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Hello. 
Hi everyone. 

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Welcome to the Lesbian Supper 
Club podcast. 

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Before we just had to sort out 
the mics. 

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I was saying because Freya was 
laughing, because I was in a bit

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of a Strop with the mic like 
hanging in between my legs. 

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Because as you'll know if you 
follow us on social media, 

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particularly Instagram at the 
Lesbian Supper Club pod, you 

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would have seen that we couldn't
record last week because the. 

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Laptop broke. 
Oh, it was so shit. 

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Actually, it was really. 
Shit because of someone called 

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Freya Evans. 
You know what, I'm actually not 

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going to take the blame for this
because I put the bed. 

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I put the laptop on the bed to 
save it from getting stepped on.

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And as you moved the laptop. 
You put the laptop, as you often

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done, on the absolute edge of. 
As you often done. 

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As you often do yeah, on the 
absolute edge of the bed. 

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So even if the dog jumps off, I 
really. 

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Don't think anyone cares. 
I really don't. 

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I care. 
I care. 

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I want everyone to know the 
reason that we couldn't record 

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last week was because of you, 
because you are. 

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Does it make you feel good? 
No. 

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But does it make you feel good? 
It. 

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Does actually why it feeds me, 
but why? 

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Because let me tell you why, 
because I would have told you 

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multiple times before the laptop
fell off the bed to either put 

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your laptop on a counter side, 
so not on the floor nor on the 

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bed if you're not specifically 
using it at that point. 

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You are the person with the 
bedside table. 

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It's not my fault that the 
bedside table is absolutely 

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rammed to shit. 
You could buy yourself a bedside

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table. 
I couldn't. 

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I couldn't put a bedside table. 
You'll have to get out of bed 

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then and put it on the kitchen 
table or put it on one of the 

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many shelves that we have in the
living room because we have. 

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Annoying me so much that I 
actually feel like throwing this

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mic at the window like. 
Well, throw the laptop at the 

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window, just go through. 
It yeah, I will. 

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Because then you're you're 
because this is the only time. 

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We've had to. 
I've also had to deal with about

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four weeks guys worth of literal
stress because Freya, right? 

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Also beside it, no. 
I don't think it's actually 

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funny. 
Freya, having had, you know, 

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dropped her iPhone multiple 
times, which isn't the primary 

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all do it, but the back was 
smashed to literal smithereens, 

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decides that she's then, which 
she does on a weekly basis 

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because she still has a slight 
sense of OCD, to bleach the 

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bath. 
And when I tell you this girl 

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bleaches the bath like it gets 
bleach. 

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Yeah, so she's bleached the 
bath. 

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She's filled the bath up 
slightly with bleach water. 

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She has her very cracked open 
back, iPhone in her huge hoodie 

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front pocket leaning over the 
bath. 

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Can I also tell you that two 
weeks prior to this, the phone 

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had fallen in the bath and we'd 
managed to savour it and dry it 

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out. 
Classic rice. 

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She then repeated the same thing
two weeks later, leant over the 

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bath with a bar full of bleach. 
Actually, the iPhone falls in 

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again somehow. 
By the way guys, this is not 

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Freya's fault. 
It's not the the phone then. 

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Breaks. 
It's not my fault. 

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Classic. 
I'm the one that has the 

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insurance and sorts it all out. 
So I had to go through the whole

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insurance thing for her, get the
phone replaced for her. 

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We then have multiple issues 
with the E SIM, which has then 

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been causing you issues for the 
last 2 1/2 weeks. 

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Yeah, so it's been a constant 
technical glitch our life. 

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Over the last it's been so 
fucking shit. 

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Right guys, we're getting into 
the topic now. 

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Grouch has had her rant. 
Yeah, Jesus Christ, Grouch is 

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really on the fucking Grouch 
train today. 

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I guys, I need fucking saving. 
I know there's going to be two 

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sides to this audience. 
One side will sit here and go I 

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am Freya this is me I feel seen 
and the other side will be on my

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like AKA grouch's side and go I 
get it, someone else that I'm 

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around does this all the time 
and yet it is absolutely 

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infuriating. 
OK, we just. 

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All I have to say to that is 
just chill out and maybe you 

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should be drinking the trip 
Right now I'm drinking a trip 

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CBD infused lemon basil lights 
that's. 

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My favourite flavour. 
So good. 

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It's the best flavour for sure. 
And it genuinely does chill me 

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out a bit as well. 
Like it feels just like nice and

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light and I fucking need it. 
So I'm going to have like 10 of 

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them. 
Please do. 

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Hopefully it chills you out into
complete silence. 

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Submission, but I've been 
absolutely fine. 

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Freya, I'm literally not getting
into this with you right now. 

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So guys, it's been a bit of a 
hectic week because we broke the

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laptop, drove down to Cornwall 
to see Freya's mum. 

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That was fun. 
Ended up then going down to our 

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place in Cornwall, which is, by 
the way, our only place, which 

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was a really cheap place that we
renovated. 

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Because I know some people are 
sticklers for believing that 

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we're like privileged white. 
Girls I know. 

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So we ended up going down to 
like our place in Cornwall, 

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which we are now selling because
we had to get some documents. 

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We got down there, the weather 
was bad, even though the weather

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was really nice. 
And then we had an opportunity 

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come up in London that we missed
out on because there was. 

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No, don't. 
It was an opportunity to where 

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girls like the thought of it, 
yeah, makes me so like 

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depressed. 
If you girls knew, if you girls 

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knew what we missed out on, I 
genuinely think that you, you 

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would, I would hear this, the 
cries. 

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You dig the hole for us. 
Yeah, push us in and be like, 

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there you go. 
So I can't really focus on that 

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too much because that was sad. 
It's been a really busy week, 

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hasn't it? 
Freya, do you want to take the 

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pleasure of telling the 
audience? 

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So guys, I swear Cornwall is 
cursed for us. 

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Like because we also found out 
via our neighbour as well. 

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So besides the builders being 
perverts, we also discovered the

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other day. 
I mean I'm not accusing, but 

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money went missing from 
Cornwall, didn't it? 

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Which we forgot. 
We had basically had some cash 

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that my one of my parents had 
given me when we'd first moved 

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in a few years back to help us 
buy furniture that we had left 

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in the kitchen drawer. 
Like at the back of the kitchen 

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drawer. 
When we went back down after a 

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few weeks, some of it was gone. 
Yeah, but me and Freya's 

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memories are so bad. 
The thing is, is that like, but 

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I've said it before, I guess 
like myself, like I'll be like, 

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no, I must have, like, Nah, I 
must have so. 

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Yeah. 
No, I really don't think I did. 

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And all of it's kind of coming 
together. 

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I think the main thing is, is 
that it, I know that we've said 

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it before to you guys, but like 
we feel for you, the people that

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are in like the smaller villages
and the smaller towns, because I

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think because we're so used to 
how liberal people are in London

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that. 
Not all the time, but. 

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Not all the time. 
Majority of the time that is. 

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We do get shocked when we go 
back to places like Cornwall 

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because you're more than likely 
to run into a dickhead. 

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Yeah, right. 
Even in Cornwall, when people 

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are trying to be supportive, 
they don't realise actually how 

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offensive they can be. 
There's also a rumour going 

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round that we have broken up, 
which is just. 

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In Pornwall. 
Funny, it's not even like a 

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social. 
Media break up on the daily, but

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like, not for anyone else to 
know about. 

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We literally never do. 
We've never broken up in our 

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whole relationship, which I 
think is like really rare for 

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lesbian relationships or like 
any relationship. 

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But yeah, there's just this 
really weird rumour going around

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Carbis Bay that. 
These that we've broken. 

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Up. 
Broken up. 

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So that's weird, yeah. 
But yeah, we were exposed to a 

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very strange in very strange 
individual, weren't we, Freya? 

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A few. 
Days ago, weird. 

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I mean, it was, it was just 
weird. 

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I mean, I felt really bad 
because like my mom, little 

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Jilly, she is so cute, right? 
And but she also likes to make 

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me hang out with all of our 
friends whenever we go and visit

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her. 
So like I won't see her for 

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months on end and then I'll go 
over to her place for like 2 

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days and then she's like oh so 
and so is going to come over and

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then we're going to go over to 
theirs. 

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And I'm like oh Mama, I just 
came here to see you. 

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But anyway, there are these 
really cute neighbours of hers. 

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It's like older couple. 
They are adorable. 

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Like, they're like the cutest, 
sweetest people. 

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They're like two of her 
favourite friends. 

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Yeah. 
Yeah, like. 

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That I have of her. 
Yeah, exactly. 

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And then so they invite us over 
for a drink and we'd had the 

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longest day. 
This was the day as well where 

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we missed out on that fucking 
opportunity. 

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It was just whatever and we just
had dinner and I'd opened up a 

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bottle of red and I was like, 
right, well, we'll just bring 

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this over to their house and go 
into their garden. 

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Just. 
Have a drink. 

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Yeah, yeah. 
And we went to go and join them 

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and she had the neighbour had 
her daughter who is like in her 

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40s, fifties and and her husband
there. 

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Can I just say within two 
minutes of meeting this guy? 

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Do you ever just get a vibe She 
fucking? 

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It was Oh my God. 
So I've actually had an, I've 

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had a headache since speaking to
him about a week ago. 

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Met him within the 1st 2 
minutes. 

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Is one of these guys right that 
you know, And I said to my mum 

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later, I was like, do you not 
think he was just like, no, I 

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really didn't think he was going
to be like this. 

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And let me tell you, it happens 
to me and Scarlett all the time 

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because straightaway we had to 
get into the topic of 

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conversation about our house 
because the neighbourhood asked 

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us about it. 
Otherwise, I wouldn't have even 

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brought up the fact that we were
selling this house because I 

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know what men like that get like
with women who are successful, 

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especially young women with no 
man their. 

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Egos already fall into. 
That Oh my God just what a 

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fucking knobhead. 
Like he was just. 

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So as soon as he found out that 
we were selling a property that 

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by the way, was like the 
cheapest property that I could 

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have found, like I'd had a tiny,
tiny bit of savings, and I took 

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the risk to take that tiny bit 
of savings and spend it all and 

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spend it all. 
And we did, we, we literally 

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grafted our little asses off 
during lockdown and it made us a

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bit of a profit like that is it 
right. 

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So it's not like this is some 
big thing anyway. 

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He doesn't know the detail nor 
does the detail matter. 

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So in competition, he then has 
to quickly tell us that he's got

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a 22 foot boat. 
And I'm thinking, I literally 

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couldn't give a fuck, but thank 
you for letting me know. 

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And somehow, somehow we got onto
the subject of having an 

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electric car because we were 
saying that the infrastructure 

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down in Cornwall for electric 
cars is nowhere near as good as 

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London. 
Now I just want to put like APSA

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out there to how problematic 
this world is, right? 

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So personally I believe that in 
my very strong opinion that 

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being a vegan is one of the best
ways you can help a this planet 

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and B minimise suffering to 
animals. 

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So one of the reasons why I 
don't eat meat is because I am 

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so emotionally attached to any 
living thing that I can't not 

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eat meat, right? 
But everyone has a choice and 

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that is their choice there. 
There's a lot of things about 

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this world that you can do. 
You can make choices that you 

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believe lessen the impact on 
various things, whether it be 

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like socio economic impacts, 
climate change impacts, 

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political impact, but there are 
always going to be complications

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or implications to the choices 
that we make. 

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So we have an electric car. 
The main reason we have an 

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electric car is because of 
congestion charges in London so.

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Fight the pollution in London 
as. 

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Well, to help fight the 
pollution, and also because the 

226
00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:32,680
car has dog mode. 
Yeah, you guys know that. 

227
00:11:32,680 --> 00:11:34,640
We're fucking devoted to that 
dog. 

228
00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:38,440
And the Peace of Mind that dog 
mode gives me is like, yeah, 

229
00:11:38,680 --> 00:11:40,520
that's like everything to me, 
right? 

230
00:11:41,880 --> 00:11:45,960
But I'm not completely blind to 
the implications that electrical

231
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:48,880
vehicles have. 
They are not a complete Bo and 

232
00:11:48,880 --> 00:11:53,040
end all option comparatively to 
diesel nor petrol cars. 

233
00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:54,800
And I've never been under that 
illusion. 

234
00:11:54,800 --> 00:11:58,520
OK, so we briefly say to this 
guy, oh, the infrastructure is 

235
00:11:58,520 --> 00:12:02,080
really bad, have an electric 
car, do you? 

236
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:05,360
That's gonna piss me off. 
That's gonna piss me. 

237
00:12:05,680 --> 00:12:09,840
Off as I don't give a fear 
whether it pisses you off here 

238
00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:11,960
we. 
Oh my God. 

239
00:12:12,160 --> 00:12:17,280
So we're like, yeah, we do. 
He starts going on. 

240
00:12:17,480 --> 00:12:23,000
Can I just say like this is an 
outward like right wing, like 

241
00:12:23,000 --> 00:12:28,680
benefiting off of that the 
suffering of others directly or 

242
00:12:28,680 --> 00:12:34,200
indirectly indirectly in maximum
capacity type of human being a 

243
00:12:34,240 --> 00:12:38,200
straight white boomer like the 
level of privilege right that 

244
00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,320
you like you can't get any more 
privilege. 

245
00:12:41,360 --> 00:12:42,480
No, you can't. 
No. 

246
00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:48,400
So he starts to lecture me, well
both of us, on how lithium 

247
00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:53,760
batteries are obtained as if 
he's not got an iPhone literally

248
00:12:53,760 --> 00:12:58,560
sat on the table and as if he 
doesn't own a literal boat which

249
00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:03,000
consumes a lot of power, oil, 
energy, etcetera. 

250
00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:06,360
As if he has never gone on an 
aeroplane before. 

251
00:13:06,720 --> 00:13:09,320
Like, do you know what I mean? 
Like. 

252
00:13:09,520 --> 00:13:13,960
I do you know what though? 
This all goes like he's, he said

253
00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:15,920
so much, which like we're 
obviously not going to get into 

254
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,760
because it's fucking long. 
But what I'm so sick of people 

255
00:13:18,760 --> 00:13:23,160
doing is that they will see you 
do something right and they 

256
00:13:23,280 --> 00:13:25,720
will. 
People like this will try to 

257
00:13:25,720 --> 00:13:29,280
make someone feel small and 
stupid because they think that 

258
00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:31,760
we believe that we're changing 
the earth because we're driving 

259
00:13:31,800 --> 00:13:33,960
an electric car. 
But instead of actually pointing

260
00:13:33,960 --> 00:13:38,240
the finger at the larger issues 
that are going on within the 

261
00:13:38,240 --> 00:13:40,520
world, within the larger 
organisations, the leaders that 

262
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:44,600
there are, people love to poke 
holes and to make people feel 

263
00:13:44,600 --> 00:13:46,920
small that are literally like 
points at. 

264
00:13:47,240 --> 00:13:50,840
Each other, yes, And it's so 
fucking dumb and it's 

265
00:13:50,840 --> 00:13:53,040
exhausting. 
Like it comes into cancer 

266
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:56,160
culture right as well. 
Like if all of us spend as much 

267
00:13:56,160 --> 00:14:01,520
time pointing fingers upwards as
we do each other about stupid 

268
00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:04,320
things we've all said in the 
past or stupid shit that we've 

269
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:06,080
all done. 
I'm not talking about dangerous 

270
00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:07,880
stuff, I'm talking about stupid 
stuff. 

271
00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:10,320
The world would probably be a 
different place, but I think 

272
00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:13,040
everyone has got so much hate 
and stress inside of them. 

273
00:14:13,040 --> 00:14:15,360
Instead of looking and 
channelling that in the right 

274
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:19,240
areas, we challenge it at each 
other and that's a really 

275
00:14:19,240 --> 00:14:21,480
dangerous thing. 
We were sat right next to the 

276
00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:22,840
river. 
I would have loved nothing more 

277
00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:24,840
to drop kit times off the 
fucking curb. 

278
00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:27,480
You know I'm I'm not for 
aggression, but in some 

279
00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:29,800
capacities I am. 
Sometimes I just need a good 

280
00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:32,240
sleep. 
Wish nothing more than my dad 

281
00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:36,000
being there because he would 
have just uppercutted him 

282
00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,480
straight into the estuary. 
And I would have. 

283
00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:42,120
I would have had he would. 
Have gated him he. 100% but the 

284
00:14:42,120 --> 00:14:45,280
best part, and this is kind of 
how it feeds into our wider 

285
00:14:45,280 --> 00:14:47,440
conversation. 
Love it is. 

286
00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:50,520
He then starts going on some 
other rant. 

287
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:52,000
About. 
Population. 

288
00:14:52,000 --> 00:14:55,280
Population because. 
Obviously, Mr Wanting to save 

289
00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:57,920
the planet of climate change 
wants everyone to have fucking 

290
00:14:57,920 --> 00:15:00,200
children. 
Saying how important procreation

291
00:15:00,320 --> 00:15:03,320
is, and obviously it doesn't 
take a fucking genius to 

292
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:06,600
understand that the problem with
this earth largely is the fact 

293
00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:09,720
we're hugely overpopulated and 
we cannot feed the number of 

294
00:15:09,720 --> 00:15:11,160
people that we have in this 
world. 

295
00:15:12,520 --> 00:15:15,720
So he goes on to ask us. 
I think he just realised that we

296
00:15:15,720 --> 00:15:17,240
were together, hadn't we? 
Yeah. 

297
00:15:17,760 --> 00:15:21,680
If we were going to have 
children and we simply said, you

298
00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:25,320
know, we're not sure yet, it's 
not something we've really 

299
00:15:25,320 --> 00:15:27,920
focused on too early. 
For I was thinking straight 

300
00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:30,360
away, here we fucking go. 
He's asking us if we're going to

301
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,600
have children. 
He then goes on to tell us how 

302
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:36,280
it's an epidemic, that the white
man is a dying breed. 

303
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:41,400
And I was thinking, well, if 
that's part of you, get a 

304
00:15:41,400 --> 00:15:44,880
fucking shifty. 
I swear to God, this is how it's

305
00:15:45,120 --> 00:15:46,320
disgusting. 
Terrific. 

306
00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,520
I was trying. 
I was, so I was so desperately 

307
00:15:48,520 --> 00:15:50,000
trying to not be in the 
conversation. 

308
00:15:50,000 --> 00:15:51,160
So I was kind of like in and 
out. 

309
00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:53,440
I was like trying to, I 
literally was asking the 

310
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:55,480
neighbour about her flowers. 
I don't know anything about 

311
00:15:55,480 --> 00:15:56,360
flowers. 
I'm sadly. 

312
00:15:56,440 --> 00:16:00,480
We're desperately like, so to 
turn it on its head, he goes, 

313
00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:02,320
well, you have to have children.
You have to. 

314
00:16:02,480 --> 00:16:05,280
And to turn it on its head, 
Freyo M do you know what? 

315
00:16:05,520 --> 00:16:08,280
It's actually really nice that 
you would encourage us to have 

316
00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:12,360
children because a lot of 
people, because we're gay, will 

317
00:16:12,720 --> 00:16:16,440
tell us not to. 
And you saw the penny drop. 

318
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:21,400
And like, he was then fucking 
furious that he had 

319
00:16:21,440 --> 00:16:26,720
inadvertently supported the 
LGBTQ plus community. 

320
00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:28,720
Afraid. 
I was like no, no, no, no, no, 

321
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:31,640
thank you. 
The way you said it was amazing.

322
00:16:31,640 --> 00:16:32,760
But. 
No, thank you. 

323
00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:34,680
No. 
Thank you so much. 

324
00:16:34,680 --> 00:16:36,040
And he was like. 
No. 

325
00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,720
Oh, I said no, no, I'll give it 
to you. 

326
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:40,040
I think that's really big of you
to say that. 

327
00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:44,240
No, no it's not. 
I'm not supporting the LGBT. 

328
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,840
Oh, this was it. 
The oh, are you part of the 

329
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:51,280
LGBTQIA Plus 25 things 
community? 

330
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:54,240
Fucking guys wanker. 
I can't say it enough. 

331
00:16:54,600 --> 00:17:00,160
This is a person who will say 
that but then it's the same as 

332
00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:05,240
like Trump supporters right? 
Or like these really right wing 

333
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:09,520
Americans who are pro like but 
then also won't change gun law. 

334
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:13,800
And it's like. 
You're literally outdone 

335
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,440
yourself. 
Yeah, but they always say you 

336
00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:17,240
always want to protect your kids
until they're born. 

337
00:17:17,400 --> 00:17:19,400
Yeah, right. 
Which is so true. 

338
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:22,359
It's it's so fucked. 
Yeah, Well, that's why they're 

339
00:17:22,359 --> 00:17:24,520
trying to. 
That's why they're overriding a 

340
00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:27,440
lot of trans rights over in 
America because they believe 

341
00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:30,640
that it's helping the children. 
And yet they are, you know, 

342
00:17:30,720 --> 00:17:32,680
children are getting shot in 
schools. 

343
00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:35,360
So please, please make it make 
sense to me. 

344
00:17:35,360 --> 00:17:39,080
Because it just can't. 
I'm so fucking sick of this 

345
00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:41,640
earth. 
Like get get me to fuck off. 

346
00:17:41,840 --> 00:17:45,520
Like it is crazy. 
And people like him, honestly, 

347
00:17:46,560 --> 00:17:49,480
there's no talking to them, 
there's no arguing with them 

348
00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:51,440
because they will pick a fight 
out of everything. 

349
00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:54,600
So I just sat there. 
People like that are actually 

350
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:58,200
the climate epidemic because 
they're breathing our air, but 

351
00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:01,920
they're thick. 
We can look outward into society

352
00:18:02,240 --> 00:18:07,920
and see so many now, not enough,
but so many positive role models

353
00:18:08,880 --> 00:18:12,520
in the queer community, so many 
successful people in the queer 

354
00:18:12,520 --> 00:18:15,520
community, so many people living
an incredible life. 

355
00:18:16,640 --> 00:18:21,760
But if your Direct Line of 
communication and experience in 

356
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:25,200
this world, which is your peers 
and your family, are not 

357
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:28,840
liberating those experiences. 
Oh, it's fucking hard. 

358
00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:31,000
And are speaking in the complete
opposite. 

359
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:34,840
Actually, The level of 
confliction that that will give 

360
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:37,160
you is is insurmountable. 
Yeah, yeah. 

361
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:40,040
No, it's, it's crazy. 
Because that's where your knee 

362
00:18:40,040 --> 00:18:43,240
jerk goes, right? 
It's like that is your Bible a 

363
00:18:43,240 --> 00:18:46,560
lot of the time. 
Like our parents are our Bible. 

364
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:50,400
And actually I was really lucky,
despite both of my parents 

365
00:18:50,400 --> 00:18:55,760
growing up in relatively 
difficult conditions, are both 

366
00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,520
separately really intelligent 
individuals? 

367
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:02,680
Yeah, also like some 
intelligence, like it can't be 

368
00:19:02,680 --> 00:19:04,760
taught, you know, like you can. 
You can just be. 

369
00:19:04,760 --> 00:19:07,280
Bored social intelligence. 
Yeah, with like an intelligence.

370
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:10,160
And I do think like this whole 
like streetwise thing. 

371
00:19:10,360 --> 00:19:11,840
That's fucking that you often 
you. 

372
00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:16,040
Need that from being exposed to 
different pockets of society 

373
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:18,360
goes a long fucking way. 
Yeah, it. 

374
00:19:18,480 --> 00:19:20,040
Does because you're bullshit. 
Raiders. 

375
00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:22,760
I've got an absolutely 
incredible bullshit Raider. 

376
00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:25,800
Love that shit, yeah. 
That stuff goes really quite 

377
00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:27,840
far, I would argue. 
Yeah, yeah, for sure. 

378
00:19:28,120 --> 00:19:31,400
I think. 
Yeah, but ultimately, get them 

379
00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:35,920
to listen to this podcast to do 
something, get them to do any 

380
00:19:35,920 --> 00:19:38,120
form of research. 
It's really hard sometimes. 

381
00:19:38,120 --> 00:19:39,760
It's like banging your head 
against the wall. 

382
00:19:39,760 --> 00:19:42,720
But it does come to a point 
where people do understand, I 

383
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:45,320
think as well. 
It's a big hot take here, but if

384
00:19:45,320 --> 00:19:48,200
someone is outwardly homophobic 
and like quite a lot, like if 

385
00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:51,000
they always go on about gay 
people and how disgusting they 

386
00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:55,720
are, whatever, they're gay, you 
will not, you will not find 

387
00:19:55,800 --> 00:20:00,040
someone like that who isn't gay.
That is internalised homophobia 

388
00:20:00,040 --> 00:20:02,360
to the fucking Max because it's 
like. 

389
00:20:03,200 --> 00:20:04,200
Why do you care so much? 
Oh. 

390
00:20:04,280 --> 00:20:06,520
My God, they think about gay 
people more than I do, and I 

391
00:20:06,520 --> 00:20:08,200
think about gay people all the 
fucking time. 

392
00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:11,400
Yeah, they are like. 
Obsessed, obsessed, obsessed. 

393
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:13,880
Because it's a constant wave of 
thought. 

394
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,720
It's an. 
Internal fight, isn't it? 

395
00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:17,840
Yeah, and that's why they're so.
Mad about it? 

396
00:20:17,880 --> 00:20:19,520
It's like a diet. 
Yeah. 

397
00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:22,080
It's like as soon as you go on a
diet, yeah. 

398
00:20:22,080 --> 00:20:23,560
And you know you can't have 
something. 

399
00:20:23,560 --> 00:20:25,400
You're fucking hungry. 
All the time. 

400
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:27,440
Basic human psychology. 
I know. 

401
00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:29,720
Well, I've been. 
I've like cut out chocolate 

402
00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:31,880
because. 
I don't think that's the first 

403
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:33,600
time you've. 
Said this on this podcast. 

404
00:20:34,160 --> 00:20:36,320
You cut. 
You cut out chocolate again. 

405
00:20:36,320 --> 00:20:37,880
Yeah, I've cut out chocolate 
again. 

406
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:41,760
And this is, guys, this is 
actually really hard for me. 

407
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:45,880
Like I have such a sweet tooth. 
Like in the evening after I've 

408
00:20:45,880 --> 00:20:48,760
had my dinner, instantly my 
brain goes to like pocket 

409
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:51,080
sweetness in my stomach. 
Like I need something sweet. 

410
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:53,720
And I have gotten into Mars bars
recently and I put them in the 

411
00:20:53,720 --> 00:20:55,680
fridge and they're so fucking, 
which are probably are 

412
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:59,320
delectable. 
They are so fucking good, right?

413
00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:02,760
And it couldn't just be like a 
pocket sized Fredo. 

414
00:21:02,840 --> 00:21:06,040
No, it couldn't, because also 
with the economic crisis, I'm 

415
00:21:06,040 --> 00:21:08,120
not buying a fucking economic. 
Is it an economic? 

416
00:21:08,120 --> 00:21:10,320
It is an economic, yeah. 
Fair enough. 

417
00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:12,920
It actually is. 
Fredos are now like what £100? 

418
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,880
I'm not going to fucking buy, 
I'm going to get my 4 pack of 

419
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:17,160
fast bars. 
For. 

420
00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:19,240
A pound. 
That is fair. 

421
00:21:19,280 --> 00:21:22,040
Yeah. 
And I fucking yeah. 

422
00:21:22,040 --> 00:21:25,160
So I've cut it out because I'm 
like, no, Ginobot fryer. 

423
00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:29,800
You're a grown woman. 
You don't need this today, and 

424
00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:32,240
you don't need to have this in 
the evening after your dinner, 

425
00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:34,280
like a little treat. 
Because you know what? 

426
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,160
You have a lot of treats in your
life. 

427
00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:38,000
No, no, no. 
I want to stop you right there. 

428
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:41,280
This isn't actually Freya can 
can we just because like this is

429
00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:44,120
a bit of a trigger warning like 
what you're talking about here. 

430
00:21:44,160 --> 00:21:46,440
No one is saying for a second 
that you should be cutting 

431
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:49,080
calories. 
The problem is is Freya has an 

432
00:21:49,160 --> 00:21:52,280
insulin problem. 
It's not an insulin problem. 

433
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:55,600
It is darling, because it's not,
I believe. 

434
00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:57,760
I've got 1/4 sole issue. 
That's it. 

435
00:21:57,760 --> 00:21:59,200
Quarter sole, sorry. 
Yeah. 

436
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:03,560
Which is linked to sugars in the
body though that when Freya is 

437
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:07,080
caning a Mars bar sometimes at 
10:00 PM at night. 

438
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,280
It's not just after dinner, 
Freya. 

439
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:12,160
Sometimes you get through 2/1 
after dinner, one at 10:00 PM. 

440
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:17,040
She's then waking up at three, 
4:00 in the morning with heart 

441
00:22:17,040 --> 00:22:19,880
palpitations, which obviously is
because of the sugar. 

442
00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:22,920
So this isn't about like you 
not, this isn't about the 

443
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:25,360
chocolate. 
No, about what it's like. 

444
00:22:25,360 --> 00:22:27,520
It's not personal. 
It's not personal to the Mars 

445
00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:29,240
Bar. 
No, it's just eat as many Mars 

446
00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:31,720
bars as you want within a 
certain time frame that isn't 

447
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,600
10:00 at. 9 so you're caught it.
I really want doesn't spine 

448
00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:38,160
craving one, but but I also 
think that it's good to like not

449
00:22:38,160 --> 00:22:40,400
from a diet perspective, but 
like just trying to cut down the

450
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:44,920
sugar in my intake just mainly 
because I want to feel my best. 

451
00:22:45,360 --> 00:22:48,760
I want to feel like I'm getting 
older and I and I want to look 

452
00:22:48,760 --> 00:22:51,160
my best, want to feel my best. 
So that's what I'm going to do. 

453
00:22:51,160 --> 00:22:53,760
I I get it because I used to 
have that same problem. 

454
00:22:53,760 --> 00:22:56,240
Like a real sweet tooth addict, 
I used to get through a packet 

455
00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:58,760
of Maryland cookies every 
morning for breakfast and then a

456
00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:00,200
big bar of chocolate. 
After dinner. 

457
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:01,960
What a good start to the day. 
Oh, it was. 

458
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:05,000
It was fantastic. 
And I completely agree. 

459
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,960
It's that thing like as soon as 
you put down your fork of the 

460
00:23:08,040 --> 00:23:10,760
savoury dinner, it starts to 
trickle. 

461
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:12,760
In I could be so trying to. 
Ignore it. 

462
00:23:12,760 --> 00:23:15,760
Yeah, and it just gets bigger 
and bigger and bigger until you 

463
00:23:15,760 --> 00:23:17,680
crack and then you're like an 
addict. 

464
00:23:17,680 --> 00:23:20,280
But that's what I mean. 
I am like an addict, but it is 

465
00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:22,920
addictive. 
I'm like a gay homophobe right 

466
00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:25,200
now, but for chocolate. 
So that chocolate right now, 

467
00:23:25,200 --> 00:23:27,200
that Mars bar is spinning around
in my head all day. 

468
00:23:27,200 --> 00:23:28,920
This must be how they feel. 
Yeah. 

469
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:32,320
That gay people spinning around 
their heads or 100% of them 

470
00:23:32,320 --> 00:23:35,320
absolutely nuts, 100% cocks 
flying everywhere. 

471
00:23:38,120 --> 00:23:41,800
But This is why, yeah, I believe
that they are gay. 

472
00:23:42,040 --> 00:23:43,840
Yeah, homophobes are gay. 
So it's my take. 

473
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:48,000
Talking about like homophobia 
then and you know, internalised 

474
00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:51,880
homophobia, the community 
experiences etcetera. 

475
00:23:52,480 --> 00:23:58,480
A lot of you have written in and
asked us to discuss being gay in

476
00:23:58,480 --> 00:24:00,880
the workplace, and I'm going to 
assume you've asked us to 

477
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:04,560
discuss this from a perspective 
of not being out in the 

478
00:24:04,560 --> 00:24:06,560
workplace. 
So how do you come out in the 

479
00:24:06,560 --> 00:24:11,720
workplace and how do you ensure 
that you're safe being gay in 

480
00:24:11,720 --> 00:24:15,600
the workplace? 
Look, it really I understand 

481
00:24:15,600 --> 00:24:17,360
that this is this is a hard 
thing to do. 

482
00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:21,720
Even if you are already out and 
proud in your life, there may 

483
00:24:21,720 --> 00:24:25,440
still be that element in you 
that is like, I'm in my 

484
00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:28,560
professional workspace and I'm 
scared that this is going to 

485
00:24:28,560 --> 00:24:31,960
tarnish something or it might be
like an awkward conversation. 

486
00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:36,240
I've actually got a really funny
story about when I accidentally 

487
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:40,640
came out to the whole director 
of my organisation by accident 

488
00:24:41,240 --> 00:24:43,200
because I thought that everyone 
already knew. 

489
00:24:43,200 --> 00:24:47,160
Like, I'm so gay that I just 
assumed that everyone knew. 

490
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:49,920
Yeah. 
And I remember they were doing 

491
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:52,640
this. 
It was like this, like, big 

492
00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:56,200
team, like day out. 
And we were all sat in like the 

493
00:24:56,200 --> 00:24:58,400
hottest room in the fucking 
world. 

494
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:03,320
And they did this presentation 
about gay rights and they had 

495
00:25:03,320 --> 00:25:07,160
this this show that they put on 
about this guy who's Aceo, but 

496
00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:10,080
also is like a drag queen in his
spare time and all this kind of 

497
00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:10,800
stuff. 
I remember. 

498
00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:14,200
And then then the presentation 
ended. 

499
00:25:15,320 --> 00:25:19,120
And then anyone was like, if 
anyone has anything to say, just

500
00:25:19,120 --> 00:25:22,720
like stand up and say it. 
And in the quietest fucking hall

501
00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:27,560
ever, I move my chair as it 
screeches on the floor. 

502
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:33,920
I stand up and I say when I was 
a gay woman instantly I heard 

503
00:25:34,120 --> 00:25:40,440
everyone's chair and body move 
like boom look I like stare at 

504
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:44,920
me and I then I realised I was 
like shit these people didn't 

505
00:25:44,920 --> 00:25:47,120
know that I was gay and I was 
and I was looking at everyone. 

506
00:25:47,120 --> 00:25:49,440
I mean that everyone was smiling
like it was a really good 

507
00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:51,400
response. 
It was so fucking funny how 

508
00:25:51,600 --> 00:25:54,640
everyone just went as soon as I 
said gay woman. 

509
00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:57,880
Necessarily a negative thing. 
Yeah, I still find it really 

510
00:25:57,880 --> 00:26:00,280
fucking. 
I wag my tail when another dog 

511
00:26:00,280 --> 00:26:03,920
dyke walks in the room 100% but 
it was so funny because then and

512
00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:06,040
then they all gave. 
I was like, oh I think this is 

513
00:26:06,040 --> 00:26:07,760
great, blah blah. 
They all gave me like this like 

514
00:26:07,760 --> 00:26:10,960
round of applause after this 
finish this Irish not. 

515
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:13,680
The gay round of. 
Applause this Irish Jan and 

516
00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,080
found me afterwards and was 
like, I thought I was the only 

517
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:18,480
gay in here. 
She's like, I'm so glad to find 

518
00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:20,520
another dyke. 
I was like, that's amazing. 

519
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:22,800
I was like hey. 
And she's like, I was like, oh, 

520
00:26:22,800 --> 00:26:24,640
I didn't know you were gay. 
I mean, I was like, she's like, 

521
00:26:24,920 --> 00:26:26,160
really? 
You didn't know I was gay. 

522
00:26:26,520 --> 00:26:27,840
You didn't. 
I was like, no, I didn't know 

523
00:26:27,840 --> 00:26:32,120
you were gay. 
I mean, but no, it was, it was 

524
00:26:32,120 --> 00:26:34,000
really, really funny and it was 
so nice. 

525
00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:35,960
It was a really, really positive
experience. 

526
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:38,800
But I understand that not every 
organisation is like that, and 

527
00:26:38,800 --> 00:26:40,960
not every organisation is as 
protected. 

528
00:26:41,000 --> 00:26:44,440
And even if it is, I understand 
that you want to know as well, 

529
00:26:44,440 --> 00:26:46,360
like how to come out. 
Because yeah, a lot of you 

530
00:26:46,360 --> 00:26:49,840
wouldn't want to come out in 
such like a grand fucking way of

531
00:26:49,840 --> 00:26:51,360
doing it, like. 
Well, this is the thing. 

532
00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:55,000
So like I would say, first of 
all, your safety is everything. 

533
00:26:55,720 --> 00:27:00,000
So you know, for me, I've always
been out in the workplace as 

534
00:27:00,000 --> 00:27:03,680
well because I've been extremely
lucky because I've known that 

535
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:07,360
the people around me have been 
supportive and would be 

536
00:27:07,360 --> 00:27:10,160
supportive. 
And I know that I'm backed by 

537
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,680
policies that I will spend hours
fucking reading to ensure I'm 

538
00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:16,440
protected. 
And if anyone were to even 

539
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:20,080
fucking dare look at me wrong, 
best believe my ass is going 

540
00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:21,880
straight to the fucking top of 
HR. 

541
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:24,320
So safety is absolutely 
everything. 

542
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:29,160
So I think you need to really 
assess a your workplace. 

543
00:27:29,400 --> 00:27:31,360
So do you think it's a safe 
workplace? 

544
00:27:31,880 --> 00:27:36,080
Read up on the policies and the 
like pledges of your workplace. 

545
00:27:36,080 --> 00:27:40,600
You know that your your 
contract, your protections, HR 

546
00:27:40,600 --> 00:27:43,960
policies. 
Make sure that you have clear 

547
00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:48,640
routes of escalation. 
Find a friend or a contact 

548
00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:51,680
within HR. 
See if your organisation has an 

549
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:55,240
LGBTQ plus group. 
Find allies. 

550
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:59,360
You can be even an ally of the 
LGBTQ plus group before you even

551
00:27:59,360 --> 00:28:00,880
have to be out. 
You could just be. 

552
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:04,640
Part of the group. 
Just to assess the safety and 

553
00:28:04,640 --> 00:28:08,080
the kind of liberation, I 
suppose of your organisation. 

554
00:28:08,440 --> 00:28:13,000
And then once you've are 
confident in that, that's how 

555
00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:15,720
you then have to learn to be 
confident in yourself to come 

556
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,160
out. 
And that rule then, you know, 

557
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,880
we've said this before, the same
rule applies to coming out in a 

558
00:28:19,880 --> 00:28:24,680
workplace as it does to anything
else in your life of being or 

559
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:27,280
coming out, you know, I. 
Used to just like, I think if 

560
00:28:27,280 --> 00:28:29,400
you just like drop in the fact 
that you've got a partner and 

561
00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:33,120
then when they ask, but then I 
always have to correct, yeah, 

562
00:28:33,120 --> 00:28:34,760
the partner thing because then I
say partner. 

563
00:28:34,800 --> 00:28:36,880
I just say my girlfriend 
straight away, Yeah, or 

564
00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:38,560
girlfriend I just say. 
Fuck it. 

565
00:28:38,560 --> 00:28:40,720
Or my wife, My girlfriend. 
That's the thing, guys, like 

566
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:43,680
when you're gonna come to us for
advice on these things, you 

567
00:28:43,680 --> 00:28:47,080
know, we, you're talking to two 
people who like are like balls 

568
00:28:47,080 --> 00:28:49,840
in a China shop when it comes to
homophobia. 

569
00:28:49,840 --> 00:28:51,160
But it doesn't mean that you 
can't get that. 

570
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:52,120
No. 
And I and this. 

571
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,160
Is I never used to be yes. 
So like. 

572
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:58,480
So once you know you're 
protected, OK, let's take up a 

573
00:28:58,480 --> 00:29:01,040
scenario here. 
The Cornwall cock that we had to

574
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:04,520
deal with a few weeks ago or a 
few days ago, sorry, sadly 

575
00:29:04,520 --> 00:29:06,720
happens to be within your 
organisation. 

576
00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:09,520
And and this is the thing, these
people are existing in your 

577
00:29:09,520 --> 00:29:12,840
organisation. 
You come out and this person 

578
00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:15,080
starts to act or treat you 
differently. 

579
00:29:15,640 --> 00:29:17,240
OK, I'm going to say what I 
would do. 

580
00:29:17,240 --> 00:29:19,520
My ass is going straight to HR 
and flagging it. 

581
00:29:19,520 --> 00:29:23,840
OK, even if I don't have proof, 
I'm going straight to HR and 

582
00:29:23,840 --> 00:29:25,240
I'm. 
I'm flagging it. 

583
00:29:25,480 --> 00:29:32,080
Yeah, I am then logging every 
single microaggression, comment,

584
00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:35,120
behaviour, work or non work 
related. 

585
00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:37,000
So are they starting to shit on 
your work more? 

586
00:29:37,000 --> 00:29:38,880
Are they starting to micromanage
you more? 

587
00:29:38,960 --> 00:29:41,960
You know, these are all 
inadvertent signs of homophobia.

588
00:29:42,040 --> 00:29:45,360
That's the problem. 
And I'm hassling and I will not 

589
00:29:45,360 --> 00:29:48,160
go down without a fight. 
And you know, this is the thing 

590
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:50,760
where you have to really 
understand that the organisation

591
00:29:50,760 --> 00:29:54,480
in which you are in as well. 
If you're working for a really 

592
00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:58,800
small building company, for 
example, it's probably not going

593
00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:00,640
to be that great for you if 
you're. 

594
00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:02,840
If they're not positive when you
come out, I mean. 

595
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:04,880
Yeah, in terms of they could be,
but yeah. 

596
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,360
If. 
You're working for even a medium

597
00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:10,760
level enterprise. 
There's a lot of power to the 

598
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:13,480
people. 
And also think about like social

599
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:17,840
media, like there's so much that
like organisations will do these

600
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:21,040
days to protect themselves. 
But again, acknowledge. 

601
00:30:21,080 --> 00:30:24,200
They're doing talk about them. 
Yeah, but again, acknowledge the

602
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:27,440
privilege in which we are coming
from because like not every 

603
00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:31,280
organisation is like that. 
No, and also like it is so 

604
00:30:31,280 --> 00:30:32,880
different. 
I know that we've got so many 

605
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,560
American listeners and by the 
way, I love you all. 

606
00:30:35,560 --> 00:30:39,560
This is so different in America.
The laws that the laws when it 

607
00:30:39,560 --> 00:30:42,280
comes to work in America, like 
you can get fired for anything. 

608
00:30:42,640 --> 00:30:45,000
Like you can just for nothing. 
You can literally back. 

609
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:47,000
You're fired. 
But This is why I'm saying. 

610
00:30:47,000 --> 00:30:49,200
Problem. 
You know, and I'm not asking 

611
00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:53,000
anyone to stay closeted, but no,
what is the burning desire to be

612
00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:56,560
out in terms of like, if you 
know these people are assholes, 

613
00:30:57,040 --> 00:31:00,000
even even if you weren't gay, if
you're telling me you're working

614
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:02,000
in a place where you know these 
people are assholes and you're 

615
00:31:02,000 --> 00:31:04,520
not protected, start looking for
a new job, right? 

616
00:31:04,640 --> 00:31:06,080
Irrespective for sure you're gay
or not. 

617
00:31:06,080 --> 00:31:09,400
Yeah, if you are gay, does it 
really matter if these fucking 

618
00:31:09,400 --> 00:31:10,800
bigots know if you're gay or 
not? 

619
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:13,800
Not really. 
Would I, Am I encouraging anyone

620
00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:16,120
to go out of their way to hide A
sense of them, a part of 

621
00:31:16,120 --> 00:31:17,280
themselves? 
No, I'm not. 

622
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:18,840
But I'm talking about safety 
here. 

623
00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:22,280
I'm talking about you keeping 
yourself protected. 

624
00:31:22,480 --> 00:31:26,520
But then say what? 
But then So what is the other 

625
00:31:26,520 --> 00:31:30,400
colleague that's there that's 
not out and is feeling bad about

626
00:31:30,400 --> 00:31:32,760
themselves? 
Like I feel like we should be 

627
00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:34,240
out. 
The more people that are out, 

628
00:31:34,240 --> 00:31:35,800
the better the. 
Stronger, it gets the. 

629
00:31:35,800 --> 00:31:38,120
Stronger it gets so really I 
don't think that we should hide 

630
00:31:38,120 --> 00:31:39,200
ourselves. 
I don't think that we should 

631
00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:41,600
hide that part of our sexuality.
I understand what you're saying,

632
00:31:41,600 --> 00:31:44,160
like I totally do. 
But when you say what's the 

633
00:31:44,160 --> 00:31:46,520
point, well, there's a massive 
point because they're. 

634
00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:49,920
Agreed, but there could be 5. 
Others within their organisation

635
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:53,240
deposited as well and you need 
to form. 

636
00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,640
A change doesn't happen, right? 
Doesn't happen without people 

637
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:59,760
being out, you know, they are 
your colleagues, your cousins, 

638
00:31:59,760 --> 00:32:02,720
your neighbours, your friends, 
your mums, your daughters, 

639
00:32:02,720 --> 00:32:04,440
whatever. 
They're all gay, right? 

640
00:32:04,440 --> 00:32:08,920
All of these people are gay. 
You, you have to be able to 

641
00:32:08,920 --> 00:32:12,480
express that. 
We understand that safety is at 

642
00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:17,160
like the utmost priority here. 
But I think it is such like a 

643
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:19,600
case by case thing. 
Let's say for instance, then 

644
00:32:19,600 --> 00:32:22,200
that you are in, you are in an 
organisation where you feel 

645
00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:25,400
like, I think it'll be OK to 
come out right now. 

646
00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:27,840
We got to talk about like the 
steps of how you do that if you 

647
00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:30,360
wanted to come out in the 
workplace or like feeling 

648
00:32:30,360 --> 00:32:32,680
confident in the workplace. 
The thing is with me is that 

649
00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:34,960
like whenever people ask me 
about my partner, I'm always 

650
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:39,120
like, yeah, she Scala. 
Like I always just say it as it 

651
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:42,840
is completely LGBTQ plus. 
Lanyards are quite a. 

652
00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:45,160
Good, they are good. 
Good old rainbow around. 

653
00:32:45,160 --> 00:32:48,960
You a badge on your blazer that 
says you know I'm a lesbian. 

654
00:32:49,800 --> 00:32:51,400
Bring coffee. 
Just lesbian. 

655
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:53,480
Supper club lesbian. 
That's such a good idea. 

656
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:57,040
Let's be super club like you. 
Know those sorts of things are 

657
00:32:57,040 --> 00:33:00,760
like good because you could say 
you're an ally or you know, in 

658
00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:02,520
the UK for example, you could 
say it's because you're 

659
00:33:02,520 --> 00:33:04,240
supporting the NHS, but it could
also. 

660
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:06,960
Just be an annoying. 
I know it's so fucking annoying 

661
00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:10,720
not even getting into that, but 
like, it could be a signal to 

662
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:12,000
someone else. 
Yeah. 

663
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:14,040
So that is like small ways of 
doing it. 

664
00:33:14,120 --> 00:33:16,920
I mean my way, which isn't 
always necessarily the best way,

665
00:33:16,920 --> 00:33:21,560
but I will look people in the 
eye and just say I am a lesbian.

666
00:33:21,680 --> 00:33:26,360
Yeah, and if they were to even 
look me even in an ounce. 

667
00:33:26,360 --> 00:33:31,160
Strangely, after saying that, 
best believe I'm calling it out 

668
00:33:31,160 --> 00:33:32,160
the. 
Claws are coming. 

669
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:32,640
Out. 
Yeah. 

670
00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:34,720
And I know, again, that that 
comes. 

671
00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:37,920
Yeah, I'm so blessed to know 
that I could do that. 

672
00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:39,280
And why do I know that I could 
do that? 

673
00:33:39,280 --> 00:33:41,800
Because I know that my line 
manager would ultimately support

674
00:33:41,800 --> 00:33:44,960
me, I know that my direct 
leadership team would 

675
00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:46,840
ultimately. 
Support me in such a privileged 

676
00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:50,280
position like. 
Extremely, however, I also will 

677
00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:52,200
do that in my day-to-day life as
well. 

678
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:54,080
Same. 
So it's, you know, it's not just

679
00:33:54,080 --> 00:33:58,600
like because I I truly believe. 
Gotta be out and proud, baby. 

680
00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:03,400
Yeah, well, like that bigot cunt
river riverboat queen, he was 

681
00:34:03,400 --> 00:34:09,000
sat there saying to us that we 
as because our podcast is it is 

682
00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:11,159
an LGBTQ plus. 
Today, I'm just going to stop 

683
00:34:11,159 --> 00:34:14,159
you there quickly. 
Yeah, I'm going to eat my own 

684
00:34:14,159 --> 00:34:18,199
words here because when he asked
me what our podcast was, this is

685
00:34:18,199 --> 00:34:20,920
actually the first time in a 
long time that I felt 

686
00:34:20,920 --> 00:34:25,159
intimidated and not comfortable 
to say it is a queer slash 

687
00:34:25,159 --> 00:34:27,000
lesbian podcast. 
And I didn't, did I? 

688
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:32,600
I said it's a culture podcast. 
I'm actually the one who said 

689
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:35,760
that. 
Yeah, and I surprised myself 

690
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:40,639
then because, but when I think 
about it, was it because he 

691
00:34:40,639 --> 00:34:42,520
intimidated me? 
No, it wasn't. 

692
00:34:42,520 --> 00:34:45,560
It was because I was embarrassed
for everyone else sat around the

693
00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:47,040
table. 
You didn't want him to have 

694
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:48,880
another fucking rant though, 
because. 

695
00:34:48,880 --> 00:34:51,040
He only just started departing 
him. 

696
00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:53,719
Yeah, I really was. 
And I knew if I said it was a 

697
00:34:53,719 --> 00:34:56,560
gay or lesbian podcast, he'd go 
off on one again. 

698
00:34:56,639 --> 00:35:00,280
And that that spitting at that 
point and it didn't want to 

699
00:35:00,280 --> 00:35:02,600
expose your mum to that and I 
didn't want to expose your mum's

700
00:35:02,600 --> 00:35:05,800
friends to that. 
So actually I kept quiet, not 

701
00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:10,480
because I felt shame in myself 
or I was hiding because of the 

702
00:35:10,480 --> 00:35:12,200
other people sat around the 
table. 

703
00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:17,800
In hindsight now, looking back, 
part of me does wish that I 

704
00:35:17,800 --> 00:35:20,880
stood up calmly, looked him in 
the eye and said you are one of 

705
00:35:20,880 --> 00:35:24,800
the biggest cunts I've ever met 
in my life, Picked up my wine 

706
00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:27,720
and walked away. 
And looking back now, I wish I 

707
00:35:27,720 --> 00:35:29,720
did. 
Yeah, because I'm actually angry

708
00:35:29,720 --> 00:35:32,520
at myself for that. 
To make others comfortable, I 

709
00:35:32,520 --> 00:35:34,440
sat there. 
Yeah, and I allowed. 

710
00:35:34,440 --> 00:35:36,720
Someone to do it so much, we all
do. 

711
00:35:36,760 --> 00:35:38,880
It that's the first time I've 
done it in a long time, and let 

712
00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:41,600
it be a lesson to me that I'm 
not gonna do it again. 

713
00:35:41,600 --> 00:35:44,840
But going back to what I was 
saying, because because I then 

714
00:35:44,840 --> 00:35:46,160
was like, no, it's a queer 
podcast. 

715
00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:48,160
Like it's a part of the LGBTQ 
plus community. 

716
00:35:48,160 --> 00:35:50,960
It's a lesbian podcast. 
He was like, do you not think 

717
00:35:50,960 --> 00:35:55,000
that you're better off diluting 
that so that you get more more 

718
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,520
like traction and more audience?
Don't you think you're cutting 

719
00:35:57,520 --> 00:36:01,880
out a massive audience? 
And I said, do I fuck think that

720
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:04,400
I'm cutting out a massive 
audience, honestly. 

721
00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:06,840
Like, I love our straight 
listeners, right? 

722
00:36:07,320 --> 00:36:10,920
But how many things do straight 
people fucking have? 

723
00:36:11,040 --> 00:36:13,560
This is a queer podcast. 
This is a lesbian podcast 

724
00:36:13,560 --> 00:36:15,920
because we don't have lesbian 
media. 

725
00:36:15,920 --> 00:36:18,920
Our shows are getting cancelled 
left right and centre. 

726
00:36:19,080 --> 00:36:22,280
There's barely any fucking films
about us unless one of them is 

727
00:36:22,280 --> 00:36:25,920
dying. 
Like we have a lesbian podcast 

728
00:36:26,040 --> 00:36:30,680
because it's fucking needed. 
And pricks like you, I would 

729
00:36:30,680 --> 00:36:34,280
love to shove this mic so far 
down this fucking what was 

730
00:36:34,280 --> 00:36:37,280
amazing just I can't. 
When he said that I calmly 

731
00:36:37,280 --> 00:36:40,640
looked at him and I said well 
considering it's only been out a

732
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:42,760
few months, we've had nearly 
1,000,000 listens. 

733
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:45,480
No I don't think it's. 
And he did shut the. 

734
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:47,680
Fuck up. 
What the fuck is he gonna say? 

735
00:36:47,840 --> 00:36:50,760
I saw the embarrassment on his 
face, honestly. 

736
00:36:50,880 --> 00:36:54,000
But This is why, you know, we 
don't encourage people to review

737
00:36:54,000 --> 00:36:57,440
the podcast, Follow us for 
clout. 

738
00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:01,800
It's because of the poignant yes
that serves to this community. 

739
00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,160
It's the only way we can help 
each other. 

740
00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:07,680
It's am I going to sit here and 
say that I don't find doing this

741
00:37:07,680 --> 00:37:09,960
podcast somewhat self-serving? 
Of course I do. 

742
00:37:09,960 --> 00:37:12,440
I fucking love doing it. 
I love doing you all. 

743
00:37:12,720 --> 00:37:15,280
I'm so excited about the 
opportunities that not only this

744
00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:17,560
brings to us but the widest 
community and all the things we 

745
00:37:17,560 --> 00:37:20,640
can do. 
But genuinely the point why we 

746
00:37:20,640 --> 00:37:24,960
started this was to fight back 
against cunts like this in the 

747
00:37:24,960 --> 00:37:27,520
world, and the only way we can 
do that is by doing it together.

748
00:37:27,600 --> 00:37:29,520
Absolutely. 
Yeah, Yeah, totally. 

749
00:37:29,520 --> 00:37:31,960
And that's why I love, I love 
how everyone comes together and 

750
00:37:31,960 --> 00:37:34,120
everyone's like forming like 
friendships as well with this 

751
00:37:34,120 --> 00:37:36,320
community. 
There's a WhatsApp group by the 

752
00:37:36,320 --> 00:37:37,040
way, that's. 
Been. 

753
00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:38,320
Yeah, there is. 
I love this. 

754
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:42,440
Some incredible people. 
If you are listening to this and

755
00:37:42,440 --> 00:37:47,120
you want to be a part of it, let
us know by DM ING the podcast 

756
00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:51,520
Instagram, which is at lesbian 
Supper Club pod and I will send 

757
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:53,360
your number over to the to the 
WhatsApp. 

758
00:37:53,440 --> 00:37:55,520
And we're going to start 
dropping in on that at points as

759
00:37:55,520 --> 00:37:56,840
well because I think it'll be 
really fun. 

760
00:37:57,840 --> 00:38:00,680
Yeah, honestly. 
We're going back to get in the 

761
00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:02,280
workplace. 
Own your share. 

762
00:38:02,480 --> 00:38:05,120
Yeah, it's the same advice that 
we say about everything it. 

763
00:38:05,160 --> 00:38:09,480
Is but we understand like I hear
you like even if you've got us 

764
00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:11,760
in your ears right now on your 
side of your desk, I do feel. 

765
00:38:11,760 --> 00:38:14,400
Like I can't do that. 
I know that it's uncomfortable 

766
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:18,240
but just know as well that my. 
Best advice is to have a plan in

767
00:38:18,240 --> 00:38:22,360
place, understand your policy 
procedures, read your fucking 

768
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:26,320
contract, know your rights 
beyond your workplace rights, 

769
00:38:26,320 --> 00:38:28,760
know your country's rights 
around protection. 

770
00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:32,160
You know, like in the UK, we 
know that there are specific 

771
00:38:32,280 --> 00:38:36,640
bills for LGBTQ rights. 
Now, are those always adhere to 

772
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:38,640
in the best way? 
No, they're not. 

773
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:41,960
But it gives you strength and 
empowerment to know exactly 

774
00:38:41,960 --> 00:38:44,080
where you stand and where your 
protection lies. 

775
00:38:44,080 --> 00:38:46,040
So that's the first thing that I
would say. 

776
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,760
I mean, look, I totally get it 
because like I also don't want 

777
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:50,720
to make any of you feel like 
shit if you haven't come out of 

778
00:38:50,720 --> 00:38:53,680
the workplace yet because you 
could be the most outest and 

779
00:38:53,680 --> 00:38:55,680
loudest proud lesbian outside of
the workplace. 

780
00:38:55,680 --> 00:38:58,280
So I don't like, I don't want 
you to feel bad for not coming 

781
00:38:58,280 --> 00:39:01,600
out because like I also, so I 
used to work in a bridal shop 

782
00:39:01,800 --> 00:39:05,280
and gave me the same fear that I
used to feel in the PE changing 

783
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:09,640
rooms at school. 
Is that whole thing of wondering

784
00:39:09,640 --> 00:39:11,520
whether girls were going to 
think that was predatory because

785
00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:13,520
I was a lesbian. 
So I felt uncomfortable. 

786
00:39:13,520 --> 00:39:14,520
So you never told them? 
Yeah. 

787
00:39:14,520 --> 00:39:18,280
So I never told anyone, any of 
the customers within this bridal

788
00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:21,640
shop that I was gay because I 
didn't want the women to think 

789
00:39:21,640 --> 00:39:24,160
that I was stood in that 
changing room with them as a 

790
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:26,280
lesbian. 
And even though that sounds 

791
00:39:26,280 --> 00:39:27,840
ridiculous, in my head, it's 
just hilarious. 

792
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:31,240
Isn't it because like men really
sexually assault women yet they 

793
00:39:31,280 --> 00:39:34,680
believe a lesbian were to do it?
And like statistically solution 

794
00:39:34,840 --> 00:39:37,720
way solution, yes. 
But but I never told them 

795
00:39:37,720 --> 00:39:40,200
because I I then felt really 
like guilty. 

796
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:42,240
I'd feel bad, like I didn't want
to put them in an awkward 

797
00:39:42,240 --> 00:39:43,320
position. 
Again, what's that? 

798
00:39:43,720 --> 00:39:44,880
Internalised homophobia? 
Yeah, it. 

799
00:39:45,040 --> 00:39:47,520
Was yeah, it was, but that's 
what I mean. 

800
00:39:47,520 --> 00:39:49,680
But outside of this workplace, 
that was the outest and loudest 

801
00:39:49,680 --> 00:39:52,280
proud lesbian ever. 
So honestly, just this is the 

802
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:54,120
thing that doesn't make you any 
less. 

803
00:39:54,120 --> 00:39:57,160
Gay, it doesn't make you any 
less proud. 

804
00:39:57,200 --> 00:39:59,520
It doesn't make you any less 
strong. 

805
00:39:59,720 --> 00:40:02,160
And this is this is what going 
back to what I was saying at the

806
00:40:02,160 --> 00:40:05,880
start, you know, mid of this 
conversation, why do you want to

807
00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:08,200
be out in the workplace? 
Ask yourself that. 

808
00:40:09,120 --> 00:40:11,960
And if you don't feel it 
actually worth it? 

809
00:40:12,520 --> 00:40:14,840
To be out to a load of 
colleagues that you probably 

810
00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:19,360
fucking hate, then don't do it. 
You know, and I absolutely agree

811
00:40:19,360 --> 00:40:22,240
with your point about setting a 
precedent and trailblazing. 

812
00:40:22,240 --> 00:40:26,600
And OK, so there are masses of 
positives to doing it, but you 

813
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:29,200
also don't have to be that 
person if you don't want to 

814
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:31,800
trailblaze and be out, do that 
for other people. 

815
00:40:32,000 --> 00:40:32,960
You don't. 
You don't have to be. 

816
00:40:32,960 --> 00:40:34,480
Right. 
Does that mean you can't go and 

817
00:40:34,480 --> 00:40:36,200
slap drop and she bar at the 
weekend? 

818
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:39,800
No, you can still go and slap. 
You can go slap drop and she bar

819
00:40:39,800 --> 00:40:41,120
on a fucking Wednesday. 
Absolutely. 

820
00:40:41,600 --> 00:40:43,960
There'll be no one in there, but
you could do it. 

821
00:40:44,960 --> 00:40:46,720
You know I'd be. 
Better off doing it when no 

822
00:40:46,720 --> 00:40:48,440
one's in there to be fair. 
I think we all need to give 

823
00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:51,840
ourselves a break as well of you
know, we all preach about being 

824
00:40:51,840 --> 00:40:55,280
out, being proud, but it's 
everyone's, it's your own 

825
00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:56,640
journey. 
It's your own journey and 

826
00:40:56,640 --> 00:40:58,640
everyone's on like that. 
You're on like a different path 

827
00:40:58,640 --> 00:40:59,920
of it as well. 
And you may feel like you're 

828
00:40:59,920 --> 00:41:02,240
never going to have that 
strength, but believe me, you 

829
00:41:02,240 --> 00:41:04,560
will. 
And that strength does come 

830
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:07,960
later on when you just accept 
yourself more and more and more 

831
00:41:07,960 --> 00:41:11,120
and you see more people that 
look like you, that act like 

832
00:41:11,120 --> 00:41:13,920
you, that are living a very 
similar life to you. 

833
00:41:13,920 --> 00:41:18,120
We are humans of like comfort 
with things that are familiar, 

834
00:41:18,360 --> 00:41:20,200
you know? 
So just listen to these dykes 

835
00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:21,840
and hopefully we can make you 
feel better. 

836
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:25,400
Moving on now to our Horror 
Story, which isn't actually as 

837
00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:28,760
much of A Horror Story as usual,
but I thought it was quite 

838
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:32,680
fitting to this episode. 
Freya, can you please do the 

839
00:41:32,800 --> 00:41:35,320
honours my dear of reading this 
one? 

840
00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:37,160
Yeah. 
Can you give it to me please 

841
00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:38,360
baby? 
Here you go. 

842
00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:40,600
Give it to me. 
I feel like we haven't ripped 

843
00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:42,200
the shit out of each other that 
much in this one. 

844
00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:44,720
What, in this episode? 
Yeah. 

845
00:41:44,880 --> 00:41:47,840
Have you just forgotten the 
start where I literally told you

846
00:41:47,840 --> 00:41:49,320
that? 
You're a technological. 

847
00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:53,000
Killer. 
And you pretended as if I was 

848
00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:55,720
like. 
Can I just say ever ever since 

849
00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:58,240
we've had this argument with 
this guy, I've had a headache 

850
00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:00,640
and it has not gone away. 
And my headaches have been 

851
00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:02,560
better the last couple of days. 
No, but do you know what's even 

852
00:42:02,560 --> 00:42:05,040
weirder? 
I had a dream that I took away 

853
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:09,040
Scarlett's illness that day. 
I had a really bad headache. 

854
00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:11,440
You do say I'm a witch. 
And I've had it every day since 

855
00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:14,360
and she's been fine. 
Ever since I've had a headache 

856
00:42:14,760 --> 00:42:16,360
mine. 
OK I'm not saying they've gone 

857
00:42:16,360 --> 00:42:20,000
completely but I've been 
honestly genuinely debilitated 

858
00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:21,680
for the last 9 weeks pretty 
much. 

859
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:25,120
And now we've got a fucking 
headache and it's all your 

860
00:42:25,120 --> 00:42:26,400
fault. 
It probably is. 

861
00:42:26,400 --> 00:42:30,480
And because let me tell you why 
I hang on to your panty thong 

862
00:42:30,480 --> 00:42:33,160
all night long and like, hold 
your bum. 

863
00:42:33,440 --> 00:42:38,000
I know you do. 
And I think I'm surging energy. 

864
00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:39,800
I think so. 
Because you do say I'm a bit of 

865
00:42:39,800 --> 00:42:40,600
a witch. 
So. 

866
00:42:40,640 --> 00:42:44,000
Maybe I am actually, quite 
literally transferring my 

867
00:42:44,520 --> 00:42:47,560
negative headache energy onto 
you. 

868
00:42:48,240 --> 00:42:49,680
I'm not going to apologise for 
it. 

869
00:42:49,680 --> 00:42:50,920
I'm going to give you some. 
Endometriosis. 

870
00:42:50,920 --> 00:42:53,440
Give me endometriosis. 
I will take, I will. 

871
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:57,560
Me and Freya talk about this all
the time, about how we all 

872
00:42:57,560 --> 00:43:01,560
become accustomed to our pain. 
So Freya obviously suffers with 

873
00:43:01,560 --> 00:43:05,720
endometriosis and I cannot for a
second imagine how absolutely 

874
00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:09,000
horrific that is. 
Like it pains me to know that 

875
00:43:09,000 --> 00:43:11,920
someone I love so much has to 
suffer in that way. 

876
00:43:12,120 --> 00:43:13,680
Baby. 
Because even when I go with. 

877
00:43:14,040 --> 00:43:15,920
Your migraines. 
This is the thing, even when I 

878
00:43:15,920 --> 00:43:19,920
get slight period pain and I 
know it's it's not even to a 

879
00:43:19,920 --> 00:43:24,280
certain level of what it even 
touches the sides of what Freya 

880
00:43:24,280 --> 00:43:26,800
experiences. 
It makes me feel horrific. 

881
00:43:27,120 --> 00:43:31,040
And as bad as it is, I'd 
probably take a migraine over 

882
00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:32,120
severe period pain. 
But. 

883
00:43:32,240 --> 00:43:35,000
You get used to it, yeah. 
Whereas you're saying when you 

884
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:38,240
get migraines, you say to me, 
how the fuck do you suffer like 

885
00:43:38,240 --> 00:43:41,200
this every single day? 
And it is strange. 

886
00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:43,800
It must be like a. 
Well I've got like a weird like 

887
00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:45,920
neck issue as well. 
It's going on the almond, 

888
00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:46,560
please. 
Pray it. 

889
00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:50,160
No, no, I can't. 
Do you know that? 

890
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:55,360
Me and Liv, because Liv spends a
lot of time with us because of 

891
00:43:55,360 --> 00:43:57,240
all the stuff that we have going
on with the pod. 

892
00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:03,840
Liv now has an elements list for
Freya where every day she writes

893
00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:08,200
down Big Don's elements. 
And I'm actually you should. 

894
00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:10,160
You should. 
Can you write in if you want me 

895
00:44:10,160 --> 00:44:13,400
to post it on the story? 
Because God, when I tell you it 

896
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:19,480
is hilarious. 
It's hilarious and honestly 

897
00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:21,160
grippy Socks for her. 
Yeah, I know. 

898
00:44:21,840 --> 00:44:24,800
Truly. 
Well, maybe it's just hard being

899
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:26,080
me. 
I've always got something wrong 

900
00:44:26,080 --> 00:44:28,200
with me. 
OK, shut the fuck up. 

901
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:31,800
Anyway, this is the horror, not 
Horror Story. 

902
00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:35,920
But this is really interesting 
because, like, yeah, I'm going 

903
00:44:35,920 --> 00:44:40,800
to let you know why, OK. 
Hey girls, the itchy jaw that's 

904
00:44:40,800 --> 00:44:43,240
going on the elements list. 
Oh, it's not the itchy air, it's

905
00:44:43,240 --> 00:44:45,680
the itchy jaw. 
Because usually it's the itchy 

906
00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:48,080
air, yeah. 
I have the most random situation

907
00:44:48,080 --> 00:44:49,920
of my whole life. 
I've always been a straight 

908
00:44:49,920 --> 00:44:51,400
woman. 
Interesting. 

909
00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:54,720
I've never been with a woman, 
nor have I ever romantically 

910
00:44:54,720 --> 00:44:58,360
wanted to be with one. 
But big on the butt here girls. 

911
00:44:58,880 --> 00:45:02,240
Recently I met a girl from gym 
she's straight to and she was 

912
00:45:02,240 --> 00:45:05,240
always saying from the start I 
would marry that girl and she's 

913
00:45:05,240 --> 00:45:08,680
always been very flirty. 
I was always prude haha and 

914
00:45:08,680 --> 00:45:11,120
laughed a lot of it off. 
But as time has gone on we've 

915
00:45:11,120 --> 00:45:13,880
become closer. 
We'd be super flirty and jokly 

916
00:45:13,880 --> 00:45:16,720
sent nudes on occasions. 
What? 

917
00:45:17,960 --> 00:45:21,440
We have cuddled up a few times 
nothing else. 

918
00:45:21,520 --> 00:45:23,840
I think we are super fetching it
when we are drinking. 

919
00:45:23,840 --> 00:45:25,280
Question mark I don't know are 
you? 

920
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:29,640
The girl is proper flirty and 
has admittedly been open that 

921
00:45:29,640 --> 00:45:31,920
she fancies me. 
We have both said that we are 

922
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:33,880
not looking for a lesbian 
relationship. 

923
00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:36,320
I mean, well, it's going to be a
relationship that's. 

924
00:45:36,680 --> 00:45:38,080
A. 
That's a lesbian relationship. 

925
00:45:38,840 --> 00:45:41,720
I don't know if this is toxic 
but why does it have to be a 

926
00:45:41,720 --> 00:45:43,320
relationship? 
I feel at this point I'm just 

927
00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:46,240
curious. 
I'm sorry, this one screams of 

928
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:48,040
like internal. 
To the back. 

929
00:45:48,040 --> 00:45:52,320
Girl, like no hate, but you need
to do some self work here and 

930
00:45:52,320 --> 00:45:55,280
read up on like the emotions 
that you're going through 

931
00:45:55,280 --> 00:45:57,680
because I love what you're 
saying here. 

932
00:45:58,040 --> 00:46:04,320
You know, you're not being 
outwardly like problematic, but 

933
00:46:04,360 --> 00:46:06,960
you are being internally 
problematic the the things that 

934
00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:08,680
you've said. 
Absolutely, She then says. 

935
00:46:09,000 --> 00:46:11,680
She has said she would rather 
have me in her life for the rest

936
00:46:11,680 --> 00:46:14,960
of her life than to ruin it but 
still at times has said that she

937
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:19,040
does want me and will suppress 
things but I don't know what we 

938
00:46:19,040 --> 00:46:21,200
are doing and no one will ever 
make a move. 

939
00:46:21,360 --> 00:46:23,880
PS She has now started seeing a 
boy again. 

940
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:26,120
We both go to the same gym. 
It's a little community and 

941
00:46:26,120 --> 00:46:28,040
small. 
I don't know why but I don't 

942
00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:30,640
want to see her flirting. 
Please give me advice, is this 

943
00:46:30,640 --> 00:46:32,360
odd? 
OK, let me break this down for 

944
00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:35,440
you guys. 
Can I just say problem #1 

945
00:46:35,560 --> 00:46:38,840
actually not problem number one.
I'm a lesbian, right? 

946
00:46:38,880 --> 00:46:43,160
I know I'm a lesbian. 
I don't ever see that changing, 

947
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:47,000
but I'm not saying it could. 
I understand that sexuality can 

948
00:46:47,000 --> 00:46:52,800
be a journey and you know, it's,
it's a spectrum. 

949
00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:56,680
But very much right now, and 
since I've come out, I have been

950
00:46:56,680 --> 00:47:04,240
very much on the lesbian side. 
If I were to start having 

951
00:47:04,360 --> 00:47:10,440
romantic and sexual feelings for
a man, I would no longer be 

952
00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:16,480
identifying as a lesbian. 
OK, strictly, I would say that I

953
00:47:16,480 --> 00:47:21,200
was then predominantly maybe 
pansexual or bisexual if we were

954
00:47:21,200 --> 00:47:23,480
going to need to label it. 
I know a lot of people don't 

955
00:47:23,480 --> 00:47:24,880
like labels. 
I do. 

956
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:27,000
I like my label. 
I like wearing my label. 

957
00:47:28,480 --> 00:47:31,760
The fact she's opened this by 
saying I'm straight is 

958
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:34,160
problematic. 
I mean, it's screaming of me. 

959
00:47:34,360 --> 00:47:35,760
Because you could say I'm 
questioning. 

960
00:47:35,760 --> 00:47:38,240
Yeah, right. 
But she can't even say that. 

961
00:47:38,640 --> 00:47:41,160
And this might she may not even 
realise that this is like a 

962
00:47:41,160 --> 00:47:43,000
thing. 
But then she also said I've 

963
00:47:43,000 --> 00:47:45,720
never been with a woman, nor 
have I ever romantically wanted 

964
00:47:45,720 --> 00:47:47,240
to be. 
But you have now. 

965
00:47:47,840 --> 00:47:50,880
So it's really interesting, but 
let me just break it down for 

966
00:47:50,880 --> 00:47:54,040
you guys. 
She has met a girl from the gym.

967
00:47:54,040 --> 00:47:55,880
This is a classic, like it 
really is. 

968
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:58,080
Gym is like a breeding ground 
for lesbians. 

969
00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:02,800
They're very flirty. 
They send nudes to each other, 

970
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:05,080
but they put it on the premise 
of saying that it's jokey. 

971
00:48:06,800 --> 00:48:08,840
I mean, to be fair, actually, I 
was about to say I've never done

972
00:48:08,840 --> 00:48:09,520
that. 
I've done that. 

973
00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:12,360
I do it to Liana, like, OK, like
a random you, but it's so 

974
00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:13,840
different. 
We're like Bros. 

975
00:48:13,840 --> 00:48:15,880
Like these are two girls that 
have met together. 

976
00:48:15,880 --> 00:48:19,840
And we sent pics to our friends 
all of the time in a piss taking

977
00:48:19,840 --> 00:48:21,360
way. 
It's very different and I know 

978
00:48:21,360 --> 00:48:24,400
that the jokey way is not jokey.
No, I used to do this with my 

979
00:48:24,400 --> 00:48:28,440
first lesbian crush. 
Believe me to send this to you. 

980
00:48:28,520 --> 00:48:29,720
Yeah. 
Oh, no, no, no, no. 

981
00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:31,760
Or it would be like 
inconspicuous. 

982
00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:34,080
So you try and make out like it 
wasn't a nude, so you'd be. 

983
00:48:34,080 --> 00:48:36,040
What was it like, you know? 
When you're like, oh, I'm in the

984
00:48:36,040 --> 00:48:39,920
bath and it would be like a 
slight side titty pic where it's

985
00:48:39,920 --> 00:48:44,040
like it could be oh, I'm in the 
bath, but deep down you want it 

986
00:48:44,040 --> 00:48:46,680
to be I'm in the bath. 
And I know that she's sending 

987
00:48:46,680 --> 00:48:50,920
stuff like, oh, look at this new
underwear I got for going out on

988
00:48:50,960 --> 00:48:54,640
a date with a guy and like 
there's under boob or like the 

989
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:57,760
pussies in full. 
Like you don't send that to your

990
00:48:57,760 --> 00:48:59,800
mate. 
Because actually, if you want to

991
00:48:59,800 --> 00:49:04,760
send underwear shots to your 
friends about new underwear 

992
00:49:04,760 --> 00:49:07,160
you've bought, just fucking take
a photo of it. 

993
00:49:07,160 --> 00:49:09,240
Throw it on your bed. 
Yeah, Do you know what I mean? 

994
00:49:09,280 --> 00:49:12,200
Like you're going out of your 
way to put it on and pose in a 

995
00:49:12,200 --> 00:49:14,160
certain way. 
We see you girls? 

996
00:49:14,240 --> 00:49:18,400
Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. 
They cuddle as well which I 

997
00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:20,000
think is. 
Just and again, that depends on 

998
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:21,960
the type of cuddle, right? 
It does if it's. 

999
00:49:22,120 --> 00:49:24,320
I know they're cuddling in a 
very certain way. 

1000
00:49:24,320 --> 00:49:26,560
Yeah, and you know, there's some
stroking going on, like stroking

1001
00:49:26,560 --> 00:49:28,480
of the arm stroking. 
And there's like I can. 

1002
00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:30,760
Feel the tension in their chest.
I know. 

1003
00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:33,720
And the heavy breathing, like 
I'm thinking about it now, how I

1004
00:49:33,720 --> 00:49:38,160
used to feel laying next to. 
When I but she says, but she 

1005
00:49:38,160 --> 00:49:41,800
says that she kind of wants to 
have her in her life. 

1006
00:49:42,120 --> 00:49:44,600
She does want her, but she 
suppresses her that either girl 

1007
00:49:44,600 --> 00:49:46,400
has said that, that she 
suppresses her feelings. 

1008
00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:49,280
So I think what's happening is 
that you're both suppressing 

1009
00:49:49,280 --> 00:49:51,280
your feelings. 
Unfortunately, you're both very 

1010
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:53,720
much in the same boat. 
It's a real problem, but. 

1011
00:49:54,080 --> 00:49:56,920
Girls, this is a this is a 
classic. 

1012
00:49:57,120 --> 00:49:59,720
This is a classic. 
Literally we fell in love with a

1013
00:49:59,720 --> 00:50:03,640
straight woman episode, right 
We've and any lesbian listening 

1014
00:50:03,640 --> 00:50:06,480
to this now who's been through 
it, girls like back us up here. 

1015
00:50:06,760 --> 00:50:09,560
It's the classic when you fall 
in love with your quote unquote 

1016
00:50:09,560 --> 00:50:13,320
straight best friend, which is 
the whole like we're soulmates 

1017
00:50:13,320 --> 00:50:17,360
and I'd rather choose us being 
platonic soulmates that over 

1018
00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:19,960
exploring this sexually. 
And you kind of convince 

1019
00:50:19,960 --> 00:50:23,240
yourself that, you know, the 
love that you feel is not 

1020
00:50:23,240 --> 00:50:26,360
lesbian love. 
It is what's it called? 

1021
00:50:26,360 --> 00:50:28,640
Twin flame? 
Like the one person, the 

1022
00:50:28,640 --> 00:50:30,080
platonic twin flame. 
Yeah. 

1023
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:33,080
No, no, no, no, no. 
Deep down, let's be honest, you 

1024
00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:34,440
want to fuck? 
But also, yeah, you do. 

1025
00:50:34,440 --> 00:50:38,200
But also why babe? 
Why are you scared about this 

1026
00:50:38,200 --> 00:50:39,920
being a relationship? 
Because you said but why does it

1027
00:50:39,920 --> 00:50:41,440
have to be a relationship? 
Why? 

1028
00:50:41,520 --> 00:50:44,080
What truly like I? 
Actually, The thing is, she's 

1029
00:50:44,080 --> 00:50:45,920
not scared about it being a 
relationship. 

1030
00:50:45,920 --> 00:50:49,640
What she's scared is that they 
start having sex, right? 

1031
00:50:49,920 --> 00:50:52,480
And they start exploring the 
sexual tension there. 

1032
00:50:52,680 --> 00:50:53,480
She says. 
I think she. 

1033
00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:56,800
Then has to admit to herself 
that what she puts in the top of

1034
00:50:56,800 --> 00:50:59,200
that conversation, which is 
straight, is it in capital 

1035
00:50:59,200 --> 00:51:00,760
letters. 
No, no, no. 

1036
00:51:00,760 --> 00:51:01,360
Oh. 
OK. 

1037
00:51:01,360 --> 00:51:02,640
I thought she put it in capital 
letters. 

1038
00:51:02,680 --> 00:51:06,720
The emphasis on straight is no 
longer potentially A narrative 

1039
00:51:06,720 --> 00:51:08,440
that she can. 
Explore the only thing that I 

1040
00:51:08,440 --> 00:51:11,160
would say is that this the other
girl, even though you said that 

1041
00:51:11,160 --> 00:51:13,840
she's just started seeing a boy,
you know, I do believe that 

1042
00:51:13,840 --> 00:51:16,680
she's probably doing that 
overcompensation, overcompensate

1043
00:51:16,680 --> 00:51:18,760
and also probably make you 
jealous in the gym because you 

1044
00:51:18,760 --> 00:51:21,160
said here that she says that she
admittedly open. 

1045
00:51:21,240 --> 00:51:23,840
She admittedly has been open and
said that she fancies you. 

1046
00:51:24,240 --> 00:51:27,440
So I think that she's made the 
first move there and I don't 

1047
00:51:27,440 --> 00:51:31,280
know what your response was, but
you said, we have both said that

1048
00:51:31,280 --> 00:51:33,240
we're not looking for a lesbian 
relationship, darling. 

1049
00:51:33,240 --> 00:51:36,400
But she just said that she you 
cuddle, you send nudes, you want

1050
00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:38,720
each other in your lives. 
Like honestly. 

1051
00:51:38,720 --> 00:51:40,600
You have to have a lesbian 
relationship like. 

1052
00:51:41,080 --> 00:51:42,880
You know what? 
It sounds like they both fancy 

1053
00:51:42,880 --> 00:51:44,560
each other. 
Maybe they do want to do that, 

1054
00:51:44,560 --> 00:51:47,120
but I do think them having to 
jump straight to that is too 

1055
00:51:47,120 --> 00:51:48,560
much. 
Just have a bit of fun and 

1056
00:51:48,560 --> 00:51:51,160
explore and have an open 
conversation about the fact that

1057
00:51:51,160 --> 00:51:53,760
you're clearly both adults. 
You have these, you know, sexual

1058
00:51:53,760 --> 00:51:56,800
feelings for each other. 
Yeah, You can explore that and 

1059
00:51:56,800 --> 00:51:59,960
remain friends as long as you're
both sensible adults having 

1060
00:51:59,960 --> 00:52:01,520
sensible. 
Conversations feels like a very 

1061
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:04,280
safe conversation for you to 
have because it's already said 

1062
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:07,200
that she fancies you, right? 
So I think you can just say, 

1063
00:52:07,200 --> 00:52:11,120
look, I I've always believed 
that I was straight, but I have 

1064
00:52:11,120 --> 00:52:12,120
the. 
This is new territory. 

1065
00:52:12,120 --> 00:52:15,960
This is new territory for me. 
You're really interesting to me.

1066
00:52:16,000 --> 00:52:19,760
I really, I, I find you really 
attractive and I'd love to be 

1067
00:52:19,760 --> 00:52:21,320
able to like explore that with 
you. 

1068
00:52:21,680 --> 00:52:23,120
I'm not putting a label on 
anything. 

1069
00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:24,640
I'm not saying that we should go
dating. 

1070
00:52:24,640 --> 00:52:28,160
But what I'm saying is is that I
kind of, it would be nice to see

1071
00:52:28,160 --> 00:52:30,280
what would happen here if we 
were a bit more open minded 

1072
00:52:30,280 --> 00:52:31,760
about it. 
Absolutely. 

1073
00:52:31,760 --> 00:52:35,320
And you know what, like I've, 
you know, I've tried to suppress

1074
00:52:35,320 --> 00:52:37,120
my feelings as well. 
You told me that you were 

1075
00:52:37,120 --> 00:52:40,680
suppressing yours, but I've seen
you flirting with this guy in 

1076
00:52:40,680 --> 00:52:43,520
the gym and it kind of breaks my
heart a bit because we. 

1077
00:52:43,560 --> 00:52:44,840
Don't have to say it breaks not 
heart. 

1078
00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:47,480
You can just say you know. 
In the light hearted, yeah, it's

1079
00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:50,200
like. 
It's emphasised to me that this 

1080
00:52:50,200 --> 00:52:52,360
is something that I want to 
explore because seeing you as 

1081
00:52:52,360 --> 00:52:54,920
someone else is actually, you 
know, heightened. 

1082
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:57,640
How And then maybe say, how 
would you feel? 

1083
00:52:57,880 --> 00:53:00,280
Like maybe say, how would you 
feel if I was flying with a guy 

1084
00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:02,320
in front of you? 
Well, this is the thing again, 

1085
00:53:02,320 --> 00:53:05,280
going back to my situation of 
when I was like, obsessed with 

1086
00:53:05,280 --> 00:53:09,480
my best friend for four years, 
we'd both do exactly the same 

1087
00:53:09,480 --> 00:53:11,760
thing. 
We'd kind of spill too far into 

1088
00:53:11,760 --> 00:53:15,640
the emotional lesbian side of 
the friendship. 

1089
00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:20,640
Then we'd go out on a night out 
and use guys to make each other 

1090
00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:23,280
jealous. 
God it's so bad I actually 

1091
00:53:23,520 --> 00:53:25,800
wanted to die. 
I would too. 

1092
00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:33,080
Because I'd see her kissing men 
and I'd be like, I would drag my

1093
00:53:33,080 --> 00:53:39,680
nipples across burning coal to 
be that stinky sweaty. 

1094
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:45,280
Hairy ridden. 
Man yeah. 

1095
00:53:45,280 --> 00:53:48,720
Oh my God, the pain, girls. 
Why is that pain so bad? 

1096
00:53:48,720 --> 00:53:50,280
Oh, it's so bad. 
It actually makes sure. 

1097
00:53:50,280 --> 00:53:53,720
Like it makes your vagina go up 
into your heart, like, you know 

1098
00:53:53,720 --> 00:53:55,200
what I mean? 
Like, you know that feeling? 

1099
00:53:55,560 --> 00:53:56,400
It's awful. 
So. 

1100
00:53:56,640 --> 00:53:58,240
But this is classic. 
This is the thing. 

1101
00:53:58,240 --> 00:53:59,880
You said I don't know, this is 
toxic. 

1102
00:53:59,880 --> 00:54:01,560
It is toxic. 
I think it is. 

1103
00:54:01,800 --> 00:54:03,040
I think it is. 
I think. 

1104
00:54:03,040 --> 00:54:05,200
It can be a bit fun, depends how
long it goes on for, no? 

1105
00:54:05,200 --> 00:54:07,280
But what I'm saying is she's 
like, do you think that this is 

1106
00:54:07,280 --> 00:54:09,360
toxic? 
I think right now. 

1107
00:54:09,560 --> 00:54:11,360
If your feelings towards 
yourself are toxic. 

1108
00:54:11,360 --> 00:54:13,320
Yes, that's what I mean. 
I think the way that you're 

1109
00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:15,680
treating this situation to 
yourself, it's toxic. 

1110
00:54:15,680 --> 00:54:17,160
It's toxic. 
You need to be kinder to 

1111
00:54:17,160 --> 00:54:19,960
yourself. 
You need to be more open with 

1112
00:54:19,960 --> 00:54:21,640
yourself before you're open with
her. 

1113
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:25,880
Yeah, because you need to accept
that you fancy her a bit. 

1114
00:54:26,200 --> 00:54:27,760
This has never happened to you 
before. 

1115
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,720
It could be completely nothing, 
but also you could have. 

1116
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:33,360
You could explore something 
incredible and grow from your. 

1117
00:54:33,360 --> 00:54:34,920
Experience. 
What's that called? 

1118
00:54:35,440 --> 00:54:37,160
By curious? 
By curious, Yeah. 

1119
00:54:38,040 --> 00:54:41,040
So no one, you know, you could 
explore this with this girl, 

1120
00:54:41,120 --> 00:54:44,560
have incredible sex for six 
weeks, decide that that's not 

1121
00:54:44,560 --> 00:54:47,160
for you and end up with a man 
and be with him for the rest of 

1122
00:54:47,160 --> 00:54:48,760
your life. 
No one is saying that you can't 

1123
00:54:48,760 --> 00:54:49,960
do that. 
No one is saying that you 

1124
00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:51,440
shouldn't do that. 
No one is saying that you're 

1125
00:54:51,440 --> 00:54:53,880
wrong for doing that. 
You could explore this with her.

1126
00:54:54,080 --> 00:54:56,200
I genuinely don't think you've 
got anything to lose. 

1127
00:54:56,200 --> 00:54:58,800
Also, because you've already got
these feelings, so is she 

1128
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:01,480
clearly then you know when she's
like, Oh well, I don't want it 

1129
00:55:01,480 --> 00:55:04,280
to you're. 
Experiencing this with her, you 

1130
00:55:04,280 --> 00:55:05,760
will. 
If you don't explore this with 

1131
00:55:05,760 --> 00:55:07,720
this person, it will happen 
again in your life. 

1132
00:55:07,720 --> 00:55:12,120
Because if you're open to that, 
clearly more than what you 

1133
00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:14,920
realise, you will attract that 
again. 

1134
00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:16,880
And send her this podcast. 
Yeah. 

1135
00:55:16,880 --> 00:55:19,840
And again, I'm not saying for a 
second that you aren't, you 

1136
00:55:19,840 --> 00:55:22,280
know, all of the things that you
thought you were throughout your

1137
00:55:22,280 --> 00:55:24,040
life. 
That's not saying that those 

1138
00:55:24,040 --> 00:55:26,960
things are a lie. 
You've just evolved and a 

1139
00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:30,760
situation has presented itself 
to you and go for it. 

1140
00:55:30,840 --> 00:55:32,120
I mean. 
That's for you, babe. 

1141
00:55:32,120 --> 00:55:34,280
Also, can I just say a lesbian 
relationship? 

1142
00:55:34,520 --> 00:55:38,120
It's fucking incredible, babe. 
So you know what, if you end up 

1143
00:55:38,120 --> 00:55:39,800
falling down that rabbit hole, 
so be it. 

1144
00:55:39,800 --> 00:55:41,000
Like it's. 
Not the worst. 

1145
00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:42,320
It's not the worst. 
It ain't. 

1146
00:55:42,400 --> 00:55:44,160
It's that I would argue it's the
best thing that will ever 

1147
00:55:44,160 --> 00:55:45,160
fucking happen to you in your 
life. 

1148
00:55:45,160 --> 00:55:47,840
It's the best thing that's ever 
happened to me in my life, so. 

1149
00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:50,040
It's the best thing that 
continues to happen to me, 

1150
00:55:50,040 --> 00:55:53,040
except for when you drop your 
phone in SO. 

1151
00:55:53,120 --> 00:55:55,720
Annoying. 
No, I mean, we're here for you. 

1152
00:55:55,760 --> 00:55:57,720
I want to hear. 
I want to hear the update of 

1153
00:55:57,720 --> 00:55:58,600
this. 
Yeah, I do. 

1154
00:55:58,600 --> 00:55:59,760
I really want to hear the 
update. 

1155
00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:02,400
I want to know I might start 
going to your gym, can you tell 

1156
00:56:02,400 --> 00:56:04,240
me where it is? 
I've got a feeling she's 

1157
00:56:04,240 --> 00:56:07,120
American. 
I I don't know where she's. 

1158
00:56:07,120 --> 00:56:10,480
Going let me read. 
I think the English because if 

1159
00:56:10,480 --> 00:56:12,040
she. 
Isn't American and she's in 

1160
00:56:12,040 --> 00:56:13,080
England. 
I think. 

1161
00:56:13,560 --> 00:56:16,800
I think English is her second 
language because she said saying

1162
00:56:16,800 --> 00:56:19,200
a boy not seeing a boy. 
Said that I would say something 

1163
00:56:19,200 --> 00:56:21,000
like that because I actually 
type and can't be bothered to 

1164
00:56:21,000 --> 00:56:23,720
correct myself. 
But the advice from from us is 

1165
00:56:23,720 --> 00:56:26,200
like really what you have to 
lose? 

1166
00:56:26,200 --> 00:56:28,880
OK, the opinions of maybe some 
of your friends that like are 

1167
00:56:28,880 --> 00:56:30,600
going to judge you if they're 
doing that, they're not your 

1168
00:56:30,600 --> 00:56:32,840
fucking friends. 
Maybe you're going to yeah, 

1169
00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:34,920
maybe you're going to lose some 
male attention. 

1170
00:56:34,920 --> 00:56:36,920
Who fucking cares? 
The girlies do it better. 

1171
00:56:37,480 --> 00:56:41,520
Like, OK, your family, you 
haven't mentioned anything. 

1172
00:56:41,640 --> 00:56:43,800
But you don't even have to go 
that far. 

1173
00:56:43,800 --> 00:56:46,600
You don't need to go that far. 
You can just, like, start 

1174
00:56:46,600 --> 00:56:50,080
accepting those feelings for 
yourself, bring up that 

1175
00:56:50,080 --> 00:56:54,200
conversation in a really nice 
and open way, and then just see 

1176
00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:56,200
what happens. 
But we're here for you Every. 

1177
00:56:56,200 --> 00:56:58,480
Yeah. 
This community is amazing. 

1178
00:56:58,960 --> 00:57:01,280
You'll find support, you'll find
people. 

1179
00:57:01,280 --> 00:57:05,200
And like, believe me, you are 
nowhere near alone. 

1180
00:57:05,360 --> 00:57:09,320
Because I reckon 90% of the 
people who are listening to this

1181
00:57:09,320 --> 00:57:12,280
right now would have gone 
through exactly the same as you.

1182
00:57:12,400 --> 00:57:15,280
And the 10% who haven't gone 
through it in that way have gone

1183
00:57:15,280 --> 00:57:16,560
through it in a very similar 
way. 

1184
00:57:17,000 --> 00:57:19,560
Exactly. 
And for our straight listeners 

1185
00:57:19,560 --> 00:57:21,600
as well, we do. 
We do love you too. 

1186
00:57:21,600 --> 00:57:22,480
Oh, we do. 
Love you. 

1187
00:57:22,480 --> 00:57:23,360
No, no, no. 
Yeah. 

1188
00:57:23,520 --> 00:57:25,400
I'm not saying that, no, no. 
I'm saying for the other 

1189
00:57:25,400 --> 00:57:29,760
percentage, Australia. 
The 0.0 guys, I do want to say 

1190
00:57:29,760 --> 00:57:30,560
one thing. 
What? 

1191
00:57:31,640 --> 00:57:35,800
Which I'm so happy we've got to 
this level. 90% of our audience 

1192
00:57:35,800 --> 00:57:38,640
from the lesbian supper club 
identify as female. 

1193
00:57:38,640 --> 00:57:42,680
Amazing. 
OK, trans, trans folk, non 

1194
00:57:42,680 --> 00:57:45,040
binary folk. 
It's got nothing to do with you.

1195
00:57:45,040 --> 00:57:48,600
I fucking love you. 
You're like welcome as much and 

1196
00:57:48,600 --> 00:57:50,960
if not more than anyone else. 
Yeah, yeah. 

1197
00:57:50,960 --> 00:57:54,160
But the men, the straight men to
vanish. 

1198
00:57:54,840 --> 00:57:59,520
The fact that there's like only 
10% of them I that feeds me. 

1199
00:57:59,520 --> 00:58:02,600
Yeah, I mean, like, don't get me
wrong, I really like the fact 

1200
00:58:02,600 --> 00:58:03,960
that men listen to this pod, 
right? 

1201
00:58:04,040 --> 00:58:05,880
Because I think it's more like 
education. 

1202
00:58:05,880 --> 00:58:08,040
And I don't mean to sound 
patronising when I say that, but

1203
00:58:08,040 --> 00:58:09,760
I mean exposure. 
How can you? 

1204
00:58:09,760 --> 00:58:14,600
Possibly understand a society in
which is so different you do 

1205
00:58:14,600 --> 00:58:15,360
need. 
Educated. 

1206
00:58:15,360 --> 00:58:16,760
Yeah. 
Yeah, for sure, yeah. 

1207
00:58:16,760 --> 00:58:18,880
But it's like I. 
Don't want to be educated on the

1208
00:58:18,920 --> 00:58:21,080
strike straight white man's 
society because there's no, 

1209
00:58:21,160 --> 00:58:23,600
there's nothing benefiting me by
understanding that. 

1210
00:58:23,640 --> 00:58:26,160
Books and tits and beer. 
I mean, we love all those 

1211
00:58:26,160 --> 00:58:31,400
things, true. 
There is a straight man deep 

1212
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:34,520
down in the. 
Summer screaming to get out. 

1213
00:58:35,320 --> 00:58:38,280
He's called Hey. 
Yeah, we love you all, like all 

1214
00:58:38,280 --> 00:58:39,920
of you that listen and support. 
You're all incredible. 

1215
00:58:39,920 --> 00:58:42,800
And I think our straight 
listeners are just as valuable 

1216
00:58:42,800 --> 00:58:45,680
to us as our queer listeners 
because, like, you're going off 

1217
00:58:45,920 --> 00:58:49,240
undoubtedly, and then taking 
some of these topics and having 

1218
00:58:49,240 --> 00:58:51,880
really important conversations. 
With your peers, Yeah, exactly. 

1219
00:58:51,880 --> 00:58:54,960
Like I love that. 
But before we go as well, we're 

1220
00:58:54,960 --> 00:58:59,760
going to be doing a small, very 
low key event in the very near 

1221
00:58:59,760 --> 00:59:00,680
future. 
Yeah. 

1222
00:59:00,680 --> 00:59:03,000
So when we know the details. 
Of eight weeks, probably we're. 

1223
00:59:03,000 --> 00:59:05,560
Sending it out to you guys. 
Gonna be a ticketed event. 

1224
00:59:05,560 --> 00:59:11,160
There's probably gonna be only 
about 50 tickets, but before we 

1225
00:59:11,160 --> 00:59:14,760
get our little asses organising,
can you let us know if you'll 

1226
00:59:14,800 --> 00:59:17,840
actually want to come? 
It would be like a supper club 

1227
00:59:17,840 --> 00:59:20,000
type event. 
We're going to get a hot DJ. 

1228
00:59:20,120 --> 00:59:24,520
Yeah, hot DJ, we already know 
some drinks, I know some drinks,

1229
00:59:24,640 --> 00:59:26,920
some aperitivo. 
So. 

1230
00:59:27,000 --> 00:59:32,640
A really cool venue so if you're
interested and want to do like a

1231
00:59:32,640 --> 00:59:35,920
supper club event with us. 
Yeah, let us know. 

1232
00:59:36,000 --> 00:59:36,960
Go. 
Let's do this. 

1233
00:59:37,080 --> 00:59:40,480
And there's also another really 
exciting thing that we've got 

1234
00:59:40,480 --> 00:59:41,720
coming up as well, which we 
can't tell. 

1235
00:59:41,720 --> 00:59:43,280
You, which you'll know very 
soon. 

1236
00:59:43,280 --> 00:59:45,960
But I'm screaming inside. 
Gaze. 

1237
00:59:45,960 --> 00:59:48,080
This is the epitome of the queer
dream. 

1238
00:59:48,240 --> 00:59:49,640
Yeah, let's put it that way. 
What? 

1239
00:59:51,040 --> 00:59:56,960
Dream. 
Pussy pussy pussy. 

1240
00:59:58,520 --> 01:00:03,760
No I just want to finish one 
thing has anyone else seen on 

1241
01:00:03,760 --> 01:00:06,480
TikTok? 
Oh my God, that woman. 

1242
01:00:06,640 --> 01:00:12,560
Who duet the Billie Eilish song?
The new one Go enjoyment. 

1243
01:00:14,040 --> 01:00:22,280
I'm sad again. 
Don't tell my boyfriend if you 

1244
01:00:22,280 --> 01:00:23,760
don't know what we're going on 
about. 

1245
01:00:24,040 --> 01:00:26,720
Find out. 
Love you gays. 

1246
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:28,400
I'm straight. 
Love you all love. 

1247
01:00:28,640 --> 01:00:31,000
You love you. 
I will speak to you next week.