1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:06,680 I mean, I search for peace, I search for hope, I search for 2 00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:13,480 love, and one day for release. God give me strength to accept 3 00:00:13,600 --> 00:00:17,360 the things that I just cannot know. 4 00:00:18,720 --> 00:00:24,520 And even when I lose control, I will not let you go. 5 00:00:30,640 --> 00:00:33,720 Good morning. But if Daniel, I want to lead 6 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:35,680 pastors here at Res Church welcome. 7 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:37,200 We're in a series called Sound Mind. 8 00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:41,880 This is week 4 and we're covering hope for relational 9 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:45,920 wounds today. Man, a while. 10 00:00:45,920 --> 00:00:48,760 This is a couple years back now, before I was on staff, I was 11 00:00:48,760 --> 00:00:52,320 just a volunteer at the church and I was standing in the, the 12 00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:54,560 old church office at the time. And I was scrolling through this 13 00:00:54,560 --> 00:00:57,720 big church survey we've done and I was looking, there's like 14 00:00:57,720 --> 00:01:00,240 hundreds of of comments at the end of every response. 15 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:02,680 And so I was just kind of reading them all and I, and I 16 00:01:02,680 --> 00:01:06,280 ran across one that was essentially criticizing the 17 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:08,400 preaching. Now, I don't really preach back 18 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,360 then, but I thought the preaching was really awesome. 19 00:01:11,360 --> 00:01:13,360 And so I remember reading this and I was sending it was like 20 00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:15,320 just me and a friend in the church office. 21 00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:17,680 And so I remember not only reading it out loud to my 22 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:23,760 friend, but then like giving my honest opinion about that 23 00:01:23,760 --> 00:01:29,000 opinion in a not so gentle way, very sarcastically, because, you 24 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:32,160 know, we were alone. So what I what I did not know at 25 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:35,160 the time is out of the hundreds of people that responded that 26 00:01:35,160 --> 00:01:37,400 the person that had written that was sitting in the next room 27 00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:39,840 listening to the whole conversation. 28 00:01:42,000 --> 00:01:50,720 And I would not find that out for two years, two years, two 29 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:53,400 years that person would would harbor that that wound. 30 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:56,000 And it got more and more infected. 31 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,400 So much so that later when they finally came and talked to me, 32 00:01:58,400 --> 00:02:02,160 they said that for two years they couldn't be in the same 33 00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:07,320 room with me. And so it took about 10 minutes 34 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:10,800 at some point for them to explain and for me to apologize. 35 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:15,360 10 minutes. And instead of 10 minutes, they 36 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:20,120 spent two years hurting, two years of resentment, 2 years of 37 00:02:20,240 --> 00:02:22,160 fake conversations in their head. 38 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:23,640 Y'all have never had any of those, right? 39 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:28,920 Two years of fostering and cultivating A relational wound 40 00:02:28,920 --> 00:02:32,360 instead of healing. You know, when you, when you 41 00:02:32,720 --> 00:02:38,360 take an offence or a wound, it creates a debt much like a 42 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:40,480 weight. If you've ever experienced it, 43 00:02:40,480 --> 00:02:42,560 it feels like there's been weight added. 44 00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:45,280 So today we're going to, we're going to discuss hope for 45 00:02:45,280 --> 00:02:47,760 relational wounds. Any anyone here ever had a 46 00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:51,520 conflict with anyone? I mean, not everyone raised 47 00:02:51,520 --> 00:02:54,400 their hand, which is surprising to me because I just feel like 48 00:02:54,400 --> 00:03:00,480 you're lying in church. I'm going to come up here and 49 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:02,360 bare my soul and wear a backpack. 50 00:03:02,360 --> 00:03:03,960 At least you can do is be honest with me. 51 00:03:05,320 --> 00:03:08,600 See, I think at some point this is everyone. 52 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:11,680 Everyone that is human has experienced not just one, but 53 00:03:11,680 --> 00:03:14,640 probably more than one relational wounds. 54 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:17,200 I think it's a universal human problem. 55 00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:19,440 And so we're actually going to investigate kind of this overall 56 00:03:19,440 --> 00:03:23,280 question today of just how do we navigate a world in which people 57 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:25,840 are messy and life doesn't seem fair. 58 00:03:28,320 --> 00:03:32,800 Now, you may have noticed, not so coincidentally, that when we 59 00:03:33,240 --> 00:03:35,960 we we preached on hope for anxiety, it was Justin. 60 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:37,960 When we preached on hope for burnout, it was Nate. 61 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:40,640 Not that those guys have anything to, you know, special 62 00:03:40,640 --> 00:03:41,920 to say about any of those things. 63 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:45,080 So why then did I get relational wounds? 64 00:03:45,080 --> 00:03:47,040 Well, here's why this is a good topic. 65 00:03:47,440 --> 00:03:49,400 I read this study recently and I thought this is this is 66 00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:54,080 interesting. Most people will lose 5 to 7 67 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:58,480 significant relationships over the course of their life. 5 to 7 68 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:03,120 deep substantial relationships. But pastors lose on average five 69 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:05,800 to seven significant relationships per year. 70 00:04:09,320 --> 00:04:11,760 Just think about how that adds up. 71 00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:15,080 This is actually the nature of pastoral ministry. 72 00:04:15,080 --> 00:04:17,640 Like here's the reality. When people leave the church, 73 00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:20,959 they almost never leave for a good reason and they're really 74 00:04:20,959 --> 00:04:22,680 messy about it and they never leave well. 75 00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,480 Like it's super rare that someone leaves the church. 76 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:25,960 Well. And so normally what happens, 77 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:28,760 this is just human nature when they leave is they need to 78 00:04:28,760 --> 00:04:31,400 demonize where they left because it helps them justify with their 79 00:04:31,400 --> 00:04:34,800 decision. And so it always, almost always 80 00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,360 is a very messy. And so pastors are just 81 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:41,720 frequently faced with relational loss and relational wounds at a 82 00:04:41,720 --> 00:04:45,920 scale that very few people really have a parallel with. 83 00:04:45,960 --> 00:04:48,440 I, I, I read somebody talked about like, how is it? 84 00:04:48,440 --> 00:04:52,600 How does a, a pastor take those wounds and those offenses and 85 00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:55,280 then turn around when that same person is having craziness in 86 00:04:55,280 --> 00:04:58,240 their life and needs the pastor to go back in and love on them? 87 00:04:58,240 --> 00:05:00,840 Like what? What does it take to do that? 88 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:03,800 Here's the thing. If pastors don't have a really 89 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:06,560 good handle on dealing with wounds, we aren't going to be in 90 00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:09,640 ministry very long. And so today, we're going to 91 00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:12,320 just take a look at this idea of just dealing with hurt. 92 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:14,720 It's that simple. It's just dealing with hurt 93 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:16,480 regardless of where it comes from. 94 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:18,040 And listen, can we all be honest? 95 00:05:18,640 --> 00:05:20,480 It comes from a lot of different places. 96 00:05:22,520 --> 00:05:24,040 Mark Clark says it this way, and I like this. 97 00:05:24,040 --> 00:05:27,160 He says we are hurt by people. We are hurt by injustice. 98 00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:31,120 We live in an ecosystem where people's actions, words, 99 00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:35,440 behavior all matter to more than just them. 100 00:05:36,360 --> 00:05:39,080 Listen, the reason that I know that you've had relational 101 00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:41,040 wounds is because you live with other people. 102 00:05:41,880 --> 00:05:45,240 And we are messy. We can be hurt in a lot of 103 00:05:45,240 --> 00:05:46,560 different ways. But here's the crazy thing. 104 00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:51,880 What you, what we can't do is we can't withdraw from community 105 00:05:51,880 --> 00:05:55,200 and try to wall ourselves off so that no one can hurt us. 106 00:05:55,480 --> 00:05:58,880 And, and there's a couple of you in here today that you got hurt. 107 00:05:58,880 --> 00:06:00,960 And So what you did is you thought, man, if I withdraw 108 00:06:00,960 --> 00:06:04,840 enough, no one can hurt me. But The thing is that you, you 109 00:06:04,840 --> 00:06:06,760 have to risk being hurt in order to love. 110 00:06:07,680 --> 00:06:09,040 That's actually what CS Lewis said. 111 00:06:09,040 --> 00:06:11,720 He said to love at all is to be vulnerable. 112 00:06:12,080 --> 00:06:14,760 Love anything and your heart will be possibly broken. 113 00:06:16,600 --> 00:06:18,280 You can't wall yourself off from risk. 114 00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:21,360 Here's what I'll tell you in pastoral ministry. 115 00:06:21,560 --> 00:06:25,080 If I'm not willing to be hurt, I can't be your pastor. 116 00:06:27,200 --> 00:06:30,000 If I'm not willing to love you, knowing that some of you are 117 00:06:30,000 --> 00:06:32,920 going to break my heart, then I'm not fit for this office. 118 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:36,840 So the solution is not withdrawal. 119 00:06:36,840 --> 00:06:41,000 It's not callousness. It's correctly understanding how 120 00:06:41,400 --> 00:06:43,240 to heal. And so we're going to spend all 121 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:47,560 of our time today on this big idea to fully heal, you must 122 00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:50,520 fully forgive. And if man, all of a sudden 123 00:06:50,520 --> 00:06:51,880 you're like, he just said the F word. 124 00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:57,320 They were listen for service kind of quiet because we started 125 00:06:57,320 --> 00:06:59,200 talking about forgiveness. And I'm not kidding, you people 126 00:06:59,200 --> 00:07:02,880 are like this. And I was like, well, I guess 127 00:07:02,880 --> 00:07:04,440 this isn't an appropriate topic at all. 128 00:07:04,440 --> 00:07:08,200 All right. To fully heal, you must fully 129 00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:09,560 forgive. Let's start with the story of a 130 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:11,800 guy named Joseph. If you're not familiar with the 131 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:14,000 Bible or maybe it's a little bit new to you, there's a guy named 132 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:17,680 Joseph in Genesis 37. His story starts, he's one of 133 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:21,040 twelve sons. He's his dad's favorite. 134 00:07:21,040 --> 00:07:24,600 He's also very arrogant. And at some point he ticks his 135 00:07:24,600 --> 00:07:28,320 brothers off, so much so that they contemplate and begin to 136 00:07:28,320 --> 00:07:30,520 discuss killing him. Now, you thought you had family 137 00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:34,520 drama, but they're murder plotting their brother. 138 00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:40,480 They don't kill him. They only sell him into slavery. 139 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:46,040 Man, I'm not a mystery to my little brother, but I never sold 140 00:07:46,040 --> 00:07:48,000 him into slavery so we're OK there. 141 00:07:49,600 --> 00:07:52,880 He's 17 years old. He ends up in Egypt of a country 142 00:07:52,880 --> 00:07:57,200 next to his adjacent to where he lived and even in slavery God 143 00:07:57,200 --> 00:08:01,000 actually blesses him. He he has God's favor on his 144 00:08:01,000 --> 00:08:06,800 life until in the family that he is a servant, the wife of the 145 00:08:06,800 --> 00:08:10,800 master falsely accuses him of rape and he ends up in prison. 146 00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:16,280 So he's been sold into slavery. He's in a foreign country now 147 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:18,480 he's in prison. He will be in prison. 148 00:08:18,480 --> 00:08:20,880 We don't even know how long somewhere probably between 6 to 149 00:08:20,880 --> 00:08:25,080 12 years. He will be 30 years old by the 150 00:08:25,080 --> 00:08:27,040 time he finally gets released from prison. 151 00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:31,840 With God's help, he will rise to the second in command of all of 152 00:08:31,840 --> 00:08:35,360 Egypt. He answers only to Pharaoh. 153 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:38,600 He is God-given wisdom and and prophecy will end up saving 154 00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:46,400 Egypt from massive famine. And he starts a whole plan for 155 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:48,840 for saving food up for this famine. 156 00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:51,840 In fact, it's so successful that the other countries start to 157 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:56,080 come into Egypt to ask for food. And at some point over 20 years 158 00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:59,480 after he's been sold into slavery, here come his brothers 159 00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:04,080 starving, and their families need food, and they don't even 160 00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:07,400 recognize him. And I just want you to think 161 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:09,720 about this real quick, even if you don't know Joseph's story. 162 00:09:09,880 --> 00:09:13,240 I want you to think about how many days and nights as a slave 163 00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:16,320 Joseph would have thought about his brother's betrayal. 164 00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:19,400 I want you to think about how many nights in a cold prison 165 00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:23,240 cell surrounded by rats and filth and decay, did Joseph sit 166 00:09:23,240 --> 00:09:26,040 there and think about how those who are closest to him or his 167 00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:29,880 abusers. And Joseph ends up saving his 168 00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:32,880 brothers and their families from famine, but they don't believe 169 00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:36,480 that he's fully forgiven them. How could he? 170 00:09:37,080 --> 00:09:40,000 After all they did? So when their dad dies, they 171 00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,960 make up a story about how dad asked Joseph to forgive them. 172 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,520 Nothing like a little lying and manipulation to start off the 173 00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:47,760 relationship, right? Again, right? 174 00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:51,960 We're going to pick up our story in Genesis chapter 50, verse 15. 175 00:09:52,880 --> 00:09:56,440 When Joseph's brothers saw that their father was dead, they said 176 00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:59,680 it may be that Joseph will hate us and pay us back for all the 177 00:09:59,680 --> 00:10:03,440 evil that we did to him. So they sent a message to Joseph 178 00:10:03,440 --> 00:10:06,560 saying, your father gave this command before he died. 179 00:10:06,720 --> 00:10:09,480 Say to Joseph, please forgive the transgression of your 180 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:12,040 brothers and their sin because they did evil to you. 181 00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:15,040 And now please forgive the transgression of the servants of 182 00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:18,040 the God of your father. Joseph wept when they spoke to 183 00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:20,680 him. His brothers also came and fell 184 00:10:20,680 --> 00:10:23,160 down before him and said, behold, we are your servants. 185 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:28,480 But Joseph said to them, do not fear, for am I in the place of 186 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:32,640 God? As for you, you meant evil 187 00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:35,520 against me, but God meant it for good to bring it about. 188 00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:38,360 That many people should be kept alive as they are today. 189 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:42,960 So do not fear, I will provide for you and your little ones. 190 00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:44,920 Thus he comforted them and spoke kindly to them. 191 00:10:45,800 --> 00:10:50,000 Joseph had fully forgiven his brothers and he says 2 really 192 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:51,360 substantial things in that moment. 193 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:53,200 I don't want you to miss this in Genesis 50, if you have your 194 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:54,840 Bibles, I don't want you to underline this. 195 00:10:54,840 --> 00:10:58,040 He says, am I in the place of God? 196 00:10:59,960 --> 00:11:02,920 Oh, that is a, that is a revolutionary thing that Joseph 197 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:04,120 sees here. We'll we'll look at that in a 198 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:05,240 minute. And the second he says this, 199 00:11:05,560 --> 00:11:09,120 what you intended for evil, God used for good. 200 00:11:10,760 --> 00:11:13,360 I want to investigate this idea of am I in the place of God? 201 00:11:13,360 --> 00:11:16,280 Because I think, I think this right here is where we kind of 202 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,800 we go off the rails when we don't understand this when it 203 00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:20,240 comes to healing, when it comes to wounds. 204 00:11:20,240 --> 00:11:23,160 And so here's three ancient truths about wounds. 205 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:25,160 And then we'll kind of investigate that and we'll talk 206 00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,040 about this statement. And I think this will be 207 00:11:27,040 --> 00:11:28,280 helpful. Here's the first. 208 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:32,120 An offense creates debt. It's like, I want to put the 209 00:11:32,120 --> 00:11:35,040 brick in the backpack, right? It creates debt like a weight 210 00:11:36,160 --> 00:11:42,480 and debt demands payment. Someone must pay. 211 00:11:43,640 --> 00:11:45,280 This has always been the truth about debt. 212 00:11:45,280 --> 00:11:47,080 This has always been the truth about offense. 213 00:11:47,680 --> 00:11:50,920 In fact, not only does does an offense create debt, the Bible 214 00:11:50,920 --> 00:11:55,680 would actually say that, that all sin, any sin creates debt. 215 00:11:55,680 --> 00:11:57,200 Now maybe you're new to the Bible and you're like, I don't 216 00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,320 know what this concept of sin is. 217 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:00,520 Here's let me just give you a simple definition of sin. 218 00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:05,440 Sin is anything contrary to God, his character, or His commands. 219 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:09,440 So anything that is contrary to who God is and what He says is 220 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,280 considered sin or rebellion or disobedience. 221 00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:18,680 Sin can be active or passive, so you can send by doing something 222 00:12:18,680 --> 00:12:21,400 wrong, but you can also send by knowing the right thing to do 223 00:12:21,400 --> 00:12:24,880 and not doing it. We can send intentionally or 224 00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:29,680 unintentionally, but all sin creates a debt. 225 00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:34,840 This is what Jesus is explaining when he's teaching his disciples 226 00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:37,440 how to pray, when they say he teaches how to pray and and he 227 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:40,280 he's teaching them the Lord's Prayer and he says in Matthew 6 228 00:12:40,440 --> 00:12:44,480 and he says pray like this, our Father in heaven, hallowed be 229 00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:49,520 your name, your Kingdom come, your will be done as earth, as 230 00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:51,200 it is on earth, as it is in heaven. 231 00:12:51,520 --> 00:12:54,520 Give us this daily, this day, Our Daily Bread and forgive us 232 00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:58,960 our what our what he didn't say forgive us our sins. 233 00:12:58,960 --> 00:13:03,760 He says forgive us our debts as we have also forgiven our 234 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:07,120 debtors. So when we're wounded by an 235 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:11,160 offence, by a sin of someone else, it creates this debt. 236 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:17,760 And that wound, that debt, it needs to be paid. 237 00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:22,320 And anyone who's ever had this happen to them, which is all of 238 00:13:22,320 --> 00:13:26,000 us, say me, we know that it creates a debt. 239 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:27,960 We know that something feels off. 240 00:13:27,960 --> 00:13:31,760 Do you know what I mean by something feeling off as if the 241 00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:34,800 the scales of cosmic justice, right? 242 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:37,960 They're not equal. Something's wrong and it bothers 243 00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:40,520 you, does it not? You that that kind of angsty 244 00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:43,520 feeling of like, right, it's not right. 245 00:13:43,520 --> 00:13:47,520 Something's not right. And so there's this intuitive 246 00:13:47,520 --> 00:13:50,280 feeling that we all share of like someone has to pay this 247 00:13:50,280 --> 00:13:53,800 debt. And listen, if you don't deal 248 00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:56,280 with that wound, it gets infected. 249 00:13:58,040 --> 00:14:00,560 Relational debts have this way of growing. 250 00:14:00,560 --> 00:14:02,360 I don't know if you've experienced this or ever thought 251 00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:06,320 about this. Have you ever had a friend who, 252 00:14:06,320 --> 00:14:08,880 who like bought a used car and got one of those like toxically 253 00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:11,600 bad interest loans? Did you know what I'm talking 254 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:13,600 about? Like 23% APR or something? 255 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,120 I'm like, do do they break your kneecaps if you don't pay? 256 00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:18,600 Like, like that is a bad loan man. 257 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:23,800 Relational wounds are like that. If you don't deal with them, 258 00:14:23,800 --> 00:14:26,120 they compound the debt compounds. 259 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:30,400 The pain compounds so fast and so much over time. 260 00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:31,960 It's like, it's like aggressive interest. 261 00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:34,240 I, I met with a, a, a friend of mine. 262 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:37,200 He used to go to the church years ago and we went out for 263 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,640 coffee and I'm just sitting, we're, we're catching up on 264 00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:41,600 everything. And so I start to press in on 265 00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:44,760 like, why aren't you involved in a local church? 266 00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:47,320 Like, I don't understand why you don't follow the, the biblical 267 00:14:47,320 --> 00:14:49,240 model of Christianity. You, you all know there are no 268 00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:50,800 solo Christians anywhere in the Bible, right? 269 00:14:51,120 --> 00:14:53,200 Like, if you think like, I'm, I'm a Christian, but I don't 270 00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:54,480 need the church. You're just not reading your 271 00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:56,200 Bible. And so I'm pushing on him 272 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:57,960 because he's a friend of mine, so I can kind of poke at him 273 00:14:57,960 --> 00:14:59,560 like, hey, what's going on with this? 274 00:15:01,160 --> 00:15:03,160 You live right next to a bunch of good churches. 275 00:15:03,160 --> 00:15:06,240 Why aren't you doing this? And as I start to press, he 276 00:15:06,240 --> 00:15:08,640 starts to get emotional and then he starts to tear up. 277 00:15:08,920 --> 00:15:11,600 And I'm like, oh, there's a wound. 278 00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:14,840 And I was just sticking my finger in it without even 279 00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:20,320 knowing. And finally it comes out, he has 280 00:15:20,320 --> 00:15:24,640 this hurt that caused him to leave the church six years ago, 281 00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:27,600 and no one knows about it because he didn't tell anyone. 282 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:35,240 Six years ago I was like, bro, you have been hurting for six 283 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:37,040 years and you didn't tell anyone. 284 00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:41,200 He's like, well, I was like, Oh my gosh, see, not only is he in 285 00:15:41,200 --> 00:15:43,640 a, it's not just that he's in the same place that he was. 286 00:15:43,640 --> 00:15:47,560 He's in a worse place now than he was because it's gotten 287 00:15:47,560 --> 00:15:48,960 worse. It's gotten worse and it's 288 00:15:48,960 --> 00:15:56,000 gotten worse. Six years of thinking about it, 289 00:15:56,760 --> 00:16:00,560 of having those fake conversations in your head about 290 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:03,520 it, thinking about how you wish it was different, what you would 291 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:05,560 say the next time. No one's ever done that, right? 292 00:16:07,480 --> 00:16:11,120 And the debt just adds, and the debt just adds, and the debt 293 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:14,280 just adds. See, forgiveness is releasing a 294 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:17,000 debt. Unforgiveness is holding on to 295 00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:20,280 the dead and carrying it, believing that it's owed to us 296 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:23,320 by someone else. But you'll never heal without 297 00:16:23,320 --> 00:16:26,560 forgiveness. To fully heal, you must fully 298 00:16:26,560 --> 00:16:29,080 forgive. And if you think you're healing 299 00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:31,720 without actually forgiving, you're just actually letting an 300 00:16:31,720 --> 00:16:36,640 infected wound scab over. If, if you're visiting today, 301 00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:38,480 maybe Christianity is not your thing. 302 00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:39,640 Maybe you don't even believe in the Bible. 303 00:16:39,640 --> 00:16:42,160 You're like, OK, I, I, maybe you're going to prove this all 304 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:44,320 from the Bible or something. I, I don't even believe that. 305 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:47,080 That's fine. Just consider this. 306 00:16:49,040 --> 00:16:51,720 Medical science has studied forgiveness for a long time. 307 00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:53,600 This is not just a biblical concept. 308 00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:56,640 Like there are fascinating studies on forgiveness. 309 00:16:57,240 --> 00:16:58,800 There's a guy named Doctor Fred Luskin. 310 00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:02,000 He actually runs an entire arm of Stanford University 311 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:05,040 forgiveness projects. They've done the largest study 312 00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:06,880 studies of forgiveness in history. 313 00:17:07,520 --> 00:17:10,599 He has all kinds of John Hopkins medical research has studied 314 00:17:10,599 --> 00:17:12,800 forgiveness. The Journal of Religion and 315 00:17:12,800 --> 00:17:14,359 Health has a ton of data on this. 316 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:18,440 There was actually a logitudinal study done with 50,000 nurses 317 00:17:18,720 --> 00:17:22,400 just looking at forgiveness. And you know what? 318 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:23,760 All of those studies say the same thing. 319 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,480 Here's what they say. They all found that forgiveness 320 00:17:26,480 --> 00:17:29,680 leads to massive benefits physically, mentally, 321 00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:31,400 neurologically, and relationally. 322 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:34,800 And they all point to the negative consequences of 323 00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,240 unforgiveness. Here's the quote. 324 00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:41,760 Unforgiveness creates ongoing physiological stress responses 325 00:17:41,760 --> 00:17:45,360 that prevent complete healing, while forgiveness activates 326 00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:48,680 healing mechanisms in both mind and body. 327 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:54,800 That's not from the Bible. To fully heal, you must fully 328 00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:59,720 forgive. So the goal of our sermon today 329 00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:02,280 is to try to get to some practical implications of like 330 00:18:02,280 --> 00:18:06,440 what would it actually look like to stop carrying this burden to 331 00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:09,800 actually forgive before we we jump over to Jesus. 332 00:18:09,800 --> 00:18:11,600 Jesus is going to talk about forgiveness and we're going to 333 00:18:11,600 --> 00:18:13,560 see what we can learn from what he says about forgiving. 334 00:18:13,560 --> 00:18:15,160 Before we do that, I actually want to start with something 335 00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:16,560 else. I want to start with the five 336 00:18:16,560 --> 00:18:19,640 mistakes with wounds. I want to talk about how we deal 337 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:21,800 with them improperly. And the reason that I want to do 338 00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,040 that is that a lot of times when you're sitting in a sermon like 339 00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:27,160 this, you're like, man, I it's cool that we're here and all, 340 00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:29,240 but I really wish my friend were here because they're dealing 341 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:38,680 with this. Say me, this is for you. 342 00:18:39,840 --> 00:18:42,200 Your friend might also benefit. This is for you. 343 00:18:42,840 --> 00:18:44,440 OK. And I think if you'll if you'll 344 00:18:44,440 --> 00:18:47,400 listen to the mistakes of dealing with wounds, you might 345 00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:50,200 actually find yourself in here. OK, We good. 346 00:18:50,520 --> 00:18:53,440 Don't cross your arms just yet. Got plenty of time for that. 347 00:18:54,480 --> 00:18:56,440 OK, here we go. Mistake number one. 348 00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:01,120 What I do with a wound, I extract the debt from them. 349 00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:05,520 So someone hurts me and I go back and I they owe me a debt 350 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:06,720 now, and I'm going to take it back. 351 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:10,920 We call that revenge. OK, so so here's the problem 352 00:19:11,000 --> 00:19:14,640 with revenge. It turns me into a debt 353 00:19:14,640 --> 00:19:16,720 collector, right? All of a sudden, I'm like Boba 354 00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:18,440 Fett the bounty hunter. Like I'm. 355 00:19:18,640 --> 00:19:20,400 I'm running around. You know what? 356 00:19:20,400 --> 00:19:22,080 It's actually worse than that, though, when you think about it, 357 00:19:22,080 --> 00:19:24,360 because not only am I the collector, but I'm also the 358 00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:27,160 judge and the jury. You notice that. 359 00:19:27,320 --> 00:19:30,280 Like, I've decided how much they owe and I've decided when they 360 00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:32,880 should pay, and I've decided that I'm going to collect it. 361 00:19:34,400 --> 00:19:36,000 Nobody. OK, well, it's just me. 362 00:19:36,080 --> 00:19:36,840 I'm sorry. It's just me. 363 00:19:36,840 --> 00:19:39,240 It's not y'all. Y'all are very holy. 364 00:19:41,360 --> 00:19:44,880 If you've ever sat around and and thought about scenarios in 365 00:19:44,880 --> 00:19:47,640 which other bad, like bad things happen to that person and they 366 00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:53,000 get theirs, what are you doing? You're fantasizing about being a 367 00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:56,680 debt collector. You're thinking about revenge. 368 00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:00,040 And now, now what did Joseph say at the end there? 369 00:20:00,040 --> 00:20:01,680 Because he had fully forgiven. Here's what he said. 370 00:20:01,680 --> 00:20:05,120 He said, Am I in the place of God? 371 00:20:06,080 --> 00:20:09,120 When you decide you're the debt collector, you're saying. 372 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:14,560 I am in the place of God, so I'll go collect my debt. 373 00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:20,280 Mistake number one. Mistake number two, I extract 374 00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:22,880 the debt from others. We call it vindictiveness. 375 00:20:23,120 --> 00:20:25,120 Vindictiveness. Now here's, here's often why 376 00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:28,680 that happens. Maybe I was abused as a child. 377 00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,000 Maybe the person that created the offence is no longer 378 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:32,200 available. They're gone. 379 00:20:32,200 --> 00:20:34,800 Maybe they've passed away. But but the debt is still real 380 00:20:34,880 --> 00:20:37,200 and I'm still carrying it. And since I can't go and collect 381 00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:43,200 it from them, everyone else owes me because someone has to pay 382 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:46,240 this debt. And if you've ever met someone 383 00:20:46,240 --> 00:20:49,080 like this, or if you are someone like this, you begin to, to live 384 00:20:49,080 --> 00:20:53,360 a life in which everyone owes you something because this debt 385 00:20:53,360 --> 00:20:59,200 hasn't been paid yet. And so, so, so the debt has 386 00:20:59,200 --> 00:21:03,480 shifted to the world around you. Mistake number one, I try to 387 00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:06,920 extract it from the offender. Mistake #2 I try to extract the 388 00:21:06,920 --> 00:21:09,600 debt from others. Mistake #3 I ignore the debt. 389 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,400 I just ignore it. It's it's things are going fine. 390 00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:17,640 You know, it's not that heavy. Just going to sneak another one 391 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:19,280 in here. Yeah. 392 00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:20,720 It's good. It's good. 393 00:21:21,280 --> 00:21:26,480 You know, we call that infection and it leads to bitterness. 394 00:21:27,320 --> 00:21:30,840 The the idea that that time heals all wounds is actually a 395 00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:35,040 complete fallacy. Time might numb pain a little 396 00:21:35,040 --> 00:21:38,200 bit, but it doesn't heal the wound for you. 397 00:21:39,600 --> 00:21:41,520 Time numbs pain, but it doesn't heal. 398 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:46,480 Ignoring a wound is a great way to slowly kill yourself, to 399 00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:50,440 slowly kill your joy, to slowly kill your contentment, to slowly 400 00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:54,200 kill your satisfaction, to slowly kill other relationships. 401 00:21:55,600 --> 00:21:59,840 Unforgiveness is like waking up every day and drinking poison 402 00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:01,960 and waiting for the other person to get sick. 403 00:22:07,410 --> 00:22:08,930 I wonder why they're not sick yet. 404 00:22:12,530 --> 00:22:15,800 You can't ignore the dead, you can't extract it from them, you 405 00:22:15,800 --> 00:22:19,280 can't extract it from others, you can't ignore the debt #4 I 406 00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:22,080 identify as the wound. Now that sounds a little tricky. 407 00:22:22,080 --> 00:22:25,520 Some explain, some would call this the victim mentality. 408 00:22:26,120 --> 00:22:27,800 But what? What will happen when I begin to 409 00:22:27,800 --> 00:22:30,560 identify as my wounds? It is. 410 00:22:30,560 --> 00:22:34,040 I start to worship the wounds. Now let me explain before you 411 00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:35,040 go. I don't, I'm not sure I 412 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:38,200 understand that. Look, I highly recommend 413 00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:39,960 Christian counseling and Christian therapist. 414 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,320 Like highly recommend. My wife and I went to a 415 00:22:42,320 --> 00:22:44,200 Christian counsellor last week just to work on our marriage. 416 00:22:44,200 --> 00:22:45,920 Like, Christian counselling is phenomenal. 417 00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:49,840 It's good for so many things. However, be very careful when 418 00:22:49,840 --> 00:22:54,400 you choose a counsellor because simply talking about a wound 419 00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:56,440 does not mean that you're actually working on healing. 420 00:22:58,760 --> 00:23:02,040 In fact, there's a phenomenon where we talk about our wound so 421 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:07,400 much, we focus on that wound so much that over time we begin to 422 00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:11,160 be identified by our wound. So I'm no longer Daniel. 423 00:23:11,440 --> 00:23:14,160 I'm the pastor who was wounded by these people. 424 00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:17,720 I'm no longer Stacey. I'm the woman who was abused as 425 00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:20,320 a child. I'm no longer Jim. 426 00:23:20,440 --> 00:23:22,520 I'm the guy whose spouse cheated on me. 427 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:26,000 And in the moment that you begin to identify as your wound 428 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:30,120 instead of as a child of God, what happens is you actually 429 00:23:30,120 --> 00:23:34,800 begin to worship the the wound you're not even interested in 430 00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:36,080 healing anymore. You don't, you don't, you don't 431 00:23:36,080 --> 00:23:38,840 want to change your identity. That's what you're known by. 432 00:23:39,360 --> 00:23:40,840 And if you're like, no, I don't think I worship the one. 433 00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:43,840 Listen, what? Wherever your identity lies is 434 00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:47,880 your God. Whatever your identity is rooted 435 00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:51,960 in is your God. And so when your identity shifts 436 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:54,760 to become your wounds, it is becoming your God. 437 00:23:58,240 --> 00:24:02,320 How do you know if this is you? Listen, if you are still talking 438 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:06,520 about the same wound that you were talking about last year in 439 00:24:06,520 --> 00:24:11,840 the same way you're talking about it, look out should be a 440 00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:16,160 red flag. But there there is a problem in 441 00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:19,280 your life because the heat that here's not progress in healing. 442 00:24:19,280 --> 00:24:23,160 This is what Tim Keller says about wounds. 443 00:24:23,160 --> 00:24:25,920 He says watch yourself. When someone does something 444 00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:29,360 wrong, watch yourselves because an unforgiven wrong is a root. 445 00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:33,640 It's in your life and it's working its way slowly to your 446 00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:36,960 heart. As long as it's in there, as 447 00:24:36,960 --> 00:24:40,160 long as it's not forgiven, slowly the evil that was done to 448 00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:43,760 you will make you into its own image. 449 00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:47,960 And if you stay bitter, if you stay resentful, even if it's 450 00:24:47,960 --> 00:24:53,000 really pretty far under the surface, forgiveness is both a 451 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:56,160 decision and a journey. So you decide to forgive and 452 00:24:56,160 --> 00:24:58,080 then you're actually going to go on a journey to free. 453 00:24:58,080 --> 00:24:59,560 Like it's going to take time and progress. 454 00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:02,000 It's not quick, but but The thing is, it's like a journey 455 00:25:02,000 --> 00:25:06,840 through a, a bog or a, a swamp, meaning it's, it's slow, but you 456 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:09,080 have to keep moving. If you keep moving, you'll get 457 00:25:09,080 --> 00:25:10,600 there. But if you stop, you'll start to 458 00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:14,720 sink and you'll get stuck. And some of us have gotten stuck 459 00:25:14,720 --> 00:25:19,360 in our wounds for so long that we identify as a wounded person 460 00:25:19,360 --> 00:25:21,120 and really we've begun to worship them. 461 00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:27,800 The 5th mistake is I'll fix it myself. 462 00:25:29,120 --> 00:25:37,080 Self-reliance the old can do attitude that's actually fixing 463 00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:39,040 yourself means you're actually suffering from one of the first 464 00:25:39,040 --> 00:25:42,840 four mistakes and you're lying to yourself because here's the 465 00:25:42,840 --> 00:25:44,480 reality is you you can't fix yourself. 466 00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:51,320 I I can't fix myself. The very first step towards 467 00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:56,520 salvation in Jesus Christ is a realization that I'm broken and 468 00:25:56,520 --> 00:26:01,880 I can't fix the problem so the toughen up buttercup pull myself 469 00:26:01,880 --> 00:26:05,960 up by my own bootstraps sort of that might sound noble, but it's 470 00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:09,640 just a mask. So if you're here, it's actually 471 00:26:09,640 --> 00:26:12,480 just one of the first four and, and, and you're actually, you're 472 00:26:12,480 --> 00:26:15,000 deceiving yourself into thinking that you're going to be tough 473 00:26:15,000 --> 00:26:16,920 enough to just get through it and take care of it. 474 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:21,120 No, it's fine. We're OK. 475 00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:25,120 No problems here. Let's see if this backpack holds 476 00:26:25,120 --> 00:26:30,320 out to the sermon, huh? Let me just say this about 477 00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:35,240 self-reliance, man. self-reliance will get you 478 00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:39,200 killed. I shared with you, I've shared 479 00:26:39,200 --> 00:26:43,240 with you guys a couple times on Sundays, a decision I, I made 480 00:26:43,360 --> 00:26:46,400 last year where I decided I would stop drinking for the rest 481 00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:48,400 of my life. Like I, I just, I'm not going to 482 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:50,400 drink alcohol. The next time I'm going to drink 483 00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:53,240 alcohol is when we're all in heaven at the new feast and the, 484 00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:55,680 the new wine is pouring. And not even the Baptist can be 485 00:26:55,680 --> 00:27:03,520 mad. And, and, and I made that choice 486 00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:06,800 because over and over again, I would find that my consumption 487 00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:10,400 of alcohol just extended a little further than I'd planned, 488 00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:12,480 maybe a little more frequent that I intended. 489 00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:15,240 And so no matter how much self-discipline that I thought I 490 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:20,800 had, and it would creep back into my life, the day that I 491 00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:28,120 realized I was an alcoholic was a gift from God because it made 492 00:27:28,120 --> 00:27:30,040 me realize that I didn't have the control that I thought I 493 00:27:30,040 --> 00:27:33,800 had. And so instead I just said, I 494 00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:36,800 can't, I can't play with this. I've got to cut it out entirely. 495 00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:39,960 And I have to throw myself on the throne of God. 496 00:27:40,520 --> 00:27:42,480 I need, I need God in his community to help me. 497 00:27:42,480 --> 00:27:44,800 And so I was talking to somebody about this actually really 498 00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:48,760 recently in like last week or two, and they said, hey, because 499 00:27:48,840 --> 00:27:49,920 they, they had some similar struggles. 500 00:27:49,920 --> 00:27:51,800 And they go, Hey, how come you're doing so well here? 501 00:27:51,800 --> 00:27:52,920 And I continue to struggle with it. 502 00:27:52,920 --> 00:27:54,800 And I said, listen, I think that they're a good friend of mine. 503 00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:55,720 So I could be really blown with them. 504 00:27:55,720 --> 00:28:00,880 I said, listen, I think the problem that you're having is 505 00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:07,640 that you don't see sin as an apex predator that's trying to 506 00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:11,960 kill you. You think you're strong enough 507 00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:17,200 to win, and I know I'm not, and that's the difference. 508 00:28:18,920 --> 00:28:21,240 Knowing you're weak is a great blessing. 509 00:28:22,960 --> 00:28:27,080 Did you understand in this context, knowing that you need 510 00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:29,520 help to forgive someone is a great blessing. 511 00:28:31,120 --> 00:28:33,040 You're not going to will yourself to it. 512 00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:36,880 If you could, you would have done it already. 513 00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:42,080 All right, those are the the five ways. 514 00:28:42,440 --> 00:28:43,960 Let's see you can fit one more in here. 515 00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:48,640 Those are the five mistakes to make with wounds. 516 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:53,480 Let's talk about how we actually go about healing and see what 517 00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:55,520 Jesus has to say. Grab your Bibles. 518 00:28:55,760 --> 00:28:58,800 Let's turn to Matthew 18. If you have your Bibles, we're 519 00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:03,720 going to start in verse 21 and we're going to look at a 520 00:29:03,720 --> 00:29:06,080 question, an answer, and a story. 521 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:10,760 Here we go, verse 21. Then Peter came up and said to 522 00:29:10,760 --> 00:29:15,120 Jesus, Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I 523 00:29:15,120 --> 00:29:18,920 forgive him? As many as seven times. 524 00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:26,360 Jesus said to him, I do not say 7 times, but 77 times. 525 00:29:27,400 --> 00:29:31,480 Now he's going to tell a story. Listen, if you were a disciple, 526 00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:35,680 every time Jesus told the story, you knew you were about to get 527 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:39,400 slapped upside the head. I'm just saying verse 23. 528 00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:44,360 Therefore, the Kingdom of Heaven may be compared to a king who 529 00:29:44,360 --> 00:29:46,360 wished to settle accounts with his servants. 530 00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:49,840 When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him 531 00:29:49,840 --> 00:29:54,080 10,000 talents. Y'all don't have context for 532 00:29:54,080 --> 00:30:02,400 10,000 talents? Current day market $60 billion, 533 00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:10,160 not million $60 billion versus 25. 534 00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:14,760 And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold 535 00:30:14,960 --> 00:30:18,400 with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to 536 00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:20,320 be made. So the servant fell on his 537 00:30:20,320 --> 00:30:23,120 knees, imploring him. Have patience with me, and I 538 00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:25,560 will pay you everything. And out of pity for him, the 539 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:28,280 master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt. 540 00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:33,440 But when the same servant went out, he found one of his fellow 541 00:30:33,440 --> 00:30:38,160 servants who owed him 100 denarii of five to 10,000 542 00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:41,960 dollars. And seizing him, he began to 543 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:45,520 choke him, saying, Pay what you owe. 544 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:48,400 So his fellow servant fell down and pleaded with him, Have 545 00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:50,920 patience with me, and I will pay you. 546 00:30:53,320 --> 00:30:56,880 He refused and went and put him in prison until he should pay 547 00:30:56,880 --> 00:30:58,160 the debt. When his fellow servants saw 548 00:30:58,160 --> 00:31:00,760 what had taken place, they were greatly distressed, and they 549 00:31:00,760 --> 00:31:03,760 went and reported to their master all that had taken place. 550 00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:07,680 And then his master summoned him and said to him, You wicked 551 00:31:07,760 --> 00:31:12,040 servant, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me 552 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:14,960 it should not. You have had mercy on your 553 00:31:14,960 --> 00:31:17,640 fellow servant as I had mercy on you. 554 00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:21,040 And in anger his master delivered him to the jailers 555 00:31:21,040 --> 00:31:22,360 until he should pay all of his debt. 556 00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:28,400 Verse 35 S Also my heavenly Father will do to everyone of 557 00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:33,440 you if you do not forgive your brother from your heart. 558 00:31:39,600 --> 00:31:41,160 Jesus has a disciple named Peter. 559 00:31:41,160 --> 00:31:43,600 Peter has come and asked Jesus, Hey, how much is too much to 560 00:31:43,600 --> 00:31:45,920 forgive? How often is too often to 561 00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:47,680 forgive? How many times do I have to 562 00:31:47,680 --> 00:31:50,120 forgive? Hey, is there a sin so great 563 00:31:50,120 --> 00:31:51,880 that I can't, I don't have to forgive it? 564 00:31:52,560 --> 00:31:55,120 Is there an offense so great that I don't have to forgive it? 565 00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:57,760 Is there something that someone could do that's so great I could 566 00:31:57,760 --> 00:32:00,160 go, oh, that, that passes the note, that's too much. 567 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:03,160 When Jesus effectively looks right at him and says, no, 568 00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:07,840 there's no sin too great. There's no time too many. 569 00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:12,400 Nothing is off limits for forgiveness. 570 00:32:12,920 --> 00:32:16,200 Now quick caveat for some of you that are starting to cross your 571 00:32:16,200 --> 00:32:19,880 arms, there's a difference between forgiveness and 572 00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:22,960 reconciliation. Forgiveness takes one person, 573 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:28,080 reconciliation takes 2. You may never be reconciled to 574 00:32:28,080 --> 00:32:33,000 someone, but I will tell you this, you cannot reconcile with 575 00:32:33,000 --> 00:32:34,440 someone unless you've first forgiven them. 576 00:32:38,760 --> 00:32:42,720 And when we forgive, we are not enabling or excusing wrong 577 00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:46,080 behaviour. I want you to hear me. 578 00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:49,640 We can name evil and still forgive. 579 00:32:51,360 --> 00:32:56,000 In 1993, Mary Johnson's only son was murdered by 16 year old 580 00:32:56,000 --> 00:32:59,040 Oshea Israel during a party altercation. 581 00:33:00,800 --> 00:33:03,720 After years of anger for losing her only son, Mary met with 582 00:33:03,720 --> 00:33:06,040 Oshea in prison and during that meeting she experienced A 583 00:33:06,040 --> 00:33:07,960 transformative moment. This is a quote from her. 584 00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:11,480 I just hugged the man that murdered my son and I instantly 585 00:33:11,480 --> 00:33:14,000 knew that all that anger and the animosity and all the stuff that 586 00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:17,160 I'd had in my heart for 12 years for you, I knew it was over. 587 00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:21,040 We can name evil and still forgive. 588 00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:25,120 So Jesus has already answered the question, no, there's no 589 00:33:25,120 --> 00:33:27,680 limit to forgiveness. But then he has a whole parable, 590 00:33:27,680 --> 00:33:29,320 whole story. And so I want you to see the 591 00:33:29,320 --> 00:33:31,520 three things that are in this story that I think matter for 592 00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:33,120 you and I, if we're going to learn what it looks like to 593 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:35,440 forgive. Here's the first one, verse 35. 594 00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:40,720 Forgiveness is a command. You see that, right? 595 00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:46,200 Jesus is Lord of Lord and King of kings, and kings don't make 596 00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:51,680 suggestions. He has all authority on heaven 597 00:33:51,680 --> 00:34:00,840 and on earth and he has forgiven us of far more than we will ever 598 00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:04,400 forgive anyone else of that that I love that he picks the sum of 599 00:34:04,400 --> 00:34:08,480 10,000 talents. It's an impossible number, but 600 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:11,639 it's a real number. It's not a made-up number. 601 00:34:11,639 --> 00:34:13,239 You ever had like a 2 year old and you're like, what's the 602 00:34:13,239 --> 00:34:15,800 biggest number you can think of? And they like make terms up 1 603 00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:18,760 billion billion brillion. You're like, that's not another 604 00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:22,360 thing. 10,000 talents is a real number. 605 00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:26,760 It's just impossible. The reason I love that he picks 606 00:34:26,760 --> 00:34:28,600 a real number is because you and I have a real debt. 607 00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:33,040 Every sin that we have ever committed towards someone, we 608 00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:35,360 first committed toward God because in order to commit that 609 00:34:35,360 --> 00:34:37,320 sin, we had to break his commandments to do it. 610 00:34:43,070 --> 00:34:46,190 You know, if you, if you know anything about the, the, the 611 00:34:46,190 --> 00:34:50,190 gospel of Jesus Christ, this this idea that Jesus came for 612 00:34:50,190 --> 00:34:52,710 our salvation. It was it, it really starts with 613 00:34:52,710 --> 00:34:57,200 the idea that Jesus came to earth in order to pay a debt 614 00:34:57,200 --> 00:35:00,080 that was unpayable and impossible for us. 615 00:35:00,440 --> 00:35:02,520 This is what Jesus is foreshadowing in this moment 616 00:35:02,520 --> 00:35:05,200 when he says 10,000 talents is he knows he's going to go to the 617 00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:07,400 cross and he's going to pay a debt that we can't pay. 618 00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:12,920 So, so for those of us that understand that, listen, in the 619 00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:17,960 shadow of that forgiveness, we lose all right to hold on to 620 00:35:17,960 --> 00:35:20,040 debt. Did you understand what I'm 621 00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:23,880 saying? In the shadow of the cross, I 622 00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:26,080 lose all right to hold on to debt. 623 00:35:27,440 --> 00:35:32,960 Say this with me in the shadow of the cross, I lose all right 624 00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:35,720 to hold on to debt. Let's do it again. 625 00:35:36,040 --> 00:35:40,920 In the shadow of the cross, I lose all right to hold on to 626 00:35:40,920 --> 00:35:42,680 debt. Do you understand what he's 627 00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:44,880 saying? You, you cannot stand in the 628 00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:48,440 shadow of such great forgiveness and then hold on to debt. 629 00:35:48,560 --> 00:35:55,040 He's saying, how can you? How can you look at someone else 630 00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:57,600 and think they owe you when you've been forgiven of so much? 631 00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:04,840 It's a command. Secondly, forgiveness is a cure. 632 00:36:05,720 --> 00:36:08,160 In verse 27, he says, and out of pity for him, the master of that 633 00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:10,480 servant released him and forgave him the dead. 634 00:36:10,480 --> 00:36:12,600 Let me ask you a different sort of question. 635 00:36:13,320 --> 00:36:19,160 Do you want to be forgiven? Like if you make a mistake or if 636 00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:21,000 you harm somebody? If you do something, do you want 637 00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:24,120 to be forgiven? Do you want God to forgive you? 638 00:36:24,920 --> 00:36:28,000 Yeah, because forgiveness is a cure. 639 00:36:29,240 --> 00:36:34,000 Our path to salvation was because God forgave us. 640 00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:39,720 The cure to infection of a relational wound is forgiveness. 641 00:36:39,720 --> 00:36:44,080 We forgive not because the other person deserves it, but because 642 00:36:44,160 --> 00:36:47,200 we need it to heal. So not only are we commanded to 643 00:36:47,200 --> 00:36:53,120 do it, it is what heals us. And thirdly, forgiveness is a 644 00:36:53,120 --> 00:36:55,800 characteristic. It's a characteristic. 645 00:36:55,800 --> 00:36:57,520 It's a characteristic of someone who's saved. 646 00:36:58,560 --> 00:37:02,000 Let me show you verse 33. And should not you have had 647 00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:05,360 mercy on your fellow servant as I had mercy on you? 648 00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:07,560 What is he saying? He's saying, listen, you don't 649 00:37:07,560 --> 00:37:09,880 really understand God's forgiveness if you're still 650 00:37:09,880 --> 00:37:15,120 holding on to debt. You don't really understand 651 00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:17,920 forgiveness if you're holding on to unforgiveness. 652 00:37:18,280 --> 00:37:20,440 Debtors. That's you and me, say me. 653 00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:24,440 Debtors should never become collectors. 654 00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:30,760 Think of it this way. I've been forgiven of too much 655 00:37:30,760 --> 00:37:33,520 to be arrogant enough to think I'm still owed something more. 656 00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:39,520 I've been forgiven of too much to be arrogant enough to think 657 00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:43,040 I'm still owed something more. So does command a cure and a 658 00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:46,480 characteristic. Now Jesus essentially explains 659 00:37:46,560 --> 00:37:50,880 that that to truly release the debt of someone that really, 660 00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:53,160 really doesn't deserve it, you're going to need a 661 00:37:53,160 --> 00:37:56,000 perspective that radically changes. 662 00:37:57,280 --> 00:38:02,040 My perspective has to shift from the one where I'm the victim and 663 00:38:02,040 --> 00:38:04,640 they're the perpetrator. I'm innocent and they're guilty. 664 00:38:07,320 --> 00:38:10,680 And it has to shift to the one where I realized that most often 665 00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:12,760 in my life, I am the perpetrator. 666 00:38:12,920 --> 00:38:16,200 I am the guilty one. That's how I rang up a 10,000 667 00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:19,000 talent, $60 billion debt with God. 668 00:38:20,720 --> 00:38:24,440 I have racked up a debt that is impossible for me to pay, and I 669 00:38:24,440 --> 00:38:26,120 deserve punishment for that debt. 670 00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:30,880 In fact, Romans 323 will say that every single one of us has 671 00:38:30,880 --> 00:38:33,960 sinned and the wages of sin is death. 672 00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:41,600 We deserve death. So you thought the debt that 673 00:38:41,600 --> 00:38:46,120 that person owed you was big? But we deserve death. 674 00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:52,200 But God? But God? 675 00:38:55,080 --> 00:39:00,640 But God being rich in mercy because of the great love with 676 00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:04,560 which he loved us even when we were dead in our trespasses, 677 00:39:04,720 --> 00:39:07,680 made us alive together with Christ. 678 00:39:08,120 --> 00:39:15,240 By grace you have been saved, raised up with Him and seated us 679 00:39:15,240 --> 00:39:18,560 with Him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, so that in the 680 00:39:18,560 --> 00:39:23,800 coming ages He might show the immeasurable riches of His grace 681 00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:26,040 and kindness towards us in Christ Jesus. 682 00:39:26,560 --> 00:39:29,800 For by grace, you have been saved through faith, and this is 683 00:39:29,800 --> 00:39:33,080 not your own doing. It is a gift of God. 684 00:39:35,200 --> 00:39:37,760 And if you embrace this perspective, if you have 685 00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:41,240 accepted this, this gift of mercy from God, you will 686 00:39:41,240 --> 00:39:44,520 actually have the perspective and the power to forgive people 687 00:39:46,680 --> 00:39:48,120 in just a minute. I want to, I want to talk about 688 00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:51,000 how to practically go about that when it seems impossible, but I 689 00:39:51,000 --> 00:39:53,560 don't want to leave this moment right here unless I ask you 690 00:39:53,560 --> 00:39:58,640 something. Have you experienced this level 691 00:39:58,640 --> 00:40:00,880 of forgiveness? Do do you understand what it 692 00:40:00,880 --> 00:40:03,120 looked like for God to forgive you? 693 00:40:04,120 --> 00:40:09,640 Do you know Jesus personally? Because you can only partake in 694 00:40:09,640 --> 00:40:13,720 His mercy if you have placed your faith in His finished work 695 00:40:13,720 --> 00:40:17,720 of salvation on the cross. The Bible says that you must 696 00:40:17,720 --> 00:40:19,320 place your faith in Him to be saved. 697 00:40:19,320 --> 00:40:22,920 Romans 10/9 and 10 says it this way because if you confess with 698 00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:26,600 your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that 699 00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:31,200 God raised him from the dead, you will be saved for with the 700 00:40:31,200 --> 00:40:35,280 heart. 1 believes and is justified and with the mouth. 1 701 00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:38,160 confesses and is saved. Do you know Him? 702 00:40:41,720 --> 00:40:45,680 Not, Not have you heard about Him not do you go to church? 703 00:40:46,080 --> 00:40:49,320 Not do you read your Bible? Do you know Him? 704 00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:54,200 Have you given your life to him to rule and to reign over? 705 00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:59,680 And so for just a brief moment, I want to give you a chance, if 706 00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:03,240 you've never done this, to place your faith in Jesus because you 707 00:41:03,240 --> 00:41:06,240 must believe and declare. That's what Romans 10 tells us. 708 00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:08,680 You must believe that you need to be saved. 709 00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:11,440 You must believe that you're in need of a savior because you 710 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:14,400 rebelled against God and therefore have no power to live 711 00:41:15,280 --> 00:41:18,480 perfectly on your own. You must believe that he rose 712 00:41:18,480 --> 00:41:21,560 from the dead in power with the desire to save you. 713 00:41:22,600 --> 00:41:26,000 You must believe that he is God and you must declare. 714 00:41:27,120 --> 00:41:29,400 You must declare him king of your life and Lord over you. 715 00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:33,320 You must declare surrender of your will and your desires to 716 00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:35,840 him who is perfect. You must declare him publicly 717 00:41:35,840 --> 00:41:40,920 and not be ashamed. So if you'd like to surrender 718 00:41:40,920 --> 00:41:43,120 your life to God today, I want to give you that chance. 719 00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:45,600 Would you for just a brief moment, close your eyes and bow 720 00:41:45,600 --> 00:41:48,280 your heads? We're wrapping up. 721 00:41:51,760 --> 00:41:53,960 If you've never done this, if you, if you want to surrender 722 00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:57,000 your life to God today, just quietly or even silently repeat 723 00:41:57,000 --> 00:42:05,000 this prayer after me. Jesus, I know I'm a Sinner and I 724 00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:12,760 can't save myself. I want you to save me and adopt 725 00:42:12,760 --> 00:42:17,920 me into your family. I surrender everything to you, 726 00:42:18,520 --> 00:42:26,040 even my wounds, and I receive your promises of forgiveness, 727 00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:32,440 adoption and eternal life. Be my Lord. 728 00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:38,280 Please Jesus, if you prayed that prayer for the very first time 729 00:42:38,280 --> 00:42:41,200 right now, would you be brave and raise your hand for me to 730 00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:46,800 see? Thank you, thank you can put 731 00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:49,560 your hands down. It's Jesus name, Amen. 732 00:42:53,240 --> 00:42:56,120 If you just gave your life to Jesus for the very first time, 733 00:42:57,040 --> 00:43:05,640 welcome to the family. In a few minutes, as we respond 734 00:43:05,640 --> 00:43:07,960 to the sermon, there's tables in the back, they say. 735 00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:10,280 I raised my hand. We'll have people back there 736 00:43:10,280 --> 00:43:12,320 would love to talk to you and talk about what it looks like to 737 00:43:12,320 --> 00:43:14,280 follow Jesus. We have a gift for you, some 738 00:43:14,280 --> 00:43:16,360 resources. We're excited for you, 739 00:43:18,240 --> 00:43:20,800 practically speaking. What about for the rest of us? 740 00:43:20,800 --> 00:43:23,920 Who, who, who know Jesus? And yet maybe there's someone 741 00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:27,200 that man, we just can't seem to forgive. 742 00:43:28,160 --> 00:43:32,200 It just seems impossible. How do you forgive someone when 743 00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:37,440 it seems impossible? There's a pastor named Pastor 744 00:43:37,440 --> 00:43:39,400 Skip Heitzig. He has this little three-step 745 00:43:39,400 --> 00:43:41,840 process. It's really simple and it's 746 00:43:41,840 --> 00:43:44,920 really hard. It's really simple. 747 00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:49,040 Upward, inward, outward, upward, inward, outward. 748 00:43:49,840 --> 00:43:54,520 Step one, we start upward. You start forgiving somebody by 749 00:43:54,520 --> 00:43:56,760 going to God and praying for them. 750 00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:58,600 And if you're like, I don't want to pray for them. 751 00:43:58,600 --> 00:44:04,000 I know that's why we go to God and pray for them. 752 00:44:04,360 --> 00:44:06,640 Because let me tell you one of the most serious things in the 753 00:44:06,640 --> 00:44:08,920 world. When you're really mad at 754 00:44:08,920 --> 00:44:12,040 somebody, angry or resentful or hurt by them, going into the 755 00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:15,080 throne room of God, into the Lord of the Lord and the King of 756 00:44:15,080 --> 00:44:17,600 kings who created this universe into his throne room and 757 00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:21,160 speaking their name to him will begin to change. 758 00:44:21,160 --> 00:44:25,760 You begin to change your heart, and that's what needs changing. 759 00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:28,600 And so every day we're going to get up, we're going to go back 760 00:44:28,600 --> 00:44:30,280 to God and we're going to pray for them. 761 00:44:30,280 --> 00:44:32,280 And we're going to pray for their blessing and we're going 762 00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:34,200 to pray for their repentance. And we're going to pray for 763 00:44:34,200 --> 00:44:36,320 their salvation. And we're going to pray good on 764 00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:42,360 their life. And in that time with the Lord, 765 00:44:42,360 --> 00:44:45,400 we're actually going to focus on how much we've been forgiven of 766 00:44:45,560 --> 00:44:49,440 so that we can remember the perspective of what he's done 767 00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:52,720 for us so we don't become the servant who's been forgiven. 768 00:44:52,720 --> 00:44:55,600 10,000 talents and wants to choke somebody out for a couple 769 00:44:55,600 --> 00:45:00,720 Denarii going to start upward and then we're going to move 770 00:45:00,720 --> 00:45:04,080 inward. We're going to look inward. 771 00:45:07,400 --> 00:45:10,520 The first thing is you're not going to wait until you want to 772 00:45:10,520 --> 00:45:13,480 forgive that person. It's going to be a long wait. 773 00:45:13,480 --> 00:45:16,840 You're going to make a decision to forgive. 774 00:45:17,000 --> 00:45:19,200 When you make a decision to forgive, it's actually just the 775 00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:23,120 start of a long journey, and you're going to start that 776 00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:25,520 process and you're just one foot in the other in front of the 777 00:45:25,520 --> 00:45:28,080 other, like as God does this work. 778 00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:31,840 Forgiveness is sometimes 1° at a time, and it takes time. 779 00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:33,320 But the main thing is you don't stop. 780 00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:36,320 Because if you stop, you get stuck and you start to sink. 781 00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:40,520 And in those moments when resentment and bitterness begins 782 00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:42,920 to bubble back up in our lives, we remember that I made a 783 00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:48,760 decision to forgive that person. It's much the same when when you 784 00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:50,600 love someone. Yeah, there might be these 785 00:45:50,600 --> 00:45:53,000 moments where you fall in love with them, but a lot of the 786 00:45:53,000 --> 00:45:55,080 moments of loving someone are really hard. 787 00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:57,320 We make a decision to love them even when our emotions don't 788 00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:57,960 match. Amen. 789 00:45:58,960 --> 00:46:00,960 The same thing goes forgiving people. 790 00:46:04,080 --> 00:46:06,040 We're getting acknowledge that it's a long journey. 791 00:46:07,640 --> 00:46:11,760 And we remember that we're also a perpetrator, not just a 792 00:46:11,760 --> 00:46:15,040 victim. And then thirdly, we're going to 793 00:46:15,040 --> 00:46:16,560 reach outward. We're going to go to that 794 00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:20,920 person, if possible, to tell them we forgive them. 795 00:46:22,840 --> 00:46:25,280 And listen. Reconciliation may not be 796 00:46:25,280 --> 00:46:29,520 possible because forgiveness takes one person, but 797 00:46:29,520 --> 00:46:32,840 reconciliation takes 2. But even when reconciliation is 798 00:46:32,840 --> 00:46:40,960 not possible, peace is possible. Even if that person isn't 799 00:46:40,960 --> 00:46:45,680 remorseful, even if that person hasn't earned it, peace is 800 00:46:45,680 --> 00:46:49,400 possible. So today I'm going to ask you to 801 00:46:49,400 --> 00:46:52,800 make a commitment. The person, the conflict that 802 00:46:52,800 --> 00:46:56,080 has been bubbling up all service long, you've been trying to not 803 00:46:56,080 --> 00:46:57,800 cross your arms, but you really want to. 804 00:46:59,400 --> 00:47:01,920 I want you to make a commitment to pray for them Today. 805 00:47:03,800 --> 00:47:06,440 I want you to make a commitment that you're going to forgive 806 00:47:06,440 --> 00:47:08,640 them, which means you're going to start a long journey. 807 00:47:10,360 --> 00:47:13,120 But let me explain why you need to do it. 808 00:47:15,760 --> 00:47:18,840 In Matthew 11 when Jesus explains what it's going to be 809 00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:21,040 like to put your faith in him, he says this. 810 00:47:21,280 --> 00:47:25,280 He says come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I 811 00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:28,680 will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn 812 00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:32,360 from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart and you will find 813 00:47:32,360 --> 00:47:37,240 rest for your souls. Jesus is not simply telling you 814 00:47:38,120 --> 00:47:43,360 that His guidance is going to be gentle and it's going to be 815 00:47:44,160 --> 00:47:46,200 freeing. He is telling you that. 816 00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:51,760 But you'll notice He's also telling you that you come to Him 817 00:47:51,760 --> 00:47:55,160 heavy laden. Where does all that debt go? 818 00:47:56,080 --> 00:47:57,920 Where does all that heavy burden go? 819 00:47:58,600 --> 00:48:03,880 He wants you to give it to Him. Some of us in the room have come 820 00:48:03,880 --> 00:48:07,520 to Christ, but we refuse to give him the burden that he asked 821 00:48:07,520 --> 00:48:09,680 for. And we've wondered now for a 822 00:48:09,680 --> 00:48:12,960 while, why has why has life felt so difficult? 823 00:48:12,960 --> 00:48:17,480 Why have things changed? And, and because you actually 824 00:48:17,480 --> 00:48:22,120 have to give him the burden. So we choose to forgive today 825 00:48:22,120 --> 00:48:25,240 and let Jesus carry the burdens in our story. 826 00:48:25,240 --> 00:48:27,520 Joseph said something in that original story that's really 827 00:48:27,520 --> 00:48:31,160 profound. He said what you intended for 828 00:48:31,160 --> 00:48:37,080 evil, God used for good. Guys, if you will give over all 829 00:48:37,080 --> 00:48:40,360 those wounds to God, he will start using them for good. 830 00:48:41,040 --> 00:48:44,440 I promise you. That debt requires a payment, 831 00:48:45,240 --> 00:48:49,960 but Jesus already made that payment on the cross, and you're 832 00:48:49,960 --> 00:48:52,480 carrying around something he already paid for. 833 00:48:55,160 --> 00:49:00,320 If you'll give it to him, you'll find that life with Jesus is a 834 00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:04,760 lot more freeing, a lot easier than you thought it was. 835 00:49:06,480 --> 00:49:10,560 Will you give it to him today? Stand with us. 836 00:49:10,560 --> 00:49:12,560 We're going to close in song. Our prayer team is going to come 837 00:49:12,560 --> 00:49:13,600 up. We would love to pray with you 838 00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:15,800 about anything, whether it's about forgiveness, whether it's 839 00:49:15,800 --> 00:49:17,600 about your health, whether it's about anything that's going on 840 00:49:17,600 --> 00:49:19,800 in your life. We love the opportunity to pray 841 00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:22,160 for you and with you. And so our prayer team will be 842 00:49:22,160 --> 00:49:24,880 here. You guys move as the Lord leads. 843 00:49:24,880 --> 00:49:25,560 We love you guys.