Are you long time tonight? Do you miss me tonight?
Are you? Sorry we drifted apart?
Does your men? And we're back.
Hi, guys. Welcome to significant lovers.
We are your hosts. My name is Mel.
I'm Kel. And we are two cousins.
Two cousins. And this is our 54th episode of
Significant Lovers. It's flying by.
It's fall finally October. Halloween, she says.
Fall is our season for significant lovers.
It's the brand. It's our brand.
It's our thing for us. It's fall all year long.
Yep, but now it's. Super Fall Melo actually went
all out for fall. She has, so far, pumpkins she
bought pumpkin bars, pumpkin bread, Maple fudge.
Uh, huh. What else did you get?
A Candles pumpkin we have. I think they're apple cinnamon.
We have cider, donut and spider inspired cider right now.
It's so comforting. It fall.
I think it's a great time of year to fall in love too.
Well, it's cuffing season. It is.
I never heard of that until like two years ago.
Yeah, I mean, it totally makes sense.
I mean, even just the other day I was walking at night and I was
like, I really want to cuddle right now.
I feel like, honestly, summer. Summer can make you like, I
don't know if I should say this. It can make you feel like always
say it. Start sea in a way, you know
what I mean? I think people are very
distracted in summer. Yes, I think that's a hard time.
We're. Busy hard time to start a
longterm romance because people go off on vacation and then you
never hear from them again. Yeah, exactly.
But once it starts, the sun starts setting earlier and it's
darker. You want to be cozied up inside
with somebody and it's colder. You're less motivated to mingle
sometimes, and it's easier. Like settle, Not settle.
But yeah, And you want to do things like go to the movies.
Exactly. It just feels more romantic too.
Exactly. And in the summer, you're like,
sweaty. You feel kind of gross
sometimes. After a date, you're like, don't
touch me, because I definitely smell right now.
No, that's true. Yeah, so Fall and When Harry Met
Sally, you know, that sort of thing.
That's our inspiration. You know what I just this is
nothing to do with the episode. I just rewatched Sleepless in
Seattle. Oh, I haven't rewatched it in
years. Yeah, I only saw that one time
with you and we were both a little under impressed.
We were. Compared to the other two in the
Big Three You Got Mail and When Harry Met Sally.
But I really did like it. Upon the rewatch, I should
rewatch it. Still my least favorite, but of
the three, yeah, I would say. Is there any fall in it?
Just wondering. I would say it's more Christmas.
OK, OK, great. Yeah.
Yeah, we should watch. I mean, yeah.
Rosie O'Donnell is in it. Really.
I really like her. Yeah, I like Rosie O'Donnell
too. She's.
So funny. So funny.
So charming. Oh my gosh.
I love her. In a league of their own.
Yeah. Well, today segue into today's
couple is a Halloween couple. That was my inspiration for
picking this episode. Now we don't have to do themes
with the couples, but kind of want to do.
And I was thinking, who can I do for Halloween, you know?
And I had a couple ideas, but some of them I felt like I
couldn't pull off and I asked my sisters for advice.
I was really searching. And Shannon, I think suggested
what about Neil Patrick Harris and his husband David Burka?
Reason being, they are super into Halloween.
I love that insanely into Halloween.
Every year their whole family dresses up all in matching, you
know, theme costumes. They're so into it and they
didn't have a Halloween related scandal a couple years ago, so.
Okay, But there is way more to them than that isn't.
They're not just about Halloween costumes, but it'll be fun.
But I love that they share in that passion.
I will say there's nothing I hate more than when you go to a
Halloween party or a costume party and some people do not
give it their all. Yeah.
And I'm sorry if you're one of those people listening, Let's
have fun. Yeah, you know, does somebody
have to give it their all or you at least want to see?
Dress up. Just dress up.
You don't dress up. That's my pet pee.
I know. I hate that for a themed party.
When people just go in their regular I knows don't come.
I don't like that. Either.
Yeah, because you know what? That puts the fear in other
people. What if I'm the only one You
know? What about people who do a
really lazy one like, oh, I'm wearing yesterday's outfit or?
Something like I don't really. I'm dressed as myself.
No, doesn't count. You didn't wear a costume.
Put it in a little effort. Like people.
People are so afraid. I know.
Like outside the box. Or to not to be seen.
I love that. I love that they are so into
themes. Throwing parties, dressing up,
coming up with games, getting everybody involved, like
thinking of every possible little thing, I think.
Those things really strengthen a relationship.
Yeah. When people are able to be,
like, weird together, Yeah, they definitely are weird together.
It's cute. I never had too much of an
investment in Neil Patrick Harris.
I hope that doesn't upset anybody.
I've never seen How I Met your mother.
I've seen a little bit of it in my friends.
Some of them are into it. I've seen him in a couple random
things too. Yeah, like Gone Girl.
Is that what he's gone, girl? For though, How I Met Your
Mother, Yeah, definitely How I Met Your Mother.
He also was a teenage star on the show Doogie Howser, but that
was kind of before our time. And I didn't know anything about
David Burka, but I was intrigued.
The Halloween costumes I think got me interested and.
They've been together a long time.
It was a long time and we haven't yet covered a gay couple
of two men, which I don't know how that happened.
We have had, we have had a couple with women but.
Yeah, yeah, there's the unfortunate reality.
We've said this on the podcast before.
Is there are not as many high profile gay couples, which is so
unfortunate, but I hope that that changes.
I know it is shocking. I mean there are some obviously,
but there's only a couple high profile ones.
And I mean I want to do this show for a long time.
So it's like, OK, we do Elton John, Freddie Mercury, It's
like, OK, who's left? Yeah, exactly.
And there are some others that I am interested in, but I think
they're kind of obscure, like the guys from 13 Reasons Why.
Yeah, And then there's a couple. I don't know what you guys
think. Like, my sister has recommended
some ideas to us, but they're not officially out.
They're kind of speculative. And yeah, I don't know.
I know. That is good to cover.
I know that will come up later in that episode actually,
because Neil's asked about that. But yeah, so it's it's been
missing from the couple's the Hall of Flames so far.
But I I also thought from the outside before I did any
research, I thought that Neil and David seemed almost perfect.
That's what I think. And I thought they seemed
boring. Yeah, yeah.
And maybe if you're listening to this, you might be thinking the
same thing. But then I started thinking,
because I just did my first started my research.
I found out that Neil had dated women before and then it was
making me think like, oh man, did he feel like he had to
pretend early in his career? Like, that's interesting.
We haven't really talked a lot about.
That especially because the characters that he's played,
correct me if I'm wrong. Again, I'm not as familiar with
How I Met Your Mother, but he's been like a notorious womanizer
in his roles, and so I could see, especially in the 2000s, it
being risky to be openly out. Because that may make his acting
less believable to some people. It's true.
A lot of people were concerned about that.
But yeah, Neil, Dr. Carris was one of the kind of one of the
first openly gay actors. They've been a couple others,
but they're one of the few longterm gay male couples too,
you know? Yeah, because they've been
together 19. Wow.
I mean, just by Hollywood standpoints.
Yeah. Standpoint stand.
Is that a word? Yeah.
Right. Just you say some standards.
Standards. OK, yeah, standpoints standpoint
is a word. Sometimes I say things I'm like,
that sounds funky. Yeah, that is rare.
Yeah, that's really sweet. So what 3 words would you use to
describe them? I came up with fun.
Love it. Eclectic.
Oh, and a capillary queen over here and passionate.
Oh, OK, All positive. Yeah, they're all positive.
Yeah, we usually end with negative.
Like Passionate. Romantic.
Toxic. Caring.
Silly. Obsessive.
Yeah. Jealous.
We always end with the bad. I like that.
It's all positive, Yeah, but it's not boring, I swear.
OK, but who is Neil Patrick Harris?
Love A. Three name person I know NPH.
We could also call him. We could also call him Neil.
I'm gonna switch off. Wait, I never thought about the
fact that his name is Neil. His name is Neil.
Neil, wait, that is a weird like Sarah Jessica Parker?
She's Sarah. I know.
We know. To us, he's just Neil Patrick
Harris. The reason he goes by Neil
Patrick Harris is when this happens all the time.
When he was entering this green Actors Guild, there was already
an actor named Neil Harris. So she's just middle name.
Yeah. Yeah.
So, Neil, he's known for Doogie Howser, How I Met Your Mother,
Gone Girl. He's recently in Series of
Unfortunate Events and many Broadway performances.
But before that, he was born June 15th, 1973 in Albuquerque,
NM, and he grew up in Ruidoso, NM with his parents Sheila and
Ronald and his older brother. His parents were lawyers who
also ran a restaurant. I was puzzled how they had time
for that. But then I thought maybe they
were lawyers first, then restaurant.
I don't know. Yeah, but lawyer is a
notoriously busy job and so is owning a restaurant.
So maybe they. Owned it, but like, they just
had, like, yeah, maybe they're in it and they hired other
people to do them daytoday stuff.
Maybe they didn't really do anything.
Yeah. I don't know.
Or maybe they had a law degree but they didn't.
Like, you can be a lawyer, but not a practicing lawyer.
You know, I didn't investigate it too much because it felt a
little bit irrelevant, relevant, but let us know.
So Neil acted as a child. He was really into plays from a
really young age. And then he got a role in the
movie Clara's Heart. And he actually earned a Golden
Globe nomination at only age 13 for that role.
Yes. And then he was signed to the
show Doogie Howser when he was only a teenager, when it was a
national success, a really big show from 1989 to 1993.
It's about a teenage Doctor Who's a genius and dad becomes a
doctor. He's a teen, but it's also kind
of like part Doctor show, part coming of age, which is weird.
Like, it's kind of like young Sheldon, not as annoying, but
doctor, you know, genius. Yeah, he was really cute,
though. I watched a couple clips and I
watched the theme song. He was adorable.
Yeah. He had a lot of success from an
early age. After Dukey Houser ended, he
would have been about 20 years old, and he wanted to avoid
being typecast as like, you know, a precocious, nerdy type.
So we sign out different roles. He was in my Antonia, He was in
Joan of Arc. He played a book editor in the
short lived TV show Star Craving Mad.
And then he was also in three Harold and Kumar movies.
He was in a lot of Broadway shows, including Proof, All My
Sons, Rent and Cabaret. He's a big theater guy.
He's a theater. I can see that before David, he
dated a couple of women. He dated the actress Christine
Taylor, apparently Robin Lively, Blake Lively's older sister.
Oh wow, I know she's. Married to Coach Bolton from
High School Musical? No way.
Zach's dad or Troy's dad? Oh my gosh.
Coach Bolton. Interesting.
And Christine Taylor, the other ex?
She's now married to? Ben Stiller.
Oh wow. And they, they think have an
interesting relationship were. They like going to get divorced,
but they decided against it. Interesting.
Maybe we should look into that. I know he also dated the pianist
Carla Bianco and I read OK. I almost didn't find this guys.
But then in my research I came across something about that He
had actually dated a man for a little while named Max von
Essen, A fellow Broadway star, and it seems like it might be
true. I came across it in a couple
places. I think it was like, really
under the radar, but I don't. Know, I'm sure he probably did
have like very formative relationships with men.
I mean, maybe he didn't, but probably secretly.
I'm sure there's a lot of people we've covered who's.
Prior relationships we know. Oh, absolutely nothing about,
yeah, 100%. I mean, some people, we don't
really know anything. So yeah, I'm sure there's tons
of people that we don't know about.
Neil is also besides acting very into magic, he's an amateur
magician. Why that's so cute.
Yeah, he's really into it. And he likes to collect art.
And he writes too. He has written young adult books
called The Magic Misfits about magic, of course.
Oh my God, he must be such a fun dad.
I think he is. He seems somewhat Type A to me.
He's very, very ambitious and hardworking.
Seems like he likes to be busy. And then our story starts kind
somewhere in the early 2000s when Neil was on Broadway in
Cabaret and at the same time David Burka was on Broadway in
Gypsy. OK, David Burka.
Who? Who is that?
Who is this guy? OK, when I was first starting my
research, I kept in my head mistaking him for Justin Bartha.
The guy from National Treasure plays Riley Pool does.
I don't know, guys, come on, right?
You know him? Justin Bartha.
Wait, is he the guy from? No, never mind.
He's in the hangover. He's the guy that.
I mean, he's hardly in it, but he's the friend that goes
missing. Oh, yes, yes, yes.
Yeah, they do look a little like they they really, it's just the
last name. Bertka and Bartha.
I don't know, I I literally was calling him Justin by accident
at first. That's so funny.
But it's not Justin Bartha. But do you ever sometimes call
people the wrong name? Simply because they seem like
they would be a different name. Yeah, like there's there's no
reason why I'm calling you this name, but you have the essence
of this name. David Bertka was born May 29th,
1975 in Dearborn, MI, near Detroit, but he grew up in
Canton, MI. He's the son of Deborah and
Daniel, and he's a Polish descent.
He studied acting formally. He went to University of
Michigan, and then he attended the William Espers Studios
Acting School in New York. In 2002, he had a brief role on
the show The West Wing, and then he made his Broadway debut in
Gypsy in 2003. And I read the before Neil, he
dated a guy named Lane Janger, an independent film actor, for
10 years. Oh wow.
And if this is true, that's kind of crazy because he got with
Neil very shortly after this relationship.
So he is in it for the long haul and he's in.
Yeah, he's a longterm dater. That's crazy.
I feel like. I mean, good for him.
It would be, honestly, traumatic.
To date someone for 10 years. I mean, people do it, people do
it all the time, but that's a lot.
That's a decade. That's a long time.
He's very like Vanessa Hudgens in that way.
Yes, goes for if this is true, but goes from decade long
relationship into almost two decades.
Yeah, let me double that. Wait, she really does like, say
double it, Like she was with Zach for five years.
So she's like, you know, I'm going to be with Austin Butler
for Ton. Yeah, hopefully she's with her
next guy, 2020 or more than 20. David.
Oh yeah. David seems really sweet, really
friendly, talkative, outgoing. He loves to host people and
bring people together. He loves hosting dinner parties.
He's really about the parties and he gets really over the top
with games and themes and name tags and stuff and.
Yeah, he seems he likes to be raunchy too.
I think him and Neil both like to be raunchy sometimes and they
have both said that what drew them to each other was that they
made each other laugh, so. Important Humor is so important.
They have fun. They have fun together.
So I feel like in any long term relationship you're going to go
through so many serious things. It's so important to be with
someone who can still make you laugh.
Yeah, it is really important. Sometimes after a fight, all he
needs to do is just make a joke. Yeah, exactly.
I mean, sometimes that might be a little annoying at first, but
then then it's a good time. So Neil talked about first
meeting David in Out magazine and this would have been around
2004. He wrote about it.
He said, well, they both wrote about it actually, this is
Neil's part, he said. I ran into my friend Kate one
day and she was with this brooding James Dean type guy in
a leather jacket who gave me the head nod and then turned away.
I assumed he was Kate's boyfriend and said nicely done.
And then she said, David, he's not playing on my team, but he
has a boyfriend. He's told the story many times
and like sometimes he tells it differently.
Like sometimes. Sometimes she goes, David, oh,
he's totally gay, so depends who he's talking to, I guess.
But I don't know what she really said, but it was something like
that. So then I just kept seeing him
on the periphery and in turn catching up on him.
But I didn't want to be that guy who was creating some sort of
romantic interference. So I was always around when he
was around, hoping the stars would align.
When we all hung out for the first time, I was invited by
Kate to an American Idol viewing party.
I just dammered around him. I couldn't take my eyes off him.
And then David said. I've always known I was going to
have a monogamous relationship, raise children and be happy in
love. It was the one thing in life
that I never doubted for a second.
I was in another relationship when I met Neil and I was doing
the long distance New York to LA thing.
It was sort of on the rocks. Long distance is so hard.
I was performing in the Sam Mendes version of Gypsy on
Broadway when I ran into Neil on the street.
He was doing the Mendes version of Cabaret at the time and I was
with a friend who knew him pretty well.
It wasn't a big Doogie Howser fan.
I'd probably seen it once or twice when I was growing up, so
I gave him a Hey, what's up? Nice to meet you.
And that was really it. I thought it would be nice to
know him, but I didn't think in a million years I started dating
him. This is a lot of raining, OK
then, David continues. We've been hanging out with
other people and we had a lunch or so, but nothing romantic.
I thought he was adorable, though, these amazing blue eyes
that are just so hypnotizing to me.
I ended up breaking up with my boyfriend and a week later Neil
and I had a date. We went to see a movie.
I think it was taking lives with Angelina Jolie, last week's
episode. I know.
We started hanging out every single night, and after three
months it was just nonstop. We talk on the phone at least
eight times a day and text at least 25 times a day.
We are, in a way, very codependent.
He's my lifeline in an amazing way.
Without him, I can't breathe. The biggest thing is that he
makes me laugh. He's also smart.
He can do everything. I'm not kidding.
He think he's half robot. He makes me a little more
grounded and I bring out the wild side in him.
Don't get me wrong, we fight our fights last five minutes and
then we're over it and we're both Gemini.
We have a good twin and a bad twin, and the four of us get
along really well. Oh, I know, that's cute.
And then sorry, I have a lot more.
This isn't even the whole interview.
I just, I thought it was all really interesting how much they
were sharing. Then Neil, NPH said.
There's something kinetic about him and his being.
He's classically sexy, yet he's very much a boy and his energy.
It's a great dynamic. When I see people who are
equally attractive, they tend to seem a little more quiet and
kind of Marlo, Marlboro, Manny and Dave is into thesis of that.
He's more like Tigger. I'm in turn very introspective,
the thinker rather than the doer.
I tend to weigh the options before making decisions and
David is a polar opposite of that.
We're hyper similar and also incredibly opposite.
We share a wardrobe. We have the same shoe size, body
size, height and weight. We're both Gemini.
We both like the idea of family, not a nuclear family, but a
social family. Yet we're incredibly opposite in
the way we process information. Wait, like Tigger, I think.
Wait, what? I think he just means that he's
energetic. Oh, yeah.
Yeah. OK.
OK, fun and jumps around. OK, that's cute.
What did you think it meant? I don't know, because I thought
for some reason I was getting caught up on like the sexy part.
I think that was actually before sexy, like Tigger.
I don't remember Tigger being sexy.
I mean, who would you say the sexiest one on that Winnie the
Pooh? No, Probably the Tigger.
Winnie the Pooh. Yeah.
Who is it? It's not your Maybe rabbit.
Is that his name? I remember what Rabbit looks
like. Winnie is really sweet, but
yeah, not no. I would not have sex with
Lennie. Yeah.
I mean, I think Tigger might be as sexy.
Tigger probably is. He's probably, like, really?
Yeah, energetic. And that that might not be as
fun, but. Or it might that might be like
too much. But it depends if you're on his
wavelength or not. Not Piglet.
Piglet, I feel like is not legal.
Know not even your piglet. You were would be the worst.
Yeah. Yeah.
Are you forgetting? Well, there's the kangaroo,
Kanga Kinga. I don't remember what Kinga's
like. She's a mom.
I mean, not that there's anything wrong with moms.
Obviously she's done it. She's just so sweet.
Yeah, she's so pure. Yeah, Tigger probably is the
sexiest one, but I'm not sexually attracted to any of
them. No.
Yeah, we can move on. We all went on to say that he
kind of thought that he was going to be alone the rest of
his life, that he never really had a true love by the time he
was in his mid 20s. And interestingly, David
apparently never felt that way. He was pretty confident he was
going to interesting find someone and have kids.
Yeah, I've heard this story about how they met a couple of
times, and Neil always kind of says that he was slightly
stalking David. Like, you know, not in a creepy
Joe Goldberg way, but. The way everybody does, Yeah.
That he was, like purposely trying to be in the same places
as David. And you know, if he heard that
he was going to be at this party, then he would definitely
go and he was really into him. But yeah, eventually David and
his boyfriend of 10 years broke up.
Neil was around and they started dating.
As they said David still had stuff back in LA.
So I guess they went over there, got his stuff and then drove
across the country back to New York and they got an apartment
together in Harlem. Wow, very fast.
I feel like this was only maybe a couple months in and Neil said
about this, I initially fell for David harder than he fell for
me. I was in love with him before he
was comfortable saying it, and I think that speaks to our past
experiences. I remember saying I think I love
you and he was like, that's really nice, which is not
necessarily what you want to hear.
But I appreciated his honesty and not jumping the gun and
saying something because he felt obligated to.
And it's cool because, I mean, yeah, maybe David didn't feel
ready in the moment to say it, but clearly he separates his
feelings if he says Neil is his lifeline.
And yeah. Can't live without him.
So, you know, it's like, yeah, you might think that's a red
flag, but they kept dating. And also good for Neil for not
panicking. Yeah.
Oh, my God. He didn't say it back.
Yeah, I have to end this. Yeah.
You know, that's really secure of him.
Like, I appreciate that he didn't jump the gun.
I feel like most people would not keep dating.
Yeah, I could see a lot of people, but I don't know what I
would do. That is such a thing though,
that where people I have one friend and obviously not going
to name names, but she was nervous for a while that her
boyfriend would say I love you and she's like, I don't know if
I'm ready yet. I hope that's not obvious.
Her boyfriend would not be listening.
Might like now they say it, but she was.
I mean, it's such a big moment in a relationship.
And if you're not ready to say it, you don't want to feel
pressured to say it back. You want it to be the right time
for sure. So that was that was all around
2004. And then in 2005, Neil got the
role of Barney Stinson on CBS show How I Met Your Mother and
they moved to Los Angeles. But I was thinking, Oh my God,
they just moved to New York. Crazy.
Yeah. Sometimes life is like that
though. Big.
I mean, that's a big break. Yeah, big.
It was very big, NPH said. I assumed the show would be a
short chapter. The plan was always to come back
to New York when the show ended and raise our family.
But the sitcom ran for nine seasons and nearly ten years, so
they were out there for 10 years.
Very successful show. Yeah, it was.
It was huge. David actually appeared in seven
episodes of How I Met My Mother as a scooter.
And at this time, David and Neil's careers were in very
different places. When they first met, they were
kind of the same. I mean, Neil had been a child
star, but now he was mostly just working on Broadway.
David was on Broadway. You know, they were basically in
the same exact place. But now Neil is thriving on this
show. He's one of the main.
He's like an A list celebrity. Yeah.
And then David was actually struggling in LA because I think
he's more of a theater actor and he wasn't really getting roles.
Yeah, that's hard, I know. And he's spoken.
I mean, it's going to come up more later, but he's spoken
pretty openly about this, how he would get jealous of Neil.
Yeah, and it would be hard. For him.
And it would be resentful, probably a little bit at times
because it's like, well, I'm living in LA, which is holding
me back. But yeah, because of you and
your job. Yeah.
And then Neil will sometimes come to him all excited about
some news and opportunity he got.
And then David's happy for him, but then it makes him feel bad.
So that kind of started. Wait, so were they?
Was Neil Patrick Harris at this point at the beginning of the
show, openly out or no? OK, no.
So there's still a secret right now.
But do people like, I'm guessing like the cast mates and stuff?
No, Right. Yeah, I'm pretty sure they did,
yeah. Especially by the time David was
on the show, it was only 7 episodes, but that's an OK
amount for. A guest?
Yeah, I wonder if celebrities were better at keeping secrets
like that back then. Without maybe social media,
Probably. But it was after David Bricker
was on How I Met Your Mother, six months after apparently
allegations started rising that he had only gotten the part
because of a romantic relationship with Neil, and
speculation around the story eventually led to Neil
acknowledging that he was gay in a cover story A.
Guest star Like who cares why he got the part in the 1st place?
So a lot of the speculation was actually led by Perez Hilton.
I knew you were going to say that.
I knew you were going to. How did you know?
Because he outed like everybody. By now he was such a tyrant.
I know who himself is gay. Yes.
And Perez was posting a lot about Neil at the time.
And Neil actually said about this.
Yeah. There was an interview in 2006
that claimed that I was asked if I was gay and that my publicist
had said that I was not of that persuasion.
That was the weird catalyst tipping point, because that
expression set Perez Hilton off. He was offended by that and
started posting about me and asking people to come forward
with truths or stories. Then it became apparent that I
needed to make some sort of decisive, respectable move.
So then he's kind of forced to. I mean, he didn't have to, but.
Yeah, Perez was basically asking like, if anyone has any
information about Neil Patrick Harris, give it to me, I wonder.
Why Prez Hilton was doing all that as a gay person himself.
Like, maybe it's comes from a place of like wanting to see
your sexuality, like, more mainstream and represented in
Hollywood, but it's like he was acting like he was getting
people in trouble. So weird.
Well, that's what Neil said. Like he he thinks that Perez
does. He didn't like the phrase.
Neil's not of that persuasion. Yes.
And he probably felt like this. Neil Patrick Harris, guys living
a lie, you know, Like, I know, you know, maybe it insults him
in a way. Yeah, I don't think it's right.
But he thought it was insulting that these famous people were
pretending to be straight. Yeah, yeah.
And he just wanted it out there, but obviously not his place.
But in the early 2000s, people, I don't think people would have
even questioned president this, you know?
Maybe some people, maybe some people, but it's like it was
common to just 2000 people, really homophobic it was.
But yeah, he he came out in People magazine and it was a
huge cover story, he said. I'm happy to dispel any rumors
or misconceptions, and I'm quite proud to say that I'm very
content gay man, living my life to the fullest and feeling most
fortunate to be working with wonderful people in the business
I love. Wow, honestly, people who came
out in the 2000s or the 90s, it's really paved the way for so
many people now. I think they do not get enough
credit because like I said, it was still very homophobic back
then, the culture and it was such a different environment.
Now I feel like people can come out like left and right and it's
still like. It's still hard, hard, but it's
it was such a bigger deal back then.
Like, it would be talked about on, you know, late night TV,
your talk shows and stuff, and it would be the fact that it
would be on the cover of a magazine.
And it was so brave and it normalized it for so many people
like, oh, I watch that guy on TV all the time, Like like Ellen.
That's why I'm never going to really hate Ellen, because I
think it really normalized it for so many people.
I mean, we only have one history.
Like, we don't know what would have happened without them.
Exactly. You know, they paved the way,
they really did. And there was a lot of fear that
this would ruin his career. I mean, people were writing
about this a lot like, oh, is this going to ruin you?
Patrick Harris's career? But actually kind of the
opposite happened. I think people were surprised or
they were impressed to realize, like you said earlier, that he
was so good at playing a ladies man.
Yeah, even though that it was like shocking that this guy, and
I know that seems homophobic and it is, but that was actually a
really important thing that happened, that people could put
that together in their head. Like, wait, someone actually can
be a great actor and play whoever they need to play.
They can play a straight person and be gay and like it doesn't
matter. Yeah, exactly, You know.
Yeah, there's a big deal. Yeah, it's like like being gay
wouldn't typecast you to just be like a gay character.
And I feel like back then, gay characters, unfortunately, were
like, usually really offensive or stereotypical.
Yeah, yeah. Never the main character,
unfortunately. Yeah, so he he would continue to
get starring roles even though all the articles were guessing
that he wouldn't. Sometimes the media is weird
that way. I know, yeah.
Expect. The worst, Yeah, I feel like
they really did that with Miley. They always expected her to like
have a full on downward spiral and it never totally happened.
I know. So in 2007, David proposed and
Neil wrote about this, he said. David first proposed to me five
years ago, so this is in the future when he wrote it,
obviously, but on an actual street corner where we met I.
Know that's so cute. They're so cute that way.
We were on our way to an event at an Indian casino 45 minutes
out of town in a limousine, and David wanted to stop for some
reason. I didn't quite get it.
I thought he wanted to get booze or something, and then he was
out on one knee and proposed. And I was so freaked out by
that. I said yes, but I didn't know
what it meant. Then I got the ring and loved
it. And a year later, on Valentine's
Day, I proposed to him in Santa Monica.
That was four years ago. The callus on my right hand is
long formed and not from masturbation.
I'm dying to move over, dying to move over to the other hand.
I'd also like to call him my husband.
I'm not the biggest fan of the word partner.
It either means that we ran a business together or we're
Cowboys. Boyfriend seems bleeding like
maybe we met two weeks ago. I've been saying better half for
as long as I've been able to. I think that's a little self
deprecating and clearly defines that we're in a relationship,
but it would be nice to say my husband.
I totally get what he means by that.
Yeah. See, I I know, like, I feel like
it's more common to use partner now because it's it's a gender
neutral. Yes.
But like, I feel like back in the day, the word partner had.
The implication that like people said partner because they didn't
want people to know that it was a same sex relationship, it was
kind of hiding who you're. Yeah, exactly.
Because it could mean business partner.
Yeah, I mean creative partner. Yeah, for creative partners, I
know that. I understand it's it's good to
have a gender neutral term and we do need one, but.
I wish there was another one. Yeah, because I'm a significant
other. I guess no.
But it's so long. I know it is long.
They should abbreviate it. The English language really
needs to come up with a new one because because like I work for
a company and I still hear the word partner all the time in the
business sense and it does get kind of confusing and it just
doesn't sound romantic to. It's not that romantic.
It is kind of a sounds really formal, I don't.
Know. Yeah, it sounds like like very
sanitized in a way. Yeah, I don't know.
I wish we just had another cute word.
I think significant other is really cute, but it is just.
Long and somewhere like Soulmate Dramatic.
Yeah, you can't say S so, but it's not that mainstream.
Yeah, and it's just abbreviated. Yeah, lover is like, you're not
going to say like to people at work.
Like, yeah, me and my lover went to the movies over the weekend.
Too much. Yeah, because that makes you
think of. There does need to be an
alternative gender neutral term for a significant other.
That's cute. Yeah, yeah.
I was actually Googling this because because they say this
all the time. This has come up in so many
articles. They always say they I think
also because, all right, this was 2007, like it wasn't even
legal for them to get married and so it meant so much to them
to be able to say husband that was really important to them.
So they still say this all the time though.
It's like my husband I want to say husband.
I don't like seeing partners. So but I was Googling it what's
another term and actually came across some people asking the
same question on Internet cuz like they wanted to use a gender
neutral term but they didn't want to use partner and I don't
know some people say like just my person.
Oh yeah, person is cute. But I guess, like, it's also a
little Your person isn't necessarily romantic.
That's true. It could be your partner.
Yeah. I mean, your person could be
your mom, I guess. Spouse.
What do you think? It's those?
But you have to be married. Yeah, exactly.
Yeah. I mean I sometimes use the words
that was button. Yeah, there's no word for a non
married, gender neutral significant other.
That is cute and easy to say. Yeah, that's a shame.
But I think as a culture we could come up with one.
I feel like we're inventing words all the time.
Let's try to come up with one Not too corny or anything.
Like a slaying, Like I feel like we could, yeah, it could be
something that has evolved from another word.
Like, I feel like we could take something with significant
other, like a Siggy Siggy. I don't know.
I think that's cigarette actually.
Yeah, maybe chat. GB T could come up with some
options. Yeah, that's sweet.
I was also thinking of in terms of engagements.
I like that with queer couples. There's not as much expectations
on one. Person to propose.
I mean, a woman could propose to a man in a straight
relationship, but it doesn't often happen.
And I think there are, It is still very much stigmatized.
Yeah, because there's a stereotype that, like, men are
afraid of commitment. So.
I know it's cute that they both proposed too.
Yeah. So also one said No, the second
one, we're already engaged, aren't we?
Yeah, OK, this second proposal has a lot less pressure.
Yeah, Neil, what the heck. September 2007, they made their
very first appearance as a couple on the red carpet at the
Emmys, where Neil was nominated. Big deal.
Big deal back then. Yeah, 2008, Really.
Sadly, David's mother, Deborah, passed away.
And this really, this really sent David into a depression.
He, as I said, didn't feel fulfilled by his acting career
and he felt lost in LA and he was just so devastated about his
mom. But from this time he actually,
I don't think it started quite yet, but he decided to become a
chef. Wow.
I don't. I actually didn't know that.
I didn't know it either. I knew they had a cook, like he
had cookbooks, but I didn't know he was a cook.
Yeah. In 2008, he enrolled in the
Cordon Bleu in Los Angeles Culinary School.
So he was taking a new path. I think that's really great.
You know, he was like, you know what?
Acting is not making me happy right now.
I'm in a really hard place. I'm going to try something new
and try something that I like and so.
I love that at any age you can just totally reinvent
themselves. Yeah, you can.
Don't forget people. Also in 2008, of course.
Twilight came out, yes, but he was on Howard Stern.
When do we not have someone open up on Howard Stern?
Well, sometimes we don't, but a lot of times that's where we get
the good stuff from. Howard Stern and I couldn't
access the actual whole interview, but I read some
summaries and he talked about how he dated Christine Taylor
from 1997 to 1998. She is known for playing Marsha
Brady in the Brady Bunch movie and the Nickelodeon show.
Hey dude, and she he said about her.
She's the coolest, nicest chick ever.
She's an absolute catch. And I thought, if I'm not going
to feel the Super sparks with her, it probably means I'm gay.
Did he feel feelings for men otherwise?
I don't know if he said. That's interesting.
I know he talks a little more about this.
Later on 2009, Neil hosted both the Tonys and the Emmys.
He's a host. Yeah, that guy hosts.
It's a lot of pressure. We talked about this.
People are so hard in the hosts. I know there's so hard, it's
ridiculous. They can never be happy.
Yeah, I feel like usually I'm like, that was fine.
Yeah, I've never maybe once have watched a show on like that.
The hosting job was terrible. Who I don't remember.
Maybe once, but I actually OK people might like throw to me.
Was at me for saying this, but, and I don't know how I'd feel
now, but when I was younger, I loved this ethnic farmland one.
I couldn't believe people were so pissed about it.
I had a great time. I loved it.
I really did too this. Crazy people were so pressed
about it and I didn't even mind the James Franco and Hathaway
one. I don't know.
I thought it was interesting. Yeah, people like once a year.
Especially when it comes to the Oscars.
For some reason, they act like it's the most important job in
the whole world, like president or.
Something they act like, OK, they have to lead our nation for
four hours. They're all they do is like,
they make a little jokes and they help us transition from
presenter to presenter. It's not a huge deal and people
act like it makes or break the whole show.
I know. It's so stupid, yeah.
That will happen, but he's a 2A Willet.
I don't think it overall affected him too much.
Yeah, career wise, but yeah. So also around then, David
graduated from Le Cordon Bleu and began running a catering
company in LA And actually, and he still has been doing act,
some acting things, but I feel like that's perfect for him
because he loves hosting parties.
Yeah, that's so fun. I was thinking, oh, it's
interesting, he didn't open a restaurant.
Then I thought, wait, he loves hosting parties, like probably
catering. It's a different occasion every
time. Yeah, you can really customize
it. Maybe he gets involved in the
decoration, I don't know. But you know, I think he loves
hosting parties and. That's so fun.
Sounds perfect for him. In 2010, October 2010, David and
Neil welcomed 2 fraternal twins born by a surrogate.
The twins are Gideon and Harper. A boy and girl were born into
2010. So I feel like it kind of seemed
like came out of nowhere. But sometimes that happens with
surrogate Yeah. So it's two embryos.
And interestingly, it's one of them is David's and one of them
is Neil's. I didn't know that.
Yeah. Wait, that is so cool.
I know. And they have the same
surrogate. Yeah.
Was the surrogate who delivered them the biological model?
I don't think she was. I think it's just I don't.
I think that makes it easier. Probably, Yeah.
Wow. And yeah, Gideon was named after
Gideon Rubin, an artist they both really liked.
And Harper is named after Harper Lee, author of To Kill A
Mockingbird. And it's interesting because
they decided they didn't want to know which one was each of
their. But you can.
Figure it out. I think now you can really tell
too. You can tell which one is Neil's
and which ones, David, just by the eyes.
But that must have been interesting.
Like piercing it together. Yeah.
Like, I wonder how soon they were like, Oh yeah, that's.
I know. Yeah, they're so cute.
They're adorable. Oh my God, that is so cool.
Now obviously at this point they can't talk yet, but when they
can, they call Neil Papa and David Dad.
Just cute, Papa. That's so cute.
Yeah, I saw some cooking video with David and the kids and they
were like, you mentioned, like Papa this, blah, blah.
And then he was like, who's Papa?
He said Neil Patrick, that's so cute.
But they're still engaged here. They're still planning it to get
married, but they're not yet. I think they wanted it to be,
you know, recognized by the state.
And then June 2011, New York Senate passed the marriage
equality bill and Neil and David publicly announced their
engagement for the first time. So I guess we wouldn't have
known they were engaged until now, but five years after the
fact. Wow.
And, Neil tweeted. David and I did propose to each
other, but over five years ago, we've been wearing engagement
rings for ages, waiting for an available date.
Oh my gosh. It is so crazy how long it took.
His crazy was only 2011. I know.
Yeah, I remember. I was in college when it
happened nationally. It's crazy.
It was just codified, like only last year or something.
Yeah, Crazy October 2011. Okay.
This is that fateful Halloween party that has gotten Neil and
David in a lot of trouble. You know what?
I've never heard about it. OK, cool.
So. Not that much trouble, I was
saying to mom. Like, I'm worried people are
going to be mad at us for even covering them because of this.
Because people were really mad about this.
This is my first time hearing about it.
Maybe you'll I feel like you're really on top of this stuff.
I'm surprised. Maybe as I keep talking, you'll
remember. I don't know.
OK. But I will say though, I went
because the way we researched these a lot of the times is I go
through the news through every single month.
Me too through all the years. So you see all the news articles
or at least the top ones, but you can go through the pages if
you need to, you know, So I see everything.
And when this happened, there was no news about it.
Absolutely nobody wrote about it.
People got mad. After the fact in 2022.
Oh my. You know what?
That's on you guys. We're not getting mad back then.
I hate that. And I know.
I mean, it is bad, but, well, I don't know what I know.
I have to tell you. I have to tell you.
Before you go off, there's a lot to discuss.
There's a lot to. Discuss.
I'm like, getting mad. I have no idea.
You don't even know what you're defending yet.
Yeah. But yeah, I just want to say
that back then that you do just have to keep in mind where they
were thinking at the time. Well, I hate when people get mad
10 years later because it's like if you weren't mad back then,
then that means whatever they did that was socially
acceptable, so they didn't know better.
I really think that anyone at that party, if they did have a
problem with it, no one said, I don't know, Yeah.
But anyway, the thing that happened was that Neil and David
had a Halloween party with a buffet, and at the party they
served a meat platter in the shape of Amy Winehouse's body
just three months after she had died.
Did you hear about that? No.
That you're getting, you're recognizing it.
A lot of people thought it was a cake, but it was actually a
meat. Platter it was there.
Pictures of this there are, and it's actually very disturbing.
It's made out of beef ribs, pulled pork and chicken sausage,
which is disgusting. And the way that it resurfaced
was because Jesse Tyler Ferguson, You know him?
Yes. Modern Family.
He was on Modern Family, the show.
And him and his now husband. I know.
Is it really? OK, that is really bad.
No, wait, but is that definitely Amy Winehouse?
Wait, wait, wait. Oh, hang on, hang on.
I'm not there yet. The reason this resurfaced is
because Jesse Tyler Ferguson and his now husband Justin Mikita.
Another Justin. See, I was getting confused.
They were guests at the party and Justin posted a picture of
it to his Twitter and Justin tweeted look who showed up last
night looking good. So obviously Justin thought it
was funny or no big. 10 years later.
He posted it. He posted it back then, back
then. So that's how in 2022 it came
out again, because somebody, some person went way back.
And Justin Nikita. I don't know how to say his last
name. I went back in Jesse Taylor
Ferguson's husband's Twitter and found it.
Wait, it is actually really bad. It says there's A tag next to it
that says the corpse of Amy Winehouse, and it looks like
it's like almost like a decomposing body.
Yeah, And the fact that it's meat.
Like, do people actually eat that meat?
I guess so. That is really disturbing.
I actually cannot defend that, I know, but OK, I do have.
I think it's wicked bad, but I do you think it doesn't look
anything like her? No, it looks like the Bride of
Frankenstein. So I was wondering if maybe it
doesn't make it right, but I feel like somebody, whether it
was Neil David, I don't know. After the fact was like what if
we made it Amy Winehouse and they put a cigarette in her
mouth and then wrote that next to her?
Because the face looks absolutely nothing like her.
Like it doesn't really looks like they drew on it.
The. Hair is like, really like.
You know how Amy Winehouse had that big hairstyle?
But it's short. It's like it's like Marge
Simpson hair. And the face is, I don't know it
just it's very disturbing. But also I don't know why it.
Does look like a decomposing body?
Yeah, it's disgusting, gross. It is really bad.
It's some people try to be edgy with stuff like that.
I know. I can't really defend that.
That's really insensitive. It is.
I know. I was wondering what were they
thinking? Like, really?
What were they thinking? Yeah, I don't know.
I didn't realize she died that long ago.
That's crazy. I know.
I was trying to. Imagine how this happened, and
imagine being one of. I mean, people love Amy
Winehouse. They can imagine being one of
her loved ones. I know.
That's awful. I know they didn't.
People did not respect her back then, though.
They didn't. That's the thing.
They really did. I mean, I remember even after
Whitney Houston died, like, my history teacher made a ton of
jokes about it, like that month. It's really bad.
So yeah, this resurfaced in 2022 and Neil addressed it and he
said, I think the Entertainment Weekly.
He said a photo recently resurfaced from a Halloween
theme party that my husband and I hosted 11 years ago.
Who's regrettable then and it remains regrettable now.
Amy Winehouse was a once in a generation talent and I'm sorry
for any hurt this image caused. OK, I bet he is embarrassed.
I know. I bet they do feel bad.
Yeah, it is really bad, very much important taste.
But I was reading a lot about this and what people thought and
reading comments and stuff, and I thought some people were
getting a little carried away. Like I saw some people even
saying like there is something sinister about gay men or.
Whatever. And I know I hate when people
like, fuck up and then other people use it as an excuse to
indulge in their bigotry that they already have.
I know this is on like so long, so I feel like these people
thought they were like progressive or something.
But yeah, yeah, like that happened recent.
Oh, like with Lizzo. Like people, you know, like
she's getting cancelled. And then the vitriol that is
being thrown her way is because people wanted a reason to hate
her in the 1st place. Because she's a bigger woman.
Yeah, and so they're like gleeful that they can like shit
on her. And I I feel like that's
probably the same way with something like this.
I think the the everyone calls it a cake, but it wasn't a cake.
But I call it a cake I. Would be better if it was a
cake. It would be a lot better.
I don't know. It's more creepy.
That's meat. Yeah, I think it's terrible.
But I do think some people seemed really gleeful about it
too. Like, yeah, way too excited
about. Trashing him.
I do hate when people are excited.
Yeah, to be like, we got you. We found the thing that's wrong
with you. And this is what it is like,
Yeah. And I mean, it's really, really
bad. I know.
There's really no way for me to defend that.
But society was also really awful back then.
It was. And people should have gotten
mad about it back then, but I guess.
The guy who posted it wasn't that famous, so maybe it just
slipped under the radar. I know, I know.
He obviously was OK with it that like that.
Does make me like my stomach true?
I know. I also wonder whose idea it was.
But do you think with Halloween some people do get carried away,
people get very carried? Away and they try to push the
envelope and they try to be edgy.
Yeah, I think with Halloween, some people do try to be like,
as scary and creepy as possible. And they miss the mark with
that. I know, Yeah, totally.
But I was wondering, OK, who's I?
Was it Neil's idea? What if it was David's?
Idea. I feel like that could really be
a huge fight between a couple. Like, why did you do that?
But I feel like Neil has to go down either way.
Oh yeah, Because even if it was David's idea, like, the only
reason they are getting in trouble is because of how famous
Neil is. Yeah.
So it's kind of his responsibility to go.
Down for this? Yep, I agree.
I mean, I doubt it was just one person's idea, but honestly, I
didn't hear about it. Maybe I just.
I think they got away with it because this is the first time
I'm hearing about it. Yeah, I don't know.
I'm not sure how many people have heard about it, but it's
kind of like, so recently Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher have
been in a lot of hot water. Yes, and we don't have to get
into that. But it just reminded me of how
you were saying to me the other day off the mic.
You were saying if you're going to get cancelled, it's kind of
best case scenario to get cancelled with your spouse.
Exactly like. Yeah, we're not getting into
like what they did pretty bad, but at least they're going down
together they can. I bet that's bonding.
And I feel like if one of them was cancelled, the other one
might feel pressure to leave, to leave them or denounce them, or
they might be mad at them. Yes, I bet it makes them closer.
Unless one of them is like you told me to write the letter,
that's true. That's possible.
That's what I was wondering. But they do seem United don't
matter was your idea, Yeah. I feel like getting cancelled
would be a huge stress on a relationship.
Definitely it is. Nice that they both are in it
together and it would be hard to find somebody else right now.
So yeah, I know it was really bad guys.
I don't know what to say. Yeah, but we've covered People
did much worse on this show. Yeah, we actually have.
So I I kind of tend to agree with you though, that it really
doesn't look like Amy Winehouse, that I almost feel like someone
at the party or something could have even been like, oh, what if
we made this, like, really distasteful joke?
Yeah, or maybe like the Day of. The party, like maybe before it
started. And like because it doesn't look
they didn't do a good. Job making it like anyone
doesn't look like anything like her.
It's just I feel like maybe they're trying to be edgy, but
it really is distasteful and insensitive.
I'm just shaking my head, but that doesn't translate to.
Yeah, audio. I'm just ashamed.
Disappointed. Yeah, disappointed.
But the show must go on that same year.
Back to happy? No.
But this is when they started their tradition of dressing up
the whole family and they do this every single year ever
since then. And the this is when the kids
are only one and they always do a theme and the whole family
does it. So this year the theme was Peter
Pan. Oh.
Cute David Burka was Peter Neil Patrick Harris Captain Hook.
How do you know? I'm just guessing.
I bet one was Tinkerbell. Yes, Harper was Tinkerbell and
Gideon was John. I think that's the worst one.
Probably to be, yeah. Like if I saw someone dressed up
as John by themselves. Yeah, yeah, I mean, yeah,
together it makes sense. But alone he would just have
glasses and a nightgown. Yeah.
And random. November 2011 thought this is
kind of timely but unrelated to that Halloween incident.
Neil talked to enews at a gala for the LA Gay and Lesbian
Center and he said that him and David are not gay role models.
And he said I go out of my way to not be soapbox Johnny.
We're super happy to lead by example, but even to define
ourselves in any kind of leadership, leadership position
I think is awkward. I cringe when I hear people say
they consider themselves role models.
David agreed and said we don't really do anything.
We take care of our kids, we're in a relationship, we love each
other, but we don't go out of the way to stand on a soapbox
like Neil said. Yeah, I mean, given the whole
Amy Winehouse thing at this point that.
Was not a news story. Yet that's true.
I thought it was timely because it was.
I mean, there's a year later. Yeah, Well, they know they're
not perfect, clearly. Yeah, but.
Yeah, but I mean, that's also a lot of pressure.
I feel like, because there's not, that's the thing.
Because there's not that many openly gay, high, high, high
profile couples. It does put a lot of pressure on
the most famous ones. I know that other couples don't
have it. Does I have another bad thing
that? Should I share it?
Yeah. OK, Neil.
OK, I'm live with Kelly. Uh oh, and guys, excuse my
language. I'm quoting here.
Uh oh. Nearly used the word tranny
because he inhaled some sulfur hexafluoride, which is helium's
evil twin, during a science experiment that made his voice
sound lower. What?
And then I guess when it came back when the gas expired, he
said I've never sounded more like a tranny in my life.
He said. He said that on live TV.
Yeah, but then Neil Neil apologized for saying it and the
glad Gay and Lesbian Elite Alliance Against Defamation no
accepted the apology and said it's heartening to see a
celebrity of Harris's statue recognized and apologized for
using the slur in such a timely manner and for a greater media
attention being paid to its use. Many people do not realize that
the word excuse me guys, but tranny is one of the most
hurtful and dehumanizing slurs that transgender people here.
Most transgender people associate that word with
personal experiences of violence, hatred and division.
And it's crazy because at that time might not see it not long
ago. But seems like people didn't
even know that that word was like offensive because at the
end of the article it said glad verse Glee.
Is tranny a bad word? Or did they use that word on
Glee? I guess so.
Oh, I know. Yeah, I felt.
Glee was weirdly homophobic. I know it was also very pro gay.
Yeah, At the same time, yeah. So that yeah, that was a very
weird time in culture. And it was crazy.
At the end of the article they were like, is it a bad word?
Yeah. Wait, sorry.
I should say Glee was transphobic.
Yeah, yeah. I feel like I always knew it was
a bad word, but maybe that's revisionist history on my part.
I don't know. Gosh.
Yeah. Neil.
Neil.
Well, you know, I think.
That's good that his apology was appreciated.
I think that's doesn't happen enough.
So yeah, I think he learned. Wow.
But that's crazy that he just said.
It's like daytime TV ooh. He's raunchy, but do you think,
like, whenever I'm what I'm gonna say, always cut it out?
Like, as a member of the LGBTQ community, he might have felt
more comfortable to say it because he feels like we're all
like in a similar community, you know?
I feel like you do see that sometimes.
I don't know. I don't know, 2012 dinner and
2012 this. That out magazine article that I
keep referring to is a very long article.
Neil wrote more about their relationship and I thought it
was pretty open and interesting. He said if we have a fault, it's
probably over communication. When I'm cranky, I'm admittedly
cranky. When I'm in a hurry and
distracted, I can't act like it's any other way.
And he's good with that too. So we talk things out.
I don't want to paint a relationship like we met.
It's been happy family fantasticness ever since.
What defines a relationship is the work that's involved to
maintain it, and it's constantly changing.
Sometimes I'm deeply in love with David and head over heels,
and sometimes I question whether it's going to work out and is
meant to be. It's like a business
relationship as well as personal one.
We have a business together and that's maintaining our love for
one another. Oh, that's sweet.
It kind of runs me of the Obama. Yeah, I mean, too made me think
of that too. I think that's really, really
open to say that. And I also appreciate hearing
that. Yeah, the honesty because.
It's hard work, yeah. But also I feel like sometimes
people act like if you ever have doubt or like if you ever think,
I don't know, then that means like you should leave.
But I'm sure if you have relationships that are really
long, that's going to happen 100%.
You know, as they say, like thoughts can come and go.
Like you don't have to be attached to all your thoughts
and as long as you aren't happy that then you make the decision
to stay together like it seems like he is.
Yeah, but also you're not going to be happy in every time in
your life. And there might be times where
something else is going on in your life and then that makes
you doubt like. Oh, is it the relationship?
I mean, if you're together with someone that long, oh, sorry,
you're not going to be madly in love the whole time.
So I appreciate him saying that they apparently David and Neil
created a short lived TV series called Neil's Puppet Dreams
which was a puppet show I've. Never heard of it, I know.
And then that Halloween in 2012, the theme was Wizard of Oz.
OK, let me guess who everyone was.
Neil, I'm going to say was the. Ten man.
Yes. Really.
And David was the scare girl. Yeah.
How did you get? I don't know.
And then I bet the baby boy was the lion.
Yeah. And I bet the girl was Dorothy.
You're right. Wow, Mel, Mel is really good at
guessing these. Oh my God, that's so you know,
they do the family thing, but then they also come, they do the
adult thing. And they went to Katy Perry's
Halloween birthday party. And we have mentioned this party
before because Kristen Stewart was there.
Yes, I think we mentioned it in the Katy Perry episode.
Wait, was that the one when John Mayer was there?
Yeah, yeah, Neil and David were there too.
Oh my God. This party.
February 2013. The National Enquirer.
Who cares what they think? But the National Enquirer ran a
story that claimed that David and Neil, it called off their
wedding date. I feel like nobody trusts the
National Enquirer anyway, so I'm not sure why he felt compelled
to do this. But Neil tweeted, the National
Enquirer is Cray Cray. We've never had a wedding date,
just engaged Prop 8 and all. We're on a cruise as I write.
He's rad. All good.
Yeah, I feel like that. Almost like.
Exposes like some sense of insecurity.
You know, the fame, and maybe people being able to write
whatever they want about you. Are they still not married?
Not yet. Wow.
Still not married. And then June 2013, to celebrate
turning 40, Neil, David and the kids went to Disneyland
together, and it seems like they really like Disney.
And they go a lot. I can see that.
You know what? It is funny.
I feel like there is a strong correlation between people who
really like Halloween. And people who really like
Disney. Actually, I agree with you,
isn't it? I didn't think of some people
like that. Huge overlap, yeah.
And they love spooky stuff. Yeah, and Disney.
Huge overlap. Why is that?
I know, I wondered. So now do a thesis on that.
Yeah, the dressing up. The magic.
Yeah, being. Somebody else getting, yeah, the
make believe. I think, yeah, it's definitely a
personality type. They love the make believe Neil
hosts the Tony's for the 4th time.
Wow 2013 He's hosting Pro Halloween 2013.
It's Halloween again. I We do like every Halloween, by
the way. OK good.
I like the guessing. Keep giving me the theme for the
Twins Preschool Carnival. They dressed the kids as Alice
in Wonderland. Oh, I already gave it away.
Is Alice in Wonderland and the White Rabbit.
I can't remember which ones which, and the dads were
Tweedledee and tweedledum. Oh cute.
Yeah, cute. Sorry, I kind of gave it away.
No, that's yeah, we'll do the next one.
Next one. 2013, Neil was on HuffPost Live, interviewed by an
Australian journalist about his sexuality.
Of course, I feel like we always get Australian journalists
asking the uncomfortable questions.
Yeah, and I'm going to play a clip.
I have to ask you about being one of the first openly gay.
Stars. What was that experience like?
How do you mean? What?
What led you to do that? Was it just a logical, obvious
thing for you to do? And why do you think fewer, more
people didn't do it? Oh well, the second question is
a big giant answer. I mean, like, there's a tricky 1
to answer for me. I you know, I fell in love with
a dude and started spending all my time with him, and therefore
you don't want to be like, suppressive of that.
And so as I started working more with like more frequently, with
more eyes on us, I figured that that was inevitability.
And the opposite would be, again, suppressive and like we
found ourselves going to movie premieres.
And then wondering like, well, what is that?
So you're gonna go, you'll go around the other side of the
I'll go down the red carpet by myself.
But if we go down the red carpet together, then are we making
some sort of statement by doing so and so And then I didn't want
to disrespect David on either direction.
I didn't want to make David feel like he didn't exist in my life.
And at the same time I didn't want David's identity to be the
guy that's dating me. So.
It's a very individual thing, you know.
I think we live now in a time where people seem less concerned
about who you're effing and more importantly, who you fall in
love with. It's not quite such a freak show
kind of aberration. Certainly 13, yeah.
Yeah. So I think to the the second
part of your question, like why don't more people do it?
I mean that's an easy thing to say, but if you're struggling
with any of that yourself, you can't just go like, oh, OK and
then do it like it's little baby steps of acceptance in your own
personal sphere. And then in in, you know you
have to choose the times that feel right to you to make moves
and. And those moves could be for
various reasons. So I think it's a super
individual thing. What do you make of of people
outing other people? I mean, Lance Bass recently made
made a little bit of news by saying that he knows obviously
other celebrities who are closeted and he has to sort of
lie in order to to keep them in the closet, to keep their cover.
I presume that you know other people who we don't know about.
Well, I'm a magician, so I'm really good at lying without
letting you know I'm doing so. But what do you make of people
who out other people? Well, it just depends on the
context, I guess, right. You're never going to want to,
you're never going to want to say anything to, like freak
people out. You don't want to say anything
to prove a point. Like, I don't think.
I don't think like doing it in sort of an exploitive way makes
any sense. Again, I just feel like that
whole world is very personal. And so to nudge.
I think it's not a good idea. I mean, there are certain people
who, you know, For example, last week Gawker supposedly outed
Shepard Smith this this Fox News post.
Now, I didn't know that there was any closet around him.
I just always assumed that everybody knew that he was gay.
A bit like Anderson Cooper or something.
And. Again, like with those people,
you're choosing to watch them feed you information.
Their job is is for you to is to gain information from them.
So from their point of view, I can totally understand why you
wouldn't want people who may have a biased against you if
they know more about your personal life to be watching the
news that you're giving and already thinking that you're
slanting it in a specific way. That's the other person's bias,
not theirs. But I can understand why they
wouldn't want to put their own personal world into that.
So I I I can understand why they would not want to.
Be doing that in that specific instance.
Yeah, I mean the. Anderson or something, Anderson
tells the News. Yeah, he has conversations with
people about newsworthy subjects, and so he
understandably probably didn't want people to know a lot about
him because that's not his job, you know?
I don't want to know about Walter Cronkite's exploits.
I want to watch Walter Cronkite read the news to me.
You don't know what that means either.
Flesh your heart. He was a.
Newscaster. I know who was it was?
Oh my God, the wind know Patrick Harris.
In the beginning, he was like. He, I know he puts his head
back. He's like, what do you mean?
Yeah, you know, that would scare me.
But this journalist didn't even seem fazed by it.
Yeah, it's so funny. But I mean, I do think it is a
interesting question like it. I mean it is a unique
perspective that Neil Patrick Harris has that he was one of
the first open link gay high profile celebrities of the 2000s
and. It is a fair question, I think,
but it's weird that the journalists seem to be saying,
well, if we all know anyway, then yeah, what's so wrong about
it? And he's like, well, you don't
really know. Yeah, exactly.
I mean, it makes sense too. It's Oh my God, you know,
Patrick Harris, the way he speaks, like people laughing.
I wonder if that's why his character on How I Met Your
Mother is like, that's what I thought he kind of is a little
bit, way more over the top. I watched some of some clips to
prepare and he's he's a lot more of a player, almost like a
comedic Chuck Bass. And yeah, Chuck bass is like
darker. But he's always saying things
like, oh, I'm going to go talk to that girl or.
But he doesn't have a little time of intimidating.
Yeah, he is something about he's.
Not going to smile to make you feel comfortable.
He seems friendly, but there is something intimidating about
Yeah, I don't. And he's actually said that.
Oh, interesting, he said. People say I'm intimidating and
I don't know why. He does seem mad, yeah.
I'd be nervous meeting him. I know David seems really nice,
though. I don't.
You'll see him in a second. But in 2013, they went out to
dinner with Elton John for Elton's birthday.
I love Elton. Just cool with their friends.
But weirdly, a few months later there was a picture of Neil
Elton. OK, I feel like really gossipy
for sharing this. I feel like I'm like People
magazine or something. Picture of Neil Elton, Elton's
husband. David Furnish.
Yeah, and David Burka taking group picture.
And in the back, you can see David Furnish is touching Neil's
butt. That's cute.
David Furnish. Oh, David Furnish, Elton John's
husband. Oh, is.
Touching Neil's butt. What are you gonna show me The
picture? And then from the front, Neil
looks very serious. He's not smiling.
How can you? See the back of the picture I
have to find. I have a folder of.
With their multiple angles, yes. OK, ooh, that is disrespectful.
It's crazy. That is bad.
I don't know what the deal is. Because confused about whose
butt it was. OK, this is from the front.
That's David Furnish, Ellen's husband.
And here's Neil Elton, obviously.
Then there's David breakup. Ellen doesn't look that happy
either. I know.
And then on the back, Oh my. God, wait, He's touching Neil's
butt. He's touching Neil's butt and
that's. A grab?
Yeah, he is. He's cupping it.
Yeah. Ooh, what's the deal?
And then this is the deal. It's the piss.
Neil does not look cabbie. It's really like.
I'm I'm standing next to Elton John, a legend I cannot use his
husband of. Just like grabbing my ass right
now. I know it's just a picture, but
David Furnish looks so creepy. Like his smile, just knowing
that he's smiling. So big.
And then doing that. That is creepy.
But here's the weird thing. They hang out with Elton and
David Furnish many times after this, so I don't know what the
deal is. Yeah, maybe it's just like a
joking thing. Maybe.
Very weird. Interesting.
David Birkin know about this? Well, we know about it, so he
probably does. Yeah.
I I was shocked. That's also near the end of my
research. You know, you almost sometimes
miss things. Yeah.
And you're like, wait a second. Yeah.
Oh, my God. So not sure what's going on
there in 2014. OK, remember I kept mixing up
David Burtka with Justin Bartha? Is there a reason?
Well, one time they were both at the all three of them were at
the Stand Up to Cancer event and they posted pictures together.
I don't have, I don't have it with me, but I was like, wow.
OK, here is Justin Bartha with David Burtka.
This is what I've been waiting for.
I need to look up Justin Bartha. It's just because of their
names. They don't look like, no, I
don't think they look like. I mean, they're both have brown
hair. Yeah, well, you know, I'm not
with pieces, but it's purely the last name.
Anyway, March 2014, the family finally moves back to New York.
They bought a townhouse in Harlem.
Neil returned to Broadway in Hedwig and The Angry Itch, and
about their Harlem townhouse they did a video for
Architectural Digest take. I think this was a little later,
but taking them through the house, it's a very charming
brownstone and they have a lot of art.
I know. And David said, OK, this is
where I got the eclectic thing from, because their house is
very quirky, Lots of interesting objects and art and collectibles
and weird things. And David said he'd been doing
taxidermy lessons. Weird.
Maybe the cake was yeah, that's a little telling because they
had some taxidermy. They had a lot of quirky things,
like look at this type of things, like little people in
the wall with a 3D diorama inside.
It's actually really cute. They had a flip book on the wall
that's of the family. They had an old phonograph.
Seemed like they probably really enjoy going to antique stores
together. It's a bit crowded, it's a bit
cluttered in there. But I relate.
I mean, I I kind of live like that too.
A lot of custom art of their kids, tons.
Their staircases covered in pictures, completely covered.
Yeah, it's cute. And all their Halloween pictures
are on the wall. It's really cute.
This place is full of all their art.
Like, no, some celebrities, their houses are really they're
like them, white. Yeah, no, this place is like,
there's there's a sculpture here.
Quirky little thing here. There's this thing, this thing,
this thing. Like, there's so much stuff.
I do have appreciation for maximalism.
Me too. I I thought I was really
refreshing. And it's really cute how much
they have of their kids on the walls.
Like, you can tell they love them.
They talk about them all the time.
It seems like they're really good dads.
Yeah, and I thought it was funny.
One of Neil's most Priors possessions is one of the
stretching portraits from the Disney's Haunted Mansion.
I guess he got it at a auction. Oh wow.
And he's he's very particular riding.
He's like it's my prize revision.
No one's allowed to touch it that he has like a little
barrier thing. All that's that you.
Yeah. So that's why I was like, OK,
he's very type A like he, he likes his things, you know?
Yeah, I really May 2014, Neil was on the cover of Rolling
Stone, naked with just a top hat covering his junk.
He's pretty scandalous. I think it's because he was in
Hedwig and the Angry Itch, It's, you know, it's kind of a raunchy
play from 2014. They were both on Oprah and they
talked about previously dating women.
I thought I would share this. Clip Yeah, I'd love to hear
their voices together. What word do you all use?
Fiance usually or because you can't use the word.
I just think partners the strangest word, yes, because I
meet now, I meet grown businessmen and he's like, this
is my partner Jim, and I don't know if they're in business.
Together. Or if they're a gay couple.
Or they're Cowboys. Stole my punchline?
Not dare. You did you ever at any point?
Because I've read that you both have dated women, right?
Yeah. Good times.
Yeah.
Were you? Were you?
That's explain that to me because you know, I I have a gay
friend who said that the only way you could have sex with a
woman if a man's picture was on the headboard.
So. So that's classy.
So did you go out? Did you date?
Did you? I dated a fair amount.
I didn't really feel like I'm a liar and I'm gay and I'm doing
this and I wish I wasn't. But I did feel like it wasn't
clicking like it was supposed to, and I kept wondering it was.
Me. Was it by dating?
I mean, you actually, like, had sex with girls.
Yeah. Yeah.
You too. Oh, yeah.
Oh yeah. Yeah, he's crazy.
Oh, yeah. So did you think you were
bisexual or is there such a thing?
You know, with the Kinsey scale. I don't know if you're familiar
with that. Of course I am.
I've done the Oprah show. Hello the what?
I wait a second. Here.
No, but I think there is a a raging scale of sexuality and I
think you can go to one side or another.
So tell me, would you have come out when you came out and had it
not been for Perez Hilton, did he?
Well, probably not that at that time day.
But I certainly felt it was an inevitability at that time we
would go to. How I Met your other events
together and everyone knew David and that we were a couple, so I
wasn't hiding anything, but it was just never a big
announcement that I was needing to make.
However, I felt like at a certain point red carpet things
became complicated because I'd go down the red carpet if I went
down the red carpet and he didn't go with me, it looked
like a slight to him. And if we went down the red
carpet together then it looked like we were making some sort of
announcements and so it just always felt a little.
Uncomfortable. Yeah, you know, and isn't it
interesting once you actually came out, that was like a like a
nonstarter. Like you're one of the few
actors who's been able to come out and absolutely nothing
happened to your career. Everybody's so afraid of making
that announcement or letting people know.
I think only positively, honestly.
It allowed me to to live more full body and not feel like I
was going to be exposed. I was kind of exposed and you
asked about the Perez Hilton question earlier.
And I think the the reason that I made the statement when I did
was because was he was the catalyst.
Because what he had done was posted a request for anyone that
had ever any scandalous stories or had slept with me or whatever
to come forward and talk about it so that it would out me.
And I didn't want to have to make that statement about my
sexuality in response to a scandal.
And I think by doing so, I end up having being able to stand a
little bit taller. And that that transparency and
authenticity was kind of appreciated.
Interesting. They were all barefoot in this
clip for some reason. Maybe that just made them feel
more comfortable. Yeah, I don't know.
Funny. And Neil was sitting with his
legs crushed. That was funny when Ober was
like, of course I've heard about it.
Some people believe that Oprah and GAIL I know.
Yeah, there's been a lot of rumors.
No, she denied it. Yeah, I I think that they're
just best friends. But Oprah really went there,
too. She really did.
I mean, that was a great question.
Would you have come out at that time if it weren't for pres?
He'll say, yeah. And the red carpet thing is
really, I like that he talked about that because it it seems
like something that's kind of silly, like walking down the red
carpet, but it's like. That's something that other
couples don't need to worry about.
And it does seem like maybe it's a slight to someone that's like,
OK, we're deliberately arriving here separately.
We're hiding something. I feel like that would make a
relationship feel less real anyway.
Yeah, that would be sad that he's hiding David from the
world. Yeah, exactly.
I feel like, you know, it's kind of surprising Oprah asked those
questions, but I feel like they just rolled with it.
Yeah, they he definitely was a lot more open than with that.
Australia, what do you mean? What do you mean?
Yeah, and she hasn't. They've had sex with the.
Women. Yeah, that's crazy.
Yeah. She was like, were you bisexual?
But it's like, again, like, Oprah has the respect from
celebrities that, like, they're not going to push back on it.
Yeah. Yeah, it is interesting that
they dated women's and it seems like they enjoyed it, but just
like it never really clicked in that way.
You know, sometimes I've wondered because like I got got
a lot of days with a lot of different men and often it
doesn't click for me as easily as it does for it seems, other
people and like I've been very picky.
And then that has made me wonder, like, what if I'm not
straight because I'm not as into.
Well, I there have been some boys, I've been crazy and you
have, but but I never feel feelings for women.
But I do wonder in like their explanation of this, like, did
they still feel attraction for men?
Because I always hear those stories from people where
they're like, I realized I was gay because I it just didn't
click with. Yeah, the opposite.
I feel like they're just not saying.
Yeah, for some reason. I don't know.
Yeah, that's probably way too there's no open for me.
No, But I feel like there's no way that that's it.
Yeah, but they just felt like what they must.
But sometimes I do hear explanations from people that
sound like that. And I'm like, wait, but did you
did you feel attraction otherwise?
Well, I don't know about David Burka, but I didn't include it
in this. But Neil did say that he knew he
was gay from a younger. Oh, OK, yeah.
Or at least at least that he was attracted to men.
I don't. I don't know if that means he
wasn't attracted to women. But yeah, no.
Yeah, that makes sense. I do think that Kinsey skill
thing is interesting. I don't know enough about that.
I don't remember the direction, but it's kind of like.
You explained this to me one time though.
That like fluidity. That.
No, that, like fluidity and sexuality is a lot like taste
buds where it's like. You when you're young or
something, you might be like, I don't like spicy foods, but like
that. It's not like that.
It's a stagnant thing that someone might.
I said that, yeah, you explained to me I was like that.
Wow. Because I was explaining that to
my parents. Because when back I feel like 10
years ago, sexuality, the narrative was like, oh, you're
Born This Way, which I think is 1 or the other.
Yeah, like it's something that you're born with.
And then I was like explaining to my dad recently, Oh, now it's
more about fluidity. So like.
You might feel one way and then ten years later it might evolve
in some way. Or well, that's like some people
who maybe dated people of 1 gender for a long time and then
they seemingly like switch and people wonder, were you lying?
Yeah. And people will often insist
like no, they weren't and that they still are attracted to men
or women or ever. But.
People did that with Kristen Stewart all the time.
Yeah, they like. OK, my neighbor, my neighbor,
Every time he walks up those stairs, it's like he has to
stomp. It's so weird.
But yeah, but also not anybody's place will be.
Like you were lying. I know, OK, obviously this is
just a measurement, a tool that people have created.
All these things are not like in, you know, it's it's just a
tool someone created. But the Kinzi scale is it's zero
to 6. Zero is strictly heterosexual,
100% heterosexual, and then six is exclusively homosexual.
And so then one would be like, this is what it says on the
website, so it's predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally
homosexual, and then it moves up to more than incidentally 3,
equally for mostly queer, but more than incidentally
heterosexual. So, so people say it's like a
scale like some people are. Yeah.
It's very simplified. Yeah.
Version. Yeah.
So there's somewhere, they're saying that there's somewhere on
the scale that they're not like on one side of the spectrum,
Yeah, yeah, that's what they're saying.
Also in this Oprah interview, they talked about the comparison
of their careers and David said that sometimes Neil's
recognition and success does put him through a shame spiral and
but then that is what inspired him to become a chef.
And Neil, no, David said I do a lot of things, a lot of things.
Not great, but parenting is what he's best at.
And he said that they share everything, even clothes, but
not underwear. OK.
Yeah, they laughed about that. David said that he's more
maternal than Neil, and Neil agreed and.
Yeah, I don't get maternal from Neil.
Neil said that he struggled at first parenting a few months,
but he says he feels like and now the kids are older.
But he said he feels like he his strength will be more like
talking with the kids and stuff that he doesn't have That, like,
yeah, maternal instinct where if the baby's crying that he knows
what to do. Or, you know, David's better at
that. Apparently Oprah asked if they
want more kids. Such a aunt type of thing to
say. And Neil says, oh, don't start
with this question, David. And then David says I want a ton
of kids. Oh.
David's Yeah, I know. And he says I was told you
aren't really a family until your kids outnumber you.
Why? No, it's been a while though.
I wonder if they don't have kids.
I think the surrogacy process is probably very hard, though if I
had to guess, I don't think they will.
Yeah, I mean, it's really nice. They had twins.
Oprah even had their parents on. Oh wow.
The show and asked them about it was very much about, you know,
their sons being gay and how did they feel?
And David's dad, it was actually so sad because, you know,
David's mom has passed away. David's dad start crying.
He said that. He said the one thing I regret
most of my life is that his mother didn't see where David is
in his life and didn't meet his kids.
He said that apparently. David said, you're never going
to see my kids, Mom, we're going to have kids.
You're never going to see my kids.
My God, that breaks my heart. Well, I believe.
I believe in hope that she still gets to see them.
I know it was really sad and all the parents, I mean, people get
cancelled. We're saying this now, but all
the parents were like, at first I really struggled and I didn't
get it and the lifestyle and whatever, but then they came
around. I think it's important for them
to openly admit that. Yeah.
Because give you hope. Yeah, exactly.
You know, even people that are really uncomfortable with it,
we're able to do a 180. Yeah.
You know, again, 2014, there were rumors that David and Neil
had split. I don't even know where the
rumors came from. I couldn't find the source, but
Neil disputed them. Again, I don't know, but they've
been engaged for eight years at this point.
Wow. But finally, September 2014,
they were finally married in a small ceremony in Italy.
Oh, when I asked you earlier, I thought you meant not yet.
Now oh. OK, they did get married in
2014, and apparently they were officiated by the How I Met Your
Mother. Director Pamela Fryman and Elton
John performed live at the reception.
They had been waiting a long time for this.
I think it definitely meant a lot to them.
It was a big deal and I was laughing about this the other
day. Their wedding invitations were
so over the time I couldn't even believe it.
So basically there were like clues.
There was going to be, there was going to be during the wedding
weekend. Everybody had some kind of tasks
and there were clues leading to what they had to do.
And I don't know all the details because they didn't share all
the details. So I don't really know what it
all means, but basically everybody was sent a wine crate
with herbs and Rosemary and a candle and bottle of wine, bread
and a message in a bottle with a disk drive.
Oh my God, that you could play. And it was like lost.
Like the TV show Lost with a cryptic message of clues and
people had to figure out where the wedding was from.
I'm just picturing them like in there.
Very cluttered hall sitting there like laughing to each
other, like, OK, how can we make this even better?
That's so. Funny, I couldn't mess it in a
bottle with a disk drive in the bottle.
I don't even know how that works.
I didn't get that out. You just smash it.
I was cracking and I guess like at the weekend, the wedding
weekend in Italy, there were all these clues within pictures and
objects. For people to solve, it was very
interesting. That's so funny.
Yeah, you have to rely on your guest being enthusiastic to
participate. So I hate when people show up
and they're like, wow, what is this?
It was a pretty small wedding, so I think I hopefully knew that
people were gonna be into it. But yeah, that made me laugh.
October, Halloween again. The family dressed as iconic
actors. Oh, the.
I'm not gonna guess this. Yes, Neil was Charlie Chaplin.
David was Groucho Marx. Harper was Marilyn Monroe.
I know. She was actually so cute.
It was so cute to see this, like little Marilyn and Gideon.
Gideon. Gideon was James Dean.
Also so cute. And the kids are just adorable.
I don't know how they sound now, but Harper had this little
accent, like she didn't pronounce her R's.
I thought it was so cute. They're probably teenagers now,
right? Yeah, they are. 2015 Neil hosted
the Oscars. Wow.
He's such a host. People said this show was
largely forgettable. Who cares?
I know. Besides the moment when he
presented Injustice Tidy, Whitey's was supposed to be a
Birdman reference. Time stamp?
Yep, OK 2015 Halloween. The whole family dressed as Star
Wars characters. OK, I'm going to get Neil
Patrick Harris. Was Luke Skywalker.
No, no, no. I'm going to backtrack.
I'm going to guess that the baby boy was Luke Skywalker and the
girl was Leia, and that David was Chewbacca and that Neil was
Han Solo. Oh, Darth Vader, Actually, OK
David was Han Solo, and I think Neil was Obi Wan Kenobi.
Oh, no one's Chewbacca. No, no one was Chewbacca.
OK, yeah. Good guesses though.
Halloween comes again 2016. The whole family dressed as
Batman characters. OK, I'm gonna guess.
I'm gonna guess the baby boy was Batman.
And that the girl was I got it. And that the girl was Batgirl.
And the the you don't can't tell what she is.
She ever read the little Cape? Maybe that's.
Back. Maybe that is Batgirl.
Wait. And then David is Robin and Neil
is the Joker. David is the Joker.
Neil is. I don't know who.
Yeah, I'm not as familiar with the Batman.
Quizzler. OKI got the Riddler.
The Riddler? Yeah, the quizzler.
Keep it in. Keep it in.
Wait, do you mind if I could take a bathroom?
Ohh. Yeah, let's take a break.
All right, we're back. Right back 18, Halloween, the
family all dressed up as ghosts. So kill you.
Just not guessing, really, that one.
In 2019, online, in publications, there was like
this big debate about whether straight people should play
queer people on film and TV. And you'll surprise a lot of
people in the times, the UK Times, saying I think there's
something sexy about casting a straight actor to play a gay
role if they're willing to invest a lot into it.
And he also said in our world that we live in, you can't
really, as a director demand that an actor be gay or
straight. Who's to determine how gay
someone is? I played a character for nine
years who was nothing like me. I would definitely want to hire
the best actor. Yeah, I mean, I I really do know
where people are coming from with that argument, but it would
be weird for people to have to disclose their sexuality before.
Taking a job? Yeah, I think legal.
Yeah, I think it probably is. And like, that would force
people to come out. They weren't already.
It would be so weird if, like, you weren't publicly defining
your sexuality for the whole world and the people got mad at
you because you had a role. And what if you were like, well,
actually I am by or something. Like it would just.
Be I don't know. Not.
Yeah. I feel like there isn't really a
way to verify it. Yeah, but yeah, people were
surprised. He said that.
Also in Try 19, David published his first cookbook, Life is a
Party. They left a party Halloween.
The family dressed as famous artists.
Picasso, Van Gogh. That's all I got.
No, no, Neil was Van Gogh. Oh.
Well, I said that Vanel Picasso. Oh, what you said.
What did you say? Picasso.
Van Gogh. Oh, I didn't know you said Van
Gogh, but no Picasso. David was Salvador Dali, OK?
Harper was Frida Kahlo. I was gonna say that.
And Gideon was Andy Warhol. Oh, that's a good one.
Halloween 2020 Family dressed as characters from Willy Wonka and
the Chocolate Factory. Okay.
One is Willy Wonka. I'm going to say that's David.
One is the grandpa. I'm going to say that's Neil.
One is Violet would be the daughter, and the son is
Charlie. You got almost everything right.
Besides the grandpa, Yes. So Gideon was Charlie, Harper
was Violet, David was Willy Wonka, and then Neil was.
I can't remember what this character's name is.
He seemed a little creepy. I think he turned out to be a
good guy. He wore a little like bowler hat
and her glasses whispered in the kids ears.
Oh yeah, What was his deal? He seems like a bad guy, but
he's like, not. He was kind of.
I forgot he was like a spy. Yeah, but that's who, Neal.
Oh. That guy that is a really like
niche character to do that doesn't stand alone.
I know, I guess, that they're all standing together.
Like if you saw the Willy Wong, he'd be like, that's Willy Wong.
Yeah, Charlie wouldn't really stand alone either, but I know
he's holding the was a golden ticket.
I don't. Know.
I'm guessing they base it off of the classic yes.
The classic, yes. And 2021.
David and Neil were on the podcast Double Date with Marlo
Thomas and Phil Donahue. I thought they were super open
on this podcast they were talking about.
They're talking about open marriages and how a lot of guys
they know do have open relationships, but that they
felt like they couldn't do it. And it was funny.
David was saying I would, I would have a tracker on his
phone. I would just, I would be losing
it. And it thought it was cute and
they were just saying it wasn't for them and that, but they were
super open. They were saying that in the
first three years of their relationship, their sex life was
amazing, but then they have to, you know, try to keep the spark
and stuff, but. Inventive.
And I also was like, wow, amazed at how open they were being,
especially talking about monogamy and just just the fact
that they brought that up, that some people do that.
And yeah, yeah, but it's cute. And I relate to the jealousy.
Oh yeah. So I appreciated.
That I would definitely track her on someone's Halloween 2021.
We're back to Halloween. This time they dressed as
classic horror movie characters. Should I guess if you if you
can. Yeah, I'm going to say like it.
No. OK, this is too hard.
I don't watch work. I know, I know.
Neil was Patrick Bateman. David was Jack from The Shining.
OK, Harper was the girl from The Exorcist.
Gideon was Chucky. Oh, cute.
I know. Very creepy though.
Yeah, very creepy. April 2022.
It was their 18 year anniversary of their first date in on
Instagram. David made a post about it and
explained why they honor it every year.
He said we always celebrate the first date because for seven
years of our relationship it was against the law to get married.
Neil Patrick Harris, I love you over and over again, year after
year. Thanks for working so hard and
for putting up with me. Here's to another 18.
And then Neil shared a picture of them hugging and gazing into
each other's eyes. And he wrote.
Our first date was 18 years ago today.
And David Burka, I am not about to let you go.
Thank you for showing me the capacity of my heart.
Yeah, that's sweet. Very sweet.
Yeah. The first the anniversary, it's
weird because like for some couples, I feel like it's when
they were exclusive. And then for some it's the first
date. For some, might be even the
first time they met. Oh yeah, that's.
No, that's too early. Well, what if they went on a
date? Like the next day maybe?
Yeah, yeah, it sparks. Immediately flew.
Yeah. Like if they met at a bar and
gave each other. Yeah.
A number, Yeah. Yeah.
And that would be people totally disregard that.
Just do wedding marriage. Yeah.
Do you think it's OK or two over the top to celebrate multiple
days? Depends on how long you dated
for before you got married. Like, my parents only dated for
six months, so I they don't celebrate their dating
anniversary. But I would want to.
I don't like how it it's almost wiped clean because like, what's
our 2nd anniversary? What?
Oh my God, did you see our cousin Julie?
Sorry, this. You guys don't care.
She's been married for nine years.
Really. Today.
Oh wow. That.
Feels like it was just yesterday.
Next dude, 10 years. That's crazy.
Wow. I was.
I was first like, oh, that must be their dating anniversary.
Yeah, it's their wedding anniversary.
Congratulations. Julie, Julie and George.
Yeah. This one's for you.
Random Halloween 2022. The family dressed as fast food
characters. Oh, that is so cool.
I know. I loved it.
OK, Speaking of, do you still have your French fries shirt?
Yes. OK, good.
Yeah, I love that shirt. And I have a burger shirt too.
Oh, nice and hot. I saw a picture of it the other
day. I was looking at pictures and I
was like, I haven't seen that shirt in a while.
I think take it. Wait.
I think I do. It's probably in at home in.
Yeah, it's a summer, whatever. They dressed as fast food
characters. Do you want to guess?
OK, I'm going to guess David was Ronald McDonald and Neil was
Burger King. And I feel like I don't know any
other fast food characters. So there are there like
multiple? Is it 1 like the Hamburglar that
is A? Oh, and Wendy, the daughter is
Wendy. You were right for those three.
You were totally right. Neil's Burger King.
David was Ron McDonald Harper with Wendy, and then Gideon was
Colonel Sanders from KFC. Oh, that's cute.
It was really cute. I like that idea.
Yeah, wait, that's a really. I know, sounds so.
Now we're almost at Halloween 2023.
What will they be? Oh my gosh, you don't know yet.
I'm excited to see. I'm anxiously awaiting.
This is going to be like my new Met Gala every year.
What are they going to be? And whenever they call
themselves as a family, do you know, I think Bertka Harris.
Bertka Harris Yeah, make sure I was.
Throwing. I was thinking Patrick would be
in there, but that's his middle. Yeah.
It's Burka Harris.
Burka Harris, the burkas Burka Harris.
Family. Yeah, the kids will be thirteen
soon, so sometimes. Kids at that age don't want to.
That's what I was wondering, Like, are they still going to
want to dress up with their dads?
Oh my. Hope they don't break my heart.
They don't. Oh my God, I'm sure this is a
discussion they've been having. Kids get embarrassed that age.
Oh, come on kids, you're gonna so cute.
You're gonna want, like when you look back to have done that.
I know. Throughout your whole childhood.
That's so special. I hope even if they do stop
someday, maybe they'll start again.
Yeah, that's really cute. Yeah.
Special kids at that eat delay. I just want you my own thing
with my friends. But why am I saying like, their
parents are celebrities? Maybe they would still do the
picture and then do their own thing.
Yeah, probably. Ohh, imagine being a teenager
and your dad's like, get in the outfit.
Yeah, no. Yeah.
We're doing this. I bet the kids are now involved
in like, what the what? The concept is too.
Yeah, probably. Oh, that must be so.
Fun. I bet they think about it all
year. I know they're so into it.
Are they into other holidays too?
Like, do they go big on? They certainly do go big on
Christmas. Yeah, seems like they decorate a
lot. And so, yeah, sweet.
Yeah. Professionally, Neil was
recently in the Netflix show Uncoupled.
I haven't watched it, but it sounds interesting.
And then David just joined an Off Broadway revival of the play
God of Carnage in NYC. So he's acting in New York
somewhere, right? Maybe we'll run into them.
Maybe. I know they live here.
It's. I mean, I think they have a
house in California too, as people do.
But yeah, and that's that's them.
Can't wait to see what they are for Halloween.
I love. That that was such a cute
couple. They are really cute.
Controversial controversy, like some controversies, but that's
always tough because I found myself really wanting to like
them. But I also did think that that
meat platter was. So disturbing.
It is really disturbing. And I mean it really goes to
show like when you want to like someone.
Otherwise you are more like, how can I defend this, you know?
I know. But I I did like them more than
I expected. And there have been some people
I researched for this show that I thought I was really going to
like him, and I didn't. So that guy's got Fitzgerald.
Oh, yeah. Like he he disappointed me.
Yeah. Yeah, but I still really enjoyed
doing those episodes. Those were like some of my
favorites. But it's just complicated when
you cover humans. Exactly.
It's complicated. Now who is our next couple?
Give us a hint. This will be our Patreon
episode. Next Patreon episode is quite
spooky. They are kind of gothic.
They both are known for a dark vibe and they're a modern
couple. Think I know another modern
couple you think you know. All right.
Well, I'm excited. And if you don't already, give
us a follow on. Instagram and every single week
we do guesses before the episode we team.
These days, we'll do prizes. Yeah.
And we'll go back and find the. We've had some people that
always guess it, yeah, we're going to give you a prize, but
we're trying to make this show, you know, bigger until.
Then, yeah, yeah. But we super appreciate
everybody on page one, everybody listening.
Thank you so much. And we'll get back together next
week. We'll get back together next
week. Is your heart peeled with pain?
Shall I come back again? Tell me, dear, how are you?
Long turn. Turn on.