If you've been following me for quite a while, you know that I
am unapologetically unafraid of pivoting in life, no matter what
the pivot entails. Over the years, I've really
learned to embrace that life is just not linear.
There will always be a time where I have to createspace for
something new by letting go of what no longer serves me.
But if I can be fully transparent right now, I have
not always been this way. I once used to fight with
everything in me when feelings would arise, telling me that it
was time to make a move, time to transition to something new, and
maybe leave something behind. I didn't know what it all meant
for me, which was the problem. Did a change in direction mean
sacrificing parts of myself? Did the call to answer the pivot
mean I failed at what currently existed?
Would moving on to something new guarantee me success or
happiness? There was just no way to tell,
but there were always these looming questions associated
with any pivot in my life, personally or professionally.
The truth is, I would never know the answer to those questions or
exactly what have weighted me if I didn't trust my gut to
discover what was on the other side of those feelings.
Pivoting in life and career can be scary.
It can be one of the most daunting feelings.
When you reach a point of needing to make a change, it can
be difficult to know if you're on the right path, let alone,
you know, even making the right decision.
I want to take some time to explore how to better understand
and trust your instincts when it comes to making changes in your
personal and professional life. I think it'll also be good for
me to unpack the importance of taking the time to evaluate all
the options you are presented with when pivoting in life, as
well as how to make decisions that align with your core
values, your goals, and your beliefs.
Yes, those are those magic words.
Again, let's get into it. Welcome to Living Divinely, the
Divine Oasis Podcast. I'm your host, Amber Janine,
founder and Editor in Chief of Divine Oasis Biweekly.
I use this platform to dissect what it means to live a well
lived life by exploring ways that we can createspace for
ourselves through intentionality, truth, love and
authenticity. I will start by saying pivoting
for me has always been a very instinctual feeling.
It's always been one of those like if you know, you know type
feelings. While I've never doubted the
feelings as they've come, I have a lot of times doubted my
ability to rely on my own instincts and my power of
execution before I really dive in here.
There are a few important things that I want you to keep in mind
when thinking about change. First, always ensure that you
are hyperaware when instinctual indicators of a pivot and how
they show up in your life. I'll come back to this as I
navigate through the episode. Think about that.
Another thing to note is it won't always be beautiful or
this big aha moment. A pivot can and may get messy,
but that is okay. Also ask yourself how do you
pivot successfully without losing yourself?
Or is it important to lose parts of yourself during the process
of a pivot? Lastly, understanding that there
is so much power that lies within a change in direction and
it is critical to the journey. I think the problem for a lot of
people who may be listening or who will listen is you know
exactly what you need to do, but you choose not to do it.
There are so many reasons rooted in why you choose not to take
the leap. But are any of those reasons
good enough to choose not to make, not to make moves that you
know deep down inside that you absolutely need to make?
Truth is, you don't need me. You don't need another book,
another article, another course, another podcast.
You don't need anything to confirm what it is that you
already know. The confirmations and the
affirmations. They've been there and they've
been there for a while. It's just that now the ball is
officially in your court and you have to make a move.
When it came to change, the lack of forward movement for me
personally had a lot to do with being comfortable where I was in
the present moment in life. It's just natural for us to
become accustomed to the routine and and the stability that our
current situations provide. In a lot of ways, this makes the
idea of switching paths like this fearful, anxiety written
prospects. We worry about the unknown, all
you know, potential failures, the possibility of negative
impacts, any negative impacts that it could have on your
personal and professional lives. Like we worry about so much.
However, even within that worry, it is incredibly important to
remember that pivoting can also bring growth.
It can bring opportunities and change, so many new beginnings.
But it takes courage. It takes so much courage to make
a change, but trusting in yourself and your instincts can
lead to so many beautiful outcomes and substantial reward.
I do want to be clear, though, that pivots and changes don't
just mean you leave a bad situation or you elevate in your
career and boom, all is well again.
Like, no, that's not the reality.
Changes and shifts in life are often followed by or happens
simultaneously while you're purging old versions of
yourself. Change of direction can mean
having to release all parts of you that are no longer in
alignment with the person that you're becoming.
And this is OK too. But I will say it can be
particularly particularly difficult when it comes to
career changes for a lot of people.
Maybe you're just one of those people who spent years time in
the ladder in a certain industry and then you realize like, it's
no longer fulfilling for you. It can be very, very tempting in
those moments to want to hold on to the security and the familiar
aspects of your current identity or your past identity.
But sometimes like letting go is necessary for growth to take
place, I hear similar things a lot when I am watching design
shows. Y'all know I love my design
shows, and one of my favorite shows for quite a while has been
the show called Point of View, a designer profile.
You can watch this show on HBO Max or Discovery Plus through
Magnolia Network, the network which was founded by Chip and
Joanna Gaines. And y'all know I love me some
Joanna Gaines. But most of the designers on
this show are actively working in the interior design fields,
and most of them decided to answer this, calling on their
life during a time that they were doing something completely
unrelated to the design industry.
Can you imagine how scary that is?
To go from the stability of a career, like being a doctor or a
lawyer and deciding randomly after years of schooling and
maybe starting your own practice that you're going to walk away
from it all and do something that is more fulfilling?
It can sound crazy, but from personal experience, a lot of my
pivots in life consisted of me walking away from things that I
had said yes to because they were things that people wanted
for me. I spent a lot of my life
answering the callings other people had over my life and not
responding to life intentionally.
The point is here through all of that, is to allow yourself the
space and the time to mourn the loss of your own identity.
It is hard for sure, but while you're mourning, you have to not
let it hold you back from embracing or going after new
opportunities. Always keep in mind too that
your identity should not be and absolutely is not attached to
what you do or singular industry, but rather to your
unique abilities, your unique set of skills, values and the
experience that make you who you are.
Pivoting in life and career requires A willingness, this
willingness, to take risk and step into the unknown.
An unknown that while feel fearful, can lead to immense
growth and fulfillment. By trusting your instincts and
being open to change, you can navigate these transitions with
so much confidence, intentionality, and clarity.
So how do you know when it's time to pivot?
I am one of those people who believe that we are all born
with an innate ability to foresee things, or the ability
to send certain outcomes before they occur.
While we have this ability, many of us have not yet tapped into
this power, but it's there. Our intuition is such a powerful
tool that we often ignore when it comes to strategic decision
making. We often let practicality
override what we feel when. We should absolutely always be
betting on our intuition when it comes to recognizing the signs
that tells us it's time for a pivot.
If you have a nagging feeling that something isn't right, or
you no longer feel feel fulfilled in a situation or like
your needs aren't being met, you should Absolutely not turn a
blind eye to these feelings because they're nagging at you
for a reason. Our intuition is usually so spot
on, and it's always trying to guide us toward what we truly
need. One of the other ways to know,
aside from your intuition when it's time to pivot, is when you
stop feeling empowered in certain situations or
environments. If you feel like you're no
longer growing or learning in your current position, if you
dread going to work every day, if you're just unhappy in
certain moments, in certain environments, it it it may be
time to move on. When we stop feeling inspired or
motivated by our work or our environments, it's a clear
indication that we need to pivot or do something different,
something that's a little bit more fulfilling.
My favorite telltale sign that it is time for a pivot is if you
find that you're constantly complaining like that, just not
being able to stand something so much that you're always talking
about it, but you're talking about it in a negative way.
If your current situation is causing you way more stress than
it is joy, it's not sustainable for you long term.
Trust your intuition and start exploring new opportunities.
Remember that choosing to pivot or choosing a change and
direction is not failure. It's actually an opportunity for
growth. It's an opportunity for self
discovery to learn something new about yourself.
By listening to your intuition and recognizing the signs like
you can make all the necessary changes that you need to to
curate and create a more fulfilling, well lived life.
I know it's all easier said or easier to hear than it is to do.
I know that I've been there, but it is you learning to trust
yourself and your intuition that gets you to where you want to be
in life. Another for sure way for me that
I could always tell that it was time for a shift in life was I
would start asking questions. The thing is, it was never me
asking questions to myself. I was always going to others and
asking questions. I would always be like, what do
you think about this? Should I do this?
Should I do that? It was almost like I was in need
of validation or approval from others to do what I already knew
I needed to do or what needed to be done.
Trusting your instincts can absolutely be challenging, yet
it is also an essential part of navigating a pivot.
My favorite thing to always tell myself, my clients, and my
mentees is channel your heart space.
What does your heart want? Never mind what seems practical
in these moments, or what seems like a more realistic approach
to change what is going to fulfill your heart long term.
I've addressed societal pressures and conformity in
previous episodes, but to touch on it again for a moment.
Being realistic, it is very, very easy to attach yourself to
societal standards and what is deemed as acceptable, or to
attach yourself to other people's expectations of you.
But true fulfillment comes from listening to you, your own
desires, your own wants, your own needs, and going after the
feelings that live within you. You just have to trust that your
heart knows what's best and have the courage to follow its
guidance, even if it means veering off the path, the path
that for years society has told you is the only option for you
to take. Just go.
You always have to learn to trust your intuition.
But entrusting your intuition, it also comes with trusting
yourself. I feel like selftrust and being
confident in yourself is always like top tier.
It's at the top of the list and whatever it is, the truth you're
doing every whatever it is the truth thinking about doing.
When I do personal and professional mentor work, we
work from the inside out. Meaning I don't advise on how to
advance in your career or your personal life without guiding
those that I'm working with on the best practices to take care
of themselves internally. How you feel within is a direct
reflection of your external reality and your self trust, and
your confidence is very much rooted in all of those things.
A lot of your success will be rooted in your ability to
practice selftrust. It will be rooted in your
confidence, how you show up into a space, how you show up into a
room. Your confidence is very much all
about how you feel powerful enough to go after your goals
and chase things that you never deemed possible.
Believe in yourself and your power to navigate and execute a
pivot like Trust that you have the resilience and the
adaptability to handle whatever challenges may come your way.
Have confidence in your decision making abilities too, and
believe that you're making the right decisions for yourself.
Have so much confident in those decision makings that you don't
have to, you know, seek out other people or need to be
validated by other people. Overall, like trusting in your
instincts will it takes a lot of work.
It takes a lot of practice, but the more you listen to your
inner voice and act on what you're hearing, the stronger
you're trusting yourself will become.
The work in the practice that you do to trust yourself more
will also be the results that positively impacts and trickles
down into other areas or other aspects of your life.
And it'll benefit you so much. But I mean, let's let's just be
for real. Like it is so much work to trust
your inner voice. Like, I don't think we all know
like the work that it takes. Like do you really know?
It takes so much to trust your inner knowing and actually
follow through with what your gut is telling you.
It takes a hell of a lot of commitment, confidence, and self
trust to follow through with the things that you're feeling and
and not even seek validation about it.
It also requires a strong willingness to listen to your
inner voice, even when logic and fear try to convince you that
what you're feeling, what you're experiencing, is crazy or
something you shouldn't even think about pursuing.
Or it's out of your league. Think about all the time your
inner voice told you to get up and outline that business plan,
or to make a move, or even to stop calling and texting that
person. You're not supposed to be
calling and texting, but you went against that knowing, and
it didn't serve you well in the long run, Did it?
To trust your instincts. Start by really tuning into your
heart space. Sit in stillness.
Pay attention to what comes up for you.
Take time to reflect on what truly excites you.
What ignites your soul on fire? What energizes you.
Remember that your instincts are often rooted in your deepest
desires and passions. So when making decisions, trust
that your instincts will always guide you to work at a path that
aligns with your authentic self. One of my favorite platforms
right now is the Honey Hotline. Shout out to my girl Amber.
But Amber goes by the name of Amber, the conduit on all of her
social channels, and Amber started this platform called the
Honey Hotline, where she gives subscribers hundreds of dollars
worth of content that consists of tarot forecasting, psychic
readings, and cosmic downloads like it's a wealth of
information. It's literally only $17.00 a
month. I It's amazing and I love this
platform because it is such a healthy combination of
self-care, astrology, healing, love, beauty and money.
But I felt like one of the messages that she poured into
the Honey hotline within the last week is in full alignment
with what I'm speaking about today.
Because Amber spoke about a few things.
Trusting your gut. Trusting when you're feeling
that's when something isn't right.
But also following your instincts if at any point you
feel a nudge to start working toward launching a new project
or a new business plan. And one of the things that keeps
sitting with me is like the work that you do within the next
three months is really setting the foundation for the future
and the things that you desire right now.
And if you've had a plan, if you felt that nudge, it's time to
start right now. I just felt like her message was
so spot on. It was like perfect timing.
Amber is just she's a wealth of just beauty, love and knowledge.
And she is always dropping gems so shamelessly plugging her
platform, the Honey Hotline. You can join the Honey Hotline
by texting 877-636-2461. Again, that's 877-636-2461.
And text that number to become a honey and join the Honey
Hotline. You will not regret it, but I
said all of that to say you will receive signs and downloads and
confirmations in all forms. It'll come and hit you in ways,
in many different ways and and and and different forms of
communication. They're coming.
They're there. You've seen it, you've heard it,
You're experiencing it. This is probably another form of
a confirmation right now as you're listening, but a lot of
the times you're not able to decipher what is truly for you
until you really learn to trust your inner knowing.
And you learn to trust like, oh OK, that's it, now I hear it, I
see it. It's time to make a move.
Here's something that I want to be, that I want you to be very
clear about. When moving into new phases of
your life. Listen up.
If it didn't serve you, then if it caused you any type of stress
or wore you down before, it will likely be a repetitive cycle the
2nd, the 3rd or the 15th time around.
So be open to cutting the dead weight.
Listen. One of the most important
aspects, but also one of the hardest.
And I can say this has been very hard for me and a lot of people
that I know is trusting our instincts when it's time to
pivot and applying your learnings from the past to the
present. Like sometimes we we, I don't
know what it is, but we just love to give people, places and
situations the benefit of the doubt.
We want them to prove us wrong, and yet they still always prove
us right. They always make us or remind us
why we made the decisions that we made in the first place.
But it's okay because we all make mistakes.
Mistakes are a natural part of our human experience in this
realm. However, when you have new
opportunities presented to you and you choose to involve
yourself in the same destructive patterns, habits or situations
repeatedly, that is self neglect.
Your past experiences are and should be a gateway to guide you
on how to navigate through the present.
And they will be if you allow them to.
But you have to allow it. Take the time to reflect on your
previous choices and decisions. Always think about what works
well. What are the things that didn't
go as planned. By analyzing the past, you can
gain insight into new patterns or behaviors or old patterns or
behaviors that may have led to unsatisfactory outcomes.
And you can choose a different outcome the second time around.
The the the self reflection throughout this process is also
something that allows you to identify what needs to change
within you in order for the pivot to take place or for the
pivot to be successful. But let's be honest though.
Like learning from your past mistakes also involves you
learning to accept and take full accountability for your actions.
A lot of the times, it's not always others.
It's you taking up accountability for the things
that you've done or have may have not done, or taking
accountability for the things that you've subjected yourself
to. You have to recognize where your
actions may have been the result of things not working out the
way that you hoped. You have to be honest and take
responsibility for any missteps when you do this.
This creates A mindset shift, and it's a mindset shift that
empowers you to take full control over your life and make
proactive decisions moving forward.
What you did or did not do in the past is nothing to be
ashamed of. Everything that you experience
and go through serves its purpose, and it could be a guide
for growth and transformation in the future.
You just have to embrace the lessons and learn from your
mistakes and use them to fuel your journey towards a
successful a successful pivot. Let's talk a little bit about
guidance and support. When you're considering a big
life transition, I fully encourage you to connect with
others who have experienced similar pivots.
Learn from their experiences. Learn what they've done or the
things that they didn't do. A lot of the times when
listening to other people's insights and their advice can
really help you gain a fresh perspective and avoid potential
pitfalls. One thing I do want you to be
clear about though is always hold your vision and your plans
close to you. Hold them close for as long as
you can. There are so many ways to seek
guidance and advice from others without oversharing your ideas.
You don't want to put yourself in a space where you get so
distracted with talking about your plans that you forget to
execute them. It's also to be mindful of who
you talk to. I have found that the best
people to get advice from or to bounce ideas off of are the
people that I've actually seen execute and do the work the very
or done the very thing that I'm looking to accomplish, or doing
something or have done something similar to what I'm looking to
do. When it comes to pivoting and
making a big personal or professional change, advice and
guidance can be such a valuable tool in helping you navigate
your decisions. But just as important as all
those valuable tools and life guidance and lessons.
It's choosing the right person or people to rely on for advice.
Look for people or someone who is trustworthy, someone who is
honest, and someone who has your best interests at heart.
Too many times we hear stories about how others have trusted
the wrong people with their vision or sharing ideas,
thinking they're going to get advice, thinking that these
people want the best for them and want to help them.
But the people, the very people that they trust in and expect to
receive from, take their ideas and run.
So be smart about who you can fight in.
The person that you look to can be a mentor, a coach or friend.
Just keep in mind that there are ways to be open and honest about
your situation, what you're considering, without fully
revealing everything. Listen to their advice and
perspective, but don't put all of your trust and what others
say. Ultimately, the best decision
that you can make is the decision that feels most in
alignment with you, even coming from me, even any advice for me.
I may be able to give you advice that gets you started, but the
execution on your journey is entirely up to you.
Don't neglect the fact that your path is unique.
So what works for someone else? What works for me may not be
exactly what works for you, and this is OK, but it doesn't mean
that you can't take the vice the advice and that the advice won't
be of some benefit throughout your journey.
Also, be mindful of the feedback you received to take the
constructive criticism with stride and use it as a tool for
growth. You know, don't let the negative
comments or any unsolicited advice make you question where
you're headed or don't allow it to steer you off course.
When seeking advice and guidance, remember that your
decision rests with you and only you.
You can use the input and tools from other people to your
advantage, but don't let them. Their feedback be the
determining factor for how you move forward, or don't let it
determine the fact that you don't move forward.
Trust your instincts and make the decision that feels right
for you and your situation. At the end of the day, whatever
the decision is, whether it's a decision to end a friendship or
relationship, change careers, launch a new business, or revive
an old one, there is so much unknown throughout the process.
Once you come into agreement with yourself that it's time to
pivot, it's natural for you to feel a bit lost and ensure of
what comes next. I want to empower you to trust
and embrace the unknown because it can be such a powerful
experience and serve you well in the long run.
When you embrace what you're insured of letting go and
trusting, the process creates space for you to explore new
opportunities and experiences and you may never have
considered before. Rather than seeing the unknown
as a source of anxiety, try reframing that mindset and see
it as a chance to grow, See it as a chance to learn.
Stay open to new ideas and new possibilities, and just be
willing to take calculated risk. I believe I previously shared
the story about how Divine Oasis was born, so I won't go into
full detail here, but I will say that this brand was born during
a forced pivot. It was during a time when I had
no choice but to pivot, and throughout the entire process I
felt like I had failed. I had no idea what the outcome
was on the other side. I was afraid, but I pushed
forward even throughout all the work, me not even ever being
able to foresee what was on the other side.
I just kept going, even through the fear.
And so at some point you have to trust that the unknown is simply
that it's unknown. And while embracing it can bring
on anxiety and fear, on the other side of that unknown can
be something that is so thrilling and rewarding.
My advice to you is to just relinquish control.
Heavy outcome. I was actually just talking
about this with my hair stylist the other day.
We were expressing how letting go and allowing others to help
you when you've built a business from the ground up and you've
put all your blood, sweat and tears into this thing that you
love. And it could be so difficult to
allow others to come in and help you.
But your need for control often does more harm than good.
One way to embrace the unknown is to just focus on the things
that you can control. Create a plan for your next
steps. What project management tools
can you invest in to help you execute your plan?
Set realistic and achievable goals.
Start working toward your goal, your toward your goals and
action items one by one. Don't try to do everything all
at once. It's just going to confuse you.
By taking small steps toward your new direction, you gain
momentum over time and over time.
This will help you to build your confidence.
It can also support you in feeling more in control of the
process, even when things still feel uncertain.
If you know me personally, you've heard me say this, or
maybe even see me tweet this, but delusion is my jam.
I am the queen of delusion. I'm what most people consider a
free spirit. I am just always in a dreamlike
state, and I believe what most people deem to be impossible is
very much achievable. If I can speak about it, I can
breathe life into it and I can manifest it.
My answer to embracing embracing the unknown has been to approach
it with delusion and curiosity. I dive in head first with
everything. I cannot always expect to land
on my feet, but I do always have a plan.
Should I not land on my feet, which I won't, but it's always
good to just take precaution. But I know I will.
I will always land on my feet. Be curious, Seek out new
information in perspective. Ask questions.
Stay open to new opportunities. I've encouraged my current
mentee to study courses on master class that align with her
career goals, things that she wants to do, things that she
wants to learn. And we've talked about ways that
I can support her and what she the things that she needs from
me to remain in the space of curiosity and constant learning.
I want her, and I want all of you to see your pivot or the
next phase of your journey as an adventure.
Rather than something that's scary and daunting, or this
overbearing challenge, stay patient, remain faithful, and
trust the process. Pivoting takes time, and it's
unlikely that everything will fall into place overnight.
I'm telling you this, but also telling myself this.
While I remind myself these things daily, I also want to
tell you that there will always setbacks and obstacles, but if
you remain committed and stay focused on your goals, you will
ultimately find your way. Embracing the unknown is such a
critical part of successfully pivoting, both personally and
professionally. By staying open minded and
focusing on what you can control and trusting the process, you
can turn your pivot into an exciting and fulfilling new
chapter in your life. I hope that this episode
inspires you to take a more calm and practical approach to growth
and actualizing a better reality for yourself, because you
absolutely deserve it.