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Welcome to the new manager 
podcast. 

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I'm your host, Kim nickel. 
Hello and welcome. 

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I'm glad you're here. 
And I hope you're doing well 

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today. 
I wanted to remind you that even

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when you begin to feel more 
confident, it doesn't mean that 

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you have absolute certainty that
you can control the outcome that

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you want to have. 
Meaning, you might still feel 

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some self-doubt or you might 
still feel uncertain about, you 

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know, whether either the thing 
you're about to do is going to 

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work, but when you are able to 
tap into this more grounded 

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sense of confidence that 
includes the Curiosity of, I'm 

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curious to know what might come 
of this. 

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That makes all the difference in
the world because what I see a 

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lot of is this internal thought 
of what's the point and if 

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you've ever had that thought, 
what's the point? 

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It can kind of trick you into 
Giving up early into not 

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following through to find out 
what's actually possible. 

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It's kind of a defensive 
mechanism. 

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What's the point then? 
I won't even ask for something. 

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That way, I won't have to feel 
disappointed. 

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If I don't try, then I won't 
fail and then I don't have to 

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feel like I failed this internal
thought. 

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It's so simple. 
What's the point? 

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Especially if you've had prior 
experiences that didn't go. 

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Oh, the way you are hoping. 
What's the point? 

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It just sounds logical and it 
can lead you into not speaking 

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up. 
So one of the things that I 

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really want to encourage you to 
think about is, where can you 

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number one recognize, when that 
thought comes up and choose to 

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go forward? 
Anyways, from the place of 

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curiosity. 
So the thought of what's the 

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point. 
If I asked for this, I don't 

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think it's in the budget. 
I don't think Say yes, but I 

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wonder what might happen I'm 
going to ask. 

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Anyways, that Curiosity can help
to get you past that little gate

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of what's the point. 
And this is so valuable to know 

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because one of the things that 
may happen as you continue to 

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rise and grow in your career and
as you become more visible and 

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gain more responsibility, as a 
Manager and as a leader, it can 

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feel riskier. 
Like there's more at stake if 

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something doesn't go the way you
want or the other thing I see, 

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sometimes is this thought of 
well, now that I'm in this 

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position of responsibility and 
this position of leadership, I 

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really need to have a handle on 
everything. 

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I don't want to ask for support,
I don't want to ask for other 

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things I just I need to make it 
work with what I have and so we 

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end up kind of inadvertently 
Access to options because you've

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decided in advance that the 
option isn't available to you. 

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And there are two specific 
situations that made me think of

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this today that I wanted to 
share with you one is someone 

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who had reached out to me for 
coaching and because so much of 

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the work I do directly affects 
the work that you do in your 

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workplace. 
I'll often ask. 

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Are you going? 
Are you planning to pay for this

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yourself? 
Or is this part of your 

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professional development? 
Development budget because that 

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affects, you know, sometimes how
we think about the logistics of 

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how it all plays out. 
And this person said, well I 

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really want my work to pay for 
it but I don't think it's in the

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budget. 
And so why coached her on the 

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call about? 
How are you going to approach 

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it? 
What is your thinking? 

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What's your approach? 
How are you planning to raise 

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this topic and make the ask and 
she shared with me? 

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And I said, I have an idea for a
slightly different It approach. 

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Can I share that with you? 
She said, sure. 

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And so I told her and she's 
like, oh I can see how that's a 

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little bit different. 
Okay, that makes sense. 

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And she wrote back to me 
recently and said I was very 

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surprised, but I actually 
presented this to my supervisor 

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and they've decided to 
completely support me 100% And 

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they're going to fund me and 
sponsor me to work with you. 

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I love that. 
I love that. 

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So much. 
So that was the first story. 

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Is that even if you think oh I 
don't know that it's available. 

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You still want to ask from that 
place of curiosity because that 

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may get you a resource that was 
there. 

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If only you had asked and I 
think sometimes what we do is we

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try to feel it out beforehand. 
Like we might say Hey you know 

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how much budget do we have 
available? 

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You know, just it was thinking 
just wanted to know Try to be 

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really casual about it rather 
than saying there's this coach, 

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I want to work with she cost 
this much. 

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What can we do? 
What budget do we have for this 

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when we approached it? 
Instead of kind of this open, 

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you know, Vago just wondering 
super casual versus being really

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specific and clear this is what 
I want and why I've done some 

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research listen to her podcast, 
it really has helped. 

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I would love to work with her 
one-on-one. 

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This is how it works. 
What can we do that tends to 

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convey a lot? 
More sense of Readiness and 

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Leadership and taking full 
responsibility. 

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And all of those qualities are 
really positive to signal to 

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your supervisor. 
So there was that story and then

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the other one is from someone 
who was in my group program 

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earlier this year and she sent 
me an update that she had gotten

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promoted, which is awesome. 
It was one of the things that we

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had talked about and coached on 
when we were in our group. 

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And what's so cool is that Said 
they had initially offered her a

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ten percent increase, which is 
great, but it was still below 

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her goal and so she negotiated 
and was able to get them to 

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about 14% And she's also 
eligible for a raise later this 

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year during the annual review 
period. 

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And she said, this is a much 
better deal than the last time 

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when, you know, something 
different happened. 

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And I mentioned that because it 
is amazing to know. 

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Even though in the past things 
went one way in the future, 

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things can go a different way, 
we don't always know, but we 

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tend to assume that what 
happened before is what will 

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happen again and so then that 
inner voice comes up. 

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What's the point? 
Should I even ask? 

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They'll probably say no last 
time I asked this is what 

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happened. 
We want to be able to identify 

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that voice and be like, oh, 
that's my Internal self-doubt or

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that's the internal part of me 
that is trying to prevent me 

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from feeling disappointed or 
feeling, let down so that we can

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then move past that tap into the
Curiosity of. 

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I wonder what will happen if I 
wonder if I go for it they might

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say yes that would be wild. 
That could happen and I 

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especially love practicing this 
around, professional development

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and learning. 
Earning because it's often an 

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area where even if you're not in
an active conversation about 

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your professional development 
budget, it's not a weird thing 

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to bring up your manager. 
Your workplace. 

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Someone is already thinking 
about this. 

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If not for you specifically, 
understanding the concept as a 

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whole for the organization, even
if it's a start-up, and there's 

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not a formal policy Let's see, 
the idea of professional 

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development is not an unusual or
strange thing. 

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You might be the first person to
raise that question. 

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Hey, I know we haven't talked 
about professional development 

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but I found this Workshop. 
I want to take or I found a 

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certification, I want to do or I
found a program or a conference 

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or a coach, like, I found 
something that will make me 

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better at the job that I'm doing
and it tends to signal. 

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That you're taking lots of 
responsibility for your own 

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Career Development and growth. 
That's a good thing. 

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If you're coming with already a 
specific idea of what you want, 

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it makes it easier for the 
person making that decision to 

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say, yes and to evaluate because
you know, you're not asking them

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to do all of this research. 
You're saying, oh I found this 

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thing, this is how it works. 
What do you think? 

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And what's really cool is, I've 
seen this work even after 

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someone has Paid for something. 
So last year I was working with 

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a client and there was a 
continuing education class that 

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she signed up for and she didn't
tell her work about it. 

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She thought, I'll just sign up 
for this class on, you know, 

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economic sustainability and 
development and she's like, oh I

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think it'll really help me with 
my work, but I just, I really 

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want to take it. 
So she just signed up and after 

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we had worked together, she had 
the idea of I wonder if my work 

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would pay for this. 
I wonder if they would 

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reimburse. 
Verse me for taking this class. 

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And so she went back to her 
manager and said, you know, I've

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been taking this class, you 
know, this this continuing 

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education on this topic. 
I think it'll really help me 

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with the work that we're doing. 
What's our reimbursement policy 

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for professional development? 
Is this something that I could 

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get reimbursed for? 
And it turns out her manager. 

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Said yes, she said, oh, that's a
great idea. 

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Isn't that great? 
So, It's really it's really 

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wonderful is just this awareness
that, you know, even if you've 

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already gone ahead and paid for 
something because you didn't 

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think that it was possible to 
get reimbursed or you, weren't 

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sure if your work would be on 
board, it's still possible to 

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raise the question and to make 
that ask. 

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And so if you have that thought 
of, oh, what's the point? 

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Like, I already am have taken 
this class, I already paid for 

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it. 
Myself, you still might be able 

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to get reimbursed. 
And even if they say, no, you're

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still conveying. 
All of these other really 

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positive qualities about being 
very invested in yourself and 

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being committed in your career 
and being engaged in the topic. 

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And again, all of these are 
positive things. 

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And I mentioned that this now 
too, because we're coming into 

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the middle of the year, which 
for some of you means you're 

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coming to the end of the fiscal 
year. 

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And so, budgets may be resetting
Come, you know July for some of 

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you you might be coming into the
middle of your year so this is 

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the time to check in say is it, 
you know, what are you doing? 

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And your professional 
development, sometimes that 

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falls by the wayside because we 
get so busy in what's happening 

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day to day. 
So you want to pause and just 

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take a look and reevaluate, 
okay? 

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Like what is it that will help 
you now based on what you know 

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about who you are and where you 
are and what you do and And 

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where you want to go in terms of
your Learning and Development 

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and Leadership, and manager 
skills. 

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It's also great to think about 
this mid-year, because you're 

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also thinking about like, what 
is the budget? 

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We still have available and 
actually, as I mentioned that to

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if July is when your fiscal year
ends, you might be looking at 

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four more weeks to use whatever 
budget is left. 

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So there might be a Are you 
willing you know, approvals 

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process? 
If you're looking at like oh we 

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didn't use all of the budget 
that we had for our professional

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development. 
We need to actually use those 

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dollars if they were set aside. 
So you know, it's a good time of

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year for so many reasons to 
pause and check in with yourself

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with your budget with your team 
to think about what is the 

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Learning and Development that 
you want and how to ask for it. 

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What school to is that this 
skill Kill of noticing what it 

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is that you need, what it is 
that you want the willingness to

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ask for it to make it easy for 
someone to say, yes, to you that

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skill set, you will use in a lot
of other situations. 

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What's nice is that this is 
such, I think of it as a much 

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easier, place to practice it. 
You don't want to wait until 

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things are extremely serious or 
dire or Are heavy. 

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And as I mentioned before, 
Learning and Development tends 

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to be an area that is top of 
mind and normalized. 

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And it's like, not a weird thing
to talk about or to ask for and 

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you start to build that muscle 
of identifying what you want, 

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how to ask for it. 
How to think about it, in a way 

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that makes it easy for the other
person to say. 

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Yes. 
So that you can just move 

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forward and all of these, I 
mean, these are also leadership 

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skills. 
Eels, but we learn to apply them

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to yourself first because that's
often a place that we tend to 

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overlook. 
Especially if you're very 

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service oriented, especially if 
you're very, you know, 

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mission-driven, it's easier to 
focus more on the mission than 

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on yourself. 
So that is what I wanted to 

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share with you today. 
The idea of noticing when you 

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hear that voice inside that 
says, what's the point? 

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That will inhibit you that will 
keep you from making an ask from

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for advocating for yourself. 
Oh and kind of one adjacent 

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thought to. 
So I've been teaching about 

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self-advocacy speaking up for 
yourself and also around 

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boundaries. 
So the gentle know and how to 

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say no to things they're very 
closely connected. 

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They're two sides of the same 
coin or two facets of the same 

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Jewel if you will Sometimes that
same thought. 

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What's the point? 
Also pops up when I'm teaching 

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and coaching around boundaries, 
people will say, ah, what's the 

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point? 
You know? 

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I, I have to, I have to overwork
because, X y&z or what's the 

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point? 
I don't think I can set a 

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boundary with this person 
because of the power Dynamic. 

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I just don't think it will work.
Or what's the point, you know? 

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They're just going to kind of 
keep interrupting me and nothing

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I do can get them to change. 
What's the point? 

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We To address that same kind of 
mindset there too because that 

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will also prevent you from 
developing. 

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The skill of communicating, 
clearly of having great 

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boundaries of working with 
different kinds of people and 

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personalities. 
It's always easy to work with 

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people that are just like you 
that think the same way that 

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have the same motivations. 
But when we are working with 

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someone who has a very different
perspective and Worldview and 

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has motivated by different kinds
of things. 

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It can feel sometimes, very 
perplexing and kind of 

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confusing. 
Like why is this communication 

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not working? 
Why are they saying yes? 

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They understand and then they 
are not changing their behavior.

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Like I thought we talked about 
this what why is this? 

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Why is this still happening or 
why is this not happening? 

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That is when we really want to 
start to develop the underlying 

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skills? 
Bring more awareness. 

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Bring more curiosity, bring more
intentional practice and a lot 

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of kindness. 
So they all go together 

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noticing, where that thought of 
what's the point pops up, 

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noticing, how you are asking for
what you want, how you are 

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establishing boundaries and 
finding easy ways to practice. 

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So that is what I wanted to 
share with you today thinking 

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about your professional 
development and getting what you

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want and If you want my help 
with that, just book, a consult,

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what can talk about it? 
And yes, we can definitely talk 

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about how to approach your work 
to ask for them to sponsor you, 

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if you want to work with me and 
you want to have your work 

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sponsor you for that, I love 
that conversation. 

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All right, thank you so much for
listening. 

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Have a great week and we'll talk
to you next time. 

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Hey, before you go, if you like 
this. 

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This podcast, leave a review. 
Tell me why you listen and what 

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00:17:16,300 --> 00:17:18,599
has helped you? 
Thanks so much. 

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00:17:18,599 --> 00:17:13,400
I'll see you next time. 
This podcast, leave a review. 

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00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:17,300
Tell me why you listen and what 
has helped you? 

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00:17:17,700 --> 00:17:19,800
Thanks so much. 
I'll see you next time.