1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:03,960 Welcome to Sheeper Assisted. I'm your host Sadie Sutton, a 19 2 00:00:03,960 --> 00:00:06,440 year old from the Bay Area studying psychology at the 3 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:10,000 University of Pennsylvania. Sheeper Assisted is the teen 4 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:12,880 mental health podcast made for teenagers by a teen. 5 00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:16,120 In each episode I'll bring you authentic, accessible and 6 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:19,440 relatable conversations about every aspect of mental Wellness 7 00:00:19,960 --> 00:00:22,000 you can expect. Evidence based teen approved 8 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:26,040 resources, coping skills including lots of DBT insights 9 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:28,680 and education, and each piece of content you consume. 10 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:32,439 She Persisted offers you a safe space to feel validated and 11 00:00:32,439 --> 00:00:35,160 understood in your struggle while encouraging you to take 12 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:37,440 ownership of your journey and build your life worth living. 13 00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:41,720 So let's dive in this week on She Persisted. 14 00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:44,960 Life is impermanent and that impermanence will be on your 15 00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:47,000 side. And I think for a lot of us, 16 00:00:47,160 --> 00:00:50,000 when we feel anxious, it feels like it's not going to end. 17 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:52,680 It feels like it's all enduring, really intense, overwhelming 18 00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:55,120 experience. Also, when you're experience 19 00:00:55,120 --> 00:00:58,720 anxiety that feels like it will be a permanent fixture of your 20 00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:00,120 life. You're like, I'll always have 21 00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:03,800 this level of uncertainty and discomfort and distress, But I 22 00:01:03,800 --> 00:01:06,320 promise the things that are making you anxious now won't be 23 00:01:06,320 --> 00:01:08,360 the same things that make you anxious in 10 years. 24 00:01:08,360 --> 00:01:12,080 And arguably, you won't be as anxious or as distressed on a 25 00:01:12,080 --> 00:01:14,720 large scale. Hello, hello, and welcome back 26 00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:17,240 to She Persisted. I'm so excited you guys are here 27 00:01:17,240 --> 00:01:19,200 today. It is really been a hot minute 28 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,880 since I've done a solo episode. We've been a bit sporadic with 29 00:01:21,880 --> 00:01:25,280 our episodes this semester because I'm applying to clinical 30 00:01:25,280 --> 00:01:29,080 psychology PhD programs for Graduate School, which has taken 31 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:33,000 so much of my time. I was also at a psychology 32 00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:35,840 conference this past week, which luckily was in Philadelphia, so 33 00:01:35,840 --> 00:01:37,760 I only had to Uber like 10 minutes away. 34 00:01:38,120 --> 00:01:42,000 But that was ABCT, or the Association of Cognitive and 35 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:44,960 Behavioral Therapies. I learned a lot of things this 36 00:01:44,960 --> 00:01:48,240 weekend, some of which informed this week's episode, so I'm 37 00:01:48,240 --> 00:01:52,120 excited to dive into it. As you probably know from the 38 00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:55,280 title, we are talking about things I wish I knew about 39 00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:58,240 anxiety. I have learned a lot from my 40 00:01:58,240 --> 00:02:00,800 lived experiences with anxiety since the first time I 41 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:03,960 experienced being anxious or having a panic attack. 42 00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:07,400 So a lot of coping skills and insights and things that worked 43 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:12,120 along the way, but also a lot of psychological insights from 44 00:02:12,120 --> 00:02:15,440 taking classes at Penn, being involved in research, going to 45 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:18,320 conferences. And so I wanted to do an episode 46 00:02:18,320 --> 00:02:21,920 about how my views on anxiety have changed, Things I wish I 47 00:02:21,920 --> 00:02:24,120 would have known when I was really in the thick of it and 48 00:02:24,120 --> 00:02:27,800 struggling skills and habits that I implement today to 49 00:02:28,040 --> 00:02:31,440 maintain a healthy baseline. Or when I feel anxious, the 50 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:36,320 things I do because these things weren't intuitive or things that 51 00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:39,000 I just was equipped with when I started to feel anxious. 52 00:02:39,000 --> 00:02:40,720 So I hope this is helpful for you guys. 53 00:02:40,720 --> 00:02:43,680 If you are actively struggling with anxiety or you have someone 54 00:02:43,680 --> 00:02:46,880 in your life that's anxious or maybe at some point in the 55 00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:49,680 future you get anxious, you are not worse for the wear and 56 00:02:49,680 --> 00:02:53,080 instead have all these insights and things to implement. 57 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,320 So the first thing that I want to start with is something you 58 00:02:56,320 --> 00:02:59,160 guys hear me say all the time. If you've listened to every 59 00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:02,680 episode, you're like, we know this, but this is a quote that I 60 00:03:02,680 --> 00:03:05,840 heard in episode 28 of the podcast with Doctor Blaze 61 00:03:05,840 --> 00:03:07,320 Aguirre. He was one of the clinicians I 62 00:03:07,320 --> 00:03:10,200 worked with at 3 E McLean Hospital when I was in intensive 63 00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:12,520 treatment. And that period of time was 64 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:16,960 really, really formative with how I understood my anxiety, how 65 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:19,000 I cope with it, how I asked for help. 66 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:22,200 And I went from being like, this is this thing that really 67 00:03:22,200 --> 00:03:25,160 controls a lot of my life and caused me a lot of distress to 68 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:28,120 like, okay, I get this. I know how to have an effective 69 00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:31,040 relationship with my anxiety, what skills to use when. 70 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:33,680 And it's not this thing that is controlling me. 71 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:36,640 And we can't control anxiety. We can't will it to go away, but 72 00:03:36,640 --> 00:03:39,920 we can work with it and we can set ourselves up for success. 73 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:43,320 So the quote is life is impermanent and that 74 00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:44,840 impermanence will be on your side. 75 00:03:45,240 --> 00:03:48,640 And I think for a lot of us, when we feel anxious, first of 76 00:03:48,640 --> 00:03:50,320 all, in the moment, it feels like it's not going to end. 77 00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:53,000 It feels like it's all enduring, really intense, overwhelming 78 00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:55,560 experience. Also, when you're experiencing 79 00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:58,800 anxiety at like a medium to low level on a daily basis about 80 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:02,960 lots of things that feels like it will be a permanent fixture 81 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:04,600 of your life. You're like, I'll always have 82 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:07,600 this level of uncertainty and discomfort and distress. 83 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,320 I'll always view things from this lens of anxiety. 84 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:14,320 Or will this cause rejection? Is this a safe situation to be 85 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:15,640 in, whatever that fear is for you? 86 00:04:16,240 --> 00:04:19,040 And so speaking from my experience, and maybe you guys 87 00:04:19,040 --> 00:04:22,040 can really, anxiety felt like a really permanent fixture. 88 00:04:22,360 --> 00:04:25,680 And I also remember when I was in my early stages of treatment 89 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:28,560 that I identified a lot with my diagnosis. 90 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:31,240 It wasn't like I have depression, I have anxiety. 91 00:04:31,240 --> 00:04:32,760 It was like I'm depressed and anxious. 92 00:04:32,760 --> 00:04:36,280 That was very much a prominent fixture of my identity and my 93 00:04:36,280 --> 00:04:38,000 life. And part of that was because it 94 00:04:38,000 --> 00:04:40,800 was controlling so much my functioning, whether it was, was 95 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:43,440 I able to be at school, what my relationship looked like with 96 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:46,040 family, was I showing up in friendships, Literally just how 97 00:04:46,040 --> 00:04:50,000 I felt on a day-to-day basis. A lot of that was influenced and 98 00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:52,600 dictated by depression, anxiety because I didn't know how to 99 00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:55,200 effectively cope with those things or I didn't have the 100 00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:56,920 right resources and support set up. 101 00:04:57,240 --> 00:05:01,240 And so my identity and turn, I really latched on to that 102 00:05:01,240 --> 00:05:03,680 because it was like an explanation for why I felt this 103 00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:05,120 way. It was a shortcoming on me. 104 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:07,360 It wasn't like this is just how I respond to life. 105 00:05:07,360 --> 00:05:09,480 It was like, it's the anxiety, it's the depression, if that's 106 00:05:09,480 --> 00:05:12,120 what's happening here. And I remember very vividly 107 00:05:12,240 --> 00:05:15,440 being in a partial hospitalization program, which 108 00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:18,560 is basically when you spend a few hours of your day in a 109 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:22,080 hospital setting and you do group therapy, individual 110 00:05:22,080 --> 00:05:24,920 therapy, family therapy. Sometimes you do medication 111 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:28,240 management, both throw in like occupational therapy activities 112 00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:31,360 that you do and you you stay at home, maybe you go to school, 113 00:05:31,360 --> 00:05:34,680 but you also are in this intense setting to learn skills, do the 114 00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:37,400 work, do therapy and have that structure applied to your day. 115 00:05:37,960 --> 00:05:40,280 We were doing art therapy or occupational therapy. 116 00:05:40,280 --> 00:05:42,040 One of the two I can't totally remember. 117 00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:45,720 And we were doing colleges of our identities and ourselves. 118 00:05:45,720 --> 00:05:49,200 And I remember that a lot of people in this group, when they 119 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,720 were creating this picture of themselves and who they were, 120 00:05:51,920 --> 00:05:55,880 depression and anxiety was a really prominent fixture of 121 00:05:55,880 --> 00:05:58,200 their identity and who they were and myself included. 122 00:05:58,200 --> 00:06:01,280 It was like, I'm Sadie, I have this many siblings, I live in 123 00:06:01,280 --> 00:06:04,160 this area, I have a dog, I'm depressed, I'm anxious. 124 00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:06,800 Like it was just, it was part of me, it was part of my identity. 125 00:06:06,800 --> 00:06:09,280 And so I think that can be a really common experience, 126 00:06:09,280 --> 00:06:11,920 especially if you are in intensive treatment. 127 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,000 You're kind of in an echo chamber, like you're only 128 00:06:14,000 --> 00:06:15,600 surrounded by other people that are struggling. 129 00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:18,440 But if you're doing well with your mental health, at least as 130 00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:20,480 a young adult, you're probably not like, oh, these are the 131 00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:22,120 things I'm doing. This is what works here. 132 00:06:22,120 --> 00:06:24,840 So I speak to myself. Here's how I go about creating 133 00:06:24,840 --> 00:06:27,920 my daily schedule so I don't feel overwhelmed and burnt out. 134 00:06:28,600 --> 00:06:31,000 I think that's one of the biggest challenges with the teen 135 00:06:31,000 --> 00:06:33,480 mental health space that I have come across. 136 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:35,480 And I'd love to know your guys's thoughts if you're like, that's 137 00:06:35,480 --> 00:06:36,880 accurate or you're like, there's no way. 138 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,120 But I think that echo chamber really exists. 139 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:42,440 And I really do think it reinforces that identity piece 140 00:06:42,440 --> 00:06:45,440 of anxiety because you're engaging in relationships, 141 00:06:45,440 --> 00:06:47,960 you're building relationships with your therapist, with your 142 00:06:47,960 --> 00:06:51,160 peers based on the fact that you're anxious or depressed. 143 00:06:51,560 --> 00:06:55,520 And a lot of your vulnerability comes from that side of you. 144 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:58,840 When we're vulnerable, that's a really formative piece of 145 00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,480 identity development. And so that can be something to 146 00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:03,160 struggle with. And I think it just adds this 147 00:07:03,160 --> 00:07:04,920 layer like this is a permanent fixture. 148 00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:07,920 This is part of me. And I think it can be really, 149 00:07:07,920 --> 00:07:10,880 really, really helpful to embrace the impermanence of 150 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:13,240 anxiety. And this is pulling in some 151 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:16,680 positive psychology here. But the most effective way to 152 00:07:16,680 --> 00:07:21,200 think about life is that when you have losses, you attribute 153 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:24,080 them to external factors that don't have to do with you. 154 00:07:24,760 --> 00:07:28,200 And when you experience wins, you assign them to yourself and 155 00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:31,160 your personality traits and things that you could control. 156 00:07:31,480 --> 00:07:34,480 So if you do badly on a test, you don't say I'm dumb, I'm 157 00:07:34,480 --> 00:07:37,800 stupid, I'm not good enough. You say that test was hard, I 158 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:41,400 could have studied harder. I didn't understand the material 159 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:43,880 that was going to be on the test, but if you do well on the 160 00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,720 test, you're like, I'm smart, I'm organized, I'm well 161 00:07:46,720 --> 00:07:48,720 prepared. I am a great student. 162 00:07:48,960 --> 00:07:50,960 And this pulls from a lot of research and positive 163 00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:53,200 psychology. And I don't want to like throw 164 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:55,720 all of that at you right now because we're at number one of 165 00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:57,680 like 8 bullet points I'm trying to get through. 166 00:07:58,000 --> 00:08:01,560 But if you can internalize that and remember your losses, your 167 00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:04,480 shortcomings, the quote UN quote negatives, attribute that to 168 00:08:04,560 --> 00:08:07,280 external things and the wins, the positive, the good things in 169 00:08:07,280 --> 00:08:09,240 your life, attribute them to yourself. 170 00:08:09,840 --> 00:08:11,400 And anxiety is one of those things. 171 00:08:11,400 --> 00:08:13,400 It's external. We're feeling anxiety, we're 172 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:16,720 experiencing anxiety. We're not anxious as a baseline. 173 00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:19,200 And I know maybe it's objectively feels different. 174 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:20,240 It feels like a permanent fixture. 175 00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:21,960 And you've been struggling with this for so long. 176 00:08:22,320 --> 00:08:26,600 And we know that our personality traits change a lot, not only in 177 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,120 adolescents, but through adulthood. 178 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:31,240 And especially as a teen, the way that you interact with your 179 00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:34,320 emotions and experience them subjectively is so, so, so 180 00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:36,039 different from how you'll feel them in 10 years. 181 00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:38,240 And the way that you cope with things, the way that you set up 182 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:41,000 your life, I promise the things that are making you anxious now 183 00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:43,440 won't be the same things that make you anxious in 10 years. 184 00:08:43,799 --> 00:08:47,560 And arguably you won't be as anxious or as distressed on a 185 00:08:47,560 --> 00:08:50,160 larger scale. So that's my first thing. 186 00:08:50,160 --> 00:08:52,840 And a skill that you can use for this is the ride the Wave skill. 187 00:08:53,120 --> 00:08:55,200 And this is from DBT. We're going to talk lots about 188 00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:58,320 DBT in today's episode, but the skills in the distress tolerance 189 00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:00,400 module. And so we have this big picture 190 00:09:00,800 --> 00:09:03,280 anxiety is impermanent. We're not attaching it to our 191 00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:05,280 identity. It will change. 192 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:08,160 The research supports that. But in the moment when you're 193 00:09:08,160 --> 00:09:10,280 having a panic attack, when you're having those thoughts 194 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:14,160 spirals, when it's all you can think about, I want you to 195 00:09:14,680 --> 00:09:18,840 imagine and visualize each anxiety symptom and each thought 196 00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:21,320 as a wave. These things aren't constant, 197 00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:25,600 consistent levels of experience. The thought will be more 198 00:09:25,600 --> 00:09:27,480 intense, and then you'll get sidetracked and then you'll come 199 00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:29,600 back. Your heart rate is going to be 200 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:31,520 increased and then it'll go down, and then it'll go up 201 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:32,240 again. Same thing. 202 00:09:32,240 --> 00:09:33,760 Your breathing will go up and then it'll go down. 203 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:35,560 Your muscles will be clenched, but then you release them for a 204 00:09:35,560 --> 00:09:37,320 SEC. All of these things happened in 205 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,200 waves. And so if you can bring your 206 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:41,600 attention, do whichever 1 is the most front of mind. 207 00:09:41,600 --> 00:09:43,520 Is it your breath? Is it your heart rate? 208 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:44,840 Is it your muscles being clenched? 209 00:09:44,840 --> 00:09:47,800 Is it the thought? Pay attention to the wave like 210 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:49,960 nature. You can picture the wave going 211 00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:53,320 up on the shore and then going back and retreating and really 212 00:09:53,320 --> 00:09:56,200 lean into that idea of this isn't permanent, it's lessening 213 00:09:56,480 --> 00:09:58,640 right now. It's not staying consistent. 214 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:01,760 And this too shall pass. So you can use that long term 215 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:04,160 and short term. And I find that to be really 216 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:05,920 effective and one of my favorite skills here. 217 00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:10,880 The next thing I wanted to touch on was the evolutionary purpose 218 00:10:10,880 --> 00:10:12,760 of anxiety. This is one of my favorite 219 00:10:12,760 --> 00:10:15,520 things that I've learned in college, which is that the way 220 00:10:15,520 --> 00:10:17,480 we experience anxiety serves a purpose. 221 00:10:17,480 --> 00:10:21,040 There's not no reason for it. And when we understand why we're 222 00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:23,840 feeling the way we do and the reactions we have, I think it 223 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:26,080 reduces a lot of the shame, a lot of the blame. 224 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:29,600 And then you can get into, OK, how can I work with this 225 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:33,400 biological part of me and cope with it more effectively? 226 00:10:33,840 --> 00:10:37,320 So a lot of the ways that we experience emotions go back to 227 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:41,120 Cavemen days and how we evolved because humans evolved very, 228 00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:44,560 very, very slowly. And so our brains and our bodies 229 00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:47,280 have not evolved past what we were doing when we were living 230 00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:50,600 in the wild with no shelter and we were hunting and gathering 231 00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:54,320 and all these things. Like our bodies and brains are 232 00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:58,000 not evolved to be living in cities and towns and our biggest 233 00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:02,720 stressors being like school and the SA TS and a conflict in our 234 00:11:02,720 --> 00:11:04,840 social group. Like our bodies are still 235 00:11:04,840 --> 00:11:08,400 functioning as if we were living in the middle of nowhere in a 236 00:11:08,400 --> 00:11:10,120 cave. And so one of the really 237 00:11:10,120 --> 00:11:12,280 prominent ways that shows up is anxiety. 238 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:14,560 And I'm sure most of you guys have heard of fight or flight. 239 00:11:14,560 --> 00:11:17,560 Like when we experience a threat where they respond by trying to 240 00:11:17,560 --> 00:11:22,160 fight it or we flee and we get away and out of that situation 241 00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:24,640 and sometimes people freeze. It's another response to 242 00:11:25,080 --> 00:11:27,520 distress and a threat in a situation. 243 00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:30,280 And so I'm not going to touch on that as much because I feel like 244 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,160 you've probably heard of the fight or flight response. 245 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:35,720 But I want to talk about the specific purposes that each of 246 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:37,800 them have because I think it's really interesting. 247 00:11:37,800 --> 00:11:40,800 Maybe this is the nerd in me. But also, again, takes away some 248 00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,760 of that shame. And you can interface with these 249 00:11:42,760 --> 00:11:44,800 feelings in a different way. Like, that's funny. 250 00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:47,240 That's such an ineffective way for my body to respond. 251 00:11:47,480 --> 00:11:50,320 I know I can't control it, but I don't need this evolutionary 252 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:53,160 response because I actually live in a house and not in a cave 253 00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:56,040 with a lion outside. So the first one is social 254 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:58,800 anxiety. At our core, our number one 255 00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:02,880 wiring is relationships. If we don't find partners and 256 00:12:02,880 --> 00:12:05,000 reproduce, our species goes extinct. 257 00:12:05,440 --> 00:12:09,200 If we don't stay in a group of other individuals, we would be 258 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:11,600 killed off instantly. Like we're not very physically 259 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:13,880 strong. We're not a shark, we're not a 260 00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:17,880 killer whale, we're not a lion. Like we don't have the physical 261 00:12:17,880 --> 00:12:20,560 strength or capabilities to fight a predator. 262 00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:24,320 So the ways that humans survived were by staying in groups and 263 00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:26,680 some of US would be hunting, some of them would be protecting 264 00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:30,360 The Cave, all of us together would fight off a larger animal, 265 00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:33,080 but we were not surviving if we were alone. 266 00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:35,360 And that survival, the fittest, the fittest were in a group 267 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:37,280 together. And so that's what prevailed. 268 00:12:37,280 --> 00:12:40,560 And so these instincts, we have to be in a group and stay in a 269 00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:43,880 group and form relationships are really, really, really strong. 270 00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,160 And social anxiety is a way that that shows up. 271 00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,480 Will I be rejected? Will I be accepted? 272 00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:51,680 It's the most innate human need to be accepted because your 273 00:12:51,680 --> 00:12:54,320 survival depended on it. And so when you have these 274 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:56,640 moments of like, Oh my gosh, I'm so worried people are going to 275 00:12:56,640 --> 00:12:59,920 laugh at me or reject me, or I'm not going to be accepted into 276 00:12:59,920 --> 00:13:01,320 this friend group or whatever it is. 277 00:13:01,560 --> 00:13:03,480 Remember, that's not a reflection of you not being 278 00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:05,960 confident enough or you not being brave enough. 279 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:08,200 Like that's just your body doing what it's supposed to do to 280 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:09,960 survive. Your body thinks, Oh my gosh, 281 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:11,880 there's so much riding on this. If I don't have this 282 00:13:11,880 --> 00:13:14,960 conversation or it be accepted into this group, I'll be 283 00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:16,880 attacked by the lion. And that's not the case. 284 00:13:16,880 --> 00:13:19,280 But your body doesn't know that. So social anxiety has this 285 00:13:19,280 --> 00:13:23,520 really, really strong, arguably the most intense wiring from an 286 00:13:23,520 --> 00:13:26,120 evolutionary perspective. And so your body's doing its 287 00:13:26,120 --> 00:13:30,000 job, it's serving its purpose. Similarly related to social 288 00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:33,120 anxiety, when you have those anxiety urges to stay home and 289 00:13:33,120 --> 00:13:35,920 withdraw and stay with family and friends and like not do 290 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:39,680 things that put our resources at risk, that's also our anxiety 291 00:13:39,680 --> 00:13:41,400 from an evolutionary perspective. 292 00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,240 We want to protect what we have and not lose these important 293 00:13:44,240 --> 00:13:47,440 resources, whether it's family or friends or now in modern day, 294 00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:50,680 maybe it's something related to a grade, which then would in 295 00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:54,880 turn potentially impact our success and acceptance or doing 296 00:13:54,880 --> 00:13:57,960 well in a sport or an activity. And again, acceptance and 297 00:13:57,960 --> 00:14:00,960 cohesion, like all of these things are driven by these very 298 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:06,080 internal biological systems. Now, in a panic attack, like in 299 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:08,120 fight or flight mode, there's some really interesting ways 300 00:14:08,120 --> 00:14:10,480 that your body responds. So I'm going to quickly go over 301 00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:12,440 what those are because it can hang the funny end. 302 00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:14,720 Interesting to understand and unpack. 303 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:18,600 So the first one is you sweat. The reason that you sweat is 304 00:14:18,600 --> 00:14:21,280 that if you were in theory running away from a predator, 305 00:14:21,400 --> 00:14:24,040 your sweat makes you more slippery, so you're more likely 306 00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:25,920 to escape from them if they grab onto you. 307 00:14:26,200 --> 00:14:28,200 Like it's literally why you sweat when you're anxious 308 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:29,640 because you are in fight or flight mode. 309 00:14:29,880 --> 00:14:32,600 And if you're in flight and this predator tries to grab you but 310 00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:34,880 you're slippery, you're more likely to get away. 311 00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,040 Same thing. You probably get stomach aches 312 00:14:37,040 --> 00:14:39,040 when you're anxious. This is because your body's 313 00:14:39,040 --> 00:14:40,720 like, we're not digesting things right now. 314 00:14:40,720 --> 00:14:45,040 Your digestive system is put on pause and your blood flow and 315 00:14:45,040 --> 00:14:48,120 other systems like your increased oxygen to your 316 00:14:48,120 --> 00:14:50,840 extremities and being able to see better and hear better, 317 00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:53,800 those are prioritized. So your digestive systems put on 318 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:56,360 pause and then you get a stomach ache because nothing's being 319 00:14:56,360 --> 00:14:59,080 digested again. It serves a purpose. 320 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:02,600 Same thing. Also your heart rate increases, 321 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:05,400 your breathing rate increases. That's because your body is 322 00:15:05,400 --> 00:15:08,080 preparing you to run and get away from the threat. 323 00:15:08,080 --> 00:15:10,960 So there's more oxygen being pumped to your limbs so that 324 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,800 you're ready to engage those muscles. 325 00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:15,680 Your might have that experience when you're having a panic 326 00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:18,200 attack, like everything is so loud and everything so bright 327 00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,560 around me. Your eyesight and your hearing 328 00:15:20,560 --> 00:15:23,040 literally gets better and more attuned when you're in fight or 329 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:25,000 flight mode because you have to be aware of the threats and the 330 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:26,280 predator that might be coming at you. 331 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:29,400 So we have really interesting ways that we respond from an 332 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:32,160 evolutionary perspective. I think it takes a lot of power 333 00:15:32,160 --> 00:15:34,720 away from these symptoms because that can be the most distressing 334 00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:37,720 part of an anxiety attack or a panic attack cause being like, I 335 00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:39,960 can't breathe, I can't control my body. 336 00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:42,880 I feel like I'm dying. And when you break that down, 337 00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:46,200 you're like my body's reacting exactly how it's supposed to and 338 00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,760 you can take some of that power away. 339 00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:50,880 I'm sweating because I'm trying to be slippery and get away from 340 00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:53,040 a predator. My heart rate and breathing rate 341 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:56,200 are not increasing because I'm having a heart attack. 342 00:15:56,320 --> 00:15:59,040 My body is just trying to get more oxygen to my muscles so 343 00:15:59,040 --> 00:16:01,680 that I can maybe run faster and more efficiently. 344 00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:05,280 My stomach's hurting not because I have this illness or that I 345 00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:08,080 need to go to a doctor, but my body has decided to stop 346 00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:10,600 digesting my food so that I can run away. 347 00:16:11,040 --> 00:16:13,560 And so engaging with these symptoms less, like I don't know 348 00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:15,560 what's happening, I can't control this, but my body's 349 00:16:15,560 --> 00:16:17,280 doing exactly what it's supposed to do. 350 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:21,560 And the response it's having is kind of funny and kind of dumb 351 00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:23,200 that we haven't evolved past that point. 352 00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:25,920 So that's something I wanted to share and point out because I 353 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:28,360 know those physical symptoms can be so overwhelming and 354 00:16:28,360 --> 00:16:30,640 distressing. And so I hope those non 355 00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:33,560 alternative explanations because they are the explanations, but I 356 00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:36,560 hope that information can be helpful because it's 357 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,160 interesting, but also I think holds a lot of utility and 358 00:16:39,160 --> 00:16:42,600 taking that power away from it. The next thing that I wanted to 359 00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:46,560 touch on is the fact that everyone can empathize with what 360 00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:48,280 you're experiencing and you might be like. 361 00:16:48,840 --> 00:16:51,120 My friends and family have never had panic attacks before. 362 00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:54,240 Why isn't anyone else's anxious about taking the SAT or this 363 00:16:54,240 --> 00:16:56,160 test coming up? Everyone else seems to be making 364 00:16:56,160 --> 00:16:57,880 friends. I can't talk to a single like 365 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,320 what are you talking about that everyone can relate? 366 00:17:00,880 --> 00:17:03,880 We all experience emotions. Again for evolutionary purposes. 367 00:17:04,119 --> 00:17:07,480 Shame keeps us embedded in a group so that we don't end up 368 00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:09,920 alone and not able to fight off threats. 369 00:17:09,920 --> 00:17:13,720 Sadness prevents us from losing resources that are important to 370 00:17:13,720 --> 00:17:16,560 us. Guilt forces us to repair our 371 00:17:16,560 --> 00:17:19,640 relationships so again, we don't get rejected and exiled from 372 00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:23,640 these really important groups. Anger helps us fight off threats 373 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,680 and keep things that are important to us. 374 00:17:25,880 --> 00:17:30,040 Happiness motivates us to go out and get more of these resources 375 00:17:30,040 --> 00:17:31,640 and things that boost our well-being. 376 00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:35,040 Keep these things that keep us thriving and reinforce these 377 00:17:35,040 --> 00:17:37,480 behaviors that allow us to thrive and succeed. 378 00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:41,600 Like having resources, having relationships, and then fear and 379 00:17:41,600 --> 00:17:45,560 anxiety keeps us alive. It keeps us from these threats 380 00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:48,520 that at one point literally were life or death. 381 00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:51,520 So if you are a human, you experience fear. 382 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:55,360 And the things that we experience fear too today, like 383 00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:59,160 a test or a new conversation with someone or asking for help, 384 00:17:59,880 --> 00:18:02,520 maybe it's not justified in the larger scale of things. 385 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:06,280 Maybe it's a disproportionate reaction, but it's still a valid 386 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:08,480 reaction. And we all have those emotions. 387 00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,160 Everyone can relate to fear on some level because those 388 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:14,720 evolutionary processes still take place and fear gets evoked 389 00:18:14,720 --> 00:18:16,240 in everyone at some point in their life. 390 00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:19,160 And so even though you might be thinking no one gets how it's 391 00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:20,920 just I am. No one gets how much this 392 00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:23,720 determines my life. We can all empathize with the 393 00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:29,360 experience of being scared or ashamed or uncertain or 394 00:18:29,360 --> 00:18:33,640 distressed and asking for help about those things. 395 00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:36,320 Talking to others about their experiences there and what 396 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:39,800 worked, and just connecting and taking the power away from those 397 00:18:39,800 --> 00:18:42,800 anxious experiences by labeling them and unpacking them is 398 00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:46,320 extremely powerful. So I want you to know that 399 00:18:46,360 --> 00:18:49,600 everyone has experienced anxiety to some degrees. 400 00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:52,480 You can talk about it even if it seems like you're coping with it 401 00:18:52,480 --> 00:18:54,480 differently or you're experiencing it to a higher 402 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:57,760 level. And the other thing to mention 403 00:18:57,760 --> 00:19:01,640 here is anxiety is complicated because we all get anxious, but 404 00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:04,640 we might not all have generalized anxiety disorder. 405 00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:07,680 And we've done episodes on this before where it's like, why do 406 00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,160 we have these mental illness diagnosis? 407 00:19:10,160 --> 00:19:12,440 And they serve different purposes like getting insurance 408 00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:15,360 coverage for treatment and being able to do specific research on 409 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:18,440 these specific things. But when we have these 410 00:19:18,440 --> 00:19:22,000 colloquial discussions about like, I have anxiety, I'm 411 00:19:22,000 --> 00:19:24,600 anxious versus I have generalized anxiety disorder or 412 00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:29,200 I have social anxiety disorder, The key thing there and how to 413 00:19:29,240 --> 00:19:31,960 evaluate that for yourself, which of course you need to get 414 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:33,840 a diagnosis from a doctor if you're going to bill your 415 00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:35,280 insurance for that kind of treatment. 416 00:19:35,520 --> 00:19:37,680 But if you're kind of like, do I need help? 417 00:19:37,720 --> 00:19:40,480 Do I want to ask for help? Like, do I just feel anxious 418 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,120 sometimes? Or is this something I need 419 00:19:42,120 --> 00:19:45,440 support with? What we look at with abnormal 420 00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:49,360 psychology or psychopathology is, is it causing you distress? 421 00:19:49,760 --> 00:19:52,320 Does the way that you're experiencing anxiety not just 422 00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:54,040 like, Oh my gosh, that thing made me anxious. 423 00:19:54,040 --> 00:19:56,680 I coped with it, it went away. I moved on with my life. 424 00:19:57,120 --> 00:19:59,880 Is it causing you significant distress to where it's 425 00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:02,800 interfering with your quality of life and your well-being? 426 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:06,280 And the second question there is, is it interfering with your 427 00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,800 functioning? Are you able to go to school to 428 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:10,600 work? Complete your assignments? 429 00:20:10,600 --> 00:20:13,720 Show up in your relationships? And if the answer is yes, it's 430 00:20:13,720 --> 00:20:16,280 causing distress and yes, it's interfering with my ability to 431 00:20:16,280 --> 00:20:19,800 function, that's when it's time to ask for help and get support. 432 00:20:19,840 --> 00:20:22,520 And not to say that you can't get help or support before that 433 00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:24,600 point, absolutely do. And I would recommend that. 434 00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:27,000 But that's kind of what we look at when it's psychopathology 435 00:20:27,000 --> 00:20:30,640 versus like typical human experiences that we all have and 436 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:33,720 struggle with. So basically just to add that 437 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:37,520 nuance and layer to this episode because it's complex in that we 438 00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:40,440 all have anxiety, we all get anxious, and we might not all 439 00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,800 have anxiety disorders and we might not all need intensive 440 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:46,040 treatment. But again, we can all empathize 441 00:20:46,040 --> 00:20:48,160 because we all get anxious and experience anxiety. 442 00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:52,080 And not to take away from these really intense experiences that 443 00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:54,960 for some people cause a lot of distress and absolutely 444 00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:58,400 interfere with life as a whole. The next thing we're going to 445 00:20:58,400 --> 00:21:01,240 touch on is CBT or cognitive behavioral therapy. 446 00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:03,600 And I went to ABCT this weekend, which was so fun. 447 00:21:03,600 --> 00:21:07,520 And I've listened to a lot of panels about CBT and ways that 448 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:10,320 that is used for depression and anxiety and exposure therapy. 449 00:21:10,320 --> 00:21:11,800 And we're going to get into all of it. 450 00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:16,560 But one of the basic parts of CBT is the CBT cycle, which is 451 00:21:16,560 --> 00:21:20,320 that we have the cycle of thoughts, behaviors, and 452 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,600 feelings. And it's like a continuous loop. 453 00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:27,400 When we feel something, we then think something and then we have 454 00:21:27,400 --> 00:21:29,640 a behavior and response. And then the behavior and 455 00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,360 response then causes feelings, which cause thoughts, which 456 00:21:32,360 --> 00:21:34,480 cause behaviors, and it just goes on and on and on. 457 00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:39,800 And so why people get CBT treatment or pursue support in 458 00:21:39,800 --> 00:21:43,480 this area is the idea that some way that we're thinking and 459 00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,760 behaving with our emotions is ineffective. 460 00:21:45,920 --> 00:21:47,360 Maybe it's how we're coping with them. 461 00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:50,160 Maybe it's how we're thinking about situations. 462 00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:52,920 Like when you're in a new social environment and no one 463 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:54,360 immediately comes up to talk to you. 464 00:21:54,360 --> 00:21:57,600 If you think I and not good enough, no one wants to be 465 00:21:57,600 --> 00:22:00,200 friends with me versus OK, no one knows me. 466 00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:03,120 They're also probably nervous. And it's not really like a thing 467 00:22:03,120 --> 00:22:06,040 where everyone just approaches everyone in every situation to 468 00:22:06,040 --> 00:22:08,480 introduce themselves. Someone has to like make that 469 00:22:08,480 --> 00:22:10,880 brave leap and maybe you have to be the one to initiate it. 470 00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:14,880 So CBD kind of has this idea behind it that something about 471 00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:17,280 the way we're behaving and thinking is ineffective and is 472 00:22:17,280 --> 00:22:20,120 there for a lot of times causing us to stress and interfering 473 00:22:20,120 --> 00:22:22,680 with our quality of life. Like I mentioned earlier in this 474 00:22:22,680 --> 00:22:24,400 episode, we can't wheel away our anxiety. 475 00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:26,800 We can't wake up. I'm not going to be anxious, I'm 476 00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:29,200 not going to have anxiety. It's just, it's not me. 477 00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:31,040 It's not happening, not part of my life. 478 00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:35,240 It just doesn't work that way. But we do have a lot of agency 479 00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:37,200 over our thoughts and our behaviors. 480 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:39,440 And I'm sure you're like, what are you talking? 481 00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:40,800 I, I've tried to think differently. 482 00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:42,920 I try and behave differently. It's really hard and it's really 483 00:22:42,920 --> 00:22:45,240 impossible, and I totally get that. 484 00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:47,480 And one of the reasons for that is you've been thinking in the 485 00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:49,920 same way for so long and behaving in the same way for so 486 00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:51,280 long that it's almost like a habit. 487 00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:54,080 You've reinforced that way of thinking and acting that it 488 00:22:54,080 --> 00:22:57,360 takes so much power to then overcome that way of thinking 489 00:22:57,360 --> 00:22:59,480 and behaving. And so this can be really hard 490 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:03,000 and really challenging. And this is the way to interrupt 491 00:23:03,000 --> 00:23:06,960 these ineffective patterns. And so to shift our feelings and 492 00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:10,000 to shift that anxiety, we adjust the way that we think about 493 00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:13,320 situations or appraise them, if you want to use the psychology 494 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:16,280 term, and how we behave in those situations. 495 00:23:16,280 --> 00:23:18,640 So how we cope with anxiety? Do we avoid? 496 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:21,360 Do we run away? Do we think this is never going 497 00:23:21,360 --> 00:23:23,080 to get better? I'm just not even going to try. 498 00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:26,760 Or do we say, OK, I'm feeling anxious right now, That's OK. 499 00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:29,720 What are the coping skills that I know work for when I'm feeling 500 00:23:29,720 --> 00:23:31,640 this way? All right, my behavior, I'm 501 00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:33,640 going to do some deep breathing. I'm going to give myself a 502 00:23:33,640 --> 00:23:34,880 minute. I'm going to give myself a 503 00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,840 mental pep talk, and then I'm going to move forward into the 504 00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:41,160 situation. So that's the kind of CBT cycle 505 00:23:41,280 --> 00:23:43,440 framework I think that's really important to mention here. 506 00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:46,280 And we're going to talk about some DBT skills, but we're like 507 00:23:46,360 --> 00:23:48,920 rather far into this episode and we can do a whole other episode 508 00:23:48,920 --> 00:23:50,720 just about CBT if you guys wanted to. 509 00:23:50,920 --> 00:23:53,160 But I think it's a helpful thing to remember in the context of 510 00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:56,000 anxiety that we can't necessarily control the feelings 511 00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:57,760 themselves. Remember, they have really 512 00:23:57,800 --> 00:24:01,240 prominent evolutionary purposes. Those aren't going to go away, 513 00:24:01,360 --> 00:24:04,200 but we can change how we think about them and we can change how 514 00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:06,760 we behave in response to them. And if you've been feeling this 515 00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:09,480 way for a really long time and maybe not coping as effectively 516 00:24:09,480 --> 00:24:10,800 as you could, it's going to be hard. 517 00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:15,520 And also it's very possible. The next thing I want to mention 518 00:24:15,520 --> 00:24:18,280 is that the biggest thing with anxiety, if you take nothing 519 00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,800 away from this episode except for this, is that the TLDR 520 00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:23,160 avoidance amplifies your anxiety. 521 00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:26,320 Every time you avoid something that you're anxious of, you 522 00:24:26,320 --> 00:24:28,640 become more anxious the next time you encounter it. 523 00:24:29,040 --> 00:24:34,360 So if you're scared of flying and you never get on a plane, 524 00:24:34,360 --> 00:24:37,160 you never go near an airport, you don't watch any videos or 525 00:24:37,160 --> 00:24:39,440 read any books that have anything to do with flying. 526 00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:42,320 If it has to do with a plane or flight, you ignore it. 527 00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:44,160 You run away, you go the opposite direction. 528 00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:48,160 Every time you've avoided that thing that might cause you to 529 00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:51,960 stress, the level of anxiety you experience the next time gets 530 00:24:52,000 --> 00:24:54,920 even bigger because you've reinforced that idea that this 531 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:57,680 thing is scary and dangerous and I shouldn't go towards it and 532 00:24:57,680 --> 00:24:59,600 it's just going to make me anxious and give me bad 533 00:24:59,600 --> 00:25:02,400 feelings, so I absolutely should not put myself in that 534 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:04,800 situation. So every time you avoid that 535 00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:07,600 thing, you're reinforcing the idea that it's dangerous and bad 536 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,760 and it'll cause you to stress since the next time you approach 537 00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:13,240 it, you're even more anxious. And yes, the urge to avoid is 538 00:25:13,240 --> 00:25:15,240 even stronger. It's the best thing that you can 539 00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:18,560 do if anything brings you to stress or makes you anxious is 540 00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:22,440 exposure therapy. This is CBT principle and it's 541 00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:23,880 really, really, really effective. 542 00:25:23,880 --> 00:25:27,800 We use it at anxiety. We use it in OCD and the idea is 543 00:25:27,800 --> 00:25:30,360 that you expose yourself to things that make you anxious in 544 00:25:30,360 --> 00:25:34,360 a way that is manageable to cope with, and you build mastery over 545 00:25:34,360 --> 00:25:36,400 that anxiety and over that thing. 546 00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:39,760 So say you are scared by social interactions, you're scared to 547 00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,400 make friends, you're scared to approach people in new places. 548 00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,040 You would start out small. Maybe you reply anonymously, 549 00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:48,120 like on a Reddit thread or a pen. 550 00:25:48,120 --> 00:25:51,040 We have side chat. So you start anonymously and 551 00:25:51,040 --> 00:25:52,640 then you're like, Oh my God, anxious. 552 00:25:52,640 --> 00:25:54,880 Like what if someone figures out, even if it's a nice comic, 553 00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:57,080 you're like, someone figures out it's me and then they respond to 554 00:25:57,080 --> 00:26:00,760 me and it becomes a whole thing. And then you do your deep 555 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:03,280 breathing, you cope with that anxiety. 556 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:08,280 It's OK, you are still alive. The next day you're like, OK, I 557 00:26:08,280 --> 00:26:10,240 handled that anxiety. I worked through it. 558 00:26:10,600 --> 00:26:14,560 I was OK, I'm going to leave a comment on someone's Instagram, 559 00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:17,640 maybe start with like the New York Times or like a big page 560 00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:18,880 that isn't going to see your comment. 561 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:21,560 And you are like, love this. So interesting. 562 00:26:21,560 --> 00:26:23,720 Whatever it is, you're probably a little anxious. 563 00:26:23,720 --> 00:26:25,680 I'm going to be, your heart is beating, maybe you're breathing 564 00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:28,120 faster, maybe your thoughts are spiraling a bit. 565 00:26:28,400 --> 00:26:30,240 You breathe through it. You're like, I'm feeling 566 00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,680 anxious, that's OK, that makes sense. 567 00:26:32,680 --> 00:26:36,440 I've avoided this in the past. I'm worried about being rejected 568 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:38,200 or judged. That's a completely normal thing 569 00:26:38,200 --> 00:26:42,560 to feel and I'm going to be OK. You work through the anxiety, 570 00:26:42,560 --> 00:26:44,680 you cope with that. Then maybe you leave a comment 571 00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:48,080 on an Instagram of someone that you know and you work through 572 00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:50,320 that anxiety and you keep moving your way up the cycle. 573 00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:53,520 So then maybe you go and order a coffee and you ask the barista 574 00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:57,160 how their day is going. Maybe you ask for help in the 575 00:26:57,160 --> 00:26:59,440 library to find a book or at a store. 576 00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:00,880 Be like, do you have this size and something? 577 00:27:00,880 --> 00:27:06,560 You get practice and then you go somewhere like a conference or a 578 00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:08,560 class where you never have to see that person again. 579 00:27:08,560 --> 00:27:11,480 It's like a one time thing. You talk to someone, you leave, 580 00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:12,920 you're never going to cross paths again. 581 00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:15,480 Then maybe you do it in a class where you'll see them every 582 00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:17,200 week. So you introduce yourself, you 583 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:20,600 say hi, and there's that increased amount of like you'll 584 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:22,280 continue to see them if this goes badly. 585 00:27:22,280 --> 00:27:26,240 And then you work your way up to introducing yourself to someone. 586 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:28,880 Maybe you ask if they want to study together or if they want 587 00:27:28,880 --> 00:27:32,200 to go and like do an activity or like go get coffee or something 588 00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:34,640 like that. So you work your way up to this 589 00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:38,640 really big scary thing, which is approaching a stranger, making 590 00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:42,000 small talk, and then trying to have a next step that would then 591 00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:44,680 continue into a friendship. And some people call this 592 00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,680 rejection therapy. Some people call it exposure 593 00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:48,360 therapy. It's big on TikTok right now. 594 00:27:48,360 --> 00:27:50,360 Like people will stand up on airplanes and be like, I hope 595 00:27:50,360 --> 00:27:54,040 everyone has a great flight. And I still have a new segment 596 00:27:54,040 --> 00:27:55,400 on it. But this works. 597 00:27:55,480 --> 00:27:57,760 There's a lot of research and literature showing its 598 00:27:57,760 --> 00:27:59,680 effectiveness. And I think this is one of the 599 00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:01,640 best skills you can have in your pocket. 600 00:28:01,680 --> 00:28:05,280 And for anyone, whether you have an anxiety disorder or we all 601 00:28:05,280 --> 00:28:08,840 feel fear at some point, anytime something brings you to stress, 602 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:11,880 you should absolutely do a little bit of exposure therapy. 603 00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:14,640 So maybe that anxiety is about raising your hand in class, 604 00:28:14,960 --> 00:28:17,360 Practice with staying after class to ask a question, 605 00:28:17,360 --> 00:28:21,320 practice going to office hours, work up to asking that question 606 00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:24,120 in class in front of everyone. Maybe you're really nervous 607 00:28:24,120 --> 00:28:27,520 about your final exam. You're going to start by doing a 608 00:28:27,520 --> 00:28:30,600 smaller quiz somewhere early on the semester. 609 00:28:30,600 --> 00:28:32,840 Maybe you go to the room where your exam is and practice 610 00:28:32,840 --> 00:28:35,000 mentally. OK, I'm sitting down to put in 611 00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,840 the timer on the board, I'm taking the test, that type of 612 00:28:37,840 --> 00:28:40,400 thing. So anytime anything brings you 613 00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,760 to stress, know if you avoid it, it will amplify that anxiety. 614 00:28:44,040 --> 00:28:48,480 So do that small step to expose yourself to that anxiety in a 615 00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:51,360 healthy and Safeway. And then if you have a really 616 00:28:51,360 --> 00:28:54,360 big fear or a really big phobia, typically you'll work with a 617 00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:57,000 therapist or clinician. You'll do an exposure hierarchy. 618 00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:59,400 So you make that list that we talked about like this is the 619 00:28:59,400 --> 00:29:03,040 scariest, worst thing possible that I could imagine, like 620 00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:04,840 approaching a stranger and trying to make friends with 621 00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:06,600 them. This first thing I want to start 622 00:29:06,600 --> 00:29:08,160 with is leaving an anonymous comment. 623 00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:10,200 So that's the exposure hierarchy. 624 00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:12,560 And then you make all the list in between and you check your 625 00:29:12,560 --> 00:29:14,480 way up and you go through the list and you get therapeutic 626 00:29:14,480 --> 00:29:17,120 support. We had Doctor Han Schroeder on 627 00:29:17,120 --> 00:29:18,920 the podcast from the University of Michigan. 628 00:29:18,920 --> 00:29:21,320 We talked about depression and I'll leave that link in the show 629 00:29:21,320 --> 00:29:25,160 notes, but I am a member in his lab now and I hope he's OK with 630 00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:28,160 me sharing this. He emailed US one week and was 631 00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:29,480 like I'm so sorry I'm super sick. 632 00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:31,160 We're going to have to reschedule for the following 633 00:29:31,160 --> 00:29:32,360 week. And he comes on zoo and he's 634 00:29:32,360 --> 00:29:35,240 like, guys, I was doing exposure therapy with the patient as I do 635 00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:39,120 every week, and I ate a cookie off a toilet seat as I do every 636 00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:41,720 week. And I got violently I'll and we 637 00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:44,600 were like, what? But it just was like a funny 638 00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:45,880 story. If you go to therapy for the 639 00:29:45,880 --> 00:29:48,280 first time, they're not going to like throw you into eating food 640 00:29:48,280 --> 00:29:51,080 off of toilet seats. It's going to be OK, I promise. 641 00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:54,240 But this is something that is used all the time in therapy. 642 00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:56,200 There's like really cool and fun creative ways that they 643 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:58,720 implement it. Again, lots of research showing 644 00:29:58,720 --> 00:30:00,840 its effectiveness. It really works. 645 00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:03,120 I'm trying to think if there was any funny exposures that I did 646 00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:05,000 in treatment. We had vulnerability groups 647 00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:06,560 every week. We just practice sharing 648 00:30:06,560 --> 00:30:09,920 something vulnerable and we did karaoke group, which honestly 649 00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:13,160 was my biggest exposure. And I do think that fear serves 650 00:30:13,160 --> 00:30:16,200 a purpose because if I sing, then I'm being a little 651 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,800 hyperbolic here, but like I should be rejected by everyone 652 00:30:18,800 --> 00:30:21,560 that knows me because I'm so bad at singing like that. 653 00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:24,160 Fear is serving a purpose because this is not a skill. 654 00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:27,160 It does repulse people. So yeah, we did karaoke, which 655 00:30:27,160 --> 00:30:29,960 brought me a lot of anxiety. I think I, I'm pretty sure I lip 656 00:30:29,960 --> 00:30:31,680 synched. I like had another friend do it 657 00:30:31,680 --> 00:30:34,440 with me and I was lip syncing Happy birthday because I'm so 658 00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:36,960 bad at singing guys. I really wish I was good and 659 00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:40,880 completely, completely tone deaf and I wish I was better. 660 00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:44,480 I'm just not. We did a more rejection therapy 661 00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:47,480 type thing. So we'd pull different tasks 662 00:30:47,480 --> 00:30:49,960 from a hat and one of them would be like go up to someone in the 663 00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:53,520 cafeteria and bargain with them to trade lunch or go up to 664 00:30:53,520 --> 00:30:54,960 someone asked for their phone number. 665 00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:57,960 These tasks that people will likely say no to, but you 666 00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:00,840 practice getting rejected. So they're really fun ways that 667 00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:02,760 exploded therapy is implemented. It's great. 668 00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:05,640 Not a downside to doing. It's a great skill to build to 669 00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:08,840 kind of be able to tolerate that distress and practice coping 670 00:31:08,840 --> 00:31:10,960 with it and then overcome these things that you might be 671 00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:13,320 avoiding. And that's a really another big 672 00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:15,880 kind of philosophy. And part of DBT is that you're 673 00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:18,520 avoiding things in life and there's that that level of not 674 00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:21,080 wanting to engage with your emotions because of the level of 675 00:31:21,080 --> 00:31:23,800 distress they're causing. So now we're going to talk about 676 00:31:23,800 --> 00:31:24,880 skills. We're going to talk about long 677 00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:26,960 term skills and short term skills that you guys can use 678 00:31:26,960 --> 00:31:28,720 with anxiety. And I wish I knew these going 679 00:31:28,720 --> 00:31:30,280 into it. And then what last, I'm going to 680 00:31:30,280 --> 00:31:32,920 talk about why anxiety is good, which also is something we don't 681 00:31:32,920 --> 00:31:35,320 talk about a lot. So long term skills, we're going 682 00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:38,480 to talk about 3 DBT scales. So just coping ahead, building 683 00:31:38,480 --> 00:31:41,320 mastery and the please scale. So coping ahead is one of the 684 00:31:41,320 --> 00:31:44,600 best skills if you have a situation that you're really 685 00:31:44,600 --> 00:31:46,320 anxious about. So not just day-to-day, like, 686 00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:48,000 Oh, I always feel like I'm kind of anxious. 687 00:31:48,000 --> 00:31:50,400 My thoughts are always kind of going like I'm never just calm 688 00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:52,480 and at peace. But if you're like, I have a 689 00:31:52,600 --> 00:31:56,920 public speaking thing coming up or I'm starting a new job or the 690 00:31:56,920 --> 00:31:59,920 first day of school or a final exam, like these big things 691 00:31:59,920 --> 00:32:02,480 where you're like, I think this situation is going to cause me 692 00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:04,480 anxiety. This is when we do a cope ahead. 693 00:32:04,720 --> 00:32:07,640 And so basically what you do is you write out The Who, what, 694 00:32:07,640 --> 00:32:09,960 when, where, and then you talk about how you're going to cope 695 00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:12,480 with it. So like I have a final exam On 696 00:32:12,480 --> 00:32:16,640 this date in this classroom, I am going to feel anxious because 697 00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:18,360 I'm really worried about my grade in this class and how I'm 698 00:32:18,360 --> 00:32:20,960 going to do on this test. And whenever I take test, I just 699 00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:23,240 get really anxious. Like my mind goes blank, like my 700 00:32:23,240 --> 00:32:25,520 heart goes really quickly. I can't catch my breath 701 00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:27,360 somewhere. They feel nauseous, my stomach 702 00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:29,280 is hurting. Like what are you expecting to 703 00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:31,560 feel in this situation? Who's going to be around you? 704 00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:33,280 You're like, there's so many people in this class. 705 00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:35,000 Everyone else is writing and seems like there's someone on 706 00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:36,680 top of it. And my mind is just link and I'm 707 00:32:36,680 --> 00:32:38,960 distressed and the teachers in the front staring at everyone 708 00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:41,320 and the timers going off like get really detailed about what's 709 00:32:41,320 --> 00:32:44,000 happening. And then a really key part of 710 00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:47,480 the cope ahead and you can do this for a realistic situation. 711 00:32:47,480 --> 00:32:49,680 And then a non realistic situation is like, what is the 712 00:32:49,680 --> 00:32:51,240 worst thing that is going to happen? 713 00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:53,800 And this is really great, especially for social anxieties. 714 00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:56,920 Say you're like, I'm walking into the first day of class next 715 00:32:56,920 --> 00:33:00,000 semester with new people I've never met before, and I fell on 716 00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,080 the floor and get a giant black eye. 717 00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:03,360 Like maybe that's the worst thing. 718 00:33:03,360 --> 00:33:05,680 That or you just faint and then you wake up and everyone's 719 00:33:05,680 --> 00:33:07,920 staring at you. How would you cope with that? 720 00:33:08,120 --> 00:33:09,600 Would you do some deep breathing? 721 00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:12,680 Would you be like, I'm sorry, I'm going to the nurse now. 722 00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:16,680 Would you pay attention to your heartbeat, take a try and ground 723 00:33:16,680 --> 00:33:18,280 yourself? Would you look around the room 724 00:33:18,280 --> 00:33:21,240 and five things you can see, 4 things you can hear, three 725 00:33:21,240 --> 00:33:24,560 things you can touch, two things you can smell, one thing you can 726 00:33:24,560 --> 00:33:26,120 taste, like grounding your senses. 727 00:33:26,120 --> 00:33:28,080 How would you cope with that situation? 728 00:33:28,080 --> 00:33:30,360 Because you would cope with it and you can cope with it. 729 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,560 And then once you've done that, cope ahead for the worst 730 00:33:32,560 --> 00:33:35,480 possible situation, you then can go bad for like, OK, 731 00:33:35,480 --> 00:33:38,040 realistically checking the facts, what is likely to happen. 732 00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:40,960 And so you want to be really specific with what skills you're 733 00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:43,280 going to use. Imagine yourself going through 734 00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:44,760 the situation and coping with it. 735 00:33:45,040 --> 00:33:47,440 Like I'm sitting down. I'm going to get out my water, 736 00:33:47,440 --> 00:33:49,680 I'm going to get out my pencil and I'm going to start doing 737 00:33:49,680 --> 00:33:51,040 deep breathing as soon as I get there. 738 00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:52,920 And I'm going to get there 10 minutes early so I can feel 739 00:33:52,920 --> 00:33:55,480 really grounded and ready before this test. 740 00:33:55,840 --> 00:33:58,080 And I'm going to go to my teacher's office hours before 741 00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:00,120 and say, hey, I get a lot of test anxiety. 742 00:34:00,120 --> 00:34:02,600 I know that maybe you might not be able to offer accommodations, 743 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:03,920 but I'm going to get there early. 744 00:34:03,920 --> 00:34:05,040 I'm going to sit in the front row. 745 00:34:05,040 --> 00:34:07,840 I just want you to be aware that like if it's OK with your 746 00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:09,960 testing policy, like I might need to go to the bathroom or 747 00:34:09,960 --> 00:34:11,800 get some water. This is just something that I 748 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:14,679 expect to bring a lot of anxiety and I want to keep you in the 749 00:34:14,679 --> 00:34:17,320 loop as much as possible. So what is everything you're 750 00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:21,639 going to do to navigate the situation and cope with it and 751 00:34:21,639 --> 00:34:23,239 mentally go through that process? 752 00:34:23,679 --> 00:34:25,960 And then if it's helpful for you day of, maybe like write down, 753 00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:29,040 OK, if I feel anxious, I'm going to do my deep breathing, I'm 754 00:34:29,040 --> 00:34:31,239 going to do the five things around me and I'm going to count 755 00:34:31,239 --> 00:34:33,800 backwards from 100. Like what are those skills that 756 00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:36,719 you're absolutely going to use? If I'm having a panic attack, 757 00:34:36,760 --> 00:34:39,000 I'm going to ask Ralph and go to the teacher and say I need to 758 00:34:39,000 --> 00:34:40,600 step out and use the restroom for a minute. 759 00:34:41,000 --> 00:34:43,520 So that's Copahead. We love copahead and I do think 760 00:34:43,520 --> 00:34:46,880 an important part of copahead is checking the facts, like is this 761 00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:49,280 realistically going to happen? Are you going to pass out? 762 00:34:49,840 --> 00:34:51,320 Probably not. Is it possible? 763 00:34:51,320 --> 00:34:52,880 Yeah. Why not do the cope ahead for 764 00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:55,159 that? But like, realistically, not 765 00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:56,880 super likely. Even in Princess Tyree, she 766 00:34:56,880 --> 00:34:58,720 doesn't pass out. She just runs out of the room. 767 00:34:59,240 --> 00:35:02,240 She doesn't actually throw up, presumably, and she copes with 768 00:35:02,240 --> 00:35:03,600 it. She survives it, and then she 769 00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:06,560 becomes Princess of Genovia. Building mastery. 770 00:35:06,560 --> 00:35:09,280 This is another DBT skill that kind of has some crossover with 771 00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:11,160 CBT. We talked about exposure 772 00:35:11,160 --> 00:35:14,240 therapy, building mastery over your coping skills and getting 773 00:35:14,240 --> 00:35:16,000 really good at like, I feel anxious. 774 00:35:16,040 --> 00:35:19,440 I'm going to do deep breathing. That is going to help you a lot. 775 00:35:19,480 --> 00:35:23,160 And so anytime you view a little bit of anxiety, use those coping 776 00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:24,840 skills. Practice those coping skills. 777 00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:28,160 And with time, you will get better at building mastery, not 778 00:35:28,160 --> 00:35:30,600 only with your ability to implement those skills and know 779 00:35:30,600 --> 00:35:33,240 when you need them and how to execute them, but also building 780 00:35:33,240 --> 00:35:36,920 mastery over the feeling itself and becoming less anxious and 781 00:35:36,920 --> 00:35:40,280 less responsive to these things that in the past brought you a 782 00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:43,200 lot of distress. And then the play skill. 783 00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:46,480 This is arguably the most important thing for anxiety. 784 00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,920 There's a lot of things that can make your anxiety worse, and I 785 00:35:49,920 --> 00:35:52,400 know you probably hear this all the time, but it's really 786 00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:54,040 important. So we're going to talk about it. 787 00:35:54,440 --> 00:35:57,440 The police scale in DBT is kind of talking about our emotional 788 00:35:57,440 --> 00:35:59,160 vulnerabilities. So it stands for a physical 789 00:35:59,160 --> 00:36:01,680 illness, eating balanced, avoiding mood altering 790 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:05,360 substances, sleeping enough, and exercising balanced. 791 00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:08,600 And so it's taking care of our physical health so that we can 792 00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:11,160 reduce our emotional vulnerability for our mental 793 00:36:11,160 --> 00:36:13,040 health. So emotional vulnerabilities 794 00:36:13,040 --> 00:36:15,880 basically, like at your baseline, how reactive are you 795 00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:19,040 to various stimuli? You get enough sleep if you have 796 00:36:19,040 --> 00:36:22,200 eaten well, if you haven't had caffeine, if you were able to 797 00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:25,240 get out on a walk and get some movement in, if you're not sick, 798 00:36:25,760 --> 00:36:29,720 how susceptible are you to feeling anxious versus you slept 799 00:36:29,720 --> 00:36:32,280 for two hours last night, you had three celsiuses. 800 00:36:32,280 --> 00:36:33,520 Don't do that. That's really bad. 801 00:36:33,520 --> 00:36:35,160 I've never done that. But don't, don't drink 3 802 00:36:35,160 --> 00:36:37,200 celsiuses. I think that's against the FDA 803 00:36:37,200 --> 00:36:41,640 guidelines You have any in yet today you have not done any 804 00:36:41,640 --> 00:36:45,320 exercise whatsoever and you're like heart rates going crazy. 805 00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:47,760 If you have 3 Celsiuses, maybe see a doctor. 806 00:36:47,800 --> 00:36:49,840 You can't catch your breath, your thoughts are spiraling, 807 00:36:49,840 --> 00:36:51,400 you're exhausted, so you're sleep drive. 808 00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:54,320 Like all these things make us a lot more reactive and a lot more 809 00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:56,440 anxious and our baseline is just so out of whack. 810 00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:58,800 And so taking care of these things is really, really 811 00:36:58,800 --> 00:37:01,160 important. Sleep especially, there's so 812 00:37:01,160 --> 00:37:04,160 many like I want to do an episode for you guys about sleep 813 00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:05,960 and how it impacts all these different things. 814 00:37:05,960 --> 00:37:08,680 But one of the purposes of sleep is just like an inside out. 815 00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:11,280 We process through each emotion. We process them through our 816 00:37:11,280 --> 00:37:12,720 dreams. That's one of the reasons 817 00:37:12,760 --> 00:37:15,080 psychologists think that we dream is like process through 818 00:37:15,080 --> 00:37:17,040 these unresolved emotions. We catalogue them. 819 00:37:17,040 --> 00:37:19,960 They go back in the memory ball chamber, whatever the heck it's 820 00:37:19,960 --> 00:37:22,320 called. An inside out sleep plays a very 821 00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:26,520 important role there and but we feel more anxious when we don't 822 00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:29,840 get REM sleep for that reason. There's also the physical aspect 823 00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:33,040 or heart rate variability and how much our heart rate is 824 00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:36,040 increasing and decreasing in response to things connected to 825 00:37:36,040 --> 00:37:38,960 how much sleep we get. And so it's absolutely pivotal, 826 00:37:38,960 --> 00:37:41,320 especially if you do have those intense physical anxiety 827 00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:44,200 symptoms that can be really debilitating, avoiding mood 828 00:37:44,200 --> 00:37:46,680 altering substances. We have to touch on this from 829 00:37:46,680 --> 00:37:48,720 the caffeine lens. I know you guys probably hear 830 00:37:48,720 --> 00:37:50,560 it, but it really does have such a difference. 831 00:37:50,840 --> 00:37:52,720 When I was in middle school, I went through this phase of 832 00:37:52,720 --> 00:37:55,040 drinking a lot of coffee. Like I'd wake up and make a hot 833 00:37:55,040 --> 00:37:57,640 coffee and drink a large amount of caffeine because I was not 834 00:37:57,640 --> 00:37:59,360 sleeping at all. It was really ineffective. 835 00:37:59,680 --> 00:38:02,320 It made my mental health exponentially worse. 836 00:38:02,720 --> 00:38:05,240 And that was one of the reasons I saw such a shift in my first 837 00:38:05,240 --> 00:38:08,200 couple weeks in McLean because I started getting actual sleep and 838 00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:13,200 it was like, wow, I am no longer astronomically depressed and 839 00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:14,920 anxious the moment I open my eyes. 840 00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:18,320 And then even when I was getting sleep, whenever I would drink 841 00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:21,120 coffee, my heart rate, my breathing rate, just the way 842 00:38:21,120 --> 00:38:23,480 that I was thinking and interacting with the world was 843 00:38:23,480 --> 00:38:26,040 overwhelming. I didn't have caffeine for years 844 00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:29,120 after that initial experience, like having too much caffeine 845 00:38:29,120 --> 00:38:31,760 and being so anxious after I was aware, like KK, what I'm 846 00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:35,120 experiencing is anxiety. And this is a really tough thing 847 00:38:35,120 --> 00:38:37,880 to navigate. I did not have coffee or 848 00:38:37,880 --> 00:38:40,560 caffeine for years. And so if you are someone who 849 00:38:40,560 --> 00:38:44,880 has a really anxious baseline, being aware of how caffeine 850 00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:47,560 interacts with your body is really, really important and 851 00:38:47,560 --> 00:38:50,000 really, really helpful. O being really aware of 852 00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:52,480 substances, how they impact your mood, especially if you have 853 00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,960 anxiety. Because across the board, these 854 00:38:55,960 --> 00:38:58,240 changes that we make with our physical health have a really, 855 00:38:58,240 --> 00:39:00,360 really big impact on our mental health as well. 856 00:39:00,720 --> 00:39:02,800 The last part of the please scale that we're going to talk 857 00:39:02,800 --> 00:39:05,080 about is movement. And this varies from person to 858 00:39:05,080 --> 00:39:06,640 person. I think also if you're 859 00:39:06,640 --> 00:39:09,800 navigating depression or depressive symptoms and anxiety, 860 00:39:09,840 --> 00:39:11,960 it can be a whole complex relationship, but movement is 861 00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:15,200 really, really effective for moving anxiety through the body, 862 00:39:15,200 --> 00:39:17,440 having that physical release because we hold a lot of tension 863 00:39:17,440 --> 00:39:19,200 and energy. I know everyone in their mother 864 00:39:19,200 --> 00:39:20,680 has been like, have you tried exercising? 865 00:39:20,680 --> 00:39:22,680 Have you tried moving? It'll help your mental health. 866 00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,680 But this semester, especially dealing with the stress of grad 867 00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:27,880 apps and all these things, I have never walked more in my 868 00:39:27,880 --> 00:39:29,240 life. Like I'm not running, I'm not 869 00:39:29,240 --> 00:39:30,880 lifting. I'm just walking myself around, 870 00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:33,520 put on my headphones. I blast my Taylor Swift and 871 00:39:33,520 --> 00:39:35,880 Gracie Abrams and Sabrina Carpenter because that's all I 872 00:39:35,880 --> 00:39:38,840 listen to. And I walk myself in laps around 873 00:39:38,840 --> 00:39:41,640 campus like I am a suburban dog. And it works great. 874 00:39:41,640 --> 00:39:44,000 It helps me sleep better. It helps me feel like I've 875 00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:45,520 worked through some of that anxiety. 876 00:39:45,800 --> 00:39:48,800 After it, my heart rate's lower. I'm feeling calmer. 877 00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:50,480 Like there were certain days of semester where I was like, I 878 00:39:50,480 --> 00:39:52,000 need my walk or I'd go in the morning. 879 00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:54,360 I'd beg this has to be an afternoon activity so I can 880 00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:57,120 work, work through some of the anxiety I've built up figuring 881 00:39:57,120 --> 00:40:00,240 out what kind of movement works for you and for me. 882 00:40:00,240 --> 00:40:03,040 I want to enjoy it. If I'm jogging, even though it's 883 00:40:03,040 --> 00:40:05,480 probably at a similar speed to what I'm walking, I don't enjoy 884 00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:07,680 it. I'm not happy if I'm walking and 885 00:40:07,680 --> 00:40:09,040 I'm outdoors and I'm listening to music. 886 00:40:09,040 --> 00:40:10,800 Like that's a positive experience for me. 887 00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:12,840 So I'm getting that benefit of like physically moving through 888 00:40:12,840 --> 00:40:14,840 the anxiety, which there's so much research on it being 889 00:40:14,840 --> 00:40:17,760 effective. And I'm also getting the 890 00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:20,240 positive benefits of just, I saw the pretty views, I listen to my 891 00:40:20,240 --> 00:40:23,000 music, I walked around, I feel productive. 892 00:40:23,240 --> 00:40:24,520 So figure out what kind of movement. 893 00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:27,000 You like, maybe it's cycling, maybe it's walking, maybe you 894 00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,440 like running, maybe it's weights, maybe it's Pilates 895 00:40:29,440 --> 00:40:31,440 chance, I don't know. Whatever it is that you enjoy, 896 00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:34,520 adding movement to your routine can really help to work through 897 00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:37,120 anxiety, but also from a preventative perspective of 898 00:40:37,200 --> 00:40:39,880 keeping that baseline low and effective. 899 00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:43,840 Those are long term skills I like to pull from and I use on a 900 00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:47,160 daily, weekly, monthly basis. And then the short term skills. 901 00:40:47,160 --> 00:40:49,280 So these are things you use when you're feeling really anxious, 902 00:40:49,520 --> 00:40:50,920 when you're having a panic attack. 903 00:40:51,160 --> 00:40:54,440 And the key short term skills or distress tolerance if you want 904 00:40:54,440 --> 00:40:57,360 to go from the DBT perspective, is that we use them to tolerate 905 00:40:57,360 --> 00:40:59,240 distress. We can't use them to cope with 906 00:40:59,240 --> 00:41:02,320 things long term because they lose their effectiveness. 907 00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:04,320 So we use these when we're feeling really, really anxious. 908 00:41:04,320 --> 00:41:07,040 And then we lean on those longer term skills of like lifestyle 909 00:41:07,040 --> 00:41:10,880 changes, asking for help, doing exposure therapy, coping ahead, 910 00:41:10,880 --> 00:41:12,600 building mastery over that anxiety. 911 00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:14,880 So if you're having a panic attack, these are the skills 912 00:41:14,880 --> 00:41:16,800 that I would recommend. The first one is STOP. 913 00:41:17,160 --> 00:41:19,480 It's an acronym from DBT that stands for STOP. 914 00:41:19,840 --> 00:41:22,440 Take a step back, Observe, and proceed mindfully. 915 00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:25,560 This seems so intuitive, but when you're having a panic 916 00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:29,440 attack and you can't breathe, it's not so stop physically, 917 00:41:29,440 --> 00:41:33,080 mentally, just freeze. Take a step back if you can, 918 00:41:33,080 --> 00:41:34,640 take yourself out of the situation. 919 00:41:34,920 --> 00:41:38,920 Walk outside, leave the conversation, get out of the 920 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:42,240 room that you're in. Observe mentally and physically. 921 00:41:42,240 --> 00:41:44,360 OK, what happened? Symptom check. 922 00:41:44,360 --> 00:41:46,000 Is my heart rate going really fast? 923 00:41:46,000 --> 00:41:47,800 Is my breathing rate really intense? 924 00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:50,360 Are my thoughts spiraling? Where am I? 925 00:41:50,360 --> 00:41:53,520 What caused this? Observe kind of how we got in 926 00:41:53,520 --> 00:41:55,760 this position. And then you make your plan to 927 00:41:55,760 --> 00:41:58,040 proceed mindfully. And the proceeding mindfully a 928 00:41:58,040 --> 00:42:00,640 lot of the time is using coping skills, which we'll talk about 929 00:42:00,880 --> 00:42:03,760 here in a second. But we often skip that step. 930 00:42:03,760 --> 00:42:06,400 Like we just run into deep breathing or like, Oh my God, I 931 00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:07,880 need to drink water. Oh my God, I'm anxious. 932 00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:11,480 I better walk around taking that step to be like, OK, what is 933 00:42:11,480 --> 00:42:13,280 truly happening physically and mentally? 934 00:42:13,480 --> 00:42:17,160 What am I anxious about and how did I get to this point of 935 00:42:17,160 --> 00:42:19,640 feeling so distressed and overwhelmed? 936 00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:23,200 The TIP skills, the next one you guys know I love the TIP skill. 937 00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:25,920 This should be common knowledge. It's just it's such a game 938 00:42:25,920 --> 00:42:29,160 changer and it works 100% of the time, which is hard to say for 939 00:42:29,160 --> 00:42:32,800 mental health things. So TIP is an acronym in DBT and 940 00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:35,720 it stands for Temperature, Intense exercise, pace, 941 00:42:35,720 --> 00:42:37,560 Breathing, and paired Muscle relaxation. 942 00:42:37,560 --> 00:42:41,600 So temperature, this pulls from a biological phenomenon called 943 00:42:41,600 --> 00:42:44,880 the mammalian diving reflex, which is stimulated by your 944 00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:47,120 vagus nerve. I might get this wrong because I 945 00:42:47,120 --> 00:42:49,840 am not a biologist, but your vagus nerve runs underneath your 946 00:42:49,840 --> 00:42:51,480 eyes. I believe it goes down your 947 00:42:51,480 --> 00:42:54,000 neck, your chest, and then it like ends kind of in your 948 00:42:54,000 --> 00:42:56,080 stomach near your kidneys, liver area. 949 00:42:56,320 --> 00:42:58,960 And your body has this thing called your mammalian diving 950 00:42:58,960 --> 00:43:00,360 reflex. And so when you come into 951 00:43:00,360 --> 00:43:03,200 contact with cold butter, your body's like OK, I'm going to go 952 00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:04,480 swimming now. I'm going to need to be 953 00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:07,920 underwater, and so if I keep my heart rate at a high level, I'm 954 00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:10,920 going to produce a lot of carbon dioxide really quickly. 955 00:43:11,240 --> 00:43:14,080 And I'm going to have to get up to the surface really quickly to 956 00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:17,000 release that carbon dioxide and get more oxygen so that I can 957 00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:18,720 survive. And that's not efficient or 958 00:43:18,720 --> 00:43:20,440 effective. So your body has a system in 959 00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:22,720 place where when cold water comes into contact with your 960 00:43:22,720 --> 00:43:26,120 vagus nerve, your body immediately lowers your heart 961 00:43:26,120 --> 00:43:28,360 rate and lowers your breathing rate so that you're not 962 00:43:28,360 --> 00:43:31,040 producing carbon dioxide as quickly and you don't need more 963 00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:33,800 oxygen while you're quote UN quote underwater. 964 00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:36,120 And so we can hack this, we can use it to our advantage. 965 00:43:36,480 --> 00:43:38,480 And so when we're having a panic attack, you're going to get a 966 00:43:38,480 --> 00:43:41,520 bowl of ice water, or you can use an ice pack, or you can just 967 00:43:41,520 --> 00:43:44,200 use cool water if you're in a situation where you can't access 968 00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:46,520 a bowl of ice water, but a bowl of ice water will be most 969 00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:48,160 effective. This is what we used in 970 00:43:48,160 --> 00:43:51,000 residential. They have like so many ice cubes 971 00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:53,720 and so many bowls of water and towels because they use them 972 00:43:53,720 --> 00:43:56,560 almost on a daily basis to help people get through anxiety. 973 00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:59,880 You fill up your bowl of water, you've put your ice in it, you 974 00:43:59,880 --> 00:44:01,880 take a deep breath and you submerge your face. 975 00:44:02,200 --> 00:44:05,000 You count for maybe like 10 seconds, however long you need 976 00:44:05,400 --> 00:44:07,800 before you take another breath, and then you submerge your face 977 00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:09,360 again. You'll probably repeat that four 978 00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:13,360 or five times until you're no longer breathing really quickly 979 00:44:13,360 --> 00:44:16,600 with a really fast heart rate, and that physiological distress 980 00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:19,640 will go away 100% of the time. You might have to repeat it a 981 00:44:19,640 --> 00:44:21,040 few times. You might have to do a few 982 00:44:21,040 --> 00:44:24,600 cycles, but it will work. That physiological distress will 983 00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:27,960 lessen because we're using this biological mechanism that is 984 00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,080 foolproof. You might have seen this on 985 00:44:30,080 --> 00:44:32,000 TikTok. People will be like lowering my 986 00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:35,400 cortisol after my hangover and then they'll do an ice dive. 987 00:44:35,800 --> 00:44:37,920 But it works for mental health, for anxiety. 988 00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:40,200 I wish everyone knew this. And if you're ever around 989 00:44:40,200 --> 00:44:42,440 someone having a panic attack, this is a skill you can offer 990 00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:44,720 them that will work 100% of the time. 991 00:44:45,480 --> 00:44:48,640 The rest of the tip skill is intense exercise, pace, 992 00:44:48,640 --> 00:44:50,280 breathing, impaired muscle relaxation. 993 00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:54,440 So intense exercise is a similar idea that when we are 994 00:44:54,440 --> 00:44:57,760 exercising, our body can only maintain a certain level of 995 00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:00,560 outputs for so long. So if we're sprinting and we 996 00:45:00,560 --> 00:45:04,000 stop sprinting, our bodies like I'm no longer moving, I'm 997 00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:07,120 lowering my heart rate and my breathing rate to conserve 998 00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:09,400 energy. Basically all our bodies ever 999 00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:12,160 want to do is conserve energy. They don't want to be having a 1000 00:45:12,160 --> 00:45:15,960 lot of output or moving. So anytime in any place we can 1001 00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:18,760 conserve energy, we will. And one of the ways is by 1002 00:45:18,760 --> 00:45:20,840 exercising and then stopping exercising. 1003 00:45:21,160 --> 00:45:23,320 So when your heart rates going really fast, when you can't 1004 00:45:23,320 --> 00:45:26,000 catch your breath because you're having a panic attack, do 1005 00:45:26,040 --> 00:45:29,880 sprints, do a bunch of squats, do burpees, do something really 1006 00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:33,240 high intensity, run in place, do jumping jacks. 1007 00:45:33,480 --> 00:45:36,240 Your heart rate will get raised past the level that it was at 1008 00:45:36,240 --> 00:45:40,200 from that anxiety and then your body will lower it below that 1009 00:45:40,200 --> 00:45:43,200 threshold and again alleviate that physiological distress. 1010 00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:45,840 It also again, helps move that anxiety through the body, which 1011 00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:48,600 is also very helpful. And you release endorphins 1012 00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:49,920 because you're doing some exercise. 1013 00:45:49,920 --> 00:45:53,040 So added benefit. And then paired muscle 1014 00:45:53,040 --> 00:45:56,440 relaxation and pace, breathing. Pretty intuitive, but basically 1015 00:45:56,680 --> 00:45:58,840 we carry a lot of stress in our body. 1016 00:45:58,840 --> 00:46:01,800 Our muscles get really tense and tight when we're anxious. 1017 00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:05,360 And so this works really well in tandem, but you're going to 1018 00:46:05,360 --> 00:46:08,040 breathe in. As you breathe in, you clench 1019 00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:10,600 your muscles, pause with your muscles clenched. 1020 00:46:10,600 --> 00:46:13,360 And then as you breathe out, you release the clenched muscles. 1021 00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:14,720 You could do this one muscle at a time. 1022 00:46:14,720 --> 00:46:17,800 So like starting with your fist, then your whole arm move around 1023 00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,680 your body more of like a flashlight meditation situation. 1024 00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:22,680 Or you can just like your whole body, breathe in, tense your 1025 00:46:22,680 --> 00:46:25,840 muscles release them, and again you're tensing them past the 1026 00:46:25,840 --> 00:46:28,400 threshold that they were tensed from the anxiety and releasing 1027 00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:31,280 it again below that threshold. So you let go of that tension 1028 00:46:31,720 --> 00:46:34,480 and then the key with pace breathing, you could do whatever 1029 00:46:34,480 --> 00:46:37,560 count works for you. For me, normally I do 2 slower 1030 00:46:37,560 --> 00:46:40,920 counts in pause and then three outs and people like to do 3 1031 00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:43,800 counts in, four out. The key is that your exhale 1032 00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:47,200 needs to be longer than your inhale and that will also lower 1033 00:46:47,200 --> 00:46:49,600 your heart rate, lower your breathing rate, and doing that 1034 00:46:49,600 --> 00:46:51,320 for a few minutes is really helpful. 1035 00:46:52,000 --> 00:46:54,360 And then the last thing that I'll mention, and this is the 1036 00:46:54,360 --> 00:46:58,160 last one because again, it loses its effectiveness, but distract. 1037 00:46:58,240 --> 00:47:01,200 If you're having a panic attack, if you're really anxious, have 1038 00:47:01,200 --> 00:47:03,440 your list of distraction skills that works really well. 1039 00:47:03,440 --> 00:47:05,000 Is it watching your favorite TV show? 1040 00:47:05,000 --> 00:47:08,160 Is it blasting music? Is it doing a workout? 1041 00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:12,200 Is it coloring, drawing? Like what is it that distracts 1042 00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:14,640 you from your emotional experiences that you can lean on 1043 00:47:14,640 --> 00:47:17,360 in the short term to survive through that crisis? 1044 00:47:17,400 --> 00:47:18,920 Again, these are crisis survival skills. 1045 00:47:18,920 --> 00:47:21,640 We don't use these on a daily basis because they lose their 1046 00:47:21,640 --> 00:47:23,280 effective activeness and it's a crutch. 1047 00:47:23,600 --> 00:47:26,560 But in those moments where you are really, really anxious, it's 1048 00:47:26,560 --> 00:47:31,480 really helpful to have a list on your phone or a photo or no. 1049 00:47:31,480 --> 00:47:33,600 Like if I feel anxious, I listen to music. 1050 00:47:33,640 --> 00:47:38,240 If I feel anxious, I bake, I pet my dog, I go on a walk. 1051 00:47:38,240 --> 00:47:41,800 What is that answer for you? And lean on distraction in the 1052 00:47:41,800 --> 00:47:44,800 short term. So those are our distress 1053 00:47:44,800 --> 00:47:46,720 tolerant skills. The last thing we're going to 1054 00:47:46,720 --> 00:47:48,520 talk about in this episode of Things I Wish I Knew about 1055 00:47:48,520 --> 00:47:50,320 anxiety is that anxiety can be good. 1056 00:47:50,320 --> 00:47:53,520 It serves a purpose and actually benefits us in some situation. 1057 00:47:53,560 --> 00:47:55,800 Again, this is the difference between we get anxious, we feel 1058 00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:58,720 anxiety and like generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety 1059 00:47:58,720 --> 00:48:01,480 disorder, where it's causing us to stress and interfering with 1060 00:48:01,480 --> 00:48:03,640 our quality of life. But anxiety is a feeling can be 1061 00:48:03,640 --> 00:48:07,280 good and it can serve a purpose. We talked about how anxiety is 1062 00:48:07,320 --> 00:48:09,320 sending us messages about potential threats. 1063 00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:12,520 And a lot of the times it's like we don't want to be rejected. 1064 00:48:12,520 --> 00:48:14,440 We care about these people. We care about love and 1065 00:48:14,440 --> 00:48:16,000 acceptance and feeling supported. 1066 00:48:16,360 --> 00:48:18,360 We're worried we're going to lose something that matters to 1067 00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:21,880 us, that person, that thing, that acceptance, that matters to 1068 00:48:21,920 --> 00:48:23,680 us. We care about that, that is of 1069 00:48:23,680 --> 00:48:26,080 value. So it's good and sending us 1070 00:48:26,080 --> 00:48:28,440 those messages. There's also this really 1071 00:48:28,440 --> 00:48:31,080 interesting thing in psychology called the Yorks Dodson Law. 1072 00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:34,000 If you've taken intra psych, you've probably realized that. 1073 00:48:34,240 --> 00:48:37,560 But if you're completely calm, like you're a Buddha, you're 1074 00:48:37,560 --> 00:48:41,360 meditating, there is no anxiety in any bone of your body. 1075 00:48:41,360 --> 00:48:44,440 People don't perform very well. Similarly, on the other side of 1076 00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:47,120 the spectrum, if you're having a full blown panic attack, you 1077 00:48:47,120 --> 00:48:49,920 don't perform very well and performance, I mean like mental 1078 00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:51,400 activity. So taking a test. 1079 00:48:51,400 --> 00:48:54,800 So if you take a test completely calm, you don't do great. 1080 00:48:54,840 --> 00:48:58,040 If you take a test having a full blown anxiety attack, you don't 1081 00:48:58,040 --> 00:49:02,520 do great, but somewhere in that middle range, it's like a bell 1082 00:49:02,520 --> 00:49:04,680 curve. When you have a medium amount of 1083 00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:08,600 anxiety, you are using those physical symptoms that we talked 1084 00:49:08,600 --> 00:49:11,600 about, increased attention, increased awareness, better 1085 00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,960 eyesight, better hearing, more awareness. 1086 00:49:14,320 --> 00:49:16,440 There's something riding on that you care about. 1087 00:49:16,440 --> 00:49:18,520 And so we actually perform better mentally when we're a 1088 00:49:18,520 --> 00:49:21,440 little bit anxious. Anxiety helps us perform at our 1089 00:49:21,440 --> 00:49:23,760 best. And so it can be good and small 1090 00:49:23,760 --> 00:49:26,000 doses. And then we talked about this in 1091 00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:27,480 another episode, in this episode. 1092 00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:30,040 So he talked about how procrastination is like natural 1093 00:49:30,040 --> 00:49:32,440 Adderall. That's a really clickbaity over 1094 00:49:32,440 --> 00:49:34,960 generalization. But when we procrastinate 1095 00:49:34,960 --> 00:49:37,840 things, we have this boost of anxiety before the deadline. 1096 00:49:38,040 --> 00:49:40,880 And then we work faster, we work more efficiently because now 1097 00:49:40,880 --> 00:49:43,040 it's like, OK, adrenaline, I need to get this done. 1098 00:49:43,040 --> 00:49:44,400 There's this deadline. This is a threat. 1099 00:49:44,400 --> 00:49:47,000 Like I got to work through this. And so this is another way that 1100 00:49:47,000 --> 00:49:49,520 anxiety shows up. It gets us motivated, it gets us 1101 00:49:49,520 --> 00:49:52,800 to act, it gets us to behave. It causes that adrenaline to be 1102 00:49:52,800 --> 00:49:54,960 able to get us to get things done. 1103 00:49:54,960 --> 00:49:57,800 So anxiety can be good. It just serve a purpose, but 1104 00:49:57,800 --> 00:50:00,720 when it's causing us to stress and it's causing us to avoid and 1105 00:50:00,720 --> 00:50:03,360 it's interfering with our quality of life, we got to work 1106 00:50:03,360 --> 00:50:04,960 through that. We got to be more effective and 1107 00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:08,120 hopefully everything I talked about today will help you do 1108 00:50:08,120 --> 00:50:10,160 that. So those are some things I wish 1109 00:50:10,160 --> 00:50:12,560 I knew about anxiety. If you have something you wish 1110 00:50:12,560 --> 00:50:14,720 you knew about anxiety, let me know. 1111 00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:17,680 Send me an e-mail or an Instagram DM or tag me on 1112 00:50:17,680 --> 00:50:21,120 Instagram stories, any of the things I'm always here and make 1113 00:50:21,120 --> 00:50:23,160 sure to share this episode if it was helpful. 1114 00:50:23,160 --> 00:50:25,720 I really hope it was and I'm glad we're back to the solos. 1115 00:50:25,720 --> 00:50:28,720 I love these and it's just been so busy, but I miss talking to 1116 00:50:28,720 --> 00:50:30,280 you guys. So we're going to do more of 1117 00:50:30,280 --> 00:50:31,760 these. I'm also going to do a things I 1118 00:50:31,760 --> 00:50:34,400 wish I knew about depression, so get excited for that episode. 1119 00:50:34,840 --> 00:50:38,280 Really happy topic. No, it'll be good. 1120 00:50:38,560 --> 00:50:40,960 But yeah, I hope you guys are having a good semester. 1121 00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:43,040 This is going to come out before Thanksgiving, so happy 1122 00:50:43,040 --> 00:50:45,600 Thanksgiving. I'm thankful for all of you. 1123 00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:49,680 You guys are the best. I love you loads and leave a 1124 00:50:49,680 --> 00:50:52,960 review, share all the things. I hope you're not experiencing 1125 00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:55,680 too much anxiety and if you are experiencing anxiety, hopefully 1126 00:50:55,680 --> 00:50:56,720 now you know how to cope with it. 1127 00:50:56,720 --> 00:50:58,360 So have a great rest of your week. 1128 00:50:58,440 --> 00:51:02,520 I loved and missed you guys, so with that, I'll see you next 1129 00:51:02,520 --> 00:51:02,760 week.