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My experience with online dating
and some tips from Mark as well,

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hopefully to just help us be 
safer going forward and make 

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sure that you know, everybody's 
going to enjoy the online dating

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still for anybody that is 
especially know for the LGBTQ 

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plus community. 
So yeah, let's just dive right 

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into that. 
I'm really excited to share 

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everything with you. 
So thank you for having me on 

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here, Mark. 
No, you're totally welcome. 

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Yeah, we've been talking for a 
little while and we thought 

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about different approaches and 
how we're going to 1. 

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Tell your story and and but I 
thought we should set the stage 

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because the modern era where the
time that we all live and how do

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you meet someone or hook up or 
or get to know someone, we're 

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all busy. 
We all live in our little 

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bubbles. 
We all have devices in our hand 

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and that's how we communicate 
with one another. 

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This is a great obviously a 
piece of technology as far as 

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how we're communicating right 
now is how we met. 

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But on the darker side of it, 
there are some bad people. 

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There's wolves and sheep 
clothing. 

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There's predators, there's scam 
artists, romance scammers, and 

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there's outright criminals. 
Like outright criminals. 

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So. 
Some of them are are good, 

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right. 
They can fool the best of us and

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and so let's just talk about 
some safety tips and so let's 

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talk about this then. 
With everything that you've been

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through right now at your age, 
you know your life experience 

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and let's say that you were 
going to go on a platform. 

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What would be the best advice 
you'd give someone listening 

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right now if you could like, 
start right now all over The 

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Time Machine, starting all over 
again. 

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Jamie. 
Yeah. 

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I think if I could start over 
and go back on a dating app, 

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There are just a few tips that I
have that I think would have 

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really helped and keep me safe. 
Even though you may think, oh, 

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you know, it could never happen 
to me. 

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It's always just better to be 
safe than sorry. 

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So these are the things that 
looking back, I know would help 

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me. 
So the first one that I have 

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would be to tell somebody that 
you're close with maybe a friend

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or sister, sibling, maybe even a
parent, if you are comfortable 

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with doing that, Just anybody 
that you are comfortable with, 

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telling them the address of 
where you're going and when you 

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should be home. 
That way, if it gets past a 

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certain time and they try to 
reach out to you and maybe 

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somebody who you live with. 
If you do have a roommate or 

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somebody that is also living in 
your home and they still can't 

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reach you, maybe that's when 
they can take further steps to 

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ensure they're able to find you.
Maybe calling the location if 

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that's a restaurant and making 
sure you're still there or 

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whatever though that may be. 
The next step, yeah. 

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And so the next step that I have
would be to if you are using 

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Snapchat, this is just 
specifically for Snapchat, OK. 

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A lot of people will send you a 
photo over the chat that you can

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use on Snapchat. 
And the important thing that I 

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would say is to make sure that 
you get a real time photo. 

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And that would mean when they 
send you a photo and it shows up

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with the red box and you click 
that red box to open up the 

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Snapchat. 
I'm sure everyone will know what

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I'm talking about when I use 
that term. 

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But that's just a good way to 
confirm that that's actually the

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person you're speaking to. 
Oh. 

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OK, yeah, so the next one that I
have is actually an app that I'm

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going to recommend that some of 
my friends use and it's called 

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Life 360. 
OK, yeah, this app is really 

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great because you can share your
location and it can tell your 

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friends where your battery life 
is AT, and they can remind you 

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to charge your phone if you are 
out and about or before your 

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house. 
Yeah, so I really like that. 

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Even if I'm on FaceTime with my 
friends, they tell me, hey, you 

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know, charge your phone. 
Wow, so that one's really great 

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because there's a lot of 
different safety apps safety 

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tips on there. 
When I post this, I will. 

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Put those links in in the post 
as well. 

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OK, yeah, that sounds good. 
Maybe I'll have to. 

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I'll share the app with you, but
yeah, that one's really great. 

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Another one just if you have an 
iPhone. 

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I'm not sure if this this is for
Androids, but if you do need to 

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call 911, if you're pressing on 
your your right side button and 

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your volume buttons five times, 
it'll call 911 for you. 

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Oh, that's solid. 
Yeah. 

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So that one's just really good. 
Just to know if you are worried 

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that you know, you know you're 
holding your phone and you're 

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kind of worried on you're 
walking down the street and 

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you're feeling uncomfortable, 
that's just a good, you know, 

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kind of one of those key 
clenching things that. 

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If yeah, yeah, no, that's really
good if you see someone kind of 

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walking near you and you don't 
want to make it obvious. 

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Yes. 
Yeah. 

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Yeah. 
That's actually pretty solid. 

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No, that's really good. 
Yeah. 

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OK. 
So let's let's think, let's talk

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about this for a SEC then. 
OK. 

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So now right you you did like 
this is like this, let's go back

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here because you're talking 
about you're at this stage that 

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you're talking about, we're 
making the assumption that. 

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You've already chatted with this
person for a while. 

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They seem decent. 
They seem you know you, you 

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built the rapport with them and 
now you're going to go meet for 

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the first time. 
So these are the these are the 

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safety precautions that you 
recommend. 

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What would be some of the 
instant red flags like open and 

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like for me? 
I'll tell you some later, but 

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would just be AF. 
No effing way. 

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He is next, right? 
Yeah, I think definitely. 

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I mean, most people I think 
would not, but obviously if you 

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can't see their proper face or 
you know their name isn't 

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proper, like I've had a lot of 
people that you would see where 

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it's like, what do you call 
that? 

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Just like MJ or. 
Oh yeah. 

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Like abbreviation. 
Yeah, yeah, abbreviation. 

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That's concerning to me because 
if you're going to go on a date 

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with this person, you're 
spending your time, especially 

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in a not public area. 
Oh yeah, yeah. 

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Then now. 
J Dog. 

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Yeah, yeah. 
Like, who the heck is J Dog now?

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Who's talking to tell the police
that J Dog did something to you?

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That's very concerning to me, 
so. 

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I think it's concerning you got 
their full name it first and 

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last. 
At least it would be probably 

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ideal if you're going to meet 
with someone. 

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You know, it was a red flag for 
me like this is when I did 

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online dating long time ago when
they when you would like, you 

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know send a message, an instant 
reply back and wanting to hook 

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up right away like you know this
the like that was like, hey, 

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what are you doing right now? 
I'm. 

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I'm not so far free. 
Can I come over or I'm at a 

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hotel and I'm like, whoa, whoa, 
yeah, like they're too, too 

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quick to, you know, too quick 
and you and all and for and then

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too many compliments, right. 
Oh, you're so hot, you know, You

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know what I mean? 
Like, they were just poured on, 

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poured on really thick fast. 
Because I'm thinking either 

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they're intoxicated or they're 
trying to smooth you up, right? 

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Yeah, no, I definitely had 
someone that that at first I 

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thought for the first, you know,
bit of the conversation, I was 

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like, oh, this person seems 
cool. 

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And right away they wanted to go
on a date and they wanted to go 

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camping. 
It's like, oh please don't 

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murder me. 
Yeah, Camping. 

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Yeah. 
No, I'm not going camping with 

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anybody unless I know you well, 
right? 

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And especially if you're a 
woman, you're gonna go some guy 

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who wants to take you out in the
woods. 

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And what, middle of nowhere? 
No cell phone service? 

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Yeah, that's a red flag. 
Definitely. 

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It's definitely not a good first
date. 

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No, no, not at all. 
Some of the other ones for me 

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was. 
The pictures are obviously the, 

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you know, pictures that are 
really fuzzy, poor, or just like

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you read the profile and it this
looks like everything's copied 

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and pasted. 
Oh, that's very concerned. 

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Or were you? 
Were you like, is this someone 

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who's like an Instagram star or?
Oh yeah, yeah. 

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It's going to be true. 
It probably is catfishing, Yeah,

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that. 
Don't believe it. 

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There's like, this guy's so hot,
and I'm thinking, if it's too 

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good to be true, honey, it 
probably is. 

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Because why would that guy be 
talking? 

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You know, if you're thinking, 
why would this guy be talking to

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me? 
They probably aren't. 

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Yeah. 
And the pictures are are are, 

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you know, stolen from someone. 
And yeah, there was like ones 

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like that too and like from, you
know, back and they were, it's 

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like the pig, you know, you 
know, talking like A10 model, 

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you know, beautiful vacations, 
parasailing, you know, like 

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every photo is like picture 
perfect, right? 

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And then it's like, yeah, yeah, 
that's just too polished 

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sometimes. 
Definitely not gonna be her 

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showing. 
Up. 

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Yeah, for sure. 
OK. 

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So some of the. 
OK, so let's say this. 

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Now you're past that phase. 
Now you're you're talking and 

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then maybe you know what were 
some maybe I'll share some and 

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some red flags you've had where 
you're in that talking stage, 

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Shane, you're in the texting 
back and forth. 

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If somebody's asking you for 
nude photos, that's a big one. 

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Oh yeah. 
Yeah. 

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We've got to get out of the way.
Of course. 

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I think that one's really I I 
understand once you've met, but 

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I think if somebody hasn't met 
you and they're doing that, they

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might not have any intention of 
meeting you at all. 

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Yeah, that's creepy, Yeah. 
Yeah, that's unsub experienced 

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that before. 
Yeah, as a young, young teen. 

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And that's like to the point 
where, you know, I just think 

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it's inappropriate, especially 
if you haven't met somebody. 

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I think you shouldn't be doing 
that unless you really know a 

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person. 
Because even if you think, OK, 

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you know, it's on Snapchat, they
can't screenshot. 

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There's apps that do get, 
there's apps that can get away 

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away from that. 
And so there's a lot of tips 

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that can do that on, you know, 
there's hacking side of tips, 

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right too, right. 
So there's. 

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Things, yeah, their side. 
So you got to think about that 

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when you are sending pictures 
online, never assume that it's 

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going to just that person for 
just that one. 

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Oh, totally. 
Yeah. 

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No, you never know where your 
pictures are ending up. 

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Totally. 
And that. 

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Yeah, that's as creepy too, 
right? 

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That that would. 
Yeah. 

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I I've had it on the on the 
opposite where it's Internet 

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land where, yeah, it could be a 
it could be a weird place. 

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And I I had, you know, women 
send photos and they're like, 

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whoa. 
And it's like you're right in 

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the beginning of chatting. 
That's again, it's probably not 

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her, right? 
And and it's problems and when 

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they're for me, my biggest red 
flag was when they're trying so 

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hard to get you to go somewhere 
come meet at me, da da, da. 

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That I don't like that where 
it's just too much pressure to 

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meet. 
The second would be or if they 

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need money that happens to dudes
a lot can you can you cash at 

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me? 
Da da da da da. 

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Yeah that happens a lot to guys,
right. 

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And you're just being built if 
you're if you're being strung 

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along. 
And I'm just saying this is for 

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the guys because this happens. 
You know, the guys. 

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Who are lonely and you know 
they're being milked. 

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Yeah. 
And it's probably a catfish too.

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Yeah. 
And I think that's yeah, where 

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that like too good to be true 
really should play in like, you 

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know, I I don't think anyone. 
It's like, oh don't go out of 

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your comfort zone a little bit. 
Don't go up a bit, you know. 

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I think there's levels to like, 
you know, if you feel like I'm 

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not that cute, like you could 
still date a cute person girl. 

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Like, you know, but like, I 
think there's levels. 

226
00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,920
Like if you feel like this 
person looks like a supermodel, 

227
00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:09,880
maybe. 
Yeah, they are. 

228
00:11:11,200 --> 00:11:13,200
You brought up something too, 
and this happens. 

229
00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:18,640
This has been happening to young
men and they're they either go 

230
00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:23,760
on like Grinder, get extorted, 
or they get where they're 

231
00:11:23,760 --> 00:11:28,120
sending nude photos. 
And then they're being 

232
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:30,800
blackmailed. 
And it was like two young hockey

233
00:11:30,800 --> 00:11:32,360
players. 
One was like 17. 

234
00:11:32,360 --> 00:11:34,400
I think it was 2. 
They're both like 1718. 

235
00:11:34,600 --> 00:11:36,800
They both ended up committing 
suicide because of the they 

236
00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:39,640
thought would, you know, their 
careers are ruined and, you 

237
00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:42,120
know, they make some kind of 
embarrassing video because they 

238
00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:44,400
think they're, you know, you 
know, The thing is, is this, 

239
00:11:44,400 --> 00:11:47,560
this is the reality, right? 
And the and the When you are in 

240
00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:50,640
a relationship with someone, 
when you actually are right, 

241
00:11:50,840 --> 00:11:53,080
there's things between you and 
your relationship that are 

242
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:56,240
private. 
And for some people this is 

243
00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:59,360
important because they they can 
trick people that they're in a 

244
00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:02,680
relationship and that is a whole
done another dangerous rabbit 

245
00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:04,360
hole too. 
And that's where people can get 

246
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:05,680
exploited, right. 
So. 

247
00:12:06,240 --> 00:12:09,400
So that's why like as as far you
know, we you could talk about 

248
00:12:09,400 --> 00:12:11,800
the humorous side of dating and 
stuff like that. 

249
00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:15,000
You know the the funny profiles 
in the catfish. 

250
00:12:15,000 --> 00:12:17,840
Sometimes it's a little, you 
know, again, it's a little, it's

251
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:19,600
a little bit of a chuckle, you 
know what I mean? 

252
00:12:19,600 --> 00:12:21,720
In in a kind of an unfortunate 
way. 

253
00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:23,720
Oh you they got you. 
Ha ha ha. 

254
00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:27,280
But when it gets darker, when 
someone gets hurt and gets, you 

255
00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:30,280
know, you know, going down the 
darker rabbit hole, it this is 

256
00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:34,240
how the, the, the entrance of 
this journey starts, right? 

257
00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:36,560
Yeah. 
Well, and I think a lot of 

258
00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:40,560
people too, this is something 
that I did want to mention is I 

259
00:12:41,240 --> 00:12:44,120
people can try and gain your 
trust first. 

260
00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:49,480
And then still do things that 
you know so could not be good 

261
00:12:49,480 --> 00:12:51,800
for you. 
So I think just because you did 

262
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:55,280
meet someone first, definitely 
don't be putting your trustful 

263
00:12:55,280 --> 00:12:56,600
in. 
Make sure that you do have 

264
00:12:57,240 --> 00:13:00,600
proper knowledge of the person 
and you did actually get to know

265
00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:04,440
them well before you are willing
nilly willing to go out with 

266
00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:05,840
somebody and not. 
Yeah. 

267
00:13:05,840 --> 00:13:08,440
Or or exchanging intimate stuff 
online. 

268
00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:09,880
Right. 
That's going to be used to 

269
00:13:09,880 --> 00:13:12,560
exploit you. 
Or like they're like we go into 

270
00:13:12,560 --> 00:13:14,760
like, you know, deeper as we in 
this conversation. 

271
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:17,880
You know, even romance scams 
these guys that just fleece 

272
00:13:17,880 --> 00:13:20,680
these women, they they target 
middle-aged women, middle-aged 

273
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:23,320
women that just had a divorce or
just widowed. 

274
00:13:23,560 --> 00:13:25,880
These women are heartbroken. 
They're lonely. 

275
00:13:26,040 --> 00:13:29,280
Mr. Prince Charming comes along 
and they always have like this 

276
00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:32,040
amazing story. 
Oh, I'm an Air Force Colonel. 

277
00:13:32,040 --> 00:13:34,640
You know some. 
I have to be away and on in 

278
00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:36,840
dangerous missions. 
That's why I can't call you 

279
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,160
because. 
And then really, they have 

280
00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:40,200
another family or another 
victim, right. 

281
00:13:40,600 --> 00:13:43,200
And they, they, they ruin these 
women's lives. 

282
00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:46,680
And I've seen a, like, there was
a date line that had one guy, he

283
00:13:46,680 --> 00:13:50,320
pretended he was a race car 
driver and he was like fleecing 

284
00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:52,280
all, Oh yeah, he was a real 
scumbag. 

285
00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:53,320
Yeah. 
He was all these, you know, 

286
00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:55,480
those, you know, like the 
outfits at the race, you know, 

287
00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:58,320
the the racing outfits they wear
and has all the patches and 

288
00:13:58,320 --> 00:13:59,360
stuff. 
Oh yeah. 

289
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,200
Yeah, he would mail them to her 
house and say, oh, can he take 

290
00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:04,640
this and dry clean. 
I'll be back from Indianapolis 

291
00:14:04,640 --> 00:14:05,360
soon. 
Honey. 

292
00:14:05,560 --> 00:14:08,480
I'm just on the circuit and this
does make you know give her hope

293
00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:12,720
that Herman's coming back from 
racing cars and but you know, 

294
00:14:12,760 --> 00:14:17,040
yeah, but yeah, but this is what
I'm saying is that they they 

295
00:14:17,040 --> 00:14:20,240
rope you in and this is what I'm
saving for people listening. 

296
00:14:20,560 --> 00:14:24,200
We all, myself included, we can 
be taken in by someone, 

297
00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:26,320
someone's charm. 
You're lonely. 

298
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:29,080
You're in a bad spot. 
They're they. 

299
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:32,720
They usually do what? 
What I've talked a lot about and

300
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:36,680
and the Narcissus Abuse Podcast,
I made the love bombing. 

301
00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:39,720
So let's talk about love bombing
being a red flag. 

302
00:14:39,720 --> 00:14:40,480
You know what? 
It's good. 

303
00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:43,520
It feels good to have someone 
hey, your hair looks great. 

304
00:14:43,520 --> 00:14:45,760
You look, you're you're my type 
or whatever. 

305
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:49,320
But then there's a dark side of 
it when it's love bombing, 

306
00:14:49,600 --> 00:14:52,920
right? 
Yeah, I think that's important. 

307
00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:54,400
And maybe we can. 
I'm not sure. 

308
00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:58,520
I think it would be good to 
maybe explain for everybody what

309
00:14:58,520 --> 00:15:00,440
that is. 
And yes, yeah. 

310
00:15:01,440 --> 00:15:03,440
It's powerful. 
It works, yeah. 

311
00:15:03,600 --> 00:15:04,280
Exactly. 
Right. 

312
00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:06,000
So love bombing. 
Is this right? 

313
00:15:06,280 --> 00:15:08,600
Jamie, you are amazing. 
You. 

314
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:09,920
You. 
Oh, my God. 

315
00:15:09,920 --> 00:15:13,040
I I don't know if I could ever 
live another moment without you.

316
00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:16,640
You're my soul mate. 
When I'm with you, you know the 

317
00:15:16,640 --> 00:15:19,160
sun doesn't set. 
You go on and on you go. 

318
00:15:19,160 --> 00:15:21,160
Heavy flattery. 
It could be that. 

319
00:15:21,160 --> 00:15:24,560
Or it could just be gifts. 
Hey, here's 1000 bucks here. 

320
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:27,680
We're gonna go fly somewhere. 
We're gonna, I'm gonna buy you a

321
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:30,160
cute dress and get you that 
purse you like. 

322
00:15:30,160 --> 00:15:32,560
And hey, have you had your hair 
done in a little in the last a 

323
00:15:32,560 --> 00:15:34,360
little while. 
Oh, let's take you my favorite 

324
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:35,400
salon. 
You know what I mean? 

325
00:15:35,600 --> 00:15:38,000
When that You know, in that 
moment, let's say you've been 

326
00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:40,640
through a really shitty time and
your last boyfriend was an 

327
00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:43,480
asshole, right? 
Now you got this guy, He picks 

328
00:15:43,480 --> 00:15:45,800
you up in a nice car. 
He takes you up to nice places 

329
00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:49,320
to eat, buys you the nice purses
perfume. 

330
00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:52,400
You know what I mean? 
Wow, where's this guy been? 

331
00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:57,360
And then then one day that guy 
finally walks into the room and 

332
00:15:57,360 --> 00:16:00,000
you see him for the first time 
and he's nothing like that, 

333
00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:02,080
Yeah. 
Well, and I think the time frame

334
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:05,720
too, I think the time frame will
definitely be based on the type 

335
00:16:05,880 --> 00:16:08,920
of person that this that you're 
dealing with. 

336
00:16:09,640 --> 00:16:13,320
Some people are able to hide it 
in front of other people and 

337
00:16:13,320 --> 00:16:16,720
some people are able to hide it 
for a little while until maybe 

338
00:16:16,720 --> 00:16:19,640
they have anger issues and now 
their anger is not able to be 

339
00:16:19,640 --> 00:16:24,080
controlled. 
Or depending on how you react to

340
00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:26,840
things, could be when they break
down. 

341
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:31,440
So that's when you really have 
to be careful and realize what 

342
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:33,600
you're dealing with, which can 
be really hard, especially if 

343
00:16:33,600 --> 00:16:35,360
you do start getting feelings 
for the person. 

344
00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:37,440
Oh totally. 
And that's the thing. 

345
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:40,280
Some like, I I know guys. 
So you know I've been in sales. 

346
00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:42,960
I've been in court. 
There are silver tongue devils. 

347
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:45,080
They I like. 
I know I, I even some of my 

348
00:16:45,080 --> 00:16:47,680
friend who passed away, I talk 
to him on the podcast. 

349
00:16:48,320 --> 00:16:50,000
That's what I used to call him, 
the silver tongue. 

350
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,200
He could talk his way out of 
anything. 

351
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:56,240
Or if you listen to that little 
Paul Bernardo interviews that 

352
00:16:56,240 --> 00:17:00,080
guy, he's he's sitting at a 
table full of cops. 

353
00:17:00,440 --> 00:17:02,640
He makes those cops look like 
chump change. 

354
00:17:03,160 --> 00:17:05,119
Yeah. 
So imagine being one-on-one with

355
00:17:05,119 --> 00:17:07,480
that guy and you're trying to 
get him to back off your 

356
00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:10,040
boundaries. 
That's so tough. 

357
00:17:10,119 --> 00:17:11,560
There's some people that can 
ratch it up. 

358
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,319
Yeah, for sure. 
For sure. 

359
00:17:13,319 --> 00:17:16,040
So the thing about this podcast 
too is to educate people because

360
00:17:16,040 --> 00:17:18,560
you know we talk like you know 
I'm I'm I'm just you know when 

361
00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:20,960
I'm just talking. 
I'm talking about things that 

362
00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:23,560
over time are easy to spot. 
Right. 

363
00:17:23,560 --> 00:17:24,920
You need because you'll think 
back this. 

364
00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:28,680
Why is this guy so so harsh with
me In the beginning he'd Take Me

365
00:17:28,680 --> 00:17:29,000
Out. 
Bye. 

366
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:30,600
Bye then you. 
Then your brain will go. 

367
00:17:30,600 --> 00:17:32,640
Oh my God. 
He he wrote me in. 

368
00:17:33,040 --> 00:17:34,560
Like you said, some people are 
just subtle. 

369
00:17:34,560 --> 00:17:36,560
If they're your best friend, 
they're your support. 

370
00:17:36,560 --> 00:17:39,600
But really they're waiting for 
those little moments to, you 

371
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:40,760
know, break you down. 
Right? 

372
00:17:40,880 --> 00:17:43,000
You see it sometimes. 
Like, you know what I mean? 

373
00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:45,400
Like when you really need them, 
they're not there, right? 

374
00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:48,200
That kind of person, right. 
But that we're going farther in 

375
00:17:48,200 --> 00:17:49,920
the relationship stuff. 
So let's back up. 

376
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:53,600
OK. 
So let's rewind then to your 

377
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:57,080
What are your red flags when 
you're in that texting back and 

378
00:17:57,080 --> 00:17:58,880
forth? 
I'll tell you some of mine. 

379
00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:01,360
For my example, I've. 
I remember I met this lady 

380
00:18:01,360 --> 00:18:03,120
online, never met her and she 
was nice. 

381
00:18:03,120 --> 00:18:05,160
We had conversations, we talk on
the phone. 

382
00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:09,720
But she would be like the moment
I'd wake up, text to the time I 

383
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:11,520
went to bed. 
It was just too much. 

384
00:18:11,800 --> 00:18:13,120
Like, I'll just like, you know 
what I mean? 

385
00:18:13,120 --> 00:18:16,440
When it feels suffocating and 
then too needy, then it's like 

386
00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:20,720
we may not be a bad person, but 
then it's like, you know, what 

387
00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:22,200
are you getting you? 
You know, you don't want to get 

388
00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:24,040
involved with someone like that 
because there's there's 

389
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:26,400
something more going on. 
Yeah. 

390
00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:31,000
Well, and I think another one is
when they're asking you a lot of

391
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,560
questions, but you're not 
getting much information out of 

392
00:18:33,560 --> 00:18:36,600
them, if you feel that. 
Oh yeah, yeah. 

393
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:39,720
If you feel that you're telling 
them a lot, but they're not 

394
00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:43,080
giving you a lot, then there's 
probably something going on 

395
00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,000
there that they're hiding. 
Yeah, that's a good one. 

396
00:18:45,000 --> 00:18:46,120
Yeah, that. 
Yeah, totally. 

397
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:49,000
I'm making something like they 
ask you lots of questions, but 

398
00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,440
then you ask something, it's 
just sort of like brushed off or

399
00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:54,960
very like minimal. 
Yeah, yeah, exactly. 

400
00:18:55,520 --> 00:18:57,400
They're probably married. 
Yeah. 

401
00:18:57,600 --> 00:19:01,440
They may be married or not, who 
they say they are, or probably a

402
00:19:01,440 --> 00:19:04,000
bad person and they don't want 
to give out their identity. 

403
00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:08,440
Maybe there's something that's 
already happened and they're 

404
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:10,720
kind of scared. 
And if they are planning 

405
00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:12,480
something, then they're not 
going to want to give you a lot 

406
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:15,880
of information. 
And I think that's definitely a 

407
00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:19,840
really important thing to know, 
because if you were going to do 

408
00:19:19,840 --> 00:19:23,560
something and that you wouldn't 
want people to know about, why 

409
00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:26,240
would you want to give that 
person a lot of information 

410
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:29,640
about yourself? 
Yeah, yeah, totally. 

411
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:33,560
No, that totally makes sense. 
OK, let's, let's go now. 

412
00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:36,440
We're now, we did a first date. 
We're doing a first date. 

413
00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:39,120
What are your red flags or first
dates? 

414
00:19:39,360 --> 00:19:43,200
Red flags or first dates? 
It's just like me rolling back 

415
00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:46,480
to the bad first dates if 
someone is wanting to have sex 

416
00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:47,760
with you right on the first 
date. 

417
00:19:47,760 --> 00:19:50,640
Of course there's things I know 
sometimes you can have a 

418
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:55,640
spontaneous moment where you're 
really into it and it's going 

419
00:19:55,640 --> 00:19:58,760
well, but I think that's when 
you have that good rapport and 

420
00:19:58,760 --> 00:20:00,560
you are feeling close to that 
person. 

421
00:20:01,040 --> 00:20:04,560
But there can be times, and I 
think a lot of women can speak 

422
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:07,520
for this and maybe even some 
other people as well. 

423
00:20:08,520 --> 00:20:12,400
I just know from my friends 
telling me as well that 

424
00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:15,720
sometimes you haven't even 
really gotten into a proper 

425
00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:18,840
conversation and this person is 
already trying to jump your 

426
00:20:18,840 --> 00:20:20,240
bones. 
Oh, wow. 

427
00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:21,600
Yeah, too, too. 
Yeah. 

428
00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:22,720
Yeah. 
Too hard. 

429
00:20:22,720 --> 00:20:24,520
Too hard. 
Like too pressure. 

430
00:20:24,520 --> 00:20:27,120
Too much pressure. 
Yeah, that's that's not cool. 

431
00:20:27,120 --> 00:20:31,200
Because again, it's like, for 
me, I'm just saying if it, then,

432
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:33,520
then you're not looking at the 
person as an individual. 

433
00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:36,080
You're the object. 
Yeah, and it's like the moment 

434
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:38,320
wasn't even there. 
You're just kind of like you're 

435
00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:40,600
not trying to get to know me. 
There's clearly an. 

436
00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:43,160
Alternative motive. 
And of course, like, there's 

437
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:45,080
times where that's 
understandable and that's 

438
00:20:45,080 --> 00:20:47,440
actually talked about. 
Like if you guys have explained 

439
00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:47,880
that. 
Yeah. 

440
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:52,320
But not like just yeah, if you 
haven't even had a dinner or. 

441
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:54,880
OK, get to know. 
I mean, yeah, I don't know that.

442
00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:57,240
Yeah, that. 
And that's also too Then that 

443
00:20:57,240 --> 00:21:00,160
goes in the realm of risky sucks
studs. 

444
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:03,120
And and for my opinion, someone 
doing that, I'm. 

445
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:05,680
I'm gonna assume that they're 
either drunk or they're on 

446
00:21:05,680 --> 00:21:08,400
something that, you know, either
just so impulsive, like, you 

447
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:10,560
know, Hey, come here, baby. 
You know what I mean? 

448
00:21:10,560 --> 00:21:13,280
Like it's for me. 
It would cry like they're 

449
00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:16,600
probably high too on something. 
It yeah, it's definitely 

450
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:18,800
concerning. 
Or to me, it's borderline 

451
00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:21,200
predator vibes. 
Oh, hell yeah, absolutely. 

452
00:21:21,200 --> 00:21:22,600
You know, kind. 
Of what you're saying like those

453
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:26,320
Gray line predators, people that
are just like out to do that, I 

454
00:21:26,360 --> 00:21:28,400
understand. 
Like people like there's a 

455
00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:31,800
difference between being a Gray 
line predator, especially for 

456
00:21:31,800 --> 00:21:35,880
anybody that is out there, maybe
even wondering if this is you. 

457
00:21:36,160 --> 00:21:38,560
Hopefully not. 
But you know, like I think it's 

458
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:40,800
important for people to know, 
like there's a difference 

459
00:21:40,800 --> 00:21:45,280
between a Gray Line predator, 
which is someone who is what you

460
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:48,920
said before wanting to do these 
things with you and willing to 

461
00:21:48,920 --> 00:21:51,240
take it as far as you'll let 
them versus. 

462
00:21:51,760 --> 00:21:54,360
Yeah. 
Versus somebody who is. 

463
00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:59,600
You know, like just actually 
there and wanting to be with 

464
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:00,880
you. 
Like there's different. 

465
00:22:01,120 --> 00:22:04,800
Yeah, there's very differences 
in that and versus somebody 

466
00:22:04,800 --> 00:22:07,080
who's just wanting to have sex 
too. 

467
00:22:07,400 --> 00:22:10,640
So when you just want to have 
sex, it's like, OK, hey, I'm 

468
00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:13,200
going to talk to you. 
You're going to be consenting. 

469
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:15,160
I'm making sure you're 
comfortable as you're going, and

470
00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:19,600
that's OK to be someone who is. 
Actually active and wants to do 

471
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:21,880
the yeah with boundaries and 
communication. 

472
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:24,240
Exactly. 
But when you're Gray Line 

473
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:26,640
Predator, you're not allowing 
that the boundaries and 

474
00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:30,400
communication and you're just 
trying to push them, even if you

475
00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:33,840
feel their discomfort. 
And the the point of this 

476
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:38,320
podcast too, is truly to make 
give people food for food for 

477
00:22:38,320 --> 00:22:41,320
thought and be safe. 
Because if you put yourself to 

478
00:22:41,320 --> 00:22:43,880
say this, OK, we're just taking 
that scenario that you just 

479
00:22:43,880 --> 00:22:47,040
talked about. 
You go meet someone, you think, 

480
00:22:47,040 --> 00:22:51,080
hey, we're just gonna meet up, 
have a conversation, Netflix and

481
00:22:51,080 --> 00:22:53,680
chill. 
And the second you walk in the 

482
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:57,080
door and you know he's trying to
get your pants off, yeah, I 

483
00:22:57,080 --> 00:22:59,640
would be like get the hep fuck 
out of there first of all, 

484
00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:01,120
right? 
And that that can. 

485
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:02,960
Be hard for a woman to really 
understand. 

486
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:05,040
What is the difference when 
you're in it? 

487
00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:08,080
It's not as easy as when you're 
out of it I. 

488
00:23:08,080 --> 00:23:11,080
Never realized that until I got 
older and became an adult. 

489
00:23:11,360 --> 00:23:14,520
It's not easy to tell what is 
the actual situation when you're

490
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:17,560
the person in it, because you're
not having that bird 's eye 

491
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:18,200
view. 
You're. 

492
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,440
Not having hindsight is 2020 
because you know how it ends 

493
00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:23,600
when you're looking at it. 
From another person's 

494
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:26,280
perspective, But when it's 
yours, there's a lot of thought 

495
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:28,880
that goes into it. 
It's not just their side. 

496
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:31,160
It's your side too. 
I don't know for sure. 

497
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:34,800
And that's what I'm saying. 
And and yeah, that that's that's

498
00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:38,680
you know for me again I have a 
daughter I would not want her go

499
00:23:38,680 --> 00:23:40,320
meet some go, go. 
Hey baby. 

500
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:42,880
You know like I I I'd be there 
for 2 by 4. 

501
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:43,920
But yeah. 
Yeah. 

502
00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:48,440
The the the problem is is that 
there's some people that that 

503
00:23:48,440 --> 00:23:52,720
can't not be impulsive. 
And and if you're that type of 

504
00:23:52,720 --> 00:23:56,000
talking to men, listening, if 
you're that person that can't 

505
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,960
control themselves, you're gonna
get you're gonna get yourself in

506
00:23:58,960 --> 00:24:00,160
trouble. 
You're gonna end up hurting 

507
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:03,960
someone, and you might meet a 
dad that's not too happy with 

508
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:05,880
what you did too right? 
So. 

509
00:24:06,040 --> 00:24:10,400
And I think the number one thing
for those people is just work on

510
00:24:10,560 --> 00:24:15,000
really understanding consent and
just consent, consent, consent 

511
00:24:15,000 --> 00:24:18,360
because as long as that you have
consent and without forcing 

512
00:24:18,640 --> 00:24:22,400
consent, without force, yes. 
OK well that that was a, you 

513
00:24:22,400 --> 00:24:26,080
know like you know the worst in 
my opinion like on a first date 

514
00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:30,640
that type of really impulsive 
high pressure to do something 

515
00:24:30,640 --> 00:24:32,200
sexual. 
If the person's not comfortable 

516
00:24:32,200 --> 00:24:34,040
that you know that that's a 
pretty, you know what I'd say 

517
00:24:34,040 --> 00:24:37,080
pretty much in that, you know 
that bad zone of the spectrum. 

518
00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:40,080
So let's dial it back a bit. 
So we're let's say you're at a 

519
00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:43,520
dinner table with this person. 
What would be some of the things

520
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:46,120
that would give you a red flag? 
Like you're not alone with them 

521
00:24:46,120 --> 00:24:48,680
yet, but you're, you know, 
you're beating them first time 

522
00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:50,960
and you're sitting at it across 
from a table from them. 

523
00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:56,400
I think this is not for 
everyone. 

524
00:24:56,400 --> 00:24:59,640
Some people that do have money 
are still not great too. 

525
00:24:59,640 --> 00:25:02,760
But I think of course a guy that
wants you to pay for the food, 

526
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:07,840
or if you're not, if they're not
necessarily even taking you to 

527
00:25:07,840 --> 00:25:10,040
out to a proper dinner. 
Sometimes that is a bit of a 

528
00:25:10,040 --> 00:25:11,480
concern. 
Because why? 

529
00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:12,880
What are their intentions? 
Really? 

530
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:17,040
Yeah, like like they're like, 
for example, like I I get what 

531
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:19,960
you're saying. 
So how I'd break that down if if

532
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:21,520
I'm interested in a woman, I'm 
single. 

533
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:23,800
I wanted her to feel comfortable
with me. 

534
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:25,920
I want her to have a good time. 
I wanna have a nice we wanna 

535
00:25:25,920 --> 00:25:28,120
have go out and have a nice 
evening together and whatever 

536
00:25:28,120 --> 00:25:31,840
happens, spontaneously and 
consensually, it happens. 

537
00:25:31,840 --> 00:25:36,680
There's no necessary 
restrictions, but there's no 

538
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:40,080
it's gonna be happy ever after. 
Cuz we're going on a day either,

539
00:25:40,080 --> 00:25:42,800
right? 
So I I want to, you know, put my

540
00:25:42,800 --> 00:25:46,880
best face forward. 
If I, if I arrive and I'm being 

541
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:48,760
cheap, oh can you pay for my 
food? 

542
00:25:48,760 --> 00:25:51,280
Obviously I'm not going on my 
way to impress her so, but then 

543
00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:54,920
if I still want her to still be 
intimate with me after, I don't 

544
00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:56,960
really care about her. 
Yeah, yeah. 

545
00:25:57,560 --> 00:25:59,600
You know what I mean? 
I want something from her, but I

546
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:01,600
don't really care about her. 
And that's the difference. 

547
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:04,000
If someone cares about you, they
want you. 

548
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:05,960
They want you to feel at ease 
and they want you to be at your 

549
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:08,080
best. 
You know, for for your sake and 

550
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:08,520
theirs. 
Yeah. 

551
00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:12,680
No, I completely agree. 
You know what's my big red flag 

552
00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:17,600
is, is how you know. 
Say you're meeting someone at 

553
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:21,320
the first for the first time. 
My big red flag is how they 

554
00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:26,720
treat the staff, the waitress, 
the waiter, the busboy, the the 

555
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:31,160
Hostess. 
Again, if if I if I'm on a date,

556
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:35,840
if they were rude, 
condescending, overly Karen Ish 

557
00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:38,560
for a minor thing for I'd find 
that embarrassing. 

558
00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:41,200
But I I would have like there 
would be no second date. 

559
00:26:41,600 --> 00:26:44,800
Yeah, that is so true and that's
that's something I totally 

560
00:26:45,320 --> 00:26:47,920
didn't think about, but that's 
very true. 

561
00:26:47,920 --> 00:26:52,280
I think that's first of all turn
off and second of all it could 

562
00:26:52,280 --> 00:26:57,920
be a look and. 
To how they could possibly treat

563
00:26:57,920 --> 00:26:59,720
you in the future. 
And even if it's not how they 

564
00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:02,400
would treat you, why would you 
want them to treat anyone else 

565
00:27:02,400 --> 00:27:03,960
like that? 
I wouldn't want them to meet my 

566
00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:06,000
family because how are they 
going to talk to them? 

567
00:27:06,360 --> 00:27:09,480
Yeah, like how they treat 
strangers is usually a good 

568
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:13,160
diagnostic of how they're going 
to treat you when they're angry,

569
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:16,240
drunk, or fed up with you. 
Right, Yeah, yeah. 

570
00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:18,400
Well, and especially, how is 
that person once they're 

571
00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:22,080
intoxicated? 
And I think that's another thing

572
00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:24,920
as well when you are going out 
on a date with someone. 

573
00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:27,760
And you are at dinner. 
Are they ordering a lot of 

574
00:27:27,760 --> 00:27:29,360
drinks? 
I think it's OK. 

575
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:32,040
To obviously have some drinks on
our first date, but there gets 

576
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:34,720
to be a point. 
Yeah, they're getting sloppy. 

577
00:27:35,080 --> 00:27:37,880
Yeah, you don't need a sloppy 
date. 

578
00:27:37,920 --> 00:27:40,080
It's very concerning. 
Especially you, you know you 

579
00:27:40,080 --> 00:27:43,000
don't want them to be driving. 
You definitely want to pay 

580
00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:46,240
attention to that. 
I think it's important because 

581
00:27:46,240 --> 00:27:48,880
there's definitely been some 
people that I've heard of where 

582
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:52,200
you they realized pretty 
quickly, maybe not on the first 

583
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:54,720
date, but OK, this person's 
drinking a bit much and. 

584
00:27:55,160 --> 00:27:58,800
Not that, you know, of course, 
everybody, everybody deserves to

585
00:27:58,800 --> 00:28:02,400
get the help that they need. 
But I think it's important to me

586
00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:05,160
with a healthy be in a healthy 
relationship, right? 

587
00:28:05,160 --> 00:28:07,160
Oh, for sure. 
And I'm telling you straight up 

588
00:28:08,360 --> 00:28:10,800
for me where I am at, course I 
have kids. 

589
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:12,640
That's a whole different 
consideration. 

590
00:28:13,000 --> 00:28:16,160
I cannot be with someone that 
does not have control over 

591
00:28:16,160 --> 00:28:18,520
substances. 
It just it would just, it would 

592
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:21,680
cause, it causes such a chain 
reaction because, you know, I 

593
00:28:21,680 --> 00:28:24,080
live in this tightrope house, 
cigars with my kids. 

594
00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:25,560
You know what I mean? 
It's like you're getting up. 

595
00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:27,880
You're you got to do, you got to
with little kids, you got to be 

596
00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:29,520
very engaged and active with 
them. 

597
00:28:29,520 --> 00:28:32,200
If I'm drunk and hungover, I 
have a partner that's drunk and 

598
00:28:32,200 --> 00:28:33,760
hungover. 
Oh, that's not going to work, 

599
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:36,120
right. 
So for me, that would be 

600
00:28:36,120 --> 00:28:38,120
because, you know, again, that's
my consideration. 

601
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:40,920
Have some drinks, have a good 
time. 

602
00:28:40,920 --> 00:28:45,240
No big deal, right? 
But when having drinks doesn't 

603
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:47,880
become a good time, especially 
for the people around them, 

604
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:52,000
yeah, then it's not cool, right?
Yeah, yeah, I completely agree. 

605
00:28:52,720 --> 00:28:56,120
So Davy, so let's just do a 
quick recap then because we'll 

606
00:28:56,480 --> 00:29:01,040
we, we started off with your, 
your first safety tips of 

607
00:29:01,040 --> 00:29:03,120
location, telling a friend, 
right. 

608
00:29:03,760 --> 00:29:05,520
Letting someone know where 
you're going and who you're 

609
00:29:05,520 --> 00:29:07,840
going to be with. 
You know, pretty solid, pretty 

610
00:29:07,840 --> 00:29:10,960
practical, common sense advice, 
but it's important to do right. 

611
00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:14,200
Yeah, exactly. 
And again, if you guys did want 

612
00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:17,640
to check out the Life 360 app, I
think that's very useful. 

613
00:29:18,600 --> 00:29:21,560
And looking on your settings on 
your iPhone, there's a lot of 

614
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:23,960
great safety tips. 
I'm sure that they have them on 

615
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:28,120
your Androids as well, as well 
as sharing your location like 

616
00:29:28,120 --> 00:29:32,080
you said with other people and 
getting get making sure to get 

617
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:34,120
their proper first and last name
guys. 

618
00:29:34,200 --> 00:29:37,400
Yeah, they know exactly their 
actual name. 

619
00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:39,280
Yeah, yeah. 
Wow. 

620
00:29:39,720 --> 00:29:44,000
Basic, but you know. 
TJ is generally not the person. 

621
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:52,880
Yeah T dog and then we then we 
also ended it. 

622
00:29:52,880 --> 00:29:59,800
We talked about my red flags was
being really like we talked 

623
00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:02,400
about love bombing. 
Like they have a lure, right. 

624
00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:05,000
If you don't know someone and 
they want to take you to Mexico,

625
00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:07,840
for example. 
Or you know something really 

626
00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:09,560
ritzy. 
Yeah. 

627
00:30:09,760 --> 00:30:12,240
Or or if you don't really know 
them a while and you're gonna be

628
00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:14,760
take you somewhere where where 
you're gonna be alone for it 

629
00:30:14,760 --> 00:30:16,280
with them and you don't really 
know who they are. 

630
00:30:16,280 --> 00:30:17,960
Right. 
So that's safety getting to 

631
00:30:17,960 --> 00:30:20,480
really know who they are and and
actually who they are. 

632
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:22,600
Right. 
All right, Jamie, take care. 

633
00:30:22,600 --> 00:30:24,040
You have a good night. 
Thank you. 

634
00:30:24,120 --> 00:30:25,320
You too. 
Hey. 

635
00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:26,720
Good. 
It was great talking to you. 

636
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:26,920
OK. 
Bye. 

637
00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:27,960
OK. 
Yeah, sounds good. 

638
00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:28,240
Bye.
