1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,760 Hello ladies and gents, Robert Sykes, Keto savage.com and today 2 00:00:02,760 --> 00:00:05,840 I've got special guest Jen and Carden and they just recently 3 00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:08,360 published a book yesterday actually at the time of this 4 00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:11,320 recording called The Secret Language of the Body. 5 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:16,120 We dive deep into the nervous system and how to optimize 6 00:00:16,160 --> 00:00:20,400 nervous system health to truly cope with any lingering 7 00:00:20,800 --> 00:00:24,840 illnesses, autoimmune issues, stiffness, ailments, joint 8 00:00:24,840 --> 00:00:26,440 discomfort, things of that nature. 9 00:00:26,760 --> 00:00:29,920 I mean really just take the focus to the nervous system as 10 00:00:29,920 --> 00:00:33,160 opposed to the mechanistic, you know, muscle or tendon or 11 00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:35,640 ligament side of things. But more so actually going to 12 00:00:35,640 --> 00:00:38,200 the core, to the brain, to the nervous system, to the vagus 13 00:00:38,200 --> 00:00:40,440 nerves, things of that nature. So very interesting 14 00:00:40,440 --> 00:00:43,600 conversation. I need to definitely do more, 15 00:00:44,360 --> 00:00:47,480 you know, self healing work myself as far as like being 16 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,520 proactive with recovery and things of that nature, actually 17 00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:52,160 relaxing breath work, stuff like that. 18 00:00:52,600 --> 00:00:54,680 So this is very insightful. I've got no doubt that you will 19 00:00:54,680 --> 00:00:57,800 take something from it so that further delay, sit back, relax, 20 00:00:57,800 --> 00:01:00,040 do the conversation with Jen and Cardin 21 00:01:10,040 --> 00:01:13,080 and we are live Jen and Cardin. How are y'all doing today? 22 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:14,680 Very well. Thank you. 23 00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:16,800 For having. US. 24 00:01:17,120 --> 00:01:19,560 Hey, glad to have you. I got to give you all Congrats 25 00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,400 because at the time of this recording, it is the 10th of 26 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:23,400 July. Y'all's book publication date 27 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:25,600 was yesterday. So congratulations on that. 28 00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,680 We'll just hit the guy running with the title of the book. 29 00:01:30,680 --> 00:01:31,960 We'll just start right off the top here. 30 00:01:31,960 --> 00:01:34,600 So the secret language of the body, how long has that been a 31 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:40,960 work in progress? So we started writing the book a 32 00:01:40,960 --> 00:01:48,360 little over, I'd say a little over a year ago, and the book 33 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:53,640 actually wasn't in the process of being written until Harper 34 00:01:53,640 --> 00:01:56,840 Collins reached out to us and asked us to write the book. 35 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:59,000 So that was really interesting and really cool. 36 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:03,360 A lot of our content was resonating, especially around 37 00:02:03,560 --> 00:02:10,440 nervous system regulation, using and sharing accessible sizes, 38 00:02:10,479 --> 00:02:14,760 vagus nerve exercises, and also just the whole nervous system 39 00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:18,520 regulation accessibility kind of videos. 40 00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:23,040 And they really resonated. And so, yeah, they asked us to 41 00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:26,200 write a book. They gave us literally 100 days. 42 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:30,920 And, you know, I'm sure we'll talk more about it, but the 43 00:02:30,920 --> 00:02:34,800 language of the body is a secret until you know and learn how to 44 00:02:34,800 --> 00:02:37,640 speak it, and then everything becomes more clear. 45 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,160 Very nice. And I, I know just in the little 46 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:43,040 bit that we were talking prior to hitting record that you've 47 00:02:43,040 --> 00:02:46,240 got experience as a professional dancer ballerina, correct? 48 00:02:47,840 --> 00:02:52,840 Yes, I was a professional ballet dancer from a very young age. 49 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:58,840 I left home to go to an Academy abroad. 50 00:02:59,880 --> 00:03:06,200 I'm from Africa, Italy, America, Germany, England mix but abroad 51 00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:13,200 means I was in Germany and I was dancing 8 to 10 hours a day. 52 00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:17,440 I would wake up at 5:00 AM, do Pilates, Feldenkreis, 53 00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:21,320 Gyrotonics, or gyrokinesis, and then we'd go into a 2 hour 54 00:03:21,320 --> 00:03:23,240 class. Then we'd go into the rest of 55 00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:24,960 the day and then, you know, at night time we'd have 56 00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:27,480 performances depending on the season. 57 00:03:27,960 --> 00:03:33,840 And I was one of those people who was often injured. 58 00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:37,840 I am hypermobile, but hypermobility doesn't 59 00:03:37,840 --> 00:03:44,000 necessarily equal injury unless you understand more of how the 60 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:49,120 nervous system governs muscles and tendon and ligaments and 61 00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:53,600 movement. And from a young age, Robert, I 62 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:57,440 had anxiety. And I think that a lot of the 63 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:02,280 anxiety patterns that were keeping my nervous system stuck 64 00:04:02,280 --> 00:04:05,800 in a state of fight or flight was really showing up in my 65 00:04:05,800 --> 00:04:10,400 movements. So some of my teachers were 66 00:04:10,760 --> 00:04:17,480 very, very abusive verbally and emotionally. 67 00:04:17,480 --> 00:04:22,120 And so, you know, my body couldn't be but tense all day. 68 00:04:22,880 --> 00:04:26,080 And, but at the time, you know, I didn't make those connections. 69 00:04:26,080 --> 00:04:31,200 I, I just got really interested in, in, in anatomy and movement 70 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:34,360 rehabilitation. Later on I went to study 71 00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:38,680 physiotherapy. And for me, it was, you know, 72 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:43,320 maybe it was my technique, my hypermobility, But I don't know 73 00:04:43,320 --> 00:04:44,760 how much you want to know, Robert. 74 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:49,680 But, you know, once you dip your toe into the lake of nervous 75 00:04:49,680 --> 00:04:54,080 system regulation and the like, how it all works and how the 76 00:04:54,080 --> 00:04:57,560 brain and body speak to each other, it really all becomes 77 00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:01,280 very, very, very clear. That the root of a lot of my 78 00:05:01,280 --> 00:05:07,480 chronic injuries, especially tendonitis, especially fatigue 79 00:05:07,480 --> 00:05:12,400 around muscles causing ligaments to tear quite often in certain 80 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:17,560 times of my career. Yeah, how it's all connected to 81 00:05:17,560 --> 00:05:22,800 the state of my nervous system. And once I learned that later 82 00:05:22,800 --> 00:05:26,840 on, it was too late 'cause I had a big injury that unfortunately 83 00:05:26,840 --> 00:05:30,920 made me shift, or unfortunately or fortunately, 'cause now I do 84 00:05:30,920 --> 00:05:35,240 what I do but led me to shift careers. 85 00:05:35,240 --> 00:05:41,440 And yeah, so here we are now with all of this knowledge and 86 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:44,240 yeah. Well, this is probably the first 87 00:05:44,240 --> 00:05:46,400 time I've ever even heard the term hypermobile. 88 00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:48,880 I'm assuming that's kind of like akin to just extreme 89 00:05:48,880 --> 00:05:53,400 flexibility. Yeah, hypermobility. 90 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:56,080 There's actually a range of hypermobility. 91 00:05:56,080 --> 00:06:00,720 I have what's called Euler's Danlos Syndrome, which is just a 92 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:06,440 different way that the collagen protein stacks in my body. 93 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:11,040 So a lot of people who can bend their fingers all the way over 94 00:06:11,040 --> 00:06:13,680 or can do the splits, but have never really practiced the 95 00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:17,120 splits. Essentially a an extreme 96 00:06:17,640 --> 00:06:22,240 mobility around a joint, not necessarily flexibility of the 97 00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:26,760 muscle, but mobility of the joint is, you know, what a 98 00:06:27,080 --> 00:06:31,840 hypermobile individual has. And when you're a dancer, it can 99 00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:35,320 be an advantage. But when your muscles are not 100 00:06:35,320 --> 00:06:39,440 contracting and relaxing harmoniously, that can lead to 101 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:44,920 injury and tears and tendonitis and stress fractures and so on 102 00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:46,080 and so forth. Yeah. 103 00:06:46,720 --> 00:06:49,120 Robert, growing up, you and I would have called these people 104 00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:51,320 double jointed. Gotcha OK that makes a lot more 105 00:06:51,320 --> 00:06:54,240 sense. I feel like I I mean I could do 106 00:06:54,240 --> 00:06:56,360 the splits and I've been able to do the splits without any 107 00:06:56,360 --> 00:07:00,280 practice since I can remember, but that's like the only hyper 108 00:07:00,280 --> 00:07:02,680 mobile spot on my body that I'm aware of because everything else 109 00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:04,640 feels relatively stiff most of the time. 110 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:08,360 Yeah. You know that that can also be 111 00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:12,080 just like if what Jen is definitely talking about the 112 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:16,200 hyper mobility, the EDS model of that hyper mobility is a is a 113 00:07:16,200 --> 00:07:18,920 body wide phenomenon. But you know also just just 114 00:07:18,920 --> 00:07:23,360 based on movements that we kind of do compulsively or over and 115 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:26,240 over again as children that can compromise or change some 116 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:29,200 structure and mobility around particular joint structures. 117 00:07:30,280 --> 00:07:36,040 So it can be kind of imposed or it can be in, I guess, genetic. 118 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:37,280 Got you. What? 119 00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:39,040 What about you? Do you have any background in in 120 00:07:39,040 --> 00:07:46,240 dancing at that Gordon? I guess no, I, I, I've, I've, 121 00:07:46,240 --> 00:07:51,240 I'd like to date dancers and I that kind of thing. 122 00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:53,600 But no, I'm not myself. A background in dance. 123 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:58,240 My, my background, when I first got into this work, I'm a body 124 00:07:58,240 --> 00:08:00,640 worker and I was a body worker and a functional movement 125 00:08:00,640 --> 00:08:04,640 practitioner. And I myself was not a 126 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:09,200 professional athlete, but worked out CrossFit, had my share of 127 00:08:09,560 --> 00:08:13,840 all sorts of injuries and always trying to find better ways to 128 00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:18,080 recover and heal my body. And of course, as a body worker 129 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:22,080 whose job was to help people get out of pain because that's what 130 00:08:22,080 --> 00:08:26,760 I really specialized in. I was always focused on 131 00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:31,280 basically structure and quality of movement, right? 132 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:34,919 And so how can I get a body better aligned so that it's so 133 00:08:34,919 --> 00:08:37,840 that it's the way it's quote supposed to be? 134 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,120 And how can I get it moving cleanly? 135 00:08:40,120 --> 00:08:42,919 Because if it's moving cleanly, then it's not going to get 136 00:08:42,919 --> 00:08:45,960 injured. And so you, you might be able to 137 00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:49,960 relate to this and your listeners, you can be really, 138 00:08:50,440 --> 00:08:55,120 really focused on that good movement, good structure, good 139 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:57,640 recovery. And you can still get injured 140 00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:01,400 and you can still be in pain and you still have to release your 141 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:04,360 muscles into your stretches day after day after day. 142 00:09:04,440 --> 00:09:09,640 And where, you know, where my practice started to evolve is 143 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:15,400 that everyone looks at these problems in the tissue, let's 144 00:09:15,400 --> 00:09:18,320 say just tension or tightness and say, ah, that's just the way 145 00:09:18,320 --> 00:09:20,800 I am. I, I'm tight or it's from, it's 146 00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:25,560 from this like slight deviation and how I'm doing my squat that 147 00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:29,960 my QL or that my iliotibial band is, is getting tight. 148 00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:31,080 And then what are we going to do? 149 00:09:31,080 --> 00:09:33,760 We're going to stretch or like shove massage balls into that 150 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:36,120 tissue. And although I still actually 151 00:09:36,120 --> 00:09:38,040 really love doing a lot of that work. 152 00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:46,000 And it's where I've come from, the organ that is dictating the 153 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:51,400 tension levels in your muscles, that is dictating the length of 154 00:09:51,400 --> 00:09:55,600 them, the shortness of them, their willingness to go to a new 155 00:09:55,600 --> 00:10:01,000 range of motion, how they respond after being, let's say, 156 00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:04,080 exposed to workout or difficulty. 157 00:10:04,480 --> 00:10:07,920 The only organ responsible for all of the way those muscles are 158 00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:10,320 responding is your brain and nervous system. 159 00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:15,760 So at if you're working on your tissue as it's as if it's just 160 00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:20,720 some kind of like a mindless mechanical system that you have 161 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:24,960 to squish and stretch, you're missing like the heart of all of 162 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:27,120 it. Because what your muscles are 163 00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:29,480 doing, how they're clamping down, whether they're too 164 00:10:29,480 --> 00:10:32,400 elongated, whether they're having pain signals, whether 165 00:10:32,400 --> 00:10:34,880 they're chronically coming back into a contracted state so that 166 00:10:34,880 --> 00:10:37,280 you have to over and over and over and over again mechanically 167 00:10:37,280 --> 00:10:39,960 release them. It's when you start 168 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:41,920 understanding the secret language of the body and working 169 00:10:41,920 --> 00:10:45,680 from a nervous system centred approach that you can actually 170 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:50,480 fundamentally and lastingly retrain how that muscle and 171 00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:54,240 tissue is responding to life. OK, on that notes, I just had an 172 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,840 epiphany and I might be totally a bark at the wrong tree here, 173 00:10:56,840 --> 00:10:59,560 but let me know if there's any, any, any truth to this. 174 00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:03,520 So most people as they age, they notice that everything seems 175 00:11:03,520 --> 00:11:06,240 stiffer. They have decreased mobility, 176 00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:09,240 takes them longer to kind of get warmed up throughout the day to 177 00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:11,280 be able to move as they normally would. 178 00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:14,480 And I, I've noticed that myself, like I'm 32 and I've noticed 179 00:11:14,480 --> 00:11:17,040 that I'm not nearly as limber upon waking as I was 10 years 180 00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,000 ago. I'm very active, I'm training 181 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:20,600 all the time. I'm I'm doing all the right 182 00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:23,360 things, quote UN quote. But I've also noticed that as 183 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:28,560 I've gotten older, my stress and responsibilities in life have 184 00:11:28,560 --> 00:11:32,800 also significantly increased. And that may be the primary 185 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:36,720 correlative or causative reason I'm having this stiffness. 186 00:11:36,720 --> 00:11:39,800 If if what I'm hearing you say is, is what I'm kind of bleeding 187 00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:44,440 from here, is that more so a result of just my my sympathetic 188 00:11:45,200 --> 00:11:47,520 more so than parasympathetic state right now, which is the 189 00:11:47,520 --> 00:11:50,880 overall stressors that I'm experienced rather than the lack 190 00:11:50,880 --> 00:11:54,320 of mechanical mobility? You know, Robert, I, I, I love 191 00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:57,040 that you, that you bring that up and you're, you're already 192 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:00,240 thinking from that nervous, nervous system centered place. 193 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:04,320 So, you know, before we, we started here, you were curious 194 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:07,080 about like, what, what the heck is nervous system regulation and 195 00:12:07,080 --> 00:12:10,880 what's this all about? And so your brain and nervous 196 00:12:10,880 --> 00:12:16,640 system basically has one mission and one mission only, which is 197 00:12:16,680 --> 00:12:20,320 to keep you safe and not die. That's the if there were, if 198 00:12:20,320 --> 00:12:25,880 there was a binary zeros and ones, a spectrum of the only 199 00:12:25,920 --> 00:12:32,480 thing your Organism cares about is am I safe or unsafe? 200 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:36,320 Do I need to respond to this as a threat or not? 201 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:41,000 And whether it be your training regimen, your responsibilities 202 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:46,960 as a father, as a as a as a husband, your credit card bills, 203 00:12:46,960 --> 00:12:52,640 having to take out the trash. Every single input that comes 204 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:57,480 into you from the outside or your own thoughts into your body 205 00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:02,800 is passed through the single question of safe or unsafe, 206 00:13:03,160 --> 00:13:07,880 dangerous or not dangerous. And then based on a hell of a 207 00:13:07,880 --> 00:13:10,160 long time of evolution and adaptation. 208 00:13:10,600 --> 00:13:14,120 All of those things, the body only has a very limited amount 209 00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:15,880 of responses. You brought up parasympathetic 210 00:13:15,880 --> 00:13:19,600 and sympathetic, but whether it be your credit, credit card bill 211 00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:22,280 or your spouse being mad at you or not enough time to go to the 212 00:13:22,280 --> 00:13:26,960 gym, the moment that stress hits, it is going to use some 213 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:30,200 blend of some kind of sympathetic act activation, 214 00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:34,200 which in its most extreme is a fight flight response, right? 215 00:13:34,720 --> 00:13:37,040 Or it's actually going to use more ancient. 216 00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:39,560 Believe it or not, there are parasympathetic survival 217 00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:42,200 responses that go down a different pathway called the 218 00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:45,560 dorsal pathway, the Vegas. And those are going to look more 219 00:13:45,560 --> 00:13:52,600 like shut down, disassociation, low energy, fatigue, depression. 220 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:54,640 When both are on at the same time. 221 00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:57,080 When you've got the gas in the brake defensive patterns on at 222 00:13:57,080 --> 00:13:59,680 the same time, parasympathetic and sympathetic, you go into 223 00:13:59,680 --> 00:14:04,440 more of a freeze response or a functional freeze where you are 224 00:14:04,440 --> 00:14:06,960 still moving through the world, but your body's almost kind of 225 00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:09,000 stuck and everything takes effort. 226 00:14:09,320 --> 00:14:14,240 So I just want to say again that at 32, the amount of inputs 227 00:14:14,240 --> 00:14:16,440 coming into you from the outside in and from your mind down into 228 00:14:16,440 --> 00:14:20,840 your body that your survival nervous system has to navigate 229 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:24,320 and deal with has increased exponentially, most likely from 230 00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:27,560 your early 20s. And Jess, Jen and I find 231 00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:30,840 consist. I'm 39, I'm more mobile and 232 00:14:30,840 --> 00:14:34,640 comfortable in my body than I fucking ever have been because 233 00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:38,280 of the quality of the state of my nervous system and how I work 234 00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:41,360 with it. To not always be stuck in one of 235 00:14:41,360 --> 00:14:43,400 these spectrums of a survival response. 236 00:14:43,840 --> 00:14:47,040 That's what I want to get to, so enlighten me on that process. 237 00:14:47,760 --> 00:14:49,560 Oh, I have no idea how to do it, Jen. 238 00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:54,320 Maybe you could tell us? Enlighten you on the process of 239 00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:57,720 survival. Yeah, I want to feel better now 240 00:14:57,720 --> 00:14:59,120 than I did 10 years ago. Or or. 241 00:14:59,280 --> 00:14:59,920 Maybe how? Yeah. 242 00:14:59,920 --> 00:15:02,120 How to get at it. How do, how do we help Robert 243 00:15:02,400 --> 00:15:04,880 feel? Feel 10 years, 10 years less 244 00:15:04,880 --> 00:15:05,920 stressed? Yeah. 245 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:13,240 Nice that's going to be our next book feel ten years younger. 246 00:15:14,160 --> 00:15:16,280 Yeah. So I I've been loving this 247 00:15:16,280 --> 00:15:19,840 conversation so far. I love that we're hitting like 248 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:25,720 all the different aspects of the human body and brain and 249 00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:30,400 everything movement. And so, you know, to get to a 250 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:37,720 place where you're dipping into a body and a brain and a mind 251 00:15:38,200 --> 00:15:44,640 that is feeling in a state of thrival, a state of balance, a 252 00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:48,920 state of, you know, increased capacity for stress. 253 00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:52,480 Cause what I'm hearing, you know, you say Robert is, you 254 00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:56,800 know, I'm 32 and there's more stuff on the table now, but it's 255 00:15:56,800 --> 00:16:00,400 going to keep getting more and more and more because, you know, 256 00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:03,200 we're going to keep piling up things and we're going to get 257 00:16:03,640 --> 00:16:06,800 older and ultimately there's nothing we can do about that. 258 00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:11,400 What we, we can do is increase our capacity for dealing with, 259 00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:15,360 with it by building better patterns to move through stress. 260 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:18,560 So right now your nervous system, my nervous system card 261 00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:22,440 and nervous system has a way to deal with stress. 262 00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:28,200 For some of us, that's sending us into a state where when it's 263 00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:31,480 a little bit too overwhelming, we dissociate and maybe we 264 00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:34,920 decide that we're going to scroll on social media or, you 265 00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:41,720 know, distract ourselves with maybe going to the gym for a 266 00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:44,400 long time. Or, you know, these patterns 267 00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:48,480 where we're not actually tuning into the body and checking in 268 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:51,400 and asking it like, wait, what do I need? 269 00:16:51,400 --> 00:16:55,640 What emotion, what need here is unmet? 270 00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:59,760 What is it that I need more of in order to feel that I can 271 00:16:59,760 --> 00:17:03,000 handle this? And it's interesting 'cause our 272 00:17:03,920 --> 00:17:10,640 nervous system is a energy saving system and it starts with 273 00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:16,319 the brain. Our brain has so much, so many 274 00:17:16,319 --> 00:17:20,119 tasks that it has to carry out in every moment of our life. 275 00:17:20,119 --> 00:17:27,599 So the way in which our brain functions is to save patterns 276 00:17:27,599 --> 00:17:32,120 from the past that have worked and help us, helped us survive, 277 00:17:32,120 --> 00:17:36,360 and then replay them when a pattern that is similar or the 278 00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:41,720 same shows up again. So if we learned that emotions 279 00:17:41,880 --> 00:17:45,880 of or, you know, experiences of stress are too overwhelming for 280 00:17:45,880 --> 00:17:49,160 us to cope with, then our nervous system may have shut us 281 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:53,040 down. And then we find ourselves at 32 282 00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:58,280 with a lot of responsibilities and financial responsibilities. 283 00:17:58,280 --> 00:18:02,800 And maybe, you know, our, we have our own business and all 284 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:06,960 those things. Our nervous system is like, OK, 285 00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:10,600 you know what, Robert? This has worked for 32 years. 286 00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:14,120 But now I think I need another strategy 'cause it's getting, 287 00:18:14,120 --> 00:18:18,640 it's, it's getting too much. And the way in which, you know, 288 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:22,520 whether it's too much or not is your body sends you messages 289 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:27,520 like you might, you know, you might feel a little bit of brain 290 00:18:27,520 --> 00:18:31,640 fog at times or your performance isn't up to par as it normally 291 00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:33,640 is. Like, wait, I'm training, I'm 292 00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:37,000 doing all these things. And why, why is my performance 293 00:18:37,000 --> 00:18:40,800 plateauing or declining or gosh, I'm, I'm always getting this 294 00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:43,160 headache in the morning or my motivation is low. 295 00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:46,000 You know, there's all these messages that our body sends us 296 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:49,160 whispers. They begin with whispers and 297 00:18:49,160 --> 00:18:52,360 when we ignore them and we don't know what these are and we we 298 00:18:52,360 --> 00:18:56,400 just push it through. Later on, they become a scream 299 00:18:56,400 --> 00:19:01,200 like, you know, like when someone throws their back out at 300 00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:03,000 the gym. It's like your body is telling 301 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,480 you to either slow down or change something. 302 00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:11,160 So going back to how to feel better and how to be in the best 303 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:16,520 body and brain, as we age, it's really about increasing our 304 00:19:16,520 --> 00:19:20,200 awareness and tuning into the patterns that we're using. 305 00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:24,360 So Robert, my question for you is, what do you think one of 306 00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:26,920 your patterns is when you feel stressed? 307 00:19:26,920 --> 00:19:31,000 How do you cope with stress? Oh I am 100% a bona fide 308 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:33,600 workaholic. Like I just don't sleep and work 309 00:19:33,600 --> 00:19:37,240 more which is not good. Yeah, yeah. 310 00:19:37,280 --> 00:19:41,520 And so, so just me asking you that and you sharing that when 311 00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:45,320 you tune into your body for a moment, you know, just just play 312 00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:49,680 that in your in your in your mind, in your mind's eye, like 313 00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:52,320 I'm a workaholic. What that actually looks like, 314 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,200 like waking up early, non-stop, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, 315 00:19:55,200 --> 00:19:57,960 boom, nighttime sleep, wake up, repeat. 316 00:19:58,480 --> 00:20:03,440 What feelings and sensations does that give to to your body? 317 00:20:03,440 --> 00:20:07,000 If you tune in, does your heart start beating faster? 318 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:10,080 Do you start to get anxiety? Like, Oh my gosh, you know what, 319 00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:13,200 As I'm thinking about this, there's so much stuff I have to 320 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:15,880 do and you can go right back into the cycle. 321 00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:19,320 What happens as you TuneIn? I typically just go right back 322 00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:21,640 into the cycle. Like I've had a few legit panic 323 00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:25,480 attacks, not too many, but like I've always trained and eaten 324 00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:29,240 well in the context of that hyper stressed moment. 325 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:32,720 So that allows me to kind of keep going forward. 326 00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:35,360 If I didn't train or eat right, then I would totally just fall 327 00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:37,920 over in a heap. But that is kind of like my 328 00:20:37,920 --> 00:20:41,080 coping mechanism in those times of extreme stress. 329 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:45,240 But I, I, I know I need to just remove some of the stuff from my 330 00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:49,440 plate, but I like doing things. I like doing too many things. 331 00:20:51,160 --> 00:20:53,240 Oh, Jen, should we? Should We should. 332 00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:54,680 We should. We blow, should we blow up his 333 00:20:54,680 --> 00:21:00,640 spot for a second? I was never going to say just 334 00:21:00,640 --> 00:21:05,000 want to just want to offer that like we have thousands of 335 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:08,080 clients who have burned out doing what they love. 336 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:11,720 Yeah, I totally get it, man. Like I see, I see the writing on 337 00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:13,840 the wall from people. You know, 10 years older than 338 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:17,200 me. I am I crashed with multiple 339 00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:19,960 chronic not this is not going to be you, Robert. 340 00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:24,160 This is this is my story, not yours, but yeah, I was 341 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:25,400 definitely one of those people too. 342 00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:29,840 I'm I'm I'm a a pusher as well. Yeah, You know, I just, I don't 343 00:21:29,840 --> 00:21:31,720 want to hop in for a SEC because it's so good. 344 00:21:31,720 --> 00:21:35,120 And Jen, Jen, forgive me because you know, I'm just, I'm just a 345 00:21:35,320 --> 00:21:36,640 bull out of trying to shop sometimes. 346 00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:40,760 But what I like to say, you know, Robert, there's a, there's 347 00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:43,840 a lot of lifehackers and a lot of biohackers who have designed 348 00:21:43,840 --> 00:21:47,560 their life around an endless amount of performance and doing. 349 00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:53,240 And that's, you know, that's incredible. 350 00:21:53,640 --> 00:21:57,320 But it's like for every new Lifehacker biohack that they 351 00:21:57,320 --> 00:22:04,600 gain, instead of seizing back time, life, joy, pleasure, 352 00:22:04,800 --> 00:22:11,360 presence being, they just pack more fucking doing into the same 353 00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:14,200 8 to 10 hours. And whereas like they've 354 00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:17,200 increased their productive productivity by 4X, but they've 355 00:22:17,200 --> 00:22:23,720 seized back zero freedom. And besides that, Robert, the 356 00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:26,200 other thing is I like to say we've had thousands of people 357 00:22:26,200 --> 00:22:28,800 actually like most, like at least half of the people that 358 00:22:28,800 --> 00:22:30,640 are our clients, burned out doing what they love. 359 00:22:31,040 --> 00:22:36,200 If you think of your beautiful, capable body as a bridge, and 360 00:22:36,200 --> 00:22:42,680 that bridge over a river is rated for, let's say 1000 cars 361 00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:47,560 at any given moment, first of all, it doesn't care if it likes 362 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:51,560 the cars or dislikes the cars. It's just suitable to carry a 363 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:54,600 load of 1000 cars at any given time. 364 00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:59,160 And then when it starts to have 2000 cars on it again, it 365 00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:03,040 doesn't care if it likes the make and models of the vehicles 366 00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:07,920 driving over it or hates them. It's begins to stress that 367 00:23:07,920 --> 00:23:10,600 structure, stress that structure. 368 00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:13,560 And it holds on more and more and more. 369 00:23:13,560 --> 00:23:17,160 But then there begin to be cracks and cracks and cracks and 370 00:23:17,160 --> 00:23:19,280 we hold on tighter and tighter and tighter. 371 00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:24,440 And I think where where we come from is that no matter how much 372 00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,200 a human being wants to ignore their Physiology, their 373 00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:31,280 Physiology and their nervous system will make it very clear 374 00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:35,400 in the end what it's capable of and what it does and doesn't 375 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:37,440 want to do. Yeah, no, that makes total 376 00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:39,280 sense. And I feel like now I don't know 377 00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:41,440 if y'all have kids or not, but like I've got a 2 year old and 378 00:23:41,440 --> 00:23:46,360 having a 2 year old kind of brings light to that reality as 379 00:23:46,360 --> 00:23:48,360 well. Because like, I love business, I 380 00:23:48,360 --> 00:23:51,400 love entrepreneurship, I love bodybuilding, I love, you know, 381 00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:54,200 networking, brain creation, all of those things. 382 00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:57,360 But he doesn't know what any of that stuff is and he doesn't 383 00:23:57,360 --> 00:24:00,840 care yet. So like when I sacrifice time 384 00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:04,240 with him to do those things, I'm taking away time with him and I 385 00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:07,000 care about that more than anything at the end of the day, 386 00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:08,160 so. That. 387 00:24:08,160 --> 00:24:09,640 Brings me. Yeah, that brings. 388 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:14,680 Me, I, I. Didn't make catch you out there, 389 00:24:14,680 --> 00:24:15,160 Jane? Go ahead. 390 00:24:16,480 --> 00:24:18,360 No, no, sorry. Go ahead, Go ahead. 391 00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:20,160 Yeah. I was just saying that that that 392 00:24:20,160 --> 00:24:24,400 brings me that kind of grounds me because at the end of the 393 00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:28,000 day, like I, I'm not going to be on my deathbed wishing I had 394 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:31,280 made another business deal. I mean, maybe, but probably not. 395 00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:33,600 But I could definitely see myself wishing I had spent more 396 00:24:33,600 --> 00:24:36,360 time with my son when he was still living with me, you know, 397 00:24:36,360 --> 00:24:39,200 So I, I can't that that is always kind of like the rock 398 00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:41,760 that I have to question things with now, which I think is. 399 00:24:41,760 --> 00:24:42,880 Good. I love that too. 400 00:24:44,120 --> 00:24:45,400 Love it. We're both parents. 401 00:24:45,400 --> 00:24:48,360 We're both parents. Yeah, Robert, I have a 2 year 402 00:24:48,360 --> 00:24:54,000 old and actually today I spent a moment to, you know, just 403 00:24:54,000 --> 00:24:59,040 acknowledge and be grateful for my husband on this journey of, 404 00:24:59,120 --> 00:25:00,840 you know, writing the book and our business. 405 00:25:00,840 --> 00:25:04,720 And you know, when Harper Collins DM Ed me, I was three 406 00:25:04,720 --> 00:25:10,200 months postpartum and I was like what, where do I go from here? 407 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:15,080 Like how what happens next? And, you know, it, it all worked 408 00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:17,200 out in the end. And we have this amazing book, 409 00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:22,160 but it took a lot of support. And I think that in every 410 00:25:22,160 --> 00:25:25,200 moment, I just love what you said so much because in every 411 00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:31,400 moment that I have felt some form of urgency or some, you 412 00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:35,920 know, like deep dysregulation in the moment when I switch off and 413 00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:38,960 I go and be with my son and my husband. 414 00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:46,440 Do you know like 99 .9999% of it melt away, melts away 415 00:25:46,440 --> 00:25:49,840 completely. And I have a 2 year old as well. 416 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:57,200 And it's just just learning to be present and being with them 417 00:25:57,280 --> 00:26:02,200 in those moments is so precious. And, and I hear you on that, you 418 00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:05,760 know, on, on what you shared with wanting to be with your 419 00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:10,240 with your child. And yeah, I think that there's 420 00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:13,200 definitely a good balance to strike there. 421 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:17,320 And it's, it's interesting, 'cause like if, if it wasn't for 422 00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:21,120 having him, like I would never be able to justify sitting on 423 00:26:21,120 --> 00:26:24,040 the couch and doing nothing for 30 minutes like that, that would 424 00:26:24,040 --> 00:26:27,080 never fly. But now that I have him, if I 425 00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:29,320 just sit on the couch with him for 30 minutes and like read him 426 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:32,600 a book or, you know, do something, doing nothing but 427 00:26:32,600 --> 00:26:35,320 doing something with him, like I could easily justify that as 428 00:26:35,320 --> 00:26:38,200 time well spent. So it kind of like secondarily 429 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:42,480 forces me to actually take a minute, which is probably an 430 00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:44,440 advantageous physiologically for me. 431 00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:50,000 And if I'd say so that's that, that's, that's actually the 432 00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:54,080 biggest flex, right? Like you are crushing it as a 433 00:26:54,080 --> 00:26:58,080 human, a man, a father, a husband, an entrepreneur, when 434 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:04,520 you can actually have unpolluted time with your children or 435 00:27:04,520 --> 00:27:06,800 anybody that you love. And what I mean by unpolluted 436 00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:09,920 time is like, you also know what it's like, Robert, when you're 437 00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:13,440 really with your son versus when you're with him but thinking 438 00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:15,760 about work. Yeah, totally, totally. 439 00:27:15,760 --> 00:27:17,720 And it's easy to do. Like if you're, I mean, as you 440 00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:19,520 all seem to be on this conversation, like when you're 441 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:22,760 a, you know, type A very much go, go, go type of person. 442 00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:26,560 Like there is no shutting down. Like there is no clocking out 443 00:27:26,560 --> 00:27:28,080 for the day. Like it never stops. 444 00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,280 Like I wake up thinking about things I've got to do. 445 00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:31,720 I go to sleep thinking about things I have to do. 446 00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:37,240 But being with your son, daughter, child like you, you, 447 00:27:37,400 --> 00:27:41,720 you recognize that there's no use in thinking about the bills 448 00:27:41,720 --> 00:27:45,080 you got to pay or the the books you got to reconcile in that 449 00:27:45,080 --> 00:27:49,080 very moment. Love that. 450 00:27:49,200 --> 00:27:51,680 Yeah, that's so true. So, so true. 451 00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,480 I love where this this conversation is going even more, 452 00:27:54,480 --> 00:27:58,680 Robert. I mean, connection and movement 453 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,360 and body and nervous system. So great. 454 00:28:01,640 --> 00:28:04,040 Yeah. I am going to jump in and also 455 00:28:04,040 --> 00:28:07,480 say, you know, Robert, we the the children are a really 456 00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:10,480 amazing access point. But what you just said about 457 00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:14,600 being a type A go, go, go, it doesn't stop. 458 00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:21,360 So, you know, we, Jen and I are very similar or we're 459 00:28:21,360 --> 00:28:25,240 recovering. We are recovering incessant, you 460 00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:32,760 know, productive perfectionists. And what we find with people is 461 00:28:32,760 --> 00:28:35,880 that although they, the, the people that do that end up they, 462 00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:38,440 they often have a lot of energy that they want to distribute, 463 00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:41,200 distribute. There's there's a question of 464 00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:48,440 like, why can't we sit still? And the why, why can't we sit 465 00:28:48,440 --> 00:28:52,600 still is largely because our nervous system is using an 466 00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:57,480 endless amount of productivity as a coping strategy to help us 467 00:28:57,480 --> 00:29:02,520 deal with dysregulation and the experiences inside our bodies 468 00:29:02,760 --> 00:29:08,560 that we can't be with, that we haven't ever been able to be 469 00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:12,640 with, that we've been sort of contorting and avoiding around 470 00:29:12,640 --> 00:29:18,760 our whole lives. And that is something that we 471 00:29:18,760 --> 00:29:23,160 support people in in that awareness step of really getting 472 00:29:23,160 --> 00:29:26,680 to feel like, like for me, I the more question is like, why? 473 00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:30,480 Why is it so difficult for me to just sit here doing nothing with 474 00:29:30,480 --> 00:29:34,080 my child sometimes? Why is there this endless draw 475 00:29:34,080 --> 00:29:38,120 to the other thing, the next thing and seeing sort of not 476 00:29:38,120 --> 00:29:43,600 only how dysregulated that is, but we are most of what we're 477 00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:45,240 teaching our children is non verbal. 478 00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:49,760 Most of what we're teaching our children is in the our tone, 479 00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:54,560 our, our, our, our posture, the movements of our body, just our 480 00:29:54,560 --> 00:30:00,560 resonance and our vibration. And you know, my kid knows when 481 00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:04,160 I'm when I'm actually present with them or not. 482 00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:07,800 And so a big important part of I think that we try to bring to 483 00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:11,600 people is that when you can get down into the language of your 484 00:30:11,600 --> 00:30:14,520 body and you can actually be like, whoa, what happens if I 485 00:30:14,520 --> 00:30:18,480 were to really question this pervasive behavior of endless 486 00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:22,840 productivity and, and look at it and see like, what is it instead 487 00:30:22,840 --> 00:30:25,440 of what is it trying to do? What is it trying to avoid? 488 00:30:25,800 --> 00:30:28,040 There's there's a lot to be discovered. 489 00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:31,800 Down there, No, I totally agree. So, So what are some like 490 00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:36,160 actionable, you know, routines or practices that y'all 491 00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:38,600 incorporate on a regular basis to make sure that you keep 492 00:30:38,600 --> 00:30:43,120 things in the rails and you don't, you know, kind of resort 493 00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:46,080 back to your never ending To Do List ways. 494 00:30:46,680 --> 00:30:49,200 I'm going to, I'm going to pass it off to Jen in one SEC because 495 00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:51,160 we kind of both have different elements. 496 00:30:51,160 --> 00:30:55,360 But, but what we teach people is a framework first, right? 497 00:30:55,360 --> 00:30:57,800 Because I, I love framework because there's something that 498 00:30:57,800 --> 00:31:00,440 people can really adapt for their own needs and bring them 499 00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:02,720 into their lives. But the framework we teach is 500 00:31:02,720 --> 00:31:07,080 called the AIR approach, which is AI IR, which is awareness 501 00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:12,560 interruption and redesign. So the techniques we teach is 502 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:17,160 that you know you cannot manage or change what you're not aware 503 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:19,120 of, what you're not clocking, right? 504 00:31:19,120 --> 00:31:24,640 You can't the first step in recovery is acknowledging that 505 00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:28,360 you have a problem, right. So awareness is the first step 506 00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:31,480 of actually as Jen kind of guided you a little bit earlier. 507 00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,720 Like if I just have you close your eyes for a moment, Robert 508 00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:38,840 and everyone can who's on unless you're driving can do this. 509 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:43,960 You close your eyes for a moment and I just have you notice your 510 00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:46,880 chest. Only your chest, which concludes 511 00:31:46,880 --> 00:31:53,120 your breath and your heart. And I have you think about your 512 00:31:53,600 --> 00:32:01,160 e-mail inbox. Did anything happen in your 513 00:32:01,160 --> 00:32:03,800 chest when you thought about your inbox? 514 00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:08,600 I mean, a little bit of stress, but I've, I've really committed 515 00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:10,400 to getting that knocked out every single day. 516 00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:13,920 So inbox zero has been my daily goal for quite some time now. 517 00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:16,160 I've been successful with it. So my inbox isn't my main 518 00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:18,680 stressor, but it it often times is. 519 00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:20,000 So I totally get where you're going there. 520 00:32:20,840 --> 00:32:22,240 Right. And but that's actually 521 00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:24,200 interesting, right? So you've come up with a 522 00:32:24,200 --> 00:32:30,000 behavior Inbox 0, which helps you eliminate the implicit 523 00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:31,920 stress that comes up when you think about it. 524 00:32:32,040 --> 00:32:33,880 Yeah, totally. Right. 525 00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:37,560 So although I really applaud inbox Zero and sometimes I show 526 00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:39,320 off, sometimes I'll get to inbox zero, right? 527 00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:41,440 Like two or three times a year I'll screenshot it and put it on 528 00:32:41,440 --> 00:32:44,840 my Instagram. Like, it's a fleeting thing, 529 00:32:44,840 --> 00:32:48,040 right, 'cause Inbox zero is like a hamster wheel and and our 530 00:32:48,040 --> 00:32:50,880 brother would be like whoa for someone to even notice that 531 00:32:50,880 --> 00:32:53,480 their chest constricts a little bit, that their breaths, their 532 00:32:53,480 --> 00:32:56,120 breath tightens and their heart rate increases just when they 533 00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:58,600 think about their inbox. That's where we start. 534 00:32:59,160 --> 00:33:03,560 Then in the interruption step, instead of taking on a behavior 535 00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:06,720 immediately like inbox zero or crushing through the emails, 536 00:33:06,720 --> 00:33:10,800 it's like, whoa, what happens if we actually use some vagus nerve 537 00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:15,120 techniques, some breathing techniques to get the body out 538 00:33:15,200 --> 00:33:19,480 of the stress response that was initiated by the stimulus and 539 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:22,720 bring and start teaching the body that it doesn't have to go 540 00:33:22,720 --> 00:33:27,080 into a fight mode or a freeze mode or an immediate behavior to 541 00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,520 solve what it's feeling. It can actually just feel safe 542 00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:33,120 and OK. Now to regulate. 543 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:34,880 Now to down regulate in the moment. 544 00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:38,080 That's the interruption step. And then from the interruption 545 00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:41,200 step, we move on to redesign, which is how can I teach my 546 00:33:41,200 --> 00:33:47,480 nervous system ongoingly to not respond to these everyday 547 00:33:47,480 --> 00:33:50,240 stressors as if my life depended on it? 548 00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:54,240 Yeah, so. That's the AIR framework. 549 00:33:54,240 --> 00:33:58,960 But Jen, do you want to speak a bit to some of your routines, 550 00:33:58,960 --> 00:34:04,400 your processes? Yeah, that was great. 551 00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:08,280 What, what Cardin shared is, is the approach that's in our book 552 00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:14,520 and it's a really complete work to helping you not just 553 00:34:14,520 --> 00:34:18,320 overcome, but really rewire that pattern so that you're 554 00:34:18,320 --> 00:34:23,120 automatically connecting and you know, and doing the new way. 555 00:34:23,120 --> 00:34:29,639 Once you've practiced that the new the new pattern. 556 00:34:29,639 --> 00:34:34,600 So, so basically, if you can check in with yourself a few 557 00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:39,600 times a day and ask yourself, you know, am I meeting all of 558 00:34:39,600 --> 00:34:42,280 my, am I meeting all my basic needs? 559 00:34:42,280 --> 00:34:46,080 Have I had enough water today? Have I had too many coffees? 560 00:34:46,719 --> 00:34:48,679 Do I need to slow down a little bit? 561 00:34:48,679 --> 00:34:53,000 Do I actually just need to sit down for a moment and just take 562 00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,880 a deep breath? So right now, Robert, I'm going 563 00:34:55,880 --> 00:35:03,280 to ask you take the deepest breath you've taken all all day 564 00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:11,120 and let me know how it feels once you've taken that big 565 00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:13,560 exhale feels. Pretty good. 566 00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:15,520 I should probably do that on a regular basis for sure. 567 00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:20,080 Yeah. What did you notice about your 568 00:35:20,080 --> 00:35:22,640 body, Your posture? Maybe your breath? 569 00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:30,520 Every time I actually mindfully focus on breath work, I noticed 570 00:35:30,520 --> 00:35:32,440 just much more clarity. Like one thing I've been 571 00:35:32,440 --> 00:35:37,480 incorporating is after I train every day, I try and have a like 572 00:35:37,520 --> 00:35:40,600 10 minute moment of meditation before I eat my first meal. 573 00:35:40,840 --> 00:35:43,400 And I kind of incorporated that when I was in my prep and I was 574 00:35:43,880 --> 00:35:45,320 super depleted and hungry all the time. 575 00:35:45,840 --> 00:35:50,440 But just like allowing myself to, to center and relax has a 576 00:35:50,520 --> 00:35:54,480 pretty, pretty monumental impact on just the stress, anxiety 577 00:35:54,480 --> 00:35:57,040 levels, you know, acutely, but then also throughout the day. 578 00:35:57,320 --> 00:36:03,280 So that that's been key for me. I love that they're also some 579 00:36:03,280 --> 00:36:05,080 really good vagus nerve exercises. 580 00:36:06,240 --> 00:36:09,360 I don't know if your audience is familiar with them, if you've 581 00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:13,920 talked about them on your your podcast, but there are some 582 00:36:13,920 --> 00:36:19,560 really great simple ones that can really help you sort of 583 00:36:19,800 --> 00:36:24,720 discharge that pent up energy in the body that leads to anxiety 584 00:36:24,720 --> 00:36:28,520 or leads to, you know, a coping mechanism or spiraling, 585 00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:29,800 especially when you're triggered. 586 00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:33,720 So one of these is just a vocalization. 587 00:36:33,720 --> 00:36:39,960 So when you have a moment to yourself and you have space to 588 00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:46,440 to breathe loudly and say things like vuh ah EE, the invitation 589 00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:55,320 is to inhale through your nose in one exhale, say vuh ah EE, 590 00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:59,200 and whilst you're saying it, tapping on your chest. 591 00:36:59,200 --> 00:37:09,920 So inhaling vuh ah EE. And you're more than welcome to 592 00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:14,800 try this as I'm explaining. But what happens is the vocal 593 00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:19,920 cords, which are innervated by the vagus nerve, stimulate the 594 00:37:19,920 --> 00:37:23,200 vagus nerve, stimulating that parasympathetic response in the 595 00:37:23,200 --> 00:37:28,400 body, allowing your body to go from a state of sympathetic 596 00:37:28,400 --> 00:37:34,520 activation or shut down, bringing about that ventral 597 00:37:34,520 --> 00:37:37,720 vagal parasympathetic. Because although the shutdown 598 00:37:37,720 --> 00:37:41,960 response is a parasympathetic response, what Cardin was saying 599 00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:44,120 earlier, there's the dorsal and the ventral. 600 00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:48,800 And when we use our voice, not just breath work, but actually 601 00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:55,360 the voice, as we exhale, we're stimulating the ventral state 602 00:37:55,360 --> 00:37:58,880 inner body, which allows us to not only feel calm, connected 603 00:37:59,120 --> 00:38:04,760 and grounded and empowered and and centered, but also helps 604 00:38:04,760 --> 00:38:07,320 release that pent up energy in our nervous system. 605 00:38:07,320 --> 00:38:10,480 So those beautiful vocalizations, you know, we 606 00:38:10,480 --> 00:38:13,520 recommend to do them a few times a day, especially if you're 607 00:38:13,520 --> 00:38:16,000 feeling particularly stressed or activated. 608 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:21,040 And three minutes of vu ah E and tapping on your chest at the 609 00:38:21,040 --> 00:38:27,600 same time is so, so powerful. Another one that is really easy 610 00:38:27,600 --> 00:38:31,520 is just stomping. So literally standing up and 611 00:38:31,520 --> 00:38:35,720 taking a minute to stomp your feet on the ground and then 612 00:38:35,720 --> 00:38:39,600 shake your body is if you had water, you know, after shower 613 00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,720 and you're like shaking your hands and your legs as if you 614 00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:47,960 didn't have a towel. That shaking and the stomping 615 00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:53,640 sends messages to the brain that stimulate the nervous system to 616 00:38:53,640 --> 00:38:56,920 again release that pent up energy, bringing you in a state 617 00:38:56,920 --> 00:39:00,080 of regulation. So there are many exercises that 618 00:39:00,080 --> 00:39:05,520 you can do, many accessible free things that you can implement in 619 00:39:05,520 --> 00:39:11,000 your day, as well as the very powerful holistic framework that 620 00:39:11,000 --> 00:39:12,680 Cardin was talking about earlier. 621 00:39:12,680 --> 00:39:16,240 I. Feel like a good sledgehammer on 622 00:39:16,240 --> 00:39:20,600 a tire in the gym would would probably emulate that in some 623 00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:22,080 form of fashion. I might have to throw that into 624 00:39:22,080 --> 00:39:24,640 my mix as well. But now and Robert, when you do 625 00:39:24,640 --> 00:39:30,200 it, I'm we're we're very serious about this, like to actually 626 00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:35,280 allow the emotional messages from the body to hold the 627 00:39:35,280 --> 00:39:36,400 hammer. Yeah. 628 00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:42,240 Right, There's something about South exercise is just such a 629 00:39:42,240 --> 00:39:46,800 phenomenal way to process and metabolize emotions, but we 630 00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:49,040 actually have to be present and feel some of those. 631 00:39:49,040 --> 00:39:53,600 But I would, I would, I would invite any of your listeners who 632 00:39:53,600 --> 00:39:57,280 normally, let's say, have tend to have a lot of chronic tension 633 00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:02,560 and will, you know, do foam rolling or lacrosse ball work or 634 00:40:02,560 --> 00:40:06,320 whatever that here's the invitation instead of doing that 635 00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:09,160 next time. Focus on the areas of your body 636 00:40:09,160 --> 00:40:12,360 that tend to be tight. Just take my word for it. 637 00:40:13,120 --> 00:40:16,440 When you're noticing the tightness, ask yourself, does 638 00:40:16,440 --> 00:40:19,040 this area of my body does this piriformis muscle? 639 00:40:19,040 --> 00:40:21,400 Does this quad? Does my tight shoulders? 640 00:40:21,400 --> 00:40:24,520 Do they have a mood to them? Do they have an attitude? 641 00:40:24,520 --> 00:40:27,880 If they were, if they were a Pixar character, what would they 642 00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:30,040 look like? What's their facial expression? 643 00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:37,520 And then let that attitude, that mood, that sense of emotion or 644 00:40:37,520 --> 00:40:42,000 sensation in that part of your tissue, let that pick up the 645 00:40:42,000 --> 00:40:43,560 hammer. Let that move you. 646 00:40:43,560 --> 00:40:46,920 Let that do 10 to 15 minutes of a workout. 647 00:40:47,120 --> 00:40:48,680 Don't let your mind get in the way. 648 00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:53,080 Let the emotional experience in the body lead and the tension 649 00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:57,520 will be gone when you're done. Yeah, 100% Think that like 650 00:40:57,560 --> 00:41:02,080 resistance training in which you allow your body to just act in 651 00:41:02,080 --> 00:41:05,800 its native emotional state is probably the most therapeutic 652 00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:09,000 thing I've ever experienced. Like if I did not have the 653 00:41:09,000 --> 00:41:12,320 ability to do that, I would be, I, I don't even know what I'd 654 00:41:12,320 --> 00:41:13,920 be. I'd probably be like suicidal or 655 00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:15,880 like a threat to society or something. 656 00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:17,720 Oh. Hell, hell yeah. 657 00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:25,640 Having that is is, yeah. So I, when I, when I was a, a 658 00:41:25,640 --> 00:41:31,760 personal trainer and I would get clients, you know, all ages. 659 00:41:31,760 --> 00:41:38,360 But there was this particular man who I remember he was Aceo 660 00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:43,320 very high up in a, in a very, very famous television 661 00:41:43,320 --> 00:41:45,320 production company in, in the world. 662 00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:49,400 And he would walk in we, we, I had a session with him every 663 00:41:49,400 --> 00:41:54,600 morning. And when he first came to me, he 664 00:41:54,600 --> 00:41:58,680 was like, I, you know, I just, I just want to, I just want to put 665 00:41:58,680 --> 00:42:01,440 on some muscle, OK? And he was in his 50s, late, 666 00:42:01,520 --> 00:42:05,560 late 50s. And then I couldn't help but 667 00:42:05,560 --> 00:42:10,440 notice whenever he walked into the gym, he was, he had slouched 668 00:42:10,440 --> 00:42:13,880 shoulders. He just had this look about him 669 00:42:13,880 --> 00:42:17,920 that, you know, it was like I, I had to pull him off the ground, 670 00:42:19,000 --> 00:42:22,360 you know, through the exercises. My goal was always like, right, 671 00:42:22,360 --> 00:42:27,240 let's lift him up, let's get his body to shift the state in his 672 00:42:27,240 --> 00:42:30,600 brain. And whenever he would pick up 673 00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:34,960 those heavier weights, whenever he would get his full body 674 00:42:34,960 --> 00:42:40,960 moving, you know, I, I'm, I'm talking like dead lifts and just 675 00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:44,160 the heavier weight moving through the whole body. 676 00:42:45,360 --> 00:42:50,600 He would actually have a little bit of this response where he 677 00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:55,200 would be a little bit angry for maybe like 20 minutes. 678 00:42:55,200 --> 00:42:56,520 He would. I could see it. 679 00:42:56,520 --> 00:43:00,720 He was furious, not necessarily at the he thought it was at the 680 00:43:00,720 --> 00:43:04,080 exercise I was giving him, but it wasn't, I could tell it was 681 00:43:04,080 --> 00:43:07,480 from it was his body. His muscles were like, wow, 682 00:43:07,480 --> 00:43:12,000 there is a lot of anger in here. There is this emotion that is 683 00:43:12,000 --> 00:43:15,040 coming out right now. And as we were moving through 684 00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:18,680 the exercises and then coming down towards the end of the 685 00:43:18,680 --> 00:43:23,160 session, a couple of times when especially when we were by 686 00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:29,080 ourselves in, in, in a part of the gym where no one else could, 687 00:43:29,320 --> 00:43:33,520 could see him because he was, you know, he's that type of man 688 00:43:33,520 --> 00:43:35,560 that wouldn't want to be seen crying. 689 00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:41,760 And he, he, he bawled his eyes out and he was so confused and 690 00:43:41,760 --> 00:43:44,520 he didn't understand why. And you know, those moments when 691 00:43:44,520 --> 00:43:49,240 he did it was this full body restoration. 692 00:43:49,240 --> 00:43:51,600 It's like, you know, through movement. 693 00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:54,440 And I know you know this, Robert, because of what you do 694 00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:59,040 and how you use your body. Like there's so much unconscious 695 00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:01,680 unraveling of the brain of emotions. 696 00:44:01,680 --> 00:44:04,920 And you know, it's it's great when we have that awareness on 697 00:44:04,920 --> 00:44:07,080 top of it to know what's actually happening. 698 00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:11,560 But sometimes a lot of healing can happen just through our 699 00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:14,160 body, through movement, through letting what Cardin was saying 700 00:44:14,160 --> 00:44:18,800 earlier, our muscles, you know, really express that emotion that 701 00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:22,920 is being repressed in our body and that hasn't had a chance to 702 00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:25,600 come out. So yeah, I thought that was such 703 00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:28,040 a powerful moment for for this man. 704 00:44:28,320 --> 00:44:31,000 Yeah, I feel like a lot of people that I mean, we all, we 705 00:44:31,000 --> 00:44:33,840 all have some stressors in life. We all have responsibilities, We 706 00:44:33,840 --> 00:44:35,560 all have things that weigh heavily on us. 707 00:44:35,560 --> 00:44:39,200 And for those that don't have an outlet, they don't train, they 708 00:44:39,200 --> 00:44:43,280 don't have, you know, some, some medium to release that energy, 709 00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:46,840 those are often times the ones that I see turning to some form 710 00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:49,720 of dissociative behaviour like substance abuse. 711 00:44:49,720 --> 00:44:53,560 And then it just becomes this downward spiral of pent up 712 00:44:53,560 --> 00:44:56,600 energy that eventually, you know, breaks them. 713 00:44:57,480 --> 00:45:01,120 So I think if you have that ability to release it in a 714 00:45:01,120 --> 00:45:04,160 healthy manner, IE weight training or something similar, 715 00:45:04,480 --> 00:45:08,480 you can just bypass or mitigate the need for that, you know, 716 00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:11,400 addictive in a negative sense, dissociative behaviour. 717 00:45:14,720 --> 00:45:17,400 I totally I, I totally agree. I I really do. 718 00:45:17,400 --> 00:45:20,640 You know that we had a when I was in massage therapy school, 719 00:45:21,200 --> 00:45:24,680 the kind of covert slogan was move or die. 720 00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:27,840 Yeah. Right, just move or die. 721 00:45:27,840 --> 00:45:33,280 And we are an Organism, one could say organized completely 722 00:45:33,280 --> 00:45:37,680 around movement as like our primary means of being in the 723 00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:41,240 world. And so yes, yes, yes to 724 00:45:41,240 --> 00:45:44,240 movement. And I don't think these are your 725 00:45:44,240 --> 00:45:46,320 listeners, but like, cardio ain't enough, right? 726 00:45:46,320 --> 00:45:49,680 As Jen just expressed, as you expressed, those muscles need 727 00:45:49,680 --> 00:45:55,200 something juicy and resistant and meaningful to interact 728 00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:56,960 against. Yeah, 100%. 729 00:45:57,800 --> 00:46:00,160 So when it comes to I mean, y'all have quite a bit of 730 00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:04,080 experience in, you know, body therapy, V card and Dance Gin 731 00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:06,800 and then all just the cumulative experience that you'll have when 732 00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:10,160 it comes to people that are, you know, doing weight training, 733 00:46:10,160 --> 00:46:13,040 that they are using resistance loads, they are working out. 734 00:46:13,440 --> 00:46:15,160 Where else can they place emphasis? 735 00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:18,000 I mean, what what, what is the most bang for their buck? 736 00:46:18,000 --> 00:46:20,640 Is it getting routine deep tissue massage? 737 00:46:20,640 --> 00:46:23,600 Is it going to a chiropractor? Is it doing, you know, 738 00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:27,360 structured mobility work? What are some tangibles that are 739 00:46:27,680 --> 00:46:30,520 low hanging fruit that are going to provide, you know, the the 740 00:46:30,520 --> 00:46:35,600 most bang for the buck? So not my sorry, this is almost 741 00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:40,400 sort of, I'm almost say not my sort of outside my scope of 742 00:46:40,400 --> 00:46:42,240 practice, but I'm going to say it anyway. 743 00:46:42,400 --> 00:46:49,080 So I'm always looking for is there something that I can 744 00:46:49,080 --> 00:46:56,600 remove or not do for example, that will then as a result mean 745 00:46:56,600 --> 00:47:00,560 that I don't have to add practices to compensate, right? 746 00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:03,200 So. So what I'm getting at here is 747 00:47:03,720 --> 00:47:11,320 when I do exercise with those loads, I tend to, you know, I 748 00:47:11,320 --> 00:47:18,040 don't go to failure or quite to Max. 749 00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:21,320 I don't go to failure. I don't go to Max performance 750 00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:27,600 too often. I almost always leave enough in 751 00:47:27,600 --> 00:47:32,480 the tank at the end of any session because I know that if I 752 00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:35,640 take, if I go to the end of my tank, either in terms of my 753 00:47:35,640 --> 00:47:41,160 strength or or my cardiovascular capacity, I've now just put a 754 00:47:41,160 --> 00:47:46,520 really big recovery demand on my mind and my body, which either 755 00:47:46,520 --> 00:47:48,400 needs. Which means I'm going to need 756 00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:52,920 more rest, more nutrition, more body work, more something 757 00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:55,640 because because I went past a limit. 758 00:47:55,640 --> 00:47:59,360 If you look at animals in nature like I, I loved Kelly Starr. 759 00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:00,840 It's book, I don't know if you've ever heard of it, called 760 00:48:00,840 --> 00:48:02,960 Becoming a supple leopard. Are you aware of that one, 761 00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:06,480 Robert? Yeah, so it's called becoming a 762 00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:08,880 supple leopard. And when you think of the 763 00:48:08,880 --> 00:48:15,560 mightiest predators in nature, they only go to their maximum 764 00:48:15,560 --> 00:48:21,800 capacity when it's absolutely necessary either to hunt and 765 00:48:21,800 --> 00:48:27,720 kill, to flee and survive, or to beat a competitor. 766 00:48:29,080 --> 00:48:32,480 And the rest of the time they are moving, well, they are 767 00:48:32,480 --> 00:48:35,040 resting. And so I like to think of myself 768 00:48:35,040 --> 00:48:37,320 as that supple leopard. So for me, I just want to say 769 00:48:37,320 --> 00:48:40,680 like the thing that I really want to offer is if your 770 00:48:40,680 --> 00:48:45,360 training revolves around too much fatigue, whether it's in 771 00:48:45,400 --> 00:48:47,760 again, your strength capacity, your power capacity or your 772 00:48:47,760 --> 00:48:51,640 current vascular capacity, there are ways to design your 773 00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:56,320 programming where you get a huge amount of benefit and forward 774 00:48:56,320 --> 00:49:00,040 progress and growth and whatever, you know, kind of 775 00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:03,960 metric you're trying to increase without always taking the body 776 00:49:03,960 --> 00:49:05,400 to a place where it's in deficit. 777 00:49:05,640 --> 00:49:06,880 And that's that's what I would say. 778 00:49:07,640 --> 00:49:10,760 Yeah, that makes sense. I feel like they're like I, I 779 00:49:10,760 --> 00:49:13,920 try and train with a really high degree of intensity, but I try 780 00:49:13,920 --> 00:49:18,160 to exclude excessive, you know, quote UN quote junk volume 781 00:49:18,160 --> 00:49:20,760 because I feel like that is often times what leads to, you 782 00:49:20,760 --> 00:49:23,960 know, increased recovery times. So like I've structured my 783 00:49:23,960 --> 00:49:27,040 training around like a five day full body split, but I'm only 784 00:49:27,040 --> 00:49:30,160 training like I'm training everybody part once a day, five 785 00:49:30,160 --> 00:49:33,640 days a week, but I'm only doing one exercise for that body part 786 00:49:33,640 --> 00:49:38,080 as opposed to doing, you know, 6-7 exercises, 4 legs in one 787 00:49:38,080 --> 00:49:40,200 session. And I feel like the increased 788 00:49:40,200 --> 00:49:44,320 frequency is beneficial, but I'm having ample recovery time from 789 00:49:44,320 --> 00:49:46,600 a given session that it's not overloading things, so that 790 00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:52,960 makes sense. Yeah, yeah, totally. 791 00:49:54,200 --> 00:49:59,800 I I love what you shared. Cardin and Robert, what do you 792 00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:05,000 do for self-care to to feel good, to feel better, to feel 793 00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:08,800 good? Like what really sort of refills 794 00:50:09,280 --> 00:50:13,800 your tank other than spending time with your your child and 795 00:50:14,200 --> 00:50:16,720 yeah. I'm pretty bad about self-care 796 00:50:16,720 --> 00:50:18,440 honestly. That is definitely one of my 797 00:50:18,560 --> 00:50:20,720 short stroll. I do like I'm actually getting a 798 00:50:21,240 --> 00:50:25,160 deep tissue massage tomorrow. I do that like once a month, so 799 00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:27,800 probably not frequently enough. I during the winter time I have 800 00:50:27,800 --> 00:50:30,760 a like a stock tank that I do cold plunges and I love doing a 801 00:50:30,760 --> 00:50:33,760 daily cold plunge. That's probably more from a 802 00:50:33,760 --> 00:50:37,000 psychological standpoint than a physiological, but that that's 803 00:50:37,000 --> 00:50:40,200 pretty much it. I don't really have any, you 804 00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:43,800 know, structured self-care routines, per Southeast. 805 00:50:45,640 --> 00:50:49,320 Yeah, and if you could like what? 806 00:50:50,320 --> 00:50:54,320 Let's say you had the time and it was necessary and you had to 807 00:50:54,320 --> 00:50:56,280 choose one thing. What would it be? 808 00:50:57,000 --> 00:51:02,760 I would go outside in the morning and sit in the grass 809 00:51:03,080 --> 00:51:07,480 barefoot, drink a cup of coffee and read a book unrelated to 810 00:51:07,480 --> 00:51:12,200 anything to do with work or business or just like a pleasure 811 00:51:12,200 --> 00:51:13,640 read basically. That's probably. 812 00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:16,480 Oh man, how good is that? How good does that sound, Jen? 813 00:51:17,360 --> 00:51:20,000 Yeah, Robert, you just made me smile ear to ear. 814 00:51:20,000 --> 00:51:24,720 So, but for me, you know, how did your body, you know, I, it's 815 00:51:24,720 --> 00:51:27,880 so funny, Robert, as you were saying that I, I didn't even 816 00:51:28,240 --> 00:51:33,080 have to see your face or look at your body posture, but I can 817 00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:36,880 tell that it something shifted you the tone of your voice. 818 00:51:36,880 --> 00:51:40,000 You were talking slower. You were like on a different 819 00:51:40,400 --> 00:51:46,040 sort of a different level. And what happens when we commit 820 00:51:46,040 --> 00:51:49,240 to self-care? You know one thing a day or you 821 00:51:49,240 --> 00:51:52,320 know, if you don't have anything ever, you can start with one 822 00:51:52,320 --> 00:51:55,520 thing a week and see how you know how you can try and fit it 823 00:51:55,520 --> 00:51:57,120 in. But committing to self-care 824 00:51:57,120 --> 00:51:59,360 means committing to your nervous system. 825 00:51:59,360 --> 00:52:02,560 It means giving your nervous system the chance to like slow 826 00:52:02,560 --> 00:52:07,640 down and actually restore. You know, be the orchestra 827 00:52:07,640 --> 00:52:11,960 director of all of the organisms in your body that it wants to 828 00:52:11,960 --> 00:52:15,720 be, not just at night when you're sleeping, which is super 829 00:52:15,720 --> 00:52:20,160 important, but also in these pockets in your day where you're 830 00:52:20,160 --> 00:52:24,320 actually telling your brain now we can restore now. 831 00:52:24,320 --> 00:52:29,000 We can relax now. And because, you know, for a lot 832 00:52:29,000 --> 00:52:32,320 of us, it's hard to just relax by relaxing, right? 833 00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:36,280 Because it's really hard nowadays, especially when you 834 00:52:36,280 --> 00:52:38,440 have your own business and you have goals. 835 00:52:38,440 --> 00:52:41,040 And you know, as Carden said was saying, when you're not 836 00:52:41,040 --> 00:52:46,160 necessarily aware of why you're pushing so hard, it's hard to 837 00:52:46,160 --> 00:52:51,200 just relax by relax. Yeah, no, I totally agree. 838 00:52:51,200 --> 00:52:53,000 I think you've got in. Your day, Robert. 839 00:52:53,000 --> 00:52:55,600 I Yeah. Oh, we were cutting out a little 840 00:52:55,600 --> 00:52:56,680 bit there. What was that last thing you 841 00:52:56,680 --> 00:53:01,240 were saying? No, no, I was, I was just, yeah, 842 00:53:01,320 --> 00:53:04,080 if you could commit to the that one thing, you know, your 843 00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:10,040 nervous system will really, really have the chance to find 844 00:53:10,040 --> 00:53:13,880 some ease in your day. And that's really important for, 845 00:53:14,120 --> 00:53:18,760 for everything for muscle growth and repair, you know, from that 846 00:53:18,920 --> 00:53:23,200 to your heart, to your brain health, to your organ health, to 847 00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:28,840 your hormone levels, cortisol, just everything in your body. 848 00:53:29,360 --> 00:53:31,880 No, I totally, completely agree. I'm actually, I'm going to 849 00:53:31,880 --> 00:53:37,920 Brazil for 10 days on Saturday and I'm going to bring a lots of 850 00:53:37,920 --> 00:53:40,000 work to do there. But I'm going to actually bring 851 00:53:40,400 --> 00:53:43,560 a pleasure book as well and try to carve out some time to 852 00:53:43,560 --> 00:53:48,080 actually do something relaxing so I can hopefully use that trip 853 00:53:48,080 --> 00:53:50,520 as a catalyst to just set the right routines in motion for 854 00:53:50,520 --> 00:53:54,840 when I return. Yay. 855 00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:56,960 Amazing. I think that's terrific. 856 00:53:57,040 --> 00:53:59,440 That was such a nice thing. But yeah, I would I would agree 857 00:53:59,440 --> 00:54:04,440 with Jen to the the way the entire body responds to actual 858 00:54:04,440 --> 00:54:08,840 pleasure and rest and joy is probably better than any kind of 859 00:54:09,120 --> 00:54:12,400 like other recovery technique we could suggest. 860 00:54:12,880 --> 00:54:15,040 Yeah, no, that makes total sense 'cause I mean, I'll do these 861 00:54:15,040 --> 00:54:18,200 things like I'll do stretch work and I'll, I'll, you know, use 862 00:54:18,200 --> 00:54:20,000 the cross balls and I'll foam roll. 863 00:54:20,000 --> 00:54:23,000 I'll do stuff like this sporadically whenever I feel the 864 00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:25,920 need. And it's, it's always fleeting. 865 00:54:25,920 --> 00:54:28,200 Like, yeah, I probably should be more consistent with doing it, 866 00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:31,680 but I don't ever really feel, you know, significantly 867 00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:33,960 different afterwards, if that makes sense. 868 00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:37,840 And and one more thing, have you know, have you all ever met an 869 00:54:38,120 --> 00:54:41,040 an animal other than a human that needs to stretch or use a 870 00:54:41,040 --> 00:54:43,040 foam roller? That's a good point. 871 00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:45,040 That's a good point. Right. 872 00:54:46,440 --> 00:54:48,520 So I just just want to put it out there. 873 00:54:48,560 --> 00:54:52,400 It's usually because it's the only animals that are actually 874 00:54:52,400 --> 00:54:55,720 stressed out and have physical problems like humans are ones 875 00:54:55,720 --> 00:54:59,560 that live with humans and especially dysregulated humans. 876 00:54:59,840 --> 00:55:02,000 And you've seen it. Who here knows that anxious 877 00:55:02,000 --> 00:55:05,120 person who has an anxious dog? Yeah, no, it's a good point. 878 00:55:05,560 --> 00:55:09,120 It's a good point. I feel like we as a species have 879 00:55:09,320 --> 00:55:11,720 we're we're so smart and so dumb at the same time. 880 00:55:14,160 --> 00:55:17,000 Yes, Sir. That that is the truth. 881 00:55:17,880 --> 00:55:19,440 Well, tell me. I want to be respectful of 882 00:55:19,440 --> 00:55:20,760 y'all's time. We're almost an hour in here, 883 00:55:20,760 --> 00:55:23,760 but tell me about so you got the book, but you've also got a 884 00:55:24,080 --> 00:55:26,720 program course. Like talk to me about y'all's 885 00:55:26,800 --> 00:55:28,760 umbrella of different activities. 886 00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:34,600 Yeah, so we have. We had. 887 00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:37,400 Cardin, did you want to go? Nope, Nope. 888 00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:42,160 I'm happy to listen. We have a company called Somia 889 00:55:42,160 --> 00:55:46,920 Robert, and it's this wonderful platform for healing. 890 00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:51,840 You can find us on Instagram at Somia International and at Somia 891 00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:56,680 we have a program called Heal and Heal is a nervous system 892 00:55:56,680 --> 00:56:01,280 regulating program that gives you all the knowledge and tools 893 00:56:01,800 --> 00:56:04,920 and healing that you need to recover from a chronic illness 894 00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:08,160 like anxiety, depression, chronic fatigue syndrome, 895 00:56:08,160 --> 00:56:12,720 fibromyalgia, autoimmune disorders, long COVID, chronic 896 00:56:12,720 --> 00:56:16,600 Lyme, chronic headaches. So from a chronic actual 897 00:56:16,600 --> 00:56:23,480 diagnosis to to chronic symptoms like gut sensitivities, you 898 00:56:23,480 --> 00:56:26,520 know, not responding to supplements or being really 899 00:56:26,520 --> 00:56:30,080 sensitive to certain foods all of a sudden not knowing why. 900 00:56:31,040 --> 00:56:37,320 Also things skin things like acne or psoriasis flare ups and 901 00:56:37,320 --> 00:56:41,880 all of these illnesses and symptoms are under this big 902 00:56:41,880 --> 00:56:44,480 umbrella of nervous system dysregulation. 903 00:56:44,480 --> 00:56:48,200 So rooted in that mind body connection being out of balance. 904 00:56:48,840 --> 00:56:54,480 And we teach you everything you need to know in 10 modules, how 905 00:56:54,480 --> 00:56:58,600 to heal yourself. And we've had over 2000 students 906 00:56:58,600 --> 00:57:02,800 take the program and countless hundreds and hundreds of full 907 00:57:02,800 --> 00:57:05,840 recoveries. And then we have our book, The 908 00:57:05,840 --> 00:57:09,520 Secret Language of the Body, which just came out. 909 00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:14,320 And it's already a number one best seller in the US, Canada, 910 00:57:14,360 --> 00:57:19,080 UK, and it's being translated in a bunch of languages. 911 00:57:19,080 --> 00:57:23,920 And we couldn't be more excited. And you can find Carden and I on 912 00:57:23,920 --> 00:57:27,600 Instagram. I'm I am Jen Man, and Carden is 913 00:57:27,600 --> 00:57:30,000 Carden Rabin. Awesome, awesome. 914 00:57:30,000 --> 00:57:31,680 I probably should have asked this in the very beginning. 915 00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:33,600 I'm kind of going backwards here, but how did y'all's two 916 00:57:33,600 --> 00:57:35,520 paths cross? Like how did y'all get in 917 00:57:35,520 --> 00:57:38,440 contact with each other? Oh, oh, this one's this is a 918 00:57:38,440 --> 00:57:42,240 good one. So, you know, it's, it's made, 919 00:57:42,280 --> 00:57:45,200 you know, we've, we've been talking this whole podcast a lot 920 00:57:45,200 --> 00:57:47,480 about, you know, nervous system, but also about being type A, 921 00:57:47,560 --> 00:57:50,200 being workers, being people that achieve all the time. 922 00:57:50,760 --> 00:57:56,480 And something that I, that I also love to reflect on is how 923 00:57:56,480 --> 00:58:00,920 many of the most special things in our lives kind of happened to 924 00:58:00,920 --> 00:58:05,080 us, arrived, stumbled into US instead of us just like kind of 925 00:58:05,080 --> 00:58:09,280 grasping or seizing, you know, like that's just those, those 926 00:58:09,280 --> 00:58:12,040 synchronicity moments that propel us forward. 927 00:58:12,040 --> 00:58:15,760 But it had nothing to do with kind of what we were doing. 928 00:58:15,800 --> 00:58:18,920 And I find those moments to be magical. 929 00:58:18,920 --> 00:58:24,000 And so back in 20 in the winter of 2021, Robert, do you remember 930 00:58:24,040 --> 00:58:28,000 the, the, the app clubhouse that was around for a hot minute? 931 00:58:28,000 --> 00:58:29,440 Yeah, yeah. Is it still around? 932 00:58:31,040 --> 00:58:33,480 Who knows, right? Obviously, I mean, it may be, 933 00:58:33,480 --> 00:58:37,280 but it doesn't exist in any meaningful way anymore. 934 00:58:37,280 --> 00:58:39,960 But during that, during that time where it was sort of the 935 00:58:39,960 --> 00:58:44,920 the IT thing, I was on there with a colleague of mine, 936 00:58:44,920 --> 00:58:46,440 wonderful man named Charlie Merrill. 937 00:58:46,440 --> 00:58:50,680 And we were hosting a, a room called Ask the Pain Guys where 938 00:58:50,680 --> 00:58:53,760 we were discussing and helping people solve their chronic pain 939 00:58:53,760 --> 00:58:56,880 issues from this nervous system and brain centred approach. 940 00:58:57,680 --> 00:59:05,640 And I'm here in America and Jen is over in London and she 941 00:59:05,640 --> 00:59:12,040 happens to log into the app and find her way into the room that 942 00:59:12,880 --> 00:59:15,160 Charlie and I are having our chat with. 943 00:59:15,640 --> 00:59:18,880 And she's like totally on board with everything we're talking 944 00:59:18,880 --> 00:59:21,000 about. She has her own experience of 945 00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:25,600 how nervous system centred work is, helped her recover from 946 00:59:25,600 --> 00:59:28,520 being literally bed bound for a year and a half of the 947 00:59:28,520 --> 00:59:31,560 constellation of chronic illnesses to having her life 948 00:59:31,560 --> 00:59:34,360 back. And so we bump in, we bump into 949 00:59:34,400 --> 00:59:37,960 each other absolutely randomly in this brief moment on 950 00:59:37,960 --> 00:59:41,600 Clubhouse. And then we end up following up 951 00:59:41,600 --> 00:59:45,480 with each other on Instagram in Adm just to continue to kind of 952 00:59:46,000 --> 00:59:49,000 talk shop. And literally the rest is 953 00:59:49,000 --> 00:59:51,000 history. Went from this random, never 954 00:59:51,000 --> 00:59:53,600 should have happened in a million years encounter on an 955 00:59:53,600 --> 00:59:59,040 app that barely exists anymore to becoming friends, partners, 956 00:59:59,120 --> 01:00:01,680 colleagues, business owners and authors together. 957 01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:04,720 Awesome Fate is pretty cool like that. 958 01:00:04,720 --> 01:00:06,880 Totally unpredictable, but moves mountains. 959 01:00:07,520 --> 01:00:09,760 Yes, I love it. I love it. 960 01:00:10,720 --> 01:00:13,240 Well, I will most definitely link out to everything that you 961 01:00:13,240 --> 01:00:15,440 threw out there. Make it easy for people to find. 962 01:00:15,440 --> 01:00:16,960 Y'all. I'm going to be following along 963 01:00:16,960 --> 01:00:19,760 as well. I'm super excited about the book 964 01:00:19,760 --> 01:00:21,040 launch. Congrats again on that. 965 01:00:21,120 --> 01:00:23,240 I published a book as well and it's no small feat. 966 01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:25,480 So kudos to y'all for putting that together. 967 01:00:25,720 --> 01:00:27,720 I hope it's a wild success for you. 968 01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:30,920 Amazing. Thank you so much. 969 01:00:30,920 --> 01:00:34,160 Thank you and congratulations on your book as well. 970 01:00:34,160 --> 01:00:37,440 I'm I'm definitely going to check that out. 971 01:00:37,720 --> 01:00:39,760 Appreciate it, appreciate it. Well, until next time, y'all 972 01:00:39,760 --> 01:00:41,280 have a great one. There's everything I can do for 973 01:00:41,280 --> 01:00:42,360 y'all. Definitely let me know. 974 01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:44,680 Keep me in the loop and keep keep changing lines. 975 01:00:44,680 --> 01:00:46,520 Keep keep being the supple leopards. 976 01:00:47,480 --> 01:00:49,000 Heck yeah. And you keep being present with 977 01:00:49,000 --> 01:00:51,360 that son. Will do 100% and y'all as well 978 01:00:51,640 --> 01:00:52,160 take care.