1 00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:11,480 Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Love Quest International 2 00:00:11,480 --> 00:00:14,600 Church podcast, where we seek to love all nations, equip the 3 00:00:14,600 --> 00:00:17,560 church, mobilize the equipped, and serve all. 4 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:21,080 We're super glad you're joining us from whenever and wherever 5 00:00:21,080 --> 00:00:23,760 you're at in the world. Welcome to the family to get 6 00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:26,440 your Bibles ready, get some water, get some coffee, maybe 7 00:00:26,440 --> 00:00:28,640 some tea, and get ready to receive. 8 00:00:28,960 --> 00:00:39,080 Let's get into it. Everyone say maximum blessing. 9 00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:42,880 Yeah, if you're going to get blessed, get it all. 10 00:00:44,760 --> 00:00:47,640 Today we're talking about baptism. 11 00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:50,400 We have our baptisms today. Amen. 12 00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:56,800 Give a hand clap. And one thing we teach about in 13 00:00:56,800 --> 00:00:59,240 baptism that whatever God got for you get it all. 14 00:00:59,920 --> 00:01:02,560 I'm the guy that if I go to McDonald's and I was supposed to 15 00:01:02,560 --> 00:01:04,519 get napkins, I want napkins in the bag. 16 00:01:04,519 --> 00:01:08,120 Even if I never use them, if it's come with it, I want it OK. 17 00:01:08,120 --> 00:01:11,160 I want the salt, the pepper. I want everything that comes 18 00:01:11,160 --> 00:01:15,000 with it, right? Get it all. 19 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:19,240 Don't just get part of the blessing, get it all get maximum 20 00:01:19,240 --> 00:01:20,040 blessing. Amen. 21 00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:23,560 Because God's pouring out himself in a maximum way today. 22 00:01:23,560 --> 00:01:26,520 I'm going to put I want you to strap up for an emotional ride, 23 00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:32,560 say emotional ride because we going to go there today and and 24 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:34,760 I invite you to be open to the emotion. 25 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:38,800 Don't fight it, don't press it, don't try to constrain it. 26 00:01:39,720 --> 00:01:43,480 Don't worry about what happens. We have people in our house that 27 00:01:43,480 --> 00:01:46,880 are praying right now for God's will be to be done in each one 28 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:49,560 of our lives. Our prayer team, we got 29 00:01:49,560 --> 00:01:52,320 ministers in the house and clergy in the house that can 30 00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:55,040 govern that atmosphere in ways to make sure we stay safe. 31 00:01:55,880 --> 00:01:58,000 OK? So whatever you need to 32 00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:00,240 experience, let it experience it because why? 33 00:02:00,240 --> 00:02:03,320 This could be your time and this could be the very experience 34 00:02:03,320 --> 00:02:06,760 God's trying to register in you to get you through a place of 35 00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:11,960 breakthrough and on your way in a more glorious fashion, OK? 36 00:02:12,320 --> 00:02:14,920 Don't be afraid of the motion. Don't be afraid of the thoughts. 37 00:02:14,920 --> 00:02:17,320 Don't be afraid and don't negotiate with your own soul, 38 00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:20,080 OK? What do I mean? 39 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:24,720 Don't make something lesser when it's bigger, OK? 40 00:02:25,280 --> 00:02:27,560 Don't make a big hurt, a small hurt because you're trying to 41 00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,880 negotiate with your soul. And well, I don't want to make 42 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:33,160 it seem like it was that or it's ugly, OK? 43 00:02:33,280 --> 00:02:37,240 Don't do that. Let God come and let you be 44 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:46,000 honest today. Hey, man, so we're talking about 45 00:02:46,680 --> 00:02:53,360 my prayer is this that at the end of our message today, the 46 00:02:53,360 --> 00:02:57,880 God who opens hearts while the word is being spoken is going to 47 00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:00,840 wash over you, much like the waters of baptism are going to 48 00:03:00,840 --> 00:03:02,520 wash over our folks getting baptized today. 49 00:03:02,520 --> 00:03:06,520 And since himself is going to be washed out and washed away 50 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:11,760 today. So my subject today in our 51 00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:13,720 family, don't put the top slide up yet. 52 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:15,040 We're talking about family matters. 53 00:03:15,040 --> 00:03:18,160 Everyone says family matters. That's the series we're in. 54 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:21,240 Pastor set it up perfectly and want to be talking about 55 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:24,280 different elements of family as we go throughout this series. 56 00:03:24,680 --> 00:03:27,480 And the topic I want to share today, I'm charged with sharing 57 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:32,080 today is this regarding family. Forgiving the family that hurt 58 00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:42,280 you, forgiving the family that hurt you, that's family matters. 59 00:03:43,840 --> 00:03:47,520 And sometimes you got to start there, you know, you got to 60 00:03:47,520 --> 00:03:49,200 start. You got to dig the hole first 61 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:52,600 before you put the post in. You got to dig the hole to put 62 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,960 the foundation of the building in before you build on top of 63 00:03:54,960 --> 00:03:58,080 it. You know, you don't want a house 64 00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:00,000 go, you can clan go won't help them. 65 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:01,480 Clan clap. It's all right, go ahead. 66 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:08,920 It's like doing a rental when the walls are messed up and 67 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:12,440 rather than fix the walls, people just put new drywall over 68 00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:14,960 it. You walk in and it looks fine, 69 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:18,120 but just wait 2-3 years and let the mess underneath begin to 70 00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:21,720 come out. And now you're upset that folks 71 00:04:21,720 --> 00:04:23,720 covered it versus really dealt with it. 72 00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:26,400 Sometimes this is the stuff you got to deal with first before 73 00:04:26,400 --> 00:04:30,320 you do all this. Shout out to my Northern Soul 74 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:32,800 Ministry team. They told me a lot about 75 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:34,440 renovation and building. Amen. 76 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:36,120 So forgiving the family that hurt you. 77 00:04:36,120 --> 00:04:37,760 The first thing we want to talk about is this. 78 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:43,280 Our goal today is to expose, equip and excite, OK? 79 00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:46,720 We're going to expose some things about this topic, then 80 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,440 we're going to equip you to deal with it and then we're going to 81 00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:52,120 release an excitement. Excitement is not an emotional 82 00:04:52,120 --> 00:04:56,280 state of agitation. It is a more of a, a desire and 83 00:04:56,280 --> 00:05:00,440 a willingness to move to action. We're going to excite you, going 84 00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:04,160 to encourage you to move to action as it relates to this 85 00:05:04,160 --> 00:05:07,000 topic in the subject matter, and we're going to have you do it 86 00:05:07,000 --> 00:05:10,280 with great joy. OK, Now, excitement in this 87 00:05:10,280 --> 00:05:12,840 topic doesn't mean you're just always cheering, but it means 88 00:05:12,840 --> 00:05:15,760 you are fully engaging as you move to action Amen. 89 00:05:17,920 --> 00:05:28,320 So as we look at family, there's a lot that goes into this family 90 00:05:28,320 --> 00:05:32,000 is one of the biggest things that we, we have understanding 91 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:37,520 about, but we don't talk about we, we just like, well, you, you 92 00:05:37,840 --> 00:05:40,680 supposed to get it. You're just supposed to 93 00:05:40,680 --> 00:05:46,040 understand it, right? A lot of families problems, a 94 00:05:46,040 --> 00:05:49,240 lot of the hurts that come that you have to be forgiven for, 95 00:05:49,240 --> 00:05:52,040 forgiven of come from your expectations. 96 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:55,840 So the question is this, who told you that? 97 00:05:57,080 --> 00:05:59,920 Whatever your idea about what you expected from family, who 98 00:05:59,920 --> 00:06:03,440 told you that? Where do family expectations 99 00:06:03,440 --> 00:06:06,360 come from? Why did you expect that? 100 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:10,400 Forgiveness suggests that there's been a brokenness that 101 00:06:10,400 --> 00:06:13,240 happened, but brokenness suggests that there was a 102 00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:17,280 wholeness at one time. There was an expectation at one 103 00:06:17,280 --> 00:06:20,960 time, but it got broken. What made you, who told you that 104 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:23,200 was the proper expectation to have about family? 105 00:06:25,280 --> 00:06:27,360 You have to examine that. Where did it come from? 106 00:06:28,280 --> 00:06:30,520 Because sometimes that's really the problem. 107 00:06:31,280 --> 00:06:33,400 It's not what you're experiencing, but you've gotten 108 00:06:33,440 --> 00:06:37,160 a picture from romantic comedies and what you see on television 109 00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:40,560 from watching other people's families from outside the house 110 00:06:40,640 --> 00:06:45,160 rather than inside the house. Sometimes that's where you get 111 00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:49,360 your expectations from. And the issue with your hurt is 112 00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:52,520 not even maybe what you experienced, but it did not line 113 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:55,320 up with the expectation that you formulated. 114 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:59,760 And if you and if you and if you formed your expectation 115 00:06:59,760 --> 00:07:04,160 improperly, you've already set yourself up for failure or to be 116 00:07:04,160 --> 00:07:08,640 hurt in a tremendous way. Where do family expectations 117 00:07:08,640 --> 00:07:09,840 come from? They come from movies, 118 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:11,520 television. They come from what you've 119 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:13,480 experienced. They come from social media. 120 00:07:13,680 --> 00:07:16,880 They come from what you watch. They come from why you are 121 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:20,760 waiting for your friend to come down to go out and play and you 122 00:07:20,760 --> 00:07:23,120 hear their parents in the house arguing. 123 00:07:23,440 --> 00:07:27,520 They come from all of that. OK, So we have to deal with 124 00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:30,000 expectations. The question next question is 125 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:34,760 this, what should family do? Hurt involves broken order. 126 00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:39,160 First off, there's a broken order that's happened. 127 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:43,000 Now the kind of family hurt I'm talking about, it's not just the 128 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,240 relational hurt, but the structural hurt. 129 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:48,720 What's relational hurt? Relational hurt is when some 130 00:07:48,720 --> 00:07:50,680 people acting together relationship. 131 00:07:50,880 --> 00:07:55,200 I do something to you and you see able to hear it and see it 132 00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:58,280 and you're in a position to respond or protect yourself. 133 00:07:58,520 --> 00:07:59,760 But I do something that hurts you. 134 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:05,760 Relational hurt, structural hurt is I'm a father or a father 135 00:08:05,800 --> 00:08:10,240 abuses, a child sexually abuses or physically abuses. 136 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:11,520 That's also what we're talking about. 137 00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:16,000 That's a structural break. The child doesn't know. 138 00:08:16,000 --> 00:08:18,600 The child is not incapable of defending themselves. 139 00:08:18,800 --> 00:08:22,000 There's a broken order. There's the expectation that 140 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:25,320 families should do things. Fathers should not molest 141 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:27,280 children. Mothers should not molest 142 00:08:27,280 --> 00:08:29,640 children. Fathers should not do this. 143 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:32,559 Mothers should not do this because of the nature of 144 00:08:32,559 --> 00:08:34,600 children as they find them ready. 145 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:40,440 Fathers should not abuse their elderly parents either. 146 00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:43,520 Forgiving the family to hurt you. 147 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:48,480 OK, so there's a sense of what should family do? 148 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:51,320 Where does that expectation come from? 149 00:08:51,480 --> 00:08:54,640 Hurt involves broken order. There's a sense of something 150 00:08:54,640 --> 00:08:57,880 should have been done a certain way and the order was broken. 151 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:04,720 Next question, What do you expect of family? 152 00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:09,120 What do you expect? It kind of Harkins back to the 153 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:10,800 first one. What do you expect? 154 00:09:12,840 --> 00:09:15,920 What do you expect of them? Why am I saying that? 155 00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:19,040 Because sometimes your hurt comes not from what family did, 156 00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:21,360 but again, from what you put on them. 157 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:29,520 And particularly when you didn't tell them, you just posed a no. 158 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:33,760 Because if you love me, you would just know. 159 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:41,400 And it's really interesting that we feel that way about people. 160 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,800 But when? But when people do that to us 161 00:09:45,800 --> 00:09:50,320 and say, John, you just posed to know, My response is how was I 162 00:09:50,320 --> 00:09:52,560 supposed to know? Right. 163 00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:55,080 When it's on the other side, we can tell people. 164 00:09:55,080 --> 00:09:57,040 I can tell my wife, you just posed to know. 165 00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:00,040 But then she tells me what, John, you supposed to know. 166 00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:01,720 My response is, how am I supposed to know? 167 00:10:02,440 --> 00:10:05,000 Why is it that, oh, that's OK for me, but not OK for her? 168 00:10:06,680 --> 00:10:09,360 What do you expect? The family That becomes really 169 00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:16,120 important as well. OK, I got some technology issues 170 00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:19,520 here. So next slide, what do you 171 00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:22,200 expect? Why do you expect things of 172 00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:26,200 family? So first one is what, the other 173 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:30,200 one's why. What is the objective aspect? 174 00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:34,920 Why is the motivation? And this is important because 175 00:10:34,920 --> 00:10:36,600 this speaks to whether you love me or not. 176 00:10:38,560 --> 00:10:43,160 The why It speaks to what? The motivation for those things. 177 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:47,760 The why. OK, yeah. 178 00:10:48,480 --> 00:10:52,160 See if you're see if you can download that for me. 179 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:55,160 The why do you expect things of family hurt involves misplaced 180 00:10:55,160 --> 00:11:01,920 expectations. Next, why do you feel justified 181 00:11:01,920 --> 00:11:05,320 in your anger at family hurt? This is what keeps you in a 182 00:11:05,320 --> 00:11:09,440 broken position. I'm stuck. 183 00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,360 This is why people feel justified. 184 00:11:11,680 --> 00:11:13,560 I'm stuck. I didn't ask for this. 185 00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:15,760 Pastor did a message on that a while ago. 186 00:11:15,760 --> 00:11:18,840 It was really powerful. I didn't ask for this and I 187 00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:21,920 can't do anything about it, so they owe me. 188 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:23,480 I didn't ask to be in this family. 189 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:27,000 I was just born into it. I didn't ask for this. 190 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:32,200 It's just happened to me. I feel justified in my anger. 191 00:11:32,200 --> 00:11:34,600 Why? Because I didn't ask for it. 192 00:11:35,920 --> 00:11:40,440 Therefore, if I'm angry or if I'm hurt or I'm upset, I have a 193 00:11:40,440 --> 00:11:45,840 right to be. This is why people get stuck in 194 00:11:45,840 --> 00:11:48,960 family hurt and family is in a unique way. 195 00:11:48,960 --> 00:11:50,320 Why? Because you were never asked to 196 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:55,360 be born into your family. You could choose the job, you 197 00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:58,000 can choose the spouse. Even I know spouse is part of 198 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:02,880 family, but but in terms of the, the the the parent child 199 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:04,840 relationship, you didn't ask for that. 200 00:12:05,720 --> 00:12:08,960 And that justification of that hurt can sometimes cause you to 201 00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:13,360 feel that you are justified and right and cause you to dig in 202 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:16,000 and to stay in and not be released from it. 203 00:12:16,440 --> 00:12:19,880 I'm not going to move out. I'm not going to forgive unless 204 00:12:19,920 --> 00:12:24,200 I'm paid in full. Somebody owes me and somebody's 205 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:26,560 going to pay for any forgiveness is given. 206 00:12:27,320 --> 00:12:44,520 I'm justified and I was wronged. Now it's time to really begin to 207 00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:48,640 expose the most important part, Amen. 208 00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:52,800 The most important part. You got to recognize that it's 209 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:59,440 bigger than you. It's bigger than you. 210 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:05,000 With all of what I just said being true, we got to expose the 211 00:13:05,000 --> 00:13:08,800 fact that it's bigger than you. It's not just about you. 212 00:13:10,160 --> 00:13:13,560 Even though it may have happened personally to you or you may 213 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:17,680 have been the one who caused hurt personally, it's bigger 214 00:13:17,680 --> 00:13:20,400 than you. It's a spiritual war between 215 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:24,600 kingdoms. Pastor said this on Wednesday. 216 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:26,920 It says this, that you were born into a war. 217 00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:34,000 Genesis 315 says, and I will put enmity between you and the woman 218 00:13:34,560 --> 00:13:36,840 and between your offspring and her offspring. 219 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:41,760 It's a family fight. It's a war you've been born 220 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:43,760 into. It's bigger than you. 221 00:13:45,280 --> 00:13:47,600 Why some of the hurt has happened to in your family 222 00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:51,200 because it was never about you. The enemy that's out to hurt God 223 00:13:51,200 --> 00:13:53,400 was use your family to get back at him. 224 00:13:54,440 --> 00:13:57,840 You ever seen the movie where you stop John? 225 00:13:57,840 --> 00:13:59,480 Too many movies flooding my hair right now. 226 00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:03,840 The movie where the, the, the hero is over there and the, and 227 00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:06,880 the, and the evil person has the family member and they're 228 00:14:06,880 --> 00:14:09,200 holding him hostage and they're threatening like this. 229 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:14,560 Knowing what if I threaten them, you won't do anything to me, or 230 00:14:14,840 --> 00:14:19,400 even if you do something to me, I will hurt them in the process 231 00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:25,080 and therefore hurt you. Families are in the midst of the 232 00:14:25,080 --> 00:14:28,440 war between God and the enemies of God. 233 00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:33,800 It's bigger than you. It's not just about you. 234 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:37,480 So you have to have a bigger perspective about it if you want 235 00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:40,240 to rise above it. If you think it's all about you, 236 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:43,240 you want to stay in that cycle. But if you understand it's 237 00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:46,240 bigger than you, that means you got bigger help to help you 238 00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:54,040 breakthrough. The proximity of the war comes 239 00:14:54,040 --> 00:14:55,840 between your family. That's why we talking about the 240 00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:58,880 family series, Matthew 1036 says. 241 00:14:58,880 --> 00:15:01,440 And the man's enemies will be members of his own household. 242 00:15:02,720 --> 00:15:07,040 That's the proximity of the war. The enemy's trying to show that 243 00:15:07,040 --> 00:15:09,240 love doesn't work because God is love. 244 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,520 And if I can bust up your household, then I can bust up 245 00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:15,040 your bloodline. I can bust up your generations. 246 00:15:15,200 --> 00:15:18,920 I can bust up everything. I'm trying to show that the 247 00:15:18,920 --> 00:15:21,600 enemy's trying to show that love doesn't work, the proximity of 248 00:15:21,600 --> 00:15:23,200 the wars and family relationships. 249 00:15:25,280 --> 00:15:28,760 The only way you're going to win the war is doing it God's way, 250 00:15:32,080 --> 00:15:34,960 Psalm 127 says Except the Lord builds the house. 251 00:15:35,160 --> 00:15:38,600 They that labor in the city, they labor in vain who build it, 252 00:15:38,960 --> 00:15:43,560 except the Lord keeps the city. The watchman wakes put in vain. 253 00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:46,720 Now I highlighted 2 things here. Pastor, put these up or on 254 00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:48,200 Wednesday, you ought to come out on Wednesday. 255 00:15:48,200 --> 00:15:51,840 Do your soul a favor, do your soul in your bloodline a favor. 256 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:54,440 Come out. The Lord builds the house. 257 00:15:55,080 --> 00:15:59,200 But after you build, you got to keep, it's not enough to follow 258 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:00,880 God in building. You got to follow God in 259 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:03,200 keeping. You got to follow God in the 260 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:07,640 maintenance because inevitably there will be disrepair. 261 00:16:07,640 --> 00:16:11,400 That happens if you're using something, if you are vigorously 262 00:16:11,400 --> 00:16:14,120 engaging in your family, you will have scratches, you will 263 00:16:14,120 --> 00:16:17,560 have arguments, you will have beef, you will have brokenness. 264 00:16:17,840 --> 00:16:21,640 You have to learn how God maintains order in the midst of 265 00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:25,240 those things that naturally occur in living life with 266 00:16:25,480 --> 00:16:26,520 family. Amen. 267 00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:32,920 So I want to equip you with this mindset now. 268 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:39,920 Matthew 1037 says this. He who loves and takes pleasure 269 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:46,120 in father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and he who 270 00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:49,720 loves and takes more pleasure in son or daughter more than me is 271 00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:52,840 not worthy of me. You got to have a wholeness 272 00:16:52,840 --> 00:16:54,960 shift and change your expectations. 273 00:16:59,080 --> 00:17:01,640 The way you're able to forgive family that hurts you is to 274 00:17:01,640 --> 00:17:04,800 understand you got to love God more first. 275 00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:11,760 You gotta have your focus on Him first and foremost. 276 00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:16,839 That has to be the supreme thing because as long as you love in 277 00:17:16,839 --> 00:17:19,560 your family or dealing with your family or putting more weight in 278 00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:23,040 your family than your love for God, you will always miss God's 279 00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:27,400 ability to be able to repair and rescue and restore. 280 00:17:27,720 --> 00:17:29,200 The brokenness has come through your family. 281 00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:31,000 So you got to change your expectations. 282 00:17:31,240 --> 00:17:34,000 Are you going to love God more? I told you He's bigger than you. 283 00:17:34,120 --> 00:17:35,840 They did me wrong. I'm justified. 284 00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,840 But are you going to love God more? 285 00:17:38,120 --> 00:17:39,600 They've been doing it for a long time. 286 00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:41,200 But are you going to love God more? 287 00:17:41,280 --> 00:17:44,080 Let's flip it. I've been the cause of hurt and 288 00:17:44,080 --> 00:17:47,840 I can't forgive myself. Are you going to love God more? 289 00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:58,120 It's bigger than you. You got to shift expectation of 290 00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:00,640 loving God first. Matthew 1030. 291 00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:02,760 I believe it says this. And you should love the Lord 292 00:18:02,760 --> 00:18:05,040 your God out of the whole of your heart. 293 00:18:07,400 --> 00:18:10,200 Why is that important? Because it begins with loving 294 00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:18,960 God, not forgiving others. OK, I've I've said this before, 295 00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:25,600 this is God. This is the hurt. 296 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:32,040 I can go away from the hurt, but get no closer to God. 297 00:18:35,360 --> 00:18:38,280 Sometimes how I go away from the hurt can actually put me farther 298 00:18:38,280 --> 00:18:46,440 from God, but it is impossible that when I'm faced with 299 00:18:46,480 --> 00:18:51,040 overwhelming hurt, if even I just take one small step towards 300 00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:53,680 God, I've automatically put the hurt behind. 301 00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:00,960 I don't want to get dramatic, but it's part of my gift set. 302 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:06,400 Even if that step is like it's a crawl on your knees, it don't 303 00:19:06,400 --> 00:19:09,360 feel like a step. It feels like I'm more broken 304 00:19:09,360 --> 00:19:11,960 than I'm whole. Even if you make that towards 305 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:16,960 God, if you fall towards God, if you cry towards God, if you just 306 00:19:17,080 --> 00:19:20,120 put your momentum and your weight towards God, that is a 307 00:19:20,120 --> 00:19:23,040 step towards wholeness and away from this automatically. 308 00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:27,200 So you have to begin to decide I'm a love God first. 309 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,120 And the thing that keeps people from that is that they want to 310 00:19:30,120 --> 00:19:33,080 have a clean house before the the cleaning service comes. 311 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:41,240 I want to clean my house before the person who's equipped and 312 00:19:41,240 --> 00:19:46,160 capable and able into my favorite cleaner, we'll bring 313 00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:51,720 fresh sourdough with her, comes to your house and does the work 314 00:19:51,720 --> 00:19:53,560 for you. They got tools you don't know. 315 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:55,080 They got equipment you don't know. 316 00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:59,040 They got skills you don't know, but too often we want to click 317 00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,240 the house clean first before we love God. 318 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:04,560 God, how can I love you when I'm filled with so full of rage and 319 00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:06,520 anger at my family, what they've done? 320 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:09,160 Let me deal with this first before I say I love you, I don't 321 00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:14,480 want to be hypocritical. God is saying you got to love me 322 00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:15,840 first. You can't deal with that unless 323 00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,800 you love me. There's no way you won't even 324 00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:21,160 handle it unless you deceive my love first. 325 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:24,360 Scripture says this. We love God because He first 326 00:20:24,360 --> 00:20:27,120 loved us. Love was God's idea, not yours. 327 00:20:27,960 --> 00:20:31,720 There's nothing we do in this life at all that was not first 328 00:20:31,720 --> 00:20:36,160 God's idea. What you talking about then? 329 00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:39,640 Sin is God's idea. No, not sin. 330 00:20:39,720 --> 00:20:42,320 Sin is the corruption of what God's idea was. 331 00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:45,520 The idea began with God and the enemies counterfeited it. 332 00:20:45,520 --> 00:20:51,520 Now this is really, really important. 333 00:20:51,880 --> 00:20:55,680 It's the equipment part, right? Love God first, bigger than you. 334 00:20:56,200 --> 00:20:58,280 Look, I'm giving you the tools. Now. 335 00:20:58,280 --> 00:21:00,760 How many of y'all know I can go down to Home Depot and get a bag 336 00:21:00,760 --> 00:21:02,200 of tools that don't make me a builder? 337 00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:05,240 It's a lot harder to apply the tools properly than to go buy 338 00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:07,240 them, right? So the real work is not even 339 00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:09,480 knowing the tools. The real work is applying the 340 00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:11,640 tools. And you can do all the YouTube 341 00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:15,400 that you want and YouTube is good, but there's nothing like 342 00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:20,440 having some a master with you who knows the work and the tools 343 00:21:20,440 --> 00:21:22,480 teach you how to apply the tools. 344 00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:25,000 Let me tell you, don't you come up here. 345 00:21:25,120 --> 00:21:27,720 This is my, this is my, this is my son here. 346 00:21:31,120 --> 00:21:35,160 There's nothing like we're doing work right here as a car Angel. 347 00:21:35,160 --> 00:21:36,320 Act like you're fixing the car Angel. 348 00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:37,600 He's an actor too. He can do this. 349 00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:39,160 Act like you're fixing the car, Agent. 350 00:21:39,680 --> 00:21:42,360 There's one thing to YouTube it. It's something else to have a 351 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:45,440 math to come over here and go like, no, you turn it this way 352 00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:49,560 to be there with you. That's the presence of God 353 00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:52,120 working with you through it. That's what loving God will 354 00:21:52,120 --> 00:21:53,800 allow you to do. You cutting steak, you man, you 355 00:21:53,800 --> 00:21:55,520 ain't fixing the car. Go ahead and sit down there. 356 00:22:04,010 --> 00:22:06,450 But we can cut steak too, though we like we do steak together. 357 00:22:08,210 --> 00:22:12,330 The idea is this and I messed up the I messed up the musician. 358 00:22:12,330 --> 00:22:13,970 So it's like I can't play behind steak man. 359 00:22:13,970 --> 00:22:15,530 I'm gonna let you finish that part. 360 00:22:16,330 --> 00:22:20,210 But the idea is this, getting the tools is not enough. 361 00:22:20,890 --> 00:22:22,810 Saying I have the tools is not enough. 362 00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:26,320 You using the tools based on your own knowledge isn't enough. 363 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:29,120 Now, you may get there eventually, but when you take 364 00:22:29,120 --> 00:22:32,720 the tools you have and you go to the master and you say master, I 365 00:22:32,720 --> 00:22:34,760 need you to teach me to use these tools. 366 00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,160 I need you to walk with me in using these tools. 367 00:22:37,320 --> 00:22:39,560 I need you to move within me as I use these tools. 368 00:22:39,760 --> 00:22:42,880 And when I fumble, I need you to show me how to correct the 369 00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,640 things that I'm doing with these tools and with master. 370 00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:49,400 And I'm giving you permission. If you see me beginning to use a 371 00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:53,000 tool improperly, I'm giving you permission to come in and 372 00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:59,120 correct me before I misuse the tool, whether that's through you 373 00:22:59,120 --> 00:23:03,360 or the people you send in my life quipping. 374 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,520 Here's the biggest part of your quipping. 375 00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:16,480 Luke 2334 and Jesus prayed. Father, forgive them, for they 376 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:21,800 know not what they do. You got to shift your heart 377 00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:27,040 understanding, You got to lift blame, cleanse the venom out. 378 00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:30,560 That's not forgetting responsibility. 379 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:35,440 It's just getting rid of the poison that's going to kill you. 380 00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:41,760 Jesus pray, Father, forgive them, for they're not what they 381 00:23:41,800 --> 00:23:43,760 do. Jesus prayed this prayer when 382 00:23:43,760 --> 00:23:45,800 he's being nailed to a cross between two thieves. 383 00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:49,800 The Romans who had a history of crucifixion and cruelty in many 384 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:51,360 ways. For all the great things they 385 00:23:51,360 --> 00:23:55,720 gave, that empire gave roads and water and and aquaculture, I'm 386 00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:58,120 not going to get into anything deeper than that. 387 00:23:59,960 --> 00:24:02,840 For all of that that they gave, they also were expert in cruelty 388 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:06,240 in many ways. They knew how to crucify people. 389 00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:12,320 They were doing three of them in a row and the and Jesus knew 390 00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:15,600 that the people that put them on the Romans were crucifying them, 391 00:24:15,760 --> 00:24:19,400 but they were doing it at the direction of his friends and his 392 00:24:19,400 --> 00:24:23,320 family and his coworkers and people he went to temple with or 393 00:24:23,320 --> 00:24:26,960 church with or he did life with. They were the ones that were 394 00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:30,520 exhorting the cruelty, though the Romans were executing the 395 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:35,280 cruelty in the midst of that, he says, Father forgive them. 396 00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:36,840 They don't know what they're doing. 397 00:24:36,840 --> 00:24:41,680 Hold on, Player. It seems like they're very 398 00:24:41,680 --> 00:24:43,200 intentional about what they're doing. 399 00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:45,120 He's saying, Father, forgive them. 400 00:24:45,360 --> 00:24:47,440 They really don't know what they're doing. 401 00:24:49,320 --> 00:24:54,320 Now here's the challenge. Is that what God's asking of you 402 00:24:54,320 --> 00:25:00,400 to look at your family? What Jesus tells me from that 403 00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:03,120 picture is this. Maybe your family doesn't really 404 00:25:03,120 --> 00:25:07,760 know what they were doing. I can look for my own family. 405 00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:10,960 He says, well my family, my dad, the ex wives heir to me, he knew 406 00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,960 what he was doing. But when I took a step back, saw 407 00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,480 it was bigger than me and I looked at it through the lens of 408 00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:19,720 God, I began to say God, who is the man versus what did he do to 409 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:23,440 me? And you know what I began to 410 00:25:23,440 --> 00:25:27,040 learn? I learned this about my father 411 00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:33,280 and it's led me to my freedom. I learned that he was born out 412 00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:39,520 of an affair. His mother had an affair with a 413 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,640 married man. His mother got pregnant. 414 00:25:43,360 --> 00:25:46,000 The married man had a family, lived on the other side of town 415 00:25:46,000 --> 00:25:51,240 and didn't care for them in a small town, so everybody knew. 416 00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:54,840 I learned that my father went to high school with his half 417 00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,240 brother, who has never acknowledged his family. 418 00:25:59,560 --> 00:26:03,040 He had no shoes. His brother had shoes, he had to 419 00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:04,960 hustle pool. His brother had everything paid 420 00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:10,160 for. I learned that his mother was a 421 00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:13,120 a numbers runner. That's the illegal lottery. 422 00:26:13,120 --> 00:26:14,880 That's where the people got the ID for the lottery from the 423 00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:16,840 numbers people. No, true. 424 00:26:18,080 --> 00:26:21,680 They legalized it. And then his stepfather was a 425 00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:27,360 drug dealer. And I learned my father really 426 00:26:27,360 --> 00:26:30,280 never knew his father to any degree. 427 00:26:32,760 --> 00:26:38,120 And he did know the Lord, and all he knew was brokenness and 428 00:26:38,120 --> 00:26:42,040 pain and hurting his family. And then he married my mother, 429 00:26:42,040 --> 00:26:45,520 went to college, He was a senior, my mother was a 430 00:26:45,520 --> 00:26:48,280 freshman. They started dating. 431 00:26:48,280 --> 00:26:52,160 He went home to visit her. And my mother's father said this 432 00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:56,560 to him. She's yours now, your 433 00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:59,640 responsibility. They weren't married. 434 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:10,400 My mother's stepfather said she's your responsibility to a 435 00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:12,680 man that don't know anything about family. 436 00:27:15,720 --> 00:27:19,560 And he paid for a college and they moved to Chicago where 437 00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:22,040 there was no family around. They moved for opportunities. 438 00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:27,400 He's discriminated against as an African American in his in his 439 00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:31,680 business, in his career. Had an opportunity to work for 440 00:27:31,680 --> 00:27:34,480 the one of the largest drug store chains in the Midwest at 441 00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:37,160 the time. That gave him the worst stores 442 00:27:37,160 --> 00:27:39,200 all the time because he was black and he knew it. 443 00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:44,760 But my father had a way of turning bad things around for 444 00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:47,600 good. And the stores they gave him 445 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:50,160 became the best stores in the whole company. 446 00:27:52,120 --> 00:27:55,640 And that record continued until just very recently when the 447 00:27:55,680 --> 00:28:00,760 company was sold. But yet he had no relationships, 448 00:28:00,760 --> 00:28:03,120 had no nobody to question, nobody to call on, didn't know 449 00:28:03,120 --> 00:28:08,520 the Lord. And when everything in him now 450 00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:09,760 he's not. He said this. 451 00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:11,680 I don't think he'd mind sharing me sharing this. 452 00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:17,200 He wasn't faithful to my mom. But is it any wonder because he 453 00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:20,680 was born out of unfaithfulness. That's what he knew. 454 00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:26,240 Maybe he had to come to that conclusion. 455 00:28:26,240 --> 00:28:29,400 Otherwise he couldn't stand the the the pain of knowing that 456 00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:34,520 there was a different way. My folks in the headline was he 457 00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:42,000 married 55 years. So my father was working on 458 00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,240 business and working on providing a better life for us 459 00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:46,160 for a lot of reasons. So maybe he didn't have the 460 00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:47,760 nurture and the care that I needed to have. 461 00:28:49,280 --> 00:28:52,920 My father was grew up this way. When they told him you can't, he 462 00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:55,720 said I'll show you. When he said you blankety, 463 00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:57,720 blank, blank, blank, blank. I'm gonna let you fill in the 464 00:28:57,720 --> 00:29:01,560 exhibitives, you can't. He says, I'll show you. 465 00:29:02,760 --> 00:29:05,840 So you motivated me and he raised me with I can't, not 466 00:29:05,840 --> 00:29:11,360 knowing when my father told me I can't, I said OK versus I'll 467 00:29:11,360 --> 00:29:15,640 show you. He did for me. 468 00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:20,480 Would it work for him? And in that context, now I 469 00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:24,120 haven't learned the story. And then being married 55 years 470 00:29:24,120 --> 00:29:31,440 until my mom passed, I said, Oh my goodness, yes, I was hurt. 471 00:29:32,720 --> 00:29:38,800 Yes, he did things that were wrong, but when I understood he 472 00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:41,960 was not equipped to be a man, he was not equipped to be a father, 473 00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:43,600 he was not equipped to be married. 474 00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:45,320 He was not equipped to have peace. 475 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:47,920 He was what he fought against in his career. 476 00:29:48,040 --> 00:29:51,640 He was on his own all alone trying to find his way in the 477 00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:55,400 world from a child and to the time he died at 80 plus. 478 00:29:56,520 --> 00:30:02,680 When I understood that, but he said I'm not going to divorce 479 00:30:02,680 --> 00:30:06,320 your mom and your mom not going to divorce me. 480 00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:13,320 I'm not saying you have marriages that are not good, but 481 00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:16,880 because he wouldn't quit even though he wasn't capable. 482 00:30:19,400 --> 00:30:20,960 I don't know divorce in my family. 483 00:30:24,640 --> 00:30:28,400 So when it get so when it gets hard with my wife quitting any 484 00:30:28,400 --> 00:30:32,840 option and because of relationship, I know the 485 00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:36,040 problems in his background where he came from, I can stand 486 00:30:36,040 --> 00:30:39,240 against those traps that would try to get me into the same 487 00:30:39,240 --> 00:30:43,480 problems with my wife. He passed on to me grit. 488 00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:49,000 He passed on to me an ability to find a way to make a way to not 489 00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:50,760 let anybody limit what you can do. 490 00:30:52,200 --> 00:30:54,760 And it was that entrepreneurial spirit that allowed me to come 491 00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:57,360 to Canada knowing I couldn't work. 492 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:02,200 God will figure it out. God, there's a way, and my 493 00:31:02,200 --> 00:31:05,480 father has taught me tools. He's giving me the courage to 494 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:11,240 say whatever happens, we can get something done and do it 495 00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:16,080 legally. Just to be very clear, Jesus 496 00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:18,000 prayed, Father, forgive them. They don't know what they're 497 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,280 doing. When I saw my father's life and 498 00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:26,080 perspective, then I was able to understand He didn't know what 499 00:31:26,080 --> 00:31:29,560 he was doing. He really didn't know what he 500 00:31:29,560 --> 00:31:33,160 was doing. And I even put it in the context 501 00:31:33,160 --> 00:31:36,400 of this here. He didn't know he was in the 502 00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:38,840 middle of a war between God and his enemy. 503 00:31:39,680 --> 00:31:43,960 He didn't know he was a pawn being used in order to throw 504 00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:46,000 accusations against the holy, loving God. 505 00:31:47,360 --> 00:31:50,240 He didn't know that he was being manipulated in certain actions. 506 00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:56,240 He had responsibility for what he did, but he wasn't just 507 00:31:56,880 --> 00:31:59,320 fighting on his own. There was forces that was trying 508 00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:01,960 to motivate him and move him into destructivity. 509 00:32:04,360 --> 00:32:06,640 Forgive them for they know not what they do. 510 00:32:08,880 --> 00:32:15,410 The next slide here. Next slide. 511 00:32:16,730 --> 00:32:20,050 So now I want to excite you. Keep going. 512 00:32:20,050 --> 00:32:29,440 Now here's the motivating part. We've exposed that how you got 513 00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:31,640 there is because of expectations, false, unmet, 514 00:32:31,880 --> 00:32:34,200 unmaimed, those kind of things. You got to examine that. 515 00:32:35,520 --> 00:32:37,400 We've equipped you to let you know it's bigger than you, and 516 00:32:39,600 --> 00:32:43,040 you have to love God first, even with your pain in your mess. 517 00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:46,960 But in order to deal with the pain in the mess, you got to be 518 00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:48,960 willing to say, God, I'm gonna love you first, even above my 519 00:32:48,960 --> 00:32:52,240 justified hurt. But here's the part that ought 520 00:32:52,240 --> 00:32:55,240 to motivate you. You got to know. 521 00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,520 I also want to say you got to understand that they didn't 522 00:32:57,520 --> 00:33:01,320 really maybe know what they did. If Jesus can say it about them 523 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,240 and he was perfect in love and honor and insight, then surely I 524 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:08,120 can say about my situation. They really didn't know. 525 00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:13,880 And here's the exciting part. When you're able to use these 526 00:33:13,960 --> 00:33:17,720 equipping tools in the way God's ordained them, then you can 527 00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:22,520 release the hurt and the pain and you can release them. 528 00:33:23,760 --> 00:33:29,600 Releasing them can release you. Giving forgiveness can help you 529 00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:32,800 receive forgiveness. Some of the reasons you can't 530 00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:35,520 receive your forgiveness is because you're holding on to 531 00:33:35,520 --> 00:33:38,560 unforgiveness for others and you this is what you just to 532 00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,080 bargain. If I choose to receive, that 533 00:33:41,080 --> 00:33:43,320 means I'm going to have to give it. 534 00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:47,680 No, I want to hold on to what I have, so I'm not going to 535 00:33:47,680 --> 00:33:52,480 receive forgiveness from myself. Releasing them can release you 536 00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:03,680 next one. Releasing them can release them. 537 00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:09,719 You're forgiving them releases you from the bondage and the 538 00:34:09,719 --> 00:34:13,639 pain and from the venom and the toxin of whatever's happened, 539 00:34:14,239 --> 00:34:16,320 whether you committed it or been on the receiving end. 540 00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:18,600 But releasing them can also release them. 541 00:34:19,679 --> 00:34:21,480 See the part about Jesus on the cross? 542 00:34:21,480 --> 00:34:22,960 Father, forgive them. They don't know what they're 543 00:34:22,960 --> 00:34:24,719 doing. You got to keep reading that 544 00:34:24,719 --> 00:34:31,040 story because down a little further a thief hears that and 545 00:34:31,040 --> 00:34:35,320 one thief says, Remember Me when you come into your Kingdom. 546 00:34:36,639 --> 00:34:41,239 Jesus releasing them. Help this other thief find 547 00:34:41,239 --> 00:34:44,320 release and forgiveness in God for his own stuff. 548 00:34:45,840 --> 00:34:49,639 Releasing them can release them to forgive themselves. 549 00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:56,520 My wife, her grandfather, early Chinese man, grew up in a 550 00:34:56,520 --> 00:35:00,000 traditional Chinese family and didn't say I love you too much. 551 00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:06,120 It was at a Christmas Bible study and it just opened up in 552 00:35:06,120 --> 00:35:08,360 her. She start crying and those kind 553 00:35:08,360 --> 00:35:10,600 of things she says, you know, I'll go into my grandfather's 554 00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:12,600 store in Vancouver. She was black. 555 00:35:12,600 --> 00:35:14,960 He's Chinese. And she'd say grandpa and he'd 556 00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:18,120 look away because you know, she she wasn't full of Chinese. 557 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:20,840 He said you never said I love you. 558 00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:25,680 And after this Bible study, she decided I was going to say I 559 00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:27,960 love you to my grandfather. She forgave. 560 00:35:27,960 --> 00:35:28,840 She released. She did. 561 00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:31,560 She replied the tools in the presence of God she gave, she 562 00:35:31,560 --> 00:35:33,160 released and we got home that night. 563 00:35:33,160 --> 00:35:36,080 It was late, what was early here, and she called and she 564 00:35:36,080 --> 00:35:39,440 says Grandpa, grandpa, so want to tell you Merry Christmas. 565 00:35:40,240 --> 00:35:41,560 And I said want to tell you I love you. 566 00:35:42,360 --> 00:35:46,280 And I heard it on the phone. He said I love you too. 567 00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:53,320 Her releasing him helped him to release himself. 568 00:35:55,600 --> 00:36:02,640 It's bigger than you. Your forgiveness can help other 569 00:36:02,640 --> 00:36:05,240 people forgive themselves. Your forgiveness can help other 570 00:36:05,240 --> 00:36:17,640 people be released next one. Your forgiving your family can 571 00:36:17,640 --> 00:36:20,320 help you reclaim the inheritance for you and your bloodline. 572 00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:27,640 The truth be told what the enemy's plan is, is to use pain 573 00:36:27,720 --> 00:36:30,200 for you to forget what God has given you. 574 00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:34,320 I never want to be what you've hurt me so bad. 575 00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:38,640 So you leave behind the gifts and the calling gods put on your 576 00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:42,720 family and for your bloodline. You leave behind the things that 577 00:36:42,720 --> 00:36:46,840 God has deposited for you for your future as you move forward. 578 00:36:46,960 --> 00:36:51,480 You leave behind the talents and abilities that God has given for 579 00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:55,160 it to pass through you to your to your children, to your 580 00:36:55,160 --> 00:36:59,080 future. You get so so you get so 581 00:36:59,080 --> 00:37:04,960 offended. I don't want none of it at all. 582 00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:11,680 Then you find yourself wondering, like an orphan, who 583 00:37:11,720 --> 00:37:15,080 am I? Because you let a fence rob you 584 00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:18,720 of part of your identity. That was the blessing in that 585 00:37:18,720 --> 00:37:22,760 family. I told you when I was able to 586 00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:26,200 forgive and look back, I saw my dad gave me some things. 587 00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:30,400 He gave me grit not to quit. He gave me entrepreneurship to 588 00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:33,960 go anywhere in the world and do whatever God needs me to do and 589 00:37:33,960 --> 00:37:36,240 not feel like if someone doesn't give me a job, there's no way 590 00:37:36,240 --> 00:37:38,440 it's going to work. Nothing wrong with working the 591 00:37:38,440 --> 00:37:41,920 job, I'm please understand, but the idea is I'm not depending on 592 00:37:41,920 --> 00:37:47,600 that to say my yes to God. He gave me humility in his last 593 00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:52,960 days by asking, son, forgive me before he passed. 594 00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:57,120 It's never too late to ask and seek for the forgiveness that 595 00:37:57,120 --> 00:38:00,000 you need to seek. He gave me a lot that I could 596 00:38:00,000 --> 00:38:04,800 have left if I'll just let the pain of experience dictate and 597 00:38:04,800 --> 00:38:08,920 lead. So part of this is reclaiming 598 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:10,480 the inheritance of your bloodline. 599 00:38:11,240 --> 00:38:13,920 We talk about that in baptism. When you go down in that water, 600 00:38:16,240 --> 00:38:20,200 you coming up to this new life, there's a there's a bloodline 601 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:23,880 inheritance you're reclaiming. The Scripture we talk about is 602 00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:26,480 when Moses, when Moses went through the water and they 603 00:38:26,480 --> 00:38:28,760 brought the riches of Egypt with them and then the waters closed 604 00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:31,760 over and 400 years of family bondage was drowned in the 605 00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:34,880 water. Their bloodline was reclaimed 606 00:38:34,880 --> 00:38:37,960 through those waters. That's what we're talking about. 607 00:38:38,600 --> 00:38:43,720 And forgiving family love has grown folk business and it is 608 00:38:43,720 --> 00:38:46,240 the hardest thing you will ever have to do in your life. 609 00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:50,160 That's why you need a big God and a grown God to do it. 610 00:38:51,080 --> 00:39:02,000 You can't do it on your own. It's really important you really 611 00:39:02,000 --> 00:39:09,760 understand that. So there's no time like now, 612 00:39:13,320 --> 00:39:18,320 there's no time like now, there's no time like now. 613 00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:20,440 Or what if my family's passed on? 614 00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:26,160 You can still forgive. What if the people I've hurt who 615 00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:31,680 have passed on you can still ask for forgiveness because it 616 00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:36,640 begins first and foremost with God, even more so than them. 617 00:39:38,560 --> 00:39:41,160 So we're going to take some moments right now and put this 618 00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:45,040 to work. I'm going to encourage you. 619 00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:48,880 You can sit where where you are and just spend some time 620 00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:53,920 thinking about the family hurts that you've experienced, the 621 00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:59,200 family hurts that you've caused. My dad told me this. 622 00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:01,800 He said, son, when you point at someone point at my wife, I 623 00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:03,880 don't want anybody to think I'm being rude or anything. 624 00:40:05,720 --> 00:40:10,120 When you .1 finger at them, son, you got 3 pointing back at you. 625 00:40:13,360 --> 00:40:17,200 What hurt did I 'cause how did I contribute to the pain? 626 00:40:18,320 --> 00:40:21,640 How did I let the pain go on and not forgive when God was calling 627 00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:24,240 me to forgive? How did I contribute to the 628 00:40:24,240 --> 00:40:25,600 pain? By not getting to know their 629 00:40:25,600 --> 00:40:29,040 story and who they were so I can release that thing. 630 00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:33,720 So I'm going to take some moments right now. 631 00:40:33,720 --> 00:40:36,360 The Holy Spirit is here. Our Father is hosting us in this 632 00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:38,640 room, and He set you up for this time. 633 00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:43,800 The day is your day. You can let it go. 634 00:40:45,080 --> 00:40:48,600 You always could. But God has set up a special 635 00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:52,120 place in time to give you the extra help you may have needed 636 00:40:52,120 --> 00:40:56,440 collectively in this room. See, because we do it together 637 00:40:56,440 --> 00:41:00,520 in this room, you got the testimony of my faith and what 638 00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:04,160 forgiveness of my family's done for me backing you and your hard 639 00:41:04,160 --> 00:41:07,920 decision you got to make. You got my testimony telling you 640 00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,680 forgive and let it go. It's going to be all right. 641 00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:14,280 You're not being irresponsible. You still can set boundaries so 642 00:41:14,360 --> 00:41:15,920 people don't take advantage of you. 643 00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:24,000 They were wrong to have hurt you, whether they've said it or 644 00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:28,040 not. But look what comes out on the 645 00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:33,120 other side. You got the faith in this room 646 00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:35,520 to lift your hands and to stand with you. 647 00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:38,240 There's no place like now. There's no place like here. 648 00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,520 So I'm gonna ask you this. Think about this and let the 649 00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:44,120 Holy Spirit bring to your remembrance. 650 00:41:44,120 --> 00:41:47,640 Now what is it you need to forgive your family for? 651 00:41:49,720 --> 00:41:52,320 What is it you need forgiveness from your family for? 652 00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:57,920 What hurt have you caused that you need to What hurt in your 653 00:41:57,920 --> 00:42:02,200 own family have you caused, whether that's your bloodline 654 00:42:02,200 --> 00:42:07,280 family or whether that's your church family or it heard have 655 00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:16,320 you caused? I just want to just share this 656 00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:19,160 in this time. You know what hurt it would 657 00:42:19,160 --> 00:42:26,840 cause me if one day my son left the house and just didn't come 658 00:42:26,840 --> 00:42:31,240 back and he left because of something that I said that hurt 659 00:42:31,240 --> 00:42:34,560 him, that maybe I wasn't even aware of it or have the depth to 660 00:42:34,560 --> 00:42:38,920 which it hurt him and he just left and never said anything. 661 00:42:43,720 --> 00:42:45,680 As a Father, Can you imagine how much that would hurt me? 662 00:42:46,600 --> 00:42:47,880 Can you? If you can't raise your hand? 663 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:52,400 You know, it's the same way when people come to church and they 664 00:42:52,400 --> 00:42:58,120 just leave and never say anything. 665 00:43:04,820 --> 00:43:06,620 What hurt have you caused? And you're leaving? 666 00:43:12,610 --> 00:43:14,170 So just take time. I'm gonna ask you to close your 667 00:43:14,170 --> 00:43:14,850 eyes. Why? 668 00:43:14,850 --> 00:43:17,050 Because it helps you to focus on what God's doing in your heart. 669 00:43:17,050 --> 00:43:21,250 It's going to take a couple minutes as the Holy Spirit 670 00:43:21,250 --> 00:43:24,720 eliminates, illuminates to you any forgiveness of your family 671 00:43:25,840 --> 00:43:29,600 that you need to forgive. Thank you Holy Spirit for 672 00:43:29,600 --> 00:43:31,720 bringing up people's hearts, souls, and minds. 673 00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:34,200 What needs to be forgiven even right now? 674 00:43:38,600 --> 00:43:43,240 Prayer team, if you can just be praying unless you need to be 675 00:43:43,240 --> 00:43:45,920 forgiven. If you need to do the forgiving 676 00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:47,760 part, do the forgiving part and pray later. 677 00:43:55,400 --> 00:43:59,560 Let it come up, let the images come up or let the issue come up 678 00:44:01,960 --> 00:44:04,440 because I believe the day God is saying we're going to deal with 679 00:44:04,440 --> 00:44:06,840 this and you won't have to see it anymore. 680 00:44:08,840 --> 00:44:11,160 God has the ability and power to do that. 681 00:44:30,200 --> 00:44:32,440 Holy Spirit of God, we thank you for right now that you're 682 00:44:32,440 --> 00:44:34,920 revealing the hearts. You're going deep into the 683 00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:37,680 hearts of everyone here and under the sound of my voice, 684 00:44:38,120 --> 00:44:40,680 deep into the hearts to unpack the pain, unpack the 685 00:44:40,680 --> 00:44:46,840 forgiveness, unpack the bondage, unpack the the hurt people have 686 00:44:46,840 --> 00:44:49,520 for what they disappointment in themselves they have for what 687 00:44:49,520 --> 00:44:52,880 they did and didn't do. We thank you, Holy Spirit, that 688 00:44:52,880 --> 00:44:57,480 you're reaching deep right now in the places that maybe never 689 00:44:57,480 --> 00:44:59,840 even been touched before. We Father, we pray that there's 690 00:44:59,840 --> 00:45:02,600 an anointing in this room and floods every heart that they are 691 00:45:02,600 --> 00:45:06,080 allowing you to go into places they've kept off limits before. 692 00:45:08,120 --> 00:45:12,280 Pockets of pain, hidden dark rooms of hurt that they've never 693 00:45:12,280 --> 00:45:16,760 discussed with anybody. Sometimes you can be hurt by 694 00:45:16,760 --> 00:45:19,760 someone who did nothing wrong because your expectation was 695 00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:22,320 misplaced. That still qualifies. 696 00:45:25,200 --> 00:45:28,480 Thank you, Holy Spirit, for going places that no man can go. 697 00:45:28,560 --> 00:45:31,320 Thank you, Father, for your love entertaining the hearts and 698 00:45:31,320 --> 00:45:34,200 souls of everyone here in ways that we can't reach within 699 00:45:34,200 --> 00:45:38,680 ourselves. Thank you for bringing 700 00:45:38,840 --> 00:45:41,560 restoration and healing and wholeness in those places. 701 00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:45,120 God, Thank you God. The right now forgiveness is 702 00:45:45,120 --> 00:45:49,600 being given, pains being released, and identity connected 703 00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:52,520 with that pain is being disconnected and eradicated. 704 00:45:54,720 --> 00:46:00,240 Father, we thank you that the blood of Jesus washing it all 705 00:46:00,240 --> 00:46:06,280 the way, even right now and even as people are forgiving and 706 00:46:06,280 --> 00:46:10,320 releasing the people they're forgiving and also being 707 00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:18,480 released to forgive. Father, we thank you that 708 00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:21,400 forgiveness, divine Kingdom forgiveness, is flooding this 709 00:46:21,400 --> 00:46:24,280 room and flooding the hearts and souls of the people. 710 00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:37,440 For those, Father, who don't know how, we thank you for your 711 00:46:37,440 --> 00:46:39,360 grace to help them in this moment. 712 00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:44,160 Yield. Thank you for Your grace to help 713 00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:45,920 them in this moment. Yield the Lord. 714 00:46:54,000 --> 00:46:55,840 You're not too far gone to forgive. 715 00:46:56,280 --> 00:47:00,080 It's not too late. Don't be deceived by said by 716 00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,920 thinking to yourself, well, that you know, that's been a long 717 00:47:02,920 --> 00:47:06,560 time doesn't need going back. Remember, it's bigger than you. 718 00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:11,040 There's things God wants to release through you, maybe to 719 00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:14,040 the next generation that are blocked up by the stuff you 720 00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,000 don't want to address and don't want to deal with. 721 00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:21,680 And don't make excuses. Well, that's what everybody did 722 00:47:21,680 --> 00:47:26,080 back then. Don't make excuses and don't 723 00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:39,420 make excuses for yourself. Father, we're going to pray now. 724 00:47:39,420 --> 00:47:41,780 I'm going to activate a prayer. God's already doing the work. 725 00:47:42,100 --> 00:47:44,900 But I want to extend our faith with you and to let you know 726 00:47:44,900 --> 00:47:48,860 this entire house and this entire heaven that God has is on 727 00:47:48,860 --> 00:47:51,660 your side tonight and on your side right now. 728 00:47:52,580 --> 00:47:58,260 Father, we thank you right now, God, that you are releasing pain 729 00:47:59,100 --> 00:48:01,160 and hurt. We thank you, Father, that 730 00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:05,880 family hurt from ejection, from abandonment, from sexual abuse, 731 00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:09,400 from verbal abuse, from emotional abuse, from relational 732 00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:13,280 abuse is being broken even right now, Lord, and being cast out 733 00:48:13,280 --> 00:48:15,440 and removed. We thank you that wholeness is 734 00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:17,600 coming in behind that abuse and bringing wholeness. 735 00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:21,120 God, We thank you, Father, that people that have the grace to be 736 00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:25,280 able to say, God, I see now they don't know what they were doing. 737 00:48:26,040 --> 00:48:29,200 Father, we thank you that you're going very, very deep into the 738 00:48:29,200 --> 00:48:32,720 hearts and lives of all of the all of the people here and 739 00:48:32,720 --> 00:48:36,480 families that seem to be irretrievably broken because of 740 00:48:36,480 --> 00:48:40,360 pain or unforgiveness now can be healed and can be mended. 741 00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:43,360 God to your glory. Father, we thank you God that as 742 00:48:43,360 --> 00:48:47,400 forgiveness is flowing in these areas of life, God people not 743 00:48:47,400 --> 00:48:50,440 only forgiving themselves, what they didn't do for how they 744 00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:53,240 didn't take advantage of opportunity, of how they didn't 745 00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:56,720 serve God sooner, how they didn't yield to God earlier. 746 00:48:56,800 --> 00:48:59,200 We thank you God, as people are forgiving themselves tells us 747 00:48:59,200 --> 00:49:03,680 well God, that riches and inheritance and goodness and 748 00:49:03,680 --> 00:49:09,360 glory has been pent up, now is being released down the 749 00:49:09,360 --> 00:49:12,840 bloodline. We thank you, Lord, that people 750 00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:19,360 are experiencing your love, your love, your love, your love. 751 00:49:19,880 --> 00:49:24,760 They're experiencing your love, your great loving kindness. 752 00:49:26,040 --> 00:49:28,480 You're loving in ways that only you can do, Lord, and we thank 753 00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:34,120 you for that. And Father, we thank you for 754 00:49:34,120 --> 00:49:39,120 testimonies not to prove to us, but give them a testimony of 755 00:49:39,120 --> 00:49:42,640 what you've done. Give them a testimony to tell 756 00:49:42,720 --> 00:49:46,480 their family members and their friends and their kids about. 757 00:49:47,400 --> 00:49:50,080 I couldn't forgive, but God entered my heart and I was able 758 00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:52,680 to. I had a heart time, but I chose 759 00:49:52,680 --> 00:49:56,040 to love God more and now I'm transformed and my family is 760 00:49:56,040 --> 00:49:59,800 just, I don't know, turned around God give them testimonies 761 00:49:59,800 --> 00:50:03,360 to tell to their own families and to their own souls and to 762 00:50:03,360 --> 00:50:06,000 their Diaries. God where they kept Diaries of 763 00:50:06,000 --> 00:50:10,080 pain, give them testimonies of transformation to book in those 764 00:50:10,120 --> 00:50:14,640 God and then change the chapter. We thank you for that Father. 765 00:50:15,560 --> 00:50:19,880 As our worship team continues, continue to let God do the work. 766 00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:33,120 Thank you so much for tuning into this week's sermon. 767 00:50:33,120 --> 00:50:36,440 We pray you were challenged, equipped and encouraged. 768 00:50:36,680 --> 00:50:38,640 Make sure to follow us on all platforms. 769 00:50:38,640 --> 00:50:42,720 That's love Quest Intl church. We out here for real. 770 00:50:42,800 --> 00:50:45,080 We're really doing it. That's Facebook, Instagram, 771 00:50:45,080 --> 00:50:46,680 YouTube and TikTok.