1
00:00:04,800 --> 00:00:07,600
Welcome to the new manager 
podcast. 

2
00:00:07,700 --> 00:00:16,700
I'm your host, Kim nickel. 
Hello, and welcome. 

3
00:00:17,100 --> 00:00:19,900
I'm glad you're here. 
And I hope you're doing well 

4
00:00:20,300 --> 00:00:22,200
today. 
I wanted to start with a 

5
00:00:22,208 --> 00:00:26,900
celebration, a couple of my 
clients have started new jobs 

6
00:00:26,900 --> 00:00:31,400
very recently, and there are 
kind of two things about this 

7
00:00:31,600 --> 00:00:34,900
that I specifically wanted to 
share with you, with one of my 

8
00:00:34,900 --> 00:00:37,200
clients. 
They found their job and got 

9
00:00:37,200 --> 00:00:40,400
hired a lot faster than they 
thought it would happen. 

10
00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,700
Their expectation was based on 
the experience. 

11
00:00:43,700 --> 00:00:46,500
They had the last time they were
looking for a job, which was 

12
00:00:46,500 --> 00:00:50,000
about two years ago. 
And at the time it was more 

13
00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:54,800
challenging and that was just 
like a less pleasant experience.

14
00:00:55,100 --> 00:00:59,000
And so as they were approaching 
this current job search, they 

15
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:02,200
were preparing for it to be 
unpleasant and for it to take a 

16
00:01:02,208 --> 00:01:06,500
long time and what they didn't 
realize was that the job market 

17
00:01:06,500 --> 00:01:11,700
has changed what they're looking
for was actually I'm going to 

18
00:01:11,700 --> 00:01:13,900
line up. 
Really nicely with something. 

19
00:01:13,900 --> 00:01:16,300
Somebody else was looking for 
and like the whole process just 

20
00:01:16,300 --> 00:01:19,900
happened a lot faster. 
And what we also did in the 

21
00:01:19,900 --> 00:01:23,700
course of our work together was 
talk through their career 

22
00:01:23,700 --> 00:01:25,900
Journey. 
So they could really feel more 

23
00:01:25,900 --> 00:01:31,000
clear and confident in sharing 
their story about the career 

24
00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:33,200
Direction. 
They had Chosen and the changes 

25
00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:36,600
along the way and why were they 
were really interested in this 

26
00:01:36,600 --> 00:01:41,200
new job and this new company in 
this new role and things. 

27
00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:44,300
A lot faster than they planned. 
And I thought this was such a 

28
00:01:44,300 --> 00:01:48,900
great reminder to share with 
you, which is we often have our 

29
00:01:48,900 --> 00:01:53,300
past experience, and then we put
it in front of our eyes and we 

30
00:01:53,300 --> 00:01:56,600
look at the present through the 
lens of the past. 

31
00:01:56,600 --> 00:01:59,300
Now, sometimes, this is helpful,
right? 

32
00:01:59,300 --> 00:02:02,100
It's one of the ways that we 
learn from our past but it's 

33
00:02:02,100 --> 00:02:05,000
helpful to be aware when you're 
doing it. 

34
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:09,199
Because what can happen is you 
assume the experience you had 

35
00:02:09,199 --> 00:02:15,500
before is Going to be the 
default repeat of what's going 

36
00:02:15,500 --> 00:02:19,000
to happen going forward. 
And so, the reason that becomes 

37
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:23,200
problematic is that you don't 
prepare for what's in front of 

38
00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:26,200
you. 
You're actually preparing for 

39
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:29,700
the past because you're assuming
the past is going to happen 

40
00:02:30,100 --> 00:02:35,100
again, and it can be hard to see
this when we're in it. 

41
00:02:35,500 --> 00:02:40,700
And so I wanted to name that so 
that you can be aware of, are 

42
00:02:40,700 --> 00:02:44,300
you? 
Trying to plan for and prepare 

43
00:02:44,300 --> 00:02:49,300
for what is happening now. 
And what is like what you want 

44
00:02:49,300 --> 00:02:54,300
to have happen in the future. 
Are you doing that by putting 

45
00:02:54,600 --> 00:02:57,200
the lens of your past in front 
of you? 

46
00:02:57,700 --> 00:03:00,000
And it's like, you're actually 
trying to solve for something 

47
00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:03,500
from two years ago rather than 
simply being present in the 

48
00:03:03,500 --> 00:03:07,700
moment with what's happening now
and kind of letting go of the 

49
00:03:07,700 --> 00:03:09,700
expectations, that things will 
be. 

50
00:03:09,900 --> 00:03:12,400
Now the The way they were 
before. 

51
00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:16,000
So that was one thing. 
And the other thing is that I 

52
00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:19,300
have another client who also is 
starting a new job and it's a 

53
00:03:19,300 --> 00:03:22,300
big job with a big title and a 
big salary. 

54
00:03:22,600 --> 00:03:25,900
And one of the things they are 
finding is all of the 

55
00:03:25,900 --> 00:03:30,100
insecurities and proving that 
they had in the past. 

56
00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:32,900
It is still with them in the 
present. 

57
00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:35,900
And this I wanted to share it 
because this is something. 

58
00:03:35,900 --> 00:03:39,600
I see a lot to where we think 
all I really have to prove 

59
00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:43,400
myself. 
I really Them to believe that I 

60
00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:46,000
can do this. 
That I'm up for the task. 

61
00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,900
I'm ready for this new bigger 
responsibility. 

62
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:53,300
And then what happens is, you 
get it and then you freak out, 

63
00:03:53,500 --> 00:03:57,500
you feel all that insecurity 
flare-up, you worried, you know,

64
00:03:57,500 --> 00:04:00,200
am I up for this? 
This is different than I've done

65
00:04:00,200 --> 00:04:03,700
before there. 
Are these unexpected challenges 

66
00:04:03,700 --> 00:04:06,700
or unexpected things that I 
didn't know, you know how it 

67
00:04:06,700 --> 00:04:09,700
would be. 
And what happens is that 

68
00:04:09,700 --> 00:04:13,600
insecurity that we have. 
Have flares up no matter what is

69
00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:16,399
happening around us. 
And we sometimes think, if I 

70
00:04:16,399 --> 00:04:20,300
have a big title if I have a big
salary, if I have a lot of 

71
00:04:20,300 --> 00:04:24,000
visibility, if I'm in the in the
driver's seat and I am in the 

72
00:04:24,000 --> 00:04:25,900
one who gets to make the 
decisions. 

73
00:04:26,700 --> 00:04:33,000
Then I will really feel 
confident because I must be good

74
00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:37,500
at what I'm doing in order to 
have this new job because what 

75
00:04:37,500 --> 00:04:42,100
we think is the reason people 
have big jobs with Salaries and 

76
00:04:42,100 --> 00:04:45,000
big responsibility that must be 
because they're really good at 

77
00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:49,000
what they do. 
And those are all things that 

78
00:04:49,000 --> 00:04:52,700
don't always go together and 
sometimes that in itself, can be

79
00:04:52,700 --> 00:04:57,300
incredibly disappointing when 
you realize, oh my gosh, all 

80
00:04:57,300 --> 00:05:01,500
these people who are working at 
this level. 

81
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:06,000
Like they are also humans and 
they're not always quite good at

82
00:05:06,000 --> 00:05:09,400
what they do. 
It can sometimes feel like a 

83
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:11,200
disappointment and kind of a 
shock. 

84
00:05:11,200 --> 00:05:15,800
And so I wanted to share that 
with you because if you are in a

85
00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:19,800
situation where you've gotten a 
promotion or you've gotten a new

86
00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:23,700
job or you've changed Industries
and you're so excited about it, 

87
00:05:23,700 --> 00:05:31,000
but you suddenly feel a big 
flare of insecurity and your 

88
00:05:31,000 --> 00:05:35,900
confidence feels really shaky. 
That is a normal thing and 

89
00:05:35,900 --> 00:05:40,400
that's something to solve. 
Internally rather than trying to

90
00:05:40,400 --> 00:05:47,300
get an external circumstance to 
solve for that insecurity. 

91
00:05:47,500 --> 00:05:51,000
You know, wherever you go, you 
bring yourself with you. 

92
00:05:51,700 --> 00:05:54,200
And so I wanted to share that 
with you because I know that's 

93
00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:56,100
going to help some of you 
listening today. 

94
00:05:56,700 --> 00:06:00,200
Now, the main thing I wanted to 
talk with you today about is 

95
00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:06,100
this concept that came up as I 
was coaching a few of my clients

96
00:06:06,600 --> 00:06:12,000
and It's it comes up especially 
as you move into your 

97
00:06:12,000 --> 00:06:17,100
professional life and you gain 
more experience and you start to

98
00:06:17,100 --> 00:06:19,500
rise into higher levels of 
leadership. 

99
00:06:19,500 --> 00:06:22,200
Like, that's where it really 
starts to show up. 

100
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:26,400
But the seeds of it are planted 
much much earlier. 

101
00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:33,800
And it's the idea of learning 
through mimicking by mimicking, 

102
00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:42,100
what we see and trying to Do the
same verses learning through 

103
00:06:42,300 --> 00:06:49,400
creating by being internally 
creative and creating something 

104
00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:52,500
because you're interested in in 
what is possible. 

105
00:06:52,500 --> 00:06:55,800
And you have an idea for how it 
can go and learning through that

106
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:59,900
way. 
Now, when we are young and by 

107
00:06:59,900 --> 00:07:04,400
Young, I mean, like, when you're
born, we're gonna go way back. 

108
00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:11,000
One of the first ways that we 
learn like the method for 

109
00:07:11,000 --> 00:07:17,800
learning is by observing others 
and then trying to mimic what we

110
00:07:17,800 --> 00:07:21,000
see, this is how we learn to 
speak. 

111
00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:25,700
Write like you're a little baby 
and there are adults saying 

112
00:07:25,700 --> 00:07:30,500
things to you, trying to get you
to mimic them, trying to get you

113
00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:36,700
to repeat back to them. 
Like that's how we And when you 

114
00:07:36,700 --> 00:07:40,600
get a little bit older, you see 
people walking and you try to 

115
00:07:40,600 --> 00:07:45,700
mimic that, you see it, and you 
try to repeat it and do it for 

116
00:07:45,700 --> 00:07:48,200
yourself. 
And so, very, very early on. 

117
00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:53,100
We learn that being observant 
noticing how other people are 

118
00:07:53,100 --> 00:07:57,500
doing things or how other people
are being and then attempting to

119
00:07:57,500 --> 00:08:04,000
mimic that for ourselves is a 
way to learn and what becomes a 

120
00:08:04,000 --> 00:08:08,100
little bit tricky. 
Is it requires that somebody 

121
00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:14,400
outside of you is establishing a
standard and then your job is to

122
00:08:14,400 --> 00:08:18,200
meet that standard and 
traditionally School kind of 

123
00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:22,600
works like that too. 
Or even learning to play an 

124
00:08:22,600 --> 00:08:24,200
instrument. 
Right? 

125
00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:28,000
Like someone, you know, gives 
you a standard gives you a 

126
00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:32,500
scales gives you, you know, 
something to play and shows you 

127
00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:35,799
what, you know, how to hold the 
instrument or how to I took 

128
00:08:35,799 --> 00:08:37,100
piano. 
So I didn't have to hold the 

129
00:08:37,100 --> 00:08:40,000
piano but someone showed me. 
No, here's where you rest your 

130
00:08:40,000 --> 00:08:42,000
hands. 
And here's how you, you know, 

131
00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:46,000
have your elbows and here's how 
you, you know, do your scales to

132
00:08:46,000 --> 00:08:48,000
practice the fingering in the 
movement. 

133
00:08:48,300 --> 00:08:53,300
And so someone else, establishes
a standard and then your job is 

134
00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:57,800
to learn how to do that, how to 
meet that standard, and then you

135
00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:03,600
are evaluated against your 
ability to replicate, or to 

136
00:09:03,900 --> 00:09:07,300
accurately mimic. 
Fuck that behavior or that 

137
00:09:07,300 --> 00:09:13,400
standard and as we grow up, what
ends up happening is we compare 

138
00:09:13,400 --> 00:09:15,600
ourselves to others. 
We look outside. 

139
00:09:15,600 --> 00:09:22,000
We see other people and assume 
that they are demonstrating the 

140
00:09:22,000 --> 00:09:29,300
standard, like the standard and 
your job is to comply and to 

141
00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:35,500
mimic that and to replicate that
for yourself and then you You 

142
00:09:35,500 --> 00:09:40,000
decide internally, whether you 
are doing a good job or not, 

143
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:43,500
whether you are on track or not,
based on what you see other 

144
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:46,400
people doing. 
And we do this in careers, 

145
00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:48,900
right? 
Like comparing ourselves to our 

146
00:09:48,900 --> 00:09:52,600
friends or our peers, and making
decisions about how you feel 

147
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,800
about how you're doing based on 
what where you see other people.

148
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,300
We also do this in our 
relationships. 

149
00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:03,400
So if a lot of your friends are 
getting married and you are not,

150
00:10:03,500 --> 00:10:07,800
and you might think, oh my gosh,
am I behind is something wrong 

151
00:10:07,800 --> 00:10:10,400
with me? 
Am I off track? 

152
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:15,200
Because we tend to internalize 
this kind of standard or 

153
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:18,400
template of how things are 
supposed to be. 

154
00:10:18,700 --> 00:10:23,700
And we can be so hooked in to a 
sense of, you know, being 

155
00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:26,800
rewarded or being on track or 
feeling like we're doing a good 

156
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:31,200
job based on that comparison. 
And one of the other ways, this 

157
00:10:31,200 --> 00:10:33,300
shows up specifically in the 
workplace. 

158
00:10:33,300 --> 00:10:37,700
Is that if you, you know, look 
around And you and especially if

159
00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:41,400
you're looking up, right? 
Like you're thinking about what 

160
00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:46,400
will my life and career look, 
like a few years, down the road.

161
00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:50,400
And you might look at, you know,
we'll who seems to be very 

162
00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:54,800
successful and success might be,
you know, the salary they make 

163
00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:57,200
success might be the kind of 
decisions. 

164
00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:01,400
They get to make success might 
be the kind of projects, they 

165
00:11:01,400 --> 00:11:04,300
get to work on. 
However, you define that you'll 

166
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:05,200
look around. 
You'll see. 

167
00:11:05,208 --> 00:11:08,800
See, okay, if I stay here in 
this industry, or in this 

168
00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:12,700
organization, what success is 
available to me? 

169
00:11:13,300 --> 00:11:17,500
And you'll kind of look around. 
And you'll assume that what 

170
00:11:17,500 --> 00:11:22,900
you're seeing is what's 
available and that if you want 

171
00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:29,300
to be successful, it will have 
to look like what you see around

172
00:11:29,300 --> 00:11:32,600
you. 
You'll assume that you will need

173
00:11:32,700 --> 00:11:38,400
to mimic or replicate. 
What you see around you and I 

174
00:11:38,400 --> 00:11:43,400
had a client very recently, who 
was grappling with this and she 

175
00:11:43,400 --> 00:11:47,500
is at this high level in her 
organization and was having a 

176
00:11:47,500 --> 00:11:51,500
career conversation with her 
boss and her boss said, hey, 

177
00:11:51,500 --> 00:11:55,900
have you thought about going for
partner and she thought about it

178
00:11:55,900 --> 00:11:59,500
and she kind of hesitated 
actually because she thought 

179
00:11:59,700 --> 00:12:03,200
well, like I see people at the 
partner level and it doesn't 

180
00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:05,000
look like they're doing any of 
the fun. 

181
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,800
Work that I like to do. 
It seems like all they do is 

182
00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:10,900
business development. 
They're not actually doing the 

183
00:12:10,900 --> 00:12:14,600
design and running the projects.
They're doing a lot more of this

184
00:12:14,600 --> 00:12:16,800
other kind of work that I'm not 
interested in. 

185
00:12:17,100 --> 00:12:20,900
And they also seem really busy 
and not that happy. 

186
00:12:21,100 --> 00:12:24,100
And she thought, like, if that's
what it needs to be, you know, 

187
00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:27,200
work at the partner level or 
Torque at the principal level, 

188
00:12:27,200 --> 00:12:28,900
where I'd have to give up the 
work. 

189
00:12:28,900 --> 00:12:34,200
I actually like doing and I 
would be even busier and it 

190
00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:35,700
would not be that much. 
Hon. 

191
00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:37,300
I don't know that. 
I want that. 

192
00:12:37,500 --> 00:12:40,600
And so what we've been working 
on is noticing. 

193
00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:43,200
Oh, right. 
Like, this is you doing that 

194
00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:45,800
mimicking, like seeing what's 
outside? 

195
00:12:45,900 --> 00:12:48,800
Comparing yourself to that? 
And assuming that what you see 

196
00:12:48,800 --> 00:12:52,300
is the only option rather than 
asking yourself. 

197
00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:55,800
Well, if you are going to be 
partner, or if you are going to 

198
00:12:55,800 --> 00:12:59,900
be principal, what would you 
want that to look like? 

199
00:13:00,800 --> 00:13:04,000
What kind of partner would you 
want to be? 

200
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:07,700
What kind of principal would you
want to be? 

201
00:13:08,100 --> 00:13:12,500
How would you want that to work?
And considering the possibility 

202
00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:14,700
that you could actually create 
that? 

203
00:13:14,900 --> 00:13:17,800
Just because you don't see, it 
doesn't mean it's not possible. 

204
00:13:18,000 --> 00:13:21,000
But as humans we tend to 
overlook this, right? 

205
00:13:21,000 --> 00:13:25,000
Like, what we see tends to 
solidify as that's what's 

206
00:13:25,200 --> 00:13:27,400
available and I have to choose 
from that. 

207
00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:34,100
It can be trickier to feel like 
there is room to design and 

208
00:13:34,100 --> 00:13:37,100
create. 
Your own version of that. 

209
00:13:37,100 --> 00:13:42,200
So if mimicking and learning by 
mimicking and learning by 

210
00:13:42,200 --> 00:13:46,700
replication and learning, by 
comparing to an external 

211
00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:49,600
standard, that someone else has 
established. 

212
00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:54,200
Like if that's kind of where we 
start and it's helpful sometimes

213
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:57,700
what other Alternatives do we 
have? 

214
00:13:57,700 --> 00:14:01,600
And this is where I want to 
share the possibility of 

215
00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:07,500
creating and learning through. 
Shannon rather than from 

216
00:14:07,500 --> 00:14:11,900
replication or mimicking. 
So, when we're learning by 

217
00:14:11,900 --> 00:14:18,700
creating, what we do is we look 
to others as one example of how 

218
00:14:18,700 --> 00:14:26,100
it can go not as the example or 
the standard and it's no longer 

219
00:14:26,100 --> 00:14:30,300
your job to meet that. 
Now, looking at others, just 

220
00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:34,200
becomes information that can be 
really interesting. 

221
00:14:34,900 --> 00:14:36,300
Just noticing. 
Okay. 

222
00:14:36,300 --> 00:14:39,700
So this is how I'm seeing it 
done or this is you know, how 

223
00:14:39,700 --> 00:14:43,200
I'm noticing. 
Some people do it and then you 

224
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:47,700
ask yourself. 
What is it that I want? 

225
00:14:47,700 --> 00:14:51,400
How is it that I would want to 
do this? 

226
00:14:51,500 --> 00:14:54,200
Like what are the pieces that I 
would want to have be a part of 

227
00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:56,900
this? 
If I were going to do it in my 

228
00:14:56,900 --> 00:15:00,500
style or in my voice? 
What would that be like? 

229
00:15:01,200 --> 00:15:04,600
And the hardest part about that 
is our instinct when? 

230
00:15:04,800 --> 00:15:08,100
You've gotten really good at 
mimicking, others. 

231
00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:16,100
It's so hard to trust that your 
own ideas are as worthy and 

232
00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:18,700
valuable and that they will 
work. 

233
00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:22,800
So that's that's the work that 
we do is to kind of unwind that 

234
00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:28,600
story because when you start to 
get curious, like if trusting 

235
00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:33,400
that your own ideas are also as 
valuable and as possible as what

236
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,900
you see, modeled some Times that
can be a hard. 

237
00:15:35,900 --> 00:15:37,700
Leap can feel like a leap of 
faith. 

238
00:15:37,700 --> 00:15:40,200
It can feel very risky and very 
scary. 

239
00:15:40,500 --> 00:15:43,200
So where you start is you just 
start to get curious. 

240
00:15:43,400 --> 00:15:46,600
You ask yourself. 
How would I want this to go? 

241
00:15:47,100 --> 00:15:51,200
What might be possible? 
What is, you know, the ultimate 

242
00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:54,300
results that I want to create 
and what are all the different 

243
00:15:54,300 --> 00:15:57,600
ways that I could create that? 
Even if it's something that I'm 

244
00:15:57,600 --> 00:16:01,900
not seeing other people do and 
we just start with that 

245
00:16:01,900 --> 00:16:06,500
Curiosity and then you begin To 
create it. 

246
00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:10,600
So one of my clients wanted to 
create in her life, no meeting 

247
00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:14,000
Fridays and it felt kind of 
risky because she didn't see 

248
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:16,400
anybody else in her organization
doing that. 

249
00:16:17,000 --> 00:16:21,400
But we said okay, if you got to 
choose how your schedule worked 

250
00:16:21,900 --> 00:16:25,400
like, what is the schedule that 
would be most supportive for the

251
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:28,600
work that you do and for the way
that you want to live, and she 

252
00:16:28,600 --> 00:16:32,300
said, I want no meeting Fridays.
I want time for Focus work. 

253
00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:36,100
I want time for deep thinking. 
Gagging, I just want to have 

254
00:16:36,100 --> 00:16:40,000
that time at the end of the week
where I'm not in meetings all 

255
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,100
day. 
So what happens? 

256
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:46,100
Somebody asks her if she can 
meet on a Friday, what she did 

257
00:16:46,100 --> 00:16:49,200
was she responded to this person
and she said, hey, I'm trying 

258
00:16:49,200 --> 00:16:50,800
out. 
No meeting Fridays. 

259
00:16:51,000 --> 00:16:54,700
Can we schedule for you know? 
Next Monday afternoon instead? 

260
00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:57,400
And the person said, oh, yeah. 
Good for you. 

261
00:16:57,400 --> 00:17:00,400
Of course we can it was no big 
deal. 

262
00:17:00,500 --> 00:17:04,200
So she got curious, right? 
Like, how do I want my schedule 

263
00:17:04,200 --> 00:17:06,900
to work? 
And she started to create it. 

264
00:17:07,200 --> 00:17:09,400
Let's see if we can actually 
make this happen. 

265
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:14,400
And so as you start to take 
these small steps and you start 

266
00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:18,900
to build your trust in what is 
possible and you start to learn 

267
00:17:18,900 --> 00:17:21,400
as you go, what really works for
you. 

268
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:25,400
And this is so cool. 
Because what it means is, as you

269
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:29,500
go instead of comparing yourself
to what you see, other people 

270
00:17:29,500 --> 00:17:34,400
doing and assuming that, what 
they're doing, is what you 

271
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:37,000
should be doing. 
Doing or that what they have is,

272
00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:40,300
what you should have. 
What happens when you are doing 

273
00:17:40,300 --> 00:17:45,200
this from creation, is that you 
check in with yourself you check

274
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:50,000
in with your results. 
And you ask is this creating 

275
00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:55,000
what I want rather than 
comparing yourself to others and

276
00:17:55,000 --> 00:18:00,000
feeling like you're, you know, 
behind or off track according to

277
00:18:00,000 --> 00:18:03,700
somebody else because the other 
thing that happens, especially 

278
00:18:03,700 --> 00:18:09,600
as we get older, Older in life 
is that if you are continuing to

279
00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:14,100
work primarily from mimicking 
and from replicating, what 

280
00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:18,200
happens is you get really good 
at creating a life and a career 

281
00:18:18,300 --> 00:18:24,000
that you might not even want. 
Like you can feel the sense of 

282
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:29,100
reward of I did it. 
I'm on track but you never 

283
00:18:29,100 --> 00:18:33,600
paused to ask is this even 
something that I truly want for 

284
00:18:33,600 --> 00:18:38,200
myself? 
And as a human, you learn more 

285
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:42,400
and more about yourself every 
year of your life. 

286
00:18:42,500 --> 00:18:46,900
And in your career, you 
absolutely learn more and more 

287
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:51,100
about yourself. 
I have a new neighbor and we met

288
00:18:51,100 --> 00:18:53,800
yesterday because he 
accidentally locked himself out 

289
00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:57,000
of his apartment. 
So, he rang my doorbell and like

290
00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:01,900
I had helped him kind of get 
sorted out, but he told me that 

291
00:19:01,900 --> 00:19:06,200
he used to work in mining and he
was, Are going to grad school to

292
00:19:06,200 --> 00:19:10,800
learn how to build tunnels and 
he said, yeah, I just got tired 

293
00:19:10,800 --> 00:19:16,100
of living so far away from 
everybody and he wanted to do 

294
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:19,200
work. 
That was closer to people in 

295
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:21,700
closer to town and I thought. 
Yep. 

296
00:19:21,700 --> 00:19:25,300
This is exactly what we do. 
We get interested in something. 

297
00:19:25,400 --> 00:19:30,400
We go down One path and you 
learn more about yourself as you

298
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:33,400
go and you learn more about what
you want. 

299
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:34,800
And it's not that you were 
wrong. 

300
00:19:34,900 --> 00:19:36,900
Long before like, with my 
neighbor. 

301
00:19:36,900 --> 00:19:39,500
It's not that it was wrong that 
he, you know, he didn't make a 

302
00:19:39,508 --> 00:19:43,700
mistake in going into mining. 
Right? 

303
00:19:43,700 --> 00:19:47,700
Like he said, a goal, he 
achieved it and along the way. 

304
00:19:47,700 --> 00:19:49,400
He learned some new things about
himself. 

305
00:19:49,700 --> 00:19:52,400
I think this is true for all of 
us in our careers. 

306
00:19:53,100 --> 00:19:55,100
Yes. 
There are a few folks who know, 

307
00:19:55,100 --> 00:19:58,000
at a very early age like this is
what I'm going to do. 

308
00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:01,700
And they have that Clarity. 
That was not me and that's not 

309
00:20:01,700 --> 00:20:03,700
most of the people I know and 
work with. 

310
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:06,600
So I'm That might also be true 
for you. 

311
00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:12,100
So when you are creating you 
release, the comparing yourself 

312
00:20:12,100 --> 00:20:16,700
to others and you also release 
the story that you're behind and

313
00:20:16,700 --> 00:20:21,900
you decide what you want based 
on your vision by checking, in 

314
00:20:21,900 --> 00:20:26,200
with yourself, as you go and by 
experimenting and trying things 

315
00:20:26,200 --> 00:20:29,600
along the way. 
And what's amazing is that it is

316
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:34,100
so surprising what is actually 
possible, and what you can 

317
00:20:34,100 --> 00:20:36,300
create. 
Because you're always learning 

318
00:20:36,300 --> 00:20:39,400
more about yourself and the 
world and your industry. 

319
00:20:39,700 --> 00:20:44,000
Or if you change careers, like 
there's so much that's available

320
00:20:44,200 --> 00:20:51,200
when we start to kind of soften 
our grip on the template that we

321
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:54,500
think we have to follow. 
When we realize that other 

322
00:20:54,500 --> 00:20:59,100
people are showing us examples 
of what's possible, but it's not

323
00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:05,900
a complete set and so you don't 
have to comply or Or adhere to 

324
00:21:05,900 --> 00:21:08,900
what you think you're supposed 
to do, or what you think, your 

325
00:21:08,900 --> 00:21:11,700
career is supposed to look like,
you can actually create 

326
00:21:11,700 --> 00:21:15,100
something that is so tailor-made
for you. 

327
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:19,400
That supports your goals 
professionally and financially 

328
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:23,100
and in your personal life and it
might look different than how 

329
00:21:23,100 --> 00:21:27,300
you thought it would. 
And that's okay doesn't mean 

330
00:21:27,300 --> 00:21:30,200
that you're behind doesn't mean 
that anything is gone wrong. 

331
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:34,400
It just means that you are 
leading the way. 

332
00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:41,800
You are in Creative territory. 
You are charting A, New Path and

333
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:47,400
you are inspiring and lighting a
path for others. 

334
00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,300
So that is what I wanted to 
share with you today. 

335
00:21:50,700 --> 00:21:53,300
Thank you so much for being 
here. 

336
00:21:53,300 --> 00:21:56,300
Thank you for listening. 
I hope you have a great week and

337
00:21:56,300 --> 00:22:04,000
I'll talk to you next time. 
If you know, it's time to level 

338
00:22:04,000 --> 00:22:07,900
f. 
You feel your perfectionism Self

339
00:22:07,900 --> 00:22:10,200
Doubt and uncertainty getting in
the way. 

340
00:22:10,600 --> 00:22:14,100
Then come work with me. 
We'll have six months of 

341
00:22:14,100 --> 00:22:18,100
one-on-one coaching and it all 
starts by going to my website, 

342
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:24,400
chemicalguys.com coaching and 
joining my waitlist. 

343
00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:26,000
Talk to you soon.