Hi, welcome to the latest episode of Call Me a Mistress.
I am Mistress Mia and I've got Madame Liv.
Hi, guys. Now you're whispering.
OK. Hi guys, it's me.
Liv is such a little jokester, prankster, funny, goofy person.
I mean, you don't. They don't see this side of you,
which is really funny. Yeah, they see a different side.
I have different personas I can put on.
You do because yesterday you're just, we had the best time and
then I'm like, God, she's goofy as shit.
We have such a great time and I'm laying in a bed.
I'm like, God, she's so awesome. I'm like, Liv, you are so
awesome. I'm so glad we met.
I know you're getting on the issue with me I.
Know I know, but I love you. You're great.
I love you too. So we always have admirers that
write us and I like to read some of the emails sometimes when
they pop up on my fat feed or or e-mail.
Now we've had some haters, you know, at the end of the year
I've been called a few nice lovely things, but I don't give
a fuck. Yeah, honestly, it's like it's
almost funny. And then we just go to the ones
that actually like us. Yeah, there's so much.
More of the ones that like us, yes.
You're like four people. You don't want that?
Don't like who? Cares who cares?
Fucking haters, fuck them all. Right, so this guy contacted us.
I'm fat and he's like, he's like, I've been a longtime
listener for the foreseeable future.
Mistress Mia, I love your podcast.
The banter between you and Barbie is the best.
Don't ever change that, please. I laugh and I smile throughout
your podcast episodes. I get so intrigued by your
famous parties and I hear you guys talk about him.
I just wish I lived in the US to attend one.
That would be a dream come true. That's sweet.
That is sweet. I'm like, oh.
We have one coming up and travel to come see us.
Right. And then this gentleman wrote me
this past week. Same guy, No.
OK. New e-mail, new listener, new
fan, and talk about a sweetheart.
So he's on Fat Life. I won't tell you his full name,
but Wolf is in his name. So we're going to call him Big
Wolf. So he writes me.
He's like, I just want to say thank you for making your
podcast. I just discovered it.
It's amazing. I've been laughing my ass off
most of the day and hopefully one day, if ever, I'll make it
back to Florida. I would love to come and book an
appointment. I appreciate you and everything
you're doing and please keep up the great work with the podcast.
Have a beautiful day and thank you again.
That's sweet. And that's sweet.
I thought that was so cool. I love.
When they say nice things to us about that.
Oh, my gosh, yeah. You know, so I wrote him back
and I told him that he's got a lot of cool pictures of him and
his dog and he's got a beautiful little puppy, you know?
And so I wrote him back and I'm like, oh, I love, you know,
pictures of your dog. And he's like, yeah, you know,
my, my tea is I guess her name is his world.
And, and he's a truck driver, so he's driving and it's cold and,
you know, but he said he liked reading my profile, looking at
all of our photos, and he still said he was trying to figure out
who everyone was from the podcast.
So I sent him pictures of you and Barbie and myself so he
would kind of. Get it like a better idea?
Yeah, just like a singular, hey, this is her but, but he's like,
yeah, I don't mean to bug you. I'm like, you're not bugging me.
I love these nice emails. Yeah, that's not bugging.
They're cool, right? Yeah.
But then, which was really interesting at the end of last
year, I just like to throw this in because I think it's very
amusing with people. You know, BDSM is so taboo in so
many circles. It's like I've tried to tell
parts of my family that there's so many things that I do that
help other people. Yeah, you probably save people's
lives and don't even know it. You know, and if that's the
case, I, I'm happy to do it because I love the people that
come into my life that show heart and goodness, you know,
they're just pure. Love, pure love.
Yeah, You know, that's what God is, is love.
That's it. And we're spreading.
Love that's it. And so I got this lovely comment
here because they reported this video podcast episode that I did
with Charles where he's, you know, he's a grown ass man.
You know, he's almost 50. Me.
Too, He's not. He does not look like a little
boy at all. No, he's not even a little boy.
No, but I mean, he's short and cute, but he's a grown ass man
in this video. But the video was degrading a
Sissy girl. Eat your come Sissy.
And it was it was a cool video. It was him sucking a strap on.
There really wasn't, you know, big nudity other than the fact
that he was jacking off at the end of it.
And I made him meet his own calm.
And what was really funny is he was like kind of setting the
stage. So he got a a black dinner
plate, but it was glass, it was porcelain, right?
So he said it made the cum colder quicker.
And he said it was so gross. You know when he did it, he.
Only likes hot cum. Yeah, he likes it.
Like fresh out of the tap, you know?
I mean chocolate and I'm. Not cooked on my.
Chocolate you're eating. Chocolate, not cum.
You're OK live, you're good. But anyway, someone commented.
I was like, Oh my God, but they posted on on Spotify.
Turn to Jesus. Don't fall back into the cycle
of lust. The devil is always tempting you
by saying just one more time, but really it'll be an endless
cycle of lust. You don't seek.
If you don't seek Jesus, he will forgive you.
Just ask for his strength and wisdom when dealing with lust.
Well, here's the thing. He Charles, is not hurting
anybody. No.
He's all by. Himself, he's all by himself,
he's all by you know, he's he's not hurting anyone.
And the simple fact of it is, these people, you know, they
forget that Jesus best friend was a hooker, Mary Magdalene,
and that he. Was in love with her.
Yeah, and he had 12 disciples following him around in the
desert and all sinners, All sinners.
And, you know, they're known in the Middle East.
You know, Iraq is boys are for pleasure, women are for
breeding. You know, there's so many parts
in the Middle East where it's, you know, freely open
homosexuality, you know, in certain countries.
Obviously, you know, Iran has changed, you know, and that was
the original Persia, which is where, you know, Christ kind of
like originated in that vicinity.
But here we're getting into a biblical discussion on a BDSN
podcast. But my point of it is.
Brave Jesus. I'll start with some.
But you know, it's like, OK, we love God.
We're Christians. However, in this scenario, he's
not hurting anybody. No, But yet this person tried to
say that I was a child's groomer.
Like I was grooming kids for this video.
And I'm like what? Don't know where.
You don't know where that even came out, honestly.
But yeah, there, that is just it.
It's really a profound thing. And it brings me to my topic of
how taboo BDSM is so interesting.
So we we were having conversation.
You were there the other night when we all had dinner, OK.
We were all out with my family and my, my sister, my oldest
sister, she's 62. She has, has always been a very
devout Catholic. We were raised Catholic.
And she starts really saying things under her breath when it
comes to me and the podcast. And she, she has called me many
things that weren't very unkind about what I do and talking
about the podcast, talking about sex, that kind of thing.
And so, you know, I told her I'm like, you know, we are, we're
all in this together, you know, and BDSM is just something else
that other people like to do. And it's doesn't make us
deviance. It doesn't make us horrible
people. No, you know, And so she was
sitting there and she was telling us about her brother and
her brother-in-law and sister-in-law on her husband's
side of the family. Apparently the brother-in-law
has a Bigfoot fetish and he they always had a sex swing, you
know, and she says, you know, they're just nothing but
deviance. They're they're just sick.
They're just sick people. I think it's sick if you're just
going to have monotone sex. Yeah, well, you know, they used
to have sex, Her and her gay husband who came out of the
closet. Oh nice.
You know that they used to have sex every Tuesday night,
scheduled scheduled sex, and that was not an indication.
That's deviant. You know what that man is going
through? That's why he went gay.
Yeah. My God.
Yeah. But, you know, I told her, I
said, you know, I said everybody has a fetish.
I said it could be spanking, it could be feet, it could be the
way someone smells. You know, it could be.
It's something as simple. Simple as like hands.
I like man's hands. That's in itself.
It's just such a small one. Yes, vanilla, but still.
Yes, eyes. People love eyes.
Yes, it's just smaller. Scale, a smaller scale.
You know, I love it when my girlfriend wears these types of
panties. You know, it's a kink and you
know, she makes it dirty. And I said, you know, I said her
name and I said, you know, you're just making it dirty.
I said he made it dirty, you know, because he ended up
cheating on his wife, cheated on his wife with multiple
prostitutes, you know, and honestly, he was never a nice
guy. He's not a great person,
obviously was not a great husband, you know, but it is
what it is. And so I, I bring this topic up
because so many people struggle with having these fetishes and
having these kinks, you know, and it's just like your admirer
who reached out to you. He said he wanted skin on skin.
He obviously lacks intimacy. You know, the other night once
you left. So just to give the listeners
some background on this. OK, so we're recording the
fucked up Friday. And there was you, myself and
Ruby. We were the three doms in there.
And then Naomi came in, so it was four women.
And then we had Charles that came in to help us.
And then we had AJ, who was the Sissy slut who participated.
He was cool with us giving, you know, his name out.
He has no secrecy about it. And then we had one other
gentleman who's one of our regular folks.
He comes to events, he comes for sessions.
Nice guy, name is Brian. No big deal.
Anyway, so Brian, he's lacking intimacy in his marriage and he
went and said to, to Naomi, he's like, would you just do a
session with me where, you know, we just touch one another, you
know, and he's like, you know, I, I like to give massages and
I, you know, he basically, he likes heavy petting, obviously,
but without the sex. And so that says, you know, if
that's his kink, who's he hurting?
You know, does that make him a sexual deviant?
I don't want a pet. Yeah, you know, because that's
my point. It's like, you know, my sister
turned around and said that it was, you know, his foot fetish
and his his sex Wang that made him disgusting.
And I was like. That's why people fall into
themselves and don't talk about themselves.
Yeah. Because of people like that.
Because, you know, you live with this, you can't.
And there's some people that have it.
So, you know, it's a real thing. You know, we're made in the
image of him. So it's like you have this thing
and you're not, you know, it's better to just fulfill it fully,
be yourself. And if it means having this
thing that if you hold it in it, it it's like a cancer it.
Is it eats you up for real? I'm so glad you said that
because you know, that's what so many people have issues with.
And, you know, one of the gentlemen in that room had said
to me it wasn't Charles. Obviously Charles is very open
with everything about himself he had.
Fun. I liked watching him have fun.
Oh, he's so sweet. He's such a doll.
But it's interesting because these other guys, they've
struggled with their bisexuality, you know, and they
both want to be forced to do it so they won't feel guilt.
And I said, guys, you know, everyone in this room is
bisexual. You know, we're all bisexual on
some level, you know? Yeah.
You don't want a relationship with the dude because you're a
dude, you know? But would you suck a Dick
because it's a Dick? Yeah.
Go ahead. So tell us, Liv, what was your
first sexual experience with another woman?
Well, I've, I, I'm going to say like the first, first one
because I was really young. I, I, I feel like I've always
had these problems. But when I first realized it, I
was, I was really young because I kissed a girl on the bus.
We were dare to do it, you know, and we're like, oh, yeah.
And I kissed her. She had long curly brown hair
and I got to kiss her. And that was like my first real
experience with touching another woman with my face.
I'm like, I didn't even know I liked that Then you know, I sent
a picture of my who nanny out to a boy.
OK, your hoop nanny. My hoop.
Nanny, I sent that to a boy and
you know, cameras back in the day on the phone.
Which not. Flattering and I Oh.
No. I did not know.
I just took I literally ran, you know, took that picture and I
sent it to him and he replied you so so I was traumatized for
a good while. Did it meow they probably I
don't know, but I I went to my best friend and I was like, can
I see your vagina? Like just like matter of fact,
And I just kind of see it till I know if I'm OK or not, Like am I
normal or do I look you you know what I mean.
I want to know. And she said you to me and I was
just like really let down by that.
We weren't friends no more, but that's like the second
encounter. But the one as an adult.
Yeah, I know. I've always been by.
Just never really. Poor girl.
I know whatever, but. First experience as an adult was
right whenever I was out of my marriage and I was just like let
loose into the into the wild. And I went to a bar and the this
couple came up to me and was just like kind of just playing
around. Like, hey, you want to hang out
at my house on a weekend And we do like dinner and stuff.
Like, sure, I went over there, we cooked out and she just
pulled her titty out. Big ass titties.
I'm coming out. Her body was tiny framed, but
she had the biggest titties. She squirted.
Me with her breast milk. Oh my God.
That's how she did it. That's how she started this
whole thing. I was like, I didn't know how to
think about it. I didn't find it sexy at all,
you know? I was like, well, that's
interesting you. Know OK, wow.
And eventually we actually all got too nervous and we I was
about to leak, so I was getting too late.
And she said, well, let me show you around the house.
Let me tell you, show me her room, the first one.
And she just sits on the bed, takes off her shirt.
I was like, OK, that's what we're doing and I got to enjoy
both of them at the same time. And that was.
All right. Was my first true experience.
So I got to like see and touch and like, are we the same?
And all these things like I got to actually do that.
And it was so, you know, with anybody else in the whole world,
I probably would have like not been gay after that.
But she made it so comfortable. She was so sweet.
She didn't make anything sexy like over the top.
She was everything was just cute.
She was cute. She would be running around
like, like chasing me and stuff and I'm like, it was cute.
It was not a sexy experience, but it was one of the best
experiences I ever had. And, you know, kudos to her.
But she knew what she was doing because they moved like the next
week. They had planned to do this
before they moved so they would never see me again.
And I wasn't made aware. And it hurt my.
Feelings. Wow.
But they did that be like, oh, well, we're moving, so we'll
let's do this before we move. And then we get in a whole new
area. And so that's what happened.
They moved like 3-4 hours away in that.
Come to find out though, 'cause her husband reached out to me
like a year later and he was like, yeah, we actually had made
a baby that night. So they had a baby and and named
it after one of his tattoos. Wow.
I know. I was like, Oh my God, I helped
make a baby. Oh wow, that's cool.
It was your sperm and everything.
I know I was. I was like, that baby's mine
too. I helped make it.
Oh, shit, that's interesting. Yeah, you know, I don't know, I
I've had, I did my own little experience experimentations
after my first divorce, but during my divorce, I mean during
my marriage, excuse me, during my marriage to my first husband,
my best friend that I grew up with thought that it would going
to be cool if she came in on the shower with me and like.
While you're married. Yeah, and, and my husband was
there. He wanted to watch.
Oh OK so there y'all are into it.
Well, I wasn't into it. Oh, because they just shocked
me. I should have locked my damn
bathroom door because I don't want to.
I didn't want to make out or even have sex or anything.
You didn't want to have anything with a.
Woman. No, not with her.
Oh, not with her. Yeah, not with her and not with
my my ogling looking, you know, husband at the time, like, you
know, standing there jacking his Dick, you know, it's like.
Oh, that does sound kind of. Cringy.
It was like here I'm going to take a hot shower before I go to
bed and I've got horny one and horny 2.
Like hounding me like that wasn't fun.
That was your first experience? That was my first experience
when I. Wasn't like an awakening?
No, not an awakening. Probably when I was dating
someone after my first marriage, after my first divorce, my first
marriage and I met somebody we were, you know, through like
alter one of those dating sites, whatever.
And you know, I met her and she's I I like pretty black
women, you know, my best friend growing up.
She is a pale white girl with red hair.
I don't like gingers. I'm not sexually attracted to
gingers. I don't like red hair.
I do not like that Sam. I am.
I don't like it. Oh, poor gingers out in the
world, Yeah. You know, I mean, I've slept
with ginger men, but ginger women.
I feel like I feel like I'd rather have a gender woman than
a gender man, and my boyfriend right now told me that ginger
women have a specific thing in their vagina that's different
from all other women. OK, I'm unaware of that.
I'm unaware of it too. I want to find out How did I
find out though? Would she have freckles?
Well you don't ask as ex see if she spread that pussy for you.
She probably would. I I don't know if we're talking
about the one that I'm thinking about, no.
Yeah, she's a fun little bitch. You know, with him, I'm, I'm
able to be open in things. So like he would let me, you
know, experiment. Yeah.
With a redhead, Yes. And he likes redheads anyway, so
it's like works out. Yeah, I know he.
Likes different in there. What's different?
You know, and the thing that is, there's some beautiful redheads.
I get it. Beautiful women.
Amy Adams, love her, right, But my best friend, she was a
stripper growing up. She was, you know, way ahead of
everyone else, like losing her virginity at, you know, 1213
years of age. It was bad and I just I was, I'm
just not attracted to, you know, your best friend like that.
It's just kind of like, you know, we're broskis, not, you
know, a little fuck buddies. I would have.
Them with my friend. My answer to see my vagina.
Yeah. Yeah, you're probably messing.
So she don't she don't talk to me no more.
I reach out every now and then. She's like, that's that creeper
live. Yeah.
No, but you know, again, she's she's probably closeted.
She's probably just like, you know, I don't want to step over
that threshold and because people are scared by it.
Because I think it's taboo because everything that's, you
know, like there are so many cultures, so many religions that
isn't like religions that are here in the US There's a lot of
religions that have where you have multiple wives or multiple
husbands, like it's polyamorous as part of a religion.
You know, you're just like, yeah, you know what's right and
what's wrong in that? So just, I would say just be a
good person, be the best you can be, you know, spread love and be
who you are. Yeah.
In a nice way though. Yeah.
Like don't be it like, you know, because serial killers.
Guys, don't do that. I'm not trying to promote that,
but be yourself. Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
But you know, everybody has a flavor for what they like, you
know, and it's like I said, I'm not anti redheads.
I've slept with redhead that are men.
But you know, it's like one of them, he had a fucking hairy ass
back. It was like.
The red hair. Yeah, reddish blonde.
It was like all over. It was like so thick, like even
the sweat wouldn't absorb. It was just like sweat beaded on
him. It was like.
Yeah, you didn't have good experiences.
That was now. I didn't have good experiences.
I never did. I don't think I've ever had sex
with a redhead like a true. Redhead Oh, I have, I have I I
have fucked Indians. I've fucked Iranians.
Iraqi. Did you make it around the
world? Every fucking culture, even
Swedish I've like. Girl, you get around.
Yeah, there's hundreds. Hundreds.
Love your confidence. It's true.
It's been, there's been hundreds.
My friend and I used to have a competition with how many people
we could sleep with and we'd write them down.
And so hers would be like the pizza guy, the circus guy.
Yeah, I have a friend that we name all his little whores
because he asks a lot of people and I call him, oh, that is that
sandals? You know, because she wear these
ugly ass sandals. Is that sandals?
Yeah. Is that orangutan titties?
You know what I mean? We call we have one of those
orangutans. Oh my God, That's how we keep up
with them. So I could not keep up with
their names. Wow.
So I probably the same thing. Well, I like I said, I've always
slept with attractive black women.
Really. As women, Yeah.
Now there's this really cool couple that comes to the parties
all the time, but we're friends now.
I don't want to fuck friends, you know I don't.
That's the best kind. I don't want to do that.
I just don't like that. It's weird now.
Oh, I. Guess.
You know what I'm saying? Yeah, because you don't want to
mess with the friendship. Yeah, you don't.
And it's like. That's why if like you have sex
with somebody and especially if you're going to be close and
quarters with them only once. Now see Missus Griswold, we ran
into this before when when they first started swinging, OK, they
met this couple that were younger than them.
Well, he the husband of this other couple, they weren't
really into older women. He was not into older women, but
his wife, his wife was really into just kind of like any
attractive woman. And that they connected with,
you know, so they would go camping, They would hang out
together. And this went on for a couple of
months, you know, just a few times.
And finally they started to realize, oh, shit.
Well, the Griswolds are in their 50s, and we're in our late 20s,
early 30s. And they're like, you know, we
really care about them, but they're more like our aunt and
uncle now because we've we've come so close.
And so I've tried to explain that to Ellen.
It is. And, and Ellen, she took that
hard. And I was just like, Ellen,
they're just young kids. They just want to go and fuck.
Strange. Yeah, they have so much, you
know that they. Want to do?
Yeah, they want to fuck. Strange they they don't want to
have emotional connections to people, you know, like.
That is she just wanting like a Poly relationship with another
couple or what is her goal? What would you mean, the other
couple or the Chris Wallace? Oh, no, Ellen.
Ellen still wanted just to see them and hang out with him.
She says Mia doesn't have to be sexual.
So she just liked them. She really liked them, Yeah.
She liked being around them because they're great people,
you know? They're fun, beautiful people.
And so that was the same concept because I told I told the couple
I was like, you know, Ellen and Clark, they don't have to fuck
you all. You know, it's not like that.
They just want to be your friends, you know, And now,
granted, they don't live in the same city.
They're, you know, several hours apart now, but you know, they'll
be back at another party. I'm going to have to reach out
to them soon and and talk to them.
But you know, but I see where they're coming from because like
I said, there's a couple here and you know, I would feel
awkward in the sense that, well, I'd be fucking the wife and the
husband be OK with that, because I told the husband, I said, you
know, I'm I'm monogamous to my husband with other men.
I said, but you know, there's exceptions.
You know, we just haven't explored that Ave., you know.
But I like some sexy black women.
And I tell you what, Bree and I were in the coffee shop few
months back and there was this cute little black girl and she
was about four foot 84, foot 9. Real tiny.
Definitely your type.
Yes, didn't look like she didn't have the the the small little
person legs. They she look like it hurt.
She, her body look like a 12 year old, you know, and it was
almost like, OK, let's make sure her face looks mature enough
that she doesn't look like a child.
You know, that's creepy. But she has a very mature face.
You could tell she's in her 20s, you know, in her late 20s.
But she has this cute little voice and she's fucking
adorable. And so Bree's like, Oh my God,
she works at the car wash and I'm like, let's go get her and
kidnap her. Did you get her number?
No, because when we were in the coffee shop she was talking to
other people and I didn't want to interrupt her.
But she's in the area. She works at the car wash, so
when I go to the car wash again, I'll be a little.
Bit cute, you know, get your hair done or something.
Yeah, I'll get her number the. Car be clean when you get there.
She's like, I don't have a dirty car, I come here for you.
Hey baby, I want that brown sugar.
Oh, let me know how that goes. Yeah, I told my husband I'm
like, yeah, I just want her to sit on my lap so I can do dirty
things to her. Yeah, I've been looking for one
too. It's so hard to find.
It is a girl that would be OK with that.
Yeah, but. It's so odd.
What? Happened to the babysitter.
She started dating somebody and we never got to actually fully
play. Oh yeah, it was very sad.
We'll find yourself. Right at the moment where I
don't remember what I was going through, but I was going through
something, yeah, with my mom or somebody that it is all.
Everything collapsed all at once.
And on top of it, she cancelled. It was meant to.
Happen. Oh, yeah.
You know, I always think was like, well, maybe I always think
there's reasons for everything. So I never think like, I mean,
yes, I hurt my feelings for the fact of, like, so close, you
know? Like, yeah, he's already, you
know, my boyfriend's already played with her.
So I didn't know, like, OK, she's safe.
So I was excited. Well, March 1st is right around
the corner. You going to tear that shit up,
girlfriend? Well, I'll be working.
Yeah, you'll be working, but you can network, you know, you can
be like, hey. Yeah, I got to find out what if
me and my boyfriend have the same type we haven't explored
that I would want to share. You don't want to.
Share. I do want to share.
That's the only thing I want to do.
I don't want to be by myself. Yeah, I'm not into that.
OK, which is weird. I'm not into girls by myself
but. Well, you're, you're a good
looking couple, so it shouldn't be an issue.
But you know what he likes. You know, you're kind of you fit
the mold so. I mean.
A shorter, curvier woman. That's what he likes.
I like a little bit of like blew it more extra meat.
Than he does. Probably I like, I like a little
bit of a not, not fat, but I like little chunky women, little
chunky women, cute little round faces.
Yeah, sweet looking girls. Yeah, I get.
It the big boobies. Yeah, you would like our hot
Asian that comes to the parties. Oh my goodness.
Yeah, she's adorable. I don't.
Know I'm in the Asians. I have to.
See, you have to see. You never know.
Yeah, I don't want to. I don't want to put it off me.
Like, I don't like Asians because, you know, there's
sometimes where you just like, wow, I'd do that.
There's so many great people you're going to meet at these
parties and I'm going to introduce you.
You're going to fucking love it. You're.
Going to like maybe our listeners will be there too and
then we get to meet them. Too well, if all of our
listeners came, we would not be able to fill them in this house.
Ones that are in town, they. Would be parking 5 miles down
the road because there's several thousand that listen to the
podcast. But on that note, Liv, it's been
always great talking to you and more adventures to come.
So until then, this is the closing episode of.
Call me Mistress Bye.