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Welcome to the new manager 
podcast. 

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I'm your host, Kim nickel. 
Hello and welcome today. 

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I want to talk with you about 
the problem with trying to solve

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problems. 
And before we do, I want to 

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share a comment from one of my 
students. 

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She said, Kim helped to elevate 
my leadership skills and is a 

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wonderful coach and educator her
management course, was a journey

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of inspiration and motivation. 
Nation. 

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I came out of it with actionable
items and new leadership skills.

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I will use a daily and I wanted 
to share that because as a 

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teacher and as a coach that is 
one of the most satisfying kinds

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of feedback. 
I get from my students that 

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people leave feeling inspired 
and that they know what to do. 

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And they feel like they are 
equipped to take actionable 

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practical steps with Whatever is
coming up for them on a daily 

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basis. 
And that brings us to our topic 

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for today, which is the problem 
with trying to solve problems. 

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And this shows up a lot with my 
students who are making the 

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transition from Individual 
contributor to a manager and 

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Leadership role. 
Because as an individual 

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contributor often, the job is, 
there's a Their point of focus. 

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A particular kind of problem. 
Your job is to solve it. 

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But as you grow into a manager 
or leadership role that is no 

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longer your job and part of the 
reason why is because the kinds 

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of questions you're now dealing 
with become more complex. 

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And also just as a very 
practical, very candid 

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perspective. 
What worked in the past, might 

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not work now because the world 
is very tumultuous and a lot of 

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you might be managing for the 
first time and doing this at 

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home doing this without having 
the same level, or the same 

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accessibility or the same kind 
of communication available to 

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you. 
Because now everything Has to be

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through a video call or through 
a phone call. 

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There's a lot that can't just 
happen through in-person 

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conversation and communication 
and you know, communication is 

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something that humans tend to 
struggle to do. 

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Well. 
Anyways, now that we are further

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restrained in the ways that we 
can communicate a lot of the 

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things that were difficult, that
becomes even, Even more 

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Amplified, the good news is that
it means that as you decide to 

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focus on improving your 
communication skills, and that 

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does include listening, by the 
way. 

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It's not just about the 
information or direction that 

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you direct towards someone. 
It is also about your ability to

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receive and perceive and 
understand what it is that they 

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are offering to you. 
Through the way that you listen,

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so, as you start to get better 
at that at communication, it 

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will help you in so many 
different kinds of ways. 

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It will help you to build trust 
with people. 

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It will help you to understand 
what's happening at a bigger 

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picture because people are 
opening up to you and telling 

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you more of what's going on. 
It also eliminates. 

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It's confusion and 
misunderstandings and 

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interpersonal conflict when we 
communicate well, and when we 

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are eliminating those things. 
We can work so much more easily 

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together. 
We can perform at a higher 

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level. 
We waste less time. 

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We waste less energy. 
So I'm a big fan of 

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communication and whatever you 
need to do in order to improve 

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and to develop your skill around
it. 

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This is definitely a time when 
we need you to be good and 

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confident and effective in your 
communication style. 

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And as you know, I mean 
everybody is learning. 

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How to do this and we're 
continuing to learn what this 

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means and how this works. 
Now, that work is sort of 

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different because of covid and 
shelter in place, but the skill 

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is something that you will use 
forever. 

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Now, going back to this big 
picture of the problem with 

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trying to solve problems, is 
what can happen. 

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When you are a manager. 
Is, it's very easy to get caught

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in the weeds, wanting to get 
over-involved and either 

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micromanage things. 
Where you Have a very specific 

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idea of what needs to happen and
how it needs to happen. 

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And it has to be your way. 
So you might have a tendency to 

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become over controlling and I 
haven't met anybody yet who 

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loves a micromanager. 
So beware. 

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That's a pitfall that can 
happen. 

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The other thing that happens. 
If you are trying to solve all 

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of the problems is it can bring 
you into a place of trying to 

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oversimplify Like you will want 
to look for this, the most 

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simple solution, and what that 
can turn into is it can turn 

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into blame right? 
Like the problem is that person 

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or that department? 
And the blame perspective is 

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actually very unhelpful. 
Yes. 

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It's helpful to have the ability
to evaluate and understand the 

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relationship and to understand 
all of the different things that

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happen in the course. 
Generating a problem, but it 

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becomes so easy and it becomes 
even more problematic to slip 

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into this place of blame where, 
you know, the problem is you or 

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the problem is this team, or the
problem is that department? 

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Or the problem is when we start 
to put that blame out towards 

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others, that gets in the way of 
actually moving forward. 

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The other thing that can happen 
is the mindset of if only things

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were different. 
If only. 

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Things were different. 
If only this person had not 

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dropped the ball. 
If only, we had more time. 

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If only we had the budget, if 
only these people were reliable 

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and followed through. 
If only, we were not in covid 

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right now, like there are lots 
of different things. 

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You can look to to say, oh my 
gosh, if only things were 

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different and that is also not a
really helpful place. 

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Go and I think that because 
things are still so challenging 

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and people are getting 
fatiguing. 

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I know that in my world. 
There's been a lot of expression

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of clash. 
Like I just wish it would go 

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away. 
I just wish that we could get 

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back to how things used to be. 
Especially right now, as I'm 

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recording this. 
We're just beginning to move 

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into the school year. 
So My people with kids, my 

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family, there's a my my Not my 
step sister. 

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My sister-in-law is an 
elementary school teacher like 

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her world is totally upside down
and we're all tired. 

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Right? 
And so this feeling of like 

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gosh, if only, we could just 
make covid go away so that we 

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could have childcare and regular
schools when we go into that 

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perspective, when we're faced 
with a problem that also doesn't

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help us to move forward and 
especially when you're in a 

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leadership role when people are 
looking to You for guidance, 

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when people are looking to you 
to set the tone trying to move 

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quickly to solve problems, can 
really just create this tangle 

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of unhelpful, blame, and 
Nostalgia, and frustration. 

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And you yourself might feel pain
because you really want to solve

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this problem. 
Because you care so much and 

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that frustration, and irritation
and pain that you feel, you will

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end up taking that out on other 
people. 

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You won't mean to write, you 
want to do this intentionally, 

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but what happens is you will 
have less patience less 

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curiosity, less energy. 
You will just be more fatigued 

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and easier to lash out at others
when you are in that state. 

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So, I want to offer you this, as
a perspective of what will be 

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helpful, instead. 
Number one, you are going to 

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need curiosity. 
That just means I want you to 

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slow down. 
So, rather than trying to 

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respond right away to solve a 
problem. 

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I want you to slow down for a 
minute. 

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Take a breath. 
Get curious. 

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And that Curiosity might bring 
you to a broader perspective. 

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What's the big picture here or 
it might bring you to a more 

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granular perspective. 
What specifically is the issue 

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here? 
But just take that moment to 

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pause and to be curious before 
you try to chase down and 

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resolve and get in the Weeds on 
every problem. 

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Another thing that you will need
you will need. 

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It to be comfortable with the 
unknown. 

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And you will need to be 
comfortable with the 

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uncomfortableness. 
It is uncomfortable to face a 

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problem and not know how to fix 
it. 

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Especially if you are a 
solutions-oriented person. 

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And you have done a really good 
job, all of your life of 

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pointing out problems and fixing
them. 

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This is really going to 
challenge you. 

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It's going to feel uncomfortable
and it's going to just really 

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make you not want, not want to 
feel it, but it will become 

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important because your ability 
to be uncomfortable. 

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And to be okay, with that means 
that you can stay patient. 

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You can stay curious. 
And really importantly, you also

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become this calm force. 
And this very stable presence 

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for your team. 
For those who are looking to you

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for guidance. 
One way to think of it, is that 

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if someone comes to you with 
something that is difficult. 

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That is a problem, which gives 
you a greater sense of feeling 

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like you're in this leadership 
role one is to respond quickly 

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and phonetically and just like, 
oh, let me do it or I'll just 

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tell you exactly what to do, 
right? 

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That's one possibility is to get
micromanage e and reactive. 

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another is to say some to Simply
say, I'm so glad you are 

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bringing this up. 
I'm glad that we're talking 

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about this in this exact moment.
I do not have an answer for you.

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Let's see what we can do. 
Staying calm being honest. 

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You don't have to pretend to 
have an answer. 

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Just saying what's to in the 
moment appreciating that they're

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raising it taking a breath. 
Let's figure this out. 

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I think that now more than ever,
we all want someone to hold that

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sense of calm confident. 
We will find a way. 

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And that brings us to my last 
point, which is you are going to

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need your curiosity. 
Because everything, our 

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curiosity, you're going to need 
your creativity. 

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They go hand in hand. 
So you need your creativity 

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because the thing is that were 
available solutions to you in 

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the past might not be available 
right now. 

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So when you stay calm, when you 
get curious, when you're okay 

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with the discomfort. 
Part of the unknown. 

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Then you begin to access your 
creativity. 

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What else is available here? 
How else can we? 

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Look at this? 
Who else could I possibly talk 

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to that? 
Might have an idea around. 

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This, what question have we not 
asked? 

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That might really help. 
When you are in that state of 

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being more calm and curious, you
are able to tap into your 

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creative thinking, ability and 
creativity is amazing. 

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It's incredibly incredibly 
helpful, especially when you are

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facing problems and challenges 
that you have never faced 

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before. 
So I want to leave you with 

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this. 
You will continue to be faced 

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with problems that are complex 
and Frustrating and you are 

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going to want to just solve them
and you will try to find the 

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most reductive simplest path. 
And that is not always the most 

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helpful approach, one 
alternative. 

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I want you to just slow down for
a moment. 

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Take a breath. 
Get curious. 

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Feel comfortable with whatever 
is happening or not happening 

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and begin to access your 
creativity. 

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I hope this has been helpful for
you. 

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If you have a like this podcast 
episode, please leave a review 

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or send me a note. 
I am on LinkedIn and I love 

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hearing from your for my 
audience and my listeners and 

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it's always great to know how 
this is being helpful for you. 

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You are bringing so much to your
workplace into the people who 

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look to you for guidance. 
I know things. 

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Not easy, but I also know that 
we can do this. 

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I just deeply believe that this 
is such an incredible 

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opportunity to bring a lot of 
good and a lot of help and a lot

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of support into our 
organizations and to our 

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customers and you do that 
exactly where you are in your 

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organization. 
The most powerful seat in any 

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organization is the one you're 
sitting in, because that's where

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you have the ability to 
influence those around you. 

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You okay? 
Thank you so much for listening.

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I'll see you next time. 
Do you want personal 

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confidential help with your 
situation at work? 

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I offer one-on-one coaching and 
can help you overcome challenges

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reach your goals and become a 
more effective leader to 

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schedule a consult. 
Go to my website, Kim nickel.com

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coaching and we'll schedule time
to talk about. 

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About what's going on with you 
and how I can help. 

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Talk to you soon.