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Welcome to the new manager 
podcast. 

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I'm your host, Kim nickel. 
Hello. 

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I hope you're having an amazing 
day and you know what? 

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If you're not, that's okay too, 
because some days are just like 

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that. 
So, welcome. 

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And today I want to share with 
you, the support and Authority 

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map. 
It's a framework that I use to 

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really organize all of the 
different soft skills that you 

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need as a Leader and 
specifically, as a manager. 

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Once you move into that role 
where you're now managing 

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humans, you need both a 
combination of self-awareness of

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communication. 
We talked about that in an 

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earlier episode because that's 
what gives you the ability to 

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build the most effective 
relationships with the people 

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that you work with. 
It's both the combination of 

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your own self awareness, as 
well, as how do. 

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You relate with and communicate 
to other people. 

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So that work gets done in the 
most easeful and most productive

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and effective way. 
So the support and Authority 

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map, most of the time when I 
teach this and if you've been in

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my class you've seen I have this
really nice grid with boxes and 

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colors but since this is a 
podcast, I will just do my best 

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to describe to you what this is.
All right? 

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So Have two elements, we have 
support, and we have authority. 

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And if you create a map with 
these two elements, you end up 

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with four boxes support from low
to high and Authority from low 

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to high and I want to clarify. 
Also that when I talk about 

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Authority, what I mean is the 
quality that you have of Setting

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the tone of declaring, this is 
what is happening, or this is 

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what the deadline is, or this is
what is required in the same way

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that you author or are 
authentic. 

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This sense of the one who is 
creating the clarity around 

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something. 
So when I use Authority, it's 

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not from a sense of overpowering
or being a bully or trying to 

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exert your will against people. 
So if that's what you're 

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thinking, I want you to have a 
different perspective. 

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So think of authority in terms 
of author, authenticity, the 

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sense of bringing Clarity and 
direction to whatever it is that

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you're engaging with, or 
presented with and then we have 

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support. 
So, in one cot, quadrant we have

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high support, low Authority, in 
another. 

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We have low support, low 
Authority, Then we have low 

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support, High Authority, and 
finally High support High 

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Authority. 
And it's important to understand

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that these four areas are 
places. 

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It's more about where you are. 
These are not two types. 

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So this is not who you are. 
It really is a place that you 

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can be, and depending on what's 
going on in your day or in your 

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life. 
Or with your team, you can visit

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any one of these Trent's, you 
can visit any one of these 

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places, it will just depend on 
the day. 

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So let me explain what. 
Each one of these places are the

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different qualities and 
characteristics of being in each

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place. 
And then I'll tell you about how

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this works, when you're 
engaging, with other people and 

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how this shows up at work. 
So let's start with high support

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low Authority. 
This looks like the person who 

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has a high priority on keeping 
the The piece being friends with

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everyone. 
This is where we go when we're 

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avoiding confrontation and also 
hard decisions and we tend to 

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have difficulty standing up for 
our team but also standing up 

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for our self. 
So we're so focused on making 

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sure everyone's feeling okay and
everyone's feeling good and if 

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you're a person who growing up 
in your world if that's the way 

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that you tended to deal. 
Stress. 

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Or when you're under pressure, 
you were the Peacekeeper or the 

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one who wanted to just. 
I'll be really nice and I'll 

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deescalate things and make sure 
everybody gets along. 

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Then that might be the place 
where you tend to go. 

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So that's high, support, low 
Authority. 

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Next, we have low support, low 
Authority, and that's where we 

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are, when we're distant or 
distracted. 

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This engaged when we are in 
avoidance, or we overextend 

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ourselves and become 
unavailable. 

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And that's also where we don't 
give any guidance or mentoring. 

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And sometimes I've seen this 
come up in class when when one 

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of my students will say I was 
promoted to this. 

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Cereal. 
Roll and I keep going to my boss

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for guidance and mentoring and 
they just don't have any for me.

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They just say, I trust you go do
it. 

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And I feel like I'm thrown in 
the deep end and I'd really like

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a little bit more mentoring 
here. 

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And so what can happen when it 
shows up is it can either be, 

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you know, a vote of confidence. 
Like yeah I trust you go figure 

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this out and meanwhile, you're 
thinking I'm in AI. 

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Feel like I'm in a little over 
my head and I would I would be 

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better off with a little Little 
bit more guidance here or it's 

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the person who has so many other
things going on and they're so 

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distracted. 
And so busy, this might be when 

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if you've ever had a boss or a 
person you work with and they 

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continually continually 
rescheduled your one-on-ones and

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maybe you're supposed to meet 
every week or every other week 

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and you think look it's been six
weeks and you keep pushing off 

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this meeting and so you're 
feeling adrift your Saying like 

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you don't have any guidance, you
feel like the you know, the 

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least important person on this 
person's to do list and you're 

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thinking like, you know, how am 
I supposed to move things 

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forward or learn more about 
what's going on? 

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If I can't you know sit down and
have this conversation with you.

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So that's low support low 
Authority and typically if we're

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in that space, it's because we 
also have learned that when 

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things get a little hectic or 
things, get kind of tense. 

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The best thing to do is just get
out of town, make yourself busy 

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doing something else, and things
will sort themselves out, and 

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then you can come back when 
things are more steady and then 

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just do your thing. 
So, for some of us, that is the 

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most familiar way to deal with 
high stress, high pressure 

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situations and especially with a
high-stress relationships as 

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well. 
Now we have low support, High 

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Authority. 
And that's where we put a high 

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priority on the work and we 
forget about the humans doing 

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the work, that's where we get 
really controlling and 

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inflexible. 
And that's also where 

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micromanaging shows up and very 
often, you know, when we go 

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here, it's because we have a 
familiarity that when things get

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Intense, when I feel pressure, 
or when I feel stress. 

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I think, if only I can exert, my
will, if only, I can control 

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what is happening and control 
these people, I can make things 

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be okay. 
That's the also, the perspective

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of I am, the person who has the 
most experience. 

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You need to do things my way, or
I am the one who sees the 

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correct solution or path, your 
job is to get in line and do it.

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I'm telling you to do. 
Do sometimes to that shows up 

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when people are feeling insecure
if they're worried that, oh my 

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gosh. 
If I don't, if I don't, you 

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know, if my team doesn't get 
this right, I'm afraid it will 

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look badly on me and so I'm 
going to push into the team. 

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Here's what needs to happen and 
it has to happen in exactly this

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way without regard for the human
element without regard for 

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communicating the bigger picture
or we're you're presenting what?

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Required from a place of feeling
secretly scared. 

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The sense of. 
I really hope I don't blow this.

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This is super important. 
It has to go this certain way. 

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And again, none of these places 
are bad places to be. 

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None of these styles of relating
with people are bad things in 

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and of themselves. 
They're just very human and very

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familiar. 
And what we tend to do is 

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humans, is we tend to bring, you
know, hey, this worked for me in

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the past, I'll bring this with 
me. 

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Me into this new situation or 
into the future. 

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So, when you start to see and 
notice where are you, where do 

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you tend to go? 
What, what is your pattern when 

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you feel under stress? 
Do you try to control everything

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and everyone do you tend to 
disengage and get avoidant and 

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just wait for things to cool 
off. 

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Do you tend to think? 
Oh, if I can just be really, 

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really nice to everybody and 
make sure everybody is happy. 

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Then things will be. 
Okay? 

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Notice for you, what your 
tendency is because that will 

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then help you to learn. 
Okay? 

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So I need to bring up more of 
this other aspect. 

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If you're a person who tends to 
be high support low Authority, 

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then your growth area and your 
challenge is going to be around.

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How can I bring more Authority 
into the way that I communicate 

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and Lead my team? 
How can I be more? 

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Decisive, how can I have 
challenging or difficult or 

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uncomfortable conversations, how
can I protect my teen, how can I

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stand up for them? 
How can I ask for what I need or

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what the team needs in order to 
succeed? 

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Those will be the kinds of 
questions that you'll ask on the

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opposite end of the spectrum. 
If you're a low support High 

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Authority than your challenge 
and your growth area will be 

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around the question of how can I
be more supportive? 

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How can I bring more human 
perspective to my team? 

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And I'll tell you that one gets 
very tricky if you're working 

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with a lot of people and 
especially if you are working 

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very remotely. 
If you don't have a lot of in 

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person contact and your only 
communicating through video, 

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through messaging, through the 
written word, it can be harder 

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to feel a real human connection.
Ian and one example that I want 

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to share from a student who had 
taken this when we talked about 

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low support High Authority, she 
said, oh my gosh, that's me. 

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And I said, like, tell me more. 
What how do you mean? 

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And she said well I right now 
and based in San Francisco, but 

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I'm managing this project and 
we're doing this work force 

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training in Manila and I only 
get out to the Philippines. 

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Maybe once a quarter to meet 
with the people with everybody 

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in person, And there are 50 
people in our office in Manila, 

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that I'm trying to train up and 
get them on up to speed on this 

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new workflow. 
And I'm so focused on the task 

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and the deadlines and what needs
to happen when and there are so 

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many of them and they're so far 
away. 

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And we've got time zone 
challenges. 

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She said, I don't know how to 
connect with them as humans. 

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I think of them as like work 
units. 

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Need to execute on certain tasks
within a certain time. 

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And so for her it really brought
up this question of. 

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Okay, so what does this look 
like? 

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How can I acknowledge that? 
Yeah they are humans too. 

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Some of this is probably 
stressful and uncomfortable for 

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them to how can I bring more 
support? 

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Because just being focused from 
the authoritative spot isn't 

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going to be the most effective 
way to manage. 

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And to lead. 
Now the last place that we have 

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to talk about is high support 
and high Authority. 

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And what I found is that most of
us and most of the students that

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come to my class, we don't exist
in that in that Dimension 

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without a little bit of effort. 
Because most of us have one of 

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those first three spaces that we
feel most comfortable in that we

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feel most familiar in, and we 
have to do a little bit of work,

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too. 
In ourselves into a place of 

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high support and high Authority.
So here's what that looks like. 

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When we are in the place of high
support and high Authority, 

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that's when we can be clear kind
and direct with others, we are 

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being skillful in giving 
direction and corrective 

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feedback and that's where we can
effectively advocate for our 

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team. 
And for our self and this tends 

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to build trust because it's 
really the least secretly 

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manipulative style of the others
because you're being direct. 

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But you're doing it from a place
of kindness and being clear and 

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that doesn't mean you have to 
have all the answers or know 

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everything that also means that 
if you don't know or if 

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something seems like it's not 
going well you're not trying to 

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hide it either with niceness or 
with blame or with frustration. 

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And that you simply say, okay, 
this isn't working and we need 

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to find a way to fix this. 
I don't have all the answers, 

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but help me understand what's 
going on. 

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We can figure this out together.
I don't have all the answers, 

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but I can start to talk to other
people and figure out what we're

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going to need to do. 
I can listen, I can learn. 

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I'm here to help you. 
Let's figure this out so high 

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support and high Authority is a 
fantastic place to go. 

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Go because it does build trust, 
but you have to have both that 

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measure of self awareness and 
communication and play. 

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When you have those two things 
and are continuing to develop 

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that, it makes it a lot easier 
to step into high support, High 

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Authority. 
Okay. 

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Now, the great thing is that 
when you begin to understand for

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yourself, where you tend to go, 
most often, Where you tend to 

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go. 
Most often again, it's not like 

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who you are as a person. 
It's where you tend to go. 

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It's built on your habits. 
Your patterns, the things that 

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have worked in the past, you 
learn, where you tend to go as a

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person and then you realize, oh,
yes everyone. 

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I work with also has a place on 
the map. 

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That is most familiar to them 
where they tend to go. 

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So different people on Team 
different people at work will 

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also respond differently because
they'll need different kinds of 

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communication and they'll need 
something slightly different 

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from you. 
So some of your team will need 

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more Authority, they'll want 
more clarity. 

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They'll think you look, I don't 
need to be your friend. 

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I just want clarity about what 
it is that I need to do. 

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And what's expected of me, and I
want to be acknowledged for when

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I do that. 
They want maybe more Authority 

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from you. 
Some people will Really want to 

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feel support they'll want to 
feel cared for as a human that 

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want to feel recognized that 
they're dealing with challenges 

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and that you know they'll want 
that emotional connection to 

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what they're doing. 
They'll want maybe the high 

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level Vision to understand why 
this feels so important or if 

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they're struggling they'll want 
a feeling of of perhaps empathy 

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like I get it. 
I know this is hard and here's 

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how we're going to move forward.
So depending And who you're 

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working with? 
It will help you to learn. 

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How can you be flexible and 
adapt so that you can get your 

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team. 
What they need in order to 

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perform their best. 
And one of the other pieces to 

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this is you really will need 
great listening skills. 

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So again, coming back to 
communication and self 

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awareness, self awareness and 
listening come into play when 

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you realize. 
Okay, there there is more here 

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than I understand. 
And I want, Understand more and 

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it's okay that I don't know 
everything. 

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I'm not supposed to know 
everything and the communication

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comes in when you realize that a
huge part of communication is 

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listening, Can you listen in a 
way that builds trust? 

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Can you listen in a way that 
invites your team or someone 

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that you work with, to open up 
and say, okay, this is really 

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what's getting in the way right 
now. 

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The way that you listen can help
everything and can really make 

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you more effective in working 
with the other humans that you 

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have. 
At work. 

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So that is the support and 
Authority map and I know there's

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a lot more to talk about with 
respect to this and some of it 

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too will depend a lot on the 
particular situation that you're

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facing. 
So if you're not officially 

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managing people but you really 
need to manage more by 

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influence. 
And this might be, I've had 

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students and they say, well, I 
manage our volunteers and so I'm

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not their boss. 
But I essentially have to manage

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their work and make sure that 
they show up and make sure that 

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they do it in this correct way. 
You know, that will look a 

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little bit different than if you
are directly managing a handful 

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of people or you maybe even just
one person who is in your office

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and you see them everyday and 
you you can build a different 

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kind of relationship with 
someone that you are under the 

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same roof with, but I want you 
to start thinking about for 

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yourself which of these Places 
feels most familiar to you. 

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Hi, support low Authority, low 
support, low Authority or low 

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support High Authority. 
And then, what does it look like

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to cultivate and bring up 
whatever it is. 

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That'll get you into a high 
support, High Authority place, 

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and it might be related to 
specific people. 

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There might be certain people, 
you work with, and they just 

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create a response in you that 
She wanted to be very 

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controlling or make you become 
very appeasing or make you want 

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to check out. 
So be aware in your own world. 

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Who are the people? 
What are the situations like 

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what is the map look like in 
your world? 

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And then also begin to consider.
Okay. 

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What is it? 
That other people need to work 

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best and if you don't know, ask 
In your one-on-ones or in your 

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conversations with the people 
that you work with you can ask 

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and say hey I would love to 
know. 

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00:20:22,200 --> 00:20:25,600
Maybe I've never asked this 
before but how do you best like 

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to work? 
Tell me about the best manager 

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00:20:28,700 --> 00:20:32,700
you ever had what was great 
about that person and again you 

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00:20:32,700 --> 00:20:36,200
know you're not promising that 
you can be that best person. 

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But you want to listen and 
understand and be open to 

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getting a better sense of what 
is it that this person needs to 

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work well. 
Because we're different, you 

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00:20:45,300 --> 00:20:48,200
know, we're human and, you know,
it can change. 

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So maybe what worked best last 
year or last month is a little 

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00:20:53,200 --> 00:20:55,500
bit different than what they 
need. 

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00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:59,800
In this particular situation, 
it's more important to be 

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00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:04,400
present and fluid and adaptable 
than to be absolutely rigid and 

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00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:07,400
unchanging and feel like you 
have to know everything. 

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00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:12,400
So hopefully that comes as a 
relief and a little bit of good 

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00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:14,800
news. 
So that is the support and 

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00:21:14,800 --> 00:21:17,300
Authority map. 
I hope that has been helpful. 

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00:21:17,300 --> 00:21:19,700
If you have questions about it, 
please let me know. 

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00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:22,000
If you're listening through 
anchor you can leave me a 

324
00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:26,100
message or you can always just 
reach me through my website or 

325
00:21:26,100 --> 00:21:28,800
through Linkedin. 
Thanks so much for listening. 

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00:21:33,900 --> 00:21:37,600
If you know it's time to level 
less but you feel your 

327
00:21:37,600 --> 00:21:42,000
perfectionism Self Doubt and 
uncertainty getting in the way 

328
00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:45,900
then come work with me. 
We'll have six months of 

329
00:21:45,900 --> 00:21:50,000
one-on-one coaching and it all 
starts by going to my website. 

330
00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:57,200
Kim nickel.com coaching and 
joining my waitlist talk to you 

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00:21:57,200 --> 00:21:57,800
soon.