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Welcome to the new Manager 
podcast. 

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I'm your host, Kim Nichol. 
Hello and welcome. 

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I'm glad you're here and I hope 
you're doing well. 

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If you listened to last week, 
you know that I was feeling a 

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bit under the weather and I'm 
happy to share. 

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I am feeling so much better. 
I took a lot of naps. 

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I reduced my my schedule so I 
was able to have time for more 

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rest so my body could recover. 
And one of the things that 

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really stood out to me in that 
time was just noticing my brain 

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did not work so good. 
And it was a, you know, it was a

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common cold. 
So it wasn't anything, you know,

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devastating. 
It was, it was simply a cold, 

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but truly I, I really noticed 
that it was so much more 

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difficult to think. 
I didn't have as much energy. 

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I just wasn't able to be as 
present and able to be creative 

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and responsive and generative in
my thinking. 

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And when I was facing decision 
points or, you know, puzzles to 

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solve, and it really brought to 
mind how important it is to have

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the mind state that allows you 
to access all of your inherent 

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creativity and perspective and 
all of these wonderful qualities

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that you're bringing into your 
role and that you're bringing 

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into the workplace. 
Because if you're not able to 

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access them, then it's kind of 
like they're just, you know, 

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books on the shelf that aren't, 
that aren't being read and 

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aren't being used to enhance 
your experience. 

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It makes everything so much 
harder. 

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And as I was reflecting on this,
there are three things that 

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really came to mind, what I 
think about what makes it easier

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to bring the best of who you are
into the workplace. 

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And also when you're learning 
something new and as a manager, 

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especially as a new manager or 
as a manager who's trying to do 

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things in a new way, there are 
three things that will make all 

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of that more effective and 
happen more easily. 

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So number one, time you want to 
choose to take the time to learn

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the new thing. 
And this is important that 

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you're being very deliberate 
here because your brain wants to

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do what it knows how to do. 
And especially if you're feeling

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under pressure to make things 
happen, to get things done, the 

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internal, you know, dialogue 
will sound something like, but I

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don't have time and it will feel
very true and very convincing. 

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And so we put off the, you know,
the deliberate time to learn a 

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new skill or to learn a new 
perspective or to do things 

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differently. 
Because when we're feeling that 

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urgency and that anxiety, it's 
so easy to continue to do things

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the way you have done them in 
the past or the way that that 

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you know how to do already. 
And that is what can keep us 

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stuck in a pattern of recurrent 
frustrations and not feeling 

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like we're making a lot of 
progress. 

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It's funny too, because when we 
are in any kind of avoidance or 

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resistance about the discomfort 
of taking the time to do or 

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learn something new at what I 
noticed in my own brain is that 

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my internal dialogue offered me 
two thoughts. 

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One was I don't have time, so 
that's an easy one. 

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When I feel like I don't have 
time, like off, I don't have 

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time. 
There's no time for that, and I 

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put it off. 
But the other thought, which was

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more interesting is the thought 
I have plenty of time. 

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Since I have so much time, I 
don't need to do that now. 

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I have plenty of time. 
I can do that later. 

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There's something more urgent or
there's something more 

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interesting or there's just 
something I would rather do 

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instead. 
And that internal resistance. 

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Resistance is so tricky. 
Like your brain is so clever and

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it can clever yourself into a 
pattern that no longer serves or

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into the avoidance of something 
that you know, OK, I really do 

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need to take a step back and, 
you know, do the high level 

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thinking. 
I need to take a step back and 

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do some strategic planning. 
I need to take a step back and 

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learn this new skill, or take a 
step back to develop this 

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relationship, or take a new 
perspective and learn a new 

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approach. 
It's so tricky that when we have

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any kind of resistance, and very
often it's around the discomfort

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of learning something new or the
discomfort of feeling like it'll

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take so long, What's the point? 
Your brain can very effectively 

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give you lots of logical reasons
for why to not do a thing. 

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So it's important that if you 
choose to take the time, another

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way to think of it is you are 
choosing how to allocate your 

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time and to be really clear with
yourself that there will always 

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be more things on the To Do List
than are kind of humanly 

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possible to do in a day. 
You know, or like in, in, in 

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life, there, there are literally
more things to do than you ever 

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could do. 
That's not a problem we're 

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trying to solve. 
What we're actually trying to 

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solve for is knowing that this 
is. 

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So how will you choose to 
allocate your time and how will 

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you need to grow your skill and 
maybe your willingness to be 

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uncomfortable? 
Either setting a boundary, being

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willing to disappoint someone, 
being willing to not be the hero

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and instead of trying to do all 
of it and save the day and save 

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everybody else instead. 
Perhaps the skill it's time to 

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to develop is the skill of. 
I am going to make a decision 

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about how I allocate this time 
in a different way and I might 

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need to communicate differently 
to other folks. 

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I might need to make peace in my
own self and stop being hard on 

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myself for who I think I'm 
letting down because I'm taking 

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this time and it's so important 
that I choose to do this 

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anyways. 
So that's number one when we're 

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thinking about how to make it 
easier to learn and how do we 

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make it easier to access that 
really creative, generative, 

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resourceful part. 
Choosing to take time and being 

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aware, being mindful of how are 
you making decisions about that.

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The second thing that becomes 
really important is a feeling of

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safety. 
And the way I think about this 

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when we have it internally #1 
it's a sense of freedom from 

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judgement. 
If you have any perfectionist 

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tendencies, then you have an 
internal perspective where 

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you're going to be very vigilant
about judging yourself against 

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some standard of perfection that
may or may not actually be 

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possible to attain. 
But it might just be always this

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feeling of never good enough, 
never as perfect as you'd like 

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it to be, or judging yourself in
comparison to someone else who's

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a more advanced practitioner. 
You know, it's, it's kind of 

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like when you're learning to 
play guitar for the first time 

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and you compare yourself to 
Taylor Swift, who's been playing

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guitar, you know, for decades, 
since she was a kid. 

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And you feel like, I can't do 
this. 

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I'm just, I'm just not that 
good. 

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You might be comparing yourself 
in a way that doesn't make a lot

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of sense for the stage that 
you're at and actually just 

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shuts you down. 
So if you don't feel safe, if 

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you don't feel freedom from 
being judged internally, then 

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it's going to make it harder to 
learn and to try new things. 

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Also, if you're in an 
environment where you're 

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constantly being judged and 
criticized, that will create 

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this internal hyper vigilance 
where you're thinking I need to 

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be extra sure of every single 
thing that I do and say. 

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It's that feeling when you're 
walking on egg shells because 

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you don't feel safe with what 
you're doing. 

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You're feeling super hyper 
vigilant and that's that fear of

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being judged, criticized, or 
just that sense like something 

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bad will happen. 
I feel like I'm always being 

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watched and judged, so I don't 
feel safe. 

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And that hyper vigilance can 
kind of obstruct or get in the 

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way of that creative thinking, 
that generative thinking, that 

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willingness to try things. 
When we feel more safe, we tend 

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to feel more curious, we feel 
more open, more willing. 

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We can take things less 
personally when we're feeling a 

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bit more safe internally. 
And the safety one is an 

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interesting one because there 
are the internal aspects. 

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So the voice you use to talk to 
yourself if it's one that's 

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highly judgmental. 
And there's also the external 

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aspects of safety. 
That's about the professional 

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environment that you work in, 
that's about your relationship 

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to your direct manager and your 
colleagues. 

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That's related to the, you know,
perhaps the even the bigger 

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situation of your specific 
industry. 

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Different industries go through 
different stages where it can be

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more unstable and more 
uncertainty can be happening. 

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And there might be a sense of is
this organization going to 

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weather the storm? 
And that can also undermine that

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feeling of safety and reduce 
your willingness to be curious, 

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take a risk and try new things. 
So be aware of where your 

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internal feeling of safety is 
and just start to, you know, key

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in like where's your hyper 
vigilance? 

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Is it super up or does it vary? 
Because if it's very high, that 

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will get in the way of your 
ability to learn effectively and

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tap into all of that brilliance 
you have. 

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The third thing that will help 
you is simplicity. 

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So when we are feeling 
overwhelmed, overloaded, there's

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so much we can get lost in all 
of those different things that 

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are on the To Do List or that 
are on the plate, or we can feel

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overwhelmed and overcome by the 
complexity or by the competing 

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timelines. 
When you start to feel that way 

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and you start to get into the 
either the freeze, like kind of 

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get paralyzed in the face of all
of the different things, or you 

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start to feel discouraged, like,
oh, it's an impossible task. 

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I'm totally overwhelmed by the 
complexity here. 

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What will help you is to find 
the simplicity. 

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How can we look at this in a way
that reduces the overwhelm? 

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How can we find the simplicity 
this the, the simple doable 

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perspective or approach or the 
thing you can do that can help 

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get you unstuck, unfrozen and in
motion? 

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One practice that can be very 
helpful is to simply like 

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organize something in your 
physical space. 

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Because if you're feeling 
overwhelmed looking at the 

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screen and all of the messages 
or projects or things that are 

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happening in there, you want to 
start to activate your physical 

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body. 
It can help to both dis like 

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dissipate the stress and the 
physical freeze that we feel 

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when we get anxious and tense 
and our muscles all sort of 

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tense up. 
And it can also just help 

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organize, like by organizing 
your external world, it can help

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your internal world start to get
a little bit more organized as 

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well, right? 
That feeling of accomplishment 

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that you get when you, you know,
just like put things where they 

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need to be. 
Whether it's organizing files on

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the desk, putting cups into the 
kitchen, checking to make sure 

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that the pens you have on your 
desk actually work, that you 

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don't have any that have run out
of ink and that are just taking 

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up space. 
When we start to find the 

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simplicity, it allows us to 
access a sense of capability, a 

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sense of forward momentum. 
It starts to bring a little more

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ease and a little more breath 
into the moment. 

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And that can help you start to 
find that calm and relax into 

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that perspective of, OK, what is
it that's here before me? 

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What, what is the approach I 
want to take? 

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It can help make it easier for 
you to think through what your 

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options are and how you want to 
approach this. 

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It's kind of like just by 
shifting it, you know, shifting 

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things a little bit, you start 
to see something new and it can 

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actually create this lovely sort
of, you know, organizing 

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perspective where instead of 
feeling overwhelmed, you're 

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like, yeah, there's a lot. 
But I, I have a sense now of 

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where I want to begin. 
And I have a sense of where 

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things are in relationship to 
each other. 

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I am clear about where I can 
start and what is it that I do 

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not need to give my attention to
in this moment. 

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And so these three things, 
having time by choosing it, 

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creating that sense of safety on
the inside and looking for the 

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simplicity, how can you simplify
things? 

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All of that will help to shift 
you from a state of the 

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overwhelm, the hyper vigilance 
and the continuing to grind 

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through in a way that doesn't 
advance your learning, right? 

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Kind of keeps you stuck in the 
same place. 

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It can help you to learn a new 
approach, tap into your own 

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creativity, generativity, your 
own best thinking, your own best

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self, and it can help to get you
unstuck and out of that 

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overwhelm. 
So those are some ideas I wanted

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to share with you today as you 
go into your week. 

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If this is something you want 
more of, like you want to learn 

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more of this for yourself as a 
practice, then that's something 

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we can work on in private 
coaching. 

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So go to my website to learn how
to connect with me about that. 

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And I've also started to get a 
lot more inquiries for team off 

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sites and team building, which 
is actually very exciting. 

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It's for the first time in like 
4 years if you like. 

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Everything is starting to 
activate again. 

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So if you have a team off site 
or you're looking for a team 

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building experience and you want
something that will help people 

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to connect, to get grounded, to 
practice being mindful and to 

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think about how do we want to 
work together, then reach out to

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me for that because that's 
something that I can offer to 

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you. 
And if you're looking to learn 

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in a more kind of community 
based experience, then come take

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my class that starts on 
September 17th. 

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I'll put a link to the show 
notes. 

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I'll put a link to that in the 
show notes for you. 

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And that is a seven week course.
The focus there is on 

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communication strategies. 
And what you'll get is in 

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addition to the communication 
strategies, the way I've 

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designed it is so that you have 
time to learn these things so 

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that you have a safe place in 
which to learn them. 

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So you're not learning them in 
front of all of your colleagues 

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and peers. 
In fact, you get to step away 

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from that, into this virtual 
classroom and start to feel more

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safe, to learn, to ask questions
and to let go of some of that 

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hyper vigilance and that 
judgment. 

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And I'll help to simplify things
so it makes it easier for you to

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learn them, to do them, to gain 
the confidence as you apply 

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these concepts and tools and 
strategies in your actual 

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workplace. 
Basically, I'm telling you, I'm 

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here to help. 
And I love that you're listening

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to this show because this is an 
excellent resource for you. 

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And if you want more, there are 
a few options for how that can 

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work. 
All right, thank you so much for

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listening. 
I hope you have a great week, 

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and I will talk to you next 
time. 

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When you're more effective at 
work, you're happier in your 

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life. 
And when you're happier in your 

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life, you're more effective at 
work. 

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I can help. 
Go to my website, kimnickel.com 

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and sign up for a coaching 
consult. 

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It can get better.