1 00:00:00,040 --> 00:00:02,960 Some men don't fall apart because they're fine, they fall 2 00:00:02,960 --> 00:00:05,880 apart because they feel like everybody depends on them. 3 00:00:06,320 --> 00:00:08,200 Today at the All In podcast, we're going to be talking about 4 00:00:08,200 --> 00:00:12,040 the pressure of being the strong one, how that role forms, and 5 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:15,920 what it costs when you feel like you can't depend on people in 6 00:00:15,920 --> 00:00:17,880 your life. This is the All In podcast. 7 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:35,640 Thanks for tuning in. Did you guys say that you are 8 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:43,240 dependable people? I have a big back that can carry 9 00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:48,400 a lot of weight. Short king with wide lats. 10 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:53,480 My lats are so big I have to put chafing ointment under my 11 00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:56,240 armpits every day. I like that. 12 00:00:56,240 --> 00:00:57,040 That's cool. Thanks for. 13 00:00:57,040 --> 00:00:58,040 Sharing. Thanks for sharing that, Joe. 14 00:00:58,040 --> 00:00:59,720 Michael, you're welcome. I would say I'm dependable, 15 00:00:59,920 --> 00:01:04,200 Yeah, yeah. Tell us why. 16 00:01:05,519 --> 00:01:06,960 I, I'd like to come through for people. 17 00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:13,440 Yeah, you know, no, I, I think mainly I am someone that's very 18 00:01:13,440 --> 00:01:15,640 steady. I would agree. 19 00:01:16,080 --> 00:01:22,160 And I think people know that, or at least my friends know that, 20 00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:26,360 and they can depend on me just being steady and being, you 21 00:01:26,360 --> 00:01:31,520 know, dependent. Be the strong one. 22 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:35,120 John, Michael, this is something that, you know, again, we've 23 00:01:35,120 --> 00:01:37,440 known each other for a very long time, too long. 24 00:01:37,720 --> 00:01:41,680 And in college, you were a bit all over the place. 25 00:01:42,560 --> 00:01:43,400 He wasn't. You were. 26 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:45,200 What? Did you say who was it? 27 00:01:46,640 --> 00:01:49,040 Well. There's there's people that we 28 00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:52,040 can think of, but but John Michael was one that you didn't 29 00:01:52,040 --> 00:01:55,800 know if he was going to show up when he said he was going to 30 00:01:55,800 --> 00:01:56,840 shout out. Oh yeah, early. 31 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:58,640 Early, early. To a different place if. 32 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:01,560 He was going to respond to your text if he was going to, if he 33 00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:03,200 was alive. You just never knew what was 34 00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:04,000 going on. What? 35 00:02:04,000 --> 00:02:06,800 What mode of transportation was going to get him from point A to 36 00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:11,480 point? BI have a tier list on like who 37 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:15,320 I who I'm dependable towards. I don't know if this if you're 38 00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:18,280 the same way of like there's some people that I will move 39 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:20,480 everything else for and there are people that will move 40 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:23,360 somethings for and there are people that I won't move much 41 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:24,360 for. You know what I mean? 42 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:25,920 I don't know if that's what you're saying with John Michael, 43 00:02:25,920 --> 00:02:29,000 you'd. Be in that third. 44 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:31,160 Category No, no, no. You'd be in the top category. 45 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:34,920 What would you guys? Let's define that a little bit 46 00:02:34,920 --> 00:02:37,120 more. When you say someone is 47 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:40,000 dependable, what exactly does that mean? 48 00:02:45,920 --> 00:02:50,160 You can depend. You can't use the word in its 49 00:02:50,160 --> 00:02:53,600 own definition. In this language. 50 00:02:54,480 --> 00:02:56,080 Yes, thank you. You could do it in Spanish if 51 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:58,360 you wanted to. How do you say dependable in 52 00:02:58,360 --> 00:03:01,760 Spanish? I don't know dependable. 53 00:03:01,800 --> 00:03:04,280 I don't know. You have to remember that I 54 00:03:04,280 --> 00:03:06,960 moved to states when I was in 4th, 5th grade. 55 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:09,600 I I still talk Spanish with my family but. 56 00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:11,440 But you don't talk about being dependable. 57 00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:13,480 I don't know how many third grades you know that talk about 58 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:16,080 different speak dependable not a word that. 59 00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:18,440 Is do you have a third grade vocabulary in Spanish? 60 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:22,560 No, I would say I have more. It's hard to define, you know, I 61 00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:25,160 would say I have, I definitely have a vigor vocabulary in 62 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:30,000 English, in Spanish, but I would say I have middle school, high 63 00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:34,120 school level vocabulary. Really interesting. 64 00:03:34,640 --> 00:03:37,280 I have no grammar skills. I'm not dependable when it comes 65 00:03:37,280 --> 00:03:40,800 to the grammar in Spanish. In Spanish, like how would what 66 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:43,400 does that mean in English? Like if you're bad at grammar 67 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:48,440 when you're speaking, but it's like what you're. 68 00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:51,400 Saying if you're bad in grammar in Spanish, you're bad. 69 00:03:51,400 --> 00:03:52,120 What? Is English. 70 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,240 I don't know what that means though. 71 00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:55,720 Like to be bad. OK, I'll I'll, I'll share this 72 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:56,840 story. That was wrong. 73 00:03:56,840 --> 00:03:58,800 Pronouns you. Did that good versus you did 74 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:00,320 that well like that kind of thing? 75 00:04:00,320 --> 00:04:03,480 That's great, no? Like in Spanish accents, like I 76 00:04:03,480 --> 00:04:05,200 don't know how to write in Spanish that well. 77 00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,200 Accents. There's a lot of hidden letters 78 00:04:07,200 --> 00:04:09,080 like. A little mustache over the end. 79 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:10,480 Yeah, the Enya. Enya is. 80 00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:14,400 It like when John Michaels says I axed him versus asked him do. 81 00:04:14,400 --> 00:04:16,440 You say that? Yeah, my wife says that. 82 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,920 I axed him. It's a very losing anything. 83 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,360 I think it comes from my background in the hood. 84 00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:27,080 And your private school and your private school in Dallas. 85 00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:30,880 Yeah, but I I'll close this out and then go back to 86 00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:35,160 dependability. It is So when I moved to the 87 00:04:35,160 --> 00:04:39,440 States, when I got here in 4th grade, they had already done 88 00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:43,840 grammar like in in America, like a dude, like second, third 89 00:04:43,840 --> 00:04:46,800 grade. So I still get really lost with, 90 00:04:48,160 --> 00:04:50,840 I know an adjective is a person, place, or thing. 91 00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:52,600 That's about as far as my grammar goes. 92 00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:56,520 I know how to draft a sentence. I know how to write. 93 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:58,320 I know, but I don't know what an adverb is. 94 00:04:59,920 --> 00:05:00,880 Fascinating. Yeah. 95 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,880 What are we talking about? Again, the chosen ones. 96 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:08,640 So whenever you opened up this episode, I really thought you 97 00:05:08,640 --> 00:05:10,440 were going to say the hidden pressure being a chosen 1. 98 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:13,120 Yes. That's how you named it, which I 99 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:18,480 thought was a killer name. Do you think Anakin felt a lot 100 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:21,200 of pressure? Did he know he was a chosen 1? 101 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,200 I don't. At what point did he find out? 102 00:05:25,760 --> 00:05:27,960 You, you you're the, you're the Star Wars guy. 103 00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:30,960 You're a huge Star Wars fan. I would call you Star Wars nerd. 104 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:32,040 Really. Yeah. 105 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:34,400 I read the books. Yeah, other books, the comics. 106 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:37,440 Absolutely, there's books. No, but the the movies didn't 107 00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:39,200 come from books I don't think. The books came out of. 108 00:05:39,280 --> 00:05:40,720 Movies. The books came out of movies. 109 00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:45,440 OK, I'm a Harry Potter nerd. Yeah, yeah, Chosen 1. 110 00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:49,840 In high school, I was ranked in the top 1000 in the world in 111 00:05:49,840 --> 00:05:53,000 Harry Potter trivia. On on Sporkle. 112 00:05:53,280 --> 00:06:00,880 Or there was a trivia app but everyone was on it and so it was 113 00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:02,280 a good ranking. I I still hold. 114 00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:03,800 You got to think that's a lot of pressure. 115 00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:06,000 Both of your parents get murdered when you're an infant 116 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:08,880 and the whole world is depending on you by the time you're 11 117 00:06:08,880 --> 00:06:12,400 years old. Yeah, No, Yeah. 118 00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:15,320 I mean, yeah. Hard to find more pressure in 119 00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:19,960 the world and your best friend's a ginger and your. 120 00:06:19,960 --> 00:06:23,600 Best friend's ginger. That's tough. 121 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,520 There were some other movie chosen ones. 122 00:06:27,240 --> 00:06:28,880 We named Anakin. We named Harry Potter. 123 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:32,920 What is Anakin the Chosen 1? He was, he was supposed to be 124 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:35,560 the future. But in this is where I get lost 125 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:37,600 in Star Wars. You guys can correct me. 126 00:06:37,680 --> 00:06:40,360 I thought. Wasn't Luke Skywalker the chosen 127 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:42,680 1? Isn't that up for the bait? 128 00:06:42,680 --> 00:06:45,080 Is that? Well, he was the chosen one, but 129 00:06:45,080 --> 00:06:47,680 then that's the whole thing is Anakin's his son and so it was 130 00:06:47,680 --> 00:06:49,080 supposed to. Pass down. 131 00:06:50,200 --> 00:06:52,560 Anakin is the dad he becomes. I got my movies, I think. 132 00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,640 Palpatine was a Chosen. One I got my. 133 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:58,760 Movies mixed up anyways. Other people. 134 00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,880 Would you say? Simba is was a chosen one. 135 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,000 That's a lot of pressure. Huge. 136 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:06,640 You watch your dad get murdered. All in cold blood movies have to 137 00:07:06,640 --> 00:07:11,080 do with murder, murder, attempts of fathers and then the sons 138 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:15,040 become yeah, the chosen one. But isn't. 139 00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:19,360 OK, back to the Star Wars thing. What's the what's the the girl's 140 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:21,560 name in the last one? Elsa. 141 00:07:21,760 --> 00:07:28,840 Hermione. It's Sky. 142 00:07:29,080 --> 00:07:30,560 She's a Skywalker. She finds out. 143 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:34,400 She's Layla. Layla Ray. 144 00:07:35,120 --> 00:07:38,560 Ray Skywalker So is it, you know, obviously those movies are 145 00:07:39,080 --> 00:07:40,800 would you? I wouldn't call them spin offs. 146 00:07:40,800 --> 00:07:42,520 They're sequels. But it was stories that were 147 00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:47,120 created not by George RR Martin, but by George Orwell, George 148 00:07:47,120 --> 00:07:53,400 Lucas, George Orwell, excuse me, George Lucas, but by whoever it 149 00:07:53,400 --> 00:07:54,520 was. George Lucas. 150 00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:56,680 No, he didn't write the, he did the. 151 00:07:56,680 --> 00:07:59,440 First, oh, the sequels. What was his name? 152 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:00,840 Well, that was the whole thing with it. 153 00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:03,920 It was that big director JJ Abrams. 154 00:08:04,040 --> 00:08:05,640 JJ Abrams did well. He only did. 155 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:07,640 Want it too. He wrote the first one, which 156 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,480 was copy paste one of the other movies. 157 00:08:09,480 --> 00:08:16,040 And then Ryan Johnson, who all of his movies are fantastic that 158 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:20,520 not relate to Star Wars, wrote the the one after and he tried 159 00:08:20,520 --> 00:08:23,840 to like add things to it and like just like be more creative 160 00:08:23,840 --> 00:08:26,520 with Star Wars because I would Star Wars I think gets a little 161 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:30,040 stale when it's like everything about these movies has to be 162 00:08:30,400 --> 00:08:33,600 like surrounds one family. You know, it's like the whole 163 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:36,200 Galaxy surrounds one family, the Skywalker family, so. 164 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,600 In in the and. Then people didn't like it, and 165 00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:41,640 so JJ Abrams took it back over. And then the last one did 166 00:08:41,799 --> 00:08:44,920 storylines, things that Ryan Johnson did. 167 00:08:44,920 --> 00:08:47,320 And that's where it got like even wonkier than it did before. 168 00:08:47,320 --> 00:08:50,640 And it it was just a mess. But in But you would would we 169 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:55,080 say now, now knowing now having seen all nine of the movies, 170 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:56,800 it's 9, right? Yeah, 9 movies. 171 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:58,680 Yeah, plus. Cartoon Network series you kind 172 00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:00,120 of throw. That in there, yeah, Attack. 173 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:02,360 The Rogue One. Yeah, yeah, exactly. 174 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:05,040 We have some of those. But now, seeing all nine movies, 175 00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:09,000 would we say that Ray Skywalker is actually the Chosen 1? 176 00:09:18,840 --> 00:09:20,120 That's a great question. I. 177 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:23,000 Played the entire time I played the. 178 00:09:24,280 --> 00:09:26,360 That's a great question. What a great scene. 179 00:09:26,360 --> 00:09:27,880 But she's somewhat, you know, in the final. 180 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:34,040 In the final scene. She has to learn dependence. 181 00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:36,720 You know she's in. She's an orphan, right? 182 00:09:36,760 --> 00:09:38,360 Or yeah, she's an orphan to an extent. 183 00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:45,280 Or maybe her. To an extent. 184 00:09:48,720 --> 00:09:50,840 Well, I mean just. Only one of my parents died. 185 00:09:50,880 --> 00:09:52,600 Well, yeah. So I'm trying to remember. 186 00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,080 She disbanded the. Work like a medical news como so 187 00:09:55,240 --> 00:09:59,000 yeah. But she learns dependence in the 188 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:00,320 final scene. Not to spoil it for our 189 00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:02,680 listeners if you haven't. Well, she she learns dependence 190 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:04,040 using. I don't think we're spoiling 191 00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:06,400 anything, I don't think. We're, I think we're. 192 00:10:07,920 --> 00:10:11,120 We know nothing. Well anyways, I got to imagine a 193 00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:13,200 lot of these people bought some pressure in their lives. 194 00:10:13,760 --> 00:10:15,800 So what do you guys think it means to be dependable? 195 00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:22,200 I wanted to go back to our list of of chosen, the chosen ones 196 00:10:22,200 --> 00:10:24,600 that didn't work out because we hit the movie. 197 00:10:24,960 --> 00:10:27,640 We hit the movie realm. Yes, maybe we can go to like a 198 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:31,760 politics realm, a sports realm of who are the chosen ones. 199 00:10:31,760 --> 00:10:33,840 That never worked out. Can you know someone that 200 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:36,560 probably had way too much pressure on them? 201 00:10:38,040 --> 00:10:44,880 Tell us. MO Bamba, you like I, I, I, I 202 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:47,760 don't remember if he was that good in college or anything. 203 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:48,360 He didn't. Even. 204 00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:51,120 Play for he went to UT Austin. Oh yeah, he's. 205 00:10:51,160 --> 00:10:53,760 A Longhorn 71. Yeah, he, he's a tall dude, but 206 00:10:54,440 --> 00:10:57,480 I don't remember him doing much. And then next thing you know, 207 00:10:57,480 --> 00:11:00,200 there's a song with his name that blew up that. 208 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:01,400 Everyone was. Like the song I? 209 00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:04,120 Don't know if people know that it's about an actual person. 210 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:05,840 No. But then I don't know if he's 211 00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:07,120 still in the league. I don't think he really worked 212 00:11:07,120 --> 00:11:08,080 out. That's got to be a lot of 213 00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:10,960 pressure. You're a household name not 214 00:11:10,960 --> 00:11:12,920 because of what you do, but because someone wrote a song 215 00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:16,160 about your name and now you're not that good at basketball. 216 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:18,760 Is he even in the NBA anymore? I don't know. 217 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:22,680 I thought in Europe. Brownie James. 218 00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,040 Right I. Mean it's too early to tell if 219 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:26,640 he's too. Early. 220 00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:28,840 I wouldn't say it too early. What about Zion? 221 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:32,840 I mean, yes, for sure that's that was the next route that I 222 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:35,520 was going to get was #1 draft picks that turned out to be 223 00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:36,800 busts. So I feel like that's kind of 224 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:37,400 like the. I don't. 225 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:39,520 I wouldn't put Zion in the bust category. 226 00:11:39,920 --> 00:11:41,760 Where would you put? It I would put him in the. 227 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:47,400 Hasn't just yet. He's been a while, but. 228 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:49,880 He's a. 100% a bust. You think so? 229 00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:51,120 Eight years in the. NBA. 230 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:54,720 So I saw a stat that he has been injured for more games. 231 00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:56,840 He's been on the IR, more games than he's played in his 232 00:11:56,840 --> 00:11:59,800 eight-year NBA career. He's a full bust, just like he 233 00:11:59,800 --> 00:12:02,880 busted his shoe because he was £300 and the shoe couldn't take 234 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:04,880 it any. Well, so I mean, OK, there 235 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:06,760 there's an element of him being a bust. 236 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,200 A lot of his injuries were due to the fact that he's 237 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:13,720 overweight. And so you could say maybe you 238 00:12:13,720 --> 00:12:16,160 could put, I just think if you're dealing with injuries, do 239 00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:18,640 you count that person as a bust? I'm talking you think that their 240 00:12:18,640 --> 00:12:21,800 talent level because he's extremely talented. 241 00:12:23,400 --> 00:12:26,800 But he can't play. Right, because he's well, 242 00:12:26,800 --> 00:12:28,440 because. He's not dependable. 243 00:12:29,640 --> 00:12:31,960 He can't play. That's the definition of a bust. 244 00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:35,920 Like maybe for your average fan he's not a bust, but for the GM 245 00:12:35,920 --> 00:12:39,720 that made that pick, that's a bust because this person was 246 00:12:39,720 --> 00:12:42,600 going to change your franchise. That's fair. 247 00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,480 But I, I don't, I don't know. I'm just like. 248 00:12:45,240 --> 00:12:48,400 OK, talk about pressure. Someone that actually, I, I 249 00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:51,160 think of two people that had all the pressure in the world but 250 00:12:51,160 --> 00:12:55,480 actually panned out, Kobe Bryant. 251 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:59,160 Kobe and we we. Have not talked about Kobe in a 252 00:12:59,160 --> 00:13:01,720 couple episodes now. Yeah, I'm glad he made it back 253 00:13:01,720 --> 00:13:02,640 on the cast. Yeah, absolutely. 254 00:13:02,920 --> 00:13:06,120 But both of them had so much pressure, and you could argue 255 00:13:06,120 --> 00:13:07,680 that maybe LeBron had more pressure. 256 00:13:08,680 --> 00:13:09,640 I think so. Right. 257 00:13:09,760 --> 00:13:13,040 It, it's like it's, it's actually kind of cool to see. 258 00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:18,120 I don't know of any any high schooler that's had as much 259 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:20,560 pressure as LeBron James. You know they're. 260 00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:25,000 Common not just like hasn't just lived up to the explanations, 261 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:27,240 but surpassed all the expectations, has never had 262 00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:28,920 anything bad come out about them. 263 00:13:29,320 --> 00:13:31,120 Like, the worst thing that's quite about LeBron James that 264 00:13:31,120 --> 00:13:32,920 he's a little cheesy and uses too many emojis. 265 00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:35,440 You know, like, oh, he loves pictures. 266 00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:37,800 He loves kids. I can't believe this in my life. 267 00:13:39,720 --> 00:13:42,320 I. Love that picture that's. 268 00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:43,520 True. What both of them have in 269 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:46,800 common, what that two people have in common at this table, 270 00:13:47,480 --> 00:13:48,600 they went to private high schools. 271 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:52,320 Catholic High School. Catholic private high schools. 272 00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,560 Yeah, that's. Probably why they're successful. 273 00:13:54,560 --> 00:13:55,720 Yeah, that's a good. Point. 274 00:13:55,720 --> 00:13:58,440 That is an interesting thing. How many elite level athletes 275 00:13:58,440 --> 00:13:59,920 come from Catholic High schools? Kevin? 276 00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:06,640 Durant, Leonard, Fournette, Mobomba, Potentially. 277 00:14:07,000 --> 00:14:10,600 We didn't look that one up. Yeah, well, so here's the thing. 278 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:17,080 I think there's 2, two different types of, you know, OK, so we're 279 00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:19,040 talking, we're talking about high level athletes and we're 280 00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:22,400 also talking about historical figures like Anakin and Harry 281 00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:25,400 Potter. And King David. 282 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:29,720 And King David and you know, there's there they they 283 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:34,760 literally are the the the chosen ones to an to an extent. 284 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:37,880 I mean, LeBron has been, you know, the chosen ones. 285 00:14:38,280 --> 00:14:40,600 Chess are back. What does it say? 286 00:14:40,920 --> 00:14:42,120 Chosen. It says chosen one. 287 00:14:42,360 --> 00:14:44,800 I mean, it's literally been since he was a sophomore in high 288 00:14:44,800 --> 00:14:46,640 school where he's supposed to be the greatest. 289 00:14:46,640 --> 00:14:49,080 Player on the cover of SI Magazine at 16. 290 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:51,560 Exactly, You know, And so the amount of pressure that's placed 291 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:53,080 on him, same thing with Harry Potter. 292 00:14:53,240 --> 00:14:55,840 You know, everybody knows what he's he's supposed to do before 293 00:14:55,840 --> 00:14:58,400 he even knows. So there's there's that reality 294 00:14:58,800 --> 00:15:01,560 of the immense pressure that comes from having a high level 295 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:04,320 of talent and people expecting you to perform. 296 00:15:04,680 --> 00:15:06,720 But then I would say there's also the pressure that we place 297 00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:11,080 on ourselves and the roles that we play in our life of, you 298 00:15:11,080 --> 00:15:14,440 know, there's almost like manufactured pressure to an 299 00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:18,840 extent of like, you know, I, I need to perform because other 300 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:21,720 people are, are depending on me in situations where maybe that's 301 00:15:21,720 --> 00:15:25,080 true of situations that maybe it's not true at all, but 302 00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:27,640 they're just a random example that I'm thinking about. 303 00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:30,320 John Michael is one of our roommates in college was 304 00:15:30,320 --> 00:15:34,280 responsible for our house budget when it comes to the our our 305 00:15:34,280 --> 00:15:37,280 rent and utilities, you know, and he made this huge 306 00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:40,240 spreadsheet and, you know, you know, we were supposed to pay 307 00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:41,520 him at a certain time every month. 308 00:15:41,520 --> 00:15:43,800 And he was always the one that was getting on all of our butts 309 00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:45,120 of like, hey, you need to do this. 310 00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:48,240 And it's like we all pay the rent, you know, but for whatever 311 00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:53,480 reason that that role was, was placed on him and then the rest 312 00:15:53,480 --> 00:15:55,600 of us kind of became undependable. 313 00:15:55,680 --> 00:15:57,880 At least I did for sure. I was always late on my Venmo 314 00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:02,200 payments to, to him, but he, he, he took on that role in their 315 00:16:02,200 --> 00:16:04,160 lives. Have you guys seen seen that 316 00:16:04,160 --> 00:16:07,120 play out in your lives as well, where you kind of manufacture 317 00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:11,080 this pressure and make yourself think that, you know that 318 00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:14,280 there's more people depending on you and you have to be, you 319 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:16,600 know, the strong one in certain situations when maybe that's not 320 00:16:16,600 --> 00:16:20,320 necessarily true? Yeah, I mean, I think right off 321 00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:23,680 the bat I think about I'm the oldest in my family, Clayton's 322 00:16:23,680 --> 00:16:25,800 the oldest. You are not middle. 323 00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:33,080 Middle explains a lot. A lot. 324 00:16:34,880 --> 00:16:37,240 But I think when you're the oldest sibling, you naturally 325 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,160 kind of have to take on more responsibility than your other 326 00:16:40,160 --> 00:16:42,680 siblings because you're you're thrust into a leadership role 327 00:16:43,120 --> 00:16:45,480 where you have to take on things quicker than your siblings. 328 00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:49,960 And so I think that honestly, for me, that created a sense of 329 00:16:50,120 --> 00:16:52,640 kind of that burden of responsibility of like, I can't, 330 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:56,200 can't really ask anyone for help because everyone is depending on 331 00:16:56,200 --> 00:16:58,920 me. And when you create that sense 332 00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:03,080 of I can't ask for help because people are depending on me, it, 333 00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:06,200 it creates a sort of hyper independence and and 334 00:17:06,200 --> 00:17:12,760 self-reliance that in from the outside looking in is a example 335 00:17:12,760 --> 00:17:16,960 of probably a successful person, but interiorly can be a very 336 00:17:16,960 --> 00:17:20,520 dangerous thing when you start believing I can't be helped by 337 00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:24,079 other people. And you know, I felt that at 338 00:17:24,079 --> 00:17:28,960 certain points as a father where, you know, your wife leans 339 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:32,760 on you, the kids lean on your wife and on you. 340 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,880 And then you're kind of sitting back going, well, where do I, 341 00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:38,960 how do I help? My wife's having a hard time. 342 00:17:38,960 --> 00:17:41,200 OK, she's leaning on me. My kids are having a hard time. 343 00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,360 They're leaning on her. And therefore she's leaning on 344 00:17:43,360 --> 00:17:44,800 me. Where do I go? 345 00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:48,680 And I go to work and I'm the man and everyone and everyone is 346 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:50,480 leaning on me and everyone's asking me for things. 347 00:17:50,480 --> 00:17:52,320 And then I, I talked to my dad on the phone. 348 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:53,680 He's like, hey, can you talk to your brother? 349 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:58,240 And, and all of a sudden you, you feel like I am, I am the guy 350 00:17:58,240 --> 00:18:01,360 for everyone in my life. There is no one to come help me. 351 00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,560 I'm by myself. My parents need me, my siblings 352 00:18:03,560 --> 00:18:06,040 need me. My, my kids need me, need me. 353 00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,680 And, and I think that's honestly one of the struggles of having 354 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:12,240 come to faith in Christ and having come into leadership 355 00:18:12,240 --> 00:18:15,200 early in our lives is that we have many people who aren't at 356 00:18:15,200 --> 00:18:17,440 that level. And so they look to us as a 357 00:18:17,440 --> 00:18:19,200 sense of stability in their lives. 358 00:18:19,760 --> 00:18:22,480 And it's, it's lonely, man. It's lonely. 359 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:26,400 Yeah, now, and I would say that that I feel like that's a common 360 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:30,440 thing amongst men, right, Is you, you put that pressure on 361 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:33,560 yourself and and you attempt to isolate and and even from the 362 00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:35,880 small silly ones too. I know we've left about this in, 363 00:18:35,880 --> 00:18:40,160 in previous episodes of I, I put this pressure on some of that. 364 00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:42,600 I feel like I have to fix everything in my house, right 365 00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:47,880 from the silly things of like, you know, we, we got some what 366 00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:51,520 portraits, pictures of like our wedding and it and it took me 367 00:18:51,520 --> 00:18:54,640 like weeks to put it up right. And I was like, can you just do 368 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:55,760 something? I was like, no, I'm supposed to 369 00:18:55,760 --> 00:18:57,120 fix it. Like I'm supposed to do this, 370 00:18:57,680 --> 00:18:59,000 right. Hey, our washing machine work. 371 00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:00,800 OK, I need to fix it. She's like just text her 372 00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,920 landlord. It's like, no, I have to fix it. 373 00:19:04,280 --> 00:19:07,120 And those are silly examples. But I do feel like that that 374 00:19:07,120 --> 00:19:09,280 does magnify. And it keeps building and 375 00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:12,720 building where I'm like, yeah, whether you're the oldest child 376 00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:16,040 or not, that's a very common experience amongst men, that 377 00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:17,840 you've put this pressure on yourself and you tend to 378 00:19:17,840 --> 00:19:19,200 isolate. And you're right. 379 00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:22,400 Where do you turn from there? And we can get stuck because 380 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,240 we're because we don't know where to turn. 381 00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,080 I think one of the, one of the issues is when you show 382 00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:30,680 competence in life that people just start assuming that you're 383 00:19:30,680 --> 00:19:33,280 OK. And so when you, when you are 384 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:36,080 coming across as, Hey, I'm doing well in my life, I got this 385 00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:37,960 leadership role, I got this job, whatever. 386 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:39,880 People are just like, oh, well, Jose is fine. 387 00:19:40,120 --> 00:19:41,400 You know, I'm not worried about him. 388 00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:43,720 He's doing great. I'm, I'm, I'm never going to 389 00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:47,240 check in. And so competence becomes a, an 390 00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:50,880 excuse for people to not engage you and actually say, Hey, it's 391 00:19:50,880 --> 00:19:53,560 OK if you're not, it's OK if you're not hitting the boxes 392 00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,040 this week. So. 393 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:59,280 I think we've all heard the phrase it's lonely at the top. 394 00:20:00,760 --> 00:20:04,720 It's lonely at the top and this is that experience of 395 00:20:04,720 --> 00:20:08,080 loneliness, I think is something that a lot of leaders feel, you 396 00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:10,520 know, whether you're at the top of an organization or you're 397 00:20:10,520 --> 00:20:13,560 leading A-Team or you're leading a family or you feel like you 398 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:16,880 kind of play this leadership role, you know, amongst your, 399 00:20:17,120 --> 00:20:19,560 you know, amongst your siblings even or amongst your friend 400 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:21,280 group. What would you guys say is the 401 00:20:21,280 --> 00:20:26,320 difference between self-reliance and authentic leadership? 402 00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,560 You know, I think that when people say lonely at the top, 403 00:20:32,560 --> 00:20:35,920 there could be a reality that they have forced that upon us. 404 00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:39,920 Like they, they've actually created that situation for 405 00:20:39,920 --> 00:20:43,640 themselves because, you know, they've lost, they've lost trust 406 00:20:43,640 --> 00:20:46,240 with people and now they're calling it loneliness. 407 00:20:46,560 --> 00:20:48,000 And oh, it's, it's only at the top. 408 00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:51,520 You know, meanwhile, I actually just burn bridges with those 409 00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:55,120 that I work with and they don't want to work with me day in and 410 00:20:55,120 --> 00:20:58,920 day out anymore. Or, you know, you confuse the 411 00:20:59,040 --> 00:21:02,760 solitude with being significant in your in your company or in 412 00:21:02,760 --> 00:21:05,920 your organization. And so there's there's a reality 413 00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:09,240 that you pointed out of it could be loneliness at the top, could 414 00:21:09,240 --> 00:21:14,160 be an example of virtue and that you have being been magnanimous 415 00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:17,280 and achieved a result or an outcome that nobody else has. 416 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:20,680 And that has created a natural distance between you and people 417 00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:24,440 who may not have the same capacity or environment to 418 00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:27,520 thrive that you have. It could also mean, though, that 419 00:21:27,520 --> 00:21:30,960 maybe you're actually the issue and you need to take a deeper 420 00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,720 look at that and figure out, all right, why am I the type of 421 00:21:33,720 --> 00:21:37,480 person that people actually don't want to engage with? 422 00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:41,640 And I'm confusing that as leadership. 423 00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:47,280 I think one thing that I've kind of felt in that I've come 424 00:21:47,280 --> 00:21:49,640 through is my own life, and I don't know if you guys would 425 00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:54,080 relate of a yeah, this loneliness a lot of times was 426 00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:56,720 self-imposed, right? And what actually needed to 427 00:21:56,720 --> 00:22:00,320 happen was I just need to put an effort to connect with people. 428 00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:06,760 But I was confused on what connection meant because sure, 429 00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:12,840 maybe, you know, I was at a role where I was, you know, in charge 430 00:22:12,840 --> 00:22:15,520 of a team. Oh, well, it's so lonely because 431 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:17,440 other people don't really know what this is like. 432 00:22:18,320 --> 00:22:21,720 Therefore we can't connect. But it's like, I don't, they 433 00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:24,200 don't need to know what it's like for you to connect, right? 434 00:22:24,200 --> 00:22:26,480 They don't need to have the same experiences for there to be 435 00:22:26,480 --> 00:22:28,320 connection. There just needs to be more 436 00:22:28,320 --> 00:22:31,840 effort for me to like be able to reach out and to explain and and 437 00:22:32,800 --> 00:22:36,040 for the other person to receive without having to say, hey, I've 438 00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:38,760 actually been through that too. And I think I got confused in 439 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:41,960 that a lot too, where I thought connection meant you have gone 440 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:43,920 through the same thing, therefore you understand. 441 00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:47,800 But it's like, no, you are just my friend and you want to listen 442 00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:49,800 and you understand what I'm feeling. 443 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:51,480 You might not understand what it's like to lead A-Team. 444 00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:54,880 This is a, a, a small example, right? 445 00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:57,880 But I, I got so confused with that of like, what does it 446 00:22:57,880 --> 00:23:00,000 actually mean to connect that I thought it was loneliness? 447 00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:05,040 When in fact, I seem to make a bigger effort to actually, you 448 00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:07,520 know, talk to other people and, and explain what's happening to 449 00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:10,280 the people and be OK with them not having the same experiences 450 00:23:11,120 --> 00:23:12,400 and still finding connection to that. 451 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,760 Does that make sense? Very well said. 452 00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:19,080 Would you would you very well said No, absolutely. 453 00:23:19,080 --> 00:23:21,640 I think that the thing that you said that I was like, wow, that 454 00:23:21,880 --> 00:23:25,840 pull that out as a nugget was when you said shared experience 455 00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:28,920 doesn't mean connection. We don't have to have shared, 456 00:23:28,960 --> 00:23:31,800 shared experiences for us to actually connect on things. 457 00:23:32,440 --> 00:23:35,400 And I thought that honestly, that's that's the mindset of a 458 00:23:35,400 --> 00:23:38,800 leader is we may not actually see the same things. 459 00:23:38,800 --> 00:23:40,960 We don't get the same emails. We don't have the same 460 00:23:40,960 --> 00:23:43,160 responsibilities. I'm more at pressure than you 461 00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:45,040 are. But that doesn't, it doesn't 462 00:23:45,040 --> 00:23:46,600 really matter when it comes to connection. 463 00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,000 And so I want to, I want to take an opportunity to find things 464 00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:53,840 that we connect on so that it is lonely in the sense of I'm the 465 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:56,920 one who has the responsibility, but it's not lonely in the sense 466 00:23:56,920 --> 00:23:59,800 of I have a community of people that I'm engaging with to help 467 00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:04,520 me solve creative problems. I, I know for myself too, like a 468 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:07,200 lot of times the the lie that I keep telling myself is like, 469 00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:10,520 well, they don't get it right. They don't know what this is 470 00:24:10,520 --> 00:24:14,760 like and all that light did was make me isolate. 471 00:24:18,120 --> 00:24:21,600 One of the things that I've been wrestling with myself recently 472 00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:28,080 is asking the question, what does it actually mean to rely on 473 00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:31,560 God? I, I don't, I do not have an 474 00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:34,560 answer to that question because I do not understand it myself. 475 00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:37,280 But one of the things that I've thought about, you know, over 476 00:24:37,280 --> 00:24:42,560 the course of of my own, of my own fatherhood is that, you 477 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:45,480 know, as a, as a husband and father, I want to be someone 478 00:24:45,480 --> 00:24:49,080 that is reliant on God. But it's, it's hard to say that 479 00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:52,280 I'm dependent upon God or I'm dependent upon other people when 480 00:24:52,280 --> 00:24:54,320 there are other people that are depending upon me. 481 00:24:55,040 --> 00:24:56,520 My children are depending upon me. 482 00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:58,600 My wife is, is depending upon me. 483 00:24:58,800 --> 00:25:01,760 And the temptation is to say, if I have other people depending on 484 00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:05,560 me, then the safest thing for me to do is to be hyper independent 485 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:07,080 and to be completely dependent myself. 486 00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:11,360 I need to be able to know factually and certainly with 487 00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:15,320 certainty that that, you know, I can provide everything that is 488 00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:18,880 needed for my wife and children, if you understand what I'm 489 00:25:18,880 --> 00:25:21,960 saying there. And so, you know, the, the, the 490 00:25:21,960 --> 00:25:26,200 reality is, is that, you know, I can go to prayer and I can say, 491 00:25:26,200 --> 00:25:30,600 God, I need help, you know, like I'm, I'm feeling weighed down by 492 00:25:30,600 --> 00:25:34,240 a lot of different things, you know, and I can go to him and I 493 00:25:34,240 --> 00:25:39,520 can express those things to him. But then that there's a part of 494 00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,800 me that it's like that doesn't, that doesn't change the, the 495 00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:45,960 reality of, of what's, of what's going of what's going on here, 496 00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:48,360 which is just that the things still need to get done. 497 00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:50,920 You know, there, there are things that are, are dependent 498 00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:54,160 upon me. And so I don't know, I, I, I 499 00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:57,480 don't know what to, what it actually means to say I'm there. 500 00:25:57,480 --> 00:26:00,720 There's a freedom that exists, you know, exists when you are 501 00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:04,160 dependent upon God that I don't, you know, there's a part of me 502 00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:06,920 where I'm like, I don't know what that experience is actually 503 00:26:07,360 --> 00:26:09,320 is actually Like, does that resonate with you guys at all? 504 00:26:11,120 --> 00:26:13,480 Yeah, I think it does. And and we could spend like a 505 00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:16,440 whole other three hours talking about this and maybe we will 506 00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:19,560 later on. But that what you're saying 507 00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:21,480 reminds me a lot of the idea of surrendering. 508 00:26:21,480 --> 00:26:26,040 And I remember when, you know, as I'm maturing my spiritual 509 00:26:26,040 --> 00:26:28,920 life, people tell me like, well, you need surrender things to God 510 00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:31,920 and be like, OK, I did. And then now what? 511 00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:34,760 Like it didn't change anything. I said the prayer, I said the 512 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:36,960 surrender prayer, and now I'm surrendered. 513 00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:39,240 But it's similar to that. It's like, OK, you need to bet, 514 00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:43,000 not God. It's like, OK, I thought I did. 515 00:26:43,000 --> 00:26:46,640 No, like, I'm still lonely. I'm still going through 516 00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:51,360 something really hard. I relate to the experience and 517 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,160 honestly, what I relate to the most is not having a a 518 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:56,760 formulated full answer to the problem, right. 519 00:26:57,360 --> 00:27:03,000 And I think as we're, you know, a couple seasons into this 520 00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:06,520 podcast, I think what's what we've discovered is, you know, 521 00:27:06,520 --> 00:27:10,000 for our listeners, it's it's that it's not that we have 522 00:27:10,080 --> 00:27:13,520 explicit theological answers to your problems. 523 00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:17,840 We don't we are not theologians. We say things that it maybe are 524 00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:20,360 even a little heretical, like talking about King David 525 00:27:20,560 --> 00:27:22,560 earlier. But but our shared. 526 00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:28,800 Experiences that we have no idea what we're doing, but we're 527 00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:31,000 trying to chase after it together. 528 00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:34,640 And so to for our listeners to recognize. 529 00:27:34,920 --> 00:27:38,520 Obviously we don't have the full on answers to what it's like to 530 00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:41,000 be the chosen 1 and to hold the ball and to be the one to take 531 00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:44,760 the shot. But we are dedicated to figuring 532 00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:49,400 it out and we are also willing to share our faults, losses, 533 00:27:49,400 --> 00:27:52,360 vulnerabilities, lack of understanding in the process of 534 00:27:52,360 --> 00:27:58,880 doing that. Yeah, I think we need to learn 535 00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:01,200 how to give other people permission to support us and 536 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:04,680 understand ourselves what exactly that that looks like. 537 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:09,200 And I, I think Jose, you, you, you the highlight of, of our 538 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,400 conversation here is what you were saying, which is just that 539 00:28:11,440 --> 00:28:14,080 the shared experience, not having the shared experience 540 00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:16,720 doesn't eliminate, you know, the opportunity for connection. 541 00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:20,320 And I think something for our, our listeners back home is, is, 542 00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:23,960 you know, to, it's OK to wrestle with the idea and not understand 543 00:28:23,960 --> 00:28:26,480 what it looks like when you go to prayer and you want God to 544 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,280 fix your problems. You want to learn not to rely on 545 00:28:28,280 --> 00:28:30,320 God, but you're still feeling, you know, this pressure 546 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:32,240 yourself. And there's different instances 547 00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:34,200 of pressure in your life. There's, there's actual, real 548 00:28:34,200 --> 00:28:36,280 pressure of, hey, there's a time crunch, There's things that need 549 00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:37,440 to get done. There's pressure at work, 550 00:28:37,440 --> 00:28:39,680 there's pressure in the family life and things that exist. 551 00:28:39,680 --> 00:28:41,640 And that's, that's part of our life. 552 00:28:41,640 --> 00:28:44,000 That's part of our exile here on earth. 553 00:28:44,000 --> 00:28:47,160 And our and our pilgrimage is, you know, going through things 554 00:28:47,160 --> 00:28:49,760 that are really difficult and then being, you know, learning 555 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:52,840 to have the self-awareness and understanding of knowing when am 556 00:28:52,840 --> 00:28:56,760 I actually just putting pressure on myself that's that's undue. 557 00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:59,400 And I need to be able to express that to other people so they can 558 00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:01,360 speak into that and saying, Hey, you're being too critical of 559 00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:03,320 yourself, you're being too hard on yourself. 560 00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:05,200 You know, it. The what, the way what you're 561 00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:08,400 feeling, what you're thinking is, is not actually quite true. 562 00:29:08,800 --> 00:29:11,800 And then there's the pressure of of, you know, of being Harry 563 00:29:11,800 --> 00:29:15,560 Potter, of being Anakin. And so far, our our listeners 564 00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:18,520 back home, if any of you are responsible for saving entire 565 00:29:18,520 --> 00:29:23,400 universe of defeating evil itself and its entirety, if your 566 00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:25,600 father is LeBron James and you happen to play on the same 567 00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:29,520 basketball team as him and you know you're expected to be what 568 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:32,040 your what your dad is, just know we're with you. 569 00:29:32,400 --> 00:29:33,920 We understand what you're feeling. 570 00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:39,600 And we invite you to share this podcast with others that you 571 00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:42,720 know are going to be there to carry these things alongside 572 00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:45,280 with you. Share this podcast with others 573 00:29:45,280 --> 00:29:47,880 that that you can be vulnerable with, that you can share your 574 00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:51,920 experience with that you can, that you can connect with, share 575 00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:55,200 with someone who carries who, who, who's, who's carrying a 576 00:29:55,200 --> 00:29:58,160 load right now. And they need to just hear some 577 00:29:58,160 --> 00:30:03,400 humorous points about Anakin and Elsa Skywalker and, and, and, 578 00:30:03,400 --> 00:30:06,160 and John the Baptist. This is the all in podcast. 579 00:30:06,360 --> 00:30:07,040 Thanks for listening.