Hi and welcome back to another episode of Deplorable Nation.
I'm your host Deplorable Janet, and today I have two of my
favorite female friends that are back with me today.
I'm so excited that we're doing a nether ladies round table and
this one is going to be very helpful and very useful I think,
to a lot of people. So welcome back, Miss Ellie.
How are you today? I'm good.
How are you? Fabulous.
Fabulous and Miss Heidi. How are you?
Darn. Good.
How is everybody? Everybody's good today.
More than fabulous, everybody's sniffy, snuffy and allergy laden
today. Oh yes, that is true.
We are. So if you guys hear boohooing
and tears, I don't know if it's really boohooing and tears
because we're sad or moved or it's because everyone's have
allergy problems. True, 100% of that, definitely.
So today is going to be a very interesting show.
We have several different things that we want to discuss with the
listeners today and probably some things that are going to
hit home for a lot of people on a lot of different levels.
So I want to start off with a little story that happened to me
this morning. Most people don't know unless
you talk to me all the time. However, we had to make a move
recently, very quickly and very unexpectedly.
And so we went from out in the country wilderness and more into
kind of a city setting or whatever with, you know, lack of
wildlife per se and things like that.
So my husband and I were talking about it yesterday and I said,
you know what? I really miss?
I said I miss getting up every day and seeing Eagles and Hawks
in our yard. And this morning we go outside,
he comes out, we're talking about God, talking about the
Bible, and all of the sudden a hawk lands on our fence.
And I just had to take a pause and tell God thank you because I
said I missed that yesterday. And the reason why I brought up
this story is because a lot of people, when they move, they
miss the house, which is a materialistic thing.
I missed God's creation, the Eagles and the Hawks, and he
presented that with to me today so that I could give thanks and
be grateful for the blessing and the miracle that he just
revealed in my life. Because it wasn't focused on
materialism or manmade things, it was on his creation show.
I just wanted to share that story today because it was quite
punching to me this morning. Well, he showed you that your
home is wherever you are, I think absolutely.
And that blessings come in so many different forms.
They don't have to be something big, something simple like that.
And it just touched me so deeply because I was like, thank you,
thank you so much for providing that for me because that was,
that was like a beautiful sign for me to start the day today.
So anyways. I love that.
So we want to get into lots of different topics today, but one
of the things that is definitely going on modern day times,
literally every day from every angle, is a tax on God.
So I will give the floor to you guys and have at it.
That is such a broad topic Jada we talk about.
You guys talk? Wait a minute.
Well, I think. I think also like God.
I feel like people have misconstrued it so badly, like
we were saying is. God is in everything.
God is in that, that hawk. God is in the sky.
God is in the. I live by the mountains.
They're right outside my door. So I love the mountains.
God is in the mountains for me. You know my personal which is
why I have that on my logo and everything because that
represents church to me, like, not church.
And and a lot of people might disagree with that and I think
the disillusionment comes from. Man is you know they say that
that scripture that man is always a liar like he's not.
But I'm just saying like sometimes people put their faith
in a man and and in a situation like I did and and come out
hating everything. Most Mormons that leave the
church are hate everything after they they don't want anything to
do with God. They not everything in general,
but like I'm atheist. And so I didn't do that.
Thank heavens my mom had already got out and she was a Stevens
minister and she was like feeding me little things for a
long time. And so was my husband.
So I felt like, safer that this isn't God that did this to you.
This was people. Yeah.
So and and even the church, like, I know most of my family,
most of his family all are still in.
And they are not bad people. Like I listen to some of these.
Podcasts about Mormons, and I've sent messages to a few of them
when I've heard people on that are like they beat their
children every night. They they beat they, they have
25 wives, all of them. I'm like, no they don't.
No they don't. None of this is true unless
you're in a different sect. If you're specifically talking
about a specific family, like maybe they do, you know, or
maybe your family did. But just because my dad wasn't a
good person doesn't mean the church is a bad person per se.
But I think. The upper echelon, like the
upper, just like our government, you get to a certain level.
And all those people, I think they know stuff.
All of them well, and it's kind of like this discussion has been
had many times before and lots of different shows, but like the
Masons or other occult groups, right?
Secret societies, the general everyday people are not bad
people, but there are bad people amongst them.
And it's the same thing in church communities.
And The thing is that man is so fallible.
We are all like completely full of sin, right?
And so I think a lot of the disillusionment and breakdown
between God and religion or considering God himself or a
building, right, it's because the building is something that
man made and the people are sinners.
And so putting those things together, you know, what's the
what? The saying absolute power
corrupts absolutely. Yes, which is 100% true.
Politics, religion. You know, those in the
workplace, no matter what it is, you give somebody too much power
and they are still living with their ego and their lives.
That's when you have a problem. I think.
I think a lot of times where God tries to tell us about don't.
And This is why I'm so blatant when I come forward with my
story and I don't hold back because so many people do in the
Mormon community, even some of the biggest podcasts, don't talk
about the temple out of respect. But I refuse to leave anything
in secret because I feel like anything done in secret is not
okay because God tells us not to take oath and not to have hidden
things like we should not fit. I'm not talking about personal
sin. I'm talking about big things.
Like, I'm not saying go tell everyone in the world what you
did, like that's between you and and God.
But I'm telling you like when it comes to like rituals or weird
stuff like that or oh, you better get out there and say
because what about the next person?
Like it's not about just me anymore than, right?
It's about you paying it forward and you helping someone else to
heal. Because you were relieved of
something you were unburdened in your life of, you know, sin,
sacrifice, whatever you want to call it.
And so you are supposed to help other people be able to do the
same thing and free themselves. Well, and it's just such an
uncomfortable feeling because they attack you and say, well,
you you let out these secrets that are sacred and you did this
or you did that and it's hard. Because, I mean, I understand.
I understand what they used to mean to me.
I understand what they mean to them, Okay.
But I also understand that what I was doing was not of God
anymore. I mean, I talked to the New York
Patriot and he told me to go watch a Gnostic mask.
That scared me. Like, you know, why are they
tricking people? If you want, if they want, if
the Mormons came out tomorrow and said.
Okay, We're going to lay it all out.
This is what we do. We do nasty mass.
We do this, we do that, or we're Masons or whatever they want to
do and don't tie it into God. I would shut up because then we
wouldn't have problem anymore because they're taking all these
nice people about Christianity and it's not the same thing.
They serve a different Jesus, and I don't know what you know
well. And that's The thing is, bad
things happen with good men do nothing.
And so that's kind of the thing, you know, if you don't, if you
know there's something that needs to be spoken about
exposed, you have to do that. Especially if you follow the
path that that God has set for you, you have to bring those
things to light. Kind of like you definitely have
to give your own testimony. It's very important that you do
that, and for me, my life is an open book.
There is nothing about my life I have not discussed openly on a
podcast before, because any secret hidden part of myself
does not make me whole in front of God, and I can't.
I can't have complete and total edification through God, you
know, doing his works and having that intellectual, moral and
spiritual enlightenment, if there's anything about me that's
hidden, or a cult. Do you think it?
Yeah. Oh, sorry.
Go ahead, Ellie. I Do you think it comes from
being a nurse? Sort of.
Because we have a collective responsibility.
I feel like that's part of it for me, like I feel collectively
responsible for humans, like. On a different level.
And then, But the calling wasn't mine.
I never would have done this, you know?
But like, also, I don't want my fellow people, like if they're
getting ready to go to the temple and maybe they hear my
story, maybe they won't, you know, or maybe they'll pause or
some. I don't know.
Like that. And that's not me.
That's a conduit. You know what I'm saying?
Like, anytime when you do something, if you're doing it
for the right reason because God told you to do something, then
that's not you. He can use a donkey, so.
Yeah, so how about how about you, Ellie?
Like, how how do you feel about like, the need to give your
testimony and help other people? What was your like calling to
start your show? I haven't heard Ellie's story.
I'd love to hear. That I mean, Janet, I was on
your podcast for the first time and I.
I can go back to the first time I was on it and she said she
would never ever do a show. I.
Would never do a podcast and I would never have my own show.
And God was like, Oh yeah, watch this.
And I thought she had a different idea.
And then I don't want to quite get into it because the story's
still being written. But basically I got baptized and
God was like, you're going to stop your podcast.
I have something different I need you to work on.
Not that my podcast was bad, Not that like it was simple or
anything like that. Like you, Janet, I was an open
book. But there's something different
that something much bigger. You had a calling.
Much bigger, and I and I didn't have time to do both right.
So it was a very abrupt thing that I was just very at peace
with and I was just like, yeah, this is the right thing to do.
Did not intend to stop it when I did, but I did.
And but I started my podcast to share all of the different
things and that was a that was a journey.
Like if people started like from the beginning and then listen to
the end. To my points of view on things
have changed quite drastically. A lot.
Well, that happens because we
all evolve as you learn. Like if you were going down the
journey, like my first of my journey was nothing like now.
But the fact that I feel like when some people go on a
journey, whatever the journey is, whether it's through faith
or a career, or they're researching a new topic, right,
you can be influenced by people and go, oh.
This is the definite right answer And then you stop
researching, you stop thinking critically and you just you
become so set in your ways. And I never did that once.
The I'm going to question everything spark happened.
I just question everything like and that's not to say that when
people share their story that I don't believe them.
That's not what I mean. What I mean is, if something
sounds off, then maybe I go. Research a little bit more or
maybe if it challenges something that I believe then I go
research it like and you know earlier Janet, you were talking
about how confessing everything and you anything kept in secret
basically makes you incomplete before God.
And the distinction I want to make there is not and not saying
that you do this or Janet or Heidi.
But people think that they can just Yep, I sinned in this way.
You know, I swore I cheated on my husband.
I, you know, drink alcohol, whatever the sin is, right.
And then they go, OK, I'm forgiven, I told people.
And it's like, no, no, no, no, there's that's not how that
works. Honey, actually be sorry and
repent and then actually try not to do it again.
Cognizing that. What led you there?
Yeah. What led you there?
Try and get to the root of it.
Recognize you're probably still going to sit in the future
because you're not perfect. Be truly sorry when it happens.
You can't just be like, oh, I said I I did this.
God Forgives me. I can keep being a jerk and it's
like no, how that works. And there's there's two things
about that. That is all part of the
sanctification process. After you get saved, after you
accept Jesus, you are a continual and constant work in
progress because we are naturally centers and God is not
going to work on getting everything out of you that is
wrong all at once. That's not possible.
And so watch this fantastic video yesterday about a guy that
is having problems with cussing and he knows it's bad and he
knows it's supposed to stop. And people are like, well,
really upset at him that every once in a while he'll still use
an F bomb. And so people get disheartened.
I'm, I'm, I'm with this guy. I'm working on the same same,
but here's the thing, he said, you know, because these people
are basically like expecting him to lie and not be his true self
because it is something that they don't do in their lives.
And so they're putting judgment on him and saying that you
should lie and say you don't sin.
They're asking you to lie. They're asking you to be a
dishonest. Everything is a work in
progress. Like he said before the whole
cussing thing, he had a porn addiction, and so it took a
while for God to work on him to to work that addiction out of
his soul. Same thing with with drug
addiction, but at least he was. Exactly.
Honest, I almost. I did slip the F bomb in one of
my last shows. And I say it way too much.
But online on air especially, I try to really watch it because I
know the judgment, you know, But also in my real life, I'm trying
to change it. But what I'm saying is it was on
there and I almost edited it out and I thought no, because
because that's who you are. Yeah, because it still happened
and then it hurt you and you're fake.
Then you're fake, like kind of you know.
And people have judged me and sent me little messages like
because I interviewed the Oracle lady and she was like her views
were hers and my views were mine, but it was on my heart to
interview her. So I did and it was a good
interview. There were some things that I
didn't agree with her, but if you only go into the.
The people that you, if you are constantly surrounding yourself
with people that are like yes, yes, yes, they're yes men,
you're never going to learn anything and you're never going
to teach anything and get this. I was going to say you are never
going to grow your flock per se, right?
Because we have. To be honest, yes.
And we have a a ripple effect, right?
Good or bad, Whatever we do, whatever we speak, whatever
actions are, affect other people exponentially.
And so if you're only talking to people that have the same
values, the same beliefs, I mean, Ellie and I are best
friends and we don't always 1000% agree on everything, but
we can have civil, open conversations and we don't.
There's no ever like anger or hatred or whatever in the
conversation because you have to be able to have those difficult
conversations and give tough love to people that the three of
us know. People need that.
You cannot be. You cannot be true in Christ and
still sugarcoat things for everybody when they need to hear
actual. Truth come out of your mouth.
That's because I save them. Sugar coated poo is still poo.
But so I have been told numerous times, basically my entire life.
I'm too blunt. I'm too straightforward.
I'm too offensive. I speak my mind too much.
I'll talk too much, talk too much.
But here's the thing I. Really talk too much.
People are very judgmental towards your personality, but
her personality and mine are 100%.
And I am. I am just like that, yes, that's
what I'm. Always in trouble.
When I when I met you, Heidi, I was like, Oh my God, the three
of us. Like we would definitely have a
very fun girls weekend. So yes.
But the reason I think, Janet, that people.
Are so offended by us to kind of take this to the title of your
show is because they don't want to be held accountable because
Satan doesn't want you to be held accountable.
He wants you to be able to do your own thing, right.
And so Janet, you've told me things, My husband has told me
things where I didn't want to hear them, but they were, you
guys were very truthful. And you're like, no, Like you're
doing this like you're sinning in this way.
And I'm like, yeah. Like, sorry, like, but nobody
wants. To hear it, yeah.
No. And then I get and then I sit in
the corner and I sulk and I'm like, you're right.
But I'm not yelling at them. I'm not, you know, calling them
out and calling them names, right?
Doing the thing that they're supposed to be doing, which is
confronting another Christian when they're in sin.
Hey, you're in sin. I'm doing this in a loving way,
right? But when we tell people hey
like. You claim to be Christian, and I
had this happen. You claim to be Christian.
You're doing this thing, these two things like you can't do
that. You claim to be Christian, like
those don't match and it didn't go well.
And I think that's why that is 100% why people are
disillusioned with with church and with God, right?
Because you know the the biblical saying we never two or
more are gathered in his name, right?
That is church. Hence my husband and I literally
having biblical discussions every single day is having
church. You do not need to be in a brick
and mortar manmade building to live your life in Christ and to
live it appropriately. You do not have to follow rules
and regulations and sacraments, ceremonial magic per se.
Well. Where did Jesus speak?
He spoke on a hill like he right.
He was outside. Like, I'm not saying you always
it's going to snow soon. Like, I'm not going to go
outside in the snow here in a bit.
You know it's cold. I will.
I'll go outside my snow suit. But I'm just like, OK, and this
thing happened to me this weekend.
I wasn't even going to bring this up, but it fits.
So I have somebody very close to me that has been a friend, but
she's also been my enemy because it's it's my husband's exwife.
And so sometimes we disagree. And it's mostly about kids,
usually. OK, well, they're grownups now.
Their kids are grown and they're grownups.
And so they had an issue at a church that I don't go to.
And I've, I've met the pastor. He's fine, OK?
He's a nice person. But I didn't, you know, when you
just feel a certain thing, you know, and I didn't feel that
there so that hence I'm not a patronage of that church.
But she is and I respect it and I've not said anything against
him and I wouldn't because it maybe she does have that with
him, you know, I'm not her. So I I've always just kept my
opinion to myself and said well that's, you know, fine,
whatever, like I've listened to a few sermons.
They're not off the wall or anything.
Like, it's none of my business really, so.
Then her, her son, He's very older.
He's he's going to be a dad soon and they're, you know, new.
His new spat. Well, they're not married yet.
So his girlfriend, they're going to, but they live together.
They're going to have this baby. And there was some issue at the
church where abruptly and rashly there was laying on of hands in
front of the whole congregation without permission.
And I said, and I didn't know anything about it.
Until somebody came to me. So this situation was dumped on
my lap, not dumped, expressed. Everybody has the right to say
how they feel because they were, they were there.
I'm just getting you know the little pieces enough.
Yeah. And I all I did was say.
I'm gonna send you Derek Prince is one of my go to.
I love Derek Prince videos, even though he can be legalistic
because he was Protestant. But I I really like his message.
So I said, oh, I remember this sermon.
I'm gonna send it to you, OK. Like it's it's a good sermon
with some biblical stuff that I think is good for you.
Like he always goes to the Bible and I love that.
So I'm like, I'll send that and I'll pray for this situation.
That's like my whole part of it. Like that's all you know.
And because it's also not not my place.
Like, they're all grownups. Everyone from the mom to the
kids, everybody's grownups. So I I get a message from her,
not just asking but demanding that I lead them back to this
situation. And I'm like, well, I can't do
that because this isn't my place and it's really not your place.
And this is between them. And the Lord and the pastor and
then that's all like we you probably should not be in this.
You know they're all grown people and it's okay and and she
said, well I'm going to repeat to you, you are stepping on my
toes as a mother. And I'm like, that's unfair.
We're supposed to be friends. Like, I tried to be very like,
this is what's up. No, I wasn't gossiping, no, I
wasn't doing these things you pointed your finger and said you
came at me in love with. That wasn't how that came
across, by the way. Like, I'm very blunt.
And I said right back, like no and blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah. This is why.
And I'm not doing that, and I'm never going to do something ever
again in my life that I feel. That I shouldn't like in in a
religious aspect. Okay correct.
Because I was caged and felt this weird way.
And so for me, it's a completely different, it's way more to me,
you know, Right, Right. So then she's mad because you
got you got the gift of discernment.
Well, your departure and your spiritual growth.
And here's the bad As you know, my oldest daughter doesn't speak
to me, even though she brought me a problem, dumped it in my
lap, It was turned around on me and I lost that child.
So it's been four years. I'm not doing that again.
Like it isn't my place. I will pray with you.
I will listen to you. I will let you vent.
I didn't say anything negative on to about that.
I just said I biblically Bible hear Bible and I don't think
that's the way there is some ways to do that.
That wasn't the right way. So in front of a whole parishion
and with a person with PTSD, like I don't think that's okay.
No, I don't you. Know the other.
Biblical part that I think the not you that the forgetting and
I understand that the they're not officially married yet.
Right. Technically, while like split
hairs like technically this doesn't apply.
However, they're having a child together and it sounds like
they're intending to get married, so we're going to work
under. The concept of this applies
because we're getting marriage, getting married.
The Bible says yes, I know your father and mother.
The Bible also says that you should depart from your parents
and become one flesh with your spouse, which means your parents
should have. You should still communicate
with them. You should still talk to them
however their. Their position comes in a
different space. It comes down they don't get to
be the parental role the entire time, and a lot of parents do
that. Where, you know, you could be 60
and they're 80. They're like, no, I'm still the
parents. Like, no, I'm going to listen to
my husband or wife over my mother and my father because
that's how it's Biblically supposed.
Well, and God has an order of things for a reason.
So like this whole situation, first of all, you know the
spouse. We're going to go with spouse.
The spouse agrees with her. You know they have their own
feelings about it. And I and I said so she she
wouldn't speak with me about this unless we all had a meeting
together with this pastor that I have nothing to do with.
And I said I'm not doing that like this has not, this is so
not comfortable for me and I'm not being mean.
I'm just telling you that this isn't my place.
You know, and she said she, she cut me off of all socials.
She is not speaking to me. She is very angry with me.
And I'm like, you are doing this at a very bad time because this
girl is pregnant. She's a little bit fragile,
She's early pregnant. And I don't think it's okay to
do this, no matter even if it was a correct situation, like
you need to remember all the pieces you know.
Women are supposed to be teaching the Bible, so honestly
he should probably going to his dad if he has questions and a
lot of. Which he did, which is why I
knew about it, because it it came to us.
Because I live with the dad. Yeah.
You know, so but they and she's very into this church and I
understand that. But she's got this preacher on a
pedestal, she said to me. So you are wrong in God.
She told me this. She said you are biblically
going against God and I'm calling you out for it.
And I said because I won't lead him back.
And she said, well, I'm going to give this to God.
And I said, well, I'm not God, so I don't know why you're
giving this to me. And I know that came out really
rude. And I just said I, but I'm
always in trouble for stuff like that.
And I I'm like okay, but I will give it to God too.
And I mean it. Let's let it go and pray.
I said let I'll pray with you. I'll meet with you one-on-one as
parents or as friends or just however you feel about it or
whatever I've done. If I've offended you that I
don't want that, you know. But if it has to do with these
other people, the kids. Then we can't.
We are no longer. And I told the kids this I love
you guys. I want to help you.
I am your parent, but I'm not. I am your cheerleader now.
We are on the sidelines of your life, cheering you along and
trying to help you pick you up. If you need us, if you ask.
But if you do not ask of us, we are totally in the wrong
position for that. Because we're not.
And here's the very interesting thing about that story.
And that's going to lead in to my little story.
I thought I should share it. I know I'll.
Be in trouble. The thing about that is if
those, you know, if the children themselves were uncomfortable
with something that happened at church, God is putting it on
their heart that that is not where they are supposed to be.
And people, you need to listen to that message.
But instead they're saying it's demonic.
It's not. It's it is absolutely not
demonic. When when God is leading you to
find another church, there's a reason.
And they're not throwing church out the window.
They're not doing anything that particular church because
something there is wrong and always, always listen to your
gut. And so for me, this is the
second church we've been to in a short period of time.
The first church we went to, we have literally only been there
for one month. And then they had a church
meeting. They wanted to vote the pastor
out because he was bringing in not only political rhetoric into
his sermons. Very, very leftist, very hate
right wing, very blatant. But he was also bringing in
false teachings from people that have, you know, like TV, church
personalities per se that had been arrested or whatever, very
false teachings. And so he was bringing that in.
So the congregation was mad. They want to try to remove him.
They had a vote on it the whole 9 yards.
Fast forward a little bit, We're like, we're very uncomfortable,
so we're going to look for another church.
We go to this church and we are definitely not the type of
people that jump in and sign up to serve and stuff right away
because we want to make sure that it's a good foundation and
a good fit for us. And This is why.
First church, Second church, ever since we started going
there, like nothing was really wrong per se in the sermons.
For the most part, I was going to say for the for the most
part, they're not. They don't include a lot of
Bible teaching, which my husband grew up in a church that was
Bible based. He moved here to start a church
the whole 9 yards. I grew up in a Catholic Church,
so it was very Bible based, whatever.
That's her thing. Most of the churches nowadays,
they will read little pieces of scripture here and there and put
it in their speech. However, they don't focus on
that. They they literally talk.
It's like a just talking and then reading little pieces.
So we're going through this church and I'm like, I'm really
uncomfortable and he's like I'm uncomfortable too.
But unless you know there's something egregious like I I
have to have justification to leave here.
And so we're things are going on and and we're getting a little
more concerned. I guess they have people that
were in the audience that at every service that I call
plants, they are scattered throughout the Chapel, church,
whatever you want to say, whatever religion you are, this
is probably applying a lot of them and they are there to
elicit emotional response during the sermon.
And so there are certain parts where they will, he will pause
the sermon and then, like, people are supposed to clap or
yell Amen or Yep, Yep, the whole time.
And we're like, okay, This is weird because it's like they're
trying to get you that emotional response that they're planting
in you. An emotional response within you
should come from the Holy Spirit, not from something that
man is doing. So then it's like he would have
these weird series and he had one that I I told Ellie about.
It was so cringe. It was a relationship series and
I was so uncomfortable during that.
And I'm like I got to do a show because this this one is
something. It was too much.
And so anyway, we're both still feeling like super uncomfortable
or whatever. And then a couple weeks ago, we
didn't go, we were going to watch it online because my
husband's allergies were bad. So I'm in the kitchen.
Yeah. Today I'm in the kitchen making
breakfast and it comes down and I hear.
So there are most of you probably know there was an
e-mail went out with a lot of allegations in it.
So we're going to do, we're going to have an independent
investigation. Wink wink.
Independent, right, So they keep mentioning this like every week.
Well, finally they had a church meeting the other day.
Family meeting is what it says on the screen when we walked in.
They literally read every single allegation, which, mind you,
there were 32. Oh wow.
Like word for word, for word. And I'm telling you this was on
behalf of four families because the husband and the wife and
each one of these families all were part of the ministry team,
every single one of them, all part of the staff.
So on behalf of all four families, which was very
meticulous documentation in this e-mail, dates, times, exactly
what was said, who was in the meeting, the whole 9 yards.
So you know, without a shadow of a doubt that this happened
because they really. Have just allegations at that
point, right? Okay.
So mind you, and this is an important piece of the story, we
knew about this pastor before we ever started going there because
we looked him up. He had a criminal record in the
past. People can be saved.
People can repent for their sins.
He had embezzled money from a church before.
So you know, we're like, okay, we're going to give him a chance
because everybody deserves a chance.
So we're going to this church and and the whole 9 yards this
comes out, they're reading all of these different points.
And I swear to you, it was like a little kindergarten nanny Boo
Boo thing. The church investigated itself,
so there it was not independent. Okay, the pastor, appoints every
single one of the people that are in positions in the church.
So like his best friend there is supposed to be supposed to be a
separation between the pastor and the finances given what had
happened before and this is in the bylaws.
Very important piece here. And so multiple times in this it
was about financial crimes. He got arrested in this other
state, serves his time, blah blah blah.
Paid restitution came here, started the church.
As soon as the church got up and running and given finances, they
were given corporate cards. He used the corporate card for
his own personal expenses. Didn't really learn your lesson,
did. You.
That looks yucky. And then as the allegations go
on, like I said, there was 32, so I'm not going to name them
all, but some of them were were highly like agreement.
So in a staff meeting he disclosed personal financial
records of employees. Now, mind you, almost every
church, and this has been the last two that we've been to, if
you are a member or a partner or whatever they call it, they want
you to sign up and they monitor your finances to make sure that
you are giving your 10% or more of your money that you bring in.
They want financial records, the whole thing of if you are, if
you are part of this member, partner, whatever the church
wants to call it. So he disclosed personal
financial information of staff members, Red Flag number one.
And then in another separate meeting, he disclosed the
personal financial gifts that they were doing to establish a
secondary church. Wow.
And in this meeting he's well, I know so and SO only makes this X
amount of money, but they donated $3000 into this new
building. Again, if he's separated from
finances, where did that come in?
That's that's so odd that he would want to.
I mean, in any situation, including court, those kind of
documents are really kept private.
They'll say exhibit whatever and then they'll give them correct
the. The thing.
So that's awkward. Like this whole this whole
thing. They're going, this is the
allegation, but stinky Doo Doo poo poo head?
That's not true. It's somebody's pain.
You know what I'm saying? This whole meeting was like that
and then they took questions from the audience and the very
first guy that gets up had a list.
So not only had this guy been charged for embezzlement and
used the the company credit card at the current church, he had
assault charges and so there was a restraining order filed
against him for the pastor that exposed the financial crimes at
the previous place. So this is your.
This is deed there was theft of theft of personal property and
stuff. And so my point in telling you
guys this, this is the second church in a row where the church
had a split, which is not normal and that very short period of
time. And I'm in my 50s, so I've never
had that happen in my life. And this is two in a row.
But whenever you get that inkling that something is wrong,
run. Change church.
Watch something online, get out your Bible and just pray
whatever you need to do. If you have a feeling that
something is not right with that church, trust your gut.
But you did the right thing on it because like she said, she
had a feeling and that she, she literally posted that the next
day like go with your gut and that was the one that thinks
they should go back. But that's her feeling about it.
And like you guys use discernment about it and you
prayed and you did this research and it was.
Like all in a row, like she she feels in her gut that maybe
we're bad people. I don't know who that was for.
It was very passive aggressive and I'm super not like that.
I don't know if it was for me. I don't know if it was for
someone else, like. But of course if you're if
you're arguing with someone and they post something like that,
which is why I don't do that anymore.
They're going to take it that way.
But it literally was. Trust your gut thing.
And I'm like, well, that and even that might be OK for you
and your gut, but for her, for the other kids involved, they
have a different gut feeling. Well, God.
God moves us. God, Maybe it's not even a bad
thing. Maybe he just needs to move
them, to help them, to help somebody else.
Like you. Never know.
Or to help them grow. Yeah.
What were you going to say? Ill.
Our emotions. Can be wrong.
So like trusting your gut with no foundation.
Right. You had a family.
Typically go well. So whether it's biblical or hey,
this person has an arrest record or like whatever it is, but like
your gut is usually telling you something, but it's not always
100% right. You gotta, you gotta go and dig
into that like, well, that was, that was the thing.
Yeah, because like, for him, for my husband, he was praying for
discernment. And for me, because I felt like
I already had discernment in the situation.
I was praying for God to move us to whatever church that we were
meant to be at. And a lot of people don't
understand this, but when you get that feeling that something
is wrong and you're supposed to leave that church that is God
moving you for an ordained specific reason because you
cannot further your growth where you're at and you are needed
somewhere else for a different purpose.
And the other person might still be needed in that church now,
Not with the arrest thing. That's wild.
Like I I would be very concerned for most people in that church.
But, and it's there. Let me let me throw this in
there because I told Ellie this yesterday when we were talking
about it during this meeting, it was like you are only allowed to
clap. When we say clap, you're only
allowed to not to to have anger if it's directed at the people
that wrote this e-mail where the one person's that's there
defending them. And it was very cultish.
And they were very they were very much praising this pastor
and praising like everything he does and like he could do no
wrong. I mean 32 counts.
And my husband and I were like most of these.
We can verify because we were actually in sermons when these
things happened. A lot of them were very
inappropriate language or things that were said during a sermon
or whatever, but it was like this whole thing was to to lift
up this pastor and praise him and applaud for him, and then so
hatred and and violence against the families that exposed.
It like the four families that wrote it.
Weren't allowed to be there and there was like, police there
because you were afraid people were going to get violent, quote
UN quote correct. Yep.
They've never had police at this church ever.
And when we pulled in, I'm like, why are there so many police
officers here? And this, this person that was
exposing things during the question period, and he's
literally reading this list about this pastor, the theater
to me, very relevant and valid. Right, right.
And ever. It's leaving no room open for
anybody to have any kind of, like, true questioning.
Because he already said, like, you can't do that.
Like, unless you're agreeing, agreeing, which that's just
weird, like. And that's why I was like, I
told my husband all along, I'm like, to me, if there's very
cultish, like I said, you have to plant the people in the
audience to elicit the responses that they want.
It's not organic. I'm like, and you have to clap
like a seal when they want you to.
They want you to repeat certain words that he says during his
sermon and he'll be like, say so that and he wants everybody to
repeat those words. And it was almost like chanting
things to me. And we're like, at a rap
concert, and they're like, tell me what it is.
Tell me what it is. It was.
It was very. Uncomfortable.
That's weird. Like, why would you want to be
having repetition come back to you?
Like that's almost just like edification of yourself.
That is exactly my point and that is why I brought up
edification earlier. Because with this and what the
things that he does and he's always saying like you can't get
into heaven unless you follow what I tell you to do.
And I was like. For the Catholics, I was like,
okay, this is like, not, yeah, this is not.
And I'm very happy that my husband got his discernment.
So now that we can move on. And feel comfortable together?
Yeah. And so even if you go somewhere
and you don't feel at home, you don't feel at peace.
There's something like nagging or gnawing at your, you know,
insides, basically, like making you uncomfortable.
That's probably not the right place for you to be.
Well, and you know, Heidi, you had mentioned that you don't go
to church like to a church building, right?
And I know, Janet, now you're on the hunt again.
Yes, again. So hard.
I agree with you guys in the sense of like God can be found
anywhere. Totally agree.
The part where I struggle is like never having.
I'm not going to call it a church, a group of biblically
sound Christians, whether or not you all.
Go to a building or not, but at least that you know on a regular
basis we can hold you accountable.
So because I feel like that's the piece where you can say
you're a Christian and you can read the Bible and you can
honestly do the best you can do. But if you don't have someone
that will be like, no, you're sinning, that's where we can
fall and so. Churches.
Can provide that, but they aren't the only way to do it.
But even if you go to church, are there people that are strong
enough and their faith that they will call you?
I don't think. People act like that too, like
in Mormon church like. So many people were like, I'm
perfect and this is me on Sunday, and then they do
whatever in the dark, you know, And most people are on their
best behavior in church. And my big thing about church
here is just because there's so many Mormon churches, there's
not a lot to choose from on Christian churches here.
But I would love to find a church home.
I think they are good to like, worship together, everything,
All that stuff is really good. But I also feel like in Utah
we're really stunted because. We don't have, we don't have a
ton of options and not that I've checked every single one but it
hasn't felt like, oh this is your place or blah blah.
But I also know, like, it's so important for my my kids.
You know, Like, I want them to know, hey, you have some friends
and God, like these people believe like you, especially
here. Because they don't.
People don't believe like us. Here you.
Know normalize it of sorts, right?
Because if everyone that she knows or he knows.
Everyone. You.
Know Mormon. Or you know they believe in the
Purple Spaghetti Monster. Like you need someone that goes
no like we also believe in the Bible.
We also say a prayer before we eat.
We also like, do these things. I think it's hard for them,
yeah. Yeah, it is hard for them
because especially. Where?
OK, so the Mormon church doesn't believe in the Trinity.
So literally my daughter got in an argument with her friend the
other day. And I always tell him don't
talk, don't talk about religion, church or whatever, Like, but
they weren't, They were talking about God, which I've always
said like, oh God, you know, whatever.
And so she came home and she said that was so stupid.
We had a fight. And I said, what did you have a
fight about? She's 9.
And she said, I told them that Jesus created the world.
And because Jesus is God and and they're the same person and
she's like telling them and they were like, no, Jesus isn't God
because they don't believe in the Trinity.
They believe that Jesus is Jesus and God is God and God is the
Father and Jesus is the Son and the Holy Spirit is somebody
totally different too. So and I guess they got into it
and I and then my husband was like explaining about in the
Bible that it says, you know and God became flesh.
And came down and but then I said, but also don't go tell
your friend that like they they believe what they believe and
you're not to correct her beliefs because that will make a
fight with this parent or whatever, right?
And she just, she didn't understand.
But I understand that she feels kind of on her own island,
probably. I do a lot of the time, you
know, And I just, I she does know, like her one friend is
Catholic and they believe, you know, sort of more similar.
So that's nice. But I mean, I do see it.
I see. And it's hard.
It's a struggle here. It's a struggle.
Like you almost don't want to say it.
Like, I know when I was younger, like I couldn't date anybody
that wasn't Mormon. I couldn't like play with people
that weren't Mormon. Like it's very cultish and and
that's just how they're known to be.
But it's also like. 90% of this state.
I was raised Roman Catholic and I was taught that basically the
Christians who basically anyone who wasn't Catholic, not so much
the Lutherans, the Lutherans like were kind of OK, but like
everyone else was going to hell. And the people who did like, you
know, the hands up music were going to hell and like.
They didn't pray to Mary, so they were going to hell and like
everyone was going to hell. Except for the Catholics.
They're all. On a train?
Well, it isn't it interesting how multiple religious factions,
sects, whatever you want to call them, will do the same thing and
they will instill in you that everybody else is bad outside of
your practicing group. And again, that is judgment.
You are casting judgment upon, you know, people who sing,
people who speak in tongues, even though that's biblical, you
know the whole 9 yards. But almost every religion does
that where they and it it's kind of it's exactly, it's actually
exactly the same as, again, disillusionments in modern day
society where you have to praise one group and this group is
great, and then the other groups you absolutely have to crap on
them because they're not this high on.
The same level, yeah. But I think you know, because
people have argued, well, if you just believe in the Bible, you
know, doesn't matter what version of Christianity you are.
You believe in Jesus, you're going to heaven.
I'm like, I don't know how. Not true.
Not that that's not quite true. And people like, well, if
Christianity was so good or Christianity is the right
religion, why are so many different versions of it?
Well, for me, like, that's a simple answer.
Jesus was tempted in the desert by Satan who used the Bible
against him, but Satan took it out of context.
What do you think? Like all of these other things
are doing like that. I think so much of it was for
me. When I look at religion, I see
so many similarities and things and I'm like, I think a lot of
this was distorted with the Tower of Babel.
Like at that point. I don't think the only thing
that changed was their language, I think.
With the reading, the writings, all of it probably changed at
the same time. So we have no idea what
correlates and what doesn't. You know, like maybe that is
literally their Bible story and then it got changed to that name
or whatever. You know, my, my stepson of me
and I've had this conversation like did you see these, you
know, similarities with this or that?
And I'm like, well, for sure, you know, we'll never know.
We'll never know. I watched this series.
I think there's like 4 parts of it now.
It's on YouTube. It's not, like the most.
It's not like it's a professional video that's put
together. So you have to like, watch it
for the content, OK. But it was a it's by a guy named
Spencer Smith who's a preacher and it's called the third Adam
series. And it talks exactly about that.
How? Because people are like, Oh
well, you know, the Bible. Was just coopted by all of these
older religions, and this series goes into showing how that's not
the case and how there was the one example that pops out is
especially Catholicism, the Madonna and Child, or the Virgin
Mary and Jesus. And it's very it.
It it's. Very sacred in Catholic faith.
And he goes into talking about how that's Ishtar and all of
these different and I think Tamuz was the son.
And so comparing all of these different things that Christians
believe in, showing how and why Christianity is correct and how
actually all of these quote UN quote older religions had
coopted Christianity and why that happened.
So the third Adam series by Spencer Smith.
Well, and think about it in this aspect too.
We are all created unique and very different.
And so a lot of the factions that happen even within
denominations, there are multiple different factions of
Pentecostal or Lutheran or Catholic or whatever you want to
say is because. Their interpretation of
scripture is very different from interpretation of scripture of
what you or I would get. And that's why you have all
these different offshoots in the same religion, because their
beliefs are a little bit tweaked from what the, from what the
main group was and so they just continue to expand and expand
and expand and. One of the things that's going
to rapidly increase, I think is the new A G churches and how
they're corrupting biblical text with spiritual speak, which are
very, very different. And so it's going to be like a
removal of God replaced with. You know, whatever name of
whatever being you think should be at the top.
And I think we're going to see a lot of that because God talks
about that in the Bible. So, Ellie, you.
Not biblical. It's not.
You can't, you know. Correct.
So Ellie, you brought up a a very good like quote or saying.
That kind of goes along with everything we have been talking
about. Do you remember what the quote
was, or do you want me to read it?
Compromise is the currency of corruption and evil.
And I heard that on a podcast and I was like, I literally had
deposit. And I was like, yeah.
And because if you think about all of the things that people
are that we're upset about right now in the world, that things
have gone too far. So I'm going to pick on the
alphabet soup, L, GB, T alphabet soup people.
So it started as a compromise that people of the same sex
could legally get married. And then it became the churches
needed to recognize it. That was the next compromise.
And then it became. Well, it's not just.
The bakers. The bakers have to accept it,
right? Well, and then.
But it wasn't just gays and lesbians anymore then it was.
I don't even know the difference between a lesbian and a gay in a
queer. Like, I don't even know.
But then there was that, and it was trans, and you need to
accept the trans. And then it wasn't just the
adult trans, it was the kids. And you needed to accept that
you didn't have any identity. And then it was, you need to
accept that your kid could be a cat and you should have a litter
box and like, and then it ran well, but then it went so far as
boys needed tampons in their bathroom, like.
So we kept having these compromises.
And that's just one example. And everyone's like, how did we
get here? And I'm like, because we allowed
gay marriage and someone's going to get really mad at me for
that. And I'm totally OK with people
being mad at me. But but it is true and based
based on that quote. That is why today's show title
is so perfect. Devilish, devilish disillusions.
Because compromise is the currency of corruption and evil.
By being weak and not holding boundaries or people
accountable. At work, at home, at church,
government, whatever. Is how we end up with all of
these different agendas. Because, ladies and gentlemen,
pride is the original sin in the Bible.
What? What does that group call
themselves now? Pride and and what is a very
common pronoun pronoun now? It's not just he and she.
It's now and they. They uh huh.
Which is a perversion. A complete and total perversion
of godmaking, man and woman, and the fact that they are not only
putting it in churches, it's in every business.
It's in the government, it is in the schools, it is literally
everywhere because they're banking on putting enough
pressure on all of the human beings that you compromise.
Your morals, your values, and your belief in God to accept
that this is okay. And once you accept that into
your soul, then you are no longer connected to God by any
means. So I I saw this thing or I read
it, I don't know which one and I'm not 100% sure how I feel
about someone to throw it out there.
The reason that they use the day them pronouns is the only they
in the Bible is the Trinity because they are truly three in
one. Any other they that like any
human. OK, maybe that's better way to
say a human who claims to be they is then purporting to be
God because there should only be one thing.
Well, it's also used for demons because they are legion and so
that's kind of scary to me because.
And you know, we've we've struggled with this one because
we do have a daughter that's gay and so we've had to really
struggle with it. And she, yeah, we, she's old
enough to make her decisions. She knows.
She knows the Bible, she knows right from wrong, She knows
everything. But here's the thing we
specifically told her. Look.
Whatever you decide what your sin is, your sin is no different
than ours. But I think that you should
really educate yourself on this whole situation.
But do not get involved in any, any group.
You are very against the pride movement.
I'm not against a person or their sin.
I am against that they are making it this big huge monster
that you can't fight like it's right.
It's impossible. Well, and that's, that's what I
want people to understand because they're probably going
to very much misconstrue what I just said a moment ago.
But you are 100% right, you hit the nail on the head because it
is not the individuals pushing you to change your bathroom,
allow sex offenders in the same bathroom with you, you know,
whatever. All of this other stuff is not
an individual. Individuals can still be saved.
Individuals can still repent of their sin.
It is this monstrosity of a group that wants you to know
that you are not okay if you are not part of their group.
You are not a normal person if you are, if you are a straight
man or a straight woman. You are not accepted in society.
That is exactly what they're telling you.
Well, and it's not just the straightness, it's it goes with
all the groups, it goes with color.
It goes anything that they can use to divide us, they will use,
correct. That goes to politics, that goes
to groups. I mean they are making it so
separatist. They have gone into like, oh,
everybody was inclusive, but we're not.
No one's inclusive anymore. You can't be included.
If you're a gay person, you're going to be a little more
accepted into a situation than my straight white son.
Okay, he he he didn't do anything to choose that.
Like that's who he is. That's who he came out and is.
Why are you demonizing him for? For nothing.
You know he and he feels it. He feels it at school, he feels
it, you know. And so a lot of times I feel
like sometimes the kids are led into that because they if you
aren't identifying as that, then maybe I'm not special because
I'm a straight white girl. You know, straight white.
If everyone is special, known as special first of.
All yes, but they. The other thing too is maybe six
months ago ish, something like that.
Our church had hosted like a women's event and I took my
stepdaughter to it. And three, there was 3 video
testimonials from three women and one of them was this woman
who was going to our church. She was a lesbian.
She was married and she really actually started reading the
Bible, got convicted to the point that she felt like she had
to leave her wife because she realized she was sitting.
And my stepdaughter heard this and the best way I can describe
her two households are Trump and Hillary Clinton.
And she heard this and did not understand.
And it proceeded to be an issue with the mom because our church
does not have an L GB, T alphabet soup person on their
board. And recently and mind you she's
10, 1/2. So like if I want to give
perspective, we're talking just started 5th grade and she goes,
she she tells me one day and I guess she had told her dad and
like I knew but she didn't know that I had known.
She said she was pansexual and something else and I was like
what does that mean to you? Because I know what that means
like as an adult, but as a 10 year old, like what does that
mean to? You what do you think that is?
Yeah, right. She's like, well, it means I
like boys and I like girls. And I said OK and I looked at my
husband and I said you're not going to like me for a minute
and he go he whenever I say that he's just.
Cover your ears, honey. And I look at this little girl
and I go, are you having sex? And she goes, no, I said, are
you is is a, is a boys being penis going in your vagina?
Are you getting naked with something I got?
Like not pornographic, but like anatomically correct like?
Are you having sex? Well, no.
Then, honey, you can't be pansexual because you're not
having sex. There's in.
It's in the work. You're actually asexual, right?
And you're as you should be like I'm so confused and we said
that's the problem. They're not letting them develop
to a point where they can actually make that decision.
And I do feel like some people truly are gay.
I do feel like some people truly are whatever they are.
But some of this stuff is insane.
First of all, like the people that want to marry cars and
whatever and or or. Kids identifying as a cat so
they can demand that. I put a litter box in my class,
right? Even 10 years ago, like, can we
all acknowledge that correct? And it became popular.
Why? Because if they can't
exterminate US1 way, they're going to try to exterminate us
another. That's what this is.
And you? Go ahead.
I remember her, my stepdaughter, coming home last February and
February's Black Pride Whatever month.
And the her teacher in school was going on about Black Lives
Matter and all this other stuff and I picked her up and she
goes, I'm ashamed to be white. Yeah, that's what they wanted to
go And Shravel, this teacher, because I'm like, what are you
doing to these children? She can't help what she is, no
more than they could help being black in the 50s.
Well, and that's, that's the thing.
Because again, disillusionment or the placement by the devil
that you are not acceptable the way that you are, the way that
you were created, you have to be.
Made to feel like you're not, so you can change everything about
the way that you were created to be something that you're not.
And so with the devil being the great deceiver, that is why all
of these things are coming about.
And they're so easy to break people's psyche to make you
believe that you have to fit into.
Whatever whatever group they they put forth at that
particular time, you have to identify with that.
You can't identify with your with what your true self is.
But. And they don't even know what
their true self is? Yeah, they're too little.
Yeah. And I think a lot of these
people, the reason that they don't, they can't find their
identity in Christ because they're going to find it
somewhere else. And for me, I'm like the root of
it. For I think I'm going to dare to
say, everyone, very rarely do I make blanket statements if they
don't want to give up their sin. So if their sin is the Pride
movement, well, that's because in the Pride movement you can do
whatever. You can be whatever.
You can sometimes do drugs, you can sleep with whoever.
There's no accountability. There's no repercussions for
anything because it's free love. It is the hippie movement of the
60s on steroids. Oh, on so many.
Steroids, and it is. It is the birth.
Control pills, not pill birth with baby killing pills.
Like, right, They don't have to have like, I talked to the girls
and I'm like, hey, this whole Plan B thing is, is a Plan B for
a reason. What was your plan A hello.
And they're like, Oh well, I'll just get a Plan B and I'm like,
no, you need. And a like, what's?
What's wrong with you people? Like, come on, this was used to
be a consequence. A natural consequence is you
could get pregnant if you were just doing whatever and you
weren't married. Okay.
Well, then what? Now there's not babies involved
because they don't see them. A baby to them, so.
I'm like, you gotta be careful with this stuff because someday
you're gonna really regret all these soul ties you're making.
You know, this isn't just about babies and Std's.
This is about you're you're gonna take on whatever.
Whenever you're with someone on that intimate level, you're
taking on pieces and exchanging information there, OK?
And that. DNA swapping?
Yeah, DNA swaps and that kind of thing is a dangerous on a whole
nother level now with the with the shots.
And B, it's it's dangerous to your brain.
Like you have no clue what you're doing to yourself right
now and they never get a chance. There's a reason that people
used to court and not date, because when you date, you can
be left alone. You can, and I'm not saying
like, go super prude and never hold hands or like even hug.
Like, that's not what I'm trying to say.
But it's also a fact that when you hug someone, when you kiss
someone, when you have sex with someone, hormones are released
in your body that bond you to that person.
There is a reason we're supposed to wait.
Like, I wish I had waited like all of these things, but that is
so countercultural. It's so taboo now to even be
like you should wait for your husband or your wife.
Well, and the and The thing is, and you had the nail on the
head, people don't want to give up their sin, right?
And so we are so conditioned that instead of searching to
fill yourself, your body, with the Holy Spirit, which will
completely fill you up, we are taught that we have to seek
acceptance and love. Outside of us, outside of
ourselves, through other people, through other means.
That's why people get addicted to drugs, people get addicted to
alcohol, people are sex addicts, porn addicts, whatever, because
they're looking for anything and everything that they can to
fulfill that void within ourselves, right?
Or people go through a series of really terrible relationships,
one right after the other. Because they're looking for
somebody to fill that missing piece inside of us.
And so, especially when you have like nowadays, where if you just
go out and have meaningless casual sex with 600 different
people in a month, that's supposed to be the new norm and
acceptable. When that is very
counterthetical to the Bible, because you are supposed to have
one person that you are bonded to, where you become one person
together. It's not meant for us to be
highly promiscuous, and that's why I like divorce is supposed
to hurt. Like, like all of these things,
like, and I'm not saying that there aren't cases where you
shouldn't get divorced. Actually, I think we've all been
divorced on this show. Like, so, like, I I want to make
that clear. Like, I'm not saying that you
should never get divorced. Like, you know, abuse and things
like that. Like, that's not what I'm
saying. But it's also, it's not supposed
to be easy. That's why breakups suck,
because we give all of ourselves like we're in a marriage and
then we're brokenhearted and it's like, why does it hurt so
much? Because we did something we
weren't supposed. And because half of you, because
you're bonded as one person now and so when you split, that
other half of you is gone. Well, and you're the people are
so easy to make these ties now. Like, I see much more serious
relationships as younger kids than I think we had as kids.
Like, they don't date. I kept asking my son why he's
15, almost 16. I said why don't you date very
much? You know, you're not dating,
you're not out taking girls out or whatever.
And he said we don't do that unless it's serious.
And then? Once it's serious, like, then
you go date and I'm like, that's dumb.
You don't know the person. Then you're in a serious
something, whatever you think is serious, and now you're stuck
with this person. And then you're going to go
spend money and he's like, well, that's how they do it.
And I'm like, that's that's a horrible idea.
The whole point of dating is to see if you like this person,
right? And just and to see what's in
their heart and not yeah, not just surface level, you need to
know the deeper meaning of that person's.
Like, what are they really about?
Yeah, what are you really about? Is he saying Heidi like there's
like group dates and that's how they get to know someone?
No, they just everything is online either they are talking
and that's what they call it. That's literally what they call
like now going steady is. Is not a thing.
It's either you're talking, which means they're talking on
the phone, everything's electronic, everything's phone,
everything's FaceTime, everything's whatever, whatever,
or they're serious. There's only two things.
And I'm like, how do you go from talking to serious if you don't
really spend time with someone And you need to, you need to
see. That you need to see that
person's facial expressions and emotions and you need to be in
that same, that same 6 foot radius and space of that person
to be able to know if you have that connection or not.
You're not going to know if you have a true, genuine spark
unless you are face to face with that person.
Well, and do some things together like go out.
And get an ice Creamer. Go out and go to the movies.
Like, there's none of that anymore.
I do not see that anymore. He's like, that's so weird.
You're so weird. And I'm like, no, that's weird.
You guys are weird. Like what are you?
Don't call me weird. I'm like you, weirdo.
So from a nefarious higher world like New World Order thing,
honestly. Not that I agree with this.
I guess I need to preface this, it's kind of genius, because
then you're less likely to get married.
The birth rate's already plummeting.
A lot of males are very feminine.
The testosterone is plummeting, like, and that means there's no
really a nuclear family. You can have more people in
separate places. You can tax them more because
they're. You're not considered married.
You're not married. Like it's automatically two
separate things. If they're not married, the
woman can live off the system like it's genius in a really
evil way. Well, and think about like all
the movies like Demolition Man or whatever, where where they
don't literally have sexual contact or physical contact.
Yeah, they put on a VR headset. Oh yeah, that one Show to Ready
Player One, same thing. And so that's that's that's
where our society is going. As soon as they got everybody
hooked on tech, it's like you don't have to have a
conversation face to face. You just call them on your cell
phone. Or the porn FaceTime I'm on your
iPad or whatever. Like you never have to have in
person contact. Video.
Yeah, video porn or whatever. And they're like, oh, it's
safer, oh, this is better or whatever.
And the kids get it so early. And I'm like, This is why I
refuse to get my daughter. I did with the boys, my son and.
And his daughter both had cell phones cuz they were from split
families and we wanted to like communicate with them but like
with our daughter that we have together.
I'm like absolutely not. Absolutely not.
Like, not until way later. If if for some reason you do
want to get your kid over a cell phone gab.
Is a. It's like it looks like a
smartphone, but like has no Internet access.
That's what my stepdaughter has. I can recommend Gab.
And then there's also a phone called Pinwheel that can more
grow with them. So like you can allow certain
apps as they get older. Not affiliated with either one,
but like something like that for your kiddo.
Gab and pinwheel are the ones that I know of that that has
like auditoring and like. You can choose who they can send
video message or like pictures to and things like that.
So that's. Nice.
To try and. And some of the things that they
do with the pictures, I'm like he told me something about
somebody at school and everybody saw this and that because she
sent this or he sent that. And I've really ingrained my
son. I'm like, this can be called
child porn. So you cannot do that.
Like you cannot. Be involved in this.
And he's like, I know that everybody does and it And I'm
like, well, wasn't she, weren't they just dying?
Weren't they like, so humiliated?
And he's like, no, everybody does it.
Everybody's seen everybody's crotch basically now like, I was
so thrown. I was like, what?
And he's like, yeah. That's fine.
That embarrassment factor. Now that things that like we
wouldn't normally do in public, people are doing it and posting
it on social media because that's how they become an
influencer, that's how they become money.
That's how they get likes like normalizing, debaucherous
behavior. But that is wild to me even, she
said. Some stuff isn't even sexual.
You're making it weird. Like, sometimes we're just
talking like, guys in a group and then somebody will ask, is
this normal or that normal? Like that stuff.
You go to your parents for what is happening and he's like, no
way. I wouldn't go to my parents for
that. That's weird.
And I'm like, well, it's a lot safer than putting it on a
telephone. I know that.
You know, I'm like, are you crazy?
I mean, he's not. But, like, he's been involved in
this where he's like, guess what happened today?
And I'm like, whoa. And then it's no big deal to
him. He's like, thinks I'm like so
silly for thinking this is so insane and I'm like, what?
I've heard parents in the, like, every day I get more and more on
board with this. I want to go live in the middle
of nowhere. But they're parents mainly of
like, kids five and younger who have been like, Oh my gosh,
you're seeing all the stuff that's happening and they're
like. We're just going to kind of do
like arranged marriages for our kids because we're all going to
go live in a little group. And not kidding.
Z and little Johnny grew up and like, we'll just kind of know
because we'll know the parents and we'll know the family.
We know they haven't done any weird stuff.
Like, it's terrifying. It's terrifying because even
like my daughter with her story, my oldest, we were closer than
anything. And then when I met the guy.
He seemed great. Like he seemed so good and great
and like, no, I mean, my oldest daughter is is more accepting.
My second daughter's really critical of people and she she's
usually right, though and she's like, I don't like him.
And it was like within an hour and I was like, calm down over
there, lady. You don't like anybody.
That's what I told her. I said you don't like anybody.
So all of us were like, ooh, he's this, he's a pilot.
Oh, blah, blah, blah. So great, so great.
No, not so great. No.
You know, after three times of meeting him, he took my daughter
away. And we never saw her again, ever
again. And it's been four years and she
has a baby, like. And so now I'm like, yeah, you I
and I get it with those parents. Like I get it.
Like, I get wanting to go somewhere and, like, know
exactly what's going to come at you because it's terrifying.
I don't know if it's true, but I've heard if you get like 150
people together, you can create your own city and your own mob.
I know. Like I'm I'm about at this
level. I'm always like this is just so
much. I mean, like they want us to try
and raise good human beings in this and and I'm like.
This is so difficult, you know, you try not that some things
aren't good, but like you don't want them to have dangerous
things coming towards them, you know?
And it just seems like it's one thing after another constantly.
But so I'm not, since they've normalized like, all of this
behavior, right? And this is what kids are
expected to act like and do, which again is counterthetical
to biblical teachings. As a parent, it makes it even
that much more important for you to guide them.
And trust me when I say they are going to fight back against you
for trying to instill in them values on the way things are
supposed to be. Heard the I'm pretty sure it's a
Bible verse, but you know. Basically the the idea of like,
raising children the time or raising children to be dragon
slayers or raising the children for a time such as this, like
you were meant to and like that kind of resonated with me.
But I was also like, yeah, but then I heard this, someone had
posted this, and it's not from the Bible.
However, it hits me hard every time I think about it and every
time I'm going through a tough moment, this is what I tell
myself. You can't protect your child or
yourself from their testimony. And I was like the first time I
heard it, I was like, I really don't like that and I don't like
it cuz it's true. So.
Right, right. It's hard because at one some
point you do have to breathe and let go.
And sometimes they're going like and and honestly like, it's been
really sad for my daughter, cuz like the youngest one, she's
little still. She's not even 10.
And she was on YouTube and she came to me hysterical.
And she's like, I like a girl. But I didn't know it was a girl.
I thought it was a boy. It looks like a boy.
I thought this was a boy like I. And she's like having a
breakdown over this. And I'm like, I know it's hard
sometimes to tell, but I know that it's OK, You know?
Just it's OK. I know you like boys.
You thought that was a boy like? She knows our other daughters
gay. Like, I mean, we there's no
hiding certain things, you know. And so she said, but I'm not,
I'm not gay. I think she's got a weird thing
about it now because that situation she's like, I but I
like boys. I'm like, no, I I know, honey.
Like, it's fine. You know, you're you didn't do
anything wrong. And so now you're fighting
against not only that but like Ellie said before, confusion.
It's constant confusion, just like your daughter.
Thought that was pansexual, which isn't pansexual.
That's actually bisexual, but not any of it's sexual at all.
She's asexual. So like you you have to like, go
and you you don't want to have these conversations because all
of it's crap, it's bull crap anyway.
It's it's like, I get that sometimes boys like boys and
girls like girls, but the rest of it's pretty abnormal.
I mean, the rest of it's up on par with like.
Bestiality in some points, you know, like, yeah, it's crazy to
me. And I'm not, I'm not having that
conversation with a 10 year old and I don't want anybody else to
either, you know? Yeah.
And you certainly don't want teachers at school to take over
that. And they're so parental.
Goes back to that big old confusion like I get why she's
confused. I get why they're all confused.
I get it. And let alone whatever they're
putting in, you know, the food and the water and the that's a
whole another thing, you know, like you don't even know.
So it's a it's a really strange time.
I think we just have to really pray all the time and do our
best. But even then sometimes it's not
not what we think it should be like.
I do not think my daughter should be alienating her whole
family because her husband said it's leave and Cleve and she
never talked to anyone again. Like, that's pretty not OK with
me, you know? But he's that Bible honor.
And so it worked, right? And now he doesn't have to worry
about her flying out here halfway across the country
because that was probably the whole point, you know?
I mean, I'm. I don't know it's a control
mechanism. Yeah, yeah, because the flights
are free for him. So it's not about money, you
know? No, it's about it's about
control and keeping her in that very small acceptable bubble
where there is no outside interference.
The only interaction can be with him.
And his family and his people. And his He deems.
Yeah, he deems. OK.
Because he flat told my mom after the last conversation when
lightning struck her house. Right in the middle of us
talking about this situation, lightning struck her house.
Like, that would wake me up, but I guess it's not going to wake
them up. But anyway, whatever.
All I said to her was I loved her.
I would always love her. I would always be here.
And the baby was beautiful and I hope that they were all OK.
And and then he completely freaked out about that.
And I'm like, how do you completely freak out when that
wasn't? I didn't say anything bad, you
know? But he doesn't want her to know.
There's another way. Like oh.
You are still loved. You do still have family.
You do still have people that 100% love you, you know?
But that's just the way it is. I mean, I have to wait till God
intervenes on that one because I feel so tight on that.
You know, like what do you do with it?
Well, and you know, there's a a Bible verse that's very perfect
for that. It's from Romans 5 and it talks
about we glory in our sufferings because we know that suffering
produces perseverance, perseverance, character and
character. Hope and hope does not put us to
shame because God's love has been poured out into our hearts
for the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
And so a lot of people who are going through struggles,
suffering, stuff like that, even when you fully accept God into
your life, it doesn't mean you won't have storms or struggles.
It just means that you will definitely be able to weather
them and come out the other side of stronger person.
And so I think a lot of people don't think about that as well.
They think that you know once you're once you're saved and you
accept God that like everything will be sunshine and rainbows
and unicorns flying out your butt.
That's not true. Not true at all.
That is the time that you will go through probably more
struggles than you've ever experienced because it is a not
only a testament to your faith, but a testament like that quote
says from the Bible, but also your perseverance.
Like how are you going to weather this?
Are you going to weather this? Are you going to give up your
faith because things got difficult or hard so?
Are you going to let say no? No.
No, you're not. No, I'm not that.
I didn't have to pause on that one.
I always go back to Job. I always think of Job because he
lost. And I always tell myself in that
particular situation with my daughter, he lost all of his
children in one day, not just one.
And I didn't lose all of my children, you know?
And so I find myself lucky. I've got a fly that's going to
be irritating. I keep seeing one here too, so
I'm like, you'll have that and flies.
And flies, Yeah. And so I keep thinking to
myself, like, well, at least even though he was, you know,
they always talk about, oh, well, he was restored.
But honestly, he probably still suffered the rest of his life.
Because you cannot replace a child with another child.
That child is always different. And so they don't ever talk
about that part. But as mothers, we kind of get
that, like those children were gone.
And yes, he'll be reunited with them one day, but like, he's
still lost them for now, you know.
So I just have to wait, like, and it and it's always like, do
you, do you not wait? Do you show up and be a crazy
person? Do you like just go to their
house and be like? Get arrested.
Like, what do you do with that? Like people are like, Oh yeah,
if I were you, I would just fly right out there.
I'm like, would you though, like, you know, I mean, it's
that's a freaking tightrope there, you know?
Yeah, because then you would have a police record and then
he'd be like, see, see and use that, use that against you as
well and so. While I I'm going to preface
this with I absolutely think you have every reason to go out
there. Right.
The way I can see him spinning, it is something that I mentioned
earlier, that they're married, you're supposed to basically
stay out of their marriage. And not that I agree with him in
that case, but that's what I find a lot of people who claim
to be Christian who aren't really Christian.
That's what they do. They're just like saying they
twist. They take a Bible verse and they
twist and they take it out of context.
And he used it on her. And I get that it worked.
She was in a vulnerable state when.
He met her. She was, you know, already
coming out of, like a rape. Like she was already in a bad
situation. Shit.
Mentally, like mentally, she wasn't.
OK. I think he saw that.
I think he's a predator. I think she was his prey.
She feels very protected and loved by him.
He makes her feel that way. He builds this little dollhouse
and puts my little doll in there.
And I feel like someday that's gonna get tiresome, you know?
I don't know that we can live that way forever, but if she
chooses, like he can't keep her from me forever because she God
gave her to me and she is mine and what we have, we will have
in the end. So even if he keeps her for me
all the days of my life, which he has told everyone that I am
dead to them and I will never see her again.
And I don't know how you do that to somebody because I know how
close we were and you are hurting her and if you really
loved her, you wouldn't do that to her.
That's not Okay. You know but like I said there's
only so much feet I'm willing to step on because I already, I
already threw that fit in the first.
I mean I'm a very strong personality and I already did
the whole. I can't believe this.
I can't believe you. What are you doing?
Like really sassy mouth because I just assumes my daughter would
back me and she did not you know.
So you got to step back and say okay.
Well, that that definitely didn't that backfired, you know?
And then you get angry. You go through all those same
stages of grief that I went with.
My brother. And honestly, I think it was
easier. And me and my mom talk about
that and she's like, yeah, I couldn't.
Yours is harder because at least I know he didn't have a choice.
He's just gone, you know, she has a choice.
Maybe it's a hard choice that she could come and see her
family. I mean, if she chose to.
And I get that he probably makes that difficult.
I don't really know. I don't know their life.
Maybe she just doesn't want to, Who knows, you know?
She says. I'm this toxic, horrible person
now. But it I find it hilarious since
that was never the way before, you know, it's been ingrained to
her and and that's like it's so easy for for people, for their
emotions to be manipulated and twisted into molding somebody
into something that they're not or thoughts and things that they
don't normally. Accept, yeah and or accept and
and guess who he used to help him do it?
His friend, the pastor, was the one that helped her
psychologically with her psychological counseling and all
I kept saying as a psych nurse was.
Is this person even licensed to do what you're doing with them?
And then it became I was the problem and I am the problem and
and that's all it is. Like you're being intrusive.
You're saying he's not a good person, you don't know him.
No, all those things are true. But also, I don't think that
somebody that's already vulnerable should be counseled
by anyone except a licensed professional because of that,
you know, And then you can go to your pastor after the fact
because if she's really at that point in her mind, like she
wasn't, well, you know, And so it's easy to manipulate.
I mean, it was a friend. Even sometimes, though, with
with licensed professionals, yeah.
The manipulation that goes on is is staggering.
And one thing you know, we're talking about like the devil
interfering basically and and changing your your mindset,
right? It is so important for anybody
and everybody that is struggling with literally anything, whether
it's anxiety, depression, alcoholism, drug addiction,
whatever it is. You have to get your mind right
first before you can expect anything else to change in your
life. Because if you're still, like
Ellie talked about earlier, people not wanting to give up
their sin. If you are an addict and you
refuse to give up that addiction, but you're you're
upset because your life is not improving.
It is not changing. You've got to change your mind
first, because nothing else will matter.
If you don't, well, it's like going to war without a gun.
I mean, you know, like, why would you do that with the whole
army of people with guns, so? Yeah.
The realization I had Janet, as you were saying that is a lot of
people the woke, I guess they're very big on this whole victim
mentality and. If you give your victim
mentality, then who are you? Right.
You're nothing without that victim identity, right?
Because the the devil told you so, the powers that be told you
so that you always have to be a victim or you're just a
faceless, nameless nothing. Well then it makes it also easy
for them to control you, because how could she ever come back to
me? Because I'm a horrible,
narcissistic, terrible parent that apparently abused her.
So how would she ever have me come back around?
And then who meets me or whatever is like, Oh no, she's
fine, she seems normal, oh blah blah blah.
And then how do you rationalize that in your mind?
If you've used that as your crutch, like it could be
anything. But in this particular
situation, if you use that as your crutch to cover up whatever
you're doing to make yourself feel better about what you're
doing, then you're always going to use that.
It doesn't matter a substance or a person or your past.
I could use my past every day of the week.
My past is horrific. I've discussed it often.
My past I have every reason to be on a corner, selling my body
and snorting crack. Like every reason Okay.
But I don't. Why?
Because I would rather help people out of the situation that
I myself overcame. Why would I want to go backward?
Like, why would I live in that mess?
That mess wasn't me. You know, and that's The thing
is. That you can use your testimony
of your life and your story and what happened with you to be
able to affect change and make change or even plant the seed of
change for somebody else. And I literally think that is
our sole purpose in life. It's to basically pay that
forward that we came out of struggles, hard times, whatever.
Like. Talking to somebody about coming
on the show, and this was a perfect example, and I hear this
from people a lot of times, when I reach out to have them come
on, their response is always there's nothing interesting
about me and about my life. I don't have anything to add and
I will guarantee you every single one of those people that
I have talked to on a show. Has had the most interesting
stories about things that have probably made a huge difference.
Yeah, probably helped. They were always just people who
were made to feel that they were nobody.
They were nothing special and you know, conform, conform in
the society and the different groups and labels that we put
you in or you're nothing special.
And that's not true because everybody has a story.
Everybody has things they've been through or experiences that
they've had. Or, you know, whatever the case
may be, God made you the way that he made you for a reason,
and things happen to you for a reason so that you can turn
around and talk about it. I agree.
I totally agree with that. And it's sad that people think
just because you were raised some sort of way doesn't mean
you don't have anything to help or share.
Even even my husband, he was not raised any of those sorts of
way. He he was loved.
He was cared for. His parents are great.
I always say Beaver Cleaver because that everybody can
relate to Beaver Cleaver, but like also he still he still has
abandonment feelings because he left the church.
He still has I don't fit in because I'm not like you.
I still feels like these kind of ways.
And sometimes we'll say different things that are more
meaningful right then maybe my huge story that was like and
then blah blah blah and all this big stuff.
But sometimes for other people, that doesn't relate.
You know, maybe for somebody that had a bad, bad story like
mine, they can relate. But somebody that's more normal
story maybe will relate much better to his story, you know,
That's why we all have to. We're supposed to have human
connection. Why do babies not do well when
you stick them in a crib in a orphanage and don't touch them?
They they literally become so strange.
I mean, the Unabomber, this happened to the Unabomber.
He got hurt and then he had some big, huge thing.
I think he got a burn and then his mom couldn't touch him for
so many weeks and it was like almost a couple months.
And then he was never the same. Afterward, he was never the
same. They said that he didn't process
things as well, even though he was super smart, you know, he
was never the same again, as mother said.
And that that goes to show you the damage that it can cause by
not interacting with other people.
And so many people hole up in their room, play video games,
smoke weed and never come out. And I'm like this is not what
God wanted you to do. Like I'm not saying it doesn't
have its place. I'm not saying that medicinally
some things aren't helpful. I'm not saying I'm not saying
any of that. I'm just saying this isn't what
God probably planned for you and you probably can't even hear it
because you're so involved in whatever you're involved in or
you're so damn self-centered that all you care about.
And I like to look nice, but by golly, if it comes down to my
kids needing me for something or me missing the gym that day,
that's just how it's going to be.
You know, I'm not going to go and do that.
I'm going to take care of the kids that need me because it's
just it's silly to me. But you see these moms now and
you're like, OK, you know, like they're just their little
extension of themselves that, you know, with their LV purse
and their, you know, whatever, it just, and I like to look
nice, like I said. But come on, that's not real.
That's not real. Like, if you have to have that
because you don't feel important without it, that's ridiculous.
If you like it because you like it, then cool, you know?
But like, if you really sincerely think you are that
$3000 or $5000 bag, good for you.
Like that's so stupid waste of money to me.
I'd rather go somewhere you know.
But if. I can do a lot with that with
that. Money.
Do you know Robin with garden how many chickens I could have
with that? Money, right?
It was just, That's so funny. We think exactly alike because I
was sitting there thinking, I wonder how many animals I could
fly foot in our farm. Right.
And I'm just thinking, man, that's like a vacation.
That's like, I mean, that's something fun, you know, I could
take my kids here, go do this or whatever.
And I'm just like, to me, like I could have a bigger house.
Like everyone in our family, they all have nicer houses.
And they got a pool and they got this and they got that.
And my husband's, like, what are we going to do?
Like, do you want to upgrade? I'm like, are you insane?
No. I don't even want to be home
except for the grandparent part. When we retire, like the
grandparent part, I'm down for, like, if they need me home to
watch kids, but otherwise, I don't even want to be home.
Why? Let's go explore.
Let's go see the world. Let's go do things, You know?
I mean, I. I'm the opposite.
I just. I like my sons like that.
My son, he's like, I want to crochet and stay home, yeah.
I I I'm a great crochet. There's a someone I follow
online and she's late 20s, early 30s, and she's like, I'm part of
the grainy gang and just all the things that like the old
grandmas do and I'm like, that is me.
And it's funny because, like, at my age, like the perfect gift is
something I can use at home, like a kitchen gadget or
something. And other people what like?
You know, video games or whatever.
And I'm just like Nope. Anything I can use practical
wise around the house? I could get two freeze dryers
with that kind of money. It's so weird to me.
I'm like, okay, that's cool. Like I have a niceish purse, but
I don't have a $3000 purse. That's wild.
To me, yeah, I don't. I don't need anything like that
because frankly, I don't care. And I don't care about the
vanity and I don't care about what people think, which is a
beautiful segue to end the show because.
Talking about vanity and and selfishness and whatever, so
Philippians 2-3 do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain
conceit. Rather, in humility value others
above yourselves. So take that $3000 that you
would have spent on that purse and pay it forward to somebody
who could really use. That money, you don't have to
give it to a charity, but do something to to pay it forward
and be appreciative of the things in your world that God
gives you, just like my eagle today.
Thank you again, God for doing that, because that was beautiful
and it meant more to me than any $3000 purse ever could.
So ladies, where can people find you at?
You wanna go first? Hiding?
Either way, I'm at Unfiltered Rise on everything.
I'm at Instagram, YouTube, Spotify, All the Places.
Unfiltered Rise Podcast. Miss Ellie.
You can find my Instagram at One Thumb LONE Thumb El.
On YouTube by the same name. I'm mainly just doing my fan
approved Friday videos right now.
I did have 60 some episodes on the Speed Bumps podcast.
That was mine and that is, I don't want to say gone forever,
but it's put on hold for the foreseeable future.
But you can definitely go check that out if you want to.
Because again, she's working on a much higher calling project
and let me tell you, it's a very important one, so.
And I'm just not ready to talk about it publicly, which is why
it's kind of secretive. And I appreciate that that
secretive. Secretive is bad.
We're holding out until the right time because this is the
difference. Because if your kids are always
asked what's the difference between a secret and a surprise?
Kind of like a stranger danger thing.
A secret is something that is never to be told.
A surprise is something that will eventually be told that a
Christmas present or a birthday present or a party.
So surprises are okay, secrets are not.
It'll be a surprise in the future.
Correct. Yes.
That'll be awesome. And it's a it's a fantastic
thing that's in the work. So there you go.
I'm super stoked for it. So for me, for Miss Ellie and
for Miss Heidi, thank you so much for living and listening.
Thank you for giving us your patience and and whatnot and
suffering through the allergies. No tears for Shed in the making,
so have a good one guys, and we'll see you next time.