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Hey listeners. 
This is Neil Ludovic and Amir 

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John dalli, welcome to leave 
looking up where we have 

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uplifting conversations about 
the state of the world with our 

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heroes, with the intention to 
demystify orient and leave you. 

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Our listeners inspired for this 
episode, we sat down with a 

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truly inspiring woman. 
Sheila Marie whose voice in the 

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world of Mental Health, social 
justice, and wellness is making 

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real Fact, Sheila has many 
titles, including author, 

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influencer and educator, but 
most important to her, Sheila is

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the founder of curvy curly 
conscious a movement focused on 

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decolonizing and celebrating 
black women's bodies. 

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In today's episode, we learn how
to have a conversation with your

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future self. 
Self-acceptance, the power of 

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finding your own Community tips 
and tricks for success and more 

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as we learn about Sheila's 
journey. 

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And now, without further Ado, 
let's start this episode. 

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We hope you enjoy it as much as 
we did and leave afterwards 

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looking up. 
I would encourage you to trust 

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yourself. 
Allow yourself to know, allow 

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yourself, you're not getting 
something from somewhere. 

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You have to figure out a way to 
get what you need. 

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Right? 
Why am I saying that is because 

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I want you to be happy and I 
want you to behold and 

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regardless of what's going on, 
the important thing is always 

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that we get our needs met by 
masturbation and manifestation, 

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that was one of our favorite 
topics from last year. 

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What is that? 
I don't know. 

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How do I do it? 
Sheila Marie. 

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Thank you so much for joining 
us. 

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Thank you both for having me. 
I'm excited to be here. 

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I first met Sheila at a tedx 
harlem event coordinated in 

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2012. 
I feel that I've lived so many 

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lives. 
I'm still living. 

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So many lives that have so many 
lives. 

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I will live that. 
I sometimes don't know where's 

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the beginning? 
We kneel floated the idea of 

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getting to sit down with Sheila 
and ask her anything. 

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I was psyched to say the least. 
I want to know how she came to 

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be the inspiring person. 
She is today, I was raised in 

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South Florida and my mother is 
Cuban but white racially and her

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family is also white Cuban and 
then my father's 

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African-American and so they 
divorced when I was three and 

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then my mother remarried, a 
white man who was I would say, 

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typically likes They're an 
American, that's how I became. 

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The only black person in my 
household and my day-to-day 

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experience was, I probably 
didn't really see many black 

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people may be at schools where I
saw the most, but even then, I 

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was in the gifted and talented 
program and maybe out of 50 

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kids, there was for black kids. 
And in my class there was one 

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and it was me. 
And then at the same time, I had

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my little sister who's blonde 
hair, and blue eyes and she's my

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best friend to this day. 
And so, you know, I remember 

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when she was Was born. 
I just thought she was like, a 

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baby doll. 
You know that we had like Little

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Mermaid. 
We had predominantly all the 

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princesses and everything were 
white, fair skin. 

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A lot of the dolls I was playing
with white. 

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And so, I have this like little 
beautiful, white baby, and I was

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just like, this is amazing. 
I'm like, this is like Toni 

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Morrison. 
Blue is II. 

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Was just like, what the hell did
I do wrong? 

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What the fuck? 
Sorry, can I curse you? 

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Do whatever you want. 
Okay, so explain to me, how the 

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hell I got like It's like what, 
you know, it was asking having 

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these like, existential 
conversations my mom and she was

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just overworked and she's gonna 
have time after this shit, you 

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know? 
But I was looking kiss away, 

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break it down, break it down, I 
know what happened. 

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Okay, so I know what happened. 
Okay. 

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Babies are all born white, 
that's what I thought that was 

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the standard, right? 
That's the norm. 

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And then like there's like a 
tanning part in the hospital and

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like you go and you like, put 
your baby in the Tanner and like

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you take him out when you want 
when they're ready and you just 

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forgot me in there, right? 
My mom is like, Like washing 

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dishes or something like Sheila.
Yeah, okay. 

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Okay. 
I know what happened. 

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So you you can take me to Home 
Depot because we went there the 

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other day and there's pain, so 
we can fix this. 

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And so then when I realized okay
you can't go to Home Depot and 

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paint yourself. 
I was like, well you have to 

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pick a side. 
That's the message. 

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I was getting it's black or 
white, especially in America 

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breaks down to a binary that 
always falls apart. 

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When you put it under a 
microscope, but as a kid I'm 

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like it's either black or white.
I can't fit in with white kids. 

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I was Like I don't want to I 
want to be around people that 

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look like me. 
Like what's up like I'm watching

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Family Matters. 
I'm a father on the force and 

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that kid was my son. 
I think that you rousted. 

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My son, come on, give me a 
break. 

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It's dark. 
It's a black guy. 

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Oh, Case Closed. 
Lock him up. 

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You know, bottom line, your kid 
was in the wrong part of town. 

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Demonstrations. 
Okay, Crusader, I believe in 

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your car when I appreciate that.
Oh my God. 

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What's wrong? 
If you want black history, go 

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back to Africa. 
And I'm looking at, like, wow, 

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what would it be like to be 
around a family that looks like 

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you to be around women, who know
how to do your hair, or know how

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to like a she putting on. 
On white people ocean and it's 

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not working, you know, seems 
like very rudimentary things but

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it has so much meaning. 
And so, I just decided I was 

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going to be black. 
Like that, was it? 

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It was like going into Middle 
School, maybe sixth grade. 

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I was like, I'm tired of eating 
lunch in the bathroom and being 

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scared that. 
I'm going to be bullied and made

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fun of because I'm Oreo, I'm 
hanging with white girls. 

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You know, I'm saying? 
I cut off all my white 

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girlfriends, and they were my 
homies and I just told myself, 

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you gotta fucking shoes. 
So I was like, Guys, I can't 

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come over anymore. 
Sorry can't ride to school with 

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you anymore. 
Mom dropped me off in the back 

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so I can walk. 
I don't want anyone to know. 

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I have a white Mom. 
I'm not showing any pictures of 

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my baby sister, and I'm just 
going to like fit in and that's 

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really what I did for. 
Maybe middle school, high 

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school, it started to become 
more natural. 

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Organic, I found a real group of
friends who are like 

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authentically attracted to me 
and not what I did in middle 

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school, which was kind of like, 
oh, black or just black. 

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I'm going to fit in now. 
Everything is going to be good 

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but that doesn't mean You align 
on shared experience or values 

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or anything else other than skin
tone. 

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And so, that was that right 
there. 

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That little story can capsulate 
like, a lot of the things that 

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stayed with me throughout my 
whole life, having been on this 

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journey of self acceptance, 
Sheila realized that not 

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choosing between different parts
of her identity, gave her the 

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ability to be kind of a 
chameleon. 

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She could weave in and out of 
different communities with ease 

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and confidence. 
I think that my early Cemented 

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this idea of one of these things
is not like the other. 

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You're not really going to fit 
into groups. 

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You kind of don't know who you 
are. 

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You're too much for this group, 
not enough for that group, and 

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in many ways, I created that 
throughout my life. 

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That's why I go in and out of so
many circles. 

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I was a teaching artist, but not
formally a teacher because I 

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was, like, I don't wanna be a 
teacher teacher. 

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So, when I had my freedom, you 
know, and then I was in acting, 

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but I didn't really go into it 
and be it full time. 

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Like I was pursuing it full time
but always have the backdrop of 

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like, I need to teach You know, 
just in case this thing doesn't 

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work out, I don't know if I'm 
good, but I'm not that good. 

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I'm dating a rapper, but I'm not
rappers wife. 

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I'm not rappers girlfriend, I'm 
kind of different, a little 

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weird. 
So, always like being in those 

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liminal spaces or in and out. 
At the same time, I feel that 

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has been my greatest strength, 
which I have not always been 

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able to call for those that want
to really internalize what this 

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is and understand who you are 
and what you're building. 

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Can you tell us about Curly 
Kirby Consciousness? 

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You know, for the people that 
don't know Kirby curly conscious

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is a Do that create safe spaces 
for women to heal and grow. 

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We are most known for the unruly
Retreat, which is our Retreat? 

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That is exclusively for women, 
who identify as black. 

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We do that our Retreat every 
year, but we also do other 

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events for women who are 
interested in healing and 

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growing but not taking it too. 
Seriously. 

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And I think that that's the best
thing about the curvy curly 

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conscious Community is that I'm 
not here to be some Guru that is

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proclaimed to have it all 
together. 

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ER, and better than you and you 
should aspire to be me. 

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No, that's not it. 
Let's say you're just coming in 

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to occur because the conscious 
event and I would say my little 

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Spiel, the first thing we're 
going to do is we have to get 

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rid of judgment. 
Self-judgment is one of the 

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biggest blocks into being honest
with yourself, and in order to 

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do any thing, we're going to do 
Beyond this point, we need 

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radical honesty and the 
experience of not judging 

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ourselves and others. 
This bill is informed by her 

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experience working as a teaching
artist in New York back when 

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Neil met her at the tedx event, 
almost 10 years ago, one of my 

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favorite things to do when I 
walked into a classroom, we had 

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to be put into these classrooms 
with kids who do not want to 

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hear theater stuff at all. 
And they would always complain. 

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And what I would do is I would 
walk into the classroom and say,

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okay, I know you don't know me. 
I'm not your teacher. 

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I know you don't want to do 
this. 

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I'm going to give you 10 seconds
of complaining. 

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Ten seconds to complain. 
Complain complain. 

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Get it all out. 
And then from there on, if 

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complaining shows up, we're 
going to say thank you, but no, 

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thank you. 
So we're going to do the same 

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thing with judgment. 
Any judgment that you have 

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yourself anything. 
That's you're nervous about any 

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judgment. 
You have of the are empowerment 

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and women's empowerment. 
Anything you have, you're gonna 

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say it work. 10 seconds. 
Everybody's going to get loud. 

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Everybody's gonna say anything 
that's standing in the way of 

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them getting what they need 
today, and then we counted 

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three. 
One, two, three. 

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Oh empowerment of It's aren't 
really empowering. 

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I can't believe what I'm doing 
here. 

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I'm, I'm alone. 
Nobody's gonna like me. 

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I'm not going to make any 
friends. 

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Oh my God, that'll even 
microwave on it. 

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Okay, and now welcome to Kirby 
fully conscious. 

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That's how we like lay the 
foundation. 

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So what we notice is like that's
just a small like, you know, 

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activity, but it's that 
cosmology. 

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Like is that way of seeing the 
world that the foundation for 

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all of the events, Sheila built 
a beautiful space for black 

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women and from the very 
beginning it was unruly indeed. 

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The first Retreat we ever did, 
it's a clothing optional Resort 

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and I didn't quite know what I 
was getting into but this is the

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Aries and me we go and ask 
questions later. 

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And the first night so you can 
choose, you don't have to, you 

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can choose, there's like a side,
you can go in the pool and it's 

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like everybody's going to have 
regular swim stuff on or 

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whatever or you can go to the 
other side. 

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But you have to be new. 
You have to be fully nude. 

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Like that's the only way 
everybody was on that side. 

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The first night everybody's it 
was almost a hundred of us if we

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were all over there and I was 
like, how did I get here? 

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But it was the coolant 
experience of my life and I'm so

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happy, I was able to do it 
because it was a little awkward 

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for five minutes but Then after 
that it was it. 

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So you have a belly ring. 
Oh my goodness. 

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Oh my. 
Is that your c-section scar? 

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That's so cool me, too. 
That I love your stretch marks. 

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Look at mine, but it was just 
beautiful. 

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And I was like, this is the 
world I want for. 

225
00:11:35,700 --> 00:11:39,100
Where is? 
It was so cool. 

226
00:11:39,300 --> 00:11:43,400
I wish I could do one of those 
again that sounds like the most 

227
00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:46,700
awesome Retreat. 
Sheila succeeded in making a 

228
00:11:46,700 --> 00:11:48,800
liberating space for black 
women. 

229
00:11:48,900 --> 00:11:51,600
Free from everything Society 
project onto them. 

230
00:11:53,100 --> 00:11:56,700
If I'm like human like I know 
that I'm human for sure, but I 

231
00:11:56,700 --> 00:11:59,900
kind of feel like sometimes I 
was a part of like some other 

232
00:11:59,900 --> 00:12:04,200
people and they like dropped me 
off here by mistake and I really

233
00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:07,100
am not supposed to be here. 
I thought for many years. 

234
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:09,300
I'm too sensitive for this 
earth. 

235
00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:12,400
Like I'm crying. 
Everything hurts, my feelings. 

236
00:12:12,700 --> 00:12:15,000
I'm feeling people's emotions 
all the times. 

237
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,300
I didn't know what an impact was
for many years. 

238
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:21,000
So I just thought, am I crazy 
like, you know, I'm highly 

239
00:12:21,000 --> 00:12:22,700
spiritual. 
I feel like I'm always seen. 

240
00:12:22,900 --> 00:12:24,900
Things that other people are not
seeing. 

241
00:12:25,000 --> 00:12:28,300
And then, if I say people say 
that, I'm not, and I feel crazy,

242
00:12:28,500 --> 00:12:30,700
and then I'm a black woman. 
I'm not supposed to be this 

243
00:12:30,700 --> 00:12:33,800
sensitive, you're supposed to be
strong, but I don't fit in, and 

244
00:12:33,800 --> 00:12:37,700
I always felt that I just am in 
the wrong world. 

245
00:12:37,800 --> 00:12:42,600
And then I found my community 
and I found other women who are 

246
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:46,600
saying me too, I'm also 
sensitive, but I just don't show

247
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:50,000
it or I've never even had the 
space to explore it. 

248
00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:54,800
And so, I just think about the 
lineage, Of black women's bodies

249
00:12:54,900 --> 00:12:57,300
and are, you know, labor taking 
care of our own family, 

250
00:12:57,300 --> 00:12:59,700
breastfeeding other people's 
children, and then coming home 

251
00:12:59,700 --> 00:13:02,300
and having to take care of your 
children and how much we 

252
00:13:02,300 --> 00:13:06,900
identify our worthiness, our 
value, our self-identity about 

253
00:13:06,900 --> 00:13:09,100
how much we can do, how much we 
can work. 

254
00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:12,800
And then not only for black 
women, everybody, especially, in

255
00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:16,800
America, we live in fucking Wolf
of Wall Street. 

256
00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:20,600
Like it, where you, you are 
worthy to pay some, what you can

257
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:24,300
produce, what if you produce and
Even me I'm in the women's 

258
00:13:24,300 --> 00:13:27,200
empowerment space and and I used
to be like, yeah, girl boss, 

259
00:13:27,200 --> 00:13:29,800
that's what I want to be, or do 
you girl boss, my company, made 

260
00:13:29,800 --> 00:13:31,800
this much, I did this place, did
it? 

261
00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:34,400
And then I thought to myself, 
like we're kind of just 

262
00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:37,200
recreating the same thing. 
But in pink, you know what I'm 

263
00:13:37,200 --> 00:13:40,900
saying? 
Recreating oppressive structures

264
00:13:40,900 --> 00:13:44,700
isn't, what Sheila wanted to be 
doing like many of us before the

265
00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:48,000
pandemic. 
She was going full speed but 

266
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,500
once everything stopped, she 
realized. 

267
00:13:50,500 --> 00:13:54,500
It wasn't sustainable. 
Thing was going to give if she 

268
00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:58,900
didn't slow down and re-evaluate
what success meant to her. 

269
00:13:59,100 --> 00:14:01,300
If it was no longer pink girl 
boss. 

270
00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:06,000
I felt that I was on a treadmill
and then pandemic a and I got 

271
00:14:06,000 --> 00:14:07,400
off the trail on. 
I was like, oh my God, I'm 

272
00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:12,700
fucking tired, I'm exhausted, 
I'm exhausted, I don't like the 

273
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:15,300
way I'm living. 
I don't want working this hard, 

274
00:14:16,100 --> 00:14:19,900
black bodies in the United 
States, have been defined around

275
00:14:19,900 --> 00:14:23,600
their labor, and even in 
worthiness, Around their labor, 

276
00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:26,800
you know, if you could produce a
certain amount of cotton than 

277
00:14:26,800 --> 00:14:29,700
you would be a better Slave at 
that time. 

278
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:35,400
And I think that for my 
community being taken completely

279
00:14:35,400 --> 00:14:38,600
out of that environment, and 
it's a total disruption that you

280
00:14:38,608 --> 00:14:41,500
don't even realize. 
I am a sensitive to. 

281
00:14:42,000 --> 00:14:45,700
I have feel like that also. 
I also feel like I maybe just 

282
00:14:45,700 --> 00:14:48,700
going with the flow of things 
that I don't like, I haven't 

283
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:52,100
really thought about how much I 
don't like that and I don't 

284
00:14:52,100 --> 00:14:53,700
know. 
If you can come to that 

285
00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:57,000
realization without these types 
of disruptions and there, we 

286
00:14:57,000 --> 00:14:59,500
were very privileged to be able 
to have them. 

287
00:14:59,500 --> 00:15:02,000
I feel like I have a 
responsibility to offer up these

288
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:05,400
disruptions in a day-to-day type
of way or in a way for somebody 

289
00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:08,400
who can't go away. 
Can't afford a retreat, can't 

290
00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:11,900
leave their family. 
When she says disruptions, I 

291
00:15:11,900 --> 00:15:16,000
picture a train coming to an 
abrupt stop having to pause and 

292
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:19,200
take stock taking the time to 
ask. 

293
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:22,300
What am I actually doing? 
Interrupting. 

294
00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:25,700
The Breakneck pace of our daily 
lives allowing for deeper 

295
00:15:25,700 --> 00:15:28,100
reflection and increased 
self-awareness. 

296
00:15:28,900 --> 00:15:33,600
It's less about doing and more 
about not doing and being okay 

297
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,700
with that. 
Which could have the greatest 

298
00:15:35,700 --> 00:15:39,400
impact on our mindsets. 
I saw a tick tock the other day 

299
00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:42,100
that said something. 
Like, for people who grew up in 

300
00:15:42,100 --> 00:15:46,200
chaos piece feels like boredom. 
And I have to remind myself 

301
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:48,700
that, you know, there are tons 
of things more than I should be 

302
00:15:48,700 --> 00:15:51,000
doing more things and more and 
more and more and remind. 

303
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:55,200
Myself like what a gift? 
It is to just feel like that, 

304
00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:58,400
I'm not on high alert right now.
Like remind my nervous system 

305
00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:03,200
that we're not at War and it's 
okay, to be, you'll notice even 

306
00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:06,800
from my response, time and 
emails and the amount of jobs 

307
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:10,900
that I take, I give myself space
now that I've never given myself

308
00:16:10,900 --> 00:16:14,300
permission to do because I 
actually want to live because 

309
00:16:14,300 --> 00:16:16,700
we're human being not a human 
doing. 

310
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:20,500
And for me, that doesn't mean 
going on a big trip go. 

311
00:16:20,500 --> 00:16:22,900
It just means He's like, oh, you
know what? 

312
00:16:23,300 --> 00:16:25,100
I haven't played Sims in 10 
years. 

313
00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:29,500
I fucking love this Sims. 
That's it. 

314
00:16:29,500 --> 00:16:32,000
You know, I'm going to read a 
book today whatever, you know, 

315
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,800
not everything has to be geared 
towards. 

316
00:16:34,300 --> 00:16:36,900
What am I doing? 
And creating a finding that time

317
00:16:36,900 --> 00:16:40,700
to just be and it sounds like a 
kind of cliche but it really is 

318
00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:50,300
true for me. 
Neil, and I are speaking with 

319
00:16:50,300 --> 00:16:53,700
Sheila Marie about why she 
started the curvy curly 

320
00:16:53,700 --> 00:16:58,300
conscious movement together. 
We want to dig deeper into the 

321
00:16:58,300 --> 00:17:00,700
tools. 
We've all used when facing 

322
00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:05,500
obstacles whether they're beyond
our control or inside our own 

323
00:17:05,500 --> 00:17:09,099
heads. 
There's one awesome tool which 

324
00:17:09,099 --> 00:17:12,000
has been sort of a guiding 
Mantra in. 

325
00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:15,700
Where do you go when you have 
nowhere to go is your mind, your

326
00:17:15,700 --> 00:17:18,800
mind is this infinite abyss and 
there's this cool tool called 

327
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:23,900
The Invisible Council. 
It's a space that 4510 however 

328
00:17:23,900 --> 00:17:27,400
many people alive or dead that 
you idolize that you embody that

329
00:17:27,599 --> 00:17:32,100
if you have questions about what
to do and how to do it, take 30 

330
00:17:32,100 --> 00:17:35,800
minutes on your Monday morning 
and have an invisible council 

331
00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:38,500
meeting and you sit down And you
have this meeting and what you 

332
00:17:38,508 --> 00:17:42,300
will learn about yourself just 
through the perspectives of the 

333
00:17:42,300 --> 00:17:45,200
other people that are coming 
there that are sitting down at 

334
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:49,500
your little council meeting and 
having that community that can 

335
00:17:49,500 --> 00:17:51,400
challenge you and that can push 
you. 

336
00:17:53,700 --> 00:17:56,700
I think there's an ideal of 
masculinity that is like, I 

337
00:17:56,708 --> 00:17:59,900
don't need these kinds of tools 
and resources and take a moment 

338
00:17:59,900 --> 00:18:02,600
to myself. 
I was raised in a household with

339
00:18:02,600 --> 00:18:05,900
the idea of bottling, your 
emotions and pulling pulling 

340
00:18:05,900 --> 00:18:08,900
yourself up by the bootstraps 
was completely internalized. 

341
00:18:08,900 --> 00:18:13,400
I'm just now in a space where 
that's shifting and changing But

342
00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:16,900
it took that suggestion in 
combination with looking at a 

343
00:18:16,900 --> 00:18:19,800
few of my role models and 
hearing that they did that too. 

344
00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:23,300
There's a serious decolonization
that needs to happen. 

345
00:18:23,300 --> 00:18:26,900
Both in our bodies for for what 
work is and I think a millennial

346
00:18:27,200 --> 00:18:30,800
a millennial stance of you are 
defined by the work that you do.

347
00:18:31,300 --> 00:18:33,500
What you said about the 
invisible council is so 

348
00:18:33,500 --> 00:18:37,700
interesting because one of my 
favorite meditation is, is based

349
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:38,900
on. 
Have you ever heard of Quantum 

350
00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:42,300
Jumping know? 
I based it off of that Quantum 

351
00:18:42,300 --> 00:18:45,600
Jumping is the Principal like 
there could be unlimited 

352
00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:49,000
parallel, universes and 
unlimited parallel versions of 

353
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,100
you. 
And so if you're having an issue

354
00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:54,400
here, all you have to do is just
go meet the other version of you

355
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:57,800
who's figured it out and see 
what they did and ask him, what 

356
00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:00,300
they did spend some time, watch 
what they're eating, watch what 

357
00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:03,000
they're doing, and it's very 
similar to that when you said, 

358
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:05,700
where do you go and you have 
nowhere to go and I had so true 

359
00:19:05,700 --> 00:19:08,500
when I started my journey and I 
was living in New York and that 

360
00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,200
I couldn't afford to do any of 
that. 

361
00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:13,500
I went to free yoga classes. 
It. 

362
00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:17,200
I was meditating every day I 
just was like, I'm going to be 

363
00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:18,000
here. 
I'm gone. 

364
00:19:18,100 --> 00:19:19,900
I'm gonna go. 
I'm gonna go at that time. 

365
00:19:19,900 --> 00:19:22,300
I was just getting out of an 
abusive relationship and I was 

366
00:19:22,300 --> 00:19:26,600
like I I can't even imagine and 
a guy like we having a healthy 

367
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:28,800
Dynamic. 
Like I'm I'm worthless. 

368
00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:30,400
I'm a lovable. 
You know. 

369
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:33,200
Like when you're out of a 
breakup, you feel terrible and 

370
00:19:33,200 --> 00:19:36,600
so I was going there like let me
just go visit the version of 

371
00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,800
myself. 
Whoo, What do I want? 

372
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:41,400
I actually do want to be 
married. 

373
00:19:41,400 --> 00:19:43,100
I think I've been telling myself
this whole Time. 

374
00:19:43,100 --> 00:19:44,800
I don't want to be married 
because I want to be like a 

375
00:19:44,900 --> 00:19:46,700
feminist like I'm in the 
independent. 

376
00:19:46,700 --> 00:19:49,900
I don't need anything. 
I'm gonna just live like on a 

377
00:19:49,908 --> 00:19:51,800
communist. 
So I was like, I'm gonna go meet

378
00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:55,400
married Sheila and I'm gonna go 
see what she's doing. 

379
00:19:55,500 --> 00:19:59,400
And so this is at the time when 
I have no marriage prospects in 

380
00:19:59,400 --> 00:20:02,000
sight at all. 
I was I all right, I'm just 

381
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:03,800
gonna go and see what I started 
reading. 

382
00:20:04,000 --> 00:20:07,000
I was devouring books at the 
time and so I went into this 

383
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:11,900
meditation Quantum leaping, you 
basically you see a door and 

384
00:20:11,900 --> 00:20:14,200
then you open the door. 
The other side of the door will 

385
00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:17,700
be yourself, you have to 
identify whatever that that self

386
00:20:17,700 --> 00:20:19,500
is okay. 
It's myself, who's married? 

387
00:20:19,700 --> 00:20:24,200
And first is I just observed, 
and I just saw and I have his 

388
00:20:24,200 --> 00:20:28,700
journal entry to this day and I 
wrote down that I noticed that 

389
00:20:28,700 --> 00:20:31,300
they were getting up like, on 
their own accord. 

390
00:20:31,300 --> 00:20:35,000
It wasn't like an alarm clock. 
So that told me, I think they 

391
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:37,500
work for themselves. 
It's like me and a guy. 

392
00:20:37,900 --> 00:20:41,500
And I was like, okay, then when 
I saw him, he was darker skin. 

393
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:46,200
I was like, yes, And he had like
these locks, who's like, oh, 

394
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:49,000
he's so fine. 
He had locks and they were like,

395
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:52,000
down his back and I was like, 
okay? 

396
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:56,100
I couldn't tell that it could be
an athlete but he's not an 

397
00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:58,300
athlete. 
Like he's very athletic police 

398
00:20:58,300 --> 00:21:00,100
killed, but that's not what he 
does. 

399
00:21:00,100 --> 00:21:04,400
I can figure out what he does, 
but then I saw that I was making

400
00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,700
breakfast and it was just a slow
like, getting out of the house. 

401
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:10,700
So I was like, we're not rushed 
for anything, but the house 

402
00:21:10,700 --> 00:21:12,800
looks really nice. 
So we might be doing, okay? 

403
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:16,900
Okay, and I wrote all those 
things down and like years 

404
00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:21,400
later, when I met a case, I had 
to read him, the journal entry 

405
00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:26,200
Aces, her husband better known 
as Ace Hood the multi-platinum 

406
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:29,600
selling rapper and recording 
artist who you may know from 

407
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:32,800
Love & Hip, Hop in Miami. 
I'm so blessed and thankful and 

408
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:35,900
privilege and then he's 
muscular. 

409
00:21:35,900 --> 00:21:38,100
It could be an athlete, he used 
to play football, but he 

410
00:21:38,100 --> 00:21:39,600
doesn't. 
He has lots. 

411
00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:45,500
I was like, this is crazy. 
Like last year, we did a couples

412
00:21:45,500 --> 00:21:50,000
therapy and one of our exercises
was to go off and we 

413
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:53,500
individually had to write down 
all the versions of ourselves 

414
00:21:53,500 --> 00:21:57,000
that ever existed from like any 
time that you felt that there 

415
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,600
was a transition and you went 
from one version of yourself to 

416
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,500
another. 
Then that's a new one and list 

417
00:22:02,500 --> 00:22:05,400
them. 
And like, give them a name and I

418
00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,900
cannot tell you. 
That was the most profound 

419
00:22:07,900 --> 00:22:10,500
exercise of ever done. 
Not only for me, but learning 

420
00:22:10,500 --> 00:22:12,900
that about him. 
But even myself Sitting down and

421
00:22:12,900 --> 00:22:16,200
then like, well it's almost as 
if they're all these versions of

422
00:22:16,208 --> 00:22:20,100
myself are apart of this 
Orchestra and they needed to go 

423
00:22:20,100 --> 00:22:22,800
off and each of them needed to 
have their like rehearsals, like

424
00:22:22,800 --> 00:22:26,100
the violin strings need to go 
together and harmonize with the 

425
00:22:26,108 --> 00:22:30,000
strings and the percussion and 
they can't all harmonize 

426
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:32,000
together at the same time. 
They need to hear everybody's 

427
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:33,600
like a different tones and ways 
of working. 

428
00:22:33,900 --> 00:22:36,800
But then when they come together
I feel like previous points in 

429
00:22:36,808 --> 00:22:38,600
my life. 
I was fighting them. 

430
00:22:38,600 --> 00:22:40,300
I don't want to be that one. 
I don't like that one. 

431
00:22:40,300 --> 00:22:42,200
I reject that one. 
That one around. 

432
00:22:42,300 --> 00:22:45,100
And now I feel like I'm just not
coming to a place where they can

433
00:22:45,100 --> 00:22:49,300
come together and harmonize the 
ability to have Harmony within 

434
00:22:49,300 --> 00:22:51,900
yourself. 
Absolutely changes the game. 

435
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:56,400
I appreciate what she'll is 
talking about because giving 

436
00:22:56,400 --> 00:23:00,100
yourself permission to see is 
super important. 

437
00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:04,800
I always check in with my future
self and see what he's doing, it

438
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:07,300
helps me work through, whatever 
challenges I'm facing. 

439
00:23:08,100 --> 00:23:10,900
So how does Sheila give herself 
permission to see? 

440
00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:14,500
I'm writing my second book this 
year, the editor asked me who 

441
00:23:14,500 --> 00:23:18,300
you writing this book for, and I
kept thinking my community, I'm 

442
00:23:18,300 --> 00:23:22,000
writing it for a woman who had a
similar experience to me and, 

443
00:23:22,300 --> 00:23:25,300
and all those answers and I, and
I kept going into my meditation 

444
00:23:25,300 --> 00:23:27,700
and be like, why does it feel 
like it's there? 

445
00:23:27,700 --> 00:23:32,200
But it's not quite there. 
And the other day I was like, 

446
00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:35,100
all right, all right, all right.
Sheila, who wrote the book 

447
00:23:35,100 --> 00:23:36,600
already? 
She little wrote the book 

448
00:23:36,600 --> 00:23:39,700
already and Sheila who has it's 
amazing New York Times 

449
00:23:39,700 --> 00:23:41,700
best-seller about like Who is it
in? 

450
00:23:41,700 --> 00:23:43,400
And I saw her. 
And she looked like, almost like

451
00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:46,600
a superhero, and it was like, 
very clear to me. 

452
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:49,700
I was like, oh, okay, I'm 
writing the book for myself. 

453
00:23:50,100 --> 00:23:53,000
Oh my gosh, am I narcissistic? 
Are you know, there's so many 

454
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,200
nurses, teachers, distinct Rays.
That's such a buzzword now. 

455
00:23:56,400 --> 00:23:59,400
No, no, it has to be altruistic 
has to be selfless, has to be 

456
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,800
for my community. 
And then what I realized is that

457
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:04,900
like if you have a history of 
people pleasing, what you find 

458
00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:07,400
is that you can't even be 
egocentric. 

459
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:10,900
You don't even know who you are.
Your whole identity has been you

460
00:24:10,900 --> 00:24:13,700
sir. 
By you being sensitive to the 

461
00:24:13,700 --> 00:24:16,800
needs and the thoughts and the 
opinions of others around you 

462
00:24:17,100 --> 00:24:20,600
and then they've been molded 
into your identity that to the 

463
00:24:20,600 --> 00:24:23,700
point where if you don't ever 
sit down and get to know who you

464
00:24:23,700 --> 00:24:26,500
are, if you don't ever sit down 
and let yourself be the captain 

465
00:24:26,500 --> 00:24:30,300
of that ship, you can't them 
adjust then you can't even 

466
00:24:30,300 --> 00:24:32,800
manage. 
Then you can't even ship because

467
00:24:33,100 --> 00:24:36,600
it's like you have that first 
step is being like okay what 

468
00:24:36,600 --> 00:24:40,100
part is me and what part is not 
me and how did I get here? 

469
00:24:40,100 --> 00:24:42,000
And why? 
And what I want to do now. 

470
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:46,300
And so I think that going back 
to spend time with myself, felt 

471
00:24:46,300 --> 00:24:49,600
so comforting even just if it 
gave me the indication that I 

472
00:24:49,608 --> 00:24:53,600
could do it that I knew. 
And so now like coming here to 

473
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:58,100
when I'm writing my book, I very
much was like okay that's it. 

474
00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:02,200
I'm writing the book for those 
past versions of Sheila because 

475
00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:05,800
at any point during my journey 
if she would have read this book

476
00:25:05,900 --> 00:25:09,100
it would have helped her in some
way and I also am writing it for

477
00:25:09,100 --> 00:25:11,600
the future version of me that 
can only Be born. 

478
00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:14,600
If I write the book, this 
beautiful picture that you paint

479
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:20,000
in my head, is this future? 
Like, I you've painted it, I see

480
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,900
this version this future version
of yourself and you meeting it. 

481
00:25:24,600 --> 00:25:28,100
I think that sometimes I have to
make sure to remind myself that 

482
00:25:28,100 --> 00:25:32,100
I met her because I'm always 
thinking about to Future 

483
00:25:32,100 --> 00:25:33,900
versions. 
So, remind yourself that you 

484
00:25:33,900 --> 00:25:37,900
have caught up with her in a 
certain way and fighting through

485
00:25:37,900 --> 00:25:42,000
a lot of imposter syndrome of 
like what Why do people care 

486
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:44,400
what I have to say? 
Like, I'm not a doctor, I'm not 

487
00:25:44,400 --> 00:25:46,600
a PhD. 
I'm that like, telling myself 

488
00:25:46,600 --> 00:25:49,100
all of these reasons why I'm not
qualified. 

489
00:25:49,100 --> 00:25:52,700
And so I have to remind myself 
to impostor syndrome with, like,

490
00:25:52,700 --> 00:25:56,900
shows up for a lot of us now, I 
have a question and it's along 

491
00:25:56,900 --> 00:26:00,300
this train of thought here, and,
and it's about who you look up 

492
00:26:00,300 --> 00:26:04,400
to. 
And before I fully release, that

493
00:26:04,400 --> 00:26:05,800
question. 
I also want to offer another 

494
00:26:05,800 --> 00:26:07,800
reflection, another 
acknowledgement, something else 

495
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:09,900
that I'm that I'm seeing that 
I'm hearing here. 

496
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,400
There's a book that I Of it's my
most gifted book. 

497
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:15,300
It's called the anatomy of the 
spirit and there's a part in 

498
00:26:15,308 --> 00:26:19,500
that book where it talks about 
the four stages of personal 

499
00:26:19,500 --> 00:26:22,300
power. 
And one of these words came up, 

500
00:26:22,500 --> 00:26:26,300
the two stages are Revolution 
and involution. 

501
00:26:26,400 --> 00:26:29,600
The third stage is narcissism 
than the fourth is evolution. 

502
00:26:29,800 --> 00:26:33,000
So the first two in short our 
stages, where you kind of start 

503
00:26:33,000 --> 00:26:35,500
realizing that you might be 
thinking differently than people

504
00:26:35,500 --> 00:26:38,800
around you, maybe you realize 
that you're queer, maybe you 

505
00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:42,600
realize that you're actually Ali
don't want to be living in this 

506
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:46,200
city anymore or maybe you might 
realize, oh, my gosh, what's 

507
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:47,800
going on with single-use 
plastics? 

508
00:26:48,100 --> 00:26:50,300
Something about that, is 
different, right? 

509
00:26:50,300 --> 00:26:53,200
And then, in the third stage, 
this narcissistic stage, which 

510
00:26:53,200 --> 00:26:55,300
you said earlier, you said that,
you know, there could be a lot 

511
00:26:55,300 --> 00:26:56,900
of different interpretations to 
that word. 

512
00:26:56,900 --> 00:26:59,800
In this case, the narcissistic 
phase is one where you're pretty

513
00:26:59,800 --> 00:27:02,200
firm on your new value. 
You know, you do your best to 

514
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:04,100
carry a reusable, water bottle 
everywhere. 

515
00:27:04,100 --> 00:27:06,700
You know you feel proud and you 
want to dress a certain way or 

516
00:27:06,700 --> 00:27:08,300
Etc. 
There's just this like phase 

517
00:27:08,300 --> 00:27:11,900
where you're like, this is who I
am right now and if The person 

518
00:27:11,900 --> 00:27:14,500
remains steadfast throughout 
this process, they shift into 

519
00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:17,500
the fourth stage which is 
evolution and they shift from 

520
00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:22,100
being a person to a Persona and 
one that can create a field that

521
00:27:22,100 --> 00:27:24,800
galvanizes inspiration. 
And I'm saying this, because I 

522
00:27:24,808 --> 00:27:27,300
want to offer that reflection 
that what I'm hearing from you 

523
00:27:27,300 --> 00:27:31,900
is as a girl, you were realizing
all of these ways in which the 

524
00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:34,400
world made you feel like you 
didn't belong and then somewhere

525
00:27:34,400 --> 00:27:37,800
along the line, you did find 
your belonging. 

526
00:27:38,800 --> 00:27:41,200
And then that cup is runneth 
over. 

527
00:27:41,700 --> 00:27:45,900
That micro became a reflection 
of the macro and what you 

528
00:27:45,900 --> 00:27:49,100
created for yourself. 
Your own sense of belonging and 

529
00:27:49,100 --> 00:27:52,700
as where as we're hearing from 
you and as we're coloring in 

530
00:27:52,700 --> 00:27:56,200
these wonderful lines of your 
story, who do you look up to now

531
00:27:56,200 --> 00:27:59,100
in addition to your future self 
who creates that sense of 

532
00:27:59,100 --> 00:28:02,800
belonging for you. 
Like I really, really look up to

533
00:28:02,800 --> 00:28:07,700
people who are bold, I honestly 
look up to the Generation Z. 

534
00:28:08,500 --> 00:28:12,700
I think that's why I like 
Tik-Tok so much because they are

535
00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:18,000
so bold and so intelligent and 
have such a grasp on how to talk

536
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:22,600
about race and gender that my 
generation is still like just 

537
00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:26,000
learning about. 
And they are so bold with how 

538
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,900
they speak openly and accept who
they are. 

539
00:28:29,200 --> 00:28:32,800
And hold themselves accountable 
as feel that Generations. 

540
00:28:32,800 --> 00:28:36,800
He also has a kindness that I 
really think is refreshing. 

541
00:28:37,300 --> 00:28:41,400
Humans can be Harsh. 
And I really admire kind people 

542
00:28:41,800 --> 00:28:45,200
because it is very hard. 
It takes a lot of strength and 

543
00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:49,300
courage to be kind in our world.
I love that you share that. 

544
00:28:49,300 --> 00:28:52,600
It gives me, it gives me a 
different lens to look into 

545
00:28:52,600 --> 00:28:55,500
that. 
I also think it it segues really

546
00:28:55,500 --> 00:28:58,800
well into this idea of who were 
giving thanks to, who are we 

547
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:01,200
recognizing Our Lives? 
Both that, we know and that we 

548
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:04,100
don't know that Inspire us. 
Anyone that you haven't given 

549
00:29:04,100 --> 00:29:08,100
thanks to already that you would
want to do right now. 

550
00:29:09,300 --> 00:29:16,900
I wish I could find Miss miles. 
Miss miles, was my eighth grade 

551
00:29:17,100 --> 00:29:21,600
AP, English teacher. 
And on the first day of school, 

552
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:25,900
she gave the whole class roses, 
everybody had like an individual

553
00:29:25,900 --> 00:29:28,500
rows, and we were just like, 
what are we doing? 

554
00:29:28,500 --> 00:29:32,300
This is a rose and she said, 
now, look at your rose. 

555
00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:34,600
And look at everybody else's 
roast, right? 

556
00:29:34,700 --> 00:29:38,900
Everyone has a different rows. 
Some are closed, some are more 

557
00:29:39,100 --> 00:29:41,800
Open than others. 
Some are different sizes. 

558
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:45,700
Your journey in this class, this
year is going to be yours. 

559
00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:49,800
Don't compare yourself to the 
people around you and so that 

560
00:29:49,800 --> 00:29:52,600
was so comforting to me. 
She set the tone for how we were

561
00:29:52,600 --> 00:29:55,700
going to move through the year 
and she always made learning so 

562
00:29:55,700 --> 00:29:57,600
fun. 
She did everything in such a fun

563
00:29:57,600 --> 00:30:01,400
and creative way she held us to 
very high standards. 

564
00:30:01,400 --> 00:30:04,700
But if you fell behind, she 
always met you where you were. 

565
00:30:04,900 --> 00:30:07,100
And I never forget that day with
the Roses. 

566
00:30:07,100 --> 00:30:11,400
I tried to find her before. 
And I hope that this, this finds

567
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:14,900
her because Miss miles deserves 
all her roses as well. 

568
00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:18,500
Yes, miles, thank you. 
If you are listening to this, 

569
00:30:18,700 --> 00:30:20,900
please reach out to us. 
Thank you. 

570
00:30:20,900 --> 00:30:27,100
Miss Mi, thank you, Miss miles. 
What do you want our listeners, 

571
00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:31,000
your listeners to do after you 
hit this podcast, just finished 

572
00:30:31,000 --> 00:30:33,400
right now? 
What do you want their energy to

573
00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:38,000
go to as soon as this ends sit 
for a second and silence before 

574
00:30:38,000 --> 00:30:41,300
I can move on to the next Said 
Tiffany even if it's actually 60

575
00:30:41,300 --> 00:30:44,600
seconds and just sit and ask 
yourself. 

576
00:30:44,600 --> 00:30:47,300
If there's anything that you 
want to take anything, a lot of 

577
00:30:47,300 --> 00:30:49,000
things are going to fly by, but 
is there anything that you want 

578
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:50,400
to take with? 
You is like there. 

579
00:30:50,400 --> 00:30:53,400
Any one thing that you can take 
any gem that you can take to 

580
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:56,200
implement into your daily life? 
Because there's so many I'm sure

581
00:30:56,200 --> 00:31:00,500
here and I really want to say 
thank you because I don't do 

582
00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:02,700
podcasts. 
I feel like I got some type of 

583
00:31:02,700 --> 00:31:06,500
healing on some aspect of my 
life, just being here from being

584
00:31:06,500 --> 00:31:08,900
in a man that are supportive and
Men. 

585
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:12,600
That are uplifting women and and
giving us the micro sharing at 

586
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:13,600
the kids. 
Really beautiful. 

587
00:31:13,600 --> 00:31:16,100
And you should definitely just 
be honored for that. 

588
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:18,800
I'm honored by your presence. 
Oh my gosh. 

589
00:31:19,100 --> 00:31:23,000
Oh my gosh. 
Thank you for so, so refreshing.

590
00:31:23,300 --> 00:31:24,900
That's flashing happening right 
now. 

591
00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:34,400
But real version of myself that 
is working on internalizing. 

592
00:31:34,400 --> 00:31:36,800
A compliment is struggling right
now. 

593
00:31:38,000 --> 00:31:42,300
The other version says let's 
confuse that with humor. 

594
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:47,000
Okay this looks like a great 
moment to segue to the rapid 

595
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:57,500
fire. 
All right, I started ready your 

596
00:31:57,500 --> 00:32:01,900
favorite movie? 
Um, oh that's too hard. 

597
00:32:02,000 --> 00:32:05,600
That's too hard. 
A revolutionary room favorite 

598
00:32:05,600 --> 00:32:09,600
song who are also my favorite 
song? 

599
00:32:09,900 --> 00:32:13,100
Oh, Part of Your World Little 
Mermaid. 

600
00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:17,700
Why haven't favorite foreign 
word? 

601
00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:25,600
What? 
And where was I? 

602
00:32:25,900 --> 00:32:31,100
In Dakar Senegal. 
That's how you say like say - 

603
00:32:31,300 --> 00:32:33,700
Jared. 
If I just remember is just, it 

604
00:32:33,700 --> 00:32:36,400
was just beautiful. 
That's all I can say. 

605
00:32:36,600 --> 00:32:40,700
Favorite fruit. 
Oh, I'm gonna go with Appleman 

606
00:32:40,900 --> 00:32:42,200
apples. 
All right. 

607
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:45,300
Pancakes, or waffles? 
Waffles all day. 

608
00:32:46,400 --> 00:32:51,100
Oh yeah, hesitate on that. 
When are your golden hours? 

609
00:32:51,100 --> 00:32:55,800
When are you most productive? 
Like 2 to 5 p.m. and bring it 

610
00:32:55,800 --> 00:32:57,000
home? 
Chocolate or vanilla? 

611
00:32:57,100 --> 00:32:59,700
Exactly. 
I want to, I want to throw one 

612
00:32:59,700 --> 00:33:01,600
other one, other question in 
there. 

613
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:05,700
What's the last thing you do 
before you go to bed for? 

614
00:33:05,700 --> 00:33:08,700
You going to wait before you end
your day the last and to them is

615
00:33:08,700 --> 00:33:09,900
dead. 
Oh, I watch Netflix. 

616
00:33:09,900 --> 00:33:11,400
That's the last thing I do at 
the end of my day. 

617
00:33:11,400 --> 00:33:14,800
Yeah, me and my husband, we go 
watch something and the 

618
00:33:14,800 --> 00:33:17,100
complement to that is. 
What is the first thing you do 

619
00:33:17,100 --> 00:33:19,100
when you wake up I like what how
do you start your day? 

620
00:33:20,300 --> 00:33:24,800
Thirty minutes of exercise. 
For my men tools and everything.

621
00:33:25,100 --> 00:33:28,200
Thank you so much Sheila for 
joining us, for being part of 

622
00:33:28,200 --> 00:33:33,300
leave looking up and, and giving
a little bit of your time and 

623
00:33:33,300 --> 00:33:37,100
energy and mentality to us. 
Thank you. 

624
00:33:37,100 --> 00:33:39,300
Thank you. 
Thank you seriously. 

625
00:33:39,300 --> 00:33:41,100
Thank you so much Sheila. 
Thank you. 

626
00:33:41,100 --> 00:33:43,500
The feeling is mutual. 
Thank you so much. 

627
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:51,900
You can follow Sheila on all 
social channels at the Sheila 

628
00:33:51,900 --> 00:33:55,800
Marie. 
Or on her website at www.ge.com,

629
00:33:55,800 --> 00:34:00,400
Marie.com leave looking up is 
hosted by myself near Ludovic, 

630
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:04,400
and my co-host, Amir Jan Dolly, 
and produced by our small. 

631
00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:08,800
But Mighty team at Moon 31, a 
company dedicated to creating 

632
00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:11,300
platforms for Meaningful 
conversations. 

633
00:34:11,400 --> 00:34:14,699
That tackle the important issues
of today for folks that love 

634
00:34:14,699 --> 00:34:17,400
what they're hearing today and 
want to hear and see more. 

635
00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:21,000
We have the complete uncut and 
raw episodes in video form 

636
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:27,100
available online on our Page by 
patreon at www.levitt.com up.com

637
00:34:27,400 --> 00:34:30,699
fans there, you can support, 
what we're creating here. 

638
00:34:30,699 --> 00:34:33,800
Sound bites, that didn't make it
to the Final Cut gain wisdom 

639
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:37,400
from our guests score. 
Merch, be the first to access 

640
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:41,900
our content and more also we'd 
like to take a second to thank 

641
00:34:41,900 --> 00:34:45,000
you for joining us today. 
So, if you haven't already, 

642
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643
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We also recommend following us 

644
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looking up on all social 

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646
00:34:58,500 --> 00:35:02,600
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episodes, via our website at 

647
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This episode was created through

648
00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:08,500
the combined efforts of myself 
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649
00:35:08,500 --> 00:35:11,800
lead producer, Lucian glow to 
sleep the moon. 31 team also 

650
00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:15,100
includes designer and Draya. 
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651
00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:17,600
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Just inject, Carter an extra 

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Thanks to engineer, TJ, 

653
00:35:19,200 --> 00:35:22,300
dumpster, who mixed and mastered
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654
00:35:22,300 --> 00:35:22,800
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655
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