Hey everybody. It's me, Mickey Soros and it's
me. Hey dude.
Were you trying to remind me to start the podcast?
I was going to I was also going to tell you to not eat the
microphone, which is something that audio people say, sometimes
when they say eat the mic. But I was literally putting it
in my box but I wanted to see what it would feel like on my on
my it does it does have that like it's imagine what it would
feel like inside of my mouth. Okay, okay, make your jokes
Folks at home. Make your jokes.
Are you see? No jokes.
That could be made. Would you like to explain it to
me? I don't I don't see any possible
jokes before we get started. I just want to do a little
housekeeping real quick. I'm keeping housekeeping
transformation on the, The Quest Craft Server, which by the way,
I believe in the last episode, we called it the Haven Craft
Server dead immediately afterward Kant.
Retconned it the Quest Craft Server.
Congratulations to those who got in those who applied, who did
not get in is I think personal my friends, we just got way
more, Felicia, Felicia a fucking creeper, is it was insane.
We walked away from the, from a little Google spreadsheet and
then we came back and we went, oh no.
What did we do? Took, like two days to go
through all of them of like non-stop work?
Yeah. Oh yeah.
Like literally we, I was really proud of you.
You are true, like, literally ten hours.
Thanks, but first, I appreciate, just like screening and
everything. Once I learned how to color code
stuff, Unlike the Google Sheets thing, exact kind of fun, you
know, because I do look stunning Excel like weirdly validating.
Oh yeah, somewhere out there. And it's like, hi can show you
the world. I just like these but move my
microphone cable but I'm scared. It's going to make a noise.
You're gonna be fine. It's gonna be great.
You're going to do great. But so yeah, it was nothing
personal. We just couldn't let everybody
like literally, I don't think there exists, a Minecraft server
large enough or like that's could possibly host as many
people as applied. So like there's literally just
Way. And honestly, they were like a
couple people who are like, you know, oh they should definitely
join because they're like a micro streamer.
But then a lot of it was honestly kind of random.
Like after like 20 we were like, well we can let on a, you know,
a good another like 40 people, but all of your applications
were just like so good. Good.
It was literally just like that. Someone was like, okay I guess
I'll let this person because they're like a builder and this
person's a red Stoner. Okay.
But like honestly at some point it was It was kind of just like
a lottery. He liked.
But anyway, so if you didn't get any, it is nothing personal.
You're wonderful, you're great, go start a server.
Clearly there's a lot of demand I think actually are Divergent
Minecraft servers. So if you want to start your own
piggy bank, go to my Discord server.
If you go to the fruit snack Nation Discord server, I think
there are actually people who are doing exactly that.
Oh sweet. There is a lengthy conversation
in the Minecraft Channel earlier this morning about for folks who
didn't have the opportunity. To play on quests craft.
They were talking about starting their own.
So you might want to check over there because I think that is
actually happening. Oh sweet.
Well, that's what the community is.
Just being a community and I love that just off, dude.
I mean so we opened the The Quest Craft Server hasn't
started yet. It looks like it's going to be
Saturday at noon. That looks very probable that
that's going to be the official opening or like there's gonna be
a bunch of crowds of like blocky Minecraft players, you know?
And then I'm going to like do like a little speech and it's
going to be chaos. Awesome.
Like how good it is going to be slightly mitigated chaos, but
that should be when it when it starts.
But I mean just but the Discord to server is now open.
We invited the people were accepted into this Court's
earlier yesterday and just if any of you are members of this
that Discord and just you guys ex, holy shit, I like almost
cried last night in voice chat, just thanking everybody because
they were just having these like deep conversations about like
their lives and their history with no Divergence and stuff.
And then like mixed with just like fun, joking around About
stuff and let you it's just gonna be really good.
I am never ever, not just floored by the wonderfulness of
this community like it just blows my mind.
So just if you'll just thank you.
But anyways, so the discords always been one of my God.
I was going somewhere with that. Just got server has been over
day and so I am Quest. Starts noon.
Everybody's great. Oh, no, I think that's it, cool.
But the, the sun around, which we will be revolving in the
Amber ring too. Today the last couple weeks have
been a lot for Katie and me a lot and a lot of the stuff that
we've been planning and like making lists about in Google
spreadsheets about and doing research about now, it's like
happening, it's like actually happening weirdly scary.
It is terrifying. I'm scared all the time.
I'm absolutely terrified all the time but we're now we're now
hitting that point that I think a lot of ADHD Folks are very
familiar with where now it's like oh, okay.
Now is when the like the work starts, the long haul work.
I said, I think on my stream this morning on my twitching
this morning, I was talking about how we're going to do
Quest crab Seasons. We're going to season one and
then a year later season 2 and you won't let your best season
3. And so I was like saying and as
I was saying the sentence of like that I was like so yeah,
this is what I'm going to be doing for the next couple.
All years in my whole brain was like yeah, whoa and I'm still
like that was the plan. I'm so fucking stoked in
grateful to be able to like to be in a position where I get to
like play Minecraft as part of my job.
What like I'm so lucky for that to be the case but the the time
of it hit me all at once, like holy shit years and so I'm
freaking out but also excited and all the stuff It's a very
familiar sensation. I think with ADHD folks who me I
don't say overcome it because I don't feel like what we're
committed. This was all very intentional.
Yeah but I think this is the first time where I'm having that
feeling but it's not over-committing like my brain is
looking for the overcommit. Iran is looking for like the
what did you say yes to that you shouldn't have but there isn't
one because this is exactly what I want to be doing.
Well you've been very careful about it.
Two even three methodical and practical and like not to toot
my own horn but like we've been together on it.
Like I'm doing some of the stuff that you aren't as good at.
You're helping me with the stuff that I'm not as good at like
it's been very carefully planned and very well thought out which
I also think is really hard to do when you have ADHD and you
have like a really good idea that you're like really super
excited about. Also, I just decided in this
moment, this is the time where I'm going to open up my straw so
I can drink my coffee so I just I just I didn't.
I'm going to just enjoy the straw a somewhere.
First had the idea donkeys that's gonna be?
I'm sorry about that. Silly fight everybody when we
first had the idea you, you know, there was so much.
My mom always used to say that there's there's energy around a
good idea. Look, you can tell a good idea
just because all of a sudden you're just fat less tired.
You're like. Oh yeah you know.
Yeah and that was sort of happening and it's an amazing
elating. Almost like, euphoric feeling
when all of a sudden like holy shit, that's a great idea and
you like grab You by the shoulders and you were like
Eric, like, don't rush this, like we're going to take our
time, we're gonna go. We're I think you said build it,
build it to last, and I'm definitely feeling that now,
especially now that the discords open, and everybody is talking
to each other and get along, and coming up with Laura and like,
starting, I've already loves and stuff.
I'm just saying you can come join, hot AF pranks if you want,
but you have to dma. In asked me very nicely.
I'm going to secrecy. I'm so tempted.
Just send out the server IP and just go to screw we're starting
right now but this is like that last final, push of restraint.
But anyways, I so that's dear listener.
That is roughly. The the end of the episode is is
following through is pushing through his keeping going
keeping going keeping going which is a very hard thing to
do. It is when Katie in your life,
do you feel that? You've hit those moments of like
oh I have to keep going. Like, we have a moment.
Um, actually I have Have a reverse answer to that question,
really? Yeah.
Because, like one of the reasons like I don't, I don't know if we
talked about this a lot but like one of the reasons why I am so
just fucking proud of you. And, and so happy about how
Quest Craft is going. And honestly, like how just
infinite Quest is going is because I don't keep going a lot
of the time. Like, I'm a very hard worker and
I'm very like good at doing stuff.
But I do it in the short-term like, frankly.
So, Sunday is the one-year anniversary of us meeting a
person and it's like the evolution one year and three
weeks anniversary of the podcast.
Yes. But like, and that is really
scary to me, because I really like real vulnerable here for a
minute but like, because like, I've had a lot of like phases.
I've had a lot of phases in my life and a lot of them have to
do with, like hyper fixation. You know, like I had my
blacksmith face and I had my magician face and I had like,
all these And like, all of those phases were, like, really
important to me and they meant so much to me at the time and I
grew as a person and I changed as a person but I didn't keep
going like the novelty wore off and the the what I was what I
was interested in changed. You know what I mean?
And infinite Quest is one of the first things that I'm like I
want this to keep going. Like I want to build this to
last like the community that we have built and the The people
that we've met and the and the work that we're getting to do,
like it is become so important to me.
And so, like the keeping going of infinite Quest feels In some
ways exactly the same as like the day that I decided to become
a magician and I think that's what's scary about.
Yeah, it's because it's like, I remember being like fuck.
Yeah, Jake like let's go and I like hyper fixated on Magic and
I learned it and I put up a show and I was a performer and I
bought you know, and it was like and it all just happened because
that is my keeping going is like I can start a business.
I've started a hundred businesses, but keeping those
businesses going, keeping that project going, keeping that
Going. It's really hard.
Oh yes, really hard. I think I totally agree that.
I think the fact this is like happened before.
Yeah. Is what's really scary about it?
Like I do, it's like I don't, I don't trust it.
There's a mistrust kind of feeling because like, my brain
is looking for, that overcommitted moment.
What is the thing I said? Yes to that.
I shouldn't have what. When did I get in too deep?
You know, but This isn't that? Yeah, this is a different way.
Exactly. The same with infinite.
Quest it felt different. I mean, I remember when we first
met, I feel like I'm a dear. Listen, I know what we keep
bringing it back to like, Austin are specific thing.
Like, for not like we're promoting the podcast on the
podcast, but I promise, that's not our intent.
Hopefully, we perhaps we'll get more General as we move on.
But there was the same same fear.
I felt when we started infinite Quest.
And I, and when I think I Is when we realized what it was and
when we realize like, oh, this isn't like, oh yeah, I started a
podcast for a couple was cool. And then the dead.
And then we move on with our lives when it started to become,
holy shit. This is unlike anything I've
ever done before it. Was that same feeling of.
Yeah, I can't, just of, just waiting for the dopamine to wear
off basically. Yeah, of waiting, till the day,
where this thing that I feel so excited about now, will one day
be something that I'm just like, fuck?
How did I get myself into this? Because you I don't want to
speak for you, but I know I've certainly been there a million
times where I have like an epic brainstorming session with a
group of people about a project and I'm like hey I can do that.
Yes, sir all I did that video by.
I can do a video a week for the next two months or whatever it
is. Yeah, and then thinking, holy
shit, what did I just do? And it's it's been a really
useful inventory. Taking a moment for myself or
time for myself. This whole thing.
All that the quest graph inequalities because I'm it's
like it's how I say this. It's a useful case study in
watching my brain. Do what it does.
Yeah, it's really hard to watch your brain, do what it does but
noticing like oh look at that. When somebody said to me I'm
really excited for this or like quest Quest, For example, like
yesterday. When somebody said to me, I'm
really excited to look forward to this.
My brain went. Oh god.
Oh no. If I gotta go.
Yeah, and I had to like, oh whoa, what was that?
Yeah! What a my brain just do right
there. Holy shit, brain and like, and
it's hard to not. I I said this a long time ago in
the hygiene episode, but I try to not antagonize my brains
worse habits worst habits because one is mainly mainly
because it's not useful but also our brains do what it does
because our brain thinks that's what it should do.
Trying to protect us is trying to help us and so it's like what
is my Brain doing our. Why is my brain freaking out?
When this person told me that they were excited and it was
worried that it was looking at all the data behind me saying,
like, oh, you're gonna ruin that you're gonna, you're gonna
eventually get bored of this and walk off because that's
happened. A lot of times before.
Yeah. But I think consistently in
manually recognizing that I truly don't feel that.
This is one of those things or think this is one of those
things. This is different.
I'm not over committed. I am just committed.
Is a Range like new world and thank you.
It's been weird to watch my brain go through.
What has been going through lately.
Do you? I mean, do you feel similarly?
Do you feel that your brain is doing strange habitual things
while this is happening? Yeah, I mean it's it's we're
recording this episode. I'm like a really weird period
of my life. We're going to talk about this
more spoiled teaser trailer advertising the podcast on the
podcast. But we're going to talk about
this more. But I hired a team of Organizers
to come in and to basically help me with the house because it had
basically gotten to the point where it's just like completely
out of control because the keeping going of infinite Quest
and to keeping going of doing what I get to do means that I
don't have time. I just I just don't have time
and so it had gotten really, really bad.
And so I'm in this like really weird head space where like I'm
getting over the sort of like guilt and shame and frustration
and Terror of that experience, which by the way I cannot stress
is not has been just like the best fucking decision I have
ever made. Like it was, it was such a
fucking good decision to have this happen but I've been
thinking a lot about how I work and how my brain works and my
response to things and like How I process setbacks and
challenges, and all of this stuff.
And I've been, and I've learned a lot.
I've learned a lot about myself, and I also like, and, like, sort
of like, a weird, But it what, you know, when they have coffee
and then you buy at the store but then you pour water into it
and it makes more coffee. What do you call that?
Oh, oh yeah, yeah. Concentrate like this is like
Quest Craft has been like a very like concentrated version of
that like within this like larger.
So it's like, it's like a concentrated Inception, you know
what I mean? Which is like it's better.
It's like it's A lot stronger coffe coffee concentrate at the
bottom that said yes I just got some trace of the guys, I
concentrate and drink it but then somebody told me that
you're not supposed to do that. I did that very bad for you.
It did. They ready really?
At least the Trader. Joe's.
As they read it really small on the bottle.
Yeah, so just as like, cold, brew coffee a day and then
concentrate on the bottom. So I'm just like, oh, wow, my
heart is like, not happy with what I just drank.
Yeah, that's why I drink it to concentrate.
Thanks Trader, Joe's? Are you really laughing at that?
Dog wasn't dumbest shit I've ever sold.
No, it's not because it was ready to also the word
concentrate in that regard. I remember being a kid and
seeing like, not from concentrate on, you know, juice
things. Yeah.
And I was like, I asked one of my parents, I was like, that's
where it's so, what is what does that mean?
Because gyno concentrate, as like a word for the thing that
you do, when you're focusing is concentrating and they were
like, oh it also means, you know, they explained to me the
juice thing and And I remember thinking like that strange, that
that word means two different and unrelated things.
And then as I got older and started getting more curious
about language, you know, I start I realized like, oh,
they're concentrated because they're both like condensed
versions of so, you know, like you're concentrating your brain
space, you know? And I was like, woah language is
fucking cool, I'm nine, this is too much for me, I'm gonna go
outside. Anyways, we're talking about
something serious. Go hole in my backyard.
Go bang a rock with a hammer, right?
I recommend wear safety glasses though.
But yeah, like I think so. I guess like that, it's just
been really interesting because it's this past like couple of
weeks especially have really put a lot of things into perspective
for me especially because I'm burnt the fuck out on Tick-Tock.
Like I like and I know it's going to upset a lot of people
to hear that but like I'm very done with it.
Like and I'm gonna keep making tick tocks because it is like
where the bulk of my audience is but it's like I'm finding so
much more reward in things like twitch and and the quest graph
stuff and YouTube and like just like longer form stuff.
And also I don't have to like put my heart and soul into
something that is just completely dependent on an
algorithm that just fundamentally hates me.
But I'm really burned out on it and so like I've been Dealing
with this sort of like, weird like oh my God, like I'm really
burnt out. Does this mean I'm going to like
stop doing it. Like you know and then also at
the same time like we've been recording and my quest episodes
like a later and later and later in the day it sometimes on
Thursdays like today and it's okay like that is that's how
life happens and we've gotten to a place where the fuck was I
talking about? Burnt out on TV, right?
Yeah. Like we've gotten to a place
where like, you know, we can edit the episode in 20 minutes
as opposed to like when we first started and it took us two days.
Yeah. And so there's just all of this
like keeping going that's happening.
There's like the keeping going of, like, okay, I know that I
have to keep making Tik toks because that's like where my
platform is. But I also want to keep going in
these like other directions. But I also want to keep going in
terms of like Finding a balance between like work in life.
But I also want to keep going in terms of like learning how to
better ask for help and like, the experience would like the
organizers have been really possible but I also want to like
keep going with Quest graft and I want it to become something
really good at especially for you and so I'm just having
there's just like it's just like a lot.
Like it's just like a lot right now and I'm not mad about it or
the upset about it but it's just been like this really like
interesting. Couple of weeks in like really
evaluating like my, I guess like usual patterns of behavior
because I'm like, I'm too that like year mark and I'm like, oh,
oh, like this is where. This is, where this is where it
starts. But with that, it's only been a
year. Yeah.
And that's what I'm excited about the existential dread.
I have about like, oh, it's been a year that means it's time to
like find a new Focus or whatever.
But I think what we are discovering and I don't want to
speak for you, but I think one of the things that I'm
discovering is that like Keeping going can mean having infinite
Quest but then adding something new or like you know, changing
it up or like you know, maybe I'm going to make a few more
YouTube videos this month instead of Tik toks or whatever.
Like we can keep going and it can look different than it did
before but it doesn't mean that I'm completely abandoning it.
I'm not completely giving it up. I think that's really important.
Yeah, I also make any sense at all.
I feel like I'm just going like hopeful therapy on this episode.
So I'm really sorry to everybody at home.
I'm just like going through a lot right now.
Let me tell you if you're great, you're wonderful.
You're my favorite. Well, I think, and I kind of a
lot of times particularly as it relates to ADHD, the more
granularly I think about something or I guess medically,
the more granularly but for the the longer I think about
something granularly. The more likely it is that I
eventually will come to the realization that ADHD in the way
of the stuff that our brain does is all intrinsically related to
our experience. With time, time is time is
everything. But so much so many times, the
seemingly weird and complicated manifestations of Do not move.
Move your coffee away from your elbow, right?
This minute. Okay.
Thank you, sweetheart. I was, I was gesturing.
Pretty hard right then. Good eye sweetheart.
Lost your laptop. Oh no.
It was supposed to a lot of a lot of holy bejeebers creepers.
Sorry. No new rule coffee and Tac
dough. Mix is going to be, it's going
to be like a like a conservative dance.
We're going to 12 inches between Tech and coffee at All times I
was the most stage manager I have ever gotten in this, on
this podcast. Really good house good.
When I was a full Tak whole, that's really good.
Thank you sweetheart. So anyway, time time, yes, time
the universe and everything and I think it's important to not
immediately pathologize all Behavior as being due to your
nerd word. So absolutely we are every
person is a whole ass person. Your nerd emergencies is part of
who that is so I don't want to make it seem like Every single
thing. My brain does is a direct result
of my ADHD. That being said, some things
that it does. Our director old result of my
ADHD but because ADHD is so fundamental.
It often is hard to track what is and is not ADHD, like, what
is just something that I'm I've trained myself to do over the
years, or what is a response to a situation that happened years
ago. And what is ADHD weirdness?
But I think a good tell for if something is ADHD, weirdness is,
does it have to do with your relationship?
Ation ship to time and frankly ones, misunderstanding of time
and illiteracy with time. And in my case, I want to speak
for everybody. I mean you can your I mean
you're at least speaking for me as well.
So it's nice to us but time is is the signature on the that
sort of thing? Yeah, for example, well you just
set your web at the year mark like that a year is a long
fuckin time in some respects, sometimes it goes very fast.
Yeah. But on a more granular level.
Like for example, today, we were doing a bunch of work before
this and as soon as we're done recording this, we're going to
do a bunch more stuff, but I think I'll fuck, I need a change
over the laundry. Do you want to do on it doing a
pause? No.
I'll just be like, okay, I'm sure.
Literally just remember that because you were talking about
the work we did earlier and I forgot.
But hand over your laundry. Also take out your garbage and
drink some water. Nice nice, nice, nice.
It led that helped at least a couple people, right?
Well you should garbage day tomorrow.
Maybe, maybe. I know for some of you it is but
I have like a one in seven chance of a great looking at you
Kyle, Kyle, it's garbage day tomorrow.
Okay, somewhere out there. There's a Kyle just like what
the fuck just happened. Also Samantha.
Your keys are on the counter. Oh shit.
I think we just realized as a whole new games that we can play
as a new one, I like this game. But um, I think if I had a
better working understanding of time and a better literacy with
how I manage my time I think what takes me a full 8-hour day
of weird clerical computer eat IP work would actually take
honestly like an hour and a half if Was really for organized
about it. I think about like in a kitchen.
For example, for those of you who don't know, I was I was a
cook for almost 10 years and professionally and a lot of the
time when you think of all the if you just stamped, if you just
think of the things you have to do before service, all the
things you have to prep and shop and put in place and clean and
all that stuff. It's like there's no possible
fucking way I could do that in two hours or so but the only way
to survive in a, you know, high-level kitchen is to
fiercely organize that time which I had a really hard time
doing but I had to learn to do it and eventually you realize
you can get a living fuck ton done in two hours if you're very
deliberate about how you organize your time.
So anyways, this type of work, the computer rework, the writing
Discord rules and thank you an, for all the dangerous stuff
we've been doing. Thank you.
And, and keeping up with constant messages coming.
All that stuff. I'm, that is by far, the type of
work that I'm the worst at. Yeah.
And so anyways, all this is to say that stench of oh, my this
this comes down to my lack of a working understanding of time,
that's the thread throughout. This that is just all over me
right now where I'm constantly thinking like, wow, I am taking
eight hours to do what could be done in an hour and a half
because of my literacy with time.
Yeah. But that's also one of the
reasons This is a bit of a tangent on what would probably
already was a tangent but I don't remember hanjin deception.
Whoa, concentrate continent in its tangent.
Second option. Oh I lost it.
Wait no I got I got I got it, I got it.
Oh a lot of this is also been an exercise in practicing things
that I'm really shitty at which is one of the main reasons.
I also really like Minecraft is because a lot of the things that
Minecraft asks of the person playing Minecraft is something
that I Really fucking struggle with, which is part of you know
why I find it useful, not just enjoyable, but useful.
Well, anyways, there's a lot going on it.
So, it's been a lot longer, but it be either way.
I'm trying to figure out basically what are the things
that I can change and what are the things that I need to
accept? Essentially, because this is not
a case where I think I've overcommitted, this is a just,
I've decided to commit and that's a scary thing.
Thing to do. I suppose really teed off at the
end there. I'm sorry but it is genuinely
been a long couple days. Well, for what?
It's worth. I'm really really proud of you
time for an interstitial Oh hey look a takes me.
Carl Channing give me be Christopher Walken.
Yeah you made it to the middle of the episode.
Good job could be do graduations, drink some water, I
was in Reservoir Dogs. This is he who were not in
Reservoir Dogs. Okay, and I was in, I was in
scary movies to something straight.
Yeah, this is, it will make sense if you listen to the rest
of the Second, you'll get it. Well, hey, before we bring back
to the the real episode where we're not just, I mean, we're
jacking around in that episode 2, I guess.
Yeah. But we wanted to let you know
that we are currently in the process of especially with Quest
Craft of sort of expanding the infinite Quest universe.
So if you're not following us over on Twitch and if you're not
following us over on YouTube, you should do that.
You should do that because we're going to start making a lot more
like, long form content. We're gonna start doing, we're
streaming, and we're really, really excited.
About it. It's going to be a lot different
than Tick-Tock, but we're really pumped for indeed.
It is about to go down Elsewhere on the internet, so follow.
Hey, good on Twitch and YouTube. Follow kpo Soros on Twitch and
YouTube because a bunch of shit is about to start happening over
there. And we're going to reference it
a lot probably and you're not going to know what's going on.
So from me Christopher Walken. Yeah, boop.
Boop, boop do kill. This is my signature Carol
Channing It's a dance. You can't see it, but it's been
doing it. Just flailing my fingers around.
Anyways, back to the episodes. In blue, blue, blue, blue, try
it. Welcome back.
What a good interstitial that was one, dude.
Holy shit. Fucking enters.
Also do here, my hip pop? No, I didn't.
I was just got style. I have the recording now.
So I'm going to, I'm going to isolate it.
Andre mix it. Well, yeah, it's not just set it
to MIDI keys, on a keyboard. That's great.
Thought it was a good initial. Do I really like the musical
number that was really good. Yeah.
The the part, where you performed the entire monologue
from Hamlet? Oh yeah, it's really good.
Well, I mean your Christopher Walken impersonation was spot.
I mean, it was nothing compared to your Carol Channing.
I don't know who that is, but I'm glad to know ya.
It's join here again. It sounds like this.
Hey, look at me. I'm Carol Channing Opieop do
weirdly. Close for not knowing who
Carolina Gun. Hey, Carol Channing, how are you
hearing my mom's not good actor, yeah, nailed it, nailed it.
And I'm from the fifties. And I have two eyes, actually.
Carol turning famously had an eye patch.
Oh, really? Yeah, and it was also a dog,
it's Carol. Standing was a dolly actress, a
Labrador, Retriever in a trench coat.
So anyway, speaking of Carol, Channing at a church.
Hello Dolly. That was very funny.
Really funny was you say, oh, I so think about it.
I was thinking about I was thinking about something because
you were talking about time and and a year.
And and and I think it's really interesting because like,
there's this part of me that feels like I've been doing
infinite quest for forever because like that's how That's
how my brain works. It's either like now or forever
ago or an impossibly long distance away.
There really isn't an in between, which makes like we're,
but I'm weirdly good at event planning and I will never
understand why. But like, one of the things that
I am trying to figure out how to like get to this point, but
like, well, okay, actually a really good idea or a really
good way of presenting. This is talking about the
organizers, some more So, I have craft room, and I'm going to
make a Tic Tac about this. But like my craft room has been,
just like a deeply, rooted seed of Shame, and guilt and
embarrassment for a very long time because it was it
completely unusable space. It it went from like, oh I'm
going to put some boxes in there to like just Yeet every empty
cardboard box and piece of thing that I don't know what to do
with and it wound up being like Really bad.
And so these organizers came in and in, I shit you not less than
three hours had made the space completely functional.
And that, you know what I mean? And it's just like, and, you
know, like if you hear bumps and, and, and clunks in the
background, it's because they're actually finishing up right now
as we record this podcast, but, like, washing that happen like
watching a couple of people come in and do.
What literally has taken me three years in three hours?
I was very humbling it was very embarrassing.
A little bit, I mean it really made me think about time, you
know, like that kind of thing. But even more than that it also
made me kind of weirdly reflect on on keeping going if we're
going to circle back to the topic because it's like, oh
yeah, they just did it until it was done but like I don't I
can't do that. I really struggle with that.
I'm really curious because what I saw that happen when I've seen
everything they've done as I like walk around your house and
Lisa the shelves you see the shelter?
Yeah my gosh all sorts of like boxes and stuff.
Yeah like pretty and stuff incredible but what I've as I
walk around and I think this is just because of my background in
music and cooking as I walk around the house and see the
stuff that they've done, I think of skill.
Yeah, I think I wonder what practices and I'm using that
word very deliberately Yeah, they're using to do this because
I doubt any of them were just like born being this good.
I mean, perhaps I'm sure they had some sort of natural.
Aptitude who knows? But well, there's no way you're
next week. What?
I was going to say but she agreed to be on the podcast,
right? Yeah.
So now we're going to talk to her for that.
I know it's gonna be around so curious what she has to say, but
that's what what Rings your means.
I wonder what rules that you like if they have concrete
rules, like, I noticed she talked a lot about Invisible.
Which I love specifically for people with ADHD but I'm
wondering like what are the tenets that are like the laws
for them that they follow? We'll find out next time.
Find out next week but I'm sorry you were gonna say something.
No I was going to go on a whole thing about neanderthals oh
that's weird I'm still going to but that's alright.
Well one of the things that I also think gosh, how do I phrase
this so, Secretly deep deep down in my soul.
I want to be a McElroy. That is I promise I'm going
somewhere with this but like for those of you who don't know,
they're just family and they're basically like the best
podcasters and they've been doing it for forever.
And they are the reason why I love DOD and it's just like,
it's in. I really look up to them as
podcasters And very recently I was I was like supposed to be on
a panel with with a McIlroy and that was one of the weirdest
moments of my life because I have been doing this for a year.
And so like in the in the keeping going of infinite Quest,
there have been so many moments where like I'm like I idolize,
these are like em. Oh yeah.
Like I don't like our good friend Adam.
You're not listening because we just we were just talking about
you yesterday or talk about how fucking great you are.
Yeah, we were, um, we actually, we were,
you know, people like and the McElroy's and, and these like
other, like, really successful podcasters, are people that
like, I like wildly look up to. and, at some point, I had this
moment where I went, I've been doing this a year, like, The
McIlroy, like the, like Adventure Zone, like, didn't
happen in a year, you know, like it was built.
It was grown like that platform was built and grown.
And so, like one of the big, like, motivators for me, in
terms of keeping going, has really become.
Like, I want to see what happens.
Like, I just I just do like I like and it's weird.
Like, it's one of the things that I, this is going to take
such a dark turn, but it's like, I'm going to die before I I know
what happens and that sucks because like I want to find out
what happens to the entire universe.
Like I want to see like what happens to civilization and I
want to know, like do we ever get spaceships, you know, like
that kind of thing. Tell you this, but we very much
have space. Yeah.
But like cool spaceships. Not like lame boner spaceships.
Okay, one funny on his face, that was a funny thing to say,
right there. Very quick.
Funny but I'm thinking is, is I'm thinking?
Is it like a lame boner spaceship?
Or is it a lame boner space is? It's a spaceship that looks like
a boner that is lame or is it like a lame spaceship?
Because it looks like a boner but like you know it's like is
the is are you comparing the spaceship to Ale?
Boner. Anyways, that took, I'm going to
that hit different you decide. I'm gonna go with secret bonus
options. See it's actually a vagina.
No, no, no, that was terrible. But leave it in.
Okay, like I feel like the closest thing to a vagina
spaceship we have so far is College Rob.
Oh no. The was a really good job.
Like the like the Mandalorian spaceships.
I feel like those kind of look like vagina.
Yeah. Yeah, well, I solve I guess if
we're using proper terminology, this is another thing.
I something one of my pet peeves in like sci-fi shows and movies
and stuff. So on the ships look like
vulvas. No, yes, yes, exactly.
That's a transformation look. More like a lame boner, but what
it once it once in a space. What's your in space?
There's no such thing as aerodynamic.
It doesn't matter. Like the dust doesn't matter,
right? Because what it looks rad,
what's right? So like, whenever I see a
spaceship, That never is in the atmosphere.
It's just only in space but has like wings.
Yeah, fuck is the point once when they're hot, when they're
in an atmosphere, that's a different story.
But like, when they're, like on the moon and they are only on
them. Anyways, it's a whole thing.
But vagina, spaceships. Totally a thing.
Not very practical like in an atmosphere but once you're in
space, look you know, you could spin it and get artificial
gravity going on, you know, Kerbal Space Program.
Shoutout. Yeah.
Anyways it's very serious mental.
Health podcast we're talking about today.
Welcome to our top 50 mental health podcasts.
So today's topic is very Vulva spacious crows are cawing up
next. We got Joe Rogue but you were
talking about I do because I derailed us all about, you were
talking about how I want to see what her dress to see what
happens. And so like, one of the things
is like like I don't think we we ever started this project to to
become like a like a like a famous pod killing.
I'm just gonna say it like I don't think we saw it to become.
Famous podcasters. I think we just wanted to like,
see what what happened? Yeah.
And so like this whole thing has been a grand experiment of just
seeing what would happen over and over and over again.
And so like I'm really excited for year five, like I think your
five is going to look very different than year one and I
hope that we're still friends and you want to still talk to
me, but like I worry about that Cesaro pretty goddamn constantly
all the time. I worry about that area.
But like, but that's but that's it is like I want to know like
what What, what happens? Like, whoa, what does this
become? What does this look like?
And so like the Curiosity and the excitement of the, keeping
going of this project that like we've started together and it is
so meaningful and important to me.
And it has, I mean, it's changed both of our lives.
Like I literally right behind me.
I have the Post-it note that I wrote my favorite thing that
you've ever said she was six months ago.
I was a pizza cook. Yes.
My favorite thing you've ever said in an interview really?
Yeah, because it just is just like this, this whole thing, the
keeping going, the decision to like wake up every day and work
a fucking 12-hour day and build this community and make the
content and admin the content, which honestly neither of us are
good at. I'm slightly better in that I
like can type faster than you but like the keeping going like
it. The keeping going has changed
our lives forever. Yeah, I think fundamentally the
keeping going is worth it. Yeah, just that just feel sad
that it's worth it. I mean I was thinking as we were
whereas I was researching how to make Quest Craft be a thing not
to keep bringing it back to the plug but you know, go follow.
Hey, good on YouTube, The Quest Craft challenge Erik really
quickly. Yeah, what's a Quest Craft 3
times vary? Quest, Craft Quest.
Craft Quest Craft. I was surprised a lot of people
who can't do. It was very scarred.
We're learning this. Really, it's Quest.
Craft is very hard to say. Quickly Quest, Craft Court, it
is Quest Craft Quest Craft. Its you see well we're going to
have to do you see, we're going to have to figure the cool crap,
quick vacucraft. She cracked.
But as I was doing research on other successful, we're I'll end
by successful. I mean servers that have been
around for a while and have like successfully.
Chained, an active Community. I like how did those work and
and I want to name drop anything but you and I happen to know
some people who are very prominent who were and still are
very prominent Minecrafter. People fans, mmm-hmm fancy boy
in a bubble at elbows are convention, man.
And a lot of them are connected to wonderful.
Nice people. And that's it turns out those,
some of those elbows are just connected to very rad.
People who just like one tool, hang out with you which is
startling and weird. But as well, There are a lot of
servers. Well, let's just take one, which
is one of the most successful servers ever hermitcraft server.
It was started its in its eighth season so 80 or ish but season
one started it was fights with it was existed season to a
little better season 3. I don't know.
Something happened a bunch of people left season 3 was like a
crash like holy shit like this could be the end of it but then
they did a season for And then a season five and then it's in so
on and it got too, and I got to come back.
They didn't stop after that rough season 3 and season for
wasn't amazingly spectacular comeback.
Either it was just a regular old but they just fucking kept
going. And now her, you know, by your
hermit crab season eight were on, it's this massive wonderful
project that creates a bunch of amazing content for amazing
people. It's like just genuinely an
awesome Force for good in the world like and then none of that
would have happened if they had stopped after They kept going,
they got to see what happened and it was worth it.
I banged a spring, I think of it, sort of, almost like,
rolling the dice like just, you know, there's a lot of
Randomness in bullshit and Chaos that goes on and on and in a
person's life and You just just wrote he had bad rolls.
Yeah, so sometimes you get bad roles for years but you just
keep going, you just keep rolling the dice.
I also, another weird analogy that my brain shocked out was
was thinking about how a video game character particularly I
was think about the game jak3 from the Jak and Daxter series,
one of my favorite games of all time.
If any of you play that game, hi im a Jak and Daxter fan.
I But I remember thinking I was like a kid.
I was probably 14 ish but I remember thinking there a lot of
really hard bosses in that game. So I won't go into the details
of the game, but basically you're a character, you play
through levels, its kind of platform, jumpy there, bang,
Bang, shooty, shooty, there bunch of bosses that you have to
fight some of, which are very hard and you just die over and
over and over and over and over again.
You know, back when video games were actually difficult instead
of anyway. Now, no huge video game rant
Eric know that is for the podcast that you're going to
start a year from now again I want to see what happens but I
remember thinking no matter how strong the villain is and how
you know comparably week the character is the villain the
boss is outmatched. Every time hopelessly outmatched
for one, very specific reason and that's that you respawn and
you come back. The boss will never win provided
that you keep playing over time. The boss will lose 100% of the
time, as long as you keep playing, because you will always
respond. And you will always try again.
And that makes the weakest of characters unfuckin defeatable
because they will come back, and they will try again.
And I took that to heart. I think about that all the time,
no matter what condition or position you're in.
If you persistence getting back up trying again makes you
unbeatable, makes you the most powerful thing in the universe,
no matter what you're up against is you just keep fucking going
and that is something that I don't know.
I really value a lot That's the smartest thing you have ever
said, really? If you don't get a TED talk and
you don't say exactly those words and exactly that order, I
will be furious. And there is no justice in this
universe. Jesus is a bad time to tell you,
I do. I'm not recording any of this,
I'm kidding. I clearly am ican ican.
You can see the thing, but no, I really mean it.
I mean, a lot of times I think it's something that's really
something that I have to work on constantly is Discrediting
cliches because they sound dorky and weird.
But a lot of cliches I want to say all of them, but a lot of
cliches are cliches, a, you know, trite sayings.
Because they're so fucking insanely true that although it
sounds annoying. It is correct.
So for example, Dory from motherfucking Finding Nemo, just
keep swimming. It's like that's such a nice
thought but it's like I think that all the time.
I think that like several times a day just just keep going not
not for any profound moral. No reason not because it's like
logically the right thing to do. You just keep going.
Just keep just keep rolling the dice because that is an
unbeatable Force persistence kind of why I like Spider-Man a
lot. And I also like into the
spider-verse is he just says the Only Rule to being Spider-Man is
you just always get back up. And that's one of the reasons of
Spider-Man is on people. Even when he's hopelessly
outmatched is he will never give up.
And like again, those cliches of like You know, never give up
like it all sounds so trite, but I fully subscribed to it.
So anyways, hermitcraft Jak and Daxter series Spider-Man.
All wrapped in the same bubble keeping going is, just always
the correct answer and it's not because it always is obvious,
not because it's always feels right or that, it's always seems
logically correct? But just because no matter what
position you're in or what you're up against keeping going,
Going, that's a power that you can always have.
You can always fan that flame within you.
I mean, I really mean it. Yeah, you want to hear my
Neanderthal rant? I teased her Neanderthal, rant,
what was it on a rant? But it's a point, I think it's
really interesting. I would, I am, I am I don't even
understand. I'm facin it.
I'm just buckling the fucking see where this goes, please.
Please, please go. Well, or so neanderthals.
Neanderthals, coexisted with got if I'd pride is listening, this,
she's gonna correct me on this or something.
I'd probably, that is, it tick tock whose fantastic, you should
follow and I interviewed them. The other day and I haven't
passed the episode yet because I'm very busy, but soon enough
my interview odd Pride will be posted, go follow them.
Anyways, neanderthals coexisted with Homo sapiens for a little
while couple thousand years neanderthals although we use
that as like an insult, you know, you know cells were
actually smarter they're bigger brains and they were stronger
than Homo sapiens but hand with all's died out and Homo Ian's
survived. We survived even though we were
weaker and we were Dumber. Why?
Well Katie. There's a number of theories.
I mean nobody was there. So it's hard.
So these are my thoughts, but the people who know a lot about
this, have a number of theories, mainly since the Neanderthals
were very strong and very smart, if they needed to hunt a thing,
they would just go up and just beat the shit out of it because
there were strong enough to do that.
Okay, Homo sapiens were weaker. Every time you say Homo sapiens
I think you're To say homosexuals and then it's
funnier in my head every single time.
You are an adult person. I know, I have to grease and I
still giggle at the word homo sapiens.
All right. Oh yeah, I mean the word.
Masticate is hilarious. I mean, come on.
It's just some things while I was with my dad wants one of the
wisest thing to Dad ever said to me is I mean I'm paraphrase
probably toss this around my head a little bit.
Just never don't laugh at farts like no matter who you are what
you're doing in life. If you're a senator like just
farts are funny. Just laugh at farts.
Okay. If you ever get to a point in
your life where you don't feel like, Should could laugh at
farts. You get, you know, you got some
self, certainly some soul-searching to do, but the
Neanderthal uniforms and Homo sapiens Homo sapiens were
weaker. So homo sapiens couldn't just
run up and beat the shit out of the thing.
They had to invent different technologies that were more
clever and safer. If they had to invent ranged
things they had to invent complicated hunting strategies
because they couldn't just run up and beat the shit out of it
because they were weaker. And And didn't have those
complex brighter, but largest brains, they had to address.
What is the best way to hunt this?
Mammoth neanderthals didn't have to do the best way because
perfect a decent way work just fine right.
Homo sapiens didn't have that luxury.
They had to be clever about it because they couldn't just brute
force it and do it. This just feels like not
science. I believe you it just seems
dicey. I don't know why.
Well if I'm wrong you know please.
The emails in a minibus and really like to know.
Yeah. But I believe you.
It's just seems weird. I don't know why.
Anyways, you know, those aren't around anymore.
We are and that. Yeah, I think about this guy's.
I think about that all the time when it comes to the things that
were bad at when it comes to ADHD.
For example, out, I have ADHD, I am profoundly unorganized but
I'm also 27. I have a blood of life ahead of
me. Hopefully, And although I am
profoundly awful at organization, I now have an
appreciation for organization that somebody for whom or to
whom organization comes naturally, may not have.
I the only way for me to be organized, I see what you think
about a really good way of doing it.
And to think about what is organization mean, what is the
function of organization? What happens when you're not
organized? What does being organized allow?
If all that stuff just intuitively can to me like it
seems to for Of people who are just always been organized
people. That's great.
That's awesome. But they perhaps don't have as
deep of an appreciation for it if they were to have lacked it
for a very long time. Yeah.
And so when I'm bad at something, ADHD wise, I'm think
I'm in a way I'm grateful because the fact that I'm bad at
the thing, makes me appreciate what being good at it could do
for me and appreciate the work. Work that it would take to get
there, not all the time. It's very frustrating to be bad
at certain things, but some of the most organized people, I
know weird profoundly unorganized for like 30 years
but because of that, they had to address it.
They couldn't just sort of, you know, throw stuff places.
Or, for example, that's one good example is, you know, I set
things down and forget where I put them hundreds of times a
day, it is frustrates me to no end.
And because of that, I think very deeply and very frequently
about how to avoid that problem. Where should I put things?
How do I avoid setting things down and forgetting?
So I have to put hooks places. I have to have little drawers
for things and now you know I think I showed you a while ago,
when you first saw my old apartment with all the little
boys I said, okay, he asked me where my dongle is and you're
like, where's you're doing? And I like just reach back open
to Tiny jar and it was right there because I had a bunch of
labeled as drawers, you know. But basically, When we're bad
at, when you're naturally bad at something, or when you're
naturally not good at something or when you lack a skill, I
think it lends an appreciation for the scale that you might
not. Otherwise have if you just have
always had it being starting at a detriment makes its, it's not
fair and it's there's a lot of work to be done which can really
suck but you get stuff out of that if you you decide to you
know the unobserved unexamined life is not worth living.
I don't necessarily Agree with that.
But if you decide to appreciate that work, I think it can do a
lot for us. Certainly you know, fuck
Neanderthals. I feel like though that just
makes you good at organization because, you know, that you're
bad at it. And so you've developed a system
to make yourself organized, like, you know, where your
dongle is will write. But I think, I think because you
kept going, they're like the frustration is what I'm saying.
Nice, bring it back. I did you like that?
You did you just so I just want to shout out the like three
people who listen to you talking and then you said, living the
unexamined life and then they all thought of Wicked at the
same time. So shout out to see that and
wicked. Yes really yes I was thinking
about like three people who just want.
Oh yeah, that song and then like moved on with our day but I just
wanted you to know that if you're listening dear listener
and you thought that I'm right here with you, I was thinking
about Demetri Martin, this comedy special.
If I got one of the best things I've ever seen in my entire
life, you right now is so underappreciated.
I feel like I have them on the podcast.
I feel like he got shafted by John Mulaney because they were
like coming up at the same time and then like John Mulaney like
got like way more popular. But like, they're like so
different like same audience, very different styles.
Do each one came about a little earlier than John Mulaney
because yeah, yeah, yeah, his Comedy Central and special was
in like mid to late 2000s. He got his own show for a little
while, important things with Demetri Martin.
Yeah, but he is a very what he does is very much different he
does. Yeah, like it is Demetri Martin
style house stuff, but yeah, I'll go watch if I it is one of
the most amazing things. I've ever seen in my life and it
prompted like a year-long palindrome phase for me, I wrote
a very long palindrome. Anyways, what's the comedy
special where they was like a show?
And it was like, the two old guys, but they weren't actually
old guys. Oh, it's oh, hello.
Yeah, but that is Millennia Nicole, my favorite thing I've
ever watched. Did you go?
Did you see? Oh, hello.
Yes, like on Broadway! Oh no, I saw, I watched like the
special, okay, but that shit was like, that's all improv fucking
so goddamn good. It's great.
There's one. They do a bit where it's like,
it's really, you know, it's John Mulaney and Nick Kroll.
They Play these the character of these two old guys is brilliant
and but they but it's all improv'd like they did.
They just they just money as has said like we're just sort of
discovering these characters. So like as we do I think we
discover like oh this happened to this character, I didn't
realize that, you know, but it was a do a bit where they
interview like a celebrity and the whole thing it the whole
time. They just have a sandwich on the
middle of the table. It's a tuna sandwich and it has
way too much tuna on. It's like a massive and it was
just two pieces of bread. The show is called too much tuna
and the Applause line at the very end.
The one thing that I imagine they like tell them still
everywhere. And is at some point we're going
to ask you about the sandwich. I don't know how I'm going to
but at some point we're going to add prompt you to comment on the
sandwich in which case the celebrity has to say.
I think there's too much tuna and then that's the end of the
show, you know, it's there's too much tuna everybody claps.
I just comedians, man. I you know, we didn't have to
live in that couldn't because that could have not existed.
We could live in a world Too much tuna did not exist.
But, two people had a very dumb idea, and they took it very
seriously and we live in a more enriched and writer world
because of it. And I love it.
And that's how infinite Quest happens.
That's exactly, that's exactly. Like you were saying that
sentence. I went you're literally just
describing us right now it's hopeless right.
We're going to help Attica happens.
Ice Eric like remember the volcano that sounds okay.
Alright mccarrick is how all this has happened is Just us two
fucking jackasses out onstage and I figure out their lives.
The best thing that's ever happened to Katie high, five
high five, That's gonna sound weird because that's in between
our two like lean on that before.
All right, well he's own. I'm gonna go try to pretend
that. I know how to do Discord.
You gotta edit the podcast. First load, I also have to do
that. Yeah, sure.
I'm gonna write the episode description.
Hey, thanks. We did.
You guys know that I wrote the episode descriptions and Eric
edits, the episodes. It's fun.
Fact. Upon fact, fun.
Fun podcast fact. Turner and Hooch wait, which one
am I? Which one do you want to be on
which one makes? Isn't that an okay thing to say
which one? Would you not be mad at me?
For Spurs? Me strike for you.
Sequestered, okay. And broadcast.
And that's it. That's the whole thing.
That's the episode end of the episode.
Congratulations. You listen to it.
You did it. You did the whole thing.
I hope you finished the dishes that you were in.
So you don't have to like, find another podcast to listen to but
like it's like an awkward amount of time.
Like you only have like 10 minutes more of dishes Worth to
do so, like we can listen the first ten minutes of a podcast,
you know, as well we should we should do that.
We should make Like bonus round tiny little episodes that's just
like, just in case you have like a little more laundry to fold
but the episode is and you can listen to one of the time you
had about how good of an idea that really good idea.
Right? Is is pretty solid.
Oh well, hey everybody. Speaking of just more infinite
Quest stuff if you like infinite Quest and you like what we're
doing and your infant interested in supporting our mission of
advocacy and education about mental health and
neurodivergent. See you can do that by visiting
patreon.com slash infinite Quest and become a member of our
patreon. On family.
And as Nez now, tradition, whenever you join our patreon
family, we put your name in a song and I want to be very
clear. The end of this verse is not a
bit. It's just something incredible
that the Universe gave to us. So I just want you to know that
that we're you'll just you'll it's fine.
I don't know what you're talking about.
We're finding out together. Here we go lalalalala this week.
We have Some new patrons to think, and they're the people
who make this happen. We got in a van.
I'm 10 vile. Look at.
Oh my God, it unfulfilled. Oh, that was supposed to be the
angle. That was it there better be the
end of the party was fine. We can but didn't happen.
It's cool that con grat cot. And Charlotte and Dan.
You're the new patreon subscribers.
Hey, Liz and Dan and Charlotte. Thank you very much as well and
don't forget our good friends. Lilac, who's smells really good?
Fair? But most importantly, we've got
two new. People for the patreon family
Fluvanna, banana Fluvanna, and I'm Fluvanna as well.
There's enough Fluvanna, team Fluvanna, team Anna.
Team Fluvanna team. Hannah came Fluvanna.
Do You anna team Sarah? Half that cord?
I'm deliriously tired. Hey, everybody from all of us
here at infinite Quest. Remember to eat a snack.
Remember to take your meds, remember to drink some water.
Remember to be kind to yourself, be kind to others and remember
that we love you. So, from all of us here at
infinite Quest, have a great week, we'll see you next week,
and also, we should check our patreon messages because we've
got a bunch of them. Please finish it.
Well, you get team Anna over here.
You know what? Which one's the vampire.
And which one is the werewolf in which one of us is Bella.
I mean, clearly, it's me. Yeah.
Obviously, I feel very much much more like a stab.
The fuck are you. Is that another character?
Oh okay.