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Happy Monday and welcome to your
mental Health Mini. 

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This week's guest is Doctor 
Justin Pooter and we are talking

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all about therapy. 
What is your advice to teens 

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that are entering or beginning 
therapy? 

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What is your advice to both 
parents and teens in that 

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situation? 
It's such a great question. 

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This is important. 
I would want you to be able to 

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pause and ask yourself, what do 
I want? 

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What gets confounded for a lot 
of the teens is what your mom 

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wants for you. 
What your dad's telling you need

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to change. 
What your teachers are telling 

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you at school needs to be 
different. 

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It's different when you can kind
of pull back from that and say, 

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but what is it that I'm sitting 
with that I would want to be 

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different. 
And sometimes it's different. 

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Things come out. 
Some people be like, I would 

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like to be in a relationship. 
That's not what my mom's sending

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me here for. 
That's not why I originally 

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walked through this door. 
But I would like to feel good 

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enough, confident enough that I 
could date somebody and be in a 

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relationship That's different 
because when you go inward and 

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you're like, how could this 
therapy really help me? 

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When you make progress along 
those lines, you really see how 

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therapy can be transformative 
versus when we're changing 

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something for someone else, 
which is the unfortunate burden 

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that gets put on a lot of the 
teens in having the conversation

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of the what would be different? 
What would change? 

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I start to get a feel right away
for how specific of goals people

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have. 
Is it general like I want to 

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build self-confidence and even 
in that you can set specific 

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goals along the way of what 
would it mean? 

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How are you defining 
self-confidence for yourself of 

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like, well, I'd start talking to
people in my classes. 

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That's OK, Yeah. 
So what class are we talking 

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about? 
You know what I mean? 

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Scaling that goal even back of 
is there a specific person? 

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Like is there a way we start to 
build up to you asking someone 

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on a date? 
Because usually there's a lot of

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steps of people feeling 
comfortable in their skin 

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between them. 
But you start to get a feel 

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early on the people being like, 
yeah, I can't, I'm not sleeping.

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And that's really bothering me. 
And then it's what are the 

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reasonable steps and things we 
can get curious about now and 

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the things we can start testing,
which is something I think a lot

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of people in therapy don't quite
understand if they're new to 

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therapy, is you are 
experimenting as much as like, I

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have this education and I can 
know the science and this and 

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that. 
I can't know exactly what's 

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going to work for Sadie. 
I can't. 

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We can get curious, we can test 
things out. 

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We can be like, how about we 
stop scrolling an hour before 

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bed and you might come back 
after a week and be like, it 

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didn't really make a difference.
And then we're going to look at 

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some other things. 
We're like, what about let's 

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look at caffeine intake? 
And you're like, Oh yeah, I tend

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to like having my dunk. 
Crew before bed. 

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I have my cold girl 5. 
What's the big deal? 

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Right? 
But these are the It's the 

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curiosity in therapy and the 
experimentation in your life 

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that leads to change because 
it's not the same for everyone. 

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And I think that's what makes 
therapy so interesting, so 

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unique. 
But understanding that when you 

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go into therapy that there'll be
things you have to test out and 

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you might not know how it's 
going to like, what the 

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outcome's going to be. 
And some might work better or 

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worse for you. 
That is real therapy is the 

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experimentation. 
And so with the parents, this 

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might feel weird for parents. 
Let your teen pick the 

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therapist. 
Trust me on this, let them pick.

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I know you. 
You can even show them 

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psychologytoday.com. 
Just scroll some profiles. 

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If it feels overwhelming for 
them. 

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You could even like, it feels 
like a line up in a way, but you

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could show them, send them 10 
profiles or five if they don't 

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even want to do that work. 
There is. 

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The therapeutic relationship is 
so important with change. 

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It's the number one predictor of
outcomes. 

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So if the parents pick the 
therapist, as soon as the team 

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walks in the room, they take one
look at them and they're like, I

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don't feel comfortable with this
person. 

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We know those factors exist and 
as much as you'd say, well, you 

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get to know them, try it. 
It's different when you empower 

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your team to be like, I'm going 
to let you pick again. 

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I can show you the resources or 
whatever, but let you choose. 

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It is a relationship, meaning 
with most relationships it takes

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time. 
I have to get to know you. 

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I got to know your narrative. 
I got to know the things you 

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like and dislike and and get to 
know your personality. 

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Therapy is the same because 
every person is different. 

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And so the way you implement 
changed and the way you 

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emotionally, cognitively arrive 
in that session, you got to have

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that therapeutic relationship 
for it to be effective. 

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So I, I'd want teens to know 
that the relationship building, 

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it doesn't happen in that first 
like 5055 minute session. 

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It it does take time. 
If you enjoyed this week's 

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mental health mini, you can 
listen to the full episode. 

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It is episode 167 featuring 
Doctor Justin Pooter. 

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A link to the full episode is in
the show notes. 

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As always, make sure to leave a 
review, subscribe, share with a 

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friend or family member, and 
follow along at at Sheep 

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Resisted Podcast. 
Thanks for listening.