Romancing the Dungeon is a soft core DND podcast about heroes
navigating their daily lives while looking for love in a
world full of peril, monsters, and heartbreakers.
This show is intended for mature audiences as it contains adult
themes. You know, fun stuff for cool
people. Content warnings for specific
episodes can be found in the episode description.
We'll. Find our way in the game now
we're playing. Sorry, I was fixing my hair.
What what? What what?
What happened? I'd be quite unset.
Please quiet everybody. Episode recap Ross Grapers take
one devoted desired dreamier dirty dapper dates.
Dapper. Dapper.
No. OK, no.
Can we Can we? Can we take 5?
Can I just take like 5 minutes, please?
I cut. OK, Seriously.
Cut. It's absolutely cockamamie
script that you've landed. In front of me?
Like whose? Idea was it to do multiple
narratives this season I mean he is in the present and we're
going back to the past couple of days prior to the guys in the
catacombs and now they're going up a mountain, but she's already
on the mountain. She's practically in the
mountain. I I I like.
Oh, OK. Paycheck at the end, Rose.
Oh, these chicken chick gigs I
have to do. No, I'm good.
I got it. OK.
Me, me, me, me, me, me, me. DDDDD.
Yeah, I got it. OK, Roll.
Are you lovely, miserable, or just plain horny?
When you've taken the first steps to solving your problems,
at least you're dating once. Welcome to D8 devoted desired
dream, your dirty dapper dates for dejected daters.
My name is Roz Grapers, founder, CEO and love wizard.
This is far more important. Hello, yes this is Roz Grapers.
What? I like to discuss upgrading my
sending stone plan. I mean, yeah, I have a few
minutes to spare. I'm not doing anything
important. Why?
No, don't. Please don't worry about it.
I have all the time in the world.
How are you doing? Oh, I see.
I see. Oh, hang on a second.
I've people in front of me. Look, this could take a while.
It's very important. Just keep filling in the
paperwork. Who would you like to swap
places with if you could? And why them?
I think of everyone that I know right now I'd like to swap
places with my old teacher Aster, because he's got a lot
more answers than I do. Oh no, not you, sorry.
Wow, 20% off my first bill. Not because you know I really
care or anything, but like you know, I saw places with sech Med
or something because being dead is way easier than dealing with
this shit so. I'm so sorry.
I'm, I'm, I'm so sorry. Could you shut up?
I didn't get any of that last part.
Jesus, Sylvester. I suppose I'd swap with Ivan
because he's just kind of creeping around at the back of
my brain. It's kind of unsettling knowing
that he's there. And he's Ivan in the room with
you now. Yeah.
Oh, hello, Ivan. That's lovely to meet you.
Security. I know you're just a sending
stone call center operator, but could you please have someone
come to my house? There's a lunatic.
You, Ross, you get to talk to so many interesting people and you
get to make friends with everyone and you ask such
interesting questions like you're always doing something
exciting. Look, I fixed it, OK?
Look AJ. Phea 2.
Phea 2 AJ and you say unlimited data.
Oh my God, they're still here. And like the block list
function, that's unlimited, right?
As the four of you clamber out of the passageway, leaving the
dark, dank, dusty catacombs behind you, Temperance having
escaped Macgucket, Ike, Jess, and the other survivors.
Rebels, allies, secreted away without any idea as to where
they have been taken. AJ.
Your eyes dart around the landscape and it is just this
Crest of a hill blanketed by sheer white snow.
Behind you to the South, all of you can see the rooftops of the
buildings in Gale Char City. On the the Cliff top hill you
can see Palace. You can see plumes of smoke
building up into the late afternoon sky.
There are lower and and farther down the hill you do see the
tops of trees between you and the city.
And to the north, in front of you, you can just see the jagged
peaks and crests of the Dragon's back mountains.
All of you can hear the voracious thundering of the
Dragon's tear waterfall booming around you.
It is bitingly cold. And Hephaesta and Cloda.
It's in that moment that you realize you've escaped kind of
in the defensive smock that you've been changed.
And after you had survived the the fall, the cold whips and
stings. Ah, everybody, what are you all
doing? I, I sell my bag of stuff with
me, but I think I'm going to put it over what I was wearing at
least just a little bit extra. Like a fest is definitely not
used to the cold. So if you just look over her,
she's like stuffing loose linen pajama legs into her, like tight
pants and just trying to like, jam it all in there.
AJ will take a step towards the mittens, breathe in deeply and
just sigh with the satisfied kind of contentedness in the
space and turn and you can tell he's like yammering away.
But with the waterfall there, it's the they're picking up
nothing. He's just like, he's like super
excited to be out. It's the first time in a while
you might see AJ acting like his quote UN quote normal self and
he licks his finger and puts it to the wind and you wouldn't
hear this but he is saying, ah, we're to the West near
Quinevere's Coppus, right? So there should be an easy path
to get supplies. And it's subtitled for anyone
else. Subtitles.
Nate's going to look at AJ with a silent look of judgment and
disgust. So this again, once of this
again. Give me a nature check.
Nature check. You got it. 15 on the dice.
I don't know if my nature's all that good.
It's all right. Plus 3/18.
It's that thing, AJ, as you kind of you lick your finger and you
kind of hold up, you're like, oh, you're checking for the wind
direction and, and, and what wow, it freezes like the spit in
your finger freezes and you're like, Oh yeah, that happens here
all the time. Your eyes kind of as you are
looking around and you do kind of to the West, you can kind of
the, the trade line would tell you, yeah, uh, it's going over
his coppice, the kind of the woods that kind of are to the
north of the city and close to the kind of the suburb town
mount as you're kind of addressing the others and you're
like, you can kind of see like Hephesta is just stuffing her,
her Leathers on and like looks real pissed like.
Pretty irritated, yeah. Nate is just looking at you kind
of like, and it's that thing like he's scratching his
eyeball, but he's giving you the finger.
Chloe, on the other hand, just seems completely dazed, like
it's just sort of doesn't, there doesn't seem to be any kind of
expression. And as you kind of turn back to
kind of gesture to the majesty that are this, that is this
mountain range and all of the nooks and crannies and, and
valleys and cliffs, as well as all the kind of the like the
lore and the legends that are associated with it.
And, uh. It's placement in the kind of
socio economic, geographic space and all that.
In the distance you do see dark clouds rolling.
What are they rolling for? Initiative for.
The deep with the homies, no. No, don't don't mind anything
then. Three of you 3 of you are
getting disadvantaged for that as that rolled into one
disadvantage into the other into next.
Demand it. I think they're very spooky.
Thank you. Put your fallacy away, right?
Is there anywhere in our immediate vicinity that we could
get like just instant shelter, even if it's just behind some
rocks, where we can hear each other and get out of the because
AJ will just gesture that direction?
I imagine it's a case of you've like, it's that sort of, and
like if you're doing your kind of David Attenborough kind of
walking up the hillside, kind of like gesturing at everything and
nobody is listening at all. As you kind of reach the, the
top of this hill straight down below, you can see kind of a,
again, it's like a thicket of trees.
Uh, and where the wind shear has kind of hacked into this
hillside, you can see kind of a space that you could between the
trees and these kind of like a rocky alcove in the hill that
you could probably gather. It's not perfect, like it's not
a shelter, it's not a cave that you can kind of you're still
exposed, but you're not going to be kind of blasted by the wind
that the way you are now. Now gesture to everyone to step
down into that space and as you kind of get away from the
waterfall in the wind, you hear the tail end of What's cool
about this is it's a natural amphitheater.
So a lot of the time we start our tours here because the rocks
are projecting my voice towards you.
Claude is just kind of going to step off to the side and pull
out her normal clothes and get changed.
Does anyone else have clothes that they need to?
Because I was going to suggest there's plenty of night scout
caches around this place where we can get warmer gear, bed
rolls, kind of stores through the mountain that we just leave.
Basic supplies, food, weapons, maybe a nice bottle or something
if the last person was. That sounds good.
That's a plan. It doesn't even, I'm not even
ask for insight checks from anybody.
It's blatantly obvious that AJ is he's after going to some
place in his mind, like if Ivan's in his mind palace, these
mountains are a JS mind palace made real.
It's that sort of the brain has kind of switched into, Oh yeah,
this place, this is my happy place.
And you can he's very much in kind of an autopilot in his
elements kind of zone. Is that kind of Fair to say?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He loves it here.
He whips him up out of his bag and I think what we're looking
for is probably north in the what I've marked as bootleg,
bootleg trail, which is like a little still pot still place.
I'm not too sure we're over. I'll show it to everyone else.
We're over here by Gwyn's compass, but he's trees.
We're probably up here and we can head this way through.
There's a really nice skiing spot actually just to the north.
You don't eat the blue ones. Actually do eat the blue ones.
Sorry, I can't read my own handwriting.
Were West of the Jolly Goliath jogging group, so that's good.
They're pretty noisy. This is your fault.
And a little bit further on, there's this really amazing
sunrise view if you get up early enough.
So we'll do that on the way to visage some Hot Springs, some
cold springs and just right springs.
Some friends, some not friends yet.
Oh which way? And then which way is to the
northeast? SO and I will share this on our
socials if anyone wants to have a look at AJ's map.
I've done a total of 78 crossings and he takes out a
little pen and marks 79. AJ kind of takes out this map.
It's like something you would see on a tourist information
board or pamphlet, but it's it's all hand drawn.
You can see where things have been scratched out or like no
little notes have been made like either in the footnotes or in
like the brackets after bits and pieces.
It's a lot. And in this moment, kind of as
Koda, you are kind of hunkered down, kind of like trying to
dress in even with the clothes that you've on, even with your
armour, even with kind of the bits and pieces, there's no sort
of defence against the cold there.
It's that thing of like you can still feel the kind of the, the
wind kind of cutting through all of you, your fingertips, edges
of your like your nose, earlobes, everything is starting
to sting. And he's still paddling on like
he's still, he's still bringing you through this, kind of
pointing out this, and we're going to do this.
And there's a sunrise that we apparently you're all going to
be checking out with this. As AJ continues his sort of tour
of the Dragon's back mountains. What's everybody else doing?
Cloda is going to rummage in her bag for a notebook and try and
write down as much of the prophecy as she can remember.
Yep. OK, so you are like, you are
just, it's that thing of kind of still kind of you're near the
group, but you're kind of away. You are kind of, I can haunch
down a little bit Clutter and it's something of like writing
into the a little journal. Yeah.
And it looks like AJ Clutter is taking really detailed notes for
you. Oh, I'll share this around
afterwards. You don't need to take notes
during the tour. Eh, she just kind of waves a
dismissed dismissive hand, Adam. Wow, this strange was rude.
I think if that's just kind of letting him go, but she's trying
to like peek at the map and zone him out and actually try to find
something useful on the map. Give me a history check.
I I guess because it's that thing of like you've seen kind
of maps of Galeshire and stuff like that, like so it's kind of
like, what do you? Mate. 88 yeah, it's like, it's
definitely, it's a map and it's the Dragon's back mountains.
But you none of these things make any sense at all.
Like yeah, an 8 an 8. Excuse you, I marked one frozen
lake as slippy. It's really helpful.
He calls the lake Slippy. Yeah, yeah.
So I at least understand that will be slippy if I if I it's.
Really slippy. It's not certain if the name is,
if the lake is slippy or if it's called Lake.
Slippy Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll take caution either way.
OK, fair enough. Yeah, we won't be heading that
direction. It's too slippy.
It's away from the sunrise that we're going to, eh Nate?
Nate is sort of studying Aja little bit and then he's gonna
approach and he's gonna be like, how you doing, bud?
Is that to me or to? No, that's just you.
Oh yeah, the weird one, Yeah. Yeah, good.
If we pick up the pace, not only will we, you know, heat our
bodies up, start feeling the burn, you know, but we'll get to
this little cash quickly and then.
Yeah, how are you doing? I'm doing all right.
Is this because you know what? I actually do need to say this.
Yeah. Sorry about earlier.
I get really stressed when I'm in, like, enclosed spaces.
And I feel like I was like telling you what to do and like
getting up in your stuff. I feel better now in open air.
So you're right. I should.
I don't really know you and I don't know what you can and
can't do. And I feel like I was very like,
do this, do that, and sort of like action AJ, but I'm not.
And then you, you, you feel you're being different now.
Well, OK, yeah, I would have thought and now I'm being
helpful. Now I'm doing something for you
as opposed to you doing something for for me, No.
No, I mean, I mean, I mean the both situations are fine.
There's no need to apologize. I just looking a little stressy.
You are you, you little little stressy little depressy maybe, I
don't know. But you a little weird my guy.
You know a little. Not a whole lot of eye contact
going on. Well, I mean, have you seen
these views? You can look this way and it's
amazing. And then you can look this way
and it's amazing and you can look up pretty cool.
Look down valleys. Well, yeah, let's let's just
keep soldering on, but you need to talk or anything now, I
suppose. Like listen.
I am genuinely, I really appreciate that I'm it's tough
and it seems like things aren't great on a like on a global
scale, but I mean, look around, we've got each other.
We made it out alive for the first time in a long time.
Our next like 2-3 hours look OK and then we'll just see what
happens after that. Do you need to talk?
I'm. I'm I'm good.
Yeah, I'm good. We'll loosen you up later with
some delicious alcohol and booze and yeah.
That's not helping. Yeah, the men are talking, but
I'm saying anything as you kind of survey the space.
Yeah, it's wonderful. It's mountains and snow.
In fact, it's just fucking snow everywhere.
And as you kind of look around, yeah, you can see some trees.
And up ahead you do see, like it's just, it's just wildlands
just completely and totally blanketed in snow and frost and
ice and great. We've just rudged to that.
I guess when you kind of turn back to kind of look up over the
hill, you do see Clodagh low and kind of back turns everybody and
just kind of like half muttering to herself writing into a coffee
book. I'm going to approach her, but
like as I do, can I kind of try to like heat, like the ground,
like I would like creep up next to her incident to be like hey,
and then like touch the ground, try to like warm things up a
little bit, melt some snow for us.
This is how a Festus friendly. She's like, hot.
Hot. Dangerous.
You like me now, right? You'll tell me all your secrets.
Yeah, it's the Koda. It's you do, you can.
You can hear footsteps kind of going a little closer to you.
And then you can kind of feel the warmth.
And just out of the corner of your eye, you can see kind of a
festa kind of behind you kind of now kind of maybe dropping to
our level a little bit like kind of like.
Dropping down to see if she. Yeah, just like slowly kind of
sitting at maybe even across so that it's not too like invasive.
OK, yes, it's kind of coming around.
Yeah, yeah. And the fest is now kind of on
the other side of you, kind of like dropped down as well, kind
of looking at you. I'm sorry, I'm just.
I just. I need to get this out while I
still remember. Well, you remember what?
Right here. Do you think you think the
forsaken air means Ivan? She taps, taps the page and
shows you like this thing that she's writing.
The The Who, the what? I, it was Kappa.
He, he, he gave me this, he just, it's so much.
I don't know where to start. Can I, can I like, roll a
history check to see how much Professor actually paid
attention to like anything about the old gods?
Like does she actually have any idea, or would this be such a
popular name that there's no way she could miss it?
Like in terms of like. Who Kappa is?
Oh, no, yeah. Old gods, that kind of stuff.
Yeah, give me a history check. Yeah, I like she would not be
paying attention, No 13. It's, I think Kappa.
Kappa. Where have I heard the name
Kappa? And you're like, oh, hello,
Cortana. Asmodian Kappa worth of the name
Kappa. It's something in there.
Oh, God, AJ. And he brought you on a tour of
Kappa's Anvil. He was one of the Gale Shire,
like the four heroes like that, but not the four heroes.
He was like, he was the turtle who kind of made equipment.
And he's kind of a famous kind of like weaponsmith.
Part of like the the story, but not just one of them.
Not one of the main four. Yeah, OK.
Uh, what? What do you mean Kappa?
He's like really dead right? Like what's?
Oh no, I just spoke to him. She kind of leans over and puts
a hand on on Clodis forehead. Just be like, yeah, right over
there. She swats it away and she's
like, I'm fine, can you just let me finish this?
OK. I mean, if anybody knows
anything about Kappa, it's probably AJ, right?
Do you want me to go get him? Yeah.
Sure. She just kind of scuttles away
without saying anything back over to the guys.
What's up? Clodagh appears unwell, she met
Kappa and he told her something and now she's writing down some
crazy shit and I barely even know who that guy is, so maybe
you can help. Several emotions cross ages
face. Jealous.
Try to hide his like son of a bitch.
You can hear Nate rolling his eyes.
What the fuck the Kappa? What the Kappa with you?
AJ sprints towards Clara. The pastor just told me you you
met Kappa. You met Kappa.
What was he like? Old.
And. He said a lot of things and I'm
trying to. What did he tell you?
She just finishes scribbling and thrusts the journal.
At AJ, that's why priority tickets should be given to true
fans. AJ can read We are.
Roll for ability to read. Yeah, he doesn't look at it at
all. He's like.
What? It's some kind of prophecy, but
I don't know. There's something about the
Grove in it, and I think the shards are mentioned and I'm
sure we're all in there somewhere.
He, he called me. He called me the Whispered Song.
That is so cool. What was he?
Nice I guess. Was he strong?
No. Oh, was he wise.
Very, but so cryptic. When did you meet Kappa?
When Bobo called me back. The look of betrayal on ages.
Yeah, that's why I stayed behind.
Nate, Nate, I need to talk to you.
Yeah, good, because I really need a cup of booze right now.
Yeah. What's up, bud?
I might need time to process this first, But Mcclouda met
Kappa and Kappa told Kloda some things that I guess are
important enough to tell Kloda. And maybe we'll just get to, OK,
change of plan potentially. There's the cash, but there's
also a hidden distillery that I know of.
And probably good that we go there because other night scouts
wouldn't know about it. So there'd be a lot of booze and
a lot of safety and a lot of space.
It's called the Dragon's Back Distillery, which as a hit,
yeah. I mean, I'm not going to judge
them for it. It's.
Actually called the Dragon's Breath distillery, but whatever.
AJ can't read Leah Michelle of The Grid.
Someone. Draw that, please.
Somebody draw it. Just leave Michelle.
Don't tell me how to read. So for cool what a change of
plan. It's pretty close by ish like
you know, AJ standards I. Mean it's it's more or less
inside like it's it's a shelter of sorts or.
Yeah, it's like it's built into the mountains.
They've got loads of like pot stills and they make like pretty
strong stuff. I think that's why they're
secret. It might be he's going to just
check there's no narcs on this group.
Illegal. Well.
Have you, have you met me? Yes.
Do do you really think illegal bothers me?
I thought you might have. I might have roped off on you.
No, thank you. You wish.
Not right now. Let's go drink first.
Yeah, Look, I think I, I can't believe I'm saying this, but
booze aside, I think we need to get inside somewhere and
regroup. OK, but are you OK?
Can I have my journal back? Oh yeah, it just tosses it at
her. Let's go get Cloda something
nice because she's super sad, OK?
We'll lead the way. Oh, OK, I mean, sorry, diplomacy
and democracy I guess aren't a thing anymore.
Jump away. What are you doing?
Heading towards Dragon's Breath. OK, so.
The secret? The very aptly named Distillery.
Yeah, Dragon's breath. Yeah, distillery, but James
Deadstone, my best friend to remember.
His voice so but but you want to get Koda something nice on the
way. No, no, we'll get it out the.
No, no, we're not getting. Her yeah, I just she.
Can have a liqueur. Just a gift shop at the.
Just get there. Yeah, post prices are extortion
you're better off to get it on this will be fun then with no
real so you I'm just checking you're going straight towards
you're bringing them up bootleggers trail towards the.
Do we pass a cash on the way? No, not if not, if not, if
you're taking them the direct route.
So there is that. We can go off here to get some
supplies or we can head straight for Bootleggers Trail.
I think and I'll run it by the grade.
I'll give you this. Yeah, right.
So just before you, you'd know, having kind of surveyed the
mountains and stuff like that and done bootleggers trail.
It isn't widely patrolled, so there are less guards, but it is
a more treacherous trail. It's why it was used by
bootleggers. It was that thing of like,
there's going to be less guards, but you run the risk of
avalanches, wild monsters, Visagian spies, those bits and
pieces. So death was a free booze, or
better booze dying. I was gonna suggest I might run
it by the group so this doesn't take us by the cash, but I
thought I could drop you guys to the salary.
Pop out, grab some things, come back when you're around or too
deep. Is it safe for you to go out on
your own? Oh yeah, I'm always by myself.
But but you weren't a known fugitive before.
I don't think anyone. Oh yeah.
I can come with you. Yeah, yeah.
I mean the other option is just like point you to the direction
of it. No, no.
I look at Cloud and see how desperate for a drop she is
right now. She's gasping.
Bernie. Sorry, sorry.
She's cast. Yeah, no, she's like her nose is
stuck in her journal again. Well, maybe I'll get some
supplies and then we can decide on the distillery tour later.
I don't know if they'll do a tour.
You're actually meant to ride ahead, so.
AJ focus. We need to get safe.
Yeah. We need to be warm.
We need to be not caught. OK?
You know this area? Yes.
How do we do those things? Warm and not caught are the bits
that are contradictory at the moment because the supplies and
the cash bring us close to where other nights gets would be.
So if we can sneak in I'll go to like.
There's probably some they'd haven't used in a while like the
lesser known ones. I guess Not caught also means
skipping the distillery tour give.
Me a wisdom savings or AJ. No, Wisdom isn't high.
Oh, it's all right, +2 15. It's that sort of, you're not
kind of fully in it, uh, in that moment.
And like you like, there's a plan and now there's another
plan and now there's a couple of plans and none of the plans are
kind of actually. And then you say it, there's a
couple of potential caches that they may not have gone to.
And then you remember how you found the Dragon's breath
distillery. It wasn't intentional.
It was an accident for scouts who've been out longer than kind
of the mission sort of would have required that there are
some non sanctioned caches where, you know, the cool scouts
would know of, uh, kind of other ones that may be around.
You happened upon one of these caches called the Drunken Oak
and that's while you were there, That's how you found markers
that were for bootleggers indicating what way to get to
the distillery. You could bring them to that
cache and from there move on. So it's, it is, it's still kind
of you have to cross some of the, the kind of the open
trails, but it is a kind of a hidden away cache.
The fest. So you're a genius.
Yes. There's a cache kind of near ish
on the way that they don't go to because it's not official.
It's great. Illegal.
We love that here, yeah. Yeah, me too, because I'm a
known fugitive. Oh God.
We're all in trouble. To the Drunken Oak, I'm sorry to
the drunken, We shouldn't be loud.
Actually, I was too excited. Yeah, If we could rein that in a
little bit, we could just go, OK, lead, lead the way, go on.
OK, so I'm going to need everybody to make stealth
checks, a kind of a a group wide check to determine how kind of
sneaky and what we're doing. AJ, you're making this at
advantage. Everybody else flat normal role
disadvantage. Disadvantage as well, yeah.
And then along the way, what else is your character doing?
What else are you doing in this moment?
What? Is.
This stealth check. This is romancing the dungeon.
You're in Jackson's house. Does someone with a fathead have
+3 to? Oh I was like fuck you.
Anyone with a fathead can have a podcast.
Because you look like trees. I got 22.
Sticks your head in this ground. I should just no no, now I'm a
tree. Nate looks 1 jealously. 17 for
me. 11. Stay the line. 8.
With two successes and two fails, it actually takes a bit
longer. AJ as you are kind of you see
Cloda all right, It's that she's not doing anything other than
kind of knows in a book and just kind of following behind for
Nate and Avesta. It is the this is boring.
This is so boring. You're not allowed talk.
You've to kind of like mask your footsteps.
It's dragging the hole out of itself and AJ it is that thing
of everyone again. You have to turn back as they've
forgotten to like try and like cover the trail or.
I'm just picturing like Nate with like a twig off a tree
behind a festa, just like every now and then just giving her a
little like stop stop stop. It's like kids in the back seat
car. With their hit nature, with
their I'm not touching. You.
Yeah, it's like we just survived a near death experience and umm,
yeah. So it's taking a little longer
on the way. Is anybody like, are you are
your characters? Well, if AJ is focusing very
heavily on like the stealth and cleaning up the trail, Koda nose
in a book. So Hafesta and Nate, like, is
that thing of like, what are you doing to kind of make the time
pass because all you're doing is walking and you're not allowed
to talk? I'm kicking the back of a
festa's heels I hate. This one give me.
Fire set him on fire. Give me an athletics check.
Festa Life. Disadvantage or.
It is like he keeps Nate keeps kind of like just stepping on
the back of your heel and like at first it's like you're just
and you're like you're kind of doing your best as much to kind
of ignore him. And then you kind of go to turn
around and Nate, you just it was the perfect moment.
Cut the back of the heel and you fall right forward.
You get slapped in the face by a low hanging branch and like, it
is that pine needle slap. Like there's like and like,
yeah, and like it's on your face.
And then you fall in the snow and you've kind of grazed your
hands and you're cold and you're wet and your face is sticky and
sore and you can just hear kind of a smothered like chuckle out
of Nate behind you. She.
Kind of takes a minute, and she takes a breath and she stands
up. And as she stands up really
slowly, you can see, like, flames starting to appear in her
hands. And she turns around.
She's like, I can do this quietly.
Yeah, No, she does. She blasts them.
The last time this happened. So it's a 10 to hit, which I
don't think does. No it doesn't.
Funnily enough, no no, I will class of 20.
OK, yeah. Umm, like it is.
I think if I say you turn around and it's like AJ and Kloda have
kind of come past, you're doing everything you can to possibly
not scream at him. And as the the rage just wells
up, I need you to give me a role on your swirling emotions table
as well, please. 3 doesn't matter and Eldridge energy just
kind of forms at your hand and you like like you were hurling a
snowball. You fling it at Nate, he's like
less than 5 feet from you. It goes wide and you actually
see it hit kind of a mound behind you that you've been kind
of circling around. And then there is just this
crack and just a torrent of snow just as comes rolling down this
hill, burying kind of small cops of trees kind of further off
that you had kind of come around through it.
Just it sounds like Rolling Thunder and AJ and Koda.
You clearly hear and you turn back to see.
I'm just running out you. Go, go, go, go, go, go, go, go.
Go. I'm also running, but I'm also
kind of giggling to myself. Is Koda running?
Not really. Take me she's.
Just sweet snowing. She's just.
Kind of watches them run past her, then stares at the hill and
then it's like rolls her eyes and then takes off.
Yeah, at the moment Clara takes off.
AJ will keep running behind them, trying to what's the
expression? Herd cats.
Yeah, umm, with the speed that you're kind of running at now,
it's that well, the avalanche will have kind of buried some of
the other tracks behind you. So umm, but also potentially has
alerted umm people to what the hell was that?
It does. It's that thing of running at
the pace that you're at. You are looking.
I mean, it's, it's called the Drunken Oak and it's called that
because so happens that it is a very old oak tree that during a
storm kind of got slightly uprooted.
So when it continued to grow, it kind of has one of its branches
looks like it's leaning on a Cliff face because it's holding
itself steady. And there under those exposed
kind of narrowed roots is sort of a a spot to kind of camp with
a little bit of shelter. There is a very, very worn
borough where the ground has been made flat and a little a
space that you like one person could shelter under.
You have kind of circled around the yet another hill here and
you do you see AJ you you've you've happened to find the
space and you know that it's that particular branch.
It looks like it's been struck by lightning.
But as you kind of like it's a thing about making sure we're at
the right spot because how many of these trees could there
possibly be? But the branch that looks like
it's been burned by lightning has actually it's been scorched
and there is kind of there in the the burning etching you do
see kind of it's like a Dragon's head that's meant to be like a
little arrow kind of this way. Give me an investigation check
as you all like if if you're just kind of waiting for AJ to
get stuff or is anybody else doing out here at the cash?
Yeah, I think if has to agree it around.
OK, investigation check. Doesn't know what she's looking
for, but. 3. Look off 3. 14 OK everyone here
can do something I. Don't think Kodo would.
No, Kodo's busy, OK? Just holding himself like Laura
Saint Claire going. There's a reason, AJ, you're
slightly distracted as you are. Love a good lane, that's where.
I got those moves I. Remember.
That was so cool. Drunken, OK, like you are, you
kind of look around and you see kind of festers immediately
under the roots. Kind of like, just give me that
stuff, Give me that cash. You said cash.
She's hurt money. There's treasure here.
True story when I saw loose on a character sheet I thought it
meant loose ello I was like oh wow when I built the character I
get loose. I was an idiot when I was a kid,
I'm an idiot now. I just.
Kind of say when you were a. Kid So with with kind of Nate
kind of like it's almost, I think it was like leaning in
like, oh, it's cold. It's chilly.
Choda is 10 miles away in her own head.
AJ there's you notice something a little higher up the tree.
There's something, something kind of catches your eye and you
can see it looks like an Arrowhead stuck with a 14.
Yeah, there is, there's a couple of things that you notice here
about this, uh, kind of little kind of hideaway.
There is a small like in like as you get in under the roots and
it does it like a vessel looks like a badger burrowing down
into it. Like it's that like there's
nothing graceful about it. It's just, I mean, there,
there's actually a little bit of residual warmth there.
You can see where the ground is slightly charred and there are
little sort of coals or blackened bits of timber that
have a little bit of heat. Like not enough that like
anybody could get any real, but like seems to have been a person
here before. Fresh enough?
And they're sort of set in under like a flat stone that might be
kind of used as a rest. You can kind of see where there
is a lip. And lifting that up, you do see
that there is a small little cache of goods.
Where's the money? It's got to be so good.
What is this trash? So magical ions.
Cloaks, food, who cares? As you kind of lift that, that
flat stone, you do see kind of there is a hole, there's two
cloaks, there is a pair of mountain boots.
There is a knapsack filled with dried meat and pickled veg.
There's two kind of, there's a little bag of what looks like
it's still marbles and there's a faint home of magic off of it.
And then you do see a small little wooden box, uh, that's
kind of warm to the touch, faint kind of warmth to it where you
would expect because everything else is kind of cold because
it's here stuck in the earth. And there's, there's just a jar
of grease for waterproofing stuff.
Are you? But I don't know, it's a lonely
cash. Throwing in a doorway.
Oh, wow. OK, Too fucking soon.
Yeah. So you have you have found some
supplies? Yeah.
Can I take it all? Oh, OK.
There's really a sign that says take a little, leave a little I.
Was going to say who's in charge of replenishing this?
Yeah, like how do they know when it's empty?
Well, it's not meant to be. Look, it's a secret one anyway.
It's meant to be used early. They'll be fine.
There is no pooch, there's no booze.
That's fine. We're going to distillery.
We'll get it in a minute. Can I climb the tree to see what
the? Athletics check is.
Yeah, no props, I say. What's everybody else doing?
Motoring. Nate's looking over a Faster's
shoulder at the stuff. There she go.
You. Want the goods?
Yeah. Bit cold in that armor.
Yeah. I think she does just kind of
pop her head up and do like a I've got this, I've got that,
who wants this? Let's go, let's come on, let's
get moving. Yeah, you can hear like AJ, as
you're kind of like what you got in your Athletics 15, OK, Yeah,
as you. As you're not falling out of the
tree. As you kind of start to climb
the tree, you hear a festa like she's found the cash and she's
been listing up the supplies and stuff like that.
You're kind of weaving between the branches as she's giving it
the goods kind of to everybody. And there is a really ornate
Arrowhead just fixed there. You recognize them.
They belong to like that. These arrowheads are ridges.
These are his. Oh, secrets.
All right, take it. Nice smile to myself.
This is playing DND, baby. I'll make my way down the tree.
I'll put that in my pocket for now.
Or use it as a brooch. That's cute.
Yeah. Like just pin my pin into my
jacket. I see FS are taking everything
out-of-the-box. And if I'm right, if I'm wrong,
let me know. I have Temperance as Mace.
Yes. And as a training sword.
So I'm going to put the training sword back in the box because
I'm sorry, but that can be the next person's a sword.
Shit. But let's take a little.
Limit. Sword A wooden sword.
That's where I know this tree from.
Yeah, I'll put it in and I don't know if I have.
Hold on. Let me see what else I can leave
in this box. Is anybody else leaving Anything
else? No, as you see, as you see AG
like taking some of his stuff and kind of putting it in.
The only other thing I can leave is a potion of healing and
they're not getting that. You are, you know, I'll be
listening back to this. I just remembered I don't have
the cup. Right.
Yeah, you don't. So we've magic marbles and a
warm box. Those are the interesting things
in there. So yeah.
There are angry. Angry and cloaks and some food.
There was a lot. Oh yeah, I mean, like the cloaks
of food, Like that's normal stuff.
But then there's these magic marbles.
Yes, and a box. That's kind.
Of strangely warm box. Yeah.
And a jar of grease. Yeah, OK, I give the grease
tonight. Nice.
And maybe a cloak. That's it.
Can I look in the box? Yeah.
In the box.
There's just four small flat black stones and the heat seems
to be emanating from those. Oh.
OK, a fess is going to assume those are hand warmers and just
hand them out. Stay toasty.
Yeah, as you are kind of passing the round, Yeah, you recognize
the major as hot rocks. Yeah, for cooking stuff, I
presume you put them in the water and then it like an old
full of feel. Stay toasty, yeah?
Whatever that was, stay toasty. That's George Foreman's lean
toast and rock machine. You just put two slices of
breads and cheese between the two hot rocks, wait half a
fucking hour and somehow the cheese is still volcanic.
I think I pocket the marbles OK, and then the other coat boots,
whoever wants them. I think she's all right.
She's got big boots anyway, naturally warm.
Yeah, you don't wear. I look to cloud.
A cloud has no shoes on. Whoops.
Umm. Freak stare.
I don't think I need to swap out my boots.
Do you need new boots? Do you have boots?
He's. Going to take the boots anyway.
Stranding they're they're there if I need.
That's my fashion boots. So there's not as much as I
thought in the box, but this should at least keep us warm for
now and we can make our way to the Dragon's breath.
The good thing about this is that even if we do cross paths
with anyone, they're less likely to report us to authorities
because it's like when you catch someone else in trouble, it's
like, ah, mutual destruction. And I'm almost certain what
we're guilty of using a slightly illegal trail is pretty high up
there on things you shouldn't do either.
So. We're also guilty of many other
things. Also, we're sorry I keep
forgetting we're not guilty. I just.
I mean, correct. Yeah, but no one's going to
believe us, Yes. So maybe pull up the heads on
those cloaks and let's be quieter than the avalanche that
Nate created. What?
Is there any way we can disguise ourselves or pretend to be?
We could pretend to be Visagian spies or.
OK. So hang on, hang on.
OK, what's going back? Who's putting what in back into
the cache? Just me, I think.
So you put a sword, you took the boots and the cloak.
Yes, everyone's got a warm rock. Not rack.
I mean, they're called hot rocks, but OK, everyone's got a.
Warm rock. Room temperature rock.
It's warm. I went to the Dragon Spec
mountain and all like that Was this stupid rock.
Luke's warm rocks like googly eyes.
Make them be like people. Minds blinking at me that's just
melting. Declare to take a cloak or
anything. No, she's got all.
She's just going to power through.
Then we leave a cloak behind. I took all the food for sure and
I have a magic bag of marbles. You want me to read this thing?
Yeah. I was going to read it on our
way to the Dragon's Breath. I can.
I can start reading. Yeah, read it now.
Read. It right now.
It's a trap. You are doomed.
It's a. Heller I'll read it out loud,
but it doesn't necessarily for the audience.
It doesn't necessarily mean the party hear this.
Actually knowing AJ, just read it out loud.
Following AJ, if you got this note, I am long gone with Una.
With the time that has passed in the cell, I have come to realize
a truth. You were an infatuation.
Infatuation. Infatuation.
You were a distraction. I am so sorry.
I feel the truth is most important now.
Look after her. Festa and Nate.
Goodbye, Thea. I don't know what that means.
OK. Sophia's being here.
Which is good news, because it means we're on the right trail.
Does he is he actually like this?
Fucking stupid. OK, first time I if if he lets
her very gently take it. There you go.
Would she recognize Fia's handwriting?
You recognize the Arrowhead? Yeah, you were slipped similar.
By FIA as well, yeah. Can I like inside it?
Like, would FIA say this? Would she write this way?
Is this the way she speaks? Like that kind of thing.
Yeah, give me an inside check. Yeah.
Take the first letter of every word and I bet it spells that.
I love you, AJ. 16. The note you got from Thea was
short and succinct. This has a coldness to it and.
The one from her was like same but opposite wasn't it like.
Yeah, it was kind. Of protected.
Yeah, that kind of thing, but it.
Just doesn't feel right it. Doesn't, but you don't know what
about it doesn't necessarily feel right.
It it, I mean, it looks like Thea's handwriting.
And AJ is convinced that she's been here.
Well, yeah, she left us a note. This is great news.
I don't. I don't know if that's fear.
Oh, I yeah, the actual message, I don't think so.
But she I mean, it says it's signed fear.
So you think maybe she didn't write the message, but she did
sign it? I think maybe she was like
forced to write this, but like, yeah, maybe not.
There's not even like a heart over the eye.
But if she's not this direction, then what other?
What? No, we'll have to.
We'll have to take it as maybe a clue, but I think we just have
to proceed cautiously. If we find someone with like
magical abilities and this is Vias, we have something of hers
to like, help trying. Yeah, I'll keep it close.
Yeah, I took it in in my breast bucket.
And you're not concerned about the contents of the, you're just
you're happy. Oh, the bit about you were an
infatuation, you were a distraction.
Yeah, I'm so sorry. Yeah, I feel the truth is
important. You all good?
Umm, I mean, it's all true. I was.
She's infatuated with me and I am very distracting.
I don't know what she's sorry about though.
That's the. No, that's fair.
Yeah, It's, it's, it's a bit weird, Yeah.
I'm sure I can just talk to her about it.
Yeah. Because I'm infatuated with her,
yes. It's.
Just very distracting. Tuck that away, yeah.
A factorization sometimes leads to love, so.
Yep, can do. Yeah, Yep.
Claude and Nick, what are you doing?
Oh, look, there's a little heart on it, and there is actually a
tiny little heart in the back. It's half, but it's it's shaded
half and half. That's probably us.
Yeah. So look, secret signs.
Yeah. Secret signs, people.
Yep. There's fear.
I think you need to have a lie down.
Percent drink. We're going to get a drink.
Yeah, let's make our way to the Dragon's breath.
Just to make and kind of what are you doing while that's
happening? Like, what are you there's?
Who's putting the stuff back in the cache?
Who's Yeah, well, I thought, I thought if I said put the stuff
back in after handing out. Well, I put back anything that
wasn't taken, but if you guys are going to leave anything else
behind. Oh no, no, I'm not leaving
anything in the cache. I don't give things away.
Except the clap. Well, first of all, again, I
have to remind everybody that as a paladin, I don't have any
diseases anymore. OK, so once, once I ever came
into me, there's no yeah, I'm clapless.
Must be in charges for it so. All clapped out.
Claude is sighing heavily. Yeah, she's just kind of
watching the disdain with disdain.
AJ just completely ignore the message of the arrow.
Nate has heard Clodess sigh many times before that sort of gives
her a bit of an awkward look and then tries to put his hands into
his pockets and then only in the attempt realizes he doesn't have
any pockets so he just sort of does 1 swift rub of his thighs.
Doesn't really say anything, because if history is anything
to go by, any attempts to console Cloda have failed.
She doesn't remember any of those attempts.
Yeah, she's just gonna kind of wander in the direction they're
supposed to be going. Kind of with the kind of the
supplies taking your got, you're happy to set off.
Oh God, like we stay here forever.
No, umm, no backtracking as the four of you with kind of new
supplies and a a message from Via umm kind of safely tucked
away inside your sharp pocket. AJ leading Hafesta, Ivan and
Cloda away from the Drunken oak along the path.
Your next marker is the bastard flask, a rock that happens to
look like a small hip flask. All these little markers along
the route and as the drunken oak disappears around a corner and
we bring this episode to a close, there is a crumbling of a
small coal in that fire pit under the drunken hook.
Just a whiff of smoke kind of just evaporates into the air,
carried on a cold wind. And there charge and half a
second Arrowhead and we leave the episode there.
You're listening to Romancing the Dungeon with Amber, Sam,
Ben, Eilish and me, Declan, your dungeon master.
Our theme song Fight for Each Other is by Steve Tynan and Abby
Soiree, and our podcast at work is by Dahi Sea Designs.
We recorded this episode way back in November.
I think you can tell because a couple of us have head goals.
It has been a lot of fun listening back to it.
And I'm going to take the this is a reminder as Adm to put the
clue in front of everybody. Just put the clue right out
there. Don't don't bury it in a fire
pit where they're not going to see it.
So reminder to future Doctor, not any of the episodes recorded
up to this point, but future episodes from May 14 onwards.
Remember, make the clue obvious. If you want to see more from DA
Dungeon, if you want to check out stuff from behind the
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Until then, take care. Bye bye with.
Two sex, two sex with two sex. We don't have time, especially
not for two.