Are You Lonesome Tonight? Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry? We drifted does your mail,
right? We're recording.
Welcome to the podcast. Welcome to significant lovers
Mel. We are two cousins.
I'm Kel and I am L. I'm nervous.
I'm nervous right now. So I'm just going to pretend I'm
talking about, I know guys like even though we're just two
cousins talking to each other, we still get stage fright before
the podcast you get stage fright.
Yeah. Yeah.
Thanks for joining us though. I know I said I was going to
talk to you but but thanks for joining us.
This is a podcast about relationships about love, is it
conversational type of podcast, sometimes As we get inspired to
talk about, you know, love cheating breakups, whatever
might have you. So yeah we might have some
tangents. Yeah.
Because sometimes the view
celebrities reflect our own experiences.
Yeah. Or friends or families.
Are you know just makes you think.
Yeah this makes you think because love is so confusing and
crazy and nobody has it figured out.
So Nobody, we're looking to other people to make sense of
it. And I feel like today, well,
neither of us are married. But I feel like today, we're
going to talk about marriage to make a long marriage work.
Because this couple has been married for 30 years.
Oh my God. Mmm.
Wow. I mean that's not like the
longest people have ever been on our show.
I feel like we don't usually have super-long married just
like that. So At least, not yet.
Mmm. And yeah.
So, today we are talking about the Obamas Barack Obama.
Michelle Obama. Oh, mama Riley.
Yeah, thanks Obama. Big that.
Yeah, we were like a little bit too young.
I mean we weren't, but like, we couldn't vote during this time.
Yeah, you know, know Obama elect was elected in when I was in
seventh grade. So yep.
Yep and yeah. So this is a iconic couple.
I feel like you we always we're going to do them someday.
I thought that they seemed a little bit too perfect.
Yes and no most not that interesting, that's what I
thought, but I got into this, I ended up really enjoying it and
the thing that made me interested in doing this jumping
ahead though. But I read that Michelle Obama
said, she couldn't stand her husband for ten years.
That's one-third of the things but that they made it through
and that piqued my interest, I thought.
Okay, that's interesting. I like that.
She admitted that. I know we'll get more into that
later. But yeah, I guess I will say
that, you know, this is a political couple of the traffic
in those there. Well right now this is this is a
political couple obviously Barack Obama was the president
of the United States but guys were not going to get To
politics. I'm not going to get into the
administration and what happened, and that's just
because it's not the scope of our podcast.
That would be way too much to come.
And yeah, that would be way that you could make an entire podcast
about Barack Obama. If you wanted to, you know, oh
yeah. And there's an albino was cast
out there. If that's what you want to
listen to. If you want to hear about more
about his presence presidency, I'm sure there's podcast out
there so you know, it's just not our wheelhouse.
House. No, we're just talking about
Barack and Michelle is love story for those who are curious.
I'm very curious. Yeah, I enjoyed researching this
I guess I should say Mel is still sick.
Bre, this is three weeks now. It's been horrible.
The Bones. Come on, antibiotics.
Now, but this isn't a doctor's listening, like what?
Someone gets a gold and then it does get better.
It actually gets worse. Like, what do you think?
What do you guys think that is like, has anyone been through
this before? Like it's very respiratory.
And a fever of 102 .9 yesterday, got tested.
It's not the flu, it's not strap, it's not covid.
They put me on antibiotics but I don't know.
So anyone has any advice? I'm going to Portugal next week.
So I'm gonna be better, guys. That's how dedicated she is.
She is still recording. Look professional.
But if my voice sounds weird, don't say anything.
Yeah, because I'm just trying to.
Yeah. Luckily, I will be doing most of
the talking today but yeah, so take someone Pressure off.
You can just go mmm-hmm. All right?
Usually we say three words to describe a couple.
What I came up with for them is grounded.
Mmm, honest I'm teasing, I love that.
Yeah, yeah, it's overall, pretty positive.
Couple. Nice break from tragedy and hmm.
Yeah, break up. You do.
Okay? So you doing no cheating, right?
None will see. You know, what gives a way
that's okay. So, just about their background,
you know, who are these people? I'm sure a lot of us do know,
but, you know, I didn't really know a lot of details about
them. So first, I'm gonna start with
Michelle Obama, born, Michelle Lavon Robinson, Michelle
Robinson think that's how she'll be in the title.
So she's On January 17th, 1964 in the south side of Chicago,
she's 511, the tall lady, mmm. And I'm, I just feel like her
personality just from all my research.
I mean, I'm sure a lot of you already know what she's like,
but if you don't, she seems very warm capable Smart.
Sharp determined does the right thing?
Can laugh and have fun, maybe a little cynical.
That's just about I was going for my research.
Her father was Fraser Robinson, he was a city water plant
employee and a democratic Precinct Captain, just kind of
like a local government thing. And her mother was a homemaker
until Michelle was in high school.
But I don't know what she did when she got a job, but she did
something. Michelle has a brother Craig,
who is now a college basketball coach?
Actually, mmm-hmm she was raised.
Methodist And turn Brock are actually still Christians today
and she has described her childhood as black.
Leave it to Beaver. She grew up in Chicago, she
lived on the whole family lived on the second floor of her aunts
house and I guess it was just a lot of family around like
they're friends with all the neighbors, you know, it was like
very tight-knit wholesome group, people all close together and
they lived on the second floor of the aunts house.
And her dad said, the reason they stayed there was because it
was worth it for them. Save money so that they could go
on vacation and they could save for their college and stuff.
So, yeah, they were they were middle class maybe like lower
middle class, but they ended up being able to save a lot by
living with the aunt. So he taught her lie about
sacrifices. The sacrifices you make for your
family. You know, she talked about that
a lot. So Michelle was a very good
student. She attended Chicago's first
Magnet High School which had specialized classes and I guess
round trip the bus. Stride was three hours every
day. God she's the salutatorian in
her class second in her class. That's pretty smart.
And in high school, stay the guy named David who apparently
smoked pot in his car and they went to prom together and that's
all I know about him. She say that.
Yeah, and she followed her brother and went to Princeton.
He went there to. Oh, wow.
And she majored in sociology, in minored, in African American
studies. Michelle has said that her time
at Princeton The first time she was really aware of her
ethnicity and experienced racism.
I think there's a girl. She was roommates with and the
mom didn't want her to room with her because she was black.
You know. Stuff like that horrible.
Yeah. And it was the first time she
also experienced like seeing super wealthy kids like she'd
never seen such Rich. Yeah Bubba forces kind of a
culture shock when she was at Princeton, she dated the guy
named Kevin who was two years older.
So we're both our dads, David David, And Kevin that true
that's interested. Kevin was two years older, he
played for the football team. Apparently, he was going to go
to medical school but then he changed his mind and wanted to
become a pro football mascot. What but then he ended up going
to medical school anyway and be human doctors.
Is that a new job growth of our mascot?
Yeah. Very different doctor.
I know Princeton has the so quirky but then he ended up
becoming a doctor. It's so funny.
Really he's just a guy who thought about doing it.
Yeah. You haven't we all know.
Have you thought about being a mascot just like what it's like.
No. No in there in the every time I
have to laugh. I have to cough.
Oh no. Every but I feel like I have
thought about like just those kind of like quirky jobs before
like I would love to be like at a resort.
Like one of the people who like leads the pool Ex.
Oh, oh, that's interesting. Wow, you don't like it just,
yeah, like that's kind of similar like a job.
That gets people hyped up, you know, sometimes I think I would
like to be a mailman. Oh, date woman.
Good benefits. Really good.
Benefits, my dad was, like, actually, like trying to
convince my brother to become a postal worker.
Yeah, yeah. I do something about it.
Seems nice just driving around all day.
Get to see y'all. I think looking people's mail
like, like an okay amount of money.
Yeah. My favorite teacher husband was
a mailman, so maybe that stuck with me.
Yeah. Anyway, Michelle, Michelle,
Michelle. Then after Princeton attended
Harvard Law School, she's fancy, and she earned her Juris doctor
and she went on to work at a law firm in Chicago.
All right. Now to Barack Barack Hussein
Obama. The second is his name.
He, I don't know why I include The height sometimes.
I just get here as he's six foot two tall guy but not the
tallest. President ever.
That was Abraham Lincoln. He was 64.
I think we all kind of know that is Barack the second tallest
president. He is the second tallest.
Wow. Yeah.
Who's the shortest? I forget he was someone from
like the 1800s. That?
Yeah, probably sure. I can remember that.
The guy was 54. Oh my God.
Are you kidding? No.
Oh, I thought you said for some reason I thought you said 45.
I know he's 54. Um so yeah Brock Obama he was
the 44th President of the United States but before that you know
he had a whole life. If I had to describe him based
on my research I would say that he's Charming smart witty funny
but also serious dedicated committed a little arrogant.
Maybe he said that himself he definitely talks a lot.
I like how we are now doing these, like summaries as
characters as if they're like Sims there.
Or something. Yeah.
I like that. Yeah.
So his dad Barack Obama senior was a Kenyan Economist.
His mother Stanley, Ann Dunham. I think she just went by an but
she went on to be an anthropologist but she met
Barack Obama senior. When they were students at the
University of Hawaii, crazy is Dad actually already married
back in Kenya when they met but he lied and said he was divorced
and he had two kids too. That's Crazy married and
legally. Yeah.
Wow, another one. Oh my God.
I know I think I did know that. Yeah.
Um for an kind of the otherwise. Yeah.
I can't remember how but somehow she did find out that he was
married. Um baby Brock was born August
4th 1961. Apparently growing up some
people called him. Barry I've heard that.
Yeah I'm so used to just calling him.
AMA. So I know, I don't really know
what to call him in this episode.
I guess Barack. Yeah, we're Obama.
Yeah, he was born baby. Barack was born.
August 4th, 1961. I read that.
They considered putting him up for adoption my God, but but
there's not a ton of evidence. Like maybe Barack Obama's.
Senior just said that, I don't know, but they ended up getting
divorced or separated. I don't really know how it
worked with them. Already being married thing, but
they divorced and His dad moved back to Kenya when Brock was
only a toddler and he last saw him when he was 10 years old.
Oh wow, I actually read that book.
He wrote a Dreams of My Father. I read it in college but I
remember what his dad come back and visit occasionally.
I think he did, okay. But then only up until it when
he was 10 and he didn't get it. That's so sad.
I know he had a stepfather, right?
He did. He did eventually get so his mom
and him, they moved to It'll and then his mom.
Married, a man from Indonesia and they moved there to
Indonesia. Oh my gosh.
Yeah, so you lived in Indonesia but then Brock returned to
Hawaii and fifth grade to live with his mom's parents.
Oh, without his mom. Yeah, he lived with his
grandparents in Hawaii. Moved around a lot as the
exactly that's the keeps us keep Reinventing yourself.
At least famous people move around a lot.
He Handed Occidental as I say it seems the college in Los Angeles
for two years. Then he trained Los Angeles.
Yeah. Oh for college akaka.
Sorry sense. Yeah sorry I jumped ahead a lot
Los Angeles for two for two years then he transferred to
Columbia University in New York. When does young adult?
He seemed have some more descriptions as a young adult.
He seemed very bookish reader. Charming intelligent wordy D as
in loves use big words kind of know it all.
Hmm he's a really good writer. He really was.
So there's this book by David maraniss called Barack Obama,
the story and in it there's letters and journals from
Obama's. Ex-girlfriend just crazy to me
because he's still alive. Like doesn't that seem like
something people? Do really historical figures.
Imagine like him leading it. I feel like if if that was V
like I'm sure these are letters that he had.
One time yet. Yeah, but you see a collection
put together? I would die.
I would be kind of embarrassing but also colored.
Yeah, how who liked, who got these?
The guy that wrote this book, I guess, contacted his
ex-girlfriend's, some of them were willing to give them to
nice at. So, many leaves them must have
been a good lover yet true. I think he was Okay.
Wall Street Journal wrote about this book in said that Obama
comes off in the letters. Is quote, pretty much what you'd
expect from any 20-something introvert.
Self-contained self-absorbed, and prone to overwrap Pros.
Buddhist might be cringing right now, is any of us would?
But Moran has told us Wednesday. He had no qualms about
publishing details, about the young lovers.
The book is after all biography. He said the letters and diary
entries are more perceptive than salacious.
I want to read that. Yeah.
And you can actually look see pictures like Scans of the
letters and Obama's handwriting looked really nice.
It was like cursive very elegant.
That's really sweet. Oh my gosh, I guess I do today.
Someone could publish like a book of like Texas legends that
you've sent, that would be terrible, but legally they could
write. I don't know.
I don't know how that works. I mean, what's the difference
between that? And I don't know, water, I
guess. That's crazy.
How do we know he didn't didn't fake the letters though?
Yeah you're right. I don't know about those moments
is though 1982, he had a Summer Romance with a girl named.
Alex mcneir, go ahead, call a smart blond.
Hmm, there were nine letters in the book sent by Obama to Alex
mcneir. And they're actually at Emory
University today where they will be placed in an archive which I
just think is Crazy because he's still alive.
I know, you know, we talked about Jane Austen Museum, you
can read her letters. It's just so weird.
Like, he could go to the museum because he's own letter.
He wrote to an ex-girlfriend. I'm just kind of weird for
Michelle. Yeah, yeah.
She Alex, when he wrote in her journal about him, she said I
know this isn't Michelle but like we can't get this from
Michelle. So I just wanted to read it.
I don't know Forever, cover him and his ex-girlfriend's.
I'll bet Alex wrote the sexual of warmth.
Is definitely there but this is her journal but the rest of it
has sharp edges, though, he speak sweet words and can be
open and trusting. There's also that coolness and I
begin to have an inkling of some things about him that could get
to me. Baraka still intrigues me but so
much going on beneath the surface Out Of Reach guarded
controlled who seems like he has it got like his walls Upton is
complex complex food. Sadly that year his father died
actually Really in a car accident and it was his third
car accident. It seems like, he'd been kind of
Reckless drinking and things Brock and seen him since he was
10, as I said. So it was very complicated for
him. Yeah, that's like in the book,
he wrote In 1995 Dreams of My Father, but we're not there yet.
After Alex mcneir in the early 80s when he was in New York.
He dated a girl named Genevieve cook and according to that
writer, David maraniss Heath says that this was Barack
Steepest romantic relationship of his young life.
Both of them had couldn't coincidentally lived in
Indonesia as children and moved around a lot.
So they bonded over that she had diary pages and stuff, too.
I feel. So, like salacious saying this,
but in the diary, she talked about doing cocaine with rock my
God, Pretty crazy, she bought? She said he didn't really do it
that much. He said, for every five lines of
someone did, he would have done half?
Okay. Seems like he was giving in to
peer pressure. Oh, some wondered the relevance
of including this in the book and the author said my job as a
historian is to recount. What they believe is important.
And neither, I nor they can control the Tabloid journalists
who are so preoccupied with sex, and largely disinterested in his
political record. Hmm, it's a cop out.
He's like Hi, yeah, I put it in there but I can't help.
But people are interested in. Yeah, no, it's true.
I've just say like with the JFK episode, we talked about how
Carolyn did. Yeah.
So can I saw me? He taught people like stop
judging them. Like I'm not judging them at
all. I'm their young people.
Yeah, I mean, I think Coke can be a dangerous drug but it's
just kind of exciting to hear about.
Yeah. I'm not just because it's weird
that people would assume that just because we're Saying
someone did Coke that I'm saying that they're a bad person or
something. It's just interesting.
I mean, he became the president, it's just interesting to me but
yeah I can sit down to hang. Yeah, I mean I don't do Coke but
like I don't I'm getting nervous than when I think it's cool.
You know what it's whatever. I don't know.
It is it make? It is a risky drugs.
I'm not like making light of it. Yes no I'm not like I'm not
hurting people to do it. I just think it's like it's nice
to see know I do actually it just shows how human exoti.
Exactly. That's what this shows about
that in the thing, okay? But then he moved to Chicago to
become a community organizer, and they broke up, he dated and
I-95. I dated someone else named
Sheila, miyoshi either Jagger or Yeager, I'm not sure how you
pronounce it. She is Japanese and Dutch.
So, I don't know if she pronounces it as Yeager or
Jagger, but he actually proposed Used to Sheila, what she said?
No, oh my goodness, not yet. And did they stay dating?
They did State dating. But I read, I don't know how
people know this that apparently he tried to focus more on work.
After she said, you know, I really think it would be hard to
continue dating someone after they rejected a proposal.
Yeah. And I read also, but at one
point, Obama attempted to end their relationship because in
this confuses me. Because why did he propose It
doesn't really make sense to me, but apparently he attempted to
end their relationship because of race.
Sheila was white or like, half Japanese, half Dutch and people,
claimed that Obama believed that marrying a white woman would
hurt his credibility as an African-American politician.
Oh wow. According to one of his
biographers David Garrow when Brock was in at Chicago, there
was a local African-American Blake black state, Senator
Richard. Her new house who is very well
known figure and everyone in the black community.
Believe that he couldn't pursue further political life because
he had a white wife and that Barack Obama was aware of that
and considered it a problem for black politician to be married
to a white woman. I, I know that's like the
reality, but it's sad that people have to consider that I
know where his two other past girlfriends white as well.
One of them definitely was but I'm not sure about the other
one. Yeah, I'm not sure Obama
apparently told a friend, the line.
Very clearly drawn. If I'm going out with a white
woman, I have no standing here. Just an interesting.
It is interesting, too, because he is half white as well, you
know, mmm, after Barack and Michelle Obama married.
He apparently did keep in contact with Steelo occasional
letter. Apparently, there was one after
the 9/11 attacks and a phone call in 2012.
Oh, well, because he reached out to ask whether a biographer had
contacted her. Oh interesting.
It's like it. David crazy.
You're getting a call from your ex your ex is also the president
that is crazy because you can walk there.
Yes. What things to get a call from
an ex but to be the president. Oh my God.
Okay. That was also be crazy for your
ex to be the president. Yeah.
Because then they're like your president and you have to see
them all the time and every time there's omigod National
disaster, something. On the TV and there he is.
That is crazy. Sheila today is a professor at
Oberlin College, so it seems like he really likes SMART
Girls. Mmm.
Yeah, nice. I like to see that.
So he went to Harvard Law, he's actually the first black
president of Harvard Law and he studied there from 1988 to 1991,
and during the summer at Harvard, he was an associate at
sidley, Austin LLP in Chicago, where he first met Michelle
Robinson. Okay, so it's 1989.
Michelle was a 25 year. Old attorney at sidley.
Austin assigned is brocks Mentor at their Law Firm.
He was 27, so he's older. But she was actually above him.
Oh, I love that. Hmm, and they met at work.
Isn't that crazy? People always say don't take
your coworker but you know what seems like it works out
sometimes. Yeah.
I mean it makes sense because that's where spending most of
your time. Yeah, yeah, I feel like if
Really have feelings for someone.
Just go for it. I think the best way to meet
people are in situations where you're forced to be there.
Yeah, yeah, totally, yeah. So they were paired together
like she was paired as his mentor apparently because they
both went to Harvard. And in his Memoir, a Promised
Land Obama said he was smitten with her from the start.
He wrote, she was tall, beautiful, funny outgoing,
gently so many adjectives. She was tall, beautiful, funny,
outgoing generous and wickedly smart and I was spitting with.
Her from almost a second. I saw her she has said to Good
Morning America once, and then in walks, Barack Obama and
Brock. Obama has always walked like,
Barack Obama, like he's got all the time in the world and I was
like, dude, you're cute. But in my mind, I was like
off-limits, I'm not going to date one of the few black summer
Associates. She told Good Morning America.
I have my suspicions when a bunch of white folks Fawn all
over black man because I sort of think, okay, he can talk
straight so they think he's wonderful.
So that was my theory and his name is was Barack And he's from
Hawaii, I thought what, you know.
So I didn't really know what to expect.
So I guess a month in of him being at sidley, Austin, he
asked her on a date and apparently she said, well, she
has said about this, no way. This is completely tacky.
I don't know what she said. She won't probably didn't say
that to him, but she said, no, not once those.
I think of him, as someone I'd want to date, she wrote in her
Memoir becoming for one thing. I was his mentor at the firm.
I also recently sworn off dating altogether, too.
Consumed with work to put any effort into it.
So yeah, he asked her out she said, no but apparently he asked
again. That's six alot of God, which is
persistent. And they did go on a date.
They went to the Art Institute of Chicago, and they went on a
stroll and they saw the movie do the right thing.
And Michelle said about this night, we clicked right away by
the end of the date. It was over.
I was sold. And Barack told oh magazine
Oprah, I treated her to the finest.
Ice cream. Baskin Robbins had to offer our
dinner table doubling as the curb.
I kissed her and it tasted like chocolate.
Oh, he's cute. He's cute.
I cannot I wish I could but I cannot have ice cream on a date.
Why not? My lactose intolerant.
See, I know I should you're so good to always be carrying that
around with you. Yeah, I mean I know I'm gonna
get a stomachache so I'm not gonna.
Yeah. I mean, there's a lot of vegan
flavors these days. That's true.
There's actually a memorial to their first day in Chicago at
the site of the This box back in Robins, I guess.
Wow. Yeah I know I don't think they
will jumping ahead but no, there's actually a movie about
their first date called there's a whole movie.
I'm gonna find like a short film or a movie movie.
There's a movie about their first date called the south side
with you. Oh my God, I don't really get
how you can make a whole movie. One day, I was The trailer and
it just, I don't know. I don't get what the conflict
would be. Maybe the fact that he asked her
out and she said, no him working up the guts to ask her again
that. I don't know how you stretched
out into a feature film though. Yeah, it seems like it takes
place in one day too, so I don't know.
Maybe it's like a Before Sunset tape.
Maybe. Yeah, maybe there isn't really a
plot but, yeah, check that out if you're interested in
interested, guys. So yeah, then then they're
dating They're together, he's still in law school.
Michelle actually left the law firm because she was feeling
like she need more fulfillment. It was like to corporate, I
don't know, she wanted to help people.
And so she ended up holding public sector positions in
Chicago city government as an assistant to the mayor and
assistant Commissioner of planning and development.
And then she worked for public allies which is a non-profit
according to the book Rising Star.
He was Obama was still seeing his ex-wife, Sheila
occasionally, but things must have gotten more serious because
July 31st 1991, they became engaged at Gordon's restaurant
in Chicago and the dinner was actually to celebrate Obama
passing. The bar exam from Harvard and
this is what Michelle has said about it.
She said, as we were reaching the end of the meal, Barack
smiled at me and raise the subject of marriage.
He raised my hand and said that as much as he loved me with his
whole being, he still didn't really see the point instantly,
I felt the blood rise in my cheeks, it was like pushing a
button and me the kind of big blinking red button.
You might find in some sort of nuclear facilities around by
warning signs and evacuation Maps.
Really, we are going to do this now, and apparently, they had a
whole heated discussion about marriage and like the
institution of it, if it's worth it, whatever.
And he was saying he didn't see the point, and she was saying
that was important to her, whatever.
And then eventually Actually the waiter came around holding a
dessert plate. Covered by sliver lid.
He slid it out. In front of me and lifted the
cover. I was almost to miffed even look
down, but when I did, I saw a Dark Velvet box that where
chocolate cake was supposed to be inside was a diamond ring.
Brock looked at me playfully. He'd baited me.
It was all it had all been a ruse.
It took me a second to dismantle my anger and slide into joyful
shock. He dragged me up because this
was the very last time. He would invoke his inane
marriage argument ever again. As long as we both shall live, I
can almost picture that being the movie.
Like, I'm sure this whole intellectual conversation about
marriage and then you go back into like flashbacks of, like,
both of their like parents, like, you know, and then you cut
to The conversation again this candle light and it's like very
romantic and you know what I mean?
Yeah. And maybe and ends of the
proposal I wonder if it is in the movie guys I'm sorry I
didn't see it but you know I mean I didn't want to get
confused about what's real and not.
That's so true. Yeah I think it's I think it's
very tricky to sometimes see the yeah fictional interpretations.
Yeah. Like I saw that talk about the
gene, Austin won again but watch it after and I feel like if I
did watch it before, I might have liked it would have
influence and too hyped about how cute they were.
Yeah exactly. Yeah, that's pretty risky of him
though. Like what if she actually got
pissed and like stormed off? I know that is really cold but
it seems like like teasing is a part of their yeah, Dynamic
later that year. Sadly Michelle's father passed
away, he died from complications.
Asians with MS. And her friend Suzanne include
died that year to from cancer. Oh, that's awful.
I know. So must have been a tough year.
Yeah, that happens sometimes. It's like you're having a really
horrible time and then a good thing happens to like, you could
become engaged such as life, I guess.
Whoa, this is really loud right now.
Many Friday nights. Yeah that's terrific.
We don't usually record on Friday.
Yeah. October 3rd 1992 after whether
Barack and Michelle married at Trinity unit, I married at
Trinity United Church in Chicago and they honeymooning in
California and they ended up moving in together in Hyde Park
neighborhood of Chicago. Hmm.
And I didn't know this Brock was actually professor at University
of Chicago Law School. Cool.
And he directed the Illinois vote project, according to the
book Rising Star by that author Garrow from their first day of
marriage up until 2004 Michelle is, very dubious and challenging
about his political prospects. But it is as a state senator or
in a congressional race, he enters all those campaigns over
Michelle's objection. She once told him you had you
would have more impact being high school principal.
So up through 2004 Michelle is not a significant.
Wounds on his political career because a she's opposed to it
and be she's taking no active part only after he wins the
Senate nomination, she begins to do some campaigning.
Wow, that's pretty late. Oh, I mean a senate campaign is
pretty big. Yeah.
Yeah, I know is interesting like em in my research about them, it
seemed like she was a little hesitant about him getting into
politics and didn't think that it would work out and, I mean,
it does. Yeah, it rarely works out for so
many people, I guess. So, So lucky.
Yeah, but he became the president, he definitely is more
of an optimist and she's a little bit more.
Pessimist. Yeah.
Kind of their Dynamic 1996 Michelle worked as the associate
dean of student services at the University of Chicago.
Just saying what she's up to. I mean, she was like, she was a
boss. Like she was a really smart
lady. She was really ambitious.
So it's kind of weird that I don't know.
She ends up just becoming like, the first lady.
Yeah, I mean that's an amazing thing but like He was doing
things on her own to, you know. Yeah, exactly.
Like she's known through her husband.
Yeah. In a lot of interviews.
People are like, wow, you know, you grew up in the south side,
then you became the first lady but I feel like she almost
achieved bigger things than that.
But yeah, the first lady isn't really your own achievement and
just kind of like happen. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, it is. You're married to the president
like any, like, spouse could achieve that.
Yeah, but she was doing really impressive stuff.
Tough. Also in 1996, Barack is elected
to the Illinois state senate, for the 13th District 1998.
They had their first child Malia and Obama.
Born July 4th, but that's so American.
Oh wow. Did I wonder if she'll get into
politics apparently before Malia?
Michelle had suffered some miscarriages?
Hmm. Sorry to bring the mood down but
that is sad. I had heard that before.
They did IVF right? Yeah they did IVF.
This is so later in life back to this thing, Michelle said she
couldn't stand Obama for 10 years after their children were
born. Mmm.
And I am going to talk about this even more later, but she
said the tension between them stemmed from measuring tasks
like, how many diapers each changed until she realized that?
This she's had this many times marriage isn't 50/50 ever?
Oh, wow, she says, she seems to really like this philosophy.
She's come up with but it's not fifty-fifty that sometimes one
person is giving more than the other but that it changes all
the time. Like sometimes, like when he was
really busy, maybe he was only putting in like 30 inches, you
doing 70, but then there's been times when he does more and like
I don't know she seems very adamant that like you shouldn't
expect it to always be balanced because yeah that's true.
Nikki frustrated. I mean yeah because it's a nose
in life. Like you yourself might have
higher demands and somebody else.
Yeah. Or vice versa like you know,
there's times in your life really.
You don't think they're like, pretty like, easy right now.
Yeah, you wouldn't really need as much from somebody else.
Yeah. Seems like she was, and that
might be why she wasn't excited about him getting into politics
because she was getting frustrated.
Like, you know, I have a job and I'm trying to take care of the
kid and you. Yeah.
Off trying to be a politician like what the hell, I think I
would be really. Well you're all staying very
sleep-deprived to. Yeah, she has also said that
it's important to know your person in order to get through
those rough. Patches.
Yeah. She said, do you like him?
I mean, you could be a mad at him, but do you still look at
him and go? I'm not happy with you but I
respect you. I don't agree with you, but
you're still a kind smart person.
And you think that isn't? Yeah.
It's like it's a, you really have to look past the
day-to-day? Yeah.
And seeing the whole picture. Yeah, I'm saying this like, I
know like I've been I'm married for 30 years, but like if you
are pissed at someone, can you still think I like them as a
person. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, definitely need that as a base level.
So jumping ahead a bit in 2001. They have their daughter
Natasha. Also known as Sasha.
I did not know that. Her real name was Natasha.
No, I didn't either did not. Yep.
Sasha born, July 10th very close.
Yeah. Okay.
Then you know I'm really skipping ahead here, but, you
know, politics Munich, campaigning all this stuff
Obama, because I became the US, senator for Illinois, 2004
putting the family in the spotlight.
And at this time, Michelle was the vice president for community
and external Affairs at the University of Chicago hospitals.
Later in life. Michelle told the black New
Station Revolt TV? Oh yeah.
This is what I was talking about.
She said There Were Ten Years. I couldn't stand my husband and
guess when it happened, when those kids were little, people
think I'm being catty by saying this.
And it's like, There Were Ten Years.
I couldn't stand my husband for ten years.
While we were trying to build their careers and, you know,
worrying about school and who's doing what, and what I was like,
this isn't even This is what I already said, basically, but and
guess what? Married isn't 50/50 ever.
There are times. I'm 70.
He's 30 this time, see 60/40, but guess what?
10 years have been married Thirty, I would take 10 bad
years over 30. It's just how you look at it and
people give up saying five years, I can't take it.
So I hope it's a little bit closer to 5050.
Now that I know both out of the White House is.
Yeah, it seems like they're kind of chilling.
I wondered to like, if she's kind of exaggerating, Like was
it actually non-stop 10 years of like misery?
No. Yeah, I don't think that's how I
think. They probably just had a lot of
fight down. Yeah, she she has said this a
lot. It's like many interviews.
This can't couldn't stand. My husband thing comes up.
I actually came across it on this subreddit.
This isn't where I discovered it anything, but it was for men
going through divorce and they Saying that if a man said this,
it would be terrible and that it's so not.
Okay, that women can talk about their husbands like this.
What do you think? Like what?
I don't know. I mean, maybe because he's the
president knew but like, I couldn't stand my wife, but I do
feel like mankind has say stuff like that.
Maybe, not at that directly. But like, it's been an age-old
thing where you hear about, you know, like men are getting
married. They're about to lose their
freedom, their yeah. Going to be nagging though.
I can change. Yes, exactly that phrase.
So, you know, I think I think men do it too.
Yeah, definitely. Yeah, yeah.
I mean I do think there might be more of a phenomenon where women
get together and kind of shit on their husbands but I don't know,
I mean I haven't been in the room when a bunch of guys are
alone together. We be scared.
If I know this is like really heteronormative but we're saying
yeah but that's just what some guys that in a men divorce.
That's really cute that these men are Like out of nowhere.
Well, I was just searching like I searched Michelle Obama, can't
stand my husband, oh, and I was just looking at all the
different results and then I just came across the I'm
excited. Yeah, no II wasn't just on that.
And then, and then that inspired the whole episode that would be
like a good If you're a writer something again I'm the some
time and some real there of people's problems that you don't
relate to at all. Just try to the you don't, you
don't figure out what people are going through.
It's really interesting, okay? Then in 2007, February 2007,
Obama announces that he's running for president and
Michelle wrote about this in her book.
Becoming I said, yes though I was at the same time harboring,
a painful thought when I wasn't ready to share I supported him
and campaigning I also felt certain he wouldn't make it all
the way he spoke so often and so passionately of here.
Healing, our country's divisions appealing to a set of higher
ideals, he believed were in a tin most people, but I'd seen
enough of the divisions to temper, my own hopes.
Barack was a black man in America.
After all, I didn't really think he could win.
Hmm. You know, she's protective of
him and she's trying to be realistic and I can get why she
would think that, you know? Yeah.
I mean there's never been one before.
Yeah, exactly. Actly, very few people can when
the president is really truly. She also said that she wasn't
very excited about the idea of him becoming president.
Because she also didn't want to change, she didn't want to move.
Yeah, she didn't want to have to get new friends, all that but
she also didn't want to hold back Barack from the incredible
things he could do. It's also, I mean that's like a
huge sacrifice that she's my day.
It is huge. I wonder if she said No, like
what he actually not do it. I know.
Yeah. How do you even?
I can't even fathom. Like, how do you even get
yourself in a position where you're like?
I'm gonna run for president now. Thank you.
I mean, he worked his way up. I hated the show.
This is of, this is us like the way they ended it.
The character Randall. They were like acting like he's
going to be president one day. It's like and it almost was
like, kind of like mimicking Obama.
I felt like, in a sense, like, I don't know, but It's like it's
so rare that somebody gets to that point.
Like, yeah, it's such a student teeny.
Tiny percentage of people are the president, like what are the
odds? Yeah, you're going to be in that
situation. That's crazy.
How do you hold somebody back from that though?
Yeah, but also, you have to really love somebody to go
through that time to like, put your family in the spotlight and
also, it's really scary. Yeah, I mean presidents have
been assassinated as we've talked about.
Yeah. And he's the first black
president. Denied.
Imagine that like added to the Society of like, you know, like
Martin Luther King was assassinated.
Like there's a lot of racist people out there, that's really
scary. It is scary.
She just she still had like a really respectful job, though
mean, she was the executive director at the Chicago
hospitals and vice president of community and external Affairs
for Chicago. So, you know, she had to give
that up too. I'm just kind of stinks, but I
mean, maybe, I don't know. I really gotta be like, okay,
I'm done. But she was a very ambitious
lady at the time, Obama said of his relationship to Ebony
magazine. He said, well, I realized as I
get older is that Michelle is less concerned about me giving
her flowers and she is that I'm doing things that are hard for
me, carving out, time that to her is proof evidence that I'm
thinking about her seems like acts of service and quality
time. Our hurry up is her lovely gift.
Not gifts. Yeah.
Yes, mine is gift. Yeah. - to really didn't know
that giving gifts. Okay.
But I also feel like receiving gifts.
I feel like we've talked about this on the podcast.
It seems like he is words of affirmation.
Yeah, he loves were. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Totally. There is a party going on
upstairs right now. So if it's in the background
guys, just that's what's going on, anyway.
Way 2008. Barack Obama became the
president, he beat John McCain. Who was running with Sarah
Palin. Remember that in the white
house? Once they were in the white
house I think a lot of us remember that Michelle LED an
initiative called. Let's move to address the
childhood obesity epidemic and I think every kid in America
remembers when their school lunches changed.
Yeah. That was tough.
Yeah. That was tough to school lunch
before. That was really Good.
Meaning unhealthy. Yeah, it's kind of cool though
in a way that you could actually see the effect of something that
she did. Yes, you really did make a
difference. You didn't think that like at
least my school and I went to a pretty good public school.
Like making the school lunches. Healthier didn't really add
actual healthy food. It just like made the food
really plain, and Bland and gross.
Yeah. Well, Probably couldn't control
all the schools and what they did.
So yeah, they're in the white house now.
Oh my God. He's a president, they're living
in d.c., he's a president, it's crazy.
And, you know, obviously a lot of things happened during his
time in the white house, but I can't get into all of it in his
Memoir about the time of the White House.
He wrote, this is about his relationship and yet despite
Michelle's, success and popularity, I continue to I
sense an undercurrent of tension in her subtle, but constant,
like the faint thrum of a hidden machine, it was as if confined
as we were within the walls of the White House.
All her previous sources of frustration, became more
concentrated more Vivid, whether it was my round-the-clock
absorption with work or the way politics exposed, our family to
scrutiny and attacks or the tendency of, even friends and
family to treat her role as secondary importance.
My next to Michelle in the dark. I think about those days when
everything between I felt lighter when her smile was more
constant, in our love less encumbered.
In my heart was suddenly tighten at the thought that those days
might not return. Oh my God, he's a really good
writer. He's really good.
Wow, I'm attracted to him, that's like, yeah, I'm YouTube.
That's funny. Sweet that he would lie awake in
bed and ache for the days of the early American officials bag
because it's kind of his fault. But there's nothing you can do.
That's really considerate though.
Because even thinking about that, A lot of men wouldn't it's
sad to say. It does seem like they're
married, wasn't the best one. They were in the White House.
Yeah. Even though there were a lot of
really cute moments between them, you know, speeches made
and the inauguration and everything but it was definitely
a stressful time. Speaking of in January, the new
sworn in couple made the whole country Swoon during only about
the whole country but we made the whole country's moon during
the inaugural ball. Especially as their first dance
to at last as performed by Beyonce.
Hello has my love. All right.
I love is romantic and I guess during this event, Brock said,
first of all, how good-looking is my wife asked the Crowd.
Oh, Michelle said an interview around this time on their
marriage. It's unfair to the institution
of marriage and it's unfair for you.
Young people who are trying to build something to project.
This Perfection that doesn't exist.
This image of a Flawless relationship is the last thing
that we want to project he is steady, has he made me mad?
Yes. Does he sometimes do things that
I don't like? Absolutely.
But as a human being he has never disappointed and I would
hope he could say his him about me.
Yeah, I think like what I'm getting from her is like order
to make it work as you have to know somebody's character.
Yeah and when somebody messes up or they annoy you You have to
say, is this a reflection of their character or is this just
who they are? In this moment?
Yeah, because everyone messes up, especially when things are
stressful. You know.
I know I feel like she's so honest which I appreciate ya
doesn't have to do that. Actually, I think I get the
sense that you do have a good marriage but she's just being so
honest. Yeah, exactly.
You know, I mean who has a perfect marriage?
Maybe nobody. I don't think anyone does.
I don't think you can expect. Perfection from anything.
Oh. Oh the closer you get to any
relationship like you can see it's cracks.
I think that that's how the light gets in today is my
parents 33rd wedding anniversary.
Congrats, but my mom like me to post, it's like from the
outside. You'd be like not that they have
a bad marriage but like the outside you would think like wow
this is so like cute and love you Daddy.
And I was just thinking like, you know, it's like I lived in
the same house. He had a perfect marriage, but I
really admire about Michelle Obama, That she does seem so
concerned about young people in that inner Asian.
I really admire that so much. It's just so nice that she's
like, I don't want to make people feel bad.
I was thinking that I don't have a marriage like Barack and
Michelle. It's like, no, like this is a
tough marriage to even though it looks great.
Yeah, I appreciate I feel like, that's too because she has two
daughters that she, like, always thinks of things of like, yeah.
The other girls, like what would they?
I mean, boys to be like yeah, specifically.
It seems like she's really interested in like young girls.
Yeah. What they would think.
So thoughtful. Mmm, barack's book to the New
Yorker in 2009 to and more about him lying in bed.
He said there are times when we are lying in bed and I look over
and sort of have a start because I realized here is this other
person who is separate and different and has a different
memories and backgrounds and thoughts and feelings, it's that
tension between familiarity and mystery.
That makes four I think strong because even as you build a life
of trust and comfort and mutual support you retain some sense of
surprise or wonder about the other person.
That's so sweet. Right.
He has such a way with that. Is so true, though.
I mean, it is so freaky. When you look at someone you're
like wait, I have no idea where thank you got your.
Like I don't even know what's going on.
You have a whole different brain.
Yeah, real person, o KZ. You just like a of my
imagination. Yeah, I do.
Things like even. I mean I haven't I haven't been
in Long relationships like that but, you know, you think, you
know, someone so well. But you can always have that
thought, like ways. Like I actually don't know what.
Yeah, it with anybody really. I think I know someone so well,
but they have so many memories without me so many experiences,
they know people who I don't know.
Like, yeah. There's gonna be nobody who
like, ya know so. Well, like you can always keep
learning something about somebody else.
Yeah, you just have to tap into it.
Always some mystery. Yeah, just have to remember.
Yeah, 2010, Michelle told Good Housekeeping when the kids go to
bed and after he's done a little reading, we're usually curled up
in our den and we'll watch a show together or we'll talk and
catch up. It's nothing major.
But that's what marriage is about.
Not the big splashy stuff. Mmm, that's so true.
That's what Miranda needed to realize.
Oh, on second on the city. Yeah, just like that.
Oh, my gosh. Is it go?
God yeah we just sitting on the couch eating ice cream.
Watching foreign films like lucky.
Yes, Miranda go, cute, your husband is and you're watching
for first of all, it's hard to get someone to watch more films.
Okay. I know everyone's super and they
had a little like ice cream sundae set up leaving the ice
cream sundae bar like that's a really sweet.
Wait do you know One season 2 comes out?
I think soon. We should do our protest.
I know we should be really should I commented on the
Justice for Steve we're talking about in just like that the Sex
and the City away boot which we did not like justice for Steve
the way they treated that poor man, that bartender.
I next see bartender I have you know what I'm going to design.
A poster was just gonna be like a Word document, they absolutely
nothing girl, she knows how to finger somebody.
He was a bartender in the naive forgets.
How to do, you know what a Sure on Sex and the City he was a
great lover. Anybody know how to do it.
It's not that hard I know but wasn't he a great lover?
Yes I think he wanted all of a sudden.
Well I was uh they acted legislator he's not they
accidentally she never he never satisfied her, you know, I just
hated how they rewrote it. Like I know how to do some like
but it's like they had to change their love story in order to
give Miranda this new love story and so obsessed would not
recommend I know. You is I told my mom, it was
like terrible, but then she ended up enjoying it really.
I think, as I said the bar so low.
Yeah. That's like this movie.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Were you like not as taken aback
by the sequel? Or was it someone else a movie?
Yeah, yeah yeah. Let the movie wasn't that great
but it was enjoyable, I guess. Yeah.
I thought the second one was so
bad. I know it's better than the show
though. Yeah.
Believe it or not. And just like Like that.
Yeah, but yeah. Anyway anyway, um, and I've
heard an interviews and conversations between the two of
them that apparently, he, you know, wouldn't he would walk
into the residential part of the White House?
He would just kind of turn off work just pretty amazing.
Wow. Yeah, like, I'd be very hard to
compartmentalize. Yeah, 2012 Obama was re-elected.
Election day was November 6th. So I just It's my birthday is
November 18th. I remember that.
Yeah, she got the next election baby.
Yeah, on my birthday. I was born on Election Day, so
just happens a lot. So annoying.
Anyway, he's re-elected Michelle's still doing her
advocating for healthy, eating Children's Health.
I guess she was working for hospitals me, that's kind of how
she got into all that in Chicago.
Oh yeah that makes sense. This is not really.
Irrelevant. But I also read that.
She really grew the gardening at the White House and they
actually used the food that they grew in the White House and the
kitchen and stuff. That's cool.
Beehives there. And yeah, she's kind of a food.
Hippie would be really so weird to live in the way.
I know I kind of hate it because it's, like not your home.
I feel like it is your home, but like, I guess you do have people
who can do like all the. It's not like you have to be the
ones like putting up wallpaper. Yeah.
You don't really feel like, oh,
I did all this work. And now, you know, they're going
to re renovate it, but you can't like long-term plan for stuff.
I think it's an interesting phenomenon that The president
gets to live in this house and it's very lavish and everything,
but it's almost like they're renting and then yeah, it's
incorrect family. It's so it's kind of weird.
Yeah. It's like the person and a lot
of presidents like actually don't are not a lot of them, but
they have like a secondary house as well.
Yeah, Michelle reflected on their life together at the
Democratic National Convention, prior to the election.
Instead our life before, moving to Washington was filled with
simple, Joys Saturdays, at soccer games.
Sundays at Grandma's house in a day.
Date night for Barack and me was either dinner or a movie because
as an exhausted mom, I couldn't stay awake for both.
And the truth is, I loved the life we had built for our girls.
I deeply love the man that I had built this life with and I
didn't want that to change. If he became president, I loved
Barack just the way he was. You see, even though back then
Brock was a Senator and a presidential candidate to me, he
was still the guy who picked me up for our dates in a car.
That was so rusted out that I could actually see the pavement
going through the hole in the passenger side door.
He was the guy Proudest possession was a coffee table.
He'd found in a dumpster and whose only pair of decent shoes.
Was half a size too small so I don't know.
Just seems like she misses the simpler times.
Yeah. And that is facts.
Like you never actually would go back to those times you can
never just sit openly out of soccer, field long.
And I know, I mean, once you're the president, yeah, we're your
Anonymous to people. I mean, you're at soccer game,
you're going to have secret service now.
Yeah, we're gonna be watching you, they're gonna have cameras.
I know, I think she was very lucky in a way to get to
experience. All this mean to be married with
the president. Oh my God, but I do feel a
little bit bad too. Yeah.
Like it was hard time. Okay, so I was trying to see if
there was like anything, you know, salacious or suspicious
about their marriage. The only thing I really found
interesting in 2014, there were rumors that Obama was having an
affair. With Beyonce, okay, I'm gonna
say no French, okay, this isn't just you know thing.
Now the French photographer, Pascal Rothstein claimed to have
a picture of them and said this, he said to a French publication.
He said you know, at this time the United States, there's
something big this happening, it'll go out tomorrow in the
Washington Post, we can say that it is not the gutter press and
alleged Affair between President, Barack Obama and
Beyonce, but that never happened did It come out in the
Washington Post and it is interesting that the week that
this rumor came out from this French photographer.
The French President Francois Holland had visited the White
House and he had been embroiled in his own media, friends and
has. He had an affair with a French
actress. Oh yay.
So it's almost like they're trying to like do a spin-off.
Yeah, an American American president is doing it to.
Yeah. Yeah.
It I don't think it's true, but it is interesting that there was
an actual guy that claimed to have this like it, guess it's
possible. Now, I'm trying to picture them
like making out. It's possible that you know this
guy did have a picture and that he's paid off or something, but
it is weird because Michelle has talked so highly of Beyonce.
Yeah, that's what I was going to say and I feel like Beyonce
probably thinks very highly of Michelle.
Yeah. And the they have spent time
together the four of them. I mean, Brock Michelle Beyonce
and Jay-Z have hung out, they know each other, but I just find
it hard to believe that Michelle would love Beyonce so much.
If that, yeah, exactly. I just can't picture you.
I think he's no good but I mean, they're both the trial.
He's gonna cheat with someone. Like I don't think it's true but
a Beyonce that answer and I know, you know, it is so like,
oh Jeff came early. Monroe.
Like oh, yeah, that's true. That's true.
But I don't believe it. Yeah, it seems like Beyonce and
Michelle are tight, so I know. Yeah.
Just thought I'd let you guys know, like, maybe a Beyonce.
Was it really mad at Jay's? You could do is, he's cheating
on her a lot like, oh, you know what?
Well, I'm gonna fuck the president but I don't think I
don't think. Yeah, I don't think that she
would do that either. Mmm, move gun to my head.
I would say it's not true. Yeah, You know what?
That's the crazy thing that we've talked about stuff like
that probably has happened. Yeah, that nobody knows about.
I know that's a crazy thing. There's probably been some so
many hookups between famous people that would probably blow
our mind. Probably, I wish we could know
2015, Michelle attended a panel for Glamour magazine.
And she said, you don't want to be with a boy who's too stupid
to appreciate a smart young lady.
I want to encourage. All of us, young women.
As older women, we have to raise our own bars.
If I had worried about who liked me and he thought I was cute
when I was your age, I wouldn't be married to the president of
the United States today. Hmm, okay.
So then 2016, their time in the White House comes to an end.
You know what, had to happen someday in this country you can
only serve two terms. So yeah, before leaving the
White House Michelle was on Stephen Colbert and he showed a
picture of her and Brock to him. And she did an impression of
him. The thought was kind of funny,
so I'm going to play it, but I still need to talk to you about
this picture which when it was released burned the internet to
the ground. Yeah.
What do you guys food? You know, we liked you already
didn't have to release this. Photograph.
Know what are you guys saying to each other there?
How did this moment come about know?
Barack is horrible in photo shoots because and I hate doing
photo shoots with him. So I'm sure right there, I would
think, would you just be patient and stop?
Don't rush the photographer, exactly.
Yeah, I think we got the shot. Can I go?
And it's like no you can't go
just beep. That was exactly.
Brock has two smiles. You know for a photo it's like
this smile or the smile and he just sort of like I think we're
done. We have it.
Then it's like no we didn't. These photographers.
They've been setting up for hours.
He comes in. It's like I think I can give you
five minutes. So I was trying to convince him
to just chill out and relax and so they caught that discussion.
That's what's happening right now.
This is just one more photograph, just one more
photograph. Yeah, it was hard to get to
stand for a photograph, your husband or your children.
Oh, my husband without a doubt. I mean, well, yeah him.
Yeah, he's he's stuck. No, she were going to say him or
Bo and sunny, well him, that smile, that was pretty good
impression. Your husband.
Do you do an impression of your husband?
We all three of us. Have good impressions of Barack,
would you mind sharing a little bit busy at the dinner table?
Because you know, and Malia will start it because she usually ask
the serious question. Will Dad tell us about your day?
Oh, and what about that conversation on global warming.
And Barack the Sasha and I are like, oh God, no, don't get him
started. He's like, well, no I'm glad
you. I'm glad you asked that.
Let me just Let me just answer that in 3 points 1 and then 1, a
and then one, A, and B and Sasha and I are like a professor.
Can I audit if lecture? Because Sasha and I want to talk
about our favorite song on lemonade album.
That's what we want to talk about.
Exactly, I heard you say about the president that he leaves the
job at the door. When he comes into the
residential part of the White House, he does that really
Because I can't leave my job of the door.
How does he need that at the door?
You know, at least our time together because when he first
walks in we have dinner it's usually dinner time.
So that's the time when unless Malia asked him about his work
which we try not to have her, do it's all about the kids.
You know, how are your days? What's going on?
What's the latest gossip? He's really into gossip, so you
can get them really focused because he doesn't have a life.
No, but he's got the NSA and he can find out what any of us are
thinking those pretty funny. That was funny.
Whoa. You see, I'm glad you asked.
It's got Points. 11? A?
Yeah. If he does really like a picture
that. Yeah, me too.
And she brought it the lemonade album.
Yeah. Oh yeah.
Beyonce. Yeah happened.
Yeah. No.
I don't see would. No no.
Yeah she would have an inkling. Yeah.
Just the silly rumor. Yeah.
So then generally 2017 Brock is doing his farewell speech
leaving the White House and he thanked Michelle actually in
teared up and I'm going to play this to some of you here tonight
or watching at home. You were there with us in 2004
and 2008 2012. Maybe you still can't believe we
pulled this whole thing off. Let me tuck you're not the only
ones Michelle. Michelle Lavon Robinson, girl of
the south side. For the fans for the past 25
years, you have not only been my wife and mother of my children,
you have been my best friend. You took on a role, you didn't
ask for. and you made it your own with Grace and with grit and
was style and Good Humor you made the White House, a place
that belongs to everybody On the new generation sets its sights
higher because it has you as a role model.
So you have made me proud and you have made the country proud.
My God, I'm literally tearing up right now because he was tearing
up. He took out a little tissue.
My gosh, she was really crying that.
Like you can see there's so much love there is in like it's
really sweet that he dedicated that much of his farewell speech
to her, I don't know and like you can see how much he
recognizes and appreciates the sacrifice that she made.
Like yeah. And that speech I can picture
him lying awake. And I am thinking and feeling
kind of guilty of like she's putting herself in this
position. And and she's like, you said,
like she really embraced it too and she did it with such Grace.
Yeah. He's a great speaker.
Yeah. Very long pauses.
Okay. I know you're very young. 51
point was over. It's so sad.
Love. They had an exit interview with
People magazine and I thought this part was cute.
Brock said he loved his mother-in-law.
Michelle's mom and said, she protects me from Michelle, so if
she's mad at me, her mom will go.
He's a nice boy, stop it after they left the White House, the
family traveled to Italy, Hawaii and Necker Island in the British
Virgin Islands. Apparently it's about owned by
billionaire, Sir, Richard Branson.
So they're enjoying themselves which yeah, I think they
deserve. Yeah, on life outside the White
House. Michelle told Oprah I love Oprah
02. I want to open my front door
without discussing it with anyone and I want to walk out
that door and just walk just want to walk by myself or
assemblance of feeling like I'm by myself.
I want to sit in the yard. That is not a national park.
I do not know. I do want to drop into Target.
I want Ooh, I do. I want to go to Target again?
Hmm. Oh I hope she can do things.
Yeah, maybe a hat. Yeah, yeah, sunglasses.
Yeah, kind of sunglasses. I would not be able to kind of
creepy a wig. Remember doing that though like
during the pandemic like I took a selfie myself out of mass
honest glasses. You have think anything of it?
Yeah. In the book.
Yes. We still can.
By Dan Pfeiffer. He wrote that Obama said to him,
here's the advice. I give everyone about marriage,
is she? Someone you find interesting?
You will spend more time with this person than anyone else for
the rest of your life. And there is nothing more
important than always wanting to hear what she has to say about
things. I'm not married but so true.
I think it sounds true really sounds like keep getting to know
each other. Yeah, no, they really.
They put in work. I feel like they both are Just
very dedicated people, you know? Yeah, and see, like they both
like really think about Like how to make marriage work, they're
both like thoughtfully. Considering, it know what like
neither has given up or anything, which I think.
I feel like when people give up and they just like don't care
anymore, that's when marriages fall apart, they very long term.
In 2018 Michelle's, no more becoming was published and in
the book, she talked about going to marriage counseling and then
she was on Jimmy Fallon and she joked that.
She was one of those wives. He said I'm taking you to
marriage counseling so you can be fixed Barack Obama because I
was like, Perfect. And then our counselor looked at
me, and I was like, what are you looking at?
And I guess she realized that it wasn't up to her husband, to
make her happy that she's putting too much on him.
I guess, you know, for her happiness, was this during their
presidency? I don't know.
I don't know when they did go, but that would be crazy.
You're the counselor and no president hard to keep the
secret. I know I'm very hard, you had to
be a very strong person. Yeah.
Also in 2018 Barack and Michelle founded their production company
called Higher Ground. Yes.
We were actually be murdered on a.
We're do we need to cut. Yes, we are featured on a
podcast that was created by there but that's crazy.
I wonder if I listen to it, can picture that.
Barack Obama does he like Twilight?
Did they sign off? Like did they?
Um, Their first film though. A documentary called American
Factory. Won the Academy Award.
Wow, that's cool. So they're all random.
I don't really know how they got into this though.
It doesn't seem very connected to the rest of their careers
doesn't feel like Megan and Harry.
You're trying to do the yes, track.
Totally coffee. Yeah.
In 2019. Barack and Michelle bought a
house in Martha's Vineyard. Love it.
A lot of Martha's Vineyard couples on this podcast.
Yeah. Yeah yeah, yeah.
September 20, 20 Michelle started her podcast if she still
does today. And she had Barack as her first
guest. And I wasn't that I was owed and
I thought they were really cool, really enjoyed it, that they're
really thoughtful and had some deep conversations, but they're
also very loving and teasing to each other.
And they talked about because it's came out, September, 20,
20, and they talked about spending time in quarantine
together and Brock's said, I've been loving it and joked that
she didn't seem happy about it. Yeah.
Didn't he have his birthday party around this time?
That was like, huge. I don't remember that.
Okay, I think I reminded us and all of not even part of my
notes, but I feel like I remember it was kind of during
the height of the pandemic. They had a big party and yeah, I
mean people people are upset at me today.
Yeah, but I wanted to like he's more of like not househusband
now but like he's like I'm putting my feet up but I'm
relaxing. I want to just play chess or
something. There's a I mean, what more can
you do for the world? Now exactly.
I kind of like how they've really take a step back to like
they will like campaign for people.
But they're like yeah we're not really like getting involved
anymore. I'm a certain point.
You really do need to just relax.
Yeah it's good for your health. Hmm.
Yeah I mean when I don't think so.
So hard. The presidency is, I always
think of that picture of Obama, like not even like yes, he was
getting older but like how quickly he went gray and that
just shows like the physical toll, that job that stressful
has on somebody. Seriously.
I'm at mean, imagine a country blaming you for everything, a
whole country, going downhill, or whatever.
It's a lot. Yeah, every time there's like,
some major Phrases. Yeah.
Go give a speech. Yeah.
Like oh my gosh, I wonder if that's frightening.
I wonder if you think that stage fright before doing that,
probably I'm like I'm sure there's sometimes you have to
give a speech where you have like a tummy ache that day or
something. I like you don't even mean like
just have to push through it. Yeah.
So on the podcast this is just random stuff about their
relationship that I took note on.
She mentioned that she would have more dogs.
I think she's too if it weren't for Brock oh Oh interesting.
Because one anymore. Yeah, I mean to is a good idea
to Ryan. They talked about how he was a
top of his class in law school and he joked.
That's why I started dating me because you thought I'd be your
meal ticket. Michelle talked about how back
in the day. She was more motivated by money
than Barack, because she wanted to be a rich lawyer.
And she even joined a wine club, but then she realized it wasn't
fulfilling and she said that working on the 47th floor below.
Firm was lonely and Fleeting. That's what you got into more
like Community. Yeah, we talked a lot about
Community actually reminds me my friend Madison.
She's very into community, and we talked about that lot, but
it's kind of related to their marriage, but I just thought it
was something to think about. He said, I think culturally
we've become much more focused on stuff and less focused on
relationships family, part of being an adult, and citizen is
to give stuff up. And she said that She feels like
people should stop striving to have it all because it's not
realistic and ultimately isolating.
And she said that's the opposite of what I was taught.
You were never supposed to have it all.
If you had it all that meant, you were being greedy because
you're taking me away from someone else and they were just
encouraging people to be more selfless and to be there for
your friends and family, which I actually do believe in
something. I have this thought this is like
a tangent, but I just feel like we could make the world such a
better place, if everybody. They took care of each other,
that's so true and I feel like she's also saying like it's not
about what are they singing that song?
Like, soak up the side? It's not about, it's not getting
what you want. It's loving what you've got.
What is it? It's not getting what you want.
It's loving, what you yeah. Did you just look that up?
No. Oh wow.
Oh my God. Yeah.
I do think that that's true.
We have a probably all too materialistic, but yeah, she
called him the eternal optimist at the end of the episode.
If I was funny, she thanked him for coming on the show.
He's like, we like talking. I wanna listen to the.
Yeah. And then he said, love you and
he said, love you cute and then, okay.
This is really the last thing I have, she was on NPR and she
talked about her advice for having a long marriage.
It's probably mentions, attend your thing.
We will see people I think and you've written about this.
They have idealized your marriage, they said there and
look at it. But you have always been very
clear-eyed and very honest. That marriage takes work.
It takes daily work. And that it is not always
glamorous and you have had some very unique strains, but there's
also the strains that any of us who are in a relationship or
married phase. Whether it be whose career goes
first or who takes on the childcare labor is there.
One piece of advice that you would give for people who are
thinking about how you put in that work for a partnership
that's lasted. But yeah, it's not really one
piece. Advise, it's to me, it's a
philosophy. It's an Outlook, you know, in
this age of we want everything. Now, we want everything quick.
We you know when life is everything but that we have to
understand that marriage is never 50/50 and, you know, you
sort of wonder how that idea kind of got out there.
I have found that if you stick with it, you know over the
course of your entire relationship, you may have.
50/50 over time, but if I look over my marriage, if I were to
judge it in year 5 or year 10, there was never 50/50.
Somebody was always giving way more someone always needed a
different kind of thing, you have to evolve with it.
And so yeah, there were times when I felt like I was 70% in
and he was doing 30 percent because of the choices that I
made in the terms of how I wanted our family to look.
I had to To take my foot off of my career gas pedal, never
putting on the brake, but slowing up a little bit.
Those are the natural compromises that are required.
And I feel bad when I see young people giving up on their
relationships, because there's their periods of hard, their
periods of discomfort. So I think it's important for us
to be honest in those conversations.
Not to glamorize what a partnership feels like because
then young people, quit too soon.
Soon, they quit before they've really, you know, played out the
full scenario. That's her classic never 50 50.
Yeah. It's confusing about that
though. Is at what point are you staying
too long in a situation that you shouldn't be in because you're
you see the big picture and you see potential or you see like oh
you know, I eventually this will change but what if it doesn't
and what if you are wasting your time with somebody I don't know.
I mean, I wish you would elaborate it.
Elaborate on it a little bit more.
I don't know if she means that like there's years where she's
doing 30% of words more like because if they today 10 years
of like, that's a lot. Yes, I am.
Yeah, it's tough. Cause like, I'm not married.
So I feel like, I don't know, but I feel like this is gonna
sound weird but my friend Madison, as I mentioned earlier
is really into community. She was talking a lot about it
and I kind of had a thought that it didn't sound too different
from business and then I also because you're talking about
like getting through conflict and making decisions.
And how do you do that with a group of people?
And I was thinking about doesn't sound that different from a
business and that will not sound very romantic.
But I was then even thinking it's kind of like a marriage and
like all of these things, whether it's an intentional
Community, or a business, or a marriage there about commitment,
it's like We're going to whether it's a group of people or, you
know, marriage is. I think it is romantic but I do
think it is a commitment to an ideal or to strive towards
something. I think you have to both want
the same life. Yeah.
And whether that's like having kids and grandkids someday and
like you know having them come to your house or whatever.
We're going to see. I don't know what it is but like
you, I think, dude get through that because you Are getting
through all of this for the life that you want.
And so you have to strip both want it.
I think it's the thing. Yeah, I think so.
And I think not everybody gets married necessarily wanting
that, like, I think some people don't get married fully ready to
commit to somebody for the rest of their life.
But when you are getting married, it's because it should
be because you value wanting to have a lifelong partnership,
which might not always look super romantic.
Yeah, idyllic. And it's going to, you have to
know, Going into it, that it's going to be hard.
But I think people, I think what she's saying, is young people
who want a partnership, they think it looks different.
Yeah, than it actually does. But if people don't like, I
think there's also a value like some people don't want to stick
it out like it too. That's not important to have a
lifelong partner. They would rather maybe have a
few good years with somebody and then have a few good years with
somebody else. Yeah.
Having like the beginning stage? Mmm.
Yes. It means different things to
different people. I wonder why.
I don't really know like she's said it many times, but I
sometimes don't know what to even means by the like I'm
giving seventies giving 30 or whatever like yeah, what does
that mean? Yeah, like giving it in at home
or yeah. Yeah.
Or is it just that you guys are making more decisions about one
of them versus the other? Probably maybe, you know and I
wonder like, okay now that he's not the president is there is a
50/50 or like, I don't know. Yeah it's a little puzzling.
Ceiling, but it's kind of her thing that, you know, I got some
moves like, even in life like if you're not the president or
whatever like yeah transfer. Like someone has a just a lot
more problems going on. So like the focal point and like
the thing that you're talking about the most or something true
true. Yeah, I don't know, I hope that
she feels like it's 50/50 or it's more on her side because it
sounds like she always kind of, says, like, she's giving more
than I know. When is he, when is he giving
you But they do seem to love each other a lot.
And I think that they are just especially her.
I think she's very honest and it's almost like one of her
causes I think is she wants people to know that they can
make it work. And I feel like she just is
putting all this out there, that sounds kind of negative but I
think she's doing it because she thinks it will help people.
So I feel like they do have a good marriage and so together
today, And if I had to guess, I really think they will stay
together. I'm gonna say, like, 90%, you
two stay together. I think they're a game.
Yeah, I do. If I couldn't picture them.
Same. I also think when it comes to
public figures like this, it's kind of hard for them to get
divorced. Oh I know that would be crazy.
There had to have been presidents who have gotten
divorced after probably maybe not divorced after Being a
president. After feel like FDR and Eleanor
Roosevelt were kind of separated, but they still were
married. I'm reading it.
Ronald Reagan was the only president who ever divorced his
wife. He divorced Nancy Reagan.
No but he left that first marriage.
So, early in life moved on to such a stable and functional
second marriage that the voters didn't care.
Okay. Stuff before it wasn't Trump
divorced twice. Yeah.
What this means. Yeah, yeah, it's 1 2010.
Oh yeah, has divorced twice? Yeah, I don't think correct me
if I'm wrong people but I don't think anyone's gonna divorce
after being in the doesn't seem like it like a president and the
first lady mmm-hmm We'll be the first probably true.
I had to guess all that's quite old now.
Yeah, I know. One point you're like this.
It's too old to do anything about it, but yeah, so that is
Barack and Michelle Obama. The Love Story.
It was really sweet and they did.
Make me want to watch a movie about them.
There is one, there is one. I think you'll be interesting.
If there's one more about their whole relationship, I think that
could be really good murder. Well, be yeah, probably
something. Yeah, definitely.
Yeah. I enjoyed learning more about
them. It was fun.
So, thank you guys for listening.
I know, I did include everything.
Too much but you know, you could have a whole podcast about them.
Yeah, well maybe we'll get them on the show.
What? Because they do podcast.
Yeah, we might as well as ass. Maybe that's her 50 or whatever.
That she's like, I want to do media.
Yeah. I like though that one of her
causes is educating people about the reality of barrage, which
makes me think she might I want to be a guest on the show.
So do you like that know how it seems from the outside?
This is what it's like on the inside.
Yeah. Michelle.
If you're listening. Hmm, collab.
That would be terrifying. Would literally like shit.
Myself is scariest, guess, I don't even her hairier than
Kathryn fight with Mama comes on to, oh my God.
Never promised seem like, he's like your old principal in a
way, like I feel like if I ran into Obama on Street, like, he
would get away. I am what you don't get.
That. Could know, you know, like,
there's just such a familiarity, you know, he probably went every
time he interacts with people, he probably always acts like
they know that I'm Brock Obama, you know what I mean?
Yeah. But not that he knows, you know?
No, I don't think I would because I feel like I know him.
So he knows me, that's a parents of the relation.
We've enjoyed, that is literally Oh my God.
If I have to hear that word, one more time, people like you said,
this to me off the mic. I feel like people are just
learned that word. Oh, yeah, they're applying it to
people for the dawn of time have, like, talked about people
that they didn't know and, like, made assumptions about them.
And yeah, that's like, we are literally social creatures.
Yeah. And people have done it since,
like ancient Rome. So probably before that.
Hmm. And especially It's like giving
you Joy. What is the problem with it?
Yeah, you know, everybody does it.
Yeah, I really feel like when people talk about that it's
because they feel smart. Hmm.
And that's what people are so selective about it.
Yeah. We like have parasocial
relationships with their favorite musician, or something,
or whatever. And then like for like a random
person, they wanted to just put other people down and say like,
yeah, I'll never understand these parasocial relationships
and then they'll probably talk about.
Yeah like a politician or something.
Yeah. 45 It's an act like they know them.
You don't care about that on this show.
No. You know what I do?
Have parasocial relationships. I'm proud.
Yeah, I'm creepy. And I'm proud as long as you're
not showing up at their doorstep and then like a ton of messages
who cares. Yeah, you know, it's it doesn't
dictate your life. Hmm.
It's you and your cousin talking about.
Well, thank you guys so much for listening.
Speaking of people that you have a pair of social relationship
with, who can you give us a hint about who the next episode is
on? Are you giving away that?
I have a very special relationship with this price is
a little bit, that's kind of a hint in itself.
Yeah. And next week is about My
favorite musical artists and I'm obsessed.
Um, I've definitely mentioned this artist on the show before
and it's about a relationship that I think was very
influential on the music as music episode mmm-hmm.
Well, thank you guys again. And thank you for listening.
We'll get back together next week and like I said, if there's
any Doctors was sitting and you have any advice.
Let me know. That'd be cool for doctors.
Listen, I have. Yeah, do it.
I doubt it politicians was okay. Bye.