Hey, hey, my sparkly friends, it's Carol Jean here and this
episode is a little different. There's no prepare the soil or
water and nourish, no route to practice for you this week.
Just a moment of reflection, real talk, and a hello from one
human navigating life's curve balls to another.
Step out of the shadows. Feel the power of eyes.
Catch the spark inside you. Let your spirit fly beyond the
chronic Corona Carol jeans your guy find your step being real a
nice joy on the tide. So wish forward, bright and
bold. Leave the bird up behind.
In this journey hearts unfold. How is yours seeking find?
So I got stung by a bee last Thursday.
It was really, really scary. I'm allergic and I also have M
cast. So if you've been around for a
bit, you know that. So the usual go to treatments
like epinephrine or steroid pack.
They're just not an option for me because I also have POTS and
it it all of that really just doesn't work with my chemistry.
So I'm left with just a, you know, two options roughly.
And let me tell you, it's been a rough four days.
Today I woke up and I felt a lot better, but holy cow, this has
been brutal. Honestly, yesterday was bad.
Like Sunday I felt better and I was like, oh, good, I'm on the
upswing, right? And then yesterday, oh, Oh my
gosh, yesterday was bad. Like I, I think looking back
over the last couple of days, probably four or five days, I,
two of those days I basically slept the whole time and you
know, oh, that, that's a little frustrating because I'm like one
of those people. I'm like stuff to do and I want
to be out there outside, you know, playing in my plants and
this kind of stuff. But you know what's interesting
is when I was stung, my husband and I were going into town to go
pick up my new blood pressure medicine, right?
And I guess this bee, it was either in the Jeep or maybe I
walking out to the Jeep, but it gotten on my dress.
And when I sat down, we were maybe halfway to the stop sign
from our driveway. All of a sudden I got stung on
the inside of my thigh. Y'all, I got stung like 15 years
ago was the last time I was stung by anything and it was by
some Wasps and same spot. So I'm like, OK, well, of course
the first thing I do in my little woo woo world is I go,
what's the spiritual meaning of a bee sting?
And it's, you know, transformation and, you know,
all these different things. And I'm like, OK, this is
tracking. You know, there's the full moons
coming up on the 11th tomorrow. Well, the day that this podcast
airs and it's a strawberry moon, but it's also this season of
shedding of like purging and getting rid of things.
And so I was like, huh, OK, so I'm going to pay attention to
that. But here's the thing.
Instead of getting completely derailed by this bee sting or
trying to power through or push through, I made a choice to
treat it as an opportunity to deeply care for myself.
That didn't mean like one big decision.
It meant checking in with myself constantly over the last few
days, not just once in the morning.
You know, like oh, how do I feel when I first wake up?
Because by the way, that is never a good barometer
necessarily because I'm always like 5 minutes later I feel
totally different. Not just when things felt hard
throughout the day, but over and over again.
I kept asking myself what do I need right now?
What's changed since, you know, like maybe an hour ago or the
last time I checked in. What does support look like for
me in this moment? Because our needs are fluid,
especially in a body and a nervous system like ours.
If you are also a trifecta patient or you have Co occurring
health conditions. So we had an accelerate circle
office hours today. That's my small group for the
unveiling method and we delve into a beautiful rich
conversation about something. I think every single one of us
needs to practice more listening to the truth underneath our yes,
no and maybe. So we used three questions to
guide our conversation today. The first one was when I feel
the urge to say no, what signals physical, emotional, sensory or
intuitive do I notice in my body or my mind?
Now, we also ended up applying this across the board to like,
well, when I feel the urge to say yes, what signals do I
notice in my body or mind, you know, And if there's a maybe, if
I'm not really sure, how does that feel for me in my body, in
my emotions, right? The second question we dove into
was in moments of uncertainty, how can I pause and ask myself,
is this a true yes, a no? Or maybe it needs more time or
information? I feel like a lot of us, we say
yes to things because we want to people, please, we don't want to
rock the boat. We feel like, oh, it's not that
big a deal. I'll just say yes or oh, that
sounds really fun. If you feel like me and your
audio HD, you're like, oh, that sounds really great.
That's exciting, yes. And then you're like, oh, but
then I've got like all this other stuff on my plate already.
The third question we kind of dove into and really I love how
we took the conversation. What simple language or phrase
feels safe and true to begin expressing a no or even a maybe
while honoring both my needs and my nervous system.
This was one I really had to lean into a lot the last couple
of days, and not with other people so much as more with
myself. I had to find the language to
like pause to check in, to make sure I was honoring my needs and
my nervous system. What unfolded in this
conversation and just sort of in my practice of this and my
exploration, I should say compassionate curiosity, was
this beautiful unraveling of patterns we've all held onto in
those patterns, like people pleasing going along to get
along, conflict avoidance, that nervous system freeze, or fond
response that so many of us, especially autistic women, know
all too well. And here's what really surprised
us. It wasn't just hard to say no to
other people. It was just as hard, if not
harder to notice how often we say yes to things we never even
checked in with ourselves about. Are you feeling that you're not
alone? Like projects we didn't want to
take on to do lists that aren't actually ours.
They might belong to our partner, our boss, our Co
worker, our kids. They're not necessarily ours,
but we took them on task. We're doing out of obligation,
not desire. We realized the real personal
power comes from pausing from actually creating space.
Before the automatic, yes. Before the avoidant?
No. Before the freeze and when we
paused, we got real about what's a hell yes, what's a not now,
and what's something that just doesn't belong to us anymore.
So maybe this episode meets you where you are today, in the
messiness, in the magic, or somewhere in between.
Especially for those of you heading into summer with kiddos
at home and routines flipped upside down.
It might even more. It might even be more important
to pause and check in than you realized.
Say yes when it lights you up and it gives you that hell yes
feeling. Say no when your body says
please not that again, and let the maybes breathe until they
find their answer. You're not alone in this.
The messy middle can also be your magic.
And as always, we're right here walking with you.
Just know that sometimes it's not the maybe.
It's just not now. Sometimes it's just about the
timing. It's like maybe tomorrow
afternoon at 2:00, it'll be a yes or a hell yes.
But right now it's a not now. And you know, that's something
that kids don't always love. My kids did not love it when I
would just say not now. Like, OK, mom, but when?
Well, I don't know when yet, and that's OK because I think that's
part of the conversation that we start to model and really have
with not just our kids, but maybe with ourselves a little
bit more. You know, it's OK to not know,
to have a not now, but to have this feeling like, you know, I
feel like it'll be a yes, but I'm just not sure when that is
yet. But I'll let you know.
So I'll see you next time and take care of that beautiful self
of yours, your sparkly beautiful light.
Just pause anytime throughout the week.
Check the show notes below. I'll have those 3 reflective
questions that we had in our accelerate circle today and just
begin to check in with the why behind your yes, your no, your
maybe or even embracing the not now.
Take care. Thanks for being here.
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