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Welcome to the new manager 
podcast. 

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I'm your host, Kim nickel. 
Hello, and welcome. 

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I'm glad that you're here. 
I hope you're doing well today. 

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I want to talk with you about 
strategic thinking and feedback.

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If you did not listen, yet to my
episode, on the Strategic 

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thinking, one episode prior. 
Definitely listen to that. 

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It'll give you a lot more 
context around, what I mean when

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I say strategic. 
Gang and how to do it. 

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But for now, the way I want to 
share it with you, is that the 

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fastest way to identify how 
you're thinking strategically is

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with two questions. 
What am I doing? 

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And why? 
When you answer those questions 

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that will reveal to you. 
What is your current strategic, 

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thinking about a situation? 
What are you doing? 

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And why? 
And when you're immersed, Just 

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in your own strategy. 
It will seem obvious. 

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Obviously. 
I'm doing this for these 

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reasons. 
And it's helpful to remember 

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that we see things differently. 
We have developed different 

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strategies for navigating the 
world for navigating Human 

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Relationships for dealing with 
all of the things that come our 

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way. 
And we've all learned different 

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strategies for being successful 
in the midst of all of it. 

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So understanding for yourself. 
What am I doing? 

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And why and remembering that 
what seems Yes, to you may not 

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be evident or obvious to others 
and two other pieces that I 

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wanted to share with you, 
especially with respect to 

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feedback. 
And when we're thinking 

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strategically, is that very 
often our personal strategies 

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are values-based and 
identity-based and you can think

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of it like this. 
You might think I really value 

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Harmony in. 
Chips and therefore, the reason 

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why I do things is because I'm 
seeking to create or preserve 

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Harmony in collaboration in 
relationships in accomplishing 

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things. 
I'm always seeking to do that in

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the most harmonious way because 
I value Harmony its efficient. 

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It is enjoyable. 
It's what one of the things I 

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value and so I will always seek 
To find and Implement strategies

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that are in alignment with that 
value. 

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And that's the kind of thing 
that may not be happening on a 

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conscious level. 
It just feels like, obviously we

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do things in this way because I 
value this value. 

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So that's one piece to keep in 
mind. 

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The other is around identity. 
And as a coach, I saw this. 

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A lot when I was doing 
Communications coaching because 

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so many of my clients would say,
well, I really am an introvert 

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or I really am not good at 
public speaking. 

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And I would notice how strongly 
folks would identify with this 

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sense of I, am I am this 
therefore, I have to do things 

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this way. 
Therefore I can I cannot do 

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things that way and a lot of the
work was helping people to 

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reframe that a bit so they could
be. 

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Yeah, both be an introvert and 
understand that there are 

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skills. 
You can that are still available

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to you and just because you're 
not comfortable with this 

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particular, skillset yet. 
That doesn't mean that for the 

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rest of your life. 
You don't you don't improve or 

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you don't find your own way of 
Using the skills in a way that 

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still fills available in 
familiar to you. 

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I think we often mistake 
familiarity with identity. 

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We say, I am just this way, but 
really, maybe it were just 

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saying this is most familiar to 
me. 

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And so I continued to do this 
because it feels familiar. 

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It feels safe. 
It's worked this far. 

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So, when we think about your 
Career and your life, and who 

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you are as a person. 
There's this really interesting 

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overlap between you in the 
workplace and what it means for 

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you to grow, as a leader to grow
as a more skillful and a more 

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effective manager. 
And this underlying sense of 

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what you value of, how you think
of yourself in the world. 

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And what is the Effect that has 
on your strategy and then on the

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decisions that you make another 
place. 

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I see this come up, a lot is 
folks that say well, I, you 

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know, I'm a helpful person. 
I'm a team player, this 

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dovetails beautifully with their
sense of values, right? 

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The sense of I value being a 
team player. 

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I value collaboration. 
I want to be helpful because 

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that's who I am. 
And that's part of what. 

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High value in relationships, but
that can play out in a really 

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not great way. 
If that means that you're then 

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becoming so available to 
everybody that you're no longer 

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setting boundaries, you're 
taking on work. 

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That isn't yours. 
You don't know how to say, no, 

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you don't know how to ask for 
help and you end up. 

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Burning yourself out or just 
becoming overwhelmed and Be and 

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resentful. 
And even though the underlying 

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value the underlying identity 
that is shaping these decisions.

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You can still feel, you can 
still feel good about those. 

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You can still keep those but you
want to be aware of how does 

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this affect your strategic 
thinking? 

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And what are the choices you're 
making and why? 

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And then what effect does that 
have? 

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So, with that in mind now? 
Let's turn to feedback and what 

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your strategic thinking means, 
for the way that you deliver 

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feedback. 
I once had a student in my class

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who said with great pride. 
I give comprehensive feedback to

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my team. 
I give very thorough and 

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comprehensive like line item 
feedback of all of the things 

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that I see they could be doing 
well. 

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And I asked him like, what is 
your reasoning behind that? 

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Why do you do that? 
And he said like, oh, I really 

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value being thorough and I want 
to be open and transparent and 

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so all of his reasoning behind 
that was coming from a really 

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good place, but the effect of 
that on the other side, turns 

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into people, feeling overwhelmed
people, not knowing what to 

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focus on, not knowing what to 
prioritize. 

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People feeling nitpicked like 
you can't find anything. 

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I'm doing, right? 
You're only finding the things 

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that I'm doing wrong. 
It can create a feeling of 

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discouragement. 
Like nothing I ever do is good 

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enough. 
I never get recognized for the 

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things I do. 
Well, I only get noticed for the

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things that I don't do. 
Well, it can undermine trust 

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feeling like, oh, my manager 
doesn't appreciate me. 

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And so when you are in The role 
of being a manager and part of 

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your job is about giving 
feedback, then it's so 

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important. 
To reflect on what is the 

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Strategic thinking that you 
currently have. 

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And how is that affecting the 
way that you give feedback? 

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So, let me offer a few different
ways that you can start to think

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about this when you're asking 
yourself, why? 

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Am I doing this? 
Like, what am I doing? 

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And why what feedback are you 
giving? 

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And why you can answer that 
question in so many ways. 

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Are you giving feedback based on
their goals? 

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Did your person tell you in a 
one-on-one that their goal is to

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get promoted to, you know, some 
role and you know that in order 

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to do that, they're going to 
have to develop certain skills, 

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or maybe this person. 
And said, I'm so uncomfortable, 

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speaking in front of groups. 
So I'm going to make a goal of 

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developing my public speaking 
skills. 

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And so you're giving them 
feedback specifically related to

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something. 
They have said that they care 

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about. 
So are you giving feedback 

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that's related to their goals? 
Are you giving feedback because 

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you want to control them and you
want to be right? 

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It's helpful to just be honest. 
If this is true, it's not a bad 

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thing. 
It is a human thing because you 

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have an idea of how things 
should be and as a human we like

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to be right. 
It feels good to our brains, but

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you want to be honest. 
Are you giving this feedback 

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because you're trying to control
the way they're doing things. 

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Because you just think that your
way is better. 

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That's how you've always done 
it. 

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And you want to be right in this
situation. 

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It might be, are you giving this
feedback because you want to see

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a behavior change. 
Is there something specific in 

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this person's behavior? 
That is not working or that is 

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not effective or that could be 
different or that could be 

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better. 
And so, are you giving feedback 

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to kind of like lift awareness 
and also let them Know, if 

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they're on track, or if they're 
off track. 

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Is it about a behavior change? 
Are you giving feedback because 

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this is how you're going to 
boost morale and build trust 

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giving feedback as not always 
about. 

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What is somebody not doing. 
Well, a lot of time. 

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It's going to be about, hey, I 
saw that you did this really 

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well, and I just wanted to 
acknowledge and tell you that, 

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hey, I really appreciate the way
you did. 

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X Y & Z. 
Hey, I just wanted to let you 

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know, you bring this one 
particular strength to our team 

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and it really means a lot like 
really. 

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Add value to the team here. 
Maybe the reason you're giving 

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feedback is because you're 
thinking strategically, I need 

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to give my team a little bit of 
a morale boost and I need to do 

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some work to build trust. 
I need to show them that I also 

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see value and appreciate the 
work that they're doing. 

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Are you giving feedback because 
you're trying to present trying 

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to prevent disaster or a 
year-end ambush? 

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And this is for my listeners who
are very conflict avoidant and 

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will say everything is going 
fine all year long and then at 

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the end of the year, you'll say 
well, here are all of the ways 

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that you fell short of 
expectations. 

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I understand why people do this 
and it is not helpful and it 

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feels terrible. 
If you've ever been on the other

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side of that, if you are 
surprised. 

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Just about feedback. 
You get how you're not meeting 

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expectations or how your work is
falling below, a certain 

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standard and nobody told you 
what that was. 

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And your manager didn't say. 
Hey, we need to talk about this 

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because I like we can fix it. 
Let's start working on it. 

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Now, to get you to where you 
need to be. 

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So that when you have your 
formal performance review, it 

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doesn't feel like a surprise or 
an ambush. 

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Bush or things are so far off 
track. 

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It's going to be really hard to 
recover. 

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Maybe that's why you're deciding
to give this feedback. 

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And maybe the reason you're 
giving feedback is because you 

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are avoiding confrontation. 
And so you only give them the 

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nice feedback because you don't 
want to hurt their feelings and 

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you feel really bad about having
to tell them that things are not

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great. 
And you keep hoping, maybe 

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they'll figure it out. 
Surely. 

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They see that this is not 
working and they'll just fix it.

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They must know. 
But I don't want to have to have

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a conversation with them because
it will feel uncomfortable. 

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So when you begin to ask 
yourself specifically, with 

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respect to giving feedback to 
the folks on your team, what am 

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I doing? 
And why, what am I not doing, 

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and why you begin to exercise 
the part of your brain that does

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strategic thinking, and you can 
be really Dynamic, really 

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intentional, and very process. 
Oriented, with respect to how 

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you're going to do that. 
I'll tell you that the first 

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time That I was in a formal 
performance review cycle for my 

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team. 
I had been on the individual 

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contributor side, of course, for
you know, many many rounds, but 

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when I flipped into the manager 
role and I didn't understand 

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until we were already in the 
cycle, the level of detail and 

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information. 
I would have to put into the 

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system like we had this internal
system for or scoring people and

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giving people qualitative 
feedback that was captured and 

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documented and then of you know,
we would have a conversation 

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about it. 
I had to do that for over a 

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dozen people, it took a long 
time. 

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It was my least favorite part of
the entire year and I thought, 

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oh my gosh, if I had just gone 
back and I had planned for this,

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if I had thought strategically, 
and if I had thought, okay, you 

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know in November December. 
We'll have to go into this 

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system and score and give 
specific feedback about what 

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people did. 
Well, like I could be gathering 

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information and building a 
record all along the way. 

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So, by the time, the holidays 
come, I'm not having to remember

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and think back to what did we do
this year? 

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Because you will forget I 
promise you. 

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There's so much will happen in 
the course of a year a month a 

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quarter. 
It's really hard to remember. 

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All of that, so instead of 
relying upon memory or sort of 

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like how you're feeling in that 
moment about that person. 

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When you start to think 
strategically, you begin to put 

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things into place. 
Now, that will benefit you, that

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will benefit your team members 
like so much later, but the 

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first time you go through, it 
can be tricky because, you know,

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you haven't done it before you 
don't, you know, maybe nobody 

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will tell you because Is they 
haven't thought to tell you, you

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know, it's one of those goofy 
things. 

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Congratulations. 
You're a manager. 

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Go figure it out yourself. 
And, you know, also, just to 

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remind you. 
It's not because like, this is 

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my belief. 
I don't believe people are 

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purposefully negligent about Not
Giving guidance for how to 

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manage people. 
I think it's just a lot to take 

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on quite frankly and the folks 
who are above you like your 

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manager, Your Man. 
Jurors manager, they're just 

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really busy. 
And they probably haven't 

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thought about this in depth 
either, or, you know, who knows?

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They have could have so much 
going on in their lives as well.

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They just don't have the time, 
so it helps tremendously to 

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think about feedback to think 
strategically about it. 

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What are you doing? 
And why? 

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What is the outcome you're 
trying to create? 

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What is the result that you're 
To create to notice what your 

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current choices are. 
And then to begin to question 

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and even start to create a 
strategic plan for the year, the

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half the quarter, the month, 
even dialing it into the week. 

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You can start to build it all 
around your one-on-ones and team

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meetings as well. 
But to have a sense in your mind

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of, how will I do feedback? 
What and you know, what are the 

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values and the self 
identifications that you'll want

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to be aware of like if you know,
That you tend to be very 

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harmoniously oriented and you do
not feel comfortable in any kind

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of a confrontation. 
You want to be aware of that for

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yourself, because that will get 
in the way unless you're able to

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intentionally, make a plan to 
move through it and that's part 

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of growth. 
So don't feel bad. 

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Like I don't think anybody knows
how to be a manager. 

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We all learn as we go, the 
difference is, when you're being

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intentional about it. 
It. 

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You can really establish some 
specific clear ways to develop 

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to grow which benefits, not just
you and your day-to-day but your

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entire team, your entire 
organization and you know, it's 

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really amazing how one small 
shift can create a really big 

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effect. 
So that is what I want to offer 

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you today, strategic thinking 
plus feedback. 

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Bigger picture as I'm recording 
this. 

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It is still early February, 
which means you've got the whole

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year laid out in front of you. 
And so, the time is now to think

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about how are you practicing 
feedback with the folks on your 

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team? 
I think it's often overlooked as

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sort of a boring necessity or 
something uncomfortable to be 

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avoided, but it really is a 
valuable touch. 

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A point if you choose to see it 
that way, so that's what I've 

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got for you. 
Thanks so much for listening. 

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I hope you have an amazing week 
and I will talk to you next 

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time. 
Hey, before you go. 

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If you like this podcast leave a
review. 

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Tell me why you listen and what 
has helped you. 

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Thanks so much. 
I'll see you next time.