1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,040 Coming from somewhere between the open road and your next 2 00:00:03,040 --> 00:00:06,960 confession line, today we're redefining what spring break can 3 00:00:06,960 --> 00:00:09,280 really be like. Forget the stereotypes of 4 00:00:09,280 --> 00:00:13,440 endless parties and chaos. The ultimate good time comes 5 00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:16,880 from connection, service, and a little bit of carefree 6 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,280 timelessness. We're going to share why hitting 7 00:00:19,280 --> 00:00:22,880 the road, helping others, and slowing down to actually enjoy 8 00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:26,280 the moment will leave you feeling refreshed, inspired, and 9 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:30,040 maybe even a little holy. Some would say buckle up. 10 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:49,560 This is the All In podcast. All right, gentlemen, we have 11 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:54,280 each individually braked during spring back in our day. 12 00:00:54,920 --> 00:00:59,080 I'd love to to hear from each of you some of your favorite spring 13 00:00:59,080 --> 00:01:04,360 break. Experiences hands down, not even 14 00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:10,160 close, sitting with Clayton Ward Caldwell on the white sandy 15 00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:14,320 beaches of Kingston, Jamaica in 2015. 16 00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:18,400 So the, the situation was we went on a mission trip to 17 00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:21,440 Kingston, Jamaica. Amazing, amazing experience. 18 00:01:21,640 --> 00:01:25,240 It was an all men's trip because the place we were going was, 19 00:01:25,560 --> 00:01:28,440 yeah, somewhat difficult. The, the service we were doing 20 00:01:28,680 --> 00:01:31,080 involved a certain amount of manual labor strength. 21 00:01:31,640 --> 00:01:34,560 And so our missionary John, good friend of ours, took us down to 22 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:36,840 Kingston. I'll never forget, we get off 23 00:01:36,840 --> 00:01:40,040 the airport in Kingston and we're waiting for the car and 24 00:01:40,040 --> 00:01:41,560 I'm like, oh, you know, they probably got Ubers here. 25 00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:45,920 It's not an Uber. It's an open flatbed truck that 26 00:01:45,920 --> 00:01:47,880 looked like it was probably used to move cattle. 27 00:01:48,480 --> 00:01:50,120 And they pull up. I'm like, there's no way. 28 00:01:50,520 --> 00:01:53,080 Sure enough, the brother who we're working with goes, all 29 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:56,320 right, hop in boys, and we hop in the bed of an open air truck. 30 00:01:56,320 --> 00:01:58,640 And that just kind of dictated what the whole experience was 31 00:01:58,640 --> 00:02:01,000 going to be like. So we served the poor for six 32 00:02:01,000 --> 00:02:04,440 days, really powerful in in the poorest of the poor slums of 33 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:06,880 Kingston, Jamaica. And then the highlight for me, 34 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:09,560 which is a great example of just the beauty of good fellowship, 35 00:02:09,759 --> 00:02:11,280 is we serve the poor for six days. 36 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:14,000 And then on the last day we celebrated and we went out to 37 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,560 the beach. The funny part was it was March 38 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:20,360 so none of us had a bass tan and it was also Jamaica so they 39 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:24,480 don't sell sunscreen. Me and Clayton got the worst 40 00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:28,160 sunburns of our entire life on the beach for six hours, no 41 00:02:28,160 --> 00:02:32,320 sunscreen, pasty white, and the next two weeks I couldn't wear a 42 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:38,120 backpack. I remember being so jealous of 43 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:42,160 this trip that you guys went on. So it was our freshman year, we 44 00:02:42,160 --> 00:02:44,640 were on the same Bible study and I remember hearing the pitch for 45 00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:47,400 this mission trip. I was like, why would I want to 46 00:02:47,680 --> 00:02:49,600 go on a mission? Trip, you were scared, weren't 47 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:50,520 you? You were scared. 48 00:02:50,880 --> 00:02:54,160 I was scared of you. It's a recurring theme on the 49 00:02:54,280 --> 00:02:57,160 show. No, I just remember thinking 50 00:02:57,160 --> 00:03:03,800 like, why would I want to go do something for other people, you 51 00:03:03,840 --> 00:03:07,880 know, And so I, I went on AI want a trip with some other 52 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:09,480 friends. We we took a big road trip to 53 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,560 Colorado and it was wonderful. It was a great trip. 54 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:16,400 And I remember thinking like those sons of guns have are 55 00:03:16,400 --> 00:03:18,720 having probably like a horrible experience, like we're going to 56 00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:21,440 get back and I'm going to be telling about what a great time 57 00:03:21,440 --> 00:03:24,960 I had in Colorado. We went skiing, hiking, we went 58 00:03:24,960 --> 00:03:27,800 up the the big staircase in Colorado Springs. 59 00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:29,280 The Manitou Incline. Oh yeah. 60 00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:33,760 Like we did, I did all these cool things, you know, and sure 61 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:38,160 enough, I get back and I just keep hearing stories and stories 62 00:03:38,160 --> 00:03:41,760 about this trip. And I was like, man, I really 63 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:46,080 missed out. And so for the next 4 years, I 64 00:03:46,080 --> 00:03:47,800 went on a collective 0 mission trips. 65 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:54,800 But it did definitely impact some of the mission trips I, I 66 00:03:54,800 --> 00:03:58,400 lived through with, with some of my students whenever I was on 67 00:03:58,400 --> 00:04:02,640 campus as a missionary. And sometimes it was mission 68 00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:04,320 trips. I want a handful of mission 69 00:04:04,320 --> 00:04:08,920 trips during that time. But what I the most memorable 70 00:04:08,920 --> 00:04:12,640 for me? We called it our mission trip to 71 00:04:12,640 --> 00:04:16,680 Myrtle Beach. Gotta go save the sea turtles I. 72 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:18,720 Took The Dirty Myrtle. The Dirty Myrtle. 73 00:04:18,760 --> 00:04:24,360 Yeah, I took a group of it was like 6 or or 7 seniors to Myrtle 74 00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:26,640 Beach and we used to have the time of our lives. 75 00:04:26,640 --> 00:04:29,480 It was so fun. We we went to the beach. 76 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:32,640 Obviously we played golf at all these different Myrtle Beach 77 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:33,800 courses. That was super fun. 78 00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:36,240 This was like my first time ever playing golf. 79 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:38,960 And so I'm bad now, but I was even worse than. 80 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:43,040 But we did that. We went to medieval times. 81 00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:45,680 No way. It was so funny. 82 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:47,520 A bunch of dudes. Oh, we got so many pictures. 83 00:04:47,520 --> 00:04:50,600 We, we, we crowned one of our faithful listeners Dirty Josh's. 84 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:54,160 We, we got him to be the the king of medieval times, and we 85 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:56,200 got him a picture with the queen at the end of it. 86 00:04:56,200 --> 00:04:57,840 We, we just have the time of our lives. 87 00:04:58,000 --> 00:04:59,680 That would be a great bachelor party. 88 00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:03,080 Bit is, get dressed up like medieval characters and go to 89 00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:05,920 medieval times, have a couple beers in the parking lot, 90 00:05:05,920 --> 00:05:10,320 tailgated a little bit and then just go RIP some Turkey legs. 91 00:05:10,880 --> 00:05:14,400 It was amazing, like a Turkey legs hit just right, you know, 92 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,080 and we bring so loud and obnoxious. 93 00:05:16,080 --> 00:05:17,920 It was so fun. It was a time of our, of our 94 00:05:17,920 --> 00:05:19,880 lives. You know, I, I'm, I'm going to 95 00:05:19,880 --> 00:05:21,800 piggyback off of John Michael here a little bit. 96 00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:23,840 When I think of all the spring breaks that went on, I think 97 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:26,240 going to Kingston, Jamaica was one of the most memorable. 98 00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:29,280 And I think one of the best things about that spring break 99 00:05:29,280 --> 00:05:32,040 going on mission trip was that one of the things that they do 100 00:05:32,040 --> 00:05:35,040 on the trips is that you don't, you don't have your your phone. 101 00:05:35,560 --> 00:05:38,640 And so, and you also don't really know the schedule until 102 00:05:38,640 --> 00:05:40,920 the day off. And so you're just going 103 00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:43,760 throughout, you know, the six or seven days while we're in 104 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:45,800 Jamaica and you don't really know what's going to happen that 105 00:05:45,800 --> 00:05:48,840 day until it happens. But I think one of my all time 106 00:05:48,840 --> 00:05:51,000 favorite memories from Michael, you're going to remember this is 107 00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:55,760 when we played soccer with all of the the local Jamaican kids 108 00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:58,000 that was getting. Megged by a five year. 109 00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:00,400 Old, far better than me. I mean, these are literally like 110 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:02,960 8 or 9 year old kids and we're playing. 111 00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:04,520 It was just like, it was literally just like a dirt 112 00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:06,680 field. And I'm like, you know, they had 113 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:08,320 goals, but they didn't have Nets behind the goals. 114 00:06:08,720 --> 00:06:12,640 And I was just getting destroyed so much that I, I, I had fall 115 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:16,520 fallen a couple of times because I'd lost my footing and my, my 116 00:06:16,520 --> 00:06:20,040 ASICS that I brought on the mission trip. 117 00:06:20,040 --> 00:06:23,520 And I just remember both of my knees being completely bloodied 118 00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:25,640 up as a it. Was so funny. 119 00:06:25,640 --> 00:06:28,320 He's like running down the field, limping. 120 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:29,880 He's got blood pouring down his legs. 121 00:06:29,880 --> 00:06:33,840 And was like, Clayton, just stop playing like we can't have you 122 00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:37,040 injured in, you know, Kingston, Jamaica. 123 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:40,440 And he just kept going, took the blood, wiped it as eye black on 124 00:06:40,440 --> 00:06:44,680 his eyes and we were rolling. Jose, it sounds like you went on 125 00:06:45,000 --> 00:06:47,160 probably a couple Great Rd. trips. 126 00:06:47,320 --> 00:06:51,000 What is it about the road trip on spring break that's so 127 00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:52,480 special? I mean, you could, you could 128 00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:55,360 make the choice to fly, you know, invest that little extra 129 00:06:55,360 --> 00:06:57,560 money or maybe use points. But there's something about 130 00:06:57,560 --> 00:07:00,640 doing a road trip that just makes a trip like that more 131 00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:01,600 special. Why do you think? 132 00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:07,960 That is, I think that my 2 initial thoughts are suffering 133 00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:13,280 and being trapped, right? I think there's, there's 134 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:16,800 something fun about the the night before. 135 00:07:16,880 --> 00:07:19,120 You know, everyone says like, hey, when are we getting up? 136 00:07:19,120 --> 00:07:20,920 When are we leaving? And it's always the responsible 137 00:07:20,920 --> 00:07:22,360 one. That's like, all right, everyone 138 00:07:22,360 --> 00:07:25,800 be ready by 4:00 AM and everyone's mad at him. 139 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:28,320 And then at 7:00 AM and you get in the car. 140 00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:32,160 It's like everyone gets in the car and everyone's miserable. 141 00:07:32,600 --> 00:07:35,760 Just sleep deprived, you know, hungry. 142 00:07:36,520 --> 00:07:38,640 Do we want coffee now? Do we want to save it for a 143 00:07:38,640 --> 00:07:41,160 little bit down the road? I think that's suffering. 144 00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:44,520 Then as the road trip goes on, you know, your legs start 145 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:46,600 getting achy, start getting a little stir crazy. 146 00:07:46,680 --> 00:07:48,880 That's part of it, like doing something like that together. 147 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:51,480 But the other part is like you're just in a car together 148 00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:56,880 for such a long time that I just feel like you have no other 149 00:07:56,880 --> 00:08:01,320 option but the connect. And it's like when when I think 150 00:08:01,320 --> 00:08:04,640 of conversations, sometimes things come up and it's like 151 00:08:06,120 --> 00:08:09,680 navigating conversation can be like navigating like a road 152 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:11,800 trip. And there are all these off 153 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:14,240 ramps that you could take. But, you know, if you're just at 154 00:08:14,240 --> 00:08:18,880 the office or in college between classes having conversation, 155 00:08:18,880 --> 00:08:21,200 you're like, OK, I don't have the time to explore all these 156 00:08:21,200 --> 00:08:23,160 off ramps. But on a road trip, you're like, 157 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:24,200 I got nothing better. Dude. 158 00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:27,840 Let's get off every single exit. And let me just ask all these 159 00:08:27,840 --> 00:08:31,280 questions that I would not hear about in any other scenario than 160 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:33,679 during this road trip. I would say there's like 3 161 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:39,120 stages of a road trip, so stage 1 is what I call like the rager 162 00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:41,640 stage. You get in the car, everyone's 163 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:45,320 up early there, it's early and the music is on full blast. 164 00:08:45,320 --> 00:08:48,600 Sun's not up. You were screaming Blink 182 for 165 00:08:48,600 --> 00:08:50,800 an hour straight. You put on Eric Church 166 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:53,280 Springsteen. The windows are rolled down. 167 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:54,840 You're having the time of your life. 168 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:58,360 Say the first phase hour 2 hours, 3 hours Max. 169 00:08:59,480 --> 00:09:02,200 Then you move to the second stage and that is the I want to 170 00:09:02,200 --> 00:09:05,120 Kill You stage where you're 3 hours in. 171 00:09:05,120 --> 00:09:08,640 The guy next to you is just driving you crazy because he's 172 00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:11,920 man spreading. He's got his, his legs totally 173 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:14,240 spread out to where you have no leg room anymore. 174 00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:17,640 And that stage lasts like one, maybe two hours. 175 00:09:17,640 --> 00:09:20,920 And everyone's just kind of quiet but resentful of the guy 176 00:09:20,920 --> 00:09:23,440 next to him. And then you enter the golden 177 00:09:23,440 --> 00:09:27,640 hour of a road trip stage #3 which is the low key. 178 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,800 Maybe there's some light Gregory Allen Eisenkopf playing in the 179 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:32,680 background. You, you kind. 180 00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:35,760 Of lose control of the ox. Lose control of the ox. 181 00:09:35,760 --> 00:09:37,360 Because you're so into that conversation. 182 00:09:37,360 --> 00:09:39,760 You're so into it and and that's the point of the road trip where 183 00:09:39,760 --> 00:09:41,440 you just have those powerful conversations. 184 00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:45,080 So it's like stage 1 rager, Stage 2, I want to kill you. 185 00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:49,480 Stage 3 powerful conversation. And I also think in another, 186 00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:55,320 it's kind of forgotten part of the road trip is things that you 187 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:57,160 normally wouldn't find that funny. 188 00:09:58,120 --> 00:10:02,040 Oh, absolutely. Six hours in the delirious. 189 00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:03,920 State delirious. State, which is like the 190 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:05,320 smallest thing. I don't know if you guys were 191 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:06,520 in. We took a road trip, I think it 192 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:08,120 was our senior college at Kansas City. 193 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:13,680 And there was one point where we stopped at a gas station and one 194 00:10:13,680 --> 00:10:17,120 of the people we were with just got like snacks that none of us 195 00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:18,840 would normally get. And we thought. 196 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:21,440 It was hell there. Was it Corn Nuts? 197 00:10:22,160 --> 00:10:27,040 No, it was I, it was like cornats, a banana, a protein bar 198 00:10:27,040 --> 00:10:29,720 and like Muscle Milk, it is a combination. 199 00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:33,920 It's like it's not that funny. But in the moment we we could 200 00:10:33,920 --> 00:10:37,320 not stop roasting this guy. I remember another one, John 201 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:38,720 Michael. We were Rd. tripping to Auburn 202 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:41,320 for a football game and I just remember I was in the front 203 00:10:41,320 --> 00:10:41,920 seat. I wasn't. 204 00:10:41,920 --> 00:10:44,000 I wasn't driving, but I looked behind me and John Michaels 205 00:10:44,000 --> 00:10:46,640 sound asleep with a McDonald's bag over his head. 206 00:10:47,240 --> 00:10:50,280 It's still it's greasy from the Mcmuffins that were in there 207 00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:53,160 earlier and the hash Browns just over his head with the eye holes 208 00:10:53,160 --> 00:10:56,440 poked out. Just absolutely sound asleep. 209 00:10:57,480 --> 00:11:01,440 I another funny memory and I also do feel like in Richard's 210 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:05,480 funny things happen. This was I I took a trip to Ole 211 00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:09,520 Miss with our missionary Alec and I, I remember we stopped in 212 00:11:09,520 --> 00:11:12,040 Shreveport, which is a dangerous place to stop in general. 213 00:11:12,520 --> 00:11:15,080 We stopped. It was late at night. 214 00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:17,120 This is one of those Rd. trips that we we had to leave like 215 00:11:17,120 --> 00:11:19,280 after class on Thursday probably. 216 00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:25,800 And someone approaches. It is like you guys like music. 217 00:11:27,160 --> 00:11:29,000 That was introduction. That was the start. 218 00:11:29,000 --> 00:11:30,920 I was like, whoa, where'd you come from? 219 00:11:30,920 --> 00:11:33,880 You know, So you guys like music? 220 00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:37,480 I'm like, yeah, yeah, we love music and you guys. 221 00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:40,400 All right, let me know what y'all think. 222 00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:44,600 Hands ACD with like nothing on it, just a blank CD and like 223 00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:47,520 walks away like it like disappears into the night. 224 00:11:48,240 --> 00:11:50,320 And it was just he gave us his mix tape. 225 00:11:50,640 --> 00:11:53,800 It was some of the most awful music I've ever heard. 226 00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:56,880 Well, how can I put it on? And I don't think we lasted half 227 00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:58,800 a song. Was it, what was it, country? 228 00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:00,240 Rap. It was a rap mix tape. 229 00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:02,320 It was the worst thing. But Alec and I were just 230 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:04,680 laughing so much of like, what do you mean? 231 00:12:04,680 --> 00:12:06,360 Let us, let me know what y'all think. 232 00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:10,440 Like a constant wait around that this gas station, will you? 233 00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:13,480 A beer out of the darkness again to give him a note. 234 00:12:13,480 --> 00:12:14,720 Hey, that was really good. Yeah. 235 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:17,840 You know, there's, there's something about going on a road 236 00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:20,840 trip that just creates space for a friendship. 237 00:12:20,960 --> 00:12:23,040 Like you're saying, Jose, you said you're just kind of stuck 238 00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:24,400 in the car. Like you're saying, you go 239 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:27,280 through these different phases. You're, you experience a lot of 240 00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:28,280 life while you're on a road trip. 241 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:31,560 Why do you why do you think we it's important for us to create 242 00:12:31,560 --> 00:12:34,480 that space in order for us to have those deeper connection 243 00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:35,800 moments and, and friendships? And why? 244 00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:38,160 Why is the road trip an an essential part of that? 245 00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:42,480 So we talked about this in a in an earlier episode of the All In 246 00:12:42,480 --> 00:12:47,600 podcast, the art of conversation and how guys don't do well when 247 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:51,880 they're across from another man. In terms of conversation, the 248 00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:54,480 road trip is perfect because you're not looking at each other 249 00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:56,320 unless you're in one of those cool. 250 00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:59,400 Remember those old school Volvos where there was a seat facing 251 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,160 the back of the car? Like the bucket seats? 252 00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,440 Could turn and they could turn just incredible cars. 253 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:07,640 But you know, generally you're not looking at the guy next to 254 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:08,960 you. You're just staring ahead at the 255 00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:11,280 open road. And there's something about that 256 00:13:11,280 --> 00:13:14,680 where the mind starts running, the words start flowing, the 257 00:13:14,680 --> 00:13:17,760 emotions start bubbling to the surface, maybe some emotions 258 00:13:17,760 --> 00:13:19,640 that you've been shoving down for a lot of years. 259 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:23,000 And I think it's that that shared experience of looking at 260 00:13:23,400 --> 00:13:26,360 common object being the road and it just, your mind's not 261 00:13:26,360 --> 00:13:28,960 necessarily on the conversation and it just flows. 262 00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:34,120 It just flows. The best two I I think, is when 263 00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:39,040 I feel like in every single road trip I was on in college at one 264 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:41,800 point or another, we talked about girls. 265 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:46,480 Oh yeah. Dating and breakups and it the 266 00:13:46,520 --> 00:13:49,600 egg, it described a lot of what you're describing of. 267 00:13:49,880 --> 00:13:52,120 So there's one guy that, you know, was just looking out the 268 00:13:52,120 --> 00:13:54,320 window as they were talking, was looking at the windshield, you 269 00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:57,480 know, at the open Rd. maybe getting a little teary eyed, you 270 00:13:57,480 --> 00:14:00,600 know, if it's a breakup or just like getting like blushing a 271 00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:01,880 little bit if it's someone they like. 272 00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:04,480 But it's just, yeah, you don't look at each other. 273 00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:06,240 You're just looking at something else. 274 00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:09,400 And it's quiet. And then he randomly goes, so do 275 00:14:09,400 --> 00:14:12,280 you think I should marry her? And it's like you're not even 276 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:18,120 dating who? So I would argue that the best 277 00:14:18,480 --> 00:14:21,160 seat on the road trip is obviously shotgun. 278 00:14:21,840 --> 00:14:24,040 But the reason that I say that is not because it's shotgun and 279 00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:26,400 obviously you have a seat to yourself and you're not driving. 280 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:29,080 I would say that it's the best seat because when you're in the 281 00:14:29,080 --> 00:14:31,320 back, you don't have any responsibilities. 282 00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:35,160 You can fall asleep, you can look at your phone, you can do 283 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,200 you can have a conversation, you can just kind of do whatever you 284 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,320 want. The persons that that is driving 285 00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:41,720 obviously has to keep their eyes on the road and drive and you 286 00:14:41,720 --> 00:14:44,840 can have some some light music on, you know, but then the 287 00:14:44,880 --> 00:14:46,200 what's the you guys all know this. 288 00:14:46,200 --> 00:14:48,400 This is like man rule. What's the the person in 289 00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:50,240 shotgun? What's their responsibility on a 290 00:14:50,240 --> 00:14:53,560 road trip? Navigation Music. 291 00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:55,800 Yep. Inspiration. 292 00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:57,880 Sure, the other person's awake. That's what I was gonna say is, 293 00:14:57,880 --> 00:15:00,040 is, is making sure that the other person is awake. 294 00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:03,200 Your job is to be there with the person that's driving the car. 295 00:15:03,200 --> 00:15:06,000 And I would argue that the best conversations happen when you're 296 00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,840 sitting shotgun in the car. Do you agree? 297 00:15:08,520 --> 00:15:13,600 Without a doubt, and I would elevate that to even putting a 298 00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:15,920 time stamp on it. The graveyard shift in the 299 00:15:15,920 --> 00:15:17,920 shotgun is best conversation, yes. 300 00:15:17,920 --> 00:15:20,280 Everyone else is asleep you. Can kind of gossip about the 301 00:15:20,280 --> 00:15:24,280 people behind you and they're asleep so they don't know. 302 00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:27,800 But when it's dark, you you you stopped at McDonald's, grabbed a 303 00:15:27,800 --> 00:15:31,520 little MC MC Cafe coffee and it's just rolling. 304 00:15:31,520 --> 00:15:35,120 It's dark outside. It's, I don't know, kind of 305 00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:38,320 emotional. Like I like music when you're 306 00:15:38,320 --> 00:15:42,560 having a deep conversation, like some lo fi instrumentals, even 307 00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:45,160 good Interstellar Hans Zimmer soundtrack. 308 00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:48,720 Boom, very good. You know, the thing about a road 309 00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:51,120 trip is that eventually the road trip ends. 310 00:15:51,120 --> 00:15:53,640 And for the purposes of this podcast, we're talking about 311 00:15:53,840 --> 00:15:56,200 spring break. So we're going to take a break 312 00:15:56,200 --> 00:15:58,680 real quick and we'll be right back after this. 313 00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:02,680 Hey, this is Clayton from the All In podcast. 314 00:16:02,960 --> 00:16:05,640 What if I told you that God was moving in places that you've 315 00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:08,840 never even imagined? That's exactly what you'll see 316 00:16:08,840 --> 00:16:12,440 in the new series Where Love Leads, a 5 episode miniseries 317 00:16:12,440 --> 00:16:15,680 brought to you by Focus. Travel with us across the world 318 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:19,080 to see people whose lives have been transformed by Christ and 319 00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:20,520 see the power of mission come alive. 320 00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:25,120 Tap the link or scan the QR code to watch Where Love Leads now in 321 00:16:25,120 --> 00:16:32,160 the Secret Play app. All right, so you guys just 322 00:16:32,160 --> 00:16:36,600 drove 15 hours in the car, You're at a beach somewhere, 323 00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:38,600 maybe you're in the mountains, I don't really know. 324 00:16:38,880 --> 00:16:40,720 I'd love to hear. Some of us went on mission trips 325 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:43,600 in college. Some of us did Rd. trips today. 326 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:47,840 How would you describe your ideal spring break vacation? 327 00:16:49,480 --> 00:16:52,400 Are we talking with families? Are we still single? 328 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:55,920 You're, you're in college, college, you're in college and 329 00:16:55,920 --> 00:16:57,120 you've got to plan a spring break. 330 00:16:57,320 --> 00:16:58,960 What it what are you doing? What does it look like? 331 00:17:00,760 --> 00:17:05,119 So the first and most critical element is your team. 332 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:10,400 Who are you going with? Because you have some dudes in 333 00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:14,680 your life who you love to death, but you do not want to travel 334 00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:16,680 with them. We all have that guy in our 335 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:18,680 life. I'm I'm looking at you, brother 336 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:22,000 Peter, who you're just like, I don't want to travel. 337 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:25,160 With that guy. He's going to be a Debbie 338 00:17:25,160 --> 00:17:27,119 Downer, so who you bring is most important. 339 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:31,000 You need to make sure 5-6 guys. I would put the magic number 340 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:35,840 somewhere in that 5 to 6 range. Three too much because two guys 341 00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:39,160 get along really well. One guy's kind of left out more 342 00:17:39,160 --> 00:17:41,200 than 6. Now you're in a situation where 343 00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,600 we need a minivan. I don't know if we can afford 344 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:45,280 that. So 5's the perfect. 345 00:17:45,280 --> 00:17:48,120 You can do a sedan, you can do a crossover SUV. 346 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:51,560 Any size car is going to work. There's also enough guys to 347 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,680 split the drive time up with. So your team's most important 348 00:17:54,040 --> 00:17:55,840 number, 2 is your destination. Where you going? 349 00:17:56,760 --> 00:17:58,840 I think there's there's there's two arguments here. 350 00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:02,000 There's your beach guys and then there's your mountain guys, and 351 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,840 then there's kind of the guys in between that want to do the 352 00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:07,280 California we're going to hit LA and Yosemite in the same round. 353 00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:12,600 Really smart little 2 Fer I I love the mountains. 354 00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:15,240 Frankly, some people might disagree with me here, but 355 00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:18,640 living in Colorado, I love doing stuff together, having some 356 00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:21,440 physical activity and then having some chill time back at 357 00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:24,880 the Airbnb or at the hotel to where you do something physical, 358 00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:28,760 come back, take a nap, 3:00 PM, cook some dinner, have some good 359 00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:31,360 conversation, play a little poker, take everybody's money, 360 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:33,800 go all in. And then after that, you always 361 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:36,360 got to think about, is there a person? 362 00:18:36,360 --> 00:18:37,760 Is there a thing that you want to visit? 363 00:18:38,000 --> 00:18:41,920 Because they're kind of like 1, you know, one kind of point in 364 00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:43,560 the trip that's like the highlight of the trip. 365 00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:47,160 Maybe it's bagging a 14 or maybe it's like hitting the certain 366 00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:48,880 church or something. Maybe it's seeing a friend that 367 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,320 you haven't seen a while on the road trip. 368 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,880 I think those are kind of your your three, your team, your 369 00:18:52,880 --> 00:18:54,640 destination. And then you got to have the 370 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:56,520 high point, the mountaintop experience on the trip. 371 00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:59,320 Yeah. Jose. 372 00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:05,160 I, I would agree with that. I, I for starting the 373 00:19:05,160 --> 00:19:08,960 destination, I think you can make the beach fun, right? 374 00:19:08,960 --> 00:19:11,960 I, I just spoke early in this episode about going to the 375 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:16,520 beach, but frankly, I think we spent maybe a total of 4 hours 376 00:19:16,640 --> 00:19:21,200 on an actual beach. What there were a lot of 377 00:19:21,320 --> 00:19:27,360 medieval times every night. No, we, we were just doing 378 00:19:27,360 --> 00:19:28,680 things. And I agree with John and, and I 379 00:19:28,680 --> 00:19:32,080 think mountains just make that a little easier to do things, to 380 00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:34,240 do physical things. Now you can't do that at the 381 00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:35,880 beach. And, and we had a great time and 382 00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:37,880 I think it's still awesome to do that. 383 00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:42,200 But at least for me, when I think of spring break, I think 384 00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:43,840 of skiing, I think of the mountains. 385 00:19:43,880 --> 00:19:49,000 I think of that summertime is when I think of the beach and I 386 00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:53,520 agree with with with the group. I and one thing you didn't add, 387 00:19:53,520 --> 00:19:57,240 which I think is crucial to every group you you need a 388 00:19:57,240 --> 00:20:02,160 responsible person. You need a glue guy, right? 389 00:20:02,160 --> 00:20:04,200 When things get feisty, you need that one person that's going to 390 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:08,760 bring everyone back You need. You need the mysterious guy. 391 00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:12,560 The guy that not most of the people on the trip don't know 392 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:15,080 that well. That's such a great take. 393 00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:18,120 Because it adds so much, you know, as you get to, you get to 394 00:20:18,120 --> 00:20:23,040 discover this person as a group. That is a great point you need. 395 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:26,560 The chiller. And then you need the kind of 396 00:20:26,560 --> 00:20:28,760 crazy one, the one that's like, hey, let's go do this. 397 00:20:29,240 --> 00:20:31,560 Hey, no, we're going to go to LA and we're going. 398 00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:33,000 To go to. You're 70, Yeah. 399 00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:35,160 Or hey, what? Let's, let's, let's go skiing 400 00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:38,840 six days in a row, you know, from 8:00 AM to to 2:00 PM and 401 00:20:38,840 --> 00:20:40,280 then we're in. Come back, take a quick break 402 00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:41,600 and. Then we're going to ski around 403 00:20:41,600 --> 00:20:43,600 shirtless and I'm going to be the one to lead the charge. 404 00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,640 Because you need someone to get everyone out of the comfort 405 00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:47,440 zone. Can I add one guy? 406 00:20:48,240 --> 00:20:52,280 You need the rich guy. You need the guy whose parents 407 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:54,200 are loaded and they gave him the credit card. 408 00:20:54,480 --> 00:20:56,600 And so he's like, yeah, I'll cover it. 409 00:20:56,680 --> 00:20:58,640 You don't. Need it, but it's nice to. 410 00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:01,360 I mean, let's be honest, there's a lot of reasons why certain 411 00:21:01,360 --> 00:21:02,800 people were invited on certain trips. 412 00:21:03,000 --> 00:21:05,560 It's not because he liked them. It was because because you knew 413 00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:07,480 at the end of the day they were going to pick up the bill when 414 00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:09,760 it came push to shove. You know, I would argue that 415 00:21:09,760 --> 00:21:12,240 there's another Spring break character, or maybe just even a 416 00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:14,160 character in a friend group, which is the Wanderer. 417 00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:17,440 You know, that person that you just never really know where he 418 00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:17,720 went. A. 419 00:21:17,840 --> 00:21:19,400 Little Spacey. He's a little Spacey. 420 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:22,160 He just kind of went off. Where did he go? 421 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:26,440 Where did that guy go? Where's Drew? 422 00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,280 Yeah. I so you guys said mountains. 423 00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:32,280 I would 100% say beach every single time. 424 00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:35,320 And the reason for that is because there's something about 425 00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,120 the beat. Like I, I don't necessarily just 426 00:21:38,120 --> 00:21:40,120 want to go on a trip just to go do something. 427 00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:42,840 Like I would argue that when you go to the beach, you can have a 428 00:21:42,840 --> 00:21:44,400 variety of different experiences. 429 00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:46,520 You know, you have, you go to the beach, it's more versatile. 430 00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:48,080 It's more versatile. You have, you have a great time. 431 00:21:48,080 --> 00:21:50,680 You can kind of lounge around you hang out, you have a couple 432 00:21:50,680 --> 00:21:52,280 beers. You get out in the water, you're 433 00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:54,160 playing, you know, different beach games. 434 00:21:54,160 --> 00:21:56,200 You're playing loud music. Then you fall asleep, you take a 435 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,600 nap. Then you go back to, you know, 436 00:21:58,600 --> 00:21:59,640 the house that you're in or whatever. 437 00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:01,680 You shower up, you go get a nice dinner. 438 00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:04,040 Then you come back to the house, you can watch a movie. 439 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:08,400 You can. There is nothing better than 440 00:22:08,800 --> 00:22:14,560 going out to dinner after showering and napping and your 441 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:18,120 skins a little tight from being sunburnt and being under the sun 442 00:22:18,120 --> 00:22:20,600 all day. That meal is just always the 443 00:22:20,600 --> 00:22:24,600 most absolutely glorious food that you can put in your body. 444 00:22:25,120 --> 00:22:27,440 You feel, you feel like really good looking too. 445 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,720 Yeah, 'cause the the sea salt, the sea salts in your hair you 446 00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,120 like. Do you like undo one of the like 447 00:22:33,120 --> 00:22:35,600 an extra button that you would never undo back home? 448 00:22:36,000 --> 00:22:39,120 The only socially acceptable place to have a a shirt that's 449 00:22:39,120 --> 00:22:41,640 only halfway buttoned, yeah, is beach dinner. 450 00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:45,720 I think, you know, in, in our in, in modern culture that, you 451 00:22:45,720 --> 00:22:49,440 know, kind of idealizes the the spring break beach trip. 452 00:22:50,040 --> 00:22:52,520 We just go out, you drink a ton, you have a good time, you know, 453 00:22:52,560 --> 00:22:54,800 you're you're not really you're not really there. 454 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:57,880 You're just, you're just there honestly to to drink, you know, 455 00:22:57,880 --> 00:22:59,640 and to just kind of escape for a little bit. 456 00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:05,640 I think what a a spring break trip like that misses is the 457 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,440 opportunity for connection. And I would argue that when a 458 00:23:09,440 --> 00:23:15,840 good spring break has one of two things, one connection with the 459 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:17,720 group that you're in. And so it's, it's really easy. 460 00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,560 I mean, we're, we're talking about what makes for a good road 461 00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:20,600 trip. You could still go on a road 462 00:23:20,600 --> 00:23:22,080 trip and everyone be on the fence. 463 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:25,360 You can still go to the beach or go to the mountains, you know, 464 00:23:25,400 --> 00:23:29,600 and, and not create a space for people to connect with one, one 465 00:23:29,600 --> 00:23:31,280 another. If you're just going on a spring 466 00:23:31,280 --> 00:23:35,360 break trip to, to to drink or to escape, you're not really, you 467 00:23:35,360 --> 00:23:37,600 know, filling your cup. There's not really like a reset 468 00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:39,760 that happens, You know, there's not like a refresher that 469 00:23:39,760 --> 00:23:42,080 happens on the trip. The other thing that I would say 470 00:23:42,080 --> 00:23:45,680 makes for a, a good trip is really an opportunity for, for 471 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:47,440 service. And the reason I say that is 472 00:23:47,440 --> 00:23:50,240 because when you're with the mission trip experience that we 473 00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:52,560 had in college was that, yeah, like you're, you're doing 474 00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:55,280 something hard, but you're also doing something hard with a 475 00:23:55,280 --> 00:23:57,960 group of people, you know, and it, and it creates a shared 476 00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:00,480 experience of something that's difficult and you're and you're 477 00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:03,760 pursuing some good together. So I want to, I want to tackle 478 00:24:03,760 --> 00:24:05,280 that a little bit. Is that what is it? 479 00:24:05,280 --> 00:24:09,400 What does it look like to find purpose, even, you know, in the 480 00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:11,960 midst of of play, if you will, while you're having a good time? 481 00:24:13,240 --> 00:24:14,440 Well, I think there's there's two ways. 482 00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:19,160 One, you go on a trip that's inherently purposeful, like a 483 00:24:19,160 --> 00:24:24,560 mission trip, like even even a trip like 11 spring break in 484 00:24:24,560 --> 00:24:28,640 college, I went fly fishing with my dad and it was, you know, the 485 00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:31,640 purpose was not to fly fish. The purpose was to spend quality 486 00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,480 time together. It was our last spring break 487 00:24:34,480 --> 00:24:37,080 before I got married. I just gotten engaged that year. 488 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:41,200 And so my dad and I and my brother were like, hey, let's do 489 00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:45,720 kind of one last boys trip before JM gets married. 490 00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:49,960 And so the purpose was not necessarily found in the type of 491 00:24:49,960 --> 00:24:52,960 trip fly fishing. We had a great time, went out on 492 00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:55,440 the river, had some beers, had some nice dinners. 493 00:24:56,680 --> 00:24:59,600 But the purpose was inherently meaningful, which is that we're 494 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:03,080 here to celebrate this reality that our life is going to look 495 00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:05,200 different after this. And I think about me and 496 00:25:05,200 --> 00:25:07,040 Clayton. We went on a road trip one time 497 00:25:07,040 --> 00:25:09,760 together right before he got married and right before I had 498 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:12,040 my first kid. And we went and did some fun 499 00:25:12,040 --> 00:25:13,400 stuff. We went white water rafting, 500 00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:15,720 went and hikes, mountains, went camping, the worst night of 501 00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:20,120 camping of our lives, actually. But the purpose of the trip was 502 00:25:20,120 --> 00:25:23,680 to spend time together for the last time before our lives 503 00:25:23,680 --> 00:25:26,040 changed. And so the, the trip doesn't 504 00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:31,160 have to be purposeful in its direction, but you can take a 505 00:25:31,160 --> 00:25:34,160 trip that's fun and turn it into inherently meaningful. 506 00:25:34,440 --> 00:25:36,320 Then there's the flip side, which is like the trip itself is 507 00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:38,520 purposeful. Mission trip's a great example. 508 00:25:39,880 --> 00:25:42,600 Or, or spending time. I know a lot of folks like to do 509 00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:45,640 like a little retreat, for example, over spring break or 510 00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:48,600 even adults, you know, take a, take a family trip where you're 511 00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:51,680 taking time out of the, the craziness of life to go spend a 512 00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:53,800 little dedicated retreat time as a family. 513 00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:57,400 And so those are purposeful in in that the trip itself has 514 00:25:57,400 --> 00:26:01,600 inherent goodness behind it. Yeah. 515 00:26:04,160 --> 00:26:06,000 Yeah, I would agree. I think another, I think you 516 00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,800 bring up an interesting point, John Michael, the reason that 517 00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:10,240 you went on that trip with your dad and with your brothers 518 00:26:10,240 --> 00:26:12,920 because you recognize that something in your life was 519 00:26:12,920 --> 00:26:14,920 changing. And I think particularly for the 520 00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:18,560 college student to recognize that frankly, your, your spring 521 00:26:18,560 --> 00:26:22,440 break, your summer break, your winter break, you're not really 522 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:25,480 going to have times like that for the rest of your life. 523 00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:28,840 Yeah, you're not going to have a month in December where you just 524 00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:31,680 get to take entirely off. You're not going to have the the 525 00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:34,760 three months over the summer that you have entirely off or 526 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:36,560 maybe you have an internship or something like that. 527 00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:39,520 And and then spring break, you'll have an opportunity for 528 00:26:39,520 --> 00:26:40,800 vacation. But your life is going to be 529 00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:43,160 inherently different. And so the question is, how do 530 00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:47,320 you make the best of that, of that opportunity while you 531 00:26:47,320 --> 00:26:52,160 still, while you still have it? I think another thing here with, 532 00:26:52,160 --> 00:26:56,320 with spring break is the idea of just carefree timelessness. 533 00:26:56,520 --> 00:26:59,040 So we talked about how, you know, when we're on the, when we 534 00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:01,520 went on this mission trip, John Michael, we, we didn't have our 535 00:27:01,520 --> 00:27:04,360 phones. We took our, we took our watches 536 00:27:04,360 --> 00:27:06,480 off. And it was just an opportunity 537 00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:08,680 to say, I don't really know what's going to happen next. 538 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:11,080 I'm just kind of here for it. You know, something, something's 539 00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:13,360 going to happen. I don't, I, I can't plan for, 540 00:27:13,360 --> 00:27:15,560 for anything else. And so it's important to create 541 00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:18,160 those opportunities and friendships where there's, you 542 00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:21,440 know, you, you have some agenda on the trip, OK, we're going to 543 00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:23,160 do this, we're going to do this, we're going to do this. 544 00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:25,920 And then there's just a bunch of unplanned time where you just 545 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:28,040 get to be with one another, right? 546 00:27:28,280 --> 00:27:30,280 Absolutely. What about? 547 00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:33,880 What about the? Guy that's, he's going on a 548 00:27:33,880 --> 00:27:37,880 trip, maybe it's spring break, maybe it's not, maybe it's just 549 00:27:37,880 --> 00:27:40,400 like you're a young adult or, you know, you're, you're in your 550 00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:44,960 30s and the boys are taking a, a golf trip, for example, where 551 00:27:46,040 --> 00:27:50,680 you're kind of the only, maybe one of the only faithful guys on 552 00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:54,000 the trip. So the trip is not like oriented 553 00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:57,520 towards, you know, we're going to pray together, we're going to 554 00:27:57,800 --> 00:28:00,640 go to Mass together, but you're, you're hanging out with these 555 00:28:00,640 --> 00:28:04,080 guys for five or six days. What do you do in that scenario? 556 00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:07,160 Because I feel like a lot of our listeners may be in that 557 00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:09,560 situation where they want to go hang out with their friends on a 558 00:28:09,560 --> 00:28:13,280 trip, but they're a little worried about if I go on that 559 00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:15,840 trip, am I going to drink too much because everybody else is 560 00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:18,280 doing that? Or am I still going to be able 561 00:28:18,280 --> 00:28:20,920 to make time for prayer even though they're not fitting that 562 00:28:20,920 --> 00:28:23,400 into our schedule? What would you tell that guy, 563 00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:27,280 Jose? You know that that can be really 564 00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,680 hard, right? Peer pressure is a real thing 565 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:31,240 that can be difficult to navigate. 566 00:28:32,240 --> 00:28:38,720 I, I want to acknowledge that, but I want to start out 567 00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:40,720 somewhere else, right? When, when you're going on a 568 00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:48,520 trip and you feel like not everyone holds same values, the 569 00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:53,520 most important thing is that you, you have to stick strong to 570 00:28:53,520 --> 00:28:56,320 your own right. But you don't want to be the guy 571 00:28:56,320 --> 00:29:00,480 that's overly pushy. These are still your friends. 572 00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:05,160 You still love them and it's good to be with them, right? 573 00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:10,360 And so you, you want to be the guy that's like, hey, I'd like, 574 00:29:10,360 --> 00:29:12,880 I'm going to wake up in the morning and, and, and make some 575 00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:14,560 time for prayer if anyone wants to join. 576 00:29:17,360 --> 00:29:19,000 But that's it. I'm not, I'm not going to, you 577 00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:22,120 know, later they'll be like, hey, Joe Michael slept in, huh? 578 00:29:22,120 --> 00:29:23,960 Yeah, yeah. What's going on? 579 00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:26,600 Right. So you you want to walk that 580 00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:30,240 line. I don't know if right now and I 581 00:29:30,240 --> 00:29:33,280 want to hear from y'all. I have something on how do you 582 00:29:33,520 --> 00:29:36,760 navigate that peer pressure? But but I think you definitely 583 00:29:36,760 --> 00:29:41,440 need to come in with a game plan of like, OK, this is I know the 584 00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:43,360 general structure of the strip, right? 585 00:29:44,120 --> 00:29:49,680 And I know maybe for the strip, right, This isn't fully how I 586 00:29:49,680 --> 00:29:52,640 ordered my life. Maybe for the strip, I, I might 587 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:56,240 have to pick between going to daily master prank, right? 588 00:29:56,240 --> 00:29:59,120 Or, or maybe it's a Monday through Friday trip and, and 589 00:29:59,680 --> 00:30:01,680 we're in a remote location and mass is kind of hard to get to. 590 00:30:01,680 --> 00:30:03,760 We only have one car and other people doing things. 591 00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:05,800 OK, So hey, I'm going to focus on, on, on. 592 00:30:05,800 --> 00:30:09,400 I want to make sure I pray 30 minutes in the morning and, and 593 00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:12,720 you have to hold strong to now. So you have to come in with that 594 00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:15,160 plan of when are you hitting those things? 595 00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:17,720 But you also want to come in with a plan of, Hey, if if you 596 00:30:17,720 --> 00:30:21,280 do struggle with peer pressure, right, if you know that your 597 00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:23,400 friends on this trip are going to get absolutely blissed. 598 00:30:24,240 --> 00:30:26,400 Yeah, you, you do have to come to the plan of like, OK, hey, 599 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:32,280 you know, yourself. Is it better to like, maybe you 600 00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:35,280 just won't drink this trip? If, if that's a real temptation 601 00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:38,880 or you come with a game plan of like, OK, I know I'm, I'm going 602 00:30:38,880 --> 00:30:41,320 to limit myself to to three drinks no matter what. 603 00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:42,640 Now that's a lot easier said than done. 604 00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:45,440 Absolutely. That that's where I would start. 605 00:30:46,000 --> 00:30:47,520 What do you think? I'm, I'm going to take a 606 00:30:47,520 --> 00:30:50,720 different angle here and just say that, you know, I, I was 607 00:30:50,720 --> 00:30:53,160 talking with a friend recently who just went on a bachelor 608 00:30:53,160 --> 00:30:57,440 party with some college friends and this particular friend's 609 00:30:57,440 --> 00:31:00,120 life looks a lot different now than it did in college. 610 00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:02,120 I think that's probably a question some people have is 611 00:31:02,120 --> 00:31:06,280 like, Hey, I have these friends that, you know, I used to live a 612 00:31:06,280 --> 00:31:09,160 different life and now I've now I've changed, but now I'm going 613 00:31:09,160 --> 00:31:12,560 on this, you know, this bachelor party and I'm still expected to 614 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:15,240 be the same guy that I was before, you know, but I've had 615 00:31:15,240 --> 00:31:17,440 this conversion and now my, my priorities are different and the 616 00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:19,640 way that I live is different. And I was talking to him about 617 00:31:19,640 --> 00:31:22,600 how he, how he handled the, the bachelor party and he said it 618 00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:25,480 was just, you know, I mean, guys were drinking, not really 619 00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:27,840 connecting with one another. It was just kind of all about, 620 00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:30,240 you know, the, the fun that could be had. 621 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,760 And so there was 1 evening where, you know, there was a 622 00:31:33,760 --> 00:31:37,160 little fire pit in the backyard. And so he went and got some 623 00:31:37,280 --> 00:31:39,840 firewood and he started a bonfire in the backyard. 624 00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:42,000 And then when all the guys were kind of done with the, you know, 625 00:31:42,000 --> 00:31:44,800 different drinking games, which, you know, he, he still 626 00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:48,360 participated in, you know, but then he invited all the guys 627 00:31:48,360 --> 00:31:51,040 over to the bonfire and they sat around and just, he just sat 628 00:31:51,040 --> 00:31:53,240 down and asked his friend. He's like, hey, you know, you're 629 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,320 getting married next month. Like how, Like what, what are 630 00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:58,760 you feeling right now? Like what's what's going on? 631 00:31:58,760 --> 00:32:00,440 Like what, what are your, what are your thoughts? 632 00:32:00,440 --> 00:32:02,600 Like what are you excited about? Like what are you, what are you 633 00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:05,640 scared about? And just created that space for 634 00:32:05,640 --> 00:32:07,720 other people to engage and connect with one another, which 635 00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:10,960 is just him stepping up in, in leadership for sure, you know, 636 00:32:11,000 --> 00:32:14,520 and taking, I think being afraid to see, OK, there's the, the, 637 00:32:14,560 --> 00:32:16,600 when you're, when you're with a group of friends like that, the 638 00:32:16,600 --> 00:32:18,440 good thing that's going to happen is that you guys are 639 00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:20,560 going to be with each other and you have an opportunity for 640 00:32:20,560 --> 00:32:22,520 connection. But sometimes that doesn't 641 00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:23,800 happen. It's not prioritized on the 642 00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:25,320 trip. So how can you step up and be 643 00:32:25,320 --> 00:32:28,120 the leader yourself and say, how do I create a space for people 644 00:32:28,120 --> 00:32:30,200 to actually engage in good, real conversation? 645 00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,440 Yeah, there's a reality that you have to be the one to bring that 646 00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:34,360 in, right? And it's not mutually exclusive 647 00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:37,160 to to everything else we said, but it's definitely like, Hey, 648 00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:40,760 you have had this amazing experience, this conversion. 649 00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:45,000 And maybe what's happening is that now God's inviting you to 650 00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:47,240 invite them into into deeper conversation. 651 00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:49,880 And you you cannot shy away from that. 652 00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:54,080 Do not do them and yourself that disservice from shying away from 653 00:32:54,520 --> 00:32:57,120 bringing the group together into a deeper conversation. 654 00:32:57,120 --> 00:32:59,120 Or maybe it starts with one-on-one, right? 655 00:32:59,120 --> 00:33:01,080 Me and John Michael kind of get into it a little bit when we're 656 00:33:01,360 --> 00:33:04,080 on our golf round. I specifically sit with him and 657 00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:06,280 share a cart so I can, you know, ask about his life. 658 00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:08,680 And then maybe at dinner, I sit next to Clayton to ask about his 659 00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:10,240 life. And then at now you know, I 660 00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:12,960 bring it to get you know, it kind of gather group and I'm 661 00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:15,280 kind of pulling things from our conversations to try to help 662 00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:17,080 them connect and and leave the conversation. 663 00:33:17,080 --> 00:33:19,480 Elsewhere, that's it's great points. 664 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:25,040 I I think to add to everything that's been said, just the, the 665 00:33:25,680 --> 00:33:28,840 don't underestimate the value of the example that you said on 666 00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:31,960 that trip. So, and I love this topic 667 00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:34,440 because I do think a lot of guys find themselves here and I think 668 00:33:34,440 --> 00:33:35,920 the bachelor party is a great example. 669 00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:39,280 That's kind of our life now is not as many spring break trips, 670 00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:41,880 but a ton of bachelor parties. Yeah, I love Bachelor. 671 00:33:41,880 --> 00:33:43,760 Parties so many. I have so many friends in 672 00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:45,720 bachelor. Parties right it they're a 673 00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:49,160 blast, but I think the example you said is is way more 674 00:33:49,160 --> 00:33:53,320 important than you know, if you evangelize or if you talk about 675 00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:57,400 God at the dinner table, it's the example of still go. 676 00:33:57,480 --> 00:34:00,520 I think that's a mistake some guys make is they kind of take 677 00:34:00,520 --> 00:34:02,680 the I'm better than you approach, like, oh, I'm not 678 00:34:02,680 --> 00:34:03,720 going. Yeah, you never want to take 679 00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:07,480 that there. There is, what's the word, like 680 00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:10,239 a exception? Yeah, like absolutely, If you 681 00:34:10,239 --> 00:34:12,520 know for a fact that this is going to cost you this sin. 682 00:34:12,679 --> 00:34:15,320 Yes, step back, right? But outside of that yet, please 683 00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,280 go. Please go and and it can be as 684 00:34:17,280 --> 00:34:19,400 simple as like everyone's drinking and you're, you're 685 00:34:19,400 --> 00:34:22,440 having some drinks with them. But after the second beer, after 686 00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:24,560 the third beer, you know, if it's over the course of time, 687 00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:27,360 after the 4th beer, you just take that example of like, hey, 688 00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:29,440 I'm just going to take a break. You know, for the next couple 689 00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:31,639 hours. You don't say that, but you do 690 00:34:31,639 --> 00:34:34,040 it and you grab a Gatorade, you grab a water, and you just take 691 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:35,360 a break while everyone keeps going. 692 00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:37,760 It could be as simple as taking time. 693 00:34:38,040 --> 00:34:41,679 My my biggest thing is the mornings are crucial because 694 00:34:41,679 --> 00:34:44,960 once the day gets rolling, it's really hard to take a step out. 695 00:34:45,360 --> 00:34:49,440 But be the first guy up, be the first guy to serve. 696 00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:52,320 That's a critical element. The guy that's cleaning up the. 697 00:34:52,320 --> 00:34:55,199 Guy that's cleaning the. Hero of the Trip and. 698 00:34:55,199 --> 00:34:57,880 No one wants to be the guy cleaning the dishes at the 699 00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:01,000 bachelor party. I saw this short on YouTube the 700 00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:05,320 other day and it was it was called guys on a guys on a trip 701 00:35:05,720 --> 00:35:07,920 and it's like they show up and they open the fridge and it's 702 00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:11,240 like a 12 count of eggs, 90 beers and then hot dogs. 703 00:35:12,240 --> 00:35:14,640 That's the only thing in the fridge and they're like, hey, do 704 00:35:14,640 --> 00:35:16,280 we have plates? Like, Oh, no, we didn't, we 705 00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:18,800 didn't forget plates. Oh, silverware, someone got 706 00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:20,200 silverware. Oh no, we didn't bring you 707 00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:22,120 silverware. Oh great, we got we got hot dog 708 00:35:22,120 --> 00:35:24,280 buns, right? Nope, no hot dog buns. 709 00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:27,040 Great. We'll just go ahead and grill 710 00:35:27,040 --> 00:35:29,520 the burgers or grill the hot dogs with our hands, and then 711 00:35:29,520 --> 00:35:32,960 we'll eat them by putting them on our beer and just biting like 712 00:35:32,960 --> 00:35:34,880 that. And I'm like, that's every guy's 713 00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:37,320 trip ever. But being the guy to clean the 714 00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,520 dishes, being the guy to get the coffee going in the morning 715 00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:44,640 before everyone else is awake, being the guy to sleep on the 716 00:35:44,640 --> 00:35:47,960 couch when everyone wants to be the first one to run in and 717 00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:51,360 claim the beds in the Airbnb. It's those kind of service 718 00:35:51,360 --> 00:35:54,720 elements that a lot of times speak louder to the character of 719 00:35:54,720 --> 00:35:56,720 a Christian than the words of a Christian. 720 00:35:57,440 --> 00:36:01,440 Absolutely. Yeah, I and funny enough, I, 721 00:36:01,640 --> 00:36:03,960 Joe, Michael and I were laughing about a tweet that we read 722 00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:07,720 earlier that was. Please, please bring that up. 723 00:36:07,960 --> 00:36:12,360 What was it was I just went on a trip with 9 of my closest 724 00:36:12,360 --> 00:36:15,640 friends and no, it was from the West perspectives like my 725 00:36:15,640 --> 00:36:18,160 husband just went on a trip with none of his closest friends and 726 00:36:18,160 --> 00:36:20,080 he came back. I was asking like how how are 727 00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:21,360 the marriages? How are the kids? 728 00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:24,920 How are like all their their friends lives, his friends lives 729 00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:26,680 and and he's he said, I don't know. 730 00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:28,840 And so I said, well, what did you talk about? 731 00:36:29,040 --> 00:36:31,560 He said, well, we try to name every US capital and then we 732 00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:35,480 started trying to name every African country, which is so 733 00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:37,480 funny and so true. Spot on. 734 00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:39,840 But you, you can't let it stop there. 735 00:36:39,840 --> 00:36:41,680 Like, it is good to have that, yes. 736 00:36:41,760 --> 00:36:44,160 But you definitely also need to push for the other side of the 737 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:47,160 coin of having those deeper conversations. 738 00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:49,120 And again, doesn't have to be like, hey, everyone, gather 739 00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:51,040 around. What's everyone thankful for? 740 00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:52,360 Yeah, what's everyone struggling with? 741 00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:54,600 Right. It can just be a short, you 742 00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:58,120 know, Hey, like, like I said, I'm, I'm going to be intentional 743 00:36:58,120 --> 00:37:01,160 about sitting next to this person at dinner or sharing a 744 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:02,960 cart with this person during our golf family today. 745 00:37:04,720 --> 00:37:07,160 We're we are all in on meaningless conversations. 746 00:37:07,440 --> 00:37:09,920 We are all in on meaningful conversations. 747 00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:12,640 We're all in on road trips. We're all in on creating 748 00:37:12,640 --> 00:37:16,360 lifelong memories, creating space for connection with one 749 00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:17,440 another. So if you're on a road trip 750 00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:20,280 right now or you're not on a road trip right now, make sure 751 00:37:20,280 --> 00:37:24,560 to like, comment and subscribe. This is the All In podcast.