learn how to submit and some how to show love 468 00:27:24,000 --> 00:27:36,600 and honor and grace. As he instructs, keep skipping 469 00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:39,440 the slide. I want to be on for us to have 470 00:27:39,440 --> 00:27:42,800 compassion for us to love and be tender hearted. 471 00:27:42,800 --> 00:27:46,280 But you know, what if if you feel like you're a little bit 472 00:27:46,280 --> 00:27:50,160 left out on that, we have an arena just like marriage might 473 00:27:50,160 --> 00:27:51,440 be a little bit more closely knit. 474 00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:55,640 We have an arena to work on that as well in a way that you're 475 00:27:55,640 --> 00:27:59,160 going to see and come right back at you where the fruits of your 476 00:27:59,160 --> 00:28:00,840 heart and your actions come right back to you. 477 00:28:01,080 --> 00:28:05,680 The church is an arena for your heart and your actions to come 478 00:28:05,680 --> 00:28:09,200 right back at you and see, what are my dynamics like here? 479 00:28:10,240 --> 00:28:12,440 What are your relationships like with the people in this 480 00:28:12,480 --> 00:28:16,600 building? Because your heart is probably 481 00:28:16,600 --> 00:28:20,080 going to result in the action in the in the dynamic at church. 482 00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:24,000 Are you distant, cold. You probably don't have very 483 00:28:24,160 --> 00:28:27,480 tight relationships here. Are you uninvolved? 484 00:28:27,840 --> 00:28:29,120 You probably don't feel variable. 485 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:33,880 Are you loving and building and cultivating relationships? 486 00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:35,400 You're probably going to get that back. 487 00:28:36,320 --> 00:28:40,200 It's an arena for us to try out and to practice the Christian 488 00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:44,880 virtues and to see you come to fruition, to see beautiful 489 00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:49,280 fruits of love and kindness and mercy grow together right in 490 00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:53,120 front of us. In this room, we have a chance 491 00:28:53,400 --> 00:28:59,120 to grow something special. But it's hard because at church 492 00:28:59,120 --> 00:29:02,120 is where people's greatest hopes and dreams rest. 493 00:29:03,240 --> 00:29:05,400 Many people in this room, their greatest hopes and dreams are 494 00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:07,720 here, but your greatest concerns are here. 495 00:29:07,960 --> 00:29:09,520 There's people who are worried about the health of this 496 00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:11,280 congregation. What's going to happen in 20 and 497 00:29:11,280 --> 00:29:15,040 30 and 40 years? So people's greatest worries are 498 00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:18,280 here, too. That creates tension sometimes. 499 00:29:18,960 --> 00:29:21,760 This is the core of all truth of our lives here. 500 00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:24,040 It's going to cause some tension, right? 501 00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:28,040 It's where we hopefully spend a lot of time. 502 00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:31,520 It's where we build our identity here. 503 00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:33,640 This is where we are hopefully vulnerable. 504 00:29:34,680 --> 00:29:36,680 If you're not vulnerable, you're probably not building a strong 505 00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:40,680 relationship in this place, and it's where you put your money. 506 00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:46,560 This is a recipe for a lot of attention, a lot of challenges, 507 00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:49,840 but that means it's a place for us to grow a lot. 508 00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:54,160 It's an arena for practice, for a lot of really good practice. 509 00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:02,440 And so do you have people here that you are bitter towards? 510 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:08,640 He says here, finally, all of you be of one mind. 511 00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:11,800 So he's telling all of us to be of one mind. 512 00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:16,280 That means that I cannot approach my spiritual life with 513 00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:19,200 this mentality that some people approach it with where I'm going 514 00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:21,760 to figure out my spiritual life. And I'm going to go on this 515 00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:24,160 journey by myself and I'm going to come back and be with 516 00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:25,760 everybody. Once I come back, once I'm done. 517 00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:28,920 That's not that's not how God ever instructs us. 518 00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:33,960 We are supposed to be working together and have it a other 519 00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,840 centered mindset as we grow in Christ. 520 00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:40,360 The great myth of going and figuring things out and coming 521 00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:43,400 back when I'm done. It's often a powerful people get 522 00:30:43,400 --> 00:30:47,000 lost, confused. It's a place where people get 523 00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:50,000 influenced by other things instead of being influenced by 524 00:30:50,000 --> 00:30:52,520 good people around them. And you know what? 525 00:30:52,520 --> 00:30:59,160 If we can't find peace in the searching and the growing and 526 00:30:59,160 --> 00:31:02,920 the grind, that's an issue in our heart. 527 00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:05,760 And as much as we want to blame it on other people who might be 528 00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:10,680 unkind to us, it's our fault. They're sure there are people 529 00:31:10,800 --> 00:31:12,640 who might not be the kindest to us. 530 00:31:12,640 --> 00:31:15,680 But we are responsible for our spiritual heart, for our 531 00:31:15,680 --> 00:31:20,600 spiritual life. And we probably need to work on 532 00:31:20,600 --> 00:31:24,520 finding peace so that we can share this journey with our 533 00:31:24,520 --> 00:31:29,320 brethren, so that we can work together and be of one mind. 534 00:31:29,960 --> 00:31:32,680 Are we on the same page? Do we all share the same 535 00:31:32,680 --> 00:31:35,600 aspirations and hopes and coming goals? 536 00:31:35,840 --> 00:31:37,560 Do we share life's challenges together? 537 00:31:40,240 --> 00:31:43,880 That's what it means. That one mind doesn't mean we 538 00:31:43,880 --> 00:31:45,760 have to think exactly the same on every little thing, because 539 00:31:45,760 --> 00:31:50,240 that's impossible. But we can be unified, he says, 540 00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:52,080 having compassion for one another. 541 00:31:53,680 --> 00:31:56,000 Love his brothers and be tender, tender hearted. 542 00:31:56,200 --> 00:32:00,160 Are there people here that you don't give a lick about? 543 00:32:01,240 --> 00:32:03,840 Are there people here that you have had it with and you're done 544 00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:06,560 with and you'd rather just totally forget about? 545 00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:12,040 There are times when when the Bible does say to just to just 546 00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,040 ignore people because they're going to cause problems. 547 00:32:14,040 --> 00:32:19,040 But just like Jesus did, he's going to tell us a minute, but 548 00:32:19,080 --> 00:32:20,840 Jesus turned around and blessed those people. 549 00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:23,160 Jesus didn't completely block him out and say forget you, I'm 550 00:32:23,160 --> 00:32:26,680 done with you. He had mercy on me and he 551 00:32:26,680 --> 00:32:30,280 returned a blessing and we need to be tender hearted. 552 00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:33,680 If I'm hard hearted toward other people here, I'm not following 553 00:32:33,680 --> 00:32:35,840 this command to be tender toward people. 554 00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:40,960 I'm commanded to choose tender heartedness to where if I think 555 00:32:40,960 --> 00:32:43,240 about someone in this room that I'm hardened towards, I'm done 556 00:32:43,240 --> 00:32:44,400 with them. I'm just tired of them. 557 00:32:45,320 --> 00:32:49,160 I have to choose to not have that mindset toward them, to be 558 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:51,280 tender instead. What does tender mean? 559 00:32:51,480 --> 00:32:54,440 It means I am easily affected by them. 560 00:32:57,160 --> 00:32:59,400 Like if something happens to them, I have concern for them. 561 00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:04,240 Maybe I'm praying for them. If they're bitter, then I say, 562 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:05,560 God, please give them strength there. 563 00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:11,440 They struggle with bitterness. If they're unkind, God, please 564 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:13,560 help them because maybe it's a struggle for them. 565 00:33:19,800 --> 00:33:24,160 Do you just show up and get out? Being here is great, but you 566 00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:27,240 can't be tender hearted toward people and be totally uninvolved 567 00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:32,600 in their life. This is a command from God. 568 00:33:32,600 --> 00:33:34,760 This isn't like a yeah, if you want to, here's some stuff 569 00:33:34,760 --> 00:33:40,760 that's good for Christians. We have to be easily affected by 570 00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:46,200 people, our brothers. He says, not returning evil for 571 00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:49,520 evil or reviling for reviling, but On the contrary, blessing, 572 00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:52,040 knowing that you were called to this. 573 00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:53,800 He keeps coming back to that phrase. 574 00:33:53,800 --> 00:33:55,280 He's like, this is what it's all about. 575 00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:58,800 If it's hard, he's like, yeah, that's that's why we're here to 576 00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:01,000 grow. So you don't actually stay the 577 00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:02,120 same. You always work. 578 00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:04,440 If you always do what you always did, you're always going to get 579 00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:07,000 what you always got. But On the contrary, we want to 580 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,440 turn and bless that is Jesus quality work. 581 00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:12,159 That's now we're getting into the good stuff. 582 00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:16,360 And if you have trouble reviling or returning these things here, 583 00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:20,560 maybe here's some steps. If people revile you or unkind 584 00:34:20,560 --> 00:34:22,800 towards you, maybe start with a breath. 585 00:34:25,159 --> 00:34:26,920 Someone says something rude to you? 586 00:34:29,199 --> 00:34:31,800 Taking a breath sets the tone for the conversation. 587 00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:34,760 I'm not going to fly off the handle at you. 588 00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:38,000 I'm going to handle myself with calmness. 589 00:34:38,320 --> 00:34:41,320 It sets the tone without ever having anything good to say. 590 00:34:42,719 --> 00:34:45,159 Oxygen clears the mind and relaxes the nerves. 591 00:34:45,760 --> 00:34:49,199 That's number one. Take a breath #2 use silence. 592 00:34:50,679 --> 00:34:54,719 If somebody says something rude to you, you can just use 593 00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:57,840 silence. That's where people feel dumb 594 00:34:58,760 --> 00:35:01,520 when you say something that's off the wall. 595 00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:03,440 When you use silence, guess what it does? 596 00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:07,040 It allows the person's words to hang in the air, and then they 597 00:35:07,040 --> 00:35:10,560 start to smell. But if you respond and you throw 598 00:35:10,560 --> 00:35:12,280 some other words in the air, now they're thinking about what you 599 00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:13,920 said. But if you just let the words 600 00:35:13,920 --> 00:35:19,360 they said hang in the air, that's all there is to think 601 00:35:19,360 --> 00:35:22,160 about and they start to realize what they just said. 602 00:35:25,800 --> 00:35:28,920 And maybe you can follow that up with asking a question that 603 00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:32,000 shows them a mirror. Were you hoping to embarrass me 604 00:35:33,560 --> 00:35:35,400 by saying that? It's not. 605 00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:38,600 It's not reactive. It's just what's your goal by 606 00:35:38,600 --> 00:35:41,480 saying that? That's going to completely 607 00:35:41,480 --> 00:35:44,640 disarm them if they try to then throw another punch. 608 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,280 Remember, not not physically, but maybe verbally. 609 00:35:49,080 --> 00:35:52,800 You silence, don't swing. When I was a pitcher, if I could 610 00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:56,800 get somebody on in the batter's box swinging everything I threw, 611 00:35:57,160 --> 00:36:00,600 man, I was, I was living because I could put a ball on the inside 612 00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:02,280 corner that I can throw, hide outside. 613 00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:05,320 And I had them swinging every which way I had them the rest of 614 00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:08,000 the game because I knew they were swinging and everything I 615 00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:11,360 threw. But you know what, the people 616 00:36:11,360 --> 00:36:14,160 who are hard to get where the people who would be patient, 617 00:36:14,480 --> 00:36:17,760 they wouldn't swing in our discussions, in our 618 00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:19,800 interactions, don't be afraid, just not swing. 619 00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:26,040 I'll throw the caveat there on #4 here. 620 00:36:29,240 --> 00:36:33,840 If you're the batter, the people that are the hardest to to avoid 621 00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:38,440 swinging at are the people who throw a lot of strikes. 622 00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:41,800 If you have a pitcher who is pounding the strike zone over 623 00:36:41,800 --> 00:36:44,880 and over and they're not missing, the umpire catches on 624 00:36:44,880 --> 00:36:46,160 it. The umpire starts calling 625 00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:48,160 strikes that don't even look like strikes. 626 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:49,360 They get the benefit of the doubt. 627 00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:52,520 And so sometimes in our interactions we can receive 628 00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:55,960 words that are off the wall rude from people who are usually on 629 00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:58,880 it, and they're usually right and they're usually wise. 630 00:36:59,560 --> 00:37:02,520 But even from those people, we need to be aware that they can 631 00:37:02,520 --> 00:37:06,760 throw wild pitches and they can be off sometimes. 632 00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:10,960 And so may we be willing to even from people who are usually 633 00:37:11,680 --> 00:37:16,120 good, reliable people, just take a breath. 634 00:37:17,040 --> 00:37:19,280 And sometimes those are the hardest people to not respond to 635 00:37:22,240 --> 00:37:25,240 because usually they're right. And then I want to respond to 636 00:37:25,240 --> 00:37:30,800 defensiveness, but may I not return reviling for reviling, 637 00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:35,000 but On the contrary, blessing, knowing that you were called to 638 00:37:35,000 --> 00:37:37,200 this, that you may inherit a blessing. 639 00:37:37,720 --> 00:37:39,560 So we are called to bless others. 640 00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:40,840 Why? So that we can inherit a 641 00:37:40,840 --> 00:37:42,760 blessing. If you can't, out of the 642 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,200 goodness of your heart towards that person, show love. 643 00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:47,280 At least show love because hey, you're going to get a blessing 644 00:37:47,280 --> 00:37:48,360 out of it. You get something out of it 645 00:37:49,720 --> 00:37:53,520 that's pretty good. But the language of calling and 646 00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:55,480 blessing, remember that goes back to Abraham. 647 00:37:56,040 --> 00:37:58,240 God called out. We talked about this in I think 648 00:37:58,240 --> 00:38:00,280 the second lesson. God called people out and gave 649 00:38:00,280 --> 00:38:02,400 them a purpose and said I will bless you. 650 00:38:03,560 --> 00:38:07,320 God called Abraham and he called the children of Israel to that I 651 00:38:07,320 --> 00:38:09,120 will bless you, make you a great nation. 652 00:38:09,520 --> 00:38:12,160 That same blessing is being pronounced on us as Christians, 653 00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:15,640 the same Abrahamic blessing of a covenant promise. 654 00:38:16,320 --> 00:38:20,200 It's being carried into simple actions like this, like 655 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:23,080 suffering, but in return blessing. 656 00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:25,880 We will be the blessed, the calm of God. 657 00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:30,120 That's pretty cool. It's always been God's plan. 658 00:38:30,120 --> 00:38:32,360 He wants to call people and give them a blessing. 659 00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:39,080 Then he goes on to say verse 10 for this is a quote from Psalm 660 00:38:39,080 --> 00:38:44,680 34 that uses for he who would love life and see good days, Let 661 00:38:44,680 --> 00:38:47,760 him refrain his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking to 662 00:38:47,760 --> 00:38:49,080 see. See this goes back to the Old 663 00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:50,280 Testament. It's nothing new. 664 00:38:51,600 --> 00:38:54,440 Let him still steal the quote from Psalm 34. 665 00:38:54,560 --> 00:38:58,240 Let him turn away from evil and do good. 666 00:38:59,760 --> 00:39:02,960 You know, sometimes we make it so much harder on ourselves and 667 00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:04,640 so much more complicated than it needs to be. 668 00:39:06,000 --> 00:39:08,440 It's simple, turn away from evil and do good. 669 00:39:10,240 --> 00:39:12,840 But we can overcomplicate it to the point that because of our 670 00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:16,880 own bitterness, because of our own judgmental nature, instead 671 00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:20,480 of being gracious because of our own judgmental nature, we can 672 00:39:20,480 --> 00:39:22,880 make it like it's trudging through mud to get ourselves to 673 00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:25,360 be kind to someone. Because we've got this so much 674 00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:30,040 mental baggage of our anger or frustration towards them that we 675 00:39:30,040 --> 00:39:36,080 can't hardly squeak out a kind remark, but instead turn away 676 00:39:36,080 --> 00:39:39,320 from that. God wants us to live free and 677 00:39:39,320 --> 00:39:42,560 peaceful and light hearted. And the more we carry those 678 00:39:42,840 --> 00:39:45,800 bitternesses, it's going to be exhausting. 679 00:39:46,880 --> 00:39:50,160 And it becomes impossible to live the Christian life with joy 680 00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:53,680 when you're carrying things, trying to muscle up a kind 681 00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:57,320 hello. We're a positive attitude and 682 00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:04,040 maybe turn away and run with the light, spirit and the freedom. 683 00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:09,160 Still continuing in the Psalm, it says let him seek peace and 684 00:40:09,160 --> 00:40:13,640 pursue it. Let him seek him and pursue it. 685 00:40:14,320 --> 00:40:16,680 Seek peace and pursue it. When I think of seek, I think I 686 00:40:16,680 --> 00:40:19,600 have to look for something. I got to try to find it. 687 00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:24,360 When I think of pursuing, once I may have found it, I got to go 688 00:40:24,360 --> 00:40:27,320 after it and hide and seek. You had to look for something 689 00:40:27,320 --> 00:40:31,440 and then they took off running and I got to chase the process 690 00:40:31,480 --> 00:40:34,560 of achieving peace with others. We're going to see in a minute 691 00:40:34,560 --> 00:40:38,640 even internally involves some looking, involves some 692 00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:42,280 searching, and then involves some running a lot of work 693 00:40:42,280 --> 00:40:46,240 sometimes. And he's given us the map to 694 00:40:46,240 --> 00:40:48,280 peace. He's already told us have peace 695 00:40:48,280 --> 00:40:50,880 with the government, have peace with the employers, have peace 696 00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:52,200 in the home. We covered in the beginning of 697 00:40:52,200 --> 00:40:55,680 this lesson in previous have peace in the church, have peace. 698 00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:59,080 He already said even with all men, as much as you're able with 699 00:40:59,080 --> 00:41:05,600 all men, pursue peace, but even pursue peace on the inside, 700 00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:08,720 pursue peace in all areas of life. 701 00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:11,080 God wants this. Like Frank said, Jesus is the 702 00:41:11,080 --> 00:41:13,600 bringer of peace. He wants us in every area of our 703 00:41:13,600 --> 00:41:21,680 being in our in our interaction. If you lack peace in your mind, 704 00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:24,640 it takes some seeking into pursuing, just like with 705 00:41:24,640 --> 00:41:28,640 relationships. And if you don't have it, seek 706 00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:31,760 counsel. But we don't seek counsel. 707 00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:34,240 Why? Sure, it can be sometimes 708 00:41:34,240 --> 00:41:36,880 embarrassing, but yeah, I don't think that's completely why. 709 00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:39,440 I think we don't seek counsel because that's we know when we 710 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:43,560 know the work begins because we know truly it's not going to be 711 00:41:44,240 --> 00:41:46,360 a comment they make. This could be on give us peace. 712 00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:51,960 That's when the work begins, when we know what's right and 713 00:41:51,960 --> 00:41:54,440 what we needed to do to find peace. 714 00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:57,880 And ultimately, all glory goes back to God. 715 00:41:57,880 --> 00:42:01,400 No matter what work it takes on our part, God can use tools to 716 00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:05,920 bring us peace. But remember, when Jesus went to 717 00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:09,960 the man at the pool of Bethesda, the first thing he asked him 718 00:42:09,960 --> 00:42:17,640 was, do you want to be healed? Do you want to peace enough to 719 00:42:17,640 --> 00:42:19,800 go after him, to seek it and pursue it? 720 00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:25,120 Or do you want peace to be popped into your heart by a word 721 00:42:25,120 --> 00:42:32,040 someone says? May we pursue peace in all of 722 00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:34,880 these areas. For the eyes of the Lord still 723 00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:37,320 in the Psalm. For the eyes of the Lord are on 724 00:42:37,320 --> 00:42:40,880 the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayers, but the 725 00:42:40,880 --> 00:42:43,240 face of the Lord is against those who do evil. 726 00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:48,080 This is kind of a summation of all the concepts we've been 727 00:42:48,080 --> 00:42:54,160 talking about. God wants us to be righteous. 728 00:42:55,560 --> 00:42:57,240 It'll be better for us. It'll be better for our 729 00:42:57,240 --> 00:42:59,320 relationships. It'll bring us peace, it'll 730 00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:03,120 bring us joy. And he who is he who will harm 731 00:43:03,120 --> 00:43:06,920 you if you become followers of what is good, But even if you 732 00:43:06,920 --> 00:43:09,320 should suffer for righteousness sake, you are blessed. 733 00:43:10,160 --> 00:43:14,120 Now he's saying this ironically to people who had really strong 734 00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:15,920 risk, like people are being burned at the stake. 735 00:43:16,120 --> 00:43:18,160 So who is he going to? Who is he who's going to harm 736 00:43:18,160 --> 00:43:21,240 you? They probably got Nero, that guy 737 00:43:21,240 --> 00:43:24,560 who's burning people, he's who's going to harm us, but he's like, 738 00:43:24,720 --> 00:43:28,560 who's that? Who's that guy and who is he 739 00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:30,320 will harm you if you become followers of what is good. 740 00:43:30,320 --> 00:43:33,240 He didn't got nothing on you. But even if you should suffer 741 00:43:33,360 --> 00:43:35,040 for righteousness sake, you are blessed. 742 00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:38,440 You are the ones who received the Abrahamic blessing, the 743 00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:42,560 covenant blessing and do not be afraid of their threats nor be 744 00:43:42,560 --> 00:43:46,480 troubled contextually. They have literal threats for 745 00:43:46,480 --> 00:43:49,320 their life. Maybe someone would say I'm 746 00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:53,080 going to turn you in. I don't know what they would 747 00:43:53,080 --> 00:43:54,520 say, but they probably have literal threats. 748 00:43:54,720 --> 00:43:56,400 But maybe we have imagined threats. 749 00:43:57,600 --> 00:44:00,600 Maybe we are afraid of some dynamic or something happening 750 00:44:00,600 --> 00:44:03,800 in our relationships that might not be good if we are Christ 751 00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:06,720 like. Maybe those are imagined 752 00:44:06,720 --> 00:44:10,200 threats. All of those, He said they're 753 00:44:10,200 --> 00:44:14,240 nothing. Why not instead, like he said, 754 00:44:14,240 --> 00:44:20,320 live free, live with peace, and not put stock in what all these 755 00:44:20,320 --> 00:44:27,680 people might say or threaten or abuse, but instead but sanctify 756 00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:31,480 the Lord God in your hearts. You know what's going to make it 757 00:44:31,480 --> 00:44:35,000 all work. Sanctify means to set God apart. 758 00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:39,560 It means to make him holy. It means to put him on the 759 00:44:39,560 --> 00:44:43,600 throne about everything else. Only then can you do everything 760 00:44:43,600 --> 00:44:48,440 else. He can ask or instruct him that 761 00:44:48,920 --> 00:44:51,840 is going to be this, going to be the recipe that brings it all 762 00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:55,040 together. We cannot be holy. 763 00:44:55,040 --> 00:44:58,280 We cannot have God on the throne of our whole hearts while we are 764 00:44:58,280 --> 00:45:02,320 afraid of real or imagined threats to our discomfort or our 765 00:45:02,320 --> 00:45:04,800 pain. God's above that. 766 00:45:06,880 --> 00:45:11,160 We sing songs about God being on that place, putting no other 767 00:45:11,160 --> 00:45:15,360 gods before him. No other God of pain or comfort 768 00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:18,160 should sit on the throne to where we won't instead choose 769 00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:21,880 God over that. But maybe we put God in the 1st 770 00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:26,440 place and that's he's going to say some really good stuff after 771 00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:27,880 that, but we got to stop here this morning. 772 00:45:28,640 --> 00:45:30,080 He's going to say some really good things. 773 00:45:30,080 --> 00:45:34,680 If you know the rest of this verse, please come back next 774 00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:36,720 time. It's going to be a little over a 775 00:45:36,720 --> 00:45:39,600 month because I was a little earlier this time, but I'm 776 00:45:39,600 --> 00:45:41,480 looking forward to studying that and I hope you if you're not 777 00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:43,880 going to be here, we'll study that or tune into the podcast, 778 00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:47,400 whatever you need to do to hear how God can help sync. 779 00:45:47,560 --> 00:45:52,280 We can help to sanctify the Lord in our hearts and to put it in 780 00:45:52,280 --> 00:45:59,240 the first place. If you have not begun this walk. 781 00:45:59,720 --> 00:46:03,600 This is a lot of time and energy and and life figuring out how to 782 00:46:03,600 --> 00:46:05,200 do all this stuff and practicing. 783 00:46:05,560 --> 00:46:09,440 But if you haven't been saved, you need to do that first. 784 00:46:09,880 --> 00:46:12,480 The Bible lays out a simple plan and we talk about it like it's 785 00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:14,040 steps. But I don't want you to feel 786 00:46:14,040 --> 00:46:16,480 like it's a checklist. If I do this now, do this now, 787 00:46:16,480 --> 00:46:18,920 I'm done. We can get really rigid when 788 00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:20,360 we're really just trying to make it simple. 789 00:46:20,640 --> 00:46:24,320 We're trying to make sure people know clearly, like, Hey, you're, 790 00:46:24,400 --> 00:46:27,480 you're saying if you've done this, it's not a, not a 791 00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:30,840 checklist, but it's a process that happens naturally. 792 00:46:31,000 --> 00:46:34,000 It's natural for someone to hear the word and because of that, it 793 00:46:34,000 --> 00:46:37,360 produces belief in their heart. And that belief is the 794 00:46:37,360 --> 00:46:40,680 foundation for everything else that happens in our salvation. 795 00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:44,640 We have to believe enough to repent, to change our life. 796 00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:48,800 God is not really God if he is not who I'm surrendering to, 797 00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:51,240 he's not really gone in my heart. 798 00:46:51,240 --> 00:46:54,360 So I have to repent. I have to turn from my way and 799 00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:57,200 go to God's way. I have to learn submission to 800 00:46:57,200 --> 00:47:01,480 God in his ways, and I have to confess that it's not just being 801 00:47:01,480 --> 00:47:03,840 good. It's not just believing God. 802 00:47:03,840 --> 00:47:05,920 So yeah, I believe it's not just being good. 803 00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:09,680 It's not my effort. It's that Jesus is the one who 804 00:47:09,680 --> 00:47:11,280 saves. I'm going to confess that Jesus 805 00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:15,880 Christ died from my sins and he's the savior of the world. 806 00:47:16,600 --> 00:47:20,400 And I can be contacting the blood of Jesus through baptism. 807 00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:24,680 I can have my sins washed away in baptism according to Mark 808 00:47:24,680 --> 00:47:28,800 1616 and verses that are coming up and first Peter actually says 809 00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:33,240 we have this anti type that now saves A baptism where you can 810 00:47:33,240 --> 00:47:37,520 know from that day afford your sins are washed away and then 811 00:47:37,520 --> 00:47:40,320 you you live faithfully. You go on about the Christian 812 00:47:40,320 --> 00:47:45,160 walk with the faith that that takes time takes submission. 813 00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:48,040 It takes a lot of work, and if you want to begin this process 814 00:47:48,040 --> 00:47:50,320 today or if you need prayers to the church, please come while we 815 00:47:50,320 --> 00:47:51,120 stand in, while we say.