Romancing the Dungeon is a softcore D&D podcast about
heroes navigating their daily lives while looking for love in
a world full of peril, monsters, and heartbreakers.
This show is intended for mature audiences as it contains adult
themes. But like, you can listen to it
with your friends, or you can listen to stuff that's adult
themed with your friends. Do anyway.
Content warning for specific episodes can be found in the
episode description. OK, let me grab my notes last
time on romancing the dungeon. Following Una, she doesn't say
anything. There's a Bank of snow hiding a
frozen body of water where you were a moment ago.
You are pulled away from the ice as you feel it kind of crack
underneath you. You.
Shifted what? Yours is different.
Our abilities as we get older can manifest differently.
And you don't really seem like you want to talk about it.
Because I don't. So let's not.
The darkness. You start to see it take form,
and there is a woman standing in front of you, made entirely of
shadows. I can give you power what you
need. I need to survive.
And survive you shall, my little one.
You see two large black wings just for all.
From behind her a new Raven Queen shall rise.
Devoted desire dreamier dirty. What's what's the point?
You know, the fiery Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Like the family resemblance is just absolutely Hephaesta.
No, never heard of her. Dusk descendants, darkness,
destiny, treasures and mine. What do you think you did to
fear into religious moment? I trusted my family.
The voice rings out. Fear and it's that thing of your
eyes, you, you can see darkness and then there is a kind of
creep of light in as you feel your body awaken.
You can hear the groaning of a cot underneath you, the
heaviness of a couple of blankets draped over you.
And as you toss and turn and shift and your body aches, there
is just this brief moment before you feel the full weight of your
body and the exhaustion that has piled on it, uh, just sort of
wave through you. And as your eyes open and you
kind of adjust to the light, some of the blanket shifts and
your bare skin is sort of exposed to the cold air and you
find yourself in a very, very small room.
There's to your right, uh, there's a small kind of gap
between and you'll see that there's another cot.
There isn't even a mattress on you to the bare lats of the bed.
There's a small little chest, uh, and a kind of cupboard at
the far end. The door is closed and the light
is peering in from a small window overhead.
I feel like with this level of exhaustion that she has as well,
she's like trying to rub her eyes to try and focus, but her
it's, it's almost like there's this haze as well over her
vision a little bit where it's like because she's so tired,
it's just not shifting. She's not waking up as quickly
as she normally would either. So she does kind of just sit up
and it's just really trying to focus her eyes.
So like looking at like the wall far away or looking at the
window just trying to get her eyes to focus on something.
As you, as you are kind of looking around the room and
trying to kind of focus on a couple of different things.
It's just at the end of the cot at the edge of the wall there
you can just make out some very faded colours and it they look
like kind of like flowers that are drawn by kids.
There's like a circle and uh, misshaped kind of petals all
kind of spilled around it and that's what your eyes kind of
focus on. And, and as the sun rises out
and more light kind of pours into the room, there is just
that moment where in the dawn's R rays, the colour is that
little bit brighter. And you can clearly see that
there is just this whole side of the wall that you are next to
has just all these little childlike drawings faded with
kind of the sun and with time as you kind of, as your eyes trace
along it. And there's like, there's
clouds, there's books, there's, uh, trees and kind of like, what
look like animals all kind of like drawn almost like, kind of
like a, like a full mural on this wall.
Your eyes land on 4 little figures and you literally see,
uh, written in uh, sort of very bubbly jagged little letters.
Bubbly jagged doesn't make sense, Uh.
Trying to be bubbly, but it's like, obviously someone's
learned, still learning. Yeah, yeah, it's that sort of
like I'm I'm going to make kind of a bubble, but Nope, that's a
very sharp bubble. You see Quilo una forest me and
like a depiction of the Burbage family and there's a little
caravan next to it there's. This wave of confusion that
comes over via seeing this and she's wondering like, am I
still? Am I still am I still asleep?
And she, she goes to, she rubs her hand on it and feels that
it's there, feels it where it's pressed more into the wall in
some parts and that in the others.
As you touch it like, as you, as you can reach out for it, there
is that moment where it's, it's not, it's not, it's not muscle
memory, but you, it's, you've got to make kind of the, the
movements to draw it. And you just kind of hear kind
of a snort of laughter behind you that doesn't look anything
like me fear. And you like turning back over
your shoulder. You see Quillo probably 8 years
old, very even then quite sharp features.
Quite a tall stance, shoulder back stance he'd always kind of
had. Yeah.
And like, it's that thing of his posture is like it's almost like
too big for his body. Like he seems to be kind of
holding himself taller and everything, but he's kind of
like staring and he's squinting at it.
And he like the entire time he's just got this kind of big sneer
on his face. And he's, his hair has been kind
of pulled over to like you can see it's kind of shaved around
the sides, but there is kind of a long spindly, kind of like rat
tail braid just sort of drooped over his right ear.
He kind of leans into it and he's, oh, what's that?
You just see him kind of reach and he has to go almost smudge
it and then memory fades. It's like she's starting to see
even though it's there, it's it's there.
It's tangible, it's on the wall of the scene.
It's like, is this real? Is it because she's had so many,
so many days now where it's like living in this thing of
questioning her reality and questioning what is real, what
actually happened, what hasn't happened?
It's like no, can't be, but it is.
But it feels so familiar, familiar enough to where she
like she rolls out of the bed the same way I was like, I've
done that before. Have I in this bed, you know,
just these little things that are happening just like, but
that's there. No, just confu.
There's a lot of confusion going on right now for her.
As you, as you roll out of the bed and you kind of find your
feet and you stand up, it is, I think of, oh, the room almost
kind of spins. It's that sort of that wobble.
You kind of trying to get a sense of your bearings again now
kind of standing, uh, and kind of one hand reached out kind of
to the wall opposite to kind of almost balance yourself.
You are much bigger in this room than you were when you first
came here. And that it is that like, like
the cots, their children's cots, you know what I mean?
They're they're not like you were bunched up and.
You see in this room at a different height, yeah.
And as you kind of feel the, the warmth coming in from the sun's
rays, you see out into what looks like the, the yard, uh,
around this, this house, this cabin.
And you just see it's just a field of snow and a, a tree line
beyond. And the trees look like, they
look like shadows just sort of jagging out of the ground and
you can see somewhere in the distance.
Then just the, the, uh, sort of the hazy, uh, mountain, uh,
scape the sky overhead. Uh, it, it's clear like it.
And it's this sort of, umm, burning yellow and very, very
sort of washed out blue, just that it's that crisp morning
sky. And as you get your bearings,
there is a another sense sort of takes notice and there is a
familiar smell of burnt milk wafting on the air.
Kind of being blinded from the sun reflecting off of the snow
and then smelling that like turn to to leave the room and kind of
shake off this, trying to shake off this deja vu feeling.
You reach for the door and as you do, you see Quillo again,
about 8 years old, just kind of run past you.
He's holding like a small doll in his hand and he's kind of
waving it over his head. And then immediately you see
this young shader Kai girl, her hair in like 2, sort of, you
know that I don't know what the Heidi braid loops.
Yeah, like that with like lots of little kind of bows and
feathers and all these kinds of other little bits and pieces
like tied into it. Half laughing, half crying
because. Oh yeah, she's definitely tears
in. Her eyes, yeah.
She doesn't know if this is one of Kilo's games or if this is
Kilo bullying her. And you watch as they spill out
into the hall and that smell, yeah, it's, it's catching.
It's not just a memory, it's actually catching.
And the there is a faint warmth here.
And there is under the smell of the burning milk, there is the
the faint smell of smoke. And you can kind of even this
house, it's own sort of aroma like, and it's kind of a cold,
damp almost lingering there. You watch as the versions of you
and Quillo sort of race down this hallway.
And as you step out of the room into it, you do see sort of an
open area. It's kind of like a a living
area. There's a small little alcove
that you can. You can hear sound coming from
the powering and clattering, but you watch as these two little
kids run, race towards the door, and as they do, it opens and
standing there is Forrest Burbage, your father, and a
bundle of logs under one arm, a small little basket filled with
berries in the other. Seeing this memory of her father
more so than seeing herself and Quilo, Fear really tries to
latch out to that because it's been so long since she saw him,
since so long since he's been in her life.
When she sees that memory there, she's trying to latch on and
remember as much as possible about him.
Give me a Wisdom saving throw. Dice don't fail me now, so 13.
It's that thing you find yourself actually moving towards
the, the image. You know it's Faris because you
remember this and you that memory of the this cabin kind of
comes with, with him. And you watch as kind of Quillo
ducks under his right arm and it kind of almost vanishes behind
Faris's frame. It's it's, it's quite weird
seeing him because it's that thing of you don't remember him
being that big. And even now, as Thea, a grown
woman, Forest is still quite a broad kind of built.
I'd say Thea really sees Quillo's stance in Forest.
There's a big difference in the way Forest holds himself.
Quillo. It may.
It's sort of a. Posturing.
Yes. Whereas for Forrest it is very
much, you know, he's just tall. He's just tall and broad and
big. And he is, he's quite a like
Una, tall, slender with a little, you know, she's got a
little bit of curves here and there.
But you and Quillo are both quite lean, wiry.
I mean, a couple years from now, Little Thea and Little Quiller
are going to go into their awkward, lanky phase.
Quillo grows into it, Phia never quite manages to.
Grasp, grasp. She's she's a giraffe on ice.
Yeah, but you take, you take that from Una, uh, none of you
kind of carry the definitely his height, but not his frame, not
his build. No, I can, I can imagine I'm
having like more like even for an elf, like quite broader
shoulders. Yes, and, and, and Fuller, like
a much fuller figure, like he's and like he, you can see he's
wearing sort of like, uh, very heavy, uh, like a very heavy
dark green cloak. Uh, there's a pile of furs
stuffed underneath it and all that's kind of adding to him.
And you see that his boots, there's snow kind of stuck to
the edge of them. And it is, I think of it as you
kind of race in, you see little Fea kind of race in towards him.
Uh and Quillo disappears behind him.
Varas just gives you, gives her like a nod and kind of a wink
and you see him kind of mouth something and there's just this
cheeky smile on his face as he again, he sidesteps very quickly
and you just see you snatch the doll out of Quillo's hand all in
that sort of moment. And he Forrest his laughter.
You see him kind of shift more towards the that living room
space and the the fireplace and he his laughter fills the room.
I think fear right now. She's smiling broadly,
remembering the warmth that he would bring into the family
because he was now we're remembering him now.
He was the centre, he was the little happiness.
It's where she gets her optimism from and she's seen that in him
now. She's seen the playfulness that
she has in him. Because.
Especially being around Quillo and being around her mother at
her age that she is now she's she only ever sees what she got
from them and it's been so long since she saw her dad she forgot
what she got from him. Thea, Thea you.
And it's that thing of you. You can hear Una's voice and as
you turn, you see her standing in the kitchen and she's just
holding kind of a, a large bowl under her arm and there's like a
mix of like berries and grain in it.
And she's a lot younger than you remember you.
You can kind of see like a smattering of like, I don't know
if it's flour that kind of on her face and kind of some of
it's in her hair. There's like a smear of butter
on her apron and it kind of steps in towards you.
And then she's much older now and she's holding like 2 balls
in her hand. Thea Thea.
And it's actually going to like just jumps kind of snaps her
fingers in in your face. There is just.
That Thea just blinks and as she does, like kind of the warmth of
the colours that you know that that filled from the memory has
just vanished straight away and it just feels grey.
A little bit of the colour like the, the, the cabin doesn't have
that life in it. It is simply for walls and you
can clearly see that like it had this place hasn't been taken
care of though it hasn't been maintained and that damp smell
is a little bit more present now.
Una just kind of moves into the to the living room and she sets
the two balls down on a little kind of, uh, table and she kind
of gestures your, you, you need to eat something.
You, you, you don't look. You don't look well.
This place is bringing back a lot of memories.
I wondered if you and she kind of you just see her kind of like
she talks, you know, for some of the kind of the loose strands of
hair kind of behind her ears a little bit as she kind of looks
around the room. Yeah.
We spent some good times here. It's weird, it's like I feel
like I remember all of it but then I don't remember what
happened after here either. Of well, but this was this was
your father. And I used this as sort of a
base camp at times. You know his work, my work, the
families. Work took us between Visage and
Gale Shire, so and she kind of again, she kind of just gestures
around the room as she takes a spoon of some very, very burnt
looking porridge oats and you see her kind of take a mouthful.
You were very young when we were here.
I it it doesn't surprise me that maybe you don't remember as
much. No, some of it's coming back.
You know, I've not even if I'm not even really looking at it
when I either as we're we're talking, my eyes are are looking
around at every kind of crevice every, you know, like looking at
the table where the corner is chipped where I know Quillo,
like we're throwing stuff at each other and one of us threw a
book and it took a knockout of it and.
Just. Looking at those little things
where it's like the scratches are on the floor and stuff where
we were dragging furniture around and remember like
connecting to those little things.
Sweetheart and she had a gestures at the the bowl.
Oh, Oh yeah. Umm, thanks.
And she starts eating, but she's still looking around.
The food tastes awful, like the, she clearly has burnt the, the,
the milk and it has that sort of that acrid taste to it.
Umm, and you see her, she's, she's taking a couple of bites.
She's obviously not enjoying it either, but she's used to to it.
I think in a weird way for you as well because she remembers it
from before and it's like I, I. I think it's also the
distraction of the space as well.
She's not really noticing the flavour.
It's not hitting your. Yeah, there is there.
It is that the of like you do kind of like as you take kind of
the first bite of it, there is a hole and there is that memory of
like being on the road and. Oh, no breakfast.
Yeah, and Oh no, Una's turn to make breakfast because Dad's
driving and aired the whole family kind of looking around
into this sort of like congealed grey slop and Una just kind of
happily eating into it. And then like, Forest giving you
and color the nod to start eating it as well.
And like he takes a bite and then spews it up and then
everybody just kind of laughing. And then Una being completely
perplexed as to why everybody's laughing.
I think if I may take a little liberty, she's probably also
remembering Forest as well at some point watching him how he
sneakily got rid of half of it. At what other locations?
Yes. And it creative ways he would do
it where he'd catch our eyes so we'd see it and trying to get us
to giggle. Yeah, it was that thing of like,
he's like, hey, Uno, what's that over there?
And she'd turn and he'd like scoop half of it onto the ground
and then you'd see him kind of like dragging his foot to kind
of cover it with some of the dirt and that kind of stuff.
Yeah, there is lots of these different memories and like life
on the road and travelling between again, none of them feel
tangible. Like none of them feel fully
formed, none of them fully. They don't feel like a full
memory. They feel very fuzzy.
Yeah. There's a sadness that kind of
creeps over her now, in a way, thinking about these happy
times. And then she actually looks at
Una and. Are you finished?
Yeah. And she kind of just takes the
ball from you and she goes back into the kitchen.
We've a couple of days here. We obviously have some
provisions that we got from the twizzlebacks, but I think maybe
and she kind of like looks to the pot.
I don't suppose you're up for hunting you?
Sure. Yeah, yeah.
I think if we go out, we go now we can go looking, maybe catch
something with a bit of flavour and she kind of half smiles at
you. See, it doesn't really smile
back. It's kind of like it's, it's not
really fully there. Just going with what Una's
saying, she's not fully as much as she's looking at her, she's
not. She's thinking in the back of
her head. She feels like she has to ask
Una something, but she does not. If you're we're not up for it,
yeah, you can. I'm good to go on my own.
No, I, I I want to get out yourself.
OK. She kind of taking kind of like
1/2 a bucket of water. She kind of like drops the the
bowls into it and she's kind of poured all of it then into the
big pot that needs to soak. We also have probably some
firewood as well, so maybe you take care of the firewood and
I'll find us something palatable.
OK. She kind of just standing there
almost uncertain or unsure of like what to do next or.
Are you going now or? Yeah, I, I, I can, I can, I can
go now. I, I, I'll try to be back by
midday. And she like she pulls on a
couple of layers. You see what she takes kind of
her cloak off from over the the back of a chair and she just,
you see her take her, her blade whisper and a short bow.
And she just heads out the door, kind of looking back over her
shoulder and just again giving you kind of 1/2 a smile and
she's gone. Something about seeing her leave
kind of triggers the question in Via's head that she wanted to
ask and wasn't brave enough to ask of of Una while she was
standing there. And she.
She takes a moment kind of looking around the room again
and remembering it and seeing it another color at the what it was
now. She grabs the posh with the
balls in it. She sets it just beside the fire
to keep the water warm to help loosen up the remnants, and
decides to go out, get well, get covered up and go out and start
trying to get some work together.
Forward OK, give me a nature check. 26.
OK, you like you head out the door maybe maybe 10 minutes
after Una and you can clearly see her tracks like she's she's
just beelined it out the door and she's gone straight towards
the the woods. If as you step out like this
cabin here in this clearing, you are literally in the wilderness.
This is this is as as far away from civilization as FIA has
ever been. I can imagine there's a massive
sense of calm familiarity about it for her as well, in a way.
Where does that come from? It comes from being here before,
like, like she, she's still clinging on to those little
flashes of memory she got inside.
Like she's imagining where the caravan was always parked up at
the one side and where it was parked up there so often there
was divots for where the wagon wheels were.
And then she can imagine then the other side of the cabin
where there would be these like, almost like honeycomb stacks of
wood that her dad would have gathered and covered for keeping
the cabin going while they were there.
I think there's just that comfort coming from the
familiarity of those little things, of remembering where
they were. As those things kind of come
back to you and it's like, Oh yeah, that's where dad kept the
and it was like just sort of there was a part of the roof
sloped and slanted out. And it was a kind of a little
shelter for, for Adam that your dad was storing, including the
firewood just to the rear of the cabin.
And it is that thing as, as you are kind of moving through the,
the yards and you do see where the caravan, it's at the piano.
That's where it was always parked there.
And the horses were kind of kept over here and like all these
kind of memories and it's via and quilo and forests anyway,
all had kind of different ages. And like as you round the, the
rear of the the cabin, you there's again, you see, at first
it is, it's just the mounds of snow, but the memory kind of
comes back and it's like, no, no, it's like it's probably one
of your earliest childhood memories kind of hits you and
it's you and Una making a snowman family.
And like there's Thea and like she just has like 2 small little
buns of snow on top of her head and like she has 2 little twigs
sticking out of them to like be ribbons.
And then there's Una, who's really, really tall.
Well, like in comparison to Little Fear, but she has this
like old rag kind of wrapped around her neck, kind of like a
shawl almost. And she just has these like all
of them have like jet black coal fries.
And then there's Quillo. And Quillo has like jet black
eyes. But then his distinct feature is
he has two twigs over his eyes. They're like make him look
cross. And then there's forests.
And it is just it's just a big fat snowman.
And like he does, he has like this big, big belly on it.
And there's a a moment where Una kind of goes up and she kind of
Pats the tummy and like she says something and you can't quite
hear it, but you see like 4 year old via just laughing, like
giggling to herself. And then Forrest coming around
the corner and he's shouting and Una's laughing.
And then he comes running over to it and he's standing
represented. He makes the same kind of pose
and he pushes out his belly via just again, it's that thing.
She just starts laughing and Una just pelts the forest in the
head with a snowball. As you hear the twack of the
snowball, you just hear snowfall and you turn back and you can
see that there is a few scraps of logs, but they're sitting in
the snow and they're wet and the memory is gone.
I just kind of, I kind of, I kind of dig through the area to
see like I know some of them are wet, but to see if some
underneath are a little bit drier or if there's an axe
maybe. You, you actually, you manage.
It's not that you find any dry logs there.
They aren't like these have been exposed.
You don't know how long they've set out here.
Find a couple of pieces of kindling timber.
All right, that you can. Reuse take.
But you do find a small hand axe.
It is dull, but uh, it's you've kind of pull it from the, the
snow. The hand axe, I know it's kind
of blood, but to see if there's any logs that haven't been split
yet and going to try and split a few of them because I know the
beat dryer on the inside and get some of that.
You. Yeah, you it's it's a task and
1/2. I I'm assuming she has a
whetstone in the stuff that the those whistles back gave her.
I just try and sharpen up the axe a bit to make it a little
bit better for use. As you go to sharpen the edge of
the, the Little Axe, you are beginning.
I mean, you don't know if it's the cold, You don't know if it's
the exertion of like trying because you've been at the,
you've, you've kind of hacked into a couple of logs and
they're not great. Like you've been out for a
little while and you're starting to tend to feel that fatigue
settle in and that ache. Yeah.
Yeah, and it's that thing of now just everything is getting a
little annoying. Like even the like you're,
you've as you're scraping the whetstone against the, the, the
edge of the, the axe head, you feel how numb and solid your
fingers are. And it's that moment where you
kind of you catch your finger against the edge of the blade
and the whetstone and the skin is snagged and you cut your
finger and you just, yeah, it's just everything is shit.
It's like, it's that thing of like, I, I feel like absolute
crap. And here I am out here with a
shitty axe in the cold trying to get firewood.
Yeah, I kind of an anger does spread in her a bit.
It's like, it's like, why me? Why did I get stuck in this
situation? I didn't do anything wrong.
Why is it me? Why I only ever tried to do the
right thing and do the right thing by the people I care
about. As you feel the, the, the kind
of, the, the warm blood trickle down your finger and you kind of
look at your hands. It's not a deep cut.
It's just a kind of a, a sharp scratch, uh, that's drawn a
little blood. You kind of, you see how worn
and cracked the skin on your hands are and the the memory
like the, the coldness that's in them, the memory of being in the
prison and all the weight of that kind of comes back.
And then any amount of effort to do anything at this point just
feels pointless. Pretty much giving up she puts
the axe to one side, she picks up the driest bits of wood that
she could find and then even some that are not quite as dry
to bring them inside to dry them beside the fire and she goes
back into the house. She throws a couple of the
driest ones onto the fire to keep it stoked and like just
completely in a day she goes to lift the posh remembers it's hot
kind of skulls her hands and drops it on the ground in
frustration and. Takes 3 fire damage.
Very fair. It's not to the point that it's
like, you know, molten metal, but it is hot and it burns and
and now it's another thing that's gone wrong and your
immediate reaction is to drop. You kind of half catch it.
Water is sloshed. Some of the fire has gone out.
It's one thing after another and you just feel wrecked shit.
Shit. Shit and kind of start.
She kind of starts pacing in circle and looks around the room
again and then looks over to where I'd imagine.
Now I don't know if this is correct, but I'd imagine the
house. There was a little table for the
four of them to sit around to have food.
But then there was also because of her dad and the work that he
was doing, the result of his work table where it used to be.
I don't know if the table is still there or not, but she
imagines it in the corner beside one of the windows.
There's a, again, it's that thing of like, oh, dad had a,
like a, a workshop table. It's a small bench.
Like it's not this big sort of massive workstation that you
remember. It is a small narrow bench that
he would be kind of stooped over and sorting through bits and
repairing that needed to be repaired.
Yeah, she kind of walks over there and stands by it and like
spreads her hands out and is kind of leaning down on her arms
and just sighing and looking down at the table and just feel
like she is really just really feeling sorry for herself right
now. Just really just over trying to
be the +1 all the time. As you're standing there just
sort of mulling it all over and the tiredness kind of wearing
you down, in the distance, you see Una kind of coming back.
Seeing her when it come back she kind of snaps back to like Oh
no, everything needs to look OK. She goes over the pot I say has
cooled now because it's on the floor for a little bit and tries
to clean it up and brings it into the kitchen to try and
scrub it and is working away on that to make it look like
nothing is going on. Una kind of burls in and OK, I
have and there's just a thud and you see that there is a rather
fat looking, if not small bore, uh, kind of on the bench that
you were standing at a moment ago.
And she just kind of drops it with a kind of a thud.
And she's kind of kicked off like the kind of the snow off of
her boots. And now there's a trail of it
indoors and she's kind of throwing kind of like the layers
off herself. And she goes over to the, oh, I
feel that you. The fire's gone out.
Oh, sorry, sorry. That's OK, I caught and she kind
of gestures over to the the bore.
Seeing it on her dad's table, there's a little sadness seeing
the table like that being used as just somewhere to throw game
kind of creeps over for his face.
I don't know if I'm going to catch that or not.
Is this all you were able to find?
And she kind of picks up a couple of pieces of.
The timber I tried. I'm still wrecked, Mom.
I wasn't giving out via. I just asked I I can go out and
I can get some if if you're tired, go lie down, sweetheart.
Feeling guilty now, she just leaves.
As you kind of you're heading back to kind of the room is that
they're kind of she kind of steps towards you and she kind
of puts a hand on your shoulder, your, your hand, your hands, and
she kind of takes them both just takes some time and she kind of
gestures around the room. I'll take care of everything.
Ifia goes to her room, she doesn't say anything to her mom.
There's there's a lot of questioning going on in her
head. It's like, is her mom being nice
or is this like is there snark or is she just imagining snark?
As you head back to the room and you kind of throw yourself down
into the cotton and pull the blankets up around yourself,
you're a bit of a commotion outside the room as Una kinda
goes to tidy. She's sorting at the fireplace.
As she heads out, you hear the door open and close.
And then sometime later she comes back and she gets she's
humming to herself. And it's that thing of as you
listen to her, the melody is familiar and it's just, it's
just this song she would hum constantly.
And it kind of echoes around the cabin.
You find yourself drifting. And as your eyes grow heavy,
sleep sets in and you can still hear the humming.
And then then there's shouting. And as your eyes kind of dart
open, you see Quillo standing at the door and he kind of looks at
you and he just puts a finger to his mouth and you, he's kind of,
kind of got his ear kind of copped with a hand against it.
And you can hear Forrest's Anuna shouting.
She has to go. He doesn't want her to go.
The kids. She has to start thinking about
the family. This isn't about her.
She signed up for this. You're not a part time job.
You're not a part time thing that she can just drop in and
out of. And you just hear Una back,
back. I'm doing this for us.
You know why? And then there's just a knocking
on the door. Yeah, it's just an answer.
Yeah, it's, it's a little bit late if you're awake.
I've made, oh, I've tried to make a Stew.
I'll leave some good night. And you just hear her footsteps
kind of move away from the door. There's there's a level of
distrust that has kind of fallen over for you towards Una right
now. There's just something she can't
quite put her finger on about her that's it's just creeping in
and she can't ignore it. And she's trying not to be
outwards, outwardly snappy like earlier, which is I think why
she ignored her there because she didn't want.
A repeat. Yeah.
You can hear that little the sounds of maybe Una maybe
tidying up or whatever it might be.
And a little while later you can hear her footsteps kinda coming
back down the hall. You're a door open and door
close. It's only when the cabin goes
completely silent do you realize that it is pitch dark outside.
It's. Like.
How long were you sleeping? And as you lie there and there
is just a faint, like, almost like a whisper of light coming
in the window, you just feel the stillness of this place again.
But it is heavy and it is pressing.
I think not being able to go back asleep via does kind of sit
up. I don't know if there was paper
and pencils in the stuff that she received, but if there was,
whether like she would be taking that out now.
It's that would say kind of as you were, you know, pottering
around the house, you found like the paper is slightly damp and
stuff like that. So again, it might have been
near the fire for a small bit. But yeah, you have some kind of
like writing supplies, so. This is the first time for Phea
since like she wrote the notes to her friends that she's going
to be writing something and it's something that she's never
really written before. Like before when Phea would
write in her her Diaries or anything was either to recount
the day that she just had and the great things about the day
that she just had or like the letters telling someone how she
felt when she wasn't able to actually verbalize the words
even if it was something small. It was the same with her
brother. Whenever they would fight, she
would write a little letter to them to say how she felt and
apologize even if she felt like she did no wrong, but just to
make everyone happy. This time she's writing her
memories of this place, trying to put it down, trying to it
very factual writing, very Quillo writing, trying to
remember exactly what happened here and not through how she
would tint it Rosalie, how she would tint her her her memories.
So you're, it's like, you're like trying to catalogue the
memories. So like the snowman, the the
dolls, the the the drawings on the wall, the food, the times
between where we into we were coming back from visage versus
leaving Galeshire and like trying to trace it all.
And even then, just from that memory of hearing that her mom
wasn't always there, it's like none of the memory she's had so
far, her mom hasn't been there. So trying to see if she can pull
on like is was her mom actually there in those memories or was
it just her trying to put that memory in the best version of
what Theo wanted? Give me a insight check.
Insight. OK, that's an that one.
As you're putting all these down, it is that thing of like,
you can't remember dates. It's not like kind of a it's not
that organized. It's more like, I remember being
here when we were four. I remember being here when I
was, you know, five and then so on.
It's that like those kind of snapshots.
And again, it's the, it's, it's memories associated to things
rather than, uh, a kind of a real time, like like a linear
chronological sort of map of everything.
And as you seek those memories and as you kind of try and put
them in order, you find yourself via kind of, it's very
difficult, especially as you go to search for the memories of
Una. You can't fully remember how
much she was there. And when she is there, there is
just this complete mistrust of the memory.
It's that thing of I, is that just something I told myself?
Is that just something I I, that none of the memories feel?
Again, it's that tangibility, the everything's a bit of a
blur. Everything's a bit of a mess as
you kind of, again, it's like, it's like anyone trying to
remember parts of their childhood.
There's distinct moments that kind of linger, but.
There's no attachment to to when actually tangibly happened or
anything. And you again, it's not that you
don't have memories of Una not being there.
You, you, you have memories of Una being gone and it's just you
and Quilo and Forrest, but you're not sure what those
memories after she left and didn't come back or if.
They were dispersed in between. In between, yeah.
As much as that rest earlier on kind of helped, that tiredness
is still there. And as you are kind of, you
know, writing these memories down and kind of keeping, you've
kind of lost yourself in them. It's only when you kind of get
come to that thing of like, I've been chasing my tail.
I've been chasing these memories and I can't make sense of them.
You've kind of, you've filled at least three pages both sides.
And as you stare down, like so many of these memories are
happy. So many of these memories are
good memories, but I don't feel like they're your memories.
And as you look around, kind of the room and your eyes having
adjusted to the dark, dark vision.
Yeah. But that thing of like, not so
much. You've been looking at kind of
having been focused on the paper and the words and the pencil.
You kind of holding them up, kind of looking at them.
The stillness is still there, the quietness.
And there is just in the dark you can hear mumbling.
I get up to seek out what it is with a dagger in hand.
You reach for your belongings, draw dagger, and as you kind of
move towards the the door, it's coming from across the hall and
you can clearly hear Una's voice, though you're not.
It's a muttering, like it's like a whisper.
You can clearly hear it just sort of catching on the quiet.
I The curiosity gets the best of me.
I. I.
Hilt my dagger and I want to sneak closer.
It's like out and sneak closer to the door to listen.
Still check. Yeah, here we go, 14.
One moment. OK, I'll.
Just check Una's passive perception.
Yeah, fuck. Again.
It's a thing of like, you turn the door and you lift it and
you're very, very careful as you sort of slide out into the hall.
And not, not not even fully, but it's just a thing of like, if I
can get a little closer to the door, I can hear.
And as you kind of glide, there is just one of the floorboards
beneath your feet. Just kind of half groans and the
whispering stops. I don't move.
Yeah. Stay quiet.
Should I do understand? Maybe to hold it?
No. What's your passive perception?
20. 22 Fuck there. It's, I think, like you're
almost holding your breath and the door opens and Una standing
there staring at you. Is everything OK?
Yeah, I was just, I wasn't tired.
I was getting up. I didn't want to disturb you.
Oh, there's still some Stew and you see that she kind of pulls a
blanket off the the bed. I actually can't sleep myself.
OK, yeah, I was just going to grab the ball and go back to
bed. I am, and she closes the door
behind her and she kind of takes the the lead towards the the
living space on that little kind of kitchen alcove.
I'll get you some. It's fine.
I can get it myself, mom, it's fine.
You haven't tasted my perfected or cube Stew.
It's fine, mom. I can get, I can get it myself.
It's just. It's fine.
It's this is what moms do. So, and she's kind of like
glanced kind of past you and into the alcove and she's taking
kind of the, the pot and you see that there's just this large
kind of, hey, it's the same pot that the oats were cooked in and
she's taking out kind of a couple of legs of it just
putting into a smaller pot and. It's her back turned right now,
yeah. A wave of inspiration hits over
Fiat. She remembers the flower and she
quickly takes a petal out and pops it in her mouth.
The flower that Julia, yeah, gave you.
Yeah. You take the the petal from the
the pouch and you place on your tongue and it has this.
At first there is that sort of like faded floral taste to it.
Then it gets quite metallic and kind of just as you chew and
tear it, it is that sort of like it, it's that sort of grassy,
metally bitter taste to it. And as you swallow it, you again
that it's somewhat coating your throat, uh, as it slides down
and Una turns back and she's kind of, uh, she has that
smaller pot in one hand and she's got a bowl in the other
with kind of a spoon in it. And she's gone over to the
fireplace and now she's stocking it with a a small little kind of
metal rod and she's thrown out a few more smaller pieces of
timber onto it. The the logs you got are are are
drying really well. And she's kind of like, hoisted
the pot onto the small little black grill.
You don't have to stay up with me, I'm fine.
It's I, I can't sleep myself. I I think it's the quietness.
How does it feel being in this place again for you?
The cabin. Well, yeah.
I mean. Is it sad because I mean, you
did leave us? Does it bring back memories of
when we were here together? Speaking of memories, I am, I
was gonna show you this tomorrow, but from under the
kind of the, the blanket and like one of the shawls, uh, she
has a small little book. It's very faded looking and you
can see that the edges of it are frayed, but in sort of a deep
rinse black, you can see the words the faraway wishing tree.
And like an illustration of like this big, big oak tree where
like little glowing orbs sort of set in the background and what
looks to be like a bunch of children kind of like holding
hands around it. Do you remember this?
I reach my hand out to suggest taking it from her.
As you take it in one hand and she's holding the other, she
puts her hand kind of on yours and she kind of, she kind of
cops your fingers a little bit. I read this to you all the time.
I don't remember. And she kind of lets the book
go. Is looking down at the the cover
of the book now and running her fingers over it.
It's embossed and is that kind of?
Kind of. It's kind of faded in.
Yes, yeah, it's quite an old looking book and kind of as you
kind of look kind of run through it, you do kind of see again
kind of the back of the book. And there is like property of
the Thea Burbidge Library kind of scrawled on it.
And then like that's kind of half crossed out and there's a
Quillo was here, Phia sucks sort of like underneath it with like
kind of a a little kind of devil's head and a tongue
sticking out of it. Sigh of amused disappointment
kind of leaves Phia seeing Quillo having scratched that
out. Una has kind of turned to like
tend to the pot and just kind of stirring it.
Yeah. Umm, you wouldn't go to sleep
anywhere unless I read you one of those stories.
Having it in my hand now and haven't taken the flower.
Has anything coming back with that?
Everything. It's that thing of when she
showed it to you. Nothing but that metallic taste
from the flower as you feel it sort of sit in your stomach.
There is this at first it's like, it's like taking
peppermint and that thing of like the, the heat of it, uh, in
your tummy. This, this isn't just oh, that
feels warm. This is, this feels hot.
This feels like, like at first I'm almost even kind of painful.
And then you feel all of that heat and that warmth just kind
of course through your body and your muscles and everything feel
a little bit more limber, a little bit more themselves.
And the weight just kind of melts off your shoulders and it
kind of rushes to your head in that heat.
And you feel it like the blood almost kind of bubbling in the
same way the Stew is kind of beginning to bubble in the pot.
And like the redness kind of comes back into your cheeks and
you are awake. You are like aware, and you
remember every story from the faraway wishing tree.
All of them. The the little boy who wished he
was a crane so that he could fly around the world and he grew
wings. The little girl who wished she
could speak to animals and then learned that raccoons have the
filthiest mouths on the planet. The boy who wished he'd never
grow up, uh, and stayed a boy forever and now lives, you know,
at the the wishing tree and all of these stories and Una reading
them to you and to Quillo. And you remember the way she
tells the stories and the voices that she would do.
And sometimes she would even have forests kind of come in and
he'd often be the voice of Grandfather Oak.
The tree itself, all of it comes rushing back.
And there's just a moment where like as you're kind of skimming
through the the pages and it's like it feels delicate. 2 little
drops of water land on a page and you find your eyes stinging
as you have welled up with tears.
Realizing she has she, she takes her arm and the like the
clothing on her arm and roughly wipes her face.
As the Stew is good, it's ready. I mean, I hope it's good.
I I didn't it's not burned. I and she kind of goes to take
the the book away if you it's a thing.
She goes to take the book and she goes to hand you the bowl.
It's kind of kind of lost in her inner thoughts, like embracing
what the the the pedal is showing her.
It's it's kind of just automatic where FIA lets her and she takes
the bowl give. Me a perception check had
advantage. 28. You it's that thing of like Una
kind of puts you in the chair, she kind of sits you down and
she stows the book away and like that thing of she's kind of
almost trying to help you eat as well.
She kind of, she sees you kind of not in your body.
It's that thing of like kind of mothering you a little bit.
And you can, you can actually feel the wind hitting the, the
walls of the cabin. Like there's a there's a breeze
in though you can't hear it. You feel it and the draft kind
of coming in through the gaps. You can feel the grooves in the
chair. You can feel the texture of the
the clothes that sit against your skin.
You can taste almost the grass and the roots that the boar was
eating. You can taste it in the sinewy
flesh as your teeth kind of cut and tear into it and there's a
bitterness to the gravy. All of these things kind of well
up your senses and you see somebody outside the window.
There's a figure in the dark staring in the window I don't
know if anyone's looking at. Me, but my eyes have darted up.
On her, staring at the window like attention has kind of set
over. She'd kind of gone back to the
book. A little bit and then seeing you
kind of stand up and stares. Fear, fear.
Are you OK? Someone's outside and she goes
to to look where, sweetheart? I point in the.
Direction of where I can. See the figure.
I. I can't see anybody.
And then you kind of feel like at the back of her hand to kind
of press against your forehead. You are, you are burning up.
Umm, are you feeling OK? I feel fine.
And my eyes are still. Is the figure still?
There, because I'm still staring.
Yeah. Can I make out any shape of the
figure? Or anything?
Or is it just a? Silhouette.
It's a silhouette. They're but they're tall.
OK, and even though you can't see their eyes, you feel them on
you. Does it feel familiar?
Yes and no. OK, it's a.
Deja vu. Almost.
Just. Kind of looking at this figure
then my eyes. Slowly pan over to Una.
You're. Beginning to worry me.
Fi, I think and she kind of goes to take the the bowl from you.
No, I've gripped onto the. I think you need to go to bed,
no? Sweetheart, there's there's.
There's nobody out there. There's there's nothing out
there. There's no Nobody knows we're
here. I go and I sit down and I kind
of keep my eyes. On Una.
I'm angelic. She walks to the window.
Fear. There's nobody there.
Is the figure still there? The figure has come closer.
And. You.
Watch as kind of like Una, like she's pointing out the window,
you see them kind of moving right towards the glass.
Is the feeling increasing? As they're getting closer,
there's an like an anxiety. Beginning to well up all the
while you feel them kind of watching you, staring at you.
And as Una goes to kind of draw the curtains, like she she pulls
as she half hesitates and she shots them.
Sweetheart, it's time for bed. No, I'm.
Fine. Yeah, we have a couple of days.
Here. You need to catch up on your
strength. You need rest.
I know, I know I do. But.
I'm fine right now, it's late. I know.
Stop treating me like a child. Right now I'm fine.
OK good night. And she leaves Pheas thoughts.
Go back to. That memory she had before, just
before she took the petal of her and Quillo listening at the
door. To her parents, just.
Trying to think of other Times Now that she has this clarity on
her, where things were not so rosy between the two of them.
Give me an insight. Check straight roll or just Oh,
no advantage again. Vantage, Yeah.
At 21. As you watch Una.
Like drift out of the room and she kind of puts a hand on your
shoulder, kind of giving it a squeeze.
And down the hallway, you hear her door open and close again.
All the while you're still staring at the the curtains, and
they're just this kind of very faded, ratty cloth kind of stuff
to still have hanging there. You can't see the.
Figure anymore but. You it's, it's, it's a feeling.
You know they're on the other side.
You know that there's somebody out there.
You. You try and go back to those
memories and it's that thing of as you fall back.
Into them. It's like plunging your head
into ice cold water and it is a rush for you, you.
Hear. Forests and Una barking at each
other, tearing strips off each other, journeys to and from
Visage to and from Galeshire, on the road, in the cabin, in
Tesrab, always fighting, always bickering, Una never around.
All these moments where Boris would fall in on himself and
close off to Ye, and over the years that frustration and anger
almost turning on Ye every. Now and again Una flitting in
and. Flitting out until she no longer
appeared. And it's that moment.
Where? In that clarity, those hazy
memories. Because for all the memories
that there are of those, there are so many.
More or Uno wasn't. There so many special moments,
so many trips, so many birthdays.
Holidays all the SO. Many firsts that she wasn't
around and the toll that put on the family, the toll that put on
forests. To be both mother and father, to
be both care and provider. I think in this clarity.
That she has she. Sees where Thea's mask emerged
of this happy presence as a yin to the Yang of her father being
withdrawn and reserved. She wanted to not cause any more
to him from what she could see he was feeling.
That's where she sees where she's.
Built up this persona that. She always tried to push.
To push out to her own detriment to suppressing how she felt.
To make sure everyone else around her felt OK.
How's that realization? Hits and it hits hard via You
feel that heat in your stomach become.
A stabbing. Pain take 11 poison damage and
that metallic. Taste in your throat.
Bubbles up and you can taste blood.
She feels like she wants to throw up, so she.
Throws up in the. Bowl, if anything's going to
come out, you, I think. It's it's more of a hacking.
Than a yeah a vomit but when you do it is just blood.
Very freaked out by this. Again, she goes to cover the
evidence of. It, but it's.
It's different this time. It's not where she was when she
was with the burnt porridge trying to cover up and make
things nice for everyone else's sake.
Now she's. Cleaning and covering up.
For her sake as you stumble into the kitchen.
And again you can. Like you feel that knot tighten
in your stomach, that presence outside shifts.
It's almost like it moves with you as you move through the
house. And here now it's, it's on the
other side of the the cabin looking in.
And as you drift kind of between the living room and the small
little galley kitchen, cleaning and hiding the the evidence, you
feel its presence and that stillness just bear down further
and the entire room goes dark as you see the, the light from the
fireplace. Just it's just, it vanishes and
you're standing in pure darkness and there is just a laughter
echoing all around you. Kind of laughter is.
Menacing at first, it feels like. 100 people are.
Laughing. But it is just one voice.
It is shrill and it is sharp. It feels cutting.
It feels mocking. Little.
Bird lost in her memory. I will leave the episode there.
Oh, now you've been listening to
Romancing the Dungeon with Louise.
As Thea and me, Deckham, as your Dungeon Master, listening back
to the episode that we recorded. And this is the fourth episode
that Louise and I have done solo and there's many more to come.
I'm really, really grateful that I get to explore such heavy
themes and engage in some really emotional role play with the
players around my table. But I do want to flag that it is
important to do regular check insurance with the players at
your table, not just the initial sessions 0.
But as the campaign goes on, I promise you you'll only end up
getting way more out of your table and your story if you do
regular check insurance to make sure that everybody around that
space is comfortable and enjoying themselves.
A big thank you to Stephen Tynen.
And Abby soiree for. Our theme song, Fight for Each
Other, the title card and artwork for the podcast series
is by Daisy Designs. And for more from DA Dungeon,
why not check us out on social media at DA Dungeon on all major
social media platforms. You can check out our Twitch
channel where we stream every Monday and Thursday with
different shows. And wherever you're listening to
this podcast, we would love if you would give us a thumbs up,
leave a five star review or a comment.
That's it for us for this episode.
We're back in two weeks time. We'll see you then.
Is there any? Also, just as an FYI, this is.
Evidence that I can be. Incredibly wholesome as Adm Oh
yeah, 100% it's it's here. It's.
Captured. I'm ready to be emotionally
tortured now. I didn't say I was constantly
wholesome. No, but it feels like you're
probably up to this level where it's like.
Die what? No, I'm not setting you up for
heartache.