1 00:00:04,800 --> 00:00:07,600 Welcome to the new manager podcast. 2 00:00:07,700 --> 00:00:16,500 I'm your host, Kim nickel. Hello and welcome. 3 00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:19,500 I'm glad you're here and I hope you're doing well. 4 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:23,900 Today on this episode, I'll be talking more about your work 5 00:00:23,900 --> 00:00:30,200 environment and how that affects you as a manager and as a human. 6 00:00:30,700 --> 00:00:34,200 And one of the reasons I was thinking about this one is that 7 00:00:34,200 --> 00:00:39,800 I have downstairs neighbors who are professional musicians and 8 00:00:39,800 --> 00:00:43,700 there is a person who plays as the flute and a person who plays 9 00:00:43,900 --> 00:00:48,300 I think the viola or the violin and so I often hear them 10 00:00:48,300 --> 00:00:51,800 practicing. It comes up through the floor 11 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:57,000 very quietly and it's so nice. I feel really fortunate, that I 12 00:00:57,000 --> 00:01:02,500 have neighbors like that because they're presents them just doing 13 00:01:02,500 --> 00:01:07,100 what they do influences my environment and because I work 14 00:01:07,100 --> 00:01:09,800 from home, it's not just my living environment, but it's 15 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:14,600 also my work environment. Mint and it reminds me of how 16 00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:19,800 much our environment can affect us and if you are working in an 17 00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:25,900 environment, that is not very conducive to you feeling at is 18 00:01:26,200 --> 00:01:30,800 whether it because of the amount of sound that happens in your 19 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:35,600 environment or the kind of lighting some of the folks that 20 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:38,400 I know that it both as my friends. 21 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:41,200 But also as my clients are very sensitive. 22 00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:46,100 Of to light. So if it's a very bright harsh, 23 00:01:46,300 --> 00:01:49,800 kind of cold light that is very draining for them. 24 00:01:50,000 --> 00:01:53,500 If it's a softer warm light that's a lot easier for them to 25 00:01:53,500 --> 00:01:56,200 be in. Just from a sensory perspective 26 00:01:56,500 --> 00:02:00,400 there are so many very subtle things that are happening in our 27 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:05,200 environment, that will affect the way that we show up to our 28 00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:08,300 work environment and to the people that we work with and to 29 00:02:08,300 --> 00:02:13,600 the way that we lead and I Have been talking on this podcast, a 30 00:02:13,600 --> 00:02:18,100 couple of times recently about self-advocacy and self-reliance 31 00:02:19,500 --> 00:02:24,600 and how self-reliance is great. And it can also get in the way, 32 00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:30,400 if it prevents you from speaking up and asking for a resource or 33 00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,000 an accommodation or just something that might be 34 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:38,100 available to you, but you never reach out for it because you're 35 00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:43,700 so locked into this belief of Stream self-reliance, that has 36 00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:47,200 served you in the past and one of my listeners, I want to give 37 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:50,600 a shout-out. She follows me on LinkedIn and 38 00:02:50,600 --> 00:02:54,300 she put a comment on one of my posts on LinkedIn. 39 00:02:54,700 --> 00:02:58,400 And she said, your podcasts have been super helpful. 40 00:02:58,900 --> 00:03:02,200 I waited over a year to ask for a chair. 41 00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:06,500 I'm over 6 feet tall and I really needed a chair that 42 00:03:06,500 --> 00:03:10,300 didn't cut off my circulation. I thought I was being 43 00:03:10,300 --> 00:03:13,600 burdensome. That I realized not asking 44 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:18,400 affected my productivity after I asked, it didn't seem like a big 45 00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:22,000 deal to them at all. They found me a temporary fix 46 00:03:22,100 --> 00:03:26,500 and ordered a chair. I love this because this is what 47 00:03:26,500 --> 00:03:29,800 I'm talking about. There are so many small things 48 00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:34,000 when I'm putting small in air quotes because on the one hand, 49 00:03:34,000 --> 00:03:35,500 it might seem like a small thing. 50 00:03:35,500 --> 00:03:38,500 It's a chair. And you might think oh, I can 51 00:03:38,500 --> 00:03:40,600 just endure. It's not a big deal. 52 00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:43,100 I don't want. It to be burdensome or I don't 53 00:03:43,100 --> 00:03:46,000 want to but I don't want to bother people, but this is your 54 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:50,200 physical body. This is the body that you that 55 00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:54,900 you live in and the body that literally supports you as you 56 00:03:54,900 --> 00:03:59,300 are doing work. And so when we neglect to 57 00:03:59,300 --> 00:04:03,900 consider, what is the effect on your physical body in the way 58 00:04:03,900 --> 00:04:05,900 that you're able to do your work? 59 00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:11,200 When we Overlook that, we really do a disservice to you and also 60 00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:14,800 It ripples out to everyone you work with because if your 61 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:20,399 physical body is cared for and supported, in this case, quite 62 00:04:20,399 --> 00:04:24,400 literally with appropriate, chair and furniture. 63 00:04:25,100 --> 00:04:29,300 That it makes everything easier and on the inside especially if 64 00:04:29,300 --> 00:04:34,400 you're a person who grew up and kind of absorbed this message of 65 00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:40,000 it's not okay to ask for things. Sometimes there's just nothing 66 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:42,600 available for you. You you just have to make do 67 00:04:42,600 --> 00:04:45,400 with what you have. Again that can be a very 68 00:04:45,400 --> 00:04:50,000 valuable survival strategy and A coping mechanism. 69 00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:54,200 But it's important to learn how to look beyond that especially 70 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:58,400 as you grow in your career because you will be making 71 00:04:58,400 --> 00:05:03,500 different kinds of decisions and it is helpful to learn other 72 00:05:03,500 --> 00:05:11,900 ways to approach challenges, not just to endure and The 73 00:05:11,900 --> 00:05:15,800 discomfort or the problem. That is not sustainable. 74 00:05:17,200 --> 00:05:20,600 So today we're talking about environment and that is just one 75 00:05:20,600 --> 00:05:22,500 example. And when we think about 76 00:05:22,500 --> 00:05:26,100 environment, the other reason this comes up is especially 77 00:05:26,100 --> 00:05:30,100 around communication and the things that hold us back from 78 00:05:30,100 --> 00:05:34,600 communicating either giving feedback or managing up or being 79 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:38,600 direct with someone, there's often a fear of how the other 80 00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:42,700 person will respond. And so, we think about how can I 81 00:05:42,700 --> 00:05:48,700 control what their reaction is going to be because that could 82 00:05:48,700 --> 00:05:52,800 either be highly uncomfortable or there could be a fear that 83 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:56,900 there could be adverse consequences either the fear of 84 00:05:56,900 --> 00:06:01,600 I don't want them to think that I am a difficult or demanding 85 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:07,700 person or I don't want them to become angry or displeased with 86 00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:12,500 me and this can come up whether the person You are avoiding. 87 00:06:12,500 --> 00:06:16,700 The conversation with is someone who reports up to you. 88 00:06:16,900 --> 00:06:22,700 So someone on your team or someone above you, we sometimes 89 00:06:22,700 --> 00:06:27,700 hold back from speaking up because there is a real power 90 00:06:28,100 --> 00:06:32,800 differential and it might be that what you have learned is 91 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:36,800 that whenever you are in, let's call it a precarious position, 92 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:41,100 whether it is or it simply feels precarious because someone has 93 00:06:41,200 --> 00:06:46,000 Has power over you in some kind of formal way than often. 94 00:06:46,300 --> 00:06:52,400 It's it feels super risky to actually speak up and risk. 95 00:06:52,400 --> 00:06:57,400 Someone's displeasure or disappointment, or anger or 96 00:06:57,500 --> 00:06:59,600 worried about what they'll think about you. 97 00:07:00,200 --> 00:07:04,400 I had so many conversations with my coaching clients around 98 00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:09,300 helping them think beyond what will this do for my reputation? 99 00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:11,100 I don't want to have a reputation. 100 00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:14,800 Being a troublemaker or someone who rocks the boat. 101 00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:20,300 It's so important that I be seen as a team player as someone who 102 00:07:20,300 --> 00:07:24,200 goes along. But there comes a time when that 103 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:28,300 is such a disservice to you. When it really will hold you 104 00:07:28,300 --> 00:07:33,200 back and not just in the sense of your career growth but in the 105 00:07:33,200 --> 00:07:39,200 sense of your Humanity, in this sense of really, what is good 106 00:07:39,300 --> 00:07:43,600 for your well-being, Being and not just in this moment, but 107 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:46,700 long term. So in terms of learning about 108 00:07:46,700 --> 00:07:51,800 communication and thinking about what is within my control, so 109 00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:55,300 often we're doing the calculation in our minds about. 110 00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:59,000 If I say this, they'll probably say that and then I'll say this 111 00:07:59,300 --> 00:08:03,800 and that's why we can have conversations in our mind over 112 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:07,000 and over and over again. And it actually Keeps Us in 113 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:11,900 avoidance, we don't have that conversation because Trying to 114 00:08:11,900 --> 00:08:16,300 control for how we think they're going to respond. 115 00:08:16,900 --> 00:08:21,900 Now, this is why being aware of both what is in your control and 116 00:08:21,900 --> 00:08:25,300 what is not in your control becomes helpful because it gets 117 00:08:25,300 --> 00:08:28,400 you unhooked from that. Internal rumination. 118 00:08:28,600 --> 00:08:31,500 And there are a couple things I want to offer to think about in 119 00:08:31,500 --> 00:08:34,600 that sense. One is take into account the 120 00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:36,900 environment that you're working in. 121 00:08:37,500 --> 00:08:40,500 It's possible that the environment you're working in 122 00:08:40,700 --> 00:08:45,000 and I mean that in terms of physical environment, but also 123 00:08:45,000 --> 00:08:50,500 the culture, the culture of your particular organization, the 124 00:08:50,500 --> 00:08:55,900 culture of your particular like business unit or team, depending 125 00:08:55,900 --> 00:09:00,200 on the size of your organization, each Collective of 126 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:06,700 colleagues can really create their own microculture, all of 127 00:09:06,700 --> 00:09:13,000 that can either be very supportive of You or it can feel 128 00:09:13,100 --> 00:09:18,300 like something you have to prepare yourself to endure and 129 00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:23,200 move through in spite of. So for example, I was chatting 130 00:09:23,200 --> 00:09:26,000 with a client. What was this? 131 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:30,400 Maybe a couple of weeks ago, and she was really struggling with a 132 00:09:30,408 --> 00:09:35,200 situation at work and as we were coaching and exploring it, one 133 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:39,100 of the things she realized is she said, oh, I'm working in an 134 00:09:39,100 --> 00:09:42,500 actually a very hostile. Work environment. 135 00:09:43,400 --> 00:09:46,800 She just identified and she said, oh no wonder I'm feeling 136 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:50,100 this way. Look at the environment that I'm 137 00:09:50,100 --> 00:09:53,900 working in and everyone is you know, behaving in the certain 138 00:09:53,900 --> 00:09:56,100 way. And when I look at it I think oh 139 00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:59,900 I think I see this in a whole new light and it really can 140 00:09:59,900 --> 00:10:03,100 explain the experience I'm having that's turning into 141 00:10:03,100 --> 00:10:06,900 self-doubt and self-questioning and is draining my energy. 142 00:10:07,300 --> 00:10:12,900 So do look at the environment because that Will have an effect 143 00:10:12,900 --> 00:10:17,900 on how you feel able to make decisions around communicating 144 00:10:17,900 --> 00:10:20,200 with people. The other piece is the 145 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:23,900 individual piece. This is the piece about managing 146 00:10:23,900 --> 00:10:28,800 yourself, being able to identify and understand what are your 147 00:10:28,900 --> 00:10:33,300 patterns understanding, how they serve you and how they get in 148 00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:35,700 the way. And the great thing about this 149 00:10:35,700 --> 00:10:40,200 is when we look at you, as the individual, that will always 150 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:43,800 point Towards, where is your agency? 151 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:48,000 And where is your autonomy? And both of these words are 152 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:52,600 about power. So agency is about your capacity 153 00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:57,400 to take action and I think of this as being very situational 154 00:10:57,700 --> 00:11:01,600 because there may be times where your energy is really low, you 155 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:05,200 might be really drained and your sense of agency. 156 00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:11,700 The capacity that you have to take action is reduced But on 157 00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:14,400 another day, you're super well rested. 158 00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,800 You're feeling really appreciated and respected and 159 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:21,300 recognized. You will have access to more 160 00:11:21,300 --> 00:11:27,400 capacity to take action. It will be easier to tap into 161 00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:30,900 your sense of agency and your sense of agency. 162 00:11:30,900 --> 00:11:37,300 Might also fluctuate depending on the other people involved. 163 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:42,200 So, with some folks that you work with, you might I Feel Like 164 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:47,100 Your Capacity to take action is much reduced because you might 165 00:11:47,100 --> 00:11:51,500 feel intimidated by them, they might kind of activate all of 166 00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:56,300 your insecurities and defense mechanisms and you just feel 167 00:11:56,300 --> 00:12:00,600 this reduced capacity. Also, if you're into Spoon 168 00:12:00,600 --> 00:12:04,100 Theory, you know, some days, you've got four spoons, some 169 00:12:04,100 --> 00:12:09,200 days you've got to or maybe one. And so, if you are having a one 170 00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:15,100 spoon kind of day, Then your capacity to take action is going 171 00:12:15,100 --> 00:12:18,900 to be a little bit less than if you have like a for spoon day, 172 00:12:19,300 --> 00:12:22,300 so that's agency. I think of it as situational 173 00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:25,400 capacity to take action autonomy. 174 00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:29,900 I think of as the bigger picture because autonomy is the question 175 00:12:29,900 --> 00:12:35,300 of your feeling of power over yourself, in a sense, of self 176 00:12:35,300 --> 00:12:40,300 government, in a sense of, do you have the freedom to make 177 00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:44,000 decisions? Ins about yourself, one of the 178 00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,300 things that I have had the pleasure to experience, as I 179 00:12:47,308 --> 00:12:51,100 have transitioned into my own private practice, I have 180 00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:55,700 tremendous autonomy over my schedule. 181 00:12:56,100 --> 00:13:00,900 When I was working in an environment, I felt I had much 182 00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:07,600 less autonomy, much less power to govern my schedule because 183 00:13:07,700 --> 00:13:11,300 people could request meetings and I was often in me Things 184 00:13:11,300 --> 00:13:14,700 with people that maybe I, you know, I think of as people of 185 00:13:14,700 --> 00:13:19,100 not of my choosing whereas now in the way that I work, I have 186 00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:24,200 complete autonomy, every person on my calendar is someone of my 187 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:29,500 choosing whether it's a client or a consult or I'm teaching or 188 00:13:29,500 --> 00:13:34,200 doing a webinar or, you know, like in some kind of online 189 00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:39,100 learning environment. I have so much autonomy over 190 00:13:39,100 --> 00:13:41,300 what I'm doing. And when that feeling Of the 191 00:13:41,300 --> 00:13:44,700 freedom to decide over one's self. 192 00:13:44,700 --> 00:13:49,500 And so that I sometimes find with my clients, they can lose 193 00:13:49,500 --> 00:13:53,000 that big picture when there's something they're trying to 194 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:58,400 solve for in the moment. So for example, perhaps the work 195 00:13:58,400 --> 00:14:02,900 environment has changed over the years, and when you started in 196 00:14:02,900 --> 00:14:06,700 this particular organization, things felt really good and you 197 00:14:06,700 --> 00:14:10,200 were growing, and you really liked who you worked with. 198 00:14:10,200 --> 00:14:13,200 And you felt very Satisfied. By the way, you were treated and 199 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:17,500 compensated, and maybe now it's a couple of years and now you're 200 00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:21,300 feeling like you're started to outgrow it and because you're 201 00:14:21,300 --> 00:14:24,300 feeling like, it's not really a good fit anymore. 202 00:14:24,500 --> 00:14:27,600 It's happened. Gradually, you've been growing 203 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:31,800 gradually, and your desires and interests and goals. 204 00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:35,100 Also, look different. Now than maybe, they did five 205 00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:38,900 years ago, so you're starting to grow Beyond where you currently 206 00:14:38,900 --> 00:14:41,500 are. It doesn't really feel like Calf 207 00:14:41,500 --> 00:14:47,200 it and because it doesn't feel like a fit, you might feel like 208 00:14:47,200 --> 00:14:53,100 you have to work harder in order to make things work. 209 00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:56,000 Have you ever done that? Have you ever stayed in a 210 00:14:56,000 --> 00:14:59,200 relationship? That wasn't really good for you 211 00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:04,200 anymore, but you thought I have to make this work, I can't leave 212 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:08,700 until I make this work and so you double down and reinvested 213 00:15:08,700 --> 00:15:10,900 and you stayed longer and put more energy. 214 00:15:11,100 --> 00:15:14,400 G into something that wasn't a fit anymore. 215 00:15:14,900 --> 00:15:18,400 Imagine if you had a pair of shoes and you wore them and they 216 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:21,200 seem to fit pretty well. But after a while they started 217 00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:25,300 to pinch and you thought, oh I can't take these shoes off. 218 00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:30,000 I need to try harder even though you are outgrowing them, and all 219 00:15:30,000 --> 00:15:32,200 it did. When you stayed was it made you 220 00:15:32,500 --> 00:15:36,600 feel more pain and discomfort and maybe even made you feel 221 00:15:36,600 --> 00:15:39,100 like a failure? Is there something wrong with 222 00:15:39,100 --> 00:15:40,800 me? That I can't make this work? 223 00:15:41,300 --> 00:15:47,000 Not a fit is not a problem. It's simply not a fit and 224 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:52,000 sometimes that discomfort is a sign to start asking yourself, 225 00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:55,700 is it time to look for something else? 226 00:15:56,100 --> 00:16:01,300 Not because you are failing but because you are outgrowing, the 227 00:16:01,300 --> 00:16:04,700 place that you've been. I think this one can be so hard 228 00:16:04,700 --> 00:16:08,400 especially if you feel a real sense of care and commitment to 229 00:16:08,400 --> 00:16:10,900 the people you work with or to the bigger mission. 230 00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:14,700 And of the organization, emotional attachments are real 231 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:19,100 and it can be hard to think about moving into something new 232 00:16:19,100 --> 00:16:21,800 and letting go of what is familiar to you. 233 00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:27,200 So when we get a little stuck looking at all, this isn't 234 00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:28,900 working. Is it with me? 235 00:16:29,100 --> 00:16:33,500 I need to try harder. I want to point you back to your 236 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:38,400 autonomy, the bigger picture. Why are you choosing this? 237 00:16:38,700 --> 00:16:42,600 Why are you still choosing this? This is this still what you want 238 00:16:42,600 --> 00:16:47,200 for myself many years ago, I had this moment where I realized, 239 00:16:47,200 --> 00:16:50,600 gosh, I feel like I've outgrown this role. 240 00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:56,100 I feel like I've outgrown this job and I still keep coming. 241 00:16:56,700 --> 00:17:01,100 I'm the one who wakes up every morning and brings myself into 242 00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:04,400 this job and into this role that I don't think fits anymore. 243 00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:08,300 Why am I doing that? And I realized, for me, there 244 00:17:08,300 --> 00:17:12,000 was a sense of momentum. There was a sense of Of success, 245 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:16,000 like I felt successful because I was pretty good at it, even 246 00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:19,900 though it had stopped feeling meaningful to me. 247 00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:22,900 And I felt like I was stagnating a bet. 248 00:17:22,900 --> 00:17:26,400 I wasn't really growing in a way that mattered to me. 249 00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:31,000 And so I had to do a real Soul search in a lot of reflection 250 00:17:31,000 --> 00:17:35,100 about. Who am I now what do I want now 251 00:17:35,300 --> 00:17:40,000 and tapping into my autonomy by seeing this bigger picture, 252 00:17:40,000 --> 00:17:43,500 which was You know what? It's time to go. 253 00:17:43,800 --> 00:17:47,700 It's time for someone else to have this job and it's time for 254 00:17:47,700 --> 00:17:52,200 me to move to my next chapter and even though it might feel 255 00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:55,200 kind of scary. I'm worth it. 256 00:17:55,200 --> 00:17:58,800 I'm worth taking that chance. I'm worth seeing what else is 257 00:17:58,800 --> 00:18:04,000 possible for me out there and so sometimes we forget the autonomy 258 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:08,600 peace and we get really entangled and hooked in the 259 00:18:08,600 --> 00:18:13,400 grind of the day to day. Of the moment and there's this 260 00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:18,000 thing, I see that happens when our environment is reflecting a 261 00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:22,100 message of you know you're not succeeding, you're not hitting 262 00:18:22,100 --> 00:18:26,800 all these markers, it can really start to undermine your sense of 263 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:31,400 confidence and it can start to Cloud your vision and you stop 264 00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:35,300 seeing what you're really great at and you stop seeing what's 265 00:18:35,300 --> 00:18:38,900 possible beyond this particular moment. 266 00:18:38,900 --> 00:18:44,300 We start trying to troll other people or other situations 267 00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:48,600 rather than kind of unhooking that and bringing that sense of 268 00:18:48,600 --> 00:18:51,100 what is within my scope of control. 269 00:18:51,300 --> 00:18:55,300 That's within me because a lot of things in my environment are 270 00:18:55,300 --> 00:18:59,700 not going to be in my control, I might be able to influence them 271 00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:02,900 like in the example. At the beginning of this episode 272 00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:07,100 around asking, for a chair that actually might be more in 273 00:19:07,100 --> 00:19:10,900 control than you realize, but learning how to distinguish. 274 00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:14,700 Between what's really in your control and what's not? 275 00:19:15,000 --> 00:19:19,700 Where is your autonomy? Where is your agency being able 276 00:19:19,700 --> 00:19:24,100 to identify and track? All of that becomes really 277 00:19:24,100 --> 00:19:27,400 important? Especially, if you are wanting 278 00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:33,700 to enjoy a sustainable and long-term and dynamic, you know, 279 00:19:33,700 --> 00:19:38,100 adult professional life because things change, sometimes not of 280 00:19:38,100 --> 00:19:41,800 our choosing but when we remember to ask, Ask where is my 281 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:44,400 agency? Where is my autonomy? 282 00:19:44,500 --> 00:19:49,900 My feeling of freedom to make decisions over my own self that 283 00:19:49,900 --> 00:19:54,900 sense of self governance. It has a tremendous effect on 284 00:19:54,900 --> 00:19:56,700 how you experience the day-to-day. 285 00:19:57,200 --> 00:20:00,100 With a lot of my clients, they report that the feeling of 286 00:20:00,100 --> 00:20:04,100 pressure starts to lift. They start to see things with 287 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:08,900 clearer vision including the distinction between, what's 288 00:20:08,900 --> 00:20:10,800 them, and what's their environment. 289 00:20:11,300 --> 00:20:20,400 And what they want next and how the now connects to what is next 290 00:20:20,400 --> 00:20:22,500 for them. Whether it's still in that 291 00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:27,000 organization or not, because what's next doesn't always mean 292 00:20:27,300 --> 00:20:31,600 leaving to go someplace else. Sometimes, what's next means 293 00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:36,400 reorganizing the relationships so that you find more 294 00:20:36,400 --> 00:20:41,500 fulfillment and satisfaction in where you are for 'Well, by 295 00:20:41,500 --> 00:20:45,000 requesting a chair or by establishing boundaries around 296 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:49,600 your schedule or by having difficult conversations rather 297 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:52,500 than avoiding them. So that is what I wanted to 298 00:20:52,500 --> 00:20:55,800 share with you today is to consider for yourself. 299 00:20:56,200 --> 00:21:00,200 Where is your sense of agency? Where is your sense of autonomy? 300 00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:04,900 What are you trying to control? And is that really a useful 301 00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:09,200 direction for what you're trying to control and just have that 302 00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:12,900 understanding for yourself? How all of this is affecting 303 00:21:12,900 --> 00:21:17,700 you, if you want to work on this in a more structured and 304 00:21:17,700 --> 00:21:20,700 in-depth way that I want to invite you to come work with me 305 00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:25,500 on February 14th. I am starting a group coaching 306 00:21:25,500 --> 00:21:30,900 program, so that is a fantastic way to learn in community with 307 00:21:30,900 --> 00:21:33,600 others. A lot of us get very self 308 00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:37,200 isolated as we go up in our leadership. 309 00:21:37,300 --> 00:21:39,700 And there's something really cool about talking with other 310 00:21:39,700 --> 00:21:43,000 managers. Who are not in your company, not 311 00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:47,400 in your organization, maybe not even in your industry, because 312 00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:51,100 they will be less attached. And also, you won't have feel 313 00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:52,800 like, you have to protect your image. 314 00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:56,000 You can really just be a human who is learning how to work with 315 00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:59,400 humans and deal with the emotional lift as well. 316 00:21:59,700 --> 00:22:04,400 All of that gets easier when you're learning outside of your 317 00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:08,200 work environment. So, and I want you to invite to 318 00:22:08,200 --> 00:22:10,900 that and I'll put a link into the show notes. 319 00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:15,600 Or just go to my website. Kim nickel.com go to the new 320 00:22:15,600 --> 00:22:18,900 managers page and you'll find a link at the top of that page. 321 00:22:19,300 --> 00:22:22,400 That brings you to the registration and all of the 322 00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:24,500 details. But come to that. 323 00:22:24,500 --> 00:22:28,100 That's going to be an amazing way to learn if you want more 324 00:22:28,300 --> 00:22:34,400 one-on-one learning and that's really good for having a longer 325 00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:37,100 time to work with, since I work with my clients for 6 months, 326 00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:40,500 then come work with me one-on-one and I'll put a link 327 00:22:40,500 --> 00:22:44,600 to my Jewel in the show notes and you can book a time to talk 328 00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:47,600 with me, that is what I have for you today. 329 00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:52,300 Being a human is not always easy working with humans, not always 330 00:22:52,300 --> 00:22:57,400 easy, but I've got you, you've got yourself, and you are not 331 00:22:57,400 --> 00:22:59,900 alone and all this. Thanks for listening. 332 00:22:59,900 --> 00:23:02,900 Have a great week and I'll talk to you again next time. 333 00:23:07,700 --> 00:23:12,600 Hey, before you go, if you like this podcast, Leave a review. 334 00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:16,400 Tell me why you listen and what has helped you? 335 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:19,000 Thanks so much. I'll see you next time. 336 00:23:11,100 --> 00:23:15,500 Leave a review. Tell me why you listen and what 337 00:23:15,500 --> 00:23:17,700 has helped you? Thanks so much. 338 00:23:17,800 --> 00:23:19,000 I'll see you next time.