Welcome to the new manager podcast.
I'm your host, Kim nickel. Hello and welcome.
I'm glad you're here, and I hope you're doing well today, I
wanted to start with a celebration of my client, Aaron.
We have been working together this year, and when we started
one of the main things, she wanted help with was
overwhelmed. She had a lot happening, both in
her family, and in her work life, and she initially came to
me, wanting help. Up with time management and
prioritizing things and just dealing with the overwhelm of
life and work and being a human. And what's so lovely is that in
our most recent call, because we were reflecting on the work that
we've been doing over the course of the last several months.
She said, Kim, you know, I am not overwhelmed anymore.
Something has shifted. I'm a different person and what
came up as she was observing and sharing this with me, is that
she actually didn't need help with time management.
She really needed help with mind management and thinking about
relationships and what was most important and some of the
different assumptions that she had about herself and her
projects and how things needed to be.
And so, by managing her mind, which is what we do in coaching
and by helping her, to manage her energy.
The result is the overwhelmed dissipates, and she said, I'm
still able to get a lot done, but it feels easier.
It doesn't feel so heavy, and it doesn't feel like I have to,
like, force things to happen. It feels like things are just
flowing. A lot more easily.
And, you know, she was telling me about being able to be
responsive to different challenges, and different
people, rather than feeling like she needed to have all the
answers or kind of control things, when things seemed
uncertain. And so, I was just really
appreciating her and the sharing that she had to let to give to
me. And I wanted to pass that along
to you because I think it also highlighted Did that.
We sometimes think if we're overwhelmed or for anxious, or
if we're feeling like there's just a lot going on, we
sometimes think it's a time management issue.
When really, it's a mind management and an energy
management issue, what are we putting our attention and energy
into what is draining our energy and especially how are we
thinking about this situation? What is our perspective?
What is the story were telling about ourselves about other
people. All of that will inform the
decisions that you make about your time and the way that you
get things done. So that is where we wanted to
start today. Now, my main topic that I wanted
to dive into you with today is the topic of managing High
performers This is come up in a few of my conversations with
clients over the last month or so.
And the question of when you are managing people and you have
someone on your team, who's a really high performer, sometimes
that can be difficult. Oddly enough to know how do I
manage them appropriately or correctly?
Or am I doing a good job? This person seems to be doing
great. Is that okay if I don't know
what to do with them? Or a feeling of this person on
my team is doing such a good job and it makes me doubt myself.
Who am I to be managing? This person who is so good at
what they do and I don't know what my role is.
So I thought it would be a good idea to take some time today to
talk about what is it like when you are managing a top
performer? A high-performing person on your
team. So here are a couple of things
to start with. There are three things that I
think of, as kind of pitfalls that you want to be aware that
you don't fall into. So, one is, when you have a
really strong performing person, you might simply neglect them.
One of the things you might think is, oh, they'll be fine.
They don't need me. They're so good at what they do.
They are doing great. And that can lead you to neglect
them to overlook them and to not have conversations about what
they need, how they're doing, and helping them to think beyond
the current moment and engage them in a conversation about
what their desire or Vision or growth path is so be mindful
that you're not overlooking or neglecting them because they're
doing a good job. Instead you want to think how do
I stay connected? I want to think of my role as
their manager, not as the person who is, you know, who is, who is
better than them at the thing they do or as in my role, as a
manager as the person who helps them to get better at the thing
that they're not good at and if they're good at everything, then
I have nothing to do instead. Think of it as, oh, my role is
to stay. Connected to this person on my
team and to help them grow. And to have a sense of what it
is that they want. Maybe they're in a place where
they're actually very content, they love what they're doing or
they might be in a place where they're feeling a little bit
impatient or a little sense of restlessness.
You want to have a sense of how they're doing, because that will
Be very helpful to you in your role as the manager and as the
the person who has a sense of the entire team.
The other thing to watch out for is your self-doubt or
insecurity, might flare up, you might go into a little
comparison, you might think. Gosh, they know so much more
than me. They're so good at what they do.
I don't know why I'm their manager.
They should probably be managing me.
I actually have had a client tell me that before that they
had someone on their team who was so solid.
She felt uncertain of what her role was as a manager.
So remember the manager's job is not to be the person who knows
the most right? It's not to be the best at the
thing. Really.
When you're in this role of being a manager, think of it
like this, your role is to make decisions that lead to the
desired. outcomes that you have for the team or, you know, to
make decisions that help support the growth and well-being of the
people, the team, the organization, the mission,
ideally all these things roll up and align together so it's okay
if people on your team have more experience if they have more
education, if they have more expertise in the area all of
That is fine because your role is to be someone who can make
decisions to support the achievement of desired outcomes
and sometimes too because of your position, you will have
access to other kinds of information.
In the organization that will inform the decisions that get
made around the work. Your team is doing around how
you direct their time and attention.
And energy. And so it's it's a different job
than having the job of doing the thing.
So be really mindful if you feel your self-doubt flare up, or if
you start to feel insecure, just beyond to yourself and remind
yourself. Hey, like your job is not to be
best at everything. That is not what the job of
managing people is so much of the job of managing people is
around decision-making. It's around.
Friendship building. It's around being the person who
can help create the focus through prioritization or
through communicating or through, you know, shielding
your team. It's so much of this other
relational skill set. That's your role.
That's the job. The other thing to watch out
for, as a manager is over Reliance and not wanting them to
leave. And that kind of sounds like
this person can't go like, please don't go.
We rely so much because this person is a top performer and if
you have a really unbalanced team, or if you have a team
where someone is really strong at what they do, and others are
not either, because they just don't perform at the same level
or they might be newer, to the role or to the company.
And so they're still learning how it all works.
Or if One on your team has gone through a significant life event
that is pulling their attention and energy away.
So for example, if they are Caregivers for elderly parents
and there's been some kind of challenge with that.
If they have kids like new parents, are not getting a lot
of sleep and so they're going to feel like you're going to need
to offer a little more grace to Them the space to adapt to?
What does it mean to perform at a high level when you're not
getting so much sleep at night? Like, it's going to look
different. It's going to change or there
might be something else going on in the life of this person, that
influences the way that they're showing up.
So, when you have a person who's performing really well and
you're noticing for yourself like, oh gosh, you can't go just
be aware. R, if you are over relying on
that person to make up for some other, you know, challenges or
unevenness on the team because you don't want to put so much of
a burden on one person. And also, you don't want to kind
of get in the way of this person growing and continuing to feel
supported, And who they are and what their career trajectory is.
So, for example, I had a client who gosh, this was years ago and
she came to me, worried and confused because she said, I
have been performing at a really high level.
I have really great performance reviews.
My manager says, I'm doing really great work and I'm not
getting to getting promoted and I don't know why, I don't know
what else I need to be doing in order to prove that I'm ready
for this promotion. and one of the things that we talked about
was the possibility that her manager would rather keep her
because it would require the work of finding someone new to
come in and do her job and that always takes time and energy and
then like training somebody up, was it possible that her manager
was reluctant to let her go because Would turn into more
work for that manager. And if that manager was not
comfortable or not familiar with hiring like how to do that if
they were really busy with other things, they might simply not
have given the thought or the attention to, if I'm letting go
of this really top performer, then that means that I'll have
to take on the work of filling that role and getting somebody
new plugged in I think Think that's the kind of thing
especially when you have a really good relationship with
your team. It can be easy to overlook that
because it seems like but we get along so well, everything's
going great. Why would they want to leave?
Sometimes people have ambition that goes beyond where they
currently are? So you just want to be again
onto yourself especially if you're feeling really busy like
you have no time to hire and bring somebody new on you I want
to notice if that is what is happening and that's the way
that you're managing this person.
If you're managing with the intention of keeping them,
rather, than having conversations around where their
growth is what's next for them, how that fits within the
organization, what you see, as possible or what their next
strengths or next step is in terms of growing as, you know,
in their own leadership and in, Their own skills.
So, as the manager, those are three things to watch for
neglect, your own self-doubt or insecurity, flaring up, and
maybe an unconscious Reliance on this person and a reluctance, to
let them go. Now, in terms of having a very
top performer, there are two specific behaviors that I wanted
to mention, to keep an eye out for because We'll have to
address them. One is this might be a person
who becomes very frustrated and impatient and they might come to
you saying, when am I getting promoted?
I've been doing great. I've gotten all of these
performance reviews that really high rankings.
When am I getting promoted? So you'll want to have a
conversation that is clear act like clarifying how promotions
happen and you that like that means you're going to need to
know how that works in your Ation, if you have a very
complex organization where promotions are a very, like
bureaucratic, very complex process, you'll want to
understand that so that you can communicate and help this
person. See, here's how that process
works. If you're in a very flat
organization, you may have a conversation about that to they
might be ready for a promotion. But there might not be any place
to promote them up into and Other thing to understand is
that performing your work at a high level, is not necessarily
what it takes to get a promotion in a specially.
I think this can be tricky if we don't understand this, because
for a lot of us, especially if you are a high achiever in
school, the way School works, is you perform at a high level and
you get promoted. You go to the next level.
You go to the next Next grade, but the workplace is a little
different. You might perform at a high
level within that job function but that doesn't mean you
automatically get rewarded with a promotion or a raise.
It's a different situation often.
What you'll need to do is say, okay, here is the promotion or
the role that I want, or here's the Rays that I want and then
you have to present your case for why?
That should be And you will want to have a conversation in
advance to signal to people, okay?
If I complete these things, if I perform at this level, if I
demonstrate that, I have the skills for X y&z, if I create
these kinds of results will that turn into a promotion or a
raise, like this is my intention.
Are we in agreement that that this is the path that will
create? Eight that different
conversation and I know for me when I first came into the
professional work, world that wasn't clear to me.
I still kind of thought it was like school where you do a
really good job. People notice they say great
job. Here's your performance review.
You did great. And I just kind of thought it
would happen automatically, like you've been performing at this
level and now you get rewarded by a promotion or a raise turns
out. It doesn't work like that.
So you're People on your team, might not understand that and so
then they might feel frustrated, they might feel impatient and it
can help when you're able to clarify.
Oh, here's how the process works, right?
Like. Oh yes.
Like, here's how I can help you with that.
The other thing you want to keep an eye out for is if you have
someone who seems like, they're depending on you for guidance,
and this might be someone Who's really eager to grow but they
don't have a clear idea of what that looks like.
So they come to you and they say something like, okay, like
what's next? What else have you got?
And here what you're wanting to do is to think a little bit
more, like manager as coach where you're helping to coach
them into really holding their career path, taking full
responsibility for that, and helping them think through, what
does the next step look like for them?
And they might not know at first, which is.
Okay, so part of the coaching is about helping them.
Think through what is it that they want, what are the
projects? They've loved the most.
Where what do they want to do more of?
What do they want to do? Less of, is there someone in the
organization that is kind of a role model of what they want to
do next are their skills, they will need to develop.
Now in order to get to where they want to go, so you can help
them I'm think through and in the course of doing that it will
help them to take more active responsibility for their career
journey and what they want rather than coming to you.
And saying, well, you're my manager, and you've seen how I
work, tell me what I should do next.
Because also, even if you've been in their manager, you don't
know all of the things they've done.
And even if you did at one point, you might forget, right?
Because people Forgetful, there's a lot going on and you
always want to refocus the intention and the energy around
helping them to drive their career forward.
If they come in, they're asking you know, help me understand
what else is possible. You can share, what you see but
ultimately you want to help them.
Think through what do they want? How do they know what can they
They do to start coming to you saying something like, you know
what, I'm really interested in the recruiting part of our
business because I'd really love for us to, you know, bring on
like a more diverse slate of candidates.
Or I really want to challenge us as an organization to expand our
recruiting, not to just people with this kind of background,
but I think it could be really valuable to also open up our
recruiting Direction, Include folks here.
And I would love to be a part of that, right?
Like you might not know that, that's a thing that they're
interested in, but having them come to you saying, I'm really
interested in how this thing works that can then help you
coach them to meet people in that part of the organization
think through. OK.
What are you going to need to learn or grow in order to be
able to participate more in that like you can partner with them
but they're still really Really owning that part for themselves,
if that makes sense. So that is what I wanted to
share with you. It's awesome.
When you have really high performers but sometimes it can
feel stressful either because of, you know, the reasons I
mentioned earlier feeling like you don't know what to do with
them or if they're feeling a little Restless or they're
looking to you for guidance and you're like, I don't know what
to tell you, I think you're amazing and I don't know what
you should do next, right? Remember what your role is your
role is to facilitate great outcomes.
Your Role is to make decisions to help nurture growth to bring
the best out of people and help them.
To also step into new levels of responsibility and really take
on the work of driving their own career growth.
And those conversations can be a whole lot of fun.
So that is What I wanted to share with you today, if you
want one-on-one support with your work and the way that you
manage people, whether or not you have direct reports because
honestly client management managing up managing
cross-functional Partnerships if you're a product manager and you
have to make things happen by managing people even though you
do not have direct reports, it is all related and I would love
to help you with that so you can go into the show notes.
As you'll see a link to book, a consult on my calendar and we
can talk about it. All right, that's what I have
for you today. I hope you have a great one and
I'll talk to you next time. Hey before you go if you like
this podcast please leave a review.
Tell me why you listen and what has helped you?
Thanks so much. I'll see you next time.