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All right, enough of that. 
Go to Genesis 30. 

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All right, Have you ever had the
experience of buying a new car 

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and then, well, new to you, but 
then almost overnight it seemed 

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like everyone else had bought 
the same car? 

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Maybe you never paid enough 
attention to Jeep Wranglers or 

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Ford Broncos or Toyota Tacomas 
until then, but the moment you 

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decide that's the vehicle you 
want, you see them at stoplights

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and in the parking lots and at 
the grocery store. 

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Or maybe you just start 
wondering if people got together

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and secretly said we're all 
going to get the same car as as 

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this guy. 
Psychologists have a name for 

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this. 
It's called the Bader Meinhof 

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phenomenon. 
Easier to remember. 

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It's also called the frequency 
illusion. 

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And the idea is pretty simple. 
What it is, is this. 

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It's that your brain is 
processing an overwhelming 

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amount of information, 
especially these days. 

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Maybe you have talked about it 
or heard about it or read about 

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it. 
But the amount of news 

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information we get with the 24 
hour news cycle, our brain was 

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never meant to understand what 
was happening in Paraguay to the

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same level as what's happening 
in our community. 

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But we get all this information 
that's overwhelming and 

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sometimes it results in an 
increase in anxiety, right? 

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So a lot of times whatever 
you're focusing on is what gets 

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most of the attention is 
essentially what happens here. 

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Your brain has so much 
information and it needs to make

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these split decisions on what to
remember and what not to. 

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If you hear something but your 
brain marks it as not important,

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you tend to forget about it. 
That's why sometimes you'll 

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rewatch ATV show, that's your 
favorite TV show, and something 

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will happen and you'll say, oh, 
I forgot that that happened 

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because that little part wasn't 
as important. 

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But you remember the bigger 
moments. 

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That's why sometimes somebody 
that you love can be like, don't

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you remember when I told you 
blah, blah, blah, blah, And 

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you're like, no, because you're 
important to me. 

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But that story wasn't most of 
us. 

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Don't say that out loud. 
Your brain is constantly in the 

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process of rewiring itself every
single day. 

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Now, that alone might give you 
more anxiety. 

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You're like, Oh no, I thought it
was set, but it should give you 

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hope. 
You can see this in other ways 

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all the time. 
I remember this happened to 

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Cassie and I in specific when we
were trying to have our first 

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baby. 
But a couple begins trying to 

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have a baby and suddenly it 
feels like every other Facebook 

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post is another pregnancy 
announcement. 

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And every trip to Target seems 
to include a sale on strollers. 

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Maybe you started thinking about
buying your first house and now 

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every time you drive through 
town, you see all the for sale 

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signs and you didn't know how 
many were there, but they were 

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there the whole time. 
You just weren't looking for 

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them because it wasn't important
to you. 

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Your attention has simply 
shifted towards something that 

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is newly important to you, 
right? 

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An interesting thing about this 
phenomenon is that it doesn't 

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just happen with cars or houses 
or babies. 

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It happens with your heart. 
Whatever captures your attention

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starts changing your perspective
and your heart as well. 

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If your minds become consumed 
with what you don't have, then 

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you start to slowly become an 
expert at noticing everybody 

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else who has something that you 
don't. 

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If you start to see promotions 
that you didn't get, or 

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vacations that you can't afford 
or relationships that you wish 

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you had, maybe you see 
opportunities you think you 

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missed and blessings that seem 
to belong to everybody except 

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for you. 
The dangerous thing there is for

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Cassie and I, what it ended up 
feeling like was it was like God

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had X amount of babies and He 
was like, who wants a baby? 

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Not you guys. 
This time He wasn't choosing 

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somebody over us. 
What God blessed somebody else 

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with had nothing to do with us. 
But it's hard not to feel that 

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when you're in the middle of it,
right? 

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The irony is that nothing about 
our circumstances changes as 

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soon as we start to notice 
different things. 

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Maybe even notice. 
Like once you start going to 

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church, now all of a sudden you 
notice, oh, the bottom of my 

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cook from cup from cookout, It's
got a scripture on it. 

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Or you start hearing a song. 
You're like, I think that's a 

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Christian song. 
Different things stand out 

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because now your mind and your 
heart has shifted. 

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But the only thing that changed 
there was your focus. 

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But because your attention is 
constantly drawn to what's 

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missing, sometimes some of us 
have a problem thinking about 

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anything other than the holes 
that we feel like we've got in 

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our life. 
And it makes them feel bigger 

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than they are. 
The Bader Meinhof phenomenon or 

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the the the illusion as we were 
talking about it. 

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It might be difficult to 
remember by name, but when you 

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look at it through this filter, 
when you're focused on what 

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you're missing, the Bible has a 
word for it. 

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And it's this. 
It's envy. 

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Envy is the sin behind 
comparison. 

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Most people, if you were to say,
what's your struggle, where do 

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you struggle the most? 
Most people won't say, oh, I'm 

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super envious and I know it. 
Nobody says that. 

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As a matter of fact, we often 
define the difference between 

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jealousy and envy. 
Is this that jealousy is when 

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you wish you had something and 
envy is when you wish you had 

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something instead of somebody 
else. 

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And even that's not really a 
full definition, but we'll dive 

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into that in just a little bit. 
Before we read Genesis 30, I 

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want you to have a little bit of
a background on where we are in 

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this. 
We just talked about last week, 

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we spoke about Joseph a little 
bit that, you know, the favorite

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child of Jacob. 
But this is this is before 

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Joseph, before we read Genesis 
30, I want you to know Jacob had

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fallen madly in love with a 
woman named Rachel. 

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And Jacob, well, he worked seven
years to marry her. 

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That's a long time, only to be 
deceived by her father Laban, 

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who secretly gave him Rachel, 
Rachel's older sister Leah 

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instead. 
Well, that's awkward. 

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But Jacob eventually married 
Rachel as well, and that's 

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awkward, but he had to wait 
another seven years to do it. 

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Laban was like, ah, can you 
blame me? 

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Leah was older, so I need to 
marry her off first. 

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But hey, if you work another 
seven years, then you can have 

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Rachel. 
I wonder what it was like for 

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those seven years where he's, 
he's married to Leah and he's 

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like, I'm, I'm going out to 
work. 

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She's like, I know what you're 
going to work for 14 years total

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in order to marry Rachel. 
And then he finally marries her.

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And that's where we are here. 
But the damage, I want you to 

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know, had already been done. 
And here's what I mean by this. 

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Leah. 
Leah knew that she wasn't the 

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one that Jacob had chosen. 
Leah knew that Rachel was the 

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one that Jacob loved the most. 
As a matter of fact, when we 

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read that story of Joseph last 
week, it said he loved Joseph 

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the most because it was Rachel's
son. 

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To make matters more painful, 
God bless Leah with children. 

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And Rachel was unable to 
conceive children. 

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So each sister possesses the 
very thing that the other one 

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desperately wants. 
Leah is longing to be loved and 

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Rachel is longing to be a 
mother. 

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And each one has what the other 
one wants. 

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Now listen to this starting in 
verse one of Genesis 30 says 

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when Rachel saw that she wasn't 
having any children for Jacob, 

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she became jealous of her sister
and she pleaded with Jacob. 

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She says to Jacob, give me 
children or I'll die. 

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Dramatic. 
OK. 

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Then Jacob became furious with 
Rachel. 

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Am I God? 
That might be a conversation 

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today, right? 
He's the one who has kept you 

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from having children. 
And then Rachel told him, take 

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my maid Bilhah, and sleep with 
her. 

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That always goes well in the 
Bible. 

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She'll bear children for me, and
through her I can have a family,

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too. 
So Rachel gave her servant 

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Bilhah to Jacob as a wife and he
slept with her. 

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Bill Hobb became pregnant and 
presented him with a son. 

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Rachel named him Dan. 
Well, what does Dan mean in this

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era? 
Well, she named him Dan, for she

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said, God has vindicated me. 
He's heard my request and given 

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me a son. 
So it's kind of like in your 

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face verse 7. 
Then Bill Hobb became pregnant 

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again and gave Jacob a second 
son. 

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Rachel named him Naphtali, for 
she said I've struggled hard 

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with my sister and I'm winning. 
Do you all know what your name 

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means? 
OK, could you imagine? 

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Like, oh, that's such a 
beautiful name. 

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What does it mean? 
Oh, it means my mom was 

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struggling against her sister 
and she won. 

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Take that, auntie. 
Like, that's what it means. 

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Meanwhile, Leah realized she 
wasn't getting pregnant anymore 

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so she took her servant Zilpah 
and gave her to Jacob as a wife.

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Soon Zilpah presented him with a
son. 

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Leah named him Gad and said how 
fortunate am I? 

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And then Zilpah gave Jacob a 
second son and Leah named him 

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Asher, for she said what joy is 
mine now the other women will 

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celebrate with me. 
Jacob ends up having 12 kids 

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amongst 4 women married to two 
of them and can't see where envy

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might enter into the picture 
here. 

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Envy is one of those sins that 
doesn't make us think we 

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struggle because we only picture
it in extreme forms. 

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We imagine somebody who can't 
stand another person's success 

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or someone who wants to take 
what belongs to somebody else. 

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But Envy is much sneakier than 
that because it normally begins 

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with comparison. 
The overall title for this 

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series. 
The next 5 weeks take us all the

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way to the end of July. 
It's called the Open Secret of 

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Sin. 
Do you all know what an open 

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secret is? 
An open secret is something that

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everybody knows but nobody does 
anything or says anything about.

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If y'all think back a few years 
to the producer and director 

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Harvey Weinstein and how he had 
been abusing women in the 

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Hollywood circuit for years and 
years and years. 

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And when it came out, there was 
just celebrity after celebrity. 

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It was like, Oh yeah, we knew 
that. 

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00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:00,200
It's what spawned the whole Me 
Too movement. 

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00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:03,600
And all I could think when I'm 
reading This is why didn't you 

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00:09:03,600 --> 00:09:05,880
do something about it? 
Now, it's not that simple. 

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00:09:05,880 --> 00:09:08,280
And I get it because sometimes 
powerful people are hard to to 

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00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:10,840
to take down and they have the 
money to silence people or 

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00:09:10,840 --> 00:09:12,800
whatever. 
But decades this went on and it 

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00:09:12,800 --> 00:09:14,920
was considered an open secret. 
Let's bring it a little closer 

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00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,320
to home. 
How about in the Christian music

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00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:18,240
scene? 
Something came out from Michael 

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00:09:18,240 --> 00:09:21,520
Tate Just about a year ago, 
Michael Tate was one of the 

200
00:09:21,520 --> 00:09:25,040
founding members of DC Talk. 
He was a front man for Newsboys.

201
00:09:25,040 --> 00:09:28,040
And then it came out that he had
been abusing men behind the 

202
00:09:28,040 --> 00:09:30,520
scenes for decades. 
And in the Christian music 

203
00:09:30,520 --> 00:09:33,320
scene, nobody said anything. 
It's an open secret. 

204
00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:35,440
They know it, but nobody's going
to talk about it. 

205
00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:38,400
Not my circus, not my monkey. 
Guess what? 

206
00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:41,720
God's Kingdom is your circus. 
And it's a really big circus. 

207
00:09:41,920 --> 00:09:43,520
We got a lot of monkeys we got 
to take care of. 

208
00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:46,600
We might as well do it together.
So here's the problem. 

209
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:50,200
Within the church itself, I 
believe that there are open 

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00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:53,360
secrets of sin. 
There are sins that we tolerate 

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00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:57,240
inside the walls of the church, 
inside the place that God calls 

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00:09:57,240 --> 00:10:00,520
to make holy. 
And because everybody struggles 

213
00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:02,480
with it and they don't want to 
get called out, and nobody calls

214
00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:04,280
it out and anybody else, well, 
we're just going to call it out 

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00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:06,920
for all of us. 
One of them is envy. 

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00:10:07,640 --> 00:10:10,240
We've got to kill it before it 
kills the things that are most 

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00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:12,360
precious to us. 
I want you to think about how 

218
00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:15,200
many different areas of life 
that envy touches. 

219
00:10:16,800 --> 00:10:19,160
A woman scrolls through social 
media long enough and suddenly 

220
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:21,400
every picture reminds her of the
body that she wishes that she 

221
00:10:21,400 --> 00:10:24,160
had. 
Or a man watches the promotions 

222
00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:26,840
of his coworkers, and before 
long he can't even enjoy the job

223
00:10:26,840 --> 00:10:29,680
that God has already provided 
for him because he's convinced 

224
00:10:29,680 --> 00:10:31,600
that somebody else is getting 
ahead faster. 

225
00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:34,440
Or how about a couple that's 
longing for children and they 

226
00:10:34,440 --> 00:10:36,040
notice those pregnancy 
announcements? 

227
00:10:36,280 --> 00:10:39,640
Or a single adult that notices 
every engagement and they're 

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00:10:39,640 --> 00:10:42,160
longing to be married? 
How about a pastor that notices 

229
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another church that's growing 
faster, or a parent that notices

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another family's highlight reel 
on social media and just assumes

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that they're doing everything 
right while they're doing 

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everything wrong? 
None of these things that you 

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notice are sinful by themselves.
It's OK to have desires and 

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goals, but comparison has a way 
of turning admiration into envy 

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if you're not careful. 
We follow people online that we 

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think have it all together and 
we're just like desperately 

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like, help us do it. 
But we also kind of resent them 

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because we wish we had it. 
The most frightening part about 

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this is that our minds don't 
just notice what we value, they 

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start to reinforce it. 
The more that you dwell on what 

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you lack, the more evidence your
heart is going to find that 

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everyone else has it better than
you. 

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Before long, you're not even 
living in reality anymore. 

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You're living in a story of 
comparison that somebody else 

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wrote for you and it wasn't the 
Lord. 

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We start to believe that if only
we had their marriage or their 

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career or their body or their 
opportunities or their gifts or 

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their family, then we would 
finally be content. 

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00:11:37,240 --> 00:11:39,640
And again, we would never say 
these things out loud, but it's 

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what our heart believes and most
of us know it. 

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As I'm talking about it, that's 
exactly how envy works. 

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00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:47,080
And it doesn't just convince you
that someone else's life is 

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good. 
It convinces you that your own 

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life can't be good until it 
looks like their life. 

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00:11:52,280 --> 00:11:54,360
But the problem is that 
finishing line is always moving,

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isn't it? 
Once you think you've gotten 

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there, it shifts again. 
It's a never ending race and 

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it's awful. 
I think it's one of the most 

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dangerous open secrets in the 
church today. 

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I just want to highlight two 
things that envy does to us. 

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The first one is this. 
Envy makes us blind to our 

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blessings. 
Envy will always make you blind 

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00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:16,840
to your blessings. 
One of the saddest parts of the 

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story of Rachel and Leah is that
neither Rachel nor Leah were 

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00:12:19,480 --> 00:12:21,720
able to enjoy the blessing that 
God had already given her 

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00:12:21,720 --> 00:12:24,320
because each one was consumed by
the blessing that she believed 

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00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:25,880
she was missing. 
You don't hear Leah saying, 

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00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:27,480
well, thank goodness I have 
these kids. 

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00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:30,240
And you don't hear Rachel 
saying, well, thank goodness I 

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00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:32,680
got a man that loves me. 
Now they're just focused on 

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their missing parts. 
And you know what's awful? 

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They're sisters. 
They don't act like it, do they?

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00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:40,800
But Leah desperately wanted 
Jacob's affection. 

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00:12:40,800 --> 00:12:43,280
And if you read through Genesis 
29 before that, every time she 

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00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:45,640
gives birth to another son, you 
can almost hear hope in the 

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00:12:45,640 --> 00:12:48,560
names that she chooses, that the
children that she gives birth 

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00:12:48,560 --> 00:12:49,800
to. 
Before what I read to you this 

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00:12:49,800 --> 00:12:53,080
morning, they translate to 
things that basically say, maybe

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00:12:53,080 --> 00:12:55,920
now my husband will choose me. 
Maybe now he'll become attached 

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00:12:55,920 --> 00:12:57,520
to me. 
And she had children, but she 

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00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:59,680
couldn't enjoy her children 
because all she could see was 

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00:12:59,680 --> 00:13:03,920
the love that she didn't have. 
Rachel heard the exact opposite 

283
00:13:03,920 --> 00:13:06,280
problem when she was having 
discussions with her husband. 

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00:13:06,280 --> 00:13:07,960
She had Jacob's heart and she 
knew it. 

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00:13:08,560 --> 00:13:11,040
She was the woman he worked 14 
years to marry. 

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00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:12,880
You think she never rubbed that 
in her sister's face? 

287
00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:16,200
But she couldn't even enjoy his 
love because all she could see 

288
00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:18,640
was the way that God was 
blessing Leah with children. 

289
00:13:19,400 --> 00:13:22,120
And this is what envy does. 
It doesn't convince you that 

290
00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:24,760
your life is terrible. 
It just convinces you that 

291
00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:27,880
you're missing one piece that's 
so important that this one 

292
00:13:27,880 --> 00:13:30,440
missing piece overshadows 
everything that God has already 

293
00:13:30,440 --> 00:13:33,680
placed in your hands. 
Envy has a way of magnifying 

294
00:13:33,880 --> 00:13:36,200
what is absent until you're 
blind to what is present. 

295
00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:40,000
Matthew chapter 20. 
Let's go and go to the Gospels. 

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00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:43,880
Jesus tells this story. 
And to be honest, I kind of 

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00:13:43,880 --> 00:13:46,040
relate to the people in the 
story, but Jesus is right and 

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00:13:46,040 --> 00:13:50,400
I'm not in Jesus chapter 20 or 
sorry, Matthew chapter 20. 

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00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:52,680
This is the book of Jesus. 
The whole thing is the book of 

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00:13:52,680 --> 00:13:54,840
Jesus. 
All right, Matthew chapter 20, 

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00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:57,800
starting right in verse one. 
It's the parable of the vineyard

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00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,280
workers. 
Listen to this. 

303
00:14:00,440 --> 00:14:03,760
Jesus says the Kingdom of heaven
is like a landowner who went out

304
00:14:03,760 --> 00:14:06,160
early one morning to hire 
workers for his vineyard. 

305
00:14:06,360 --> 00:14:09,080
He agreed to pay the normal 
daily wage and sent them out to 

306
00:14:09,080 --> 00:14:11,600
work. 
Yay, God's contributing to the 

307
00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:15,280
economy, all right at 9:00 in 
the morning, as he was passing 

308
00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:17,320
through the marketplace and saw 
some people standing around 

309
00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:19,440
doing nothing. 
And so we hired them, telling 

310
00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:21,360
them he'll pay them whatever was
right at the end of the day. 

311
00:14:21,360 --> 00:14:24,480
So they went to work in the 
vineyard at noon, and again at 

312
00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:27,760
3:00 he did the same thing. 
This guy's just hiring people 

313
00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:31,480
all day. 
And then at 5:00 that afternoon,

314
00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:35,480
he was in town again and saw 
some more people standing around

315
00:14:35,480 --> 00:14:37,200
and he asked them, why haven't 
you been working today? 

316
00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:38,720
And they said, well, nobody's 
hired us. 

317
00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:41,920
That's a good answer. 
The landowner told them, won't 

318
00:14:41,920 --> 00:14:45,120
go out and join the others in 
the vineyard that evening. 

319
00:14:46,240 --> 00:14:48,680
He told the foreman to call the 
workers in and pay them, 

320
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:50,560
beginning with the last workers 
1st. 

321
00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:54,960
And when those hired at 5:00 
were paid, each received a full 

322
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:58,200
day's wage. 
But then those who were hired 

323
00:14:58,200 --> 00:15:00,480
first came to get their pay, and
they assumed that they would 

324
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,080
receive more, but they too were 
paid a day's wage. 

325
00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:07,120
When they received their pay, 
they protested to the owner. 

326
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:10,040
They said these people only 
worked an hour, but you paid 

327
00:15:10,040 --> 00:15:11,320
them just as much as you paid 
us. 

328
00:15:11,320 --> 00:15:13,080
You worked all day in the 
scorching heat. 

329
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:17,800
And he answered one of them, 
Friend, I haven't been unfair. 

330
00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:20,600
Didn't you agree to work all day
for the usual wage? 

331
00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:24,280
Take your money and go. 
I've wanted to pay this last 

332
00:15:24,280 --> 00:15:26,520
worker the same as you. 
Is it against the law for me to 

333
00:15:26,520 --> 00:15:30,200
do what I want with my money? 
Should you be jealous because 

334
00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:34,520
I'm kind to others? 
There's no good answer to that. 

335
00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:39,160
Yes. 
And that's where then the famous

336
00:15:39,160 --> 00:15:42,000
saying comes, he says. 
So those who are last now will 

337
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,840
be first then, and those who are
first will be last. 

338
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:48,120
I mean, to put this in modern 
terms, I want you to imagine I 

339
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:49,680
used to work at Target, so I use
Target. 

340
00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:52,480
You clock in at 9:00 and you're 
working from 9:00, let's say 

341
00:15:52,480 --> 00:15:55,120
9:00 to 8:00 that night, 9:00 AM
to 8:00 PM. 

342
00:15:55,120 --> 00:15:57,840
You've got a long shift and you 
agree to do it. 

343
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:01,160
I don't know, 100 bucks. 
I'm just throwing numbers out 

344
00:16:01,160 --> 00:16:03,240
there. 
And other people come in at 10 

345
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:06,560
and people come in at 12, and 
people come in at 5, but you're 

346
00:16:06,560 --> 00:16:09,160
all salaried. 
You're not an hourly worker. 

347
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:12,040
You've all agreed to get $100 to
come into work that day. 

348
00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:14,880
Everybody's doing what they 
agreed to do, and they're 

349
00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,520
getting what they agreed to 
receive. 

350
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:19,360
But you're upset because it's 
not fair. 

351
00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:24,360
I don't know if your parents 
ever told you this life's not 

352
00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:28,880
fair, But I'm going to tell you 
this. 

353
00:16:29,360 --> 00:16:31,440
You better be good that you're 
not the one who's in charge of 

354
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:33,600
what is fair and just. 
You better be glad that your job

355
00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:36,000
is not to be the judge of the 
universe because you would have 

356
00:16:36,000 --> 00:16:38,360
taken a whole lot of people, 
probably including yourself. 

357
00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:42,680
The whole beauty of grace is 
that it makes life unfair. 

358
00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:46,640
You and I are walking out and 
living a life that the angels 

359
00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:48,560
would have been cast out of. 
We just talked about that 

360
00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:50,960
earlier. 
Don't talk to me about what is 

361
00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:53,160
fair. 
The whole beauty of the gospel 

362
00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:56,800
is we don't get what we deserve.
So we can't get so focused on 

363
00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:58,840
what this one guy's making for 
working an hour. 

364
00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:01,840
Just because we worked 8 hours 
or 10 hours or whatever. 

365
00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:05,240
We had an agreement, right? 
OK, Jesus is telling this story,

366
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:09,240
and he's telling it because 
people were not understanding 

367
00:17:09,760 --> 00:17:12,839
that the people who were coming 
to the Kingdom late in life or 

368
00:17:12,839 --> 00:17:15,720
last second were just as 
valuable to the God who created 

369
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:18,359
them as those who had lived 
their whole lives serving him. 

370
00:17:19,560 --> 00:17:21,839
You don't do it so you can get 
more favor from God. 

371
00:17:21,839 --> 00:17:23,720
You do it because it's the right
thing to do when you love God. 

372
00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:25,480
And the more that you love 
somebody, the more that you love

373
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:29,160
the things that matter to them. 
That's why Jesus ends that 

374
00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:31,840
parable by saying, should you be
jealous because I'm kind to 

375
00:17:31,840 --> 00:17:35,680
others? 
The circumstances of the workers

376
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,960
didn't change. 
Their paycheck didn't change. 

377
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:39,960
The only thing that changed is 
what they were looking at. 

378
00:17:40,360 --> 00:17:42,960
If they had no clue how long the
other people worked or what the 

379
00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:45,840
other people were getting paid, 
they would have said this was a 

380
00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:47,520
good day's work and it was a 
good day's wage. 

381
00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:50,040
They would have been content. 
It's impossible to be content 

382
00:17:50,160 --> 00:17:51,320
when you're looking at other 
things. 

383
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,360
Gratitude disappears the moment 
that comparison enters the 

384
00:17:54,360 --> 00:17:57,000
picture. 
But isn't that exactly what 

385
00:17:57,000 --> 00:18:00,480
happens to us too? 
We think we thank God for the 

386
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,520
job that we got until somebody 
else gets promoted. 

387
00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:05,360
Or we love our career path until
we realise we missed out on the 

388
00:18:05,360 --> 00:18:07,760
college experience. 
Or we love our home until we 

389
00:18:07,760 --> 00:18:09,840
walk through someone else's home
and then we're like, man, why 

390
00:18:09,840 --> 00:18:12,800
don't I have a two-story? 
Or we enjoy our car until 

391
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:16,320
somebody buys a newer one. 
We're content with our church 

392
00:18:16,320 --> 00:18:18,240
until we hear about another 
ministry that's got an exciting 

393
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:20,080
group or event happening. 
And we're grateful for our 

394
00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,480
spouse, aren't we? 
Until we begin comparing our 

395
00:18:22,480 --> 00:18:27,040
marriage to a carefully edited 
moment we saw online, nothing 

396
00:18:27,040 --> 00:18:29,480
about God's blessings has 
actually changed in any of these

397
00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:31,480
scenarios. 
The only thing that changes is 

398
00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:34,760
where we fixed our attention. 
And envy is so deceptive. 

399
00:18:35,160 --> 00:18:37,600
The second you say you don't 
struggle with envy, you have 

400
00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:40,760
already deceived yourself. 
It only has the power to 

401
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:43,360
redirect your attention away 
from the blessings that God has 

402
00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:45,120
laid out in front of you. 
And before long, you're living 

403
00:18:45,120 --> 00:18:47,600
with the illusion that God has 
been better to everyone else 

404
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,960
than He's been to you, when in 
reality, you just stop noticing 

405
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:53,080
all of His goodness because 
you're consumed with His 

406
00:18:53,080 --> 00:18:54,760
goodness in somebody else's 
story. 

407
00:18:56,360 --> 00:18:58,240
One of the oldest stories in the
world is the story of King 

408
00:18:58,240 --> 00:19:00,040
Midas. 
How many of y'all are familiar 

409
00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:00,880
with King Midas? 
Right. 

410
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:02,840
So King Midas, he had the golden
touch. 

411
00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:04,880
It's part of Greek mythology. 
I've been brushing up on some 

412
00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:07,640
Greek mythology. 
And according to the legend, 

413
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:09,960
Midas was given one wish. 
And he asked that everything he 

414
00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:12,160
touched would be able to turn to
gold. 

415
00:19:12,520 --> 00:19:14,400
And at first, it seemed like it 
was the greatest blessing 

416
00:19:14,400 --> 00:19:15,760
imaginable. 
He didn't have to worry about 

417
00:19:15,760 --> 00:19:18,400
how many coins he had anymore 
because trees, when he touched 

418
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,560
them, became gold. 
Furniture became gold. 

419
00:19:21,560 --> 00:19:23,880
But it didn't take long before 
the blessing became a curse. 

420
00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:27,440
And the story of King Midas, he 
goes to eat his food and it 

421
00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:30,160
turns to gold. 
He goes to drink his water and 

422
00:19:30,160 --> 00:19:33,720
it turns to gold. 
And some versions of the story, 

423
00:19:33,720 --> 00:19:36,040
even his daughter was 
transformed into gold when he 

424
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:39,720
hugged her. 
King Midas became so consumed 

425
00:19:39,720 --> 00:19:42,360
with what he didn't have that he
lost the ability to enjoy the 

426
00:19:42,360 --> 00:19:43,920
things that were already right 
in front of him. 

427
00:19:45,120 --> 00:19:48,720
How many of y'all remember an 
auto auto place That was their 

428
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:50,440
slogan was trust the Midas 
touch. 

429
00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:55,320
As a kid, I was like, I don't 
even have a car. 

430
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:56,960
And I'm like, I know how that 
story ends. 

431
00:19:57,080 --> 00:20:00,560
I'm touching an I car when I get
older. 

432
00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:02,840
I understand that it's just a 
myth. 

433
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:04,680
I understand it's not a biblical
story. 

434
00:20:04,680 --> 00:20:07,400
But there's a reason why that 
story has endured for thousands 

435
00:20:07,400 --> 00:20:08,880
of years. 
It tells the truth about the 

436
00:20:08,880 --> 00:20:12,440
human heart. 
We have this remarkable ability 

437
00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:16,160
to believe that one more thing 
or one more relationship or one 

438
00:20:16,160 --> 00:20:19,520
more achievement is going to 
finally satisfy us. 

439
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,320
And we become convinced that 
contentment is just waiting 

440
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:25,480
beyond that one thing. 
But like I said earlier, that 

441
00:20:25,480 --> 00:20:27,480
finish line, that one thing, it 
changes, doesn't it? 

442
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:31,360
Now there's one more thing. 
I wonder what it might look like

443
00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:34,440
in our community today. 
Could you imagine, oh, 

444
00:20:34,440 --> 00:20:36,240
hypothetical, I don't know. 
I'll pick a service branch, a 

445
00:20:36,240 --> 00:20:40,680
Marine, Let's just say that. 
Could you imagine a Marine who's

446
00:20:40,680 --> 00:20:42,800
convinced that one more 
promotion will make him happy? 

447
00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:45,920
And so he tells himself, once I 
make staff Sergeant, life will 

448
00:20:45,920 --> 00:20:49,240
settle down. 
So he gets promoted for about 

449
00:20:49,240 --> 00:20:51,560
two weeks. 
He is thrilled, and then he 

450
00:20:51,560 --> 00:20:54,640
notices another Marine getting 
selected for Warrant Officer. 

451
00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:57,960
Suddenly the promotion that he 
celebrated becomes ordinary now 

452
00:20:57,960 --> 00:20:59,480
that he's chasing the next big 
thing. 

453
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:02,200
So he earns another promotion 
only to compare himself to 

454
00:21:02,200 --> 00:21:05,920
somebody who made major faster. 
He buys the truck he's always 

455
00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:08,120
wanted, and he notices somebody 
buying a newer truck. 

456
00:21:08,640 --> 00:21:10,280
And then he buys a house. 
And then he wishes it had 

457
00:21:10,280 --> 00:21:12,120
another bedroom. 
And so he spends his entire 

458
00:21:12,120 --> 00:21:14,520
career reaching goals that he 
once prayed for but never 

459
00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:15,920
actually enjoyed once they 
arrived. 

460
00:21:17,240 --> 00:21:19,400
Contentment always lives one 
achievement away. 

461
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:23,920
Have you ever noticed that just 
like King Midas, this guy would 

462
00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:26,320
discover that getting everything
you think you want doesn't cure 

463
00:21:26,320 --> 00:21:28,720
a heart that's convinced there's
always something better beyond 

464
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:30,520
reach? 
Envy. 

465
00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:33,000
So dangerous. 
Envy doesn't have the power to 

466
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,440
take away God's gifts from you. 
Praise God for that. 

467
00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:38,080
But it does convince you to stop
seeing them. 

468
00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:39,960
Trains your eyes to look at 
other things. 

469
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:41,640
I have a recommendation for you.
You know what? 

470
00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:45,120
It is not a book. 
I set you up for that. 

471
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:46,800
Thanks. 
It's a song. 

472
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:49,600
It's a song by my favorite band,
Switchfoot. 

473
00:21:50,640 --> 00:21:55,120
But 20 years ago, they wrote a 
song called Faust, Faust, Faust,

474
00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:58,160
Midas and myself. 
And the singer John Foreman, he 

475
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:01,520
describes this dream that he had
where he woke up and he's next 

476
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,400
to a beautiful woman. 
And it's not his wife. 

477
00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:05,560
And he's living this beautiful 
life. 

478
00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:07,040
And he looks at his skin and 
it's golden. 

479
00:22:07,040 --> 00:22:09,440
And I've just got an excerpt of 
lyrics I want you to hear, he 

480
00:22:09,440 --> 00:22:12,160
wrote. 
I looked outside the glass at 

481
00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:15,400
golden shores. 
Golden ships and masts with 

482
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:19,720
golden chords. 
As my reflection passed, I hated

483
00:22:19,720 --> 00:22:23,400
what I saw. 
My golden eyes were dead and a 

484
00:22:23,400 --> 00:22:26,080
thought passed through my head. 
A heart that's made of gold 

485
00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:32,040
can't really beat at all. 
Not everything that glitters is 

486
00:22:32,040 --> 00:22:34,120
gold, right? 
But also, not everything thrives

487
00:22:34,120 --> 00:22:36,840
when it's made of gold. 
So what do you do if you realize

488
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:38,560
that you become blind to your 
blessings? 

489
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:42,680
I don't think the answer is 
simply telling yourself stop 

490
00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:45,400
feeling that way. 
How many of y'all heard that 

491
00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:46,720
growing up? 
I'll give you something to whine

492
00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:49,000
about. 
Thanks, Mom. 

493
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:52,120
I'm full. 
How about you tell yourself 

494
00:22:52,120 --> 00:22:53,880
something like this? 
I shouldn't complain. 

495
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:55,240
Other people have it worse than 
I do. 

496
00:22:57,320 --> 00:22:59,760
While that's true, there's 
always somebody who's got it 

497
00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:01,680
worse. 
Have you ever noticed that 

498
00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:03,640
telling yourself that never 
produces gratitude? 

499
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:06,360
It never makes you feel more 
grateful. 

500
00:23:07,120 --> 00:23:10,680
It just produces guilt, which is
awful, because now you're 

501
00:23:10,680 --> 00:23:13,160
envious and you feel bad for 
being envious. 

502
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:14,880
Nothing's really changed for the
better. 

503
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:18,440
The answer is to retrain your 
attention, and you can do this. 

504
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,000
We just talked about the Bader 
Meinhof thing. 

505
00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:23,920
You have to determine that some 
things are more important than 

506
00:23:23,920 --> 00:23:25,080
the empty holes that you've been
looking at. 

507
00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:27,640
Can we go to the next slide? 
We need to retrain the way that 

508
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:30,240
we think. 
Remember how we started this 

509
00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:31,960
message with that whole 
phenomenon that your brain 

510
00:23:31,960 --> 00:23:34,280
starts to notice things when it 
believes they're important? 

511
00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:36,560
If that is true physically, I 
want you to know it's also true 

512
00:23:36,560 --> 00:23:38,680
spiritually. 
The more that you dwell on what 

513
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:41,760
you don't have, it's more 
evidence for your life to find 

514
00:23:41,760 --> 00:23:43,800
things that are missing. 
And the opposite is true. 

515
00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:46,680
When you intentionally begin to 
notice God's faithfulness and 

516
00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:50,080
His provision and his grace and 
his daily blessings, your 

517
00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:52,800
perspective will change. 
I promise you, because I walked 

518
00:23:52,800 --> 00:23:55,160
it out. 
And did I accomplish it in three

519
00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:55,720
weeks? 
No. 

520
00:23:55,720 --> 00:23:57,560
So don't come to me in 3 weeks 
and be like Pastor Blake, it 

521
00:23:57,560 --> 00:24:00,040
didn't even work. 
Come to me in 10 years and tell 

522
00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:01,480
me it didn't work. 
And when you do it, use that 

523
00:24:01,480 --> 00:24:02,520
stupid voice. 
I just did. 

524
00:24:05,640 --> 00:24:07,840
Here's what you do. 
The first thing, one of the 

525
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:10,320
healthiest spiritual disciplines
you can develop is the habit of 

526
00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,720
naming God's blessings before 
you name your burdens. 

527
00:24:13,360 --> 00:24:15,840
When we go to Him in a prayer, 
it's good to lay out your 

528
00:24:15,840 --> 00:24:18,640
burdens and ask Him to help you.
I'm not telling you not to do 

529
00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:21,200
that, but how about this? 
Before you start laying out all 

530
00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:23,520
the things that you wish were 
different, how about you spend 

531
00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:24,880
time thanking Him for what is 
true? 

532
00:24:26,280 --> 00:24:28,920
Thank Him for his salvation. 
I don't know. 

533
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:30,480
Thank Him for the fact you're 
not going to hell. 

534
00:24:30,480 --> 00:24:32,160
That's I'm pretty jazzed about 
that. 

535
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:35,640
Just personally, I was in 
Florida. 

536
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:38,600
It was already really hot, you 
know, so I'm sure I wouldn't 

537
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:42,120
thrive down there. 
Thank Him for His presence in 

538
00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:44,840
your life. 
Worship Him for who He is. 

539
00:24:44,840 --> 00:24:47,320
Thank Him for the people that He
placed in your life, especially 

540
00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:49,600
the ones you take for granted, 
the ones that you know aren't 

541
00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:50,920
going to leave. 
So you kind of treat Him like 

542
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:53,280
crap sometimes. 
Thank Him for them. 

543
00:24:54,640 --> 00:24:56,200
Thank Him for the prayers He's 
already answered. 

544
00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:57,800
Even if you've already thanked 
Him before. 

545
00:24:58,040 --> 00:25:00,480
Gratitude doesn't deny that 
there's still things you have to

546
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:03,160
pray for, but don't let them 
become bigger than the goodness 

547
00:25:03,160 --> 00:25:05,080
of God that you've already 
witnessed in your life. 

548
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:07,040
It will change the way that you 
think. 

549
00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:09,560
I promise you, you'll start 
noticing goodness a whole lot 

550
00:25:09,560 --> 00:25:11,040
more. 
This is why some people swear by

551
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:13,560
a gratitude journal. 
You could do that if you want 

552
00:25:13,560 --> 00:25:14,440
to. 
And some people, they're just 

553
00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:16,680
like, I'm not a journal. 
OK, well then say it out loud to

554
00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:18,120
God. 
Well, I'm not really a prayer. 

555
00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:20,640
That one. 
I can't help you with that one 

556
00:25:20,640 --> 00:25:26,120
needs to change #2 it's another 
step we don't really like a 

557
00:25:26,120 --> 00:25:27,600
whole lot. 
Sometimes we just need to reduce

558
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:29,520
the voices that constantly feed 
our comparison. 

559
00:25:30,320 --> 00:25:33,280
We're all addicted to something 
that's bad for us, and it might 

560
00:25:33,280 --> 00:25:35,720
be different in each of our 
lives, but we all are addicted 

561
00:25:35,720 --> 00:25:39,280
to something that's bad for us. 
If every day begins, the first 

562
00:25:39,280 --> 00:25:41,440
thing you do, your alarm goes 
off and because it's now on your

563
00:25:41,440 --> 00:25:44,000
phone, you turn it off and you 
immediately start scrolling and 

564
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:45,760
you start looking at those 
highlight reels I was talking 

565
00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:47,200
about. 
Don't be surprised when your own

566
00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:48,680
life starts looking 
disappointing. 

567
00:25:48,920 --> 00:25:51,760
That's how you started your day.
It's the first thing you put in 

568
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,840
your body. 
The first thing you took in was 

569
00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,840
somebody else's highlight reel. 
Think about it, how about if the

570
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:02,440
first thing you do is you end up
engaging in conversations of 

571
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:05,240
people that don't make you feel 
good about yourself? 

572
00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:08,040
You constantly seek out people 
that affirm that they're better 

573
00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,000
than you or that you need to be 
doing better. 

574
00:26:10,240 --> 00:26:14,080
You might need to edit some of 
your friendships, not just your 

575
00:26:14,080 --> 00:26:17,320
social media. 
Again, just just know this. 

576
00:26:18,280 --> 00:26:20,320
The issue is what's training 
your heart. 

577
00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:22,360
Your heart is going to notice 
certain things. 

578
00:26:22,360 --> 00:26:24,000
We need to be wise. 
The final thing that I would 

579
00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:25,720
just say on this before we move 
on is this. 

580
00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:28,840
And this becomes really hard if 
you're deep in envy, but it is 

581
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:31,560
so essential and it will break 
envy faster than the other 

582
00:26:31,560 --> 00:26:34,040
things I shared with you. 
Celebrate what God does in 

583
00:26:34,040 --> 00:26:36,600
someone's life before you 
understand what He's doing in 

584
00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:39,800
yours. 
I've been there, I've been 

585
00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:40,640
there. 
I've been in the middle of a 

586
00:26:40,640 --> 00:26:42,680
really bad breakup and thought, 
well, it'd be easier for me to 

587
00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:44,400
celebrate with them if my heart 
wasn't broken. 

588
00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:47,600
I know it'd be easy if my heart 
wasn't broken, but it doesn't 

589
00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:49,040
mean it's wrong to celebrate it 
now. 

590
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:51,440
Well, it'd be easy for me to 
celebrate that promotion if I 

591
00:26:51,440 --> 00:26:54,160
felt like my job, you know, 
worked out if my boss understood

592
00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:55,440
me or whatever. 
Guess what? 

593
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:59,800
Bosses never understand you. 
They don't, you know why? 

594
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:03,080
They got their own issues. 
But it's OK. 

595
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:04,960
I'm sure you fully understand 
your boss and have a lot of 

596
00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:08,920
grace for them. 
All right, that one went over 

597
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:12,400
great. 
So if you can start celebrating 

598
00:27:12,400 --> 00:27:14,760
the goodness of God in somebody 
else's life, do you know what 

599
00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:17,680
you're celebrating? 
The goodness of God. 

600
00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:21,600
You're celebrating the goodness 
of God and you're like, yeah, 

601
00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:25,400
but it's not in my life, 
sweetheart, ain't about you. 

602
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:31,600
Celebrate the goodness of God 
anywhere you see it in the life 

603
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:33,720
of your friend, in the life of 
your family member, in your 

604
00:27:33,720 --> 00:27:36,080
life, in the life of people you 
don't like. 

605
00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,760
Let God shake it out. 
God is the one who handles 

606
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:40,560
justice and vengeance and all of
that. 

607
00:27:40,560 --> 00:27:45,000
Your job, your job is to love 
God and do what he says. 

608
00:27:45,760 --> 00:27:48,360
Why would you ever be mad at God
being good to somebody? 

609
00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:52,440
Should you be jealous because of
his kindness? 

610
00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:56,680
The other thing that envy does, 
And this makes us isolated, 

611
00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:58,000
which makes us compare all the 
more. 

612
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,520
Envy turns your relationships 
into competitions. 

613
00:28:02,240 --> 00:28:04,240
One of the saddest things about 
Rachel and Leah is that they 

614
00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:05,320
should have been on the same 
page. 

615
00:28:05,320 --> 00:28:07,920
They were sisters. 
They had shared experiences, 

616
00:28:07,920 --> 00:28:10,600
shared struggles, a shared 
family in a little bit of a 

617
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:13,360
weird way. 
But envy slowly changed the way 

618
00:28:13,360 --> 00:28:15,600
that they looked at each other. 
They should have been each 

619
00:28:15,600 --> 00:28:17,520
other's biggest fan, biggest 
support. 

620
00:28:17,960 --> 00:28:21,840
Sisters are meant to support one
another, but instead of seeing 

621
00:28:21,840 --> 00:28:23,960
someone to love, they saw 
someone to measure themselves 

622
00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:25,960
against. 
Someone that they felt less than

623
00:28:26,160 --> 00:28:27,920
but they hoped to feel greater 
than. 

624
00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:31,560
They dehumanized their sister 
into a tool to feel better about

625
00:28:31,560 --> 00:28:35,000
themselves. 
It's gross. 

626
00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:38,960
Every child that Leah had became
another reminder of what Rachel 

627
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:40,920
lacked, and every ounce of 
affection that Jacob showed 

628
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:43,440
Rachel became another reminder 
of what Leah longed for. 

629
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:46,720
They weren't simply living 
alongside one another, they were

630
00:28:46,720 --> 00:28:49,600
competing with one another. 
It's awful, but that's what envy

631
00:28:49,600 --> 00:28:52,200
always does. 
It robs you of your contentment 

632
00:28:52,200 --> 00:28:54,320
and it changes the way that you 
see people. 

633
00:28:54,840 --> 00:28:57,760
Someone who should have become a
friend becomes a competition 

634
00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:00,560
because now you're afraid they 
don't have your best interest at

635
00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:02,080
heart, so why would you open up 
to them? 

636
00:29:02,280 --> 00:29:04,040
Maybe you'll open up to them 
when you've got more to offer 

637
00:29:04,040 --> 00:29:05,760
them. 
One time I heard somebody tell a

638
00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:09,120
story where they said they said 
I could be a friend, but I'd be 

639
00:29:09,120 --> 00:29:13,320
more of a mentor friend to them.
Oh, so you could just delete the

640
00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:14,640
word friend out of that 
sentence? 

641
00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:17,440
I'd like to have a one way 
friendship please. 

642
00:29:20,640 --> 00:29:22,240
We've all been in one of those 
before though, haven't we? 

643
00:29:24,520 --> 00:29:26,680
What's heartbreaking about this 
is it doesn't stop outside the 

644
00:29:26,680 --> 00:29:28,840
walls of the church. 
If anything, it becomes so 

645
00:29:28,840 --> 00:29:31,160
subtle inside of the church. 
That's why it's in this series. 

646
00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:33,200
And let me tell you why. 
We have learned to hide it 

647
00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:35,160
better than the world. 
In the world, they call it 

648
00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:36,760
ambition. 
They talk about chasing your 

649
00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:39,120
goals and getting it done and 
working harder than anybody 

650
00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:40,680
else. 
Here in the church, we just 

651
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:43,440
smile, and when somebody shares 
good news, we're smiling at 

652
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:44,840
them. 
But inwardly we're wondering why

653
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:46,600
God hasn't done the same thing 
for us. 

654
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:50,080
Scripture tells us to rejoice 
with those that rejoice and to 

655
00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:53,520
mourn with those that mourn. 
And the truth is, when we're at 

656
00:29:53,520 --> 00:29:56,040
our least healthy, when 
somebody's mourning, we're on 

657
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:58,160
the inside thinking, well, thank
God, that's not me. 

658
00:29:58,960 --> 00:30:02,440
And when somebody's rejoicing, 
we say, why can't that be me? 

659
00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:07,240
How about we applaud when 
someone is recognized, but we 

660
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,800
also wish that our faithfulness 
would get noticed instead of 

661
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,440
theirs. 
We hear somebody's testimony. 

662
00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:15,080
Instead of rejoicing in God's 
grace, we're asking why our 

663
00:30:15,080 --> 00:30:16,480
story doesn't look like theirs 
yet. 

664
00:30:16,480 --> 00:30:18,800
And envy doesn't make you angry 
with people. 

665
00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:21,920
It just makes it impossible to 
genuinely celebrate them. 

666
00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:24,120
I'm going to read you these 
three scriptures that are up 

667
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:27,320
here on the screen from three of
the gospels, just to show you 

668
00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:30,240
what knuckleheads the disciples 
were so that you don't feel bad 

669
00:30:30,240 --> 00:30:31,480
about what a knucklehead you've 
been. 

670
00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:34,080
All right? 
Because it brings me a lot of 

671
00:30:34,080 --> 00:30:37,320
hope to read these stories to 
mark Chapter 9, starting in 

672
00:30:37,320 --> 00:30:41,400
verse 33. 
After they arrived in Capernaum 

673
00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:44,480
and settled in a house, Jesus 
asked his disciples, what were 

674
00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:47,280
you discussing out on the road? 
I can only picture this. 

675
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:49,560
There are times that my kids, I 
hear just a piece of a 

676
00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:50,840
conversation. 
I'm like, what are you talking 

677
00:30:50,840 --> 00:30:54,680
about? 
Sometimes it's we worked it out.

678
00:30:56,160 --> 00:30:59,600
Don't want to tell me. 
Right, OK, Jesus says, what are 

679
00:30:59,600 --> 00:31:02,120
you all talking about? 
Oh, could you imagine if he just

680
00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:04,080
popped out of heaven? 
You seen those memes where he's 

681
00:31:04,080 --> 00:31:05,120
like, I saw that. 
Could you imagine? 

682
00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:06,760
He just popped out of heaven? 
Sometimes he was like, hey 

683
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:08,240
Heather, what were you all 
talking about? 

684
00:31:11,360 --> 00:31:13,720
How your goodness endures 
forever. 

685
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:20,320
Well, this is where we find them
because listen to this verse 34.

686
00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:22,880
They didn't answer because they 
had been arguing over which of 

687
00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:28,040
them was the greatest. 
He sat down, called the 12 

688
00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,040
disciples over to him. 
And this is the famous scene. 

689
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:32,720
This is the this is the backdrop
to when this happens. 

690
00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:36,040
While these grown men that he 
has handpicked to serve 

691
00:31:36,040 --> 00:31:38,760
alongside him are arguing over 
who's better than who. 

692
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:40,520
Anything you can do, I can do 
better. 

693
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:47,920
He sits them down and he calls 
over a little child and he put 

694
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:50,400
this little child among them, 
takes the child in his arms and 

695
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:52,920
he says to them in verse 37, 
anyone who welcomes the little 

696
00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:55,480
child like this on my behalf 
welcomes me. 

697
00:31:56,200 --> 00:32:00,040
Well done Jake. 
And anyone who welcomes me 

698
00:32:00,040 --> 00:32:05,760
welcomes not only me, but my 
father who sent me hoping that 

699
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:09,080
they'd get that lesson. 
I'm sure they did there anyway. 

700
00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:12,200
This is the first real glimpse, 
if you think about it, that we 

701
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:14,440
actually get to see into the 
disciples hearts. 

702
00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:17,360
They're walking with Jesus, 
they're listening to his 

703
00:32:17,360 --> 00:32:19,880
teaching, they're watching 
miracles unfold, their church 

704
00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:22,160
folk. 
And somewhere along the road, 

705
00:32:22,160 --> 00:32:24,440
they start arguing over which 
one of them is the greatest. 

706
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:27,720
And Jesus asked them what 
they're discussing, and they 

707
00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:29,160
can't even answer him. 
They're embarrassed. 

708
00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:31,280
Their silence is probably louder
than what they would have said 

709
00:32:31,280 --> 00:32:34,400
anyway. 
Jesus addresses the issue. 

710
00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:36,720
He teaches them that greatness 
in the Kingdom looks like 

711
00:32:36,720 --> 00:32:39,880
humility and service. 
And the lesson still doesn't 

712
00:32:39,880 --> 00:32:42,040
take root in their lives. 
Check this out, Matthew chapter 

713
00:32:42,040 --> 00:32:45,160
20. 
They're trying a different 

714
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:46,920
tactic now. 
And bring in Mama. 

715
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:51,400
Then the mother of James and 
John, the sons of Zebedee, came 

716
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:54,720
to Jesus with her sons. 
She knelt respectfully to ask a 

717
00:32:54,720 --> 00:32:57,160
favor. 
What is your request? 

718
00:32:57,160 --> 00:33:01,080
He asked and she replied, in 
your Kingdom, please let my two 

719
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:04,200
sons sit in the places of honor 
next to you, one on your right 

720
00:33:04,200 --> 00:33:06,840
hand and others on your left or 
the other one on your left. 

721
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:10,640
And Jesus answered by saying to 
them, you don't know what you're

722
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:13,120
asking. 
He says, are you able to drink 

723
00:33:13,120 --> 00:33:14,320
from the bitter cup of 
suffering? 

724
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,600
I'm about to drink. 
And they say, Oh yes, we are 

725
00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:21,600
able. 
I don't even know how I'd answer

726
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,240
God if he asked me that. 
Can you drink this cup of 

727
00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:28,920
suffering? 
OK, I'm not thirsty anymore. 

728
00:33:28,920 --> 00:33:34,200
Lord Jesus told them, You will 
indeed drink from my bitter cup,

729
00:33:34,720 --> 00:33:36,800
but I have no right to say to 
you who will sit on my right or 

730
00:33:36,800 --> 00:33:38,120
my left? 
The Father's prepared those 

731
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:41,040
places for the ones he's chosen.
But check this out. 

732
00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:43,080
What did I just tell you about 
relationships? 

733
00:33:44,240 --> 00:33:46,680
When the other 10 disciples 
heard what James and John had 

734
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:50,920
asked, they were indignant. 
That's a fancy word for real 

735
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:53,680
Mad. 
And Jesus called them together 

736
00:33:53,680 --> 00:33:56,160
and he said, you know that the 
rulers of this world, Lord 

737
00:33:56,200 --> 00:33:59,160
lorded over their people and 
officials flaunt their authority

738
00:33:59,160 --> 00:34:02,320
over those under them. 
But among you it will be 

739
00:34:02,320 --> 00:34:04,040
different. 
He didn't even say it should be 

740
00:34:04,040 --> 00:34:06,560
different. 
He said, check this out guys, it

741
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:12,040
will be different for you. 
Whoever wants to be a leader 

742
00:34:12,040 --> 00:34:15,400
among you must be your servant, 
and whoever wants to be the 

743
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:17,560
first among you must become your
slave. 

744
00:34:18,080 --> 00:34:20,840
For even the Son of man came not
to be served, but to serve 

745
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:22,920
others and to give his life as a
ransom for many. 

746
00:34:23,800 --> 00:34:24,920
Well, I should put it to bed, 
right? 

747
00:34:26,639 --> 00:34:30,239
Sometime later after that first 
story, they send their mom. 

748
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:32,600
How dirty is that? 
You want to know my personal 

749
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:33,880
theory? 
I'm a step away from the Pulva 

750
00:34:33,880 --> 00:34:37,000
for this. 
OK, Jesus, first public miracle.

751
00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,159
It's when his mom says, hey, 
they're running out of wine. 

752
00:34:39,159 --> 00:34:42,040
You need to turn this into wine.
I bet you I really feel like 

753
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:44,199
they were like he's got soft 
spot for moms. 

754
00:34:46,800 --> 00:34:49,199
James, go get mom. 
We're going to, we're going to 

755
00:34:49,199 --> 00:34:51,639
try this a different way. 
They're going to say, was she 

756
00:34:51,639 --> 00:34:54,120
going to say no to an old woman?
He did. 

757
00:34:54,560 --> 00:34:58,240
So all right, let's go to the 
Gospel of Luke, chapter 22. 

758
00:34:59,120 --> 00:35:02,000
We're now at the Last Supper. 
I mean, the story's almost over.

759
00:35:03,240 --> 00:35:06,960
And then they began to argue 
among themselves about who would

760
00:35:06,960 --> 00:35:10,960
be the greatest among them. 
Their time with him is almost 

761
00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:12,920
done. 
Jesus is trying to get across 

762
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:15,240
something really important to 
them, and they can't see past 

763
00:35:15,240 --> 00:35:20,360
themselves. 
Jesus told them in this world 

764
00:35:20,360 --> 00:35:23,280
the kings and great men lorded 
over their people, yet they are 

765
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:27,040
called friends of the people. 
But among you, here it is again.

766
00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:31,680
It will be different. 
Those who are greatest among you

767
00:35:31,680 --> 00:35:34,240
should take the lowest rank, and
the leader should be like a 

768
00:35:34,240 --> 00:35:38,040
servant says who's more 
important, the one who sits at 

769
00:35:38,040 --> 00:35:41,320
the table or the one who serves?
The one who sits at the table, 

770
00:35:41,320 --> 00:35:47,360
of course, but not here, for I 
am among you is one who serves. 

771
00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:48,760
In other words, you know what he
said? 

772
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:52,560
He said I'm here as a servant. 
Tell me if you think you're 

773
00:35:52,560 --> 00:35:56,760
greater than me. 
And I bet they got a real quiet 

774
00:35:56,760 --> 00:36:00,680
moment once again. 
Who's going to say I'd like that

775
00:36:00,680 --> 00:36:02,600
spot? 
Jesus, could I sit at the head 

776
00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:06,560
of the table? 
Jesus is sharing his final meal 

777
00:36:06,560 --> 00:36:08,440
with the disciples. 
It's the Passover meal. 

778
00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:10,200
He's talking about the blood of 
the covenant. 

779
00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:12,560
He's talking about this new 
covenant that God is writing in 

780
00:36:12,560 --> 00:36:14,600
his blood. 
And within hours Jesus is going 

781
00:36:14,600 --> 00:36:16,720
to be arrested and beaten and 
crucified. 

782
00:36:17,800 --> 00:36:21,600
The shadow of the cross is 
looming over this room and they 

783
00:36:21,600 --> 00:36:24,320
can't notice it because what are
the disciples discussing? 

784
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:28,880
Who should be considered the 
greatest amongst the brothers 

785
00:36:28,880 --> 00:36:33,000
that they have? 
It's disgusting, and I tell you 

786
00:36:33,000 --> 00:36:34,760
this with all the love in my 
heart, because I struggle with 

787
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:37,400
it just like anybody else. 
It's just as disgusting in our 

788
00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:40,120
lives. 
That should both comfort and 

789
00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:41,720
convict us because it comforts 
us. 

790
00:36:41,720 --> 00:36:43,800
Even though we know the 
disciples wrestled with 

791
00:36:43,800 --> 00:36:46,080
comparison. 
We're disciples who wrestle with

792
00:36:46,080 --> 00:36:47,560
it. 
But it should convict us because

793
00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:50,160
if men who physically walked 
with Jesus could struggle with 

794
00:36:50,160 --> 00:36:54,840
envy, none of us is above it. 
I honestly believe this is one 

795
00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:56,360
of the open secrets of the 
modern church. 

796
00:36:56,360 --> 00:36:58,520
We don't say it out loud because
we've learned to disguise it 

797
00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:01,840
with those polite smiles. 
But envy damages relationships. 

798
00:37:02,040 --> 00:37:05,240
Every single Sunday, someone 
else gets asked to lead a 

799
00:37:05,240 --> 00:37:08,040
ministry and instead of 
celebrating, start wondering why

800
00:37:08,040 --> 00:37:10,120
we weren't picked. 
Or somebody shares a testimony 

801
00:37:10,120 --> 00:37:11,360
about what God has done in their
family. 

802
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:13,760
And then we're just like, well, 
I'll rejoice with you when my 

803
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:16,080
prayers get answered. 
I've even watched churches fall 

804
00:37:16,080 --> 00:37:18,880
into this trap. 
It's been about five years now 

805
00:37:18,880 --> 00:37:21,320
since Pastor Tom retired. 
Not crazy for those of you that 

806
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:25,400
were here, churches started 
comparing attendance and budgets

807
00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:26,920
and buildings and stuff like 
that. 

808
00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:29,880
When I became the lead pastor 
here, I reached out to more than

809
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:33,000
two dozen churches in the local 
area because I genuinely wanted 

810
00:37:33,000 --> 00:37:34,520
relationships with other 
pastors. 

811
00:37:34,880 --> 00:37:37,160
I wanted to know areas that they
were strong and they could help 

812
00:37:37,160 --> 00:37:39,240
support me and I wanted them to 
know what we're all about. 

813
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:42,080
And out of those two dozen 
churches that I reached out to, 

814
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:46,240
only 5 responded with a yes. 
And that broke my heart. 

815
00:37:46,240 --> 00:37:48,240
Because the Kingdom of God is 
not meant to function like 

816
00:37:48,240 --> 00:37:50,120
competing businesses. 
Liberty Church is not a 

817
00:37:50,120 --> 00:37:54,240
franchise. 
We're not trying to protect our 

818
00:37:54,240 --> 00:37:56,280
market share. 
The number one reason why most 

819
00:37:56,280 --> 00:37:58,160
churches don't work together is 
'cause they're afraid of losing 

820
00:37:58,160 --> 00:38:01,520
people to another church. 
How can you lose something that 

821
00:38:01,520 --> 00:38:05,880
doesn't belong to you? 
If another church is faithfully 

822
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:08,200
preaching Christ and reaching 
people, that's not our loss. 

823
00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:10,840
It's a Kingdom victory. 
And I'll just tell you this, if 

824
00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:12,640
you're ever here and you're just
like, well, I feel guilty about 

825
00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:15,080
leaving, but you feel like you 
can be more effective in another

826
00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:17,400
church, I'll help you there. 
That's not me. 

827
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:19,720
Like, let me show you the door, 
you know, don't let the door hit

828
00:38:19,720 --> 00:38:22,200
you on your backside. 
No, I want you to thrive. 

829
00:38:23,480 --> 00:38:25,440
I want you to thrive. 
And this, if there's an area you

830
00:38:25,440 --> 00:38:27,320
think you can serve here, come 
and talk to me about it. 

831
00:38:27,360 --> 00:38:29,720
I can't guarantee you a green 
light, but talk to me about it. 

832
00:38:30,440 --> 00:38:33,800
Let's figure it out. 
I'll just tell you this, envy 

833
00:38:33,800 --> 00:38:35,520
will always ask you where do I 
rank? 

834
00:38:36,280 --> 00:38:38,400
And Jesus would ask you 
something different. 

835
00:38:38,400 --> 00:38:40,360
He would ask you who are you 
serving? 

836
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:44,280
They're 2 completely different 
questions because one of them 

837
00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:46,360
builds competitors and the other
builds disciples. 

838
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:48,000
And I'm going to go with Jesus 
question. 

839
00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:50,680
I'll just tell you this real 
quick. 

840
00:38:50,680 --> 00:38:54,200
Another one of the stories of 
envy from history comes from 2 

841
00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:56,200
composers. 
How many of you are big fans of 

842
00:38:56,720 --> 00:39:02,400
Antonio Salieri? 
Why are you laughing at Antonio?

843
00:39:04,000 --> 00:39:06,680
Does anybody know that name? 
You do. 

844
00:39:07,680 --> 00:39:09,000
I'll give you a sticker after 
service. 

845
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:11,040
You want a sticker? 
2 stickers. 

846
00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:12,040
Three stickers today. 
OK. 

847
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:17,520
He was a competitor with 
somebody that you probably also 

848
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:23,360
haven't heard of named Mozart. 
History kind of debates how much

849
00:39:23,360 --> 00:39:26,120
of this is true, right? 
But they had this competition. 

850
00:39:26,120 --> 00:39:28,440
And Sally Erie wasn't a failed 
musician. 

851
00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:30,840
He wasn't untalented. 
He he actually was one of the 

852
00:39:30,840 --> 00:39:33,160
most respected composers and 
musicians of the day. 

853
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:36,400
Students admired him. 
He had a career most musicians 

854
00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:39,160
could only dream about. 
Kings sought out his work to be 

855
00:39:39,160 --> 00:39:40,880
performed. 
And then Mozart came along. 

856
00:39:40,880 --> 00:39:43,840
And instead of allowing Mozart's
brilliance to inspire him, 

857
00:39:44,400 --> 00:39:48,320
legend has it that envy consumed
him and another man's gift 

858
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:50,640
became the lens through which he
looked at his own gifts. 

859
00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:54,240
So music stopped being something
to create, and it became 

860
00:39:54,240 --> 00:39:58,320
something to compete over. 
The tragedy isn't that Mozart 

861
00:39:58,320 --> 00:40:00,960
was gifted, of course. 
The tragedy is that Salieri 

862
00:40:00,960 --> 00:40:03,480
became unable to enjoy his own 
gifts because he couldn't stop 

863
00:40:03,480 --> 00:40:04,880
looking at somebody else's 
gifts. 

864
00:40:05,960 --> 00:40:07,560
I wonder what would have 
happened if the two of them 

865
00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:09,360
could have put their heads 
together and created some music 

866
00:40:09,360 --> 00:40:13,520
together, right? 
Think about that for the church.

867
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:16,040
What could the church do if we 
started looking at other 

868
00:40:16,040 --> 00:40:19,960
people's gifts and realized 
we're better if we put our gifts

869
00:40:20,040 --> 00:40:22,240
together? 
So. 

870
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:25,280
Let me just say this, how do we 
retrain our relationships? 

871
00:40:25,280 --> 00:40:27,640
It's one thing to retrain what 
we focus on and our attention. 

872
00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,480
If your relationships have 
become split, how do you retrain

873
00:40:30,480 --> 00:40:33,880
them? 
The answer isn't to do more. 

874
00:40:33,880 --> 00:40:36,400
I want you to know that. 
The answer is just to relate 

875
00:40:36,400 --> 00:40:38,840
differently to people. 
And I say this because a lot of 

876
00:40:38,840 --> 00:40:40,880
times when I talk about building
up your relationships, people 

877
00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:43,600
are like, oh man, now I have to 
work in more coffee visits and 

878
00:40:43,760 --> 00:40:45,800
now I have to do more. 
No, not necessarily. 

879
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:47,320
Maybe, but that's between you 
and the Lord. 

880
00:40:47,840 --> 00:40:51,400
Listen to this. 
I think it starts by 

881
00:40:51,400 --> 00:40:54,200
intentionally moving people out 
of that comparison category and 

882
00:40:54,200 --> 00:40:56,040
put them back into the category 
of relationship. 

883
00:40:56,040 --> 00:40:57,440
This is a human being I care 
about. 

884
00:40:57,440 --> 00:40:59,200
This is not somebody who's a 
thorn in my flesh. 

885
00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:02,440
And that starts. 
That sounds easy, but it's 

886
00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:05,520
pretty hard because our culture 
encourages us to evaluate almost

887
00:41:05,520 --> 00:41:07,360
everyone. 
I see it all the time now. 

888
00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:09,560
Don't tell people your dreams 
because they're not all cheering

889
00:41:09,560 --> 00:41:11,320
for you. 
Tell them your dreams. 

890
00:41:11,560 --> 00:41:14,400
If God put those dreams inside 
of you, then when it comes to 

891
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:16,080
fruition He'll get the glory for
it. 

892
00:41:16,840 --> 00:41:18,640
Don't wait until your dreams are
achieved and be like, well God 

893
00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:20,120
told me 20 years ago that would 
happen. 

894
00:41:20,240 --> 00:41:23,720
I bet he did. 
But you just waited 2 decades to

895
00:41:23,720 --> 00:41:25,800
tell me. 
Here's what you do. 

896
00:41:25,840 --> 00:41:27,880
For the first thing and I'm 
really big on this term but 

897
00:41:27,880 --> 00:41:30,320
become curious instead of 
comparative. 

898
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:32,960
I really want to break this down
for you all for relationships. 

899
00:41:33,240 --> 00:41:36,040
Instead of looking at another 
couple and thinking I wish my 

900
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:39,000
marriage looked like theirs, why
don't you ask him to dinner? 

901
00:41:40,200 --> 00:41:42,360
Why don't you ask him to dinner 
and then learn from them. 

902
00:41:42,720 --> 00:41:44,480
You're like, well, then I have 
to tell them that there's things

903
00:41:44,480 --> 00:41:46,880
on my marriage that aren't good.
Really. 

904
00:41:47,520 --> 00:41:49,600
I bet it'll be the first time 
that they assume that. 

905
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:55,560
Instead of envying somebody's 
financial wisdom, invite them to

906
00:41:55,560 --> 00:41:57,520
coffee and say, how did you get 
where you are? 

907
00:41:58,240 --> 00:41:59,840
I can't even spell the word 
budget. 

908
00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:02,440
Talk to them and be honest about
it. 

909
00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:05,000
Instead of resenting somebody's 
leadership, ask them if they'll 

910
00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:07,720
mentor you or ask them to just 
at least give you tips. 

911
00:42:07,720 --> 00:42:09,240
What have you learned from 
leadership? 

912
00:42:09,600 --> 00:42:11,800
Envy keeps people at a distance 
and you know why? 

913
00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:15,040
Because people at a distance 
makes comparison easy. 

914
00:42:15,240 --> 00:42:17,080
People that are close that you 
relate to. 

915
00:42:17,320 --> 00:42:19,720
It's hard to envy somebody that 
you genuinely love and care 

916
00:42:19,720 --> 00:42:21,680
about. 
It's very difficult. 

917
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:24,960
Keep them close. 
You know that saying where 

918
00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:26,520
they're like, you know, keep 
your friends close, but your 

919
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:28,200
enemies closer. 
That's stupid. 

920
00:42:28,200 --> 00:42:30,480
Don't do that. 
Friends closer. 

921
00:42:31,000 --> 00:42:34,320
OK, genuine friends, because at 
that point, now you've got your 

922
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:37,080
own support system. 
The problem is many of us have 

923
00:42:37,080 --> 00:42:39,000
our enemies closer because we're
on guard. 

924
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:41,400
We're worried about what they're
doing, and we're focused more on

925
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:44,120
our enemies than our friends 
because our enemies are closer 

926
00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:47,800
than our friends. 
I'm using words like this a lot 

927
00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:49,440
today, but I'm in a mood. 
It's stupid. 

928
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:53,080
Stop doing it. 
For some people, it also means 

929
00:42:53,080 --> 00:42:55,360
to change your conversations. 
I just talked about sometimes 

930
00:42:55,360 --> 00:42:57,480
you have to prune those 
conversations that you've got 

931
00:42:57,480 --> 00:42:59,200
because these people are not 
contributing well. 

932
00:42:59,960 --> 00:43:01,120
Well, I'm not talking about them
anymore. 

933
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:05,080
I'm talking about you and me. 
If you know that when you're in 

934
00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:08,320
a mood, you go to someone so 
that you can have an envious 

935
00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:12,720
conversation, you know what you 
contribute, stop it. 

936
00:43:13,640 --> 00:43:15,680
Stop doing it. 
Stop contributing to the one 

937
00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:17,400
thing that is dragging your life
down. 

938
00:43:18,920 --> 00:43:20,440
And I think especially important
in the church. 

939
00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:22,920
I just touched on this is in the
church, we all have different 

940
00:43:22,920 --> 00:43:25,360
gifts because God does not 
expect any one of us to do it 

941
00:43:25,360 --> 00:43:28,120
all. 
And a lot of times, let's say 

942
00:43:28,120 --> 00:43:30,520
you've got a gift of evangelism,
you're really great at reaching 

943
00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:32,560
the loss, but you've got 
somebody who's got a pastoral 

944
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:34,320
gift and they're great at 
helping somebody learn the 

945
00:43:34,320 --> 00:43:38,320
Bible, but they're too shy to 
really get out there and do the 

946
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:40,600
hard work of an evangelist. 
We're all called to do it in 

947
00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:42,760
some way. 
But how about instead of like 

948
00:43:42,920 --> 00:43:44,640
they always want to do these 
outreach things? 

949
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:46,520
You know, I, I like church 
programs. 

950
00:43:46,840 --> 00:43:49,160
Meanwhile, they're like, church 
programs are a waste of my time.

951
00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:51,600
There's people that are going to
hell that are over a Big Apple 

952
00:43:51,600 --> 00:43:53,040
right now and I need to go get 
them. 

953
00:43:55,560 --> 00:43:57,960
Crazy idea, right? 
Could you imagine if you were 

954
00:43:57,960 --> 00:44:01,040
like, what do you need to be 
equipped so you can go get them?

955
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:04,120
And here's what I need so I can 
help them know the Lord better 

956
00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:06,840
when they get here. 
Could you imagine what would 

957
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:10,400
happen if we learned our gift, 
took it seriously so that we 

958
00:44:10,400 --> 00:44:12,600
could work in conjunction with 
other gifts? 

959
00:44:13,080 --> 00:44:15,040
Oh man, the church would look 
completely different. 

960
00:44:15,600 --> 00:44:17,520
How many of y'all know somebody 
who says they won't go to church

961
00:44:17,520 --> 00:44:19,720
because it's full of hypocrites 
that don't get along? 

962
00:44:21,680 --> 00:44:26,480
Well, they're right, but we're 
trying and that's the difference

963
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:28,680
on the outside world versus the 
church. 

964
00:44:30,480 --> 00:44:31,920
We'll wrap it up. 
But as I come to the end of 

965
00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:34,240
this, I just, I want you to know
that first of all, next week 

966
00:44:34,240 --> 00:44:35,520
we're going to talk about 
bitterness. 

967
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:38,600
A lot of us, we hold on to 
bitterness because it's not good

968
00:44:38,600 --> 00:44:41,880
to speak. 
I'll, but as we come to the end 

969
00:44:41,880 --> 00:44:43,360
of this, we're going to be in 
Philippians 4. 

970
00:44:43,360 --> 00:44:46,280
I have one last scripture to 
share with you and I just want 

971
00:44:46,280 --> 00:44:48,760
you to know it's interesting 
because Paul uses one particular

972
00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:52,920
word in Philippians 4 and I want
this to be the word that you 

973
00:44:52,920 --> 00:44:55,880
notice above all the other words
when you read the scripture from

974
00:44:55,880 --> 00:44:58,480
now on. 
And the word is this learned, 

975
00:44:59,560 --> 00:45:01,320
Learned. 
Here's this well known 

976
00:45:01,320 --> 00:45:04,000
scripture. 
Paul says this to the church in 

977
00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:07,000
Philippi. 
Not that I was ever in need for 

978
00:45:07,000 --> 00:45:11,560
I have learned how to be content
with whatever I have. 

979
00:45:12,760 --> 00:45:16,480
I know how to live on almost 
nothing or with everything he 

980
00:45:16,480 --> 00:45:19,960
says I have. 
Here it is learned the secret of

981
00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:23,360
living in every situation, 
whether it's with a full stomach

982
00:45:23,480 --> 00:45:27,400
or empty, with plenty or little 
for I can do everything through 

983
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:30,280
Christ who gives me strength. 
One of my favorite hoodies says 

984
00:45:30,280 --> 00:45:32,440
I could do all things through a 
scripture taken out of context. 

985
00:45:32,800 --> 00:45:35,080
I just I don't wear it to church
events because I'm afraid that 

986
00:45:35,080 --> 00:45:36,640
somebody's going to take a 
picture and be like, look at 

987
00:45:36,640 --> 00:45:40,000
this hypocrite pastor. 
But I wear it at the house and I

988
00:45:40,000 --> 00:45:41,400
pull my hood up when I need to 
be alone. 

989
00:45:42,880 --> 00:45:45,200
Listen to this. 
This, this word learned is the 

990
00:45:45,200 --> 00:45:48,560
key to everything that we've 
talked about today because envy 

991
00:45:48,680 --> 00:45:50,560
has a lesson that it's trying to
teach you. 

992
00:45:51,520 --> 00:45:55,320
Envy whispers to you, You'll be 
content when and you can fill in

993
00:45:55,320 --> 00:45:57,880
the blank from there. 
You'll be content when you 

994
00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:00,240
finally get married. 
You'll be content when you have 

995
00:46:00,240 --> 00:46:01,600
a House of your own and you're 
not renting. 

996
00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:03,040
You'll be content when you have 
kids. 

997
00:46:03,360 --> 00:46:04,840
You'll be content when you get a
promotion. 

998
00:46:04,840 --> 00:46:06,040
You'll be content when this 
grows. 

999
00:46:06,040 --> 00:46:07,920
You'll be content when dot, dot 
dot. 

1000
00:46:11,800 --> 00:46:13,560
The problem is the finish line 
doesn't stay there. 

1001
00:46:13,560 --> 00:46:15,640
So I want you to think about in 
these terms. 

1002
00:46:15,640 --> 00:46:20,160
Yesterday's prayer becomes 
today's expectation, and before 

1003
00:46:20,160 --> 00:46:22,320
long, today's expectation 
becomes tomorrow's 

1004
00:46:22,320 --> 00:46:25,240
disappointment. 
It's no wonder so many of us 

1005
00:46:25,240 --> 00:46:26,960
don't even enjoy life as we go 
through it. 

1006
00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:31,320
What did Paul say? 
He he learned. 

1007
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:33,560
Why is that the word I want you 
to remember? 

1008
00:46:33,880 --> 00:46:37,200
Because if you struggle with 
this, you can learn, too. 

1009
00:46:38,320 --> 00:46:41,600
Paul's a brilliant man. 
The secret wasn't pretending 

1010
00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:43,600
that he had no desires. 
He had desires. 

1011
00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:45,840
I promise you that. 
You know where he wrote the book

1012
00:46:46,280 --> 00:46:51,080
of Philippians from prison and 
he said, I've learned the secret

1013
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:53,720
to contentment. 
I bet you he had some desires. 

1014
00:46:55,560 --> 00:46:57,840
He had known seasons of 
abundance and he had known 

1015
00:46:57,840 --> 00:47:01,640
seasons of need. 
But he learned that his joy and 

1016
00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:04,320
his contentment didn't come from
his circumstances. 

1017
00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:08,600
It came from Christ Himself, and
no matter where you are, nothing

1018
00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:10,920
can separate you from the love 
of Christ. 

1019
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:14,200
I don't even think the opposite 
of envy is gratitude, although 

1020
00:47:14,200 --> 00:47:15,960
gratitude is certainly part of 
the answer. 

1021
00:47:17,000 --> 00:47:19,240
I just want you to know this. 
Gratitude thanks God for what 

1022
00:47:19,240 --> 00:47:21,800
He's given, but contentment? 
I want you to hear this. 

1023
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:24,360
Contentment goes one step 
further and trusts God with what

1024
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:28,880
He has not given you. 
Gratitude is when you're 

1025
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:30,080
grateful for what He's given 
you. 

1026
00:47:30,120 --> 00:47:32,840
Contentment is when you're 
grateful for what He has not 

1027
00:47:32,840 --> 00:47:35,200
provided, or at least not 
provided yet. 

1028
00:47:36,480 --> 00:47:39,000
Gratitude says thank you for 
these blessings and contentment 

1029
00:47:39,000 --> 00:47:40,680
would say. 
And I trust you enough to 

1030
00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:44,080
believe that what you have 
withheld from me is just as much

1031
00:47:44,080 --> 00:47:46,120
a part of your goodness as what 
you have provided to me. 

1032
00:47:46,680 --> 00:47:48,000
It's a completely different way 
of living. 

1033
00:47:48,000 --> 00:47:50,200
It's something that the world 
will never understand. 

1034
00:47:51,320 --> 00:47:53,280
I just want you to know that 
envy spends its life looking 

1035
00:47:53,280 --> 00:47:55,320
sideways at other people. 
When Paul says I can do 

1036
00:47:55,320 --> 00:47:57,720
everything through Christ, who 
gives me strength, he's not 

1037
00:47:57,720 --> 00:48:02,200
talking about winning a 
championship or a 401K or a 

1038
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:04,640
personal dream. 
That's the way we tend to apply 

1039
00:48:04,640 --> 00:48:06,280
that scripture. 
He's talking about something 

1040
00:48:06,280 --> 00:48:07,800
that's deeper. 
He said whether I have a little 

1041
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:10,760
or I have a lot, Christ is 
enough and I can do anything he 

1042
00:48:10,760 --> 00:48:13,520
asks of me because he's the one 
that's going to equip me. 

1043
00:48:14,120 --> 00:48:16,200
His contentment wasn't anchored 
to what he possessed. 

1044
00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:18,800
His contentment was anchored to 
the one who possessed him. 

1045
00:48:20,440 --> 00:48:22,480
As we've walked through the 
story today and you saw Rachel 

1046
00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:25,160
and Leah spend years looking 
over the fence at each other, 

1047
00:48:25,160 --> 00:48:27,680
we've seen disciples argue over 
who's the greatest when the 

1048
00:48:27,680 --> 00:48:29,520
greatest was literally walking 
among them. 

1049
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:32,520
We can see how envy blinds us to
our blessings and our 

1050
00:48:32,520 --> 00:48:34,960
relationships. 
I just want to encourage you 

1051
00:48:34,960 --> 00:48:37,920
today, don't let your eyes go 
side to side. 

1052
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:41,240
Don't let them stay horizontal. 
Anytime you're struggling with 

1053
00:48:41,240 --> 00:48:43,800
this, you take it back to Him 
and you turn your eyes upward. 

1054
00:48:44,120 --> 00:48:47,120
You turn your eyes to Christ. 
If Christ is lifted up, he'll 

1055
00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:50,080
draw all men, all women to Him, 
and that includes you. 

1056
00:48:50,400 --> 00:48:51,680
Let Him draw you back to Him 
again. 

1057
00:48:51,680 --> 00:48:51,960
Amen.