Welcome to the nourishing. Amy podcast.
I'm Amy Rankin. I am an emotional intelligence
and life coach as Speaker, a Creator, and a wellness.
Chaser, I have created this podcast for you to learn how
'but mindset changes and get really actionable.
Takeaways to find out who you are, what lights you up, how you
can love yourself again and how to live your best life.
Give yourself the space to welcome in more self-care and
confidence. Reduce feelings like overwhelm
and stress and let find your sparkle again.
Are you ready? Let's do it.
Hello everybody and welcome back to episode 59 of the nourishing.
Amy podcast again, thank you so much for being here with me.
And if you're listening to this on the day, that this episode
has been recorded. Happy Monday, welcome to a new
week. What a beautiful opportunity for
you to be able to sit and reflect on how your last week
was and what you would really like to be bringing into the
following week, you know what, even if you're not listening to
this on a Monday, just have a little moment.
To consider how the last few days have been have a little
reflection and think about what's been going.
Well what have I really enjoyed? What's maybe not been going so
well or what did I not necessarily like about the last
few days or the last week? And also what would I like to be
changing? Is there something in your
routine that you notice is started to slip in a little bit?
Maybe there's some different thinking, patterns, or habits
that you're noticing. That are starting to come in a
few different feelings that you've maybe been pushing away.
So, Really beautiful Reflection Point.
I love Monday mornings. I know that some people don't
like Mondays go and listen to my podcast episode.
I'll find the number for you later.
Why Monday doesn't suck? If you're kind of like it's
Monday back to work, go and listen to Why Monday doesn't
suck. It's a really good episode and a
beautiful way to be able to change your thinking around
Monday's now. I'm super excited because I've
got some recommendations for you and I've actually remembered to
write them down and I am with you guys today.
I know, like I said, last episode, I was so excited about
recommendations, like a year ago and then just totally dropped
the ball and forgot about them. So, I've got some TV shows that
I'm recommending for you guys, because if you're living in
Australia, you're probably starting to notice that it's
getting really cold, and it's just the perfect weather to be
chilling out at home, and snuggling up under the blanket.
So, I have kind of broken these up into some different genres.
Because I know that there's some people People really like those
kind of nothing. Fun TV shows.
Other people like reality shows. Other people hate that kind of
stuff, and they really are into documentaries.
So, I've got the three covered for you, and I've got two
suggestions for each. So, my recommendations for TV
shows that are just like the chill out, like just really
switch off on a Friday night relaxing.
Fun TV shows is the Bold type, which is on Stan and I
absolutely Of it, all of my friends.
Hear me talk about it all the time.
I'm so obsessed. I'm totally up to date.
It is kind of, I would say, like, a bit of a modern-day Sex
in the City. So it follows three.
Best friends around New York. They work for a magazine and
it's like the millennial version of Sex in the City, I guess you
would say. So I love it.
That's my first recommendation. My second recommendation is
shits Creek, which I think is actually on Netflix.
And originally, I started watching this.
I watched the first Two episodes about a year ago and I couldn't
get into it but I've been listening to this bill podcast
which is I guess another recommendation for you.
If you guys are looking for a podcast to listen to this bill
is a quick podcast, a daily podcast by Mamma Mia and it's
very much pop culture based. So talking a lot about different
TV shows and celebrities and all of that kind of stuff.
So if you're into that, this bill is great.
They would raving about schitt's Creek a few weeks ago and I was
like, Maybe I should give it another go.
I mean, it's got six seasons so it has to be good.
Otherwise, people wouldn't watch six seasons of it.
I started watching it again. And look, it's pretty funny.
Once you start to really get a feel for who the characters are
and their different personality traits.
And one of my favorite things is these episodes of shits Creek
are only like, 20 minutes long. So I really enjoy those TV shows
that do just go for that 20 minute mark because it's
perfect. If I'm in the middle of coaching
clients and I've got a little Out of time.
And I do just want to like switch off or I'm having lunch
at home and I just want to take like a 20-minute break and I
don't feel like doing something like meditating or journaling,
or do you know what I mean those times when you just want to
chill out, I really find that these 20 minute episodes are so
great. Because once it's done, that's
it, I'm not like having to interrupt the drama of what I
was going on in the tea in the middle of like a 45-minute TV
episode. So they're my like fun type of
genres. I've To reality TV shows to
recommend for you. My first one is below deck.
Now, it has recently been released on Netflix.
I saw like the first two seasons.
Now I do have to admit they're quite old.
So I skipped a few seasons and I'm watching it on, hey, you
it's really funny and it's so good.
It's about it follows Crews that work on super Yachts.
So for me, I was like, oh my gosh, this resonates with me so
much because We traveled Croatia last year and, you know, we were
on that our little boat and it was amazing.
We absolutely loved it. Made such good friends with
everyone on the boat and it was so much fun, but it was no,
superyacht let me tell you and we would pull up and we would
like Doc next to these super yachts and we would have to walk
through them to get to the dock and we were just in absolute or
of these boats like I cannot even explain, they are Just
jaw-droppingly, amazing? You I just cannot ever imagine
being on one of those boats. And so this TV show I was like,
oh my gosh now we get to see inside all the boats and what
actually happens. It follows the crew and it also
follows the different Charter guests that come onto the boats
as well. So it's interesting like Aaron
and I have started watching it together and I think he kind of
likes it because it's got that aspect of like learning about
what happens on the boat and all the different ways that it
works. But then it's also funny because
you're following the different types of Charter guests that
they get on and you know very dramatic as with any normal I
guess reality TV show but my other recommendation is Bachelor
in Paradise. Now I do have to be honest, I
have never watched Bachelor in Paradise before but I was with a
few of my friends the other week and they were absolutely raving
about it and so excited for this season to start and it's
actually starting up I think like next week or the week
after. So I've been seeing all the Most
for it, I know everyone's getting really excited for it
and I thought, you know what, I might give it a go this year and
just chill out and give myself some space.
You know, before Bob gets here, I'm sure there's not going to be
a lot of time for sitting and watching reality TV shows Once
Bobby's here and there's a lot of things happening.
So they are my reality TV show recommendations for you.
Now, I do have two documentaries to recommend as well.
These are my absolute favorite documentaries.
I have probably spoke In about these actually not even
probably. I know I've spoken about these
before, but seeing as I'm getting back into doing
recommendations, these are so good that they definitely
deserve a recommendation. And I know there's a few of you
guys that are new here as well. So you may not have heard me
speak about these before, if you haven't listened to some of my
previous episodes. So my first documentary is by
brene Brown and it's called the call to courage and it's
available on Netflix. No, Brown is just one of my
favorite people. She has some amazing books if
you're into self development books and personal well-being
books, definitely go and give her books ago, but the call to
courage is such a good documentary for really getting
down and dirty with calling yourself out on your bullshit,
calling yourself out on your excuses.
If you're noticing that, there's something that you're feeling a
little bit nervous about or you're afraid to do.
Ooh, or that, you know, you want to kind of take the leap and do
something, but you're feeling a bit scared.
This is the documentary for you to be watching.
She just has such good perspectives on things, she's so
motivating. She's so empowering and I guess
you know, like the name says she will help you to change your
perspective and feel more courageous with in your life.
So I really recommend that and also my last recommendation for
you. Is my all-time favorite, Tony
Robbins, I am not your Guru. So Tony Robbins, if you don't
know who he is is like the world's best life coach.
So he's obviously one of my Idols but he's just absolutely
fantastic. And he actually uses an LP or
neuro-linguistic programming which is one of the modalities
that I am trained and certified in that I use with my clients as
well. So I think that's probably part
of the reason why I really love this documentary because to
actually see it in action and to see one of my absolute Idols
utilizing it. It is so powerful.
So, for those of you that are currently interested in like
that mindset perspective, it's really cool.
But also, just to see what the power of coaching can bring you
as well. And to see these people that
have absolutely changed their perspectives and change their
lives in the way that they feel and really transformed, you
know, relationships that they may have felt had been broken
for years beforehand. So I am not your Guru by Tony.
Robbins is my last recommendation.
Station for you guys today. So I know that was quite a few
recommendations but I kind of didn't want to just go for like
the Bold type or just below deck without giving some context to
some others. Because I know there's a very
diverse range of people that do listen in to the podcast.
So let's jump into the topic that I want to talk with you
guys about today. It's so funny.
I actually had this written down about six months ago that I
wanted to do a topic on this because I presented a workshop
at a retreat. With a beautiful bunch of women.
And when I was talking about this idea and these concept,
it's so simple to implement. And for a lot of them, it was
like their biggest takeaway. They were like, oh my gosh, I am
going to start doing that now. And I actually had quite a few
comments in the private Facebook group that we had for that
Retreat and that group of women that they had started using it
over the coming weeks after that Retreat, and just loving it.
And Then I kind of forgot about recording that podcast episode
topic and I've been doing my own personal coaching sessions.
I've started them back up again and really ramping them up
before Bob gets here and we were kind of speaking about this as
well. And I was like, oh my gosh, why
haven't I ever recorded this podcast episode?
So I want to talk to you first of all, about the topic that we
were touching on with my coaching sessions, which is how
often do you, apologize for things.
It's so funny. When you think about how often
it is, that you say sorry without even really realizing
that you're apologizing for something.
That doesn't really need to be apologized for.
So like, oh sorry. Like if you get in the way of
someone at work or sorry I haven't sent that thing through
or sorry. I haven't done this yet.
There is so many times that we apologize.
So that was one of my biggest takeaways and realizations from
my coaching session. Is that I was doing a few weeks
ago and really catching myself out on that.
I'm being like, hang on a second.
I don't need to be sorry. And I've seen some beautiful
comments from the people that are in the group coaching
sessions with me that a noticing like, oh my gosh, like I'm
catching myself out so often saying sorry, like I'm sorry,
for being emotional. Sorry for crying like, all this
stuff. So the actual concept that I
wanted to talk with you guys about that, you can really start
to implement here is to But saying, thank you instead.
And the reason that this helps so much is because it's such a
great communication tool and it really helps to be able to
reduce potential conflict. So, say, for example, if you're
running late for a meeting, or you're running late to meet a
friend, and you've got stuck in traffic or something.
And, you know, that that person really values people being on
time, or that you just essentially feel bad, there's
such Such there's room there for you to get to that meeting, or
that lunch date, that breakfast date, that whatever that thing
is that you were doing and kind of run in and be like, oh my
gosh, I'm sorry. I'm so late and can you see how
that kind of starts the conversation off on the back
foot because yes, it's validating that you were running
late, but it's also not really helping that person with the
potential that excuse me, they could be feeling frustrated.
They might be a little bit annoyed like maybe sometimes.
Don't care, and that's great. But if there's the potential
that maybe they do, what you can do instead is say something
along the lines of thanks for your patience.
So I do that, sometimes if I have had a coaching session that
has run over time and I'll message my client and say, hey,
just letting you know, I'm running about 5 minutes late.
I'm just finishing up with this client now and they'll write
back and say yep, no worries. The first thing I will say is
soon as I get on to that next coaching session is thank you so
much. For being so flexible and being
so patient. And can you see the difference
in that? Instead of, oh my gosh, I'm so
sorry. I'm so late to thank you so much
for being so patient. It really changes the
perspective of that whole conversation and that person is
kind of like yeah, like I was being patient.
Wasn't I or like, yeah, I was being a bit flexible, but no
worries. Like, that's okay.
It's really bringing that gratitude in that appreciation
for that person's time. Time is so Valuable, I don't
know anybody that would say that they have a lot of spare time
lately. We're always kind of feeling
like we're multitasking and running around and maybe running
late for things and we've got all these different things.
Happening and different. Focus is happening.
Very regularly these days. And so to actually thank
somebody for that. Thank you for your time.
Thank you for waiting for me. Thank you for being patient.
Bye-bye. Ringing in that gratitude in
that appreciation for that person, it totally changes the
whole conversation, the whole direction that that could have
gone for you. So I've got a few different
examples for you to use. If you are not driving, feel
free to write these down. If you are driving, just make
mental note and maybe you might find there's like one or two
that really stand out for you that you're like yes this is
something that I'm going to start to implement.
This is something I notice comes up for me.
So Another example that I've got is, let's say you've had to
reschedule something. It might be again.
A meeting at work, it might be a catch up with a friend, it could
be anything. So you're rescheduling on
something instead of I'm so sorry I had to reschedule.
Let's change that to thank you for your adaptability.
Thank you for your willingness to change.
Thank you for your ability to change and fit me into your
schedule. How different does that feel
when we're changing these around?
It's so powerful. You guys just by changing our
language and changing the perspective, oh, it's just
beautiful and really helps to cultivate and create that
connection that we're wanting. Like I said, instead of starting
off on the back foot, so let's change.
Sorry, I had to reschedule to thanks for your adaptability.
Another one that I've got and super common for people that
aren't very comfortable with their feelings is, sorry.
I'm crying or sorry for crying. You know, like, I'm sure you've
done it at one point or you can think of a friend that does it.
If they get upset, they say, oh sorry, I don't know why I'm
crying you guys. We don't have to apologize for
our emotions. I mean I can put my hand up and
say I do it sometimes too. But We don't need to apologize
for our emotions if you're crying or if you feel like you
want to cry, there is a good reason for that.
And why would you suppress that? Why would you not let that out
and give yourself the beautiful opportunity to do that?
Anyway, that's a little tangent. So, instead of I'm sorry for
crying, sorry for getting emotional, sorry, for getting
worked up. Let's change that.
Thank you so much for holding space for me.
Thank you for being there for me.
How beautiful is that again? We're creating such a beautiful
connection. And what do you think about it?
If your best friend was sitting in front of you, and they
started crying about something. And then they said, oh, I'm so
sorry. Sorry, for getting my storm.
Sorry for crying. Would you not also?
Then be thinking, oh my God, why are you apologizing?
Like, let it out. Go for it.
Like, if you need to cry, please feel comfortable enough to cry
in front of me. So bring that, that love that
appreciation, that generosity to yourself and recognize that you
don't need to apologize, but crying or showing emotion and
being vulnerable is a beautiful thing.
But if you do ever feel the urge to apologize, Thank that person
for holding space for you. Thank that person for being
there for you. Some other examples.
I've got I guess this one's kind of on the same same line as that
one. I'm sorry.
I've been so needy lately. So you might notice that there
might have been some opportunity that you have had to ask for
help. There's been some stuff going on
and you've needed some things from some different people or
from the same people. And they've really been helping
you out instead of, I'm sorry for being so needy lately, let's
change that. Thank you for being there for
me. So, Again, similar to the last
one. Thank you for holding space.
Thank you for being there for me.
Thank you for helping me. Again look at it.
Like if this was your best friend and your best friend came
to you almost like hey I'm really struggling this week.
I need a hand with this. Would you mind or I really need
help with this and I don't know who else to go to, is it okay,
if I get your help What would your response be to your best
friend? So please stop beating yourself
up and feeling like you need to apologize for asking for help or
being needy. Another one really similar to
this, I'm sorry to ask you for another favor.
Know, if you're asking that person for a favor favor,
there's a good chance that they have a existing relationship
with you. Why are you apologizing?
If you would do a favor for that person, stop apologizing for
asking them to do a favor for You be grateful, except that
energy. That love that that relationship
that that person has with you and thank them.
Thank you for being there for me.
Thank you for helping me out. Another one that I've noticed
that comes up a lot in my sessions with my clients is
something might come up at the last minute and you might not be
able to make a something that someone's invited you to.
Or even if it's not last minute, you have a look at your
calendar. And you can see that someone's
invited you out to drinks or a dinner or a catch up with the
girls or, you know, family dinner, whatever it is and you
You realize that you can't make it instead of saying I'm sorry,
I can't make it. How about we change that to
thanks for inviting me? I love that you invited me.
And I would normally love to come but I have this out.
This one. You don't even really need to
give an excuse. I'm very big on not giving
excuses for Behavior, but if it is something that makes you feel
a little bit more comfortable. Thank you so much for thinking
of me. I would love to but this is
happening. So that's probably one of my
favorite ones. Actually.
I love that one. Maybe that's because it comes up
to me a little bit. I don't know.
Another one that I noticed is I'm sorry I made a mistake.
If you've done something wrong and you feel really bad, you
don't need to apologize. We all make mistakes.
So instead of, I'm sorry I made a mistake.
Hey, thanks for pointing that out.
And instead of looking at it as a mistake, if someone's pointed
something out, can you change your perspective and look at it
more as constructive. Criticism there's a good chance
that that person is not pointing that thing out to be mean or to
be rude or to be really detrimental and really put you
down. They're just trying to point
something out to you. They're just trying to show you
maybe so it doesn't happen again.
Maybe it'll help to make their lives a bit easier.
Maybe your life a bit easier. Maybe someone else's life a
little easier. If that mistake or that thing
doesn't happen again but there's nothing wrong with that.
It's just pointing something out.
So, hey, thanks for showing that to me.
Thank you for pointing that out. I'll definitely make more of an
effort to change that next time. I'll try really hard not to do
that again. And another one because I feel
like this is my last one and I feel that we're so Obliged, I
guess is the word. To be in contact with people
really regularly all the time and if we're not, we feel bad
and it's like I haven't spoken to that person in so long or
it's been like a week and I haven't message but my friend or
I didn't write back to that message, guys.
Like I said, we're all multitasking, we're all busy and
I don't want to wear that as a badge of honor.
But you know, sometimes we need to look at re setting up
boundaries and what we're saying yes to and all that kind of
stuff, but it's It's going to happen.
There's going to be times where you feel that you've been a
little distant or maybe pulled away from certain relationships
for one reason or the other instead of I'm sorry that I've
been distant. How about thank you for being
understanding with me. Hey, thanks for being so
understanding. I know there's been a lot on.
I know it's no excuse, but I really appreciate you.
All of these things are really about creating that beautiful
area of connection that opportunity for connection.
The appreciation, the gratitude, So, I really invite you guys to
start to bring in some of these changes, send me a message.
And let me know if you start to bring some of these into your
work life, your personal life, your home, life, your life with
your kids, your friends, your family, let me know how it goes,
let me know how it feels because that's what I'm really aiming
for is to really start to change the way that we feel about some
of these things. It's so cool when you can start
to really notice the change of feelings those Eautiful feelings
of appreciation and gratitude and just that warm fuzziness
that you can get. So, thank you so much.
I hope that this episode has been enlightening for you.
I hope that you've gotten something from it.
If you are interested in coaching sessions, if you've
heard anything in this episode today, that has got you a little
curious, send me a message. Get in contact with me, go and
jump over to the bu website. It's just be you coaching
dot-org. There's a coaching, info kit
that you can download over there.
You can jump onto my website. It's a me Rank and.com and check
out. There's free downloadable free
printables. What about coaching different
ways you can get in contact? You guys?
It's really not difficult, but again, thank you.
I hope you have a beautiful day. Happy Monday.
Again, if you're listening to this on the day that this
episode has been dropped and have a beautiful week.
If you liked this episode, I would love for you to screenshot
and tag me on Instagram, you guys have no idea how much that
absolutely makes my day. I get such a big smile on my
face. Thank you so much for hanging
out with me today. Day and I hope that you have got
them something from this episode.
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Thank you again so much for being with me and have a
fantastic day.