Hi, welcome to the latest episode.
Call Me Mistress. I'm your Hostess, Mistress Mia,
and today we're going to read a nice little e-mail from Tony.
But before we get to that, I will tell you that I have to do
a shout out. One is to Nikki Ellitz.
I'm assuming that's the correct way you say your name, Nikki,
but I have to tell you that I am always appreciative of your
lovely feedback and your sweet little comments left on the
podcast. I truly appreciate your devotion
and I I love that you enjoy the episodes as much as I do.
Now for all of my added listeners, I will tell you that
I did speak with Baby Tay this morning and Baby Tay told me
that finally, all this time now that has gone by and his lovely
aunt finally changed his diaper. Apparently, they were watching a
college game with Alabama and Georgia this past weekend and he
bet on Alabama and they did, in fact, when and ultimately the
deal was she was to change his diaper.
And she, of course, was very ready.
She had a basket with all the toiletries set up.
So Needless to say, they had an amazing time.
Now we're going to talk about Tony for a moment.
So Tony reached out to me, as he always does, and I'm always
happy to read his emails. I'm always happy to listen to
him because I think Tony represents a lot of people,
listeners included. Because I think we all struggle
at times with our own identity of what we want and our fetishes
are kinks and what we can really do and explore in our regular
lives. And it's often difficult that so
many of us have to really limit what we can do because of our
relationships or religious beliefs or family or our living
situation. So I'm going to read Tony's
e-mail. We did an episode about this
last week. So I think it's only appropriate
that we continue so that everyone can kind of get a a
good understanding with what Tony's going through.
And he writes. Mistress, thank you again for
taking time to respond to my emails.
And thank you for responding directly via the podcast.
Hearing your voice does make a difference.
It's so soothing and calming, and I love hearing you talk it
through. Your kindness is unmatched.
Thank you for being such a caring person and for being
there for me. It means the world to me.
You're so kind that I'm having a hard time imagining you being a
dominant in the dungeon, but I bet there are plenty of people
who can attest to your skills. I love that you love gay porn as
much as I do. I would be so interested to see
what kind of gay porn you enjoy watching.
I love women who enjoy gay porn and enjoy by men.
If you're interested, I would love to share with you a gay
Bondage Twitter account that I follow.
They do excellent work with Bondage.
You may enjoy it. I love your mom too by the way.
It always cracks me up when you talk about her.
Also your story about your doctor friend who would go to
glory holes with you on the phone.
It was so hot. I love encouraged by play a lot.
I know we talked about forced by play before.
I love thinking of that. He was sucking cock at your
command. It was a form of tribute to you,
by him. I have to know, were you
flattered by what he was doing? I've been mulling my submission
options over in my head since listening to the podcast.
It's clear to me now that my wife is not a Dom.
We had an interesting conversation just last evening.
I've known for quite a while now that my wife's old roommate from
when she was 21 had a boyfriend who was a sub.
She used to tell me that her roommate would dawn for him and
she would tell me how her roommate would tell her about
her pegging him and other things.
Just by chance we got into a conversation about humiliation
and verbal humiliation. Long story short, we were
talking about how certain men and women like that being
degraded and talked down to being insulted.
She said she doesn't think she could ever do that.
She said she would feel so bad about it and she would also feel
disconnected by it. Sigh.
I understand her. We can only do what we feel
comfortable doing. I would never force something
like that on someone I love. That being said, I would not
feel comfortable finding someone on Fetlife to be submissive to.
I think that would not really be appropriate given my situation.
I would consider a pro Dom. I like that there's no feelings
involved and it can be planned and scheduled and expectations
set. My only problem is there's not a
lot of pro Dom options where I am.
I know of one, maybe 2. Also, it's tough to get out and
find the time. My wife doesn't keep me on a
tight leash even though I'd love to be collared.
But if I'm not at work I'm usually home with our son.
It'd be odd if I was gone for hours, but there are times where
that may be possible. I've been considering a virtual
dominant. There are plenty of Doms online
who will do some kind of virtual play.
I think that might be a good middle ground for me.
My only hesitation is I really don't know what to expect from
that. I've done popper breath play
with Dominic Cam models before, but obviously that's pretty
quick. It's something I want to look
into. I think it might help.
We will see. Thank you again for taking the
time to speak to me and to let me go through these feelings and
thoughts with you. I just love that you'd like to
share this kinky world with everyone, that you accept people
with open arms. I'm so appreciative what you do
for the BDSM community as a whole.
You make it easier for people like me who have certain
feelings and don't know what to do with it.
I know what you do is not easy and there are plenty of
headaches and daily struggles with what you deal with.
I just hope you know that you are loved and appreciated for
what you do. I hope you enjoy doing it as
much as I enjoy hearing about it.
All the best, Tony. I mean, how could you not love
this man? He is the sweetest.
Tony, I just adore you. So I'm going to go back and
break down things as we process the e-mail that you've written
to me. So nice.
You know, your compliments are always so kind and I truly
appreciate that. You know, I just try to be
helpful to people. I feel like if I can be one of
those people that help other people through their process of
finding themselves or finding their kinks and what they really
enjoy, and I'm happy to do it. I think it's it's so uplifting,
it's so rewarding and I really can't think of something better
that I'd really like to do. I've always been in one of those
positions in life where I've always helped people and it's
always been my passion. Now I think that I'll answer
your first question and that was what kind of gay porn do I like?
Please share your gay Your Gay Bondage Twitter account with me.
I think I'm always looking for good gay porn, but my favorites
are like the Big Bear guys that like to fuck young submissive
virgin boys. I think, I think it's really
hot. I don't know what it is, but I
have this one particular favorite porn where it's this
this bigger man. He's probably late 50s and he's
always fucking these young twinks and they're usually bent
over or, you know, they're on their back, but they're always
calling him daddy and begging for his cock.
And of course, you know, he's got a nice fat Dick.
He really does. But it's just really hot.
I I just can't explain it. I don't know why I like it, but,
you know, they say this kind of thing is genetic.
But yeah, my mom is a fucking hoot.
My mom is super funny. I don't even know if she
realizes I talk about her on the podcast because there's so many
episodes, honestly, that I don't want her hearing about my past.
But I think she kind of knew about my sex addiction after my
first divorce. And so she was really
understanding about it. She was just like, really?
How many is that today? But she's, she's funny.
She was a devout Catholic. She's always been a very devout
Catholic, but extremely non judgmental.
She really has zero filter, which is fucking hilarious.
She is, she's 85. She just turned 85 last month.
And she's extremely passive aggressive, which is funny at
times. Other times we don't always have
the best relationship when she is very passive aggressive.
But as far as porn goes, I think she likes fucking hot Cowboys
fucking. And that's again why she loves
Brokeback Mountain. She loves Christian Gray.
She's just, she's a hoot. I could go on about that, but I
will. I'll go on to your next
question, which was, Oh, my doctor friend, my doctor friend
of Fort Lauderdale. This guy was sexy as fuck.
Really not my type of guy. He's he's bald, which is cool.
I've I've fucked a lot of bald men's who with the shaved head
don't mind that at all. Sexy as fuck.
He's one of those guys. He shaves head to toe, just
fucking hot. But then he had a full on beard
mustache. I really don't get into the
beard, but mustaches I can do. I can do all day long.
But this doctor was so sexy. Oh my God.
So here he would leave the ER, he would call me and he'd be
like, Mistress, I got to go to the glory hole.
And you know, at times I'm questioning was he smoking
crack? Because this is before vape
pens. But man, he would, he would
really fucking choke on something.
He was sucking. I was assuming he was smoking
crack. I, you know, it's just, it was
one of those things at the time, you don't, you don't think about
it because you're sitting back and, you know, I'm on the phone
sometimes I would get to see him, you know, we'd get on
webcam together on Skype. But he was just a really super
cool guy. But yeah, I think that it was a
tribute to me. I think that in a lot of ways he
was kind of like my long distance cup because I would
tell him about my extensive sex life with multiple people and if
he had been in town, we had talked about meeting and we just
it was one of those things, you know, it's a big distance.
It was never, you know, direct flights where I was or where he
was and that and he worked 50 hours a week.
So, but Needless to say, he went to glory holes.
I would walk him through it and he would be like, he gets so
nervous about it. And I was just like, come on,
Jason, come on baby, you can do it.
You can have sucked that big cock for me.
And yeah, he would go in, he would tell me all about it.
And you know, I told him I'm like, I don't care if it's white
or black, just see who's got the biggest, fucking hottest,
juiciest cock. And we talked about it.
It was great. And I was, yes, I was very
flattered by him doing it because it was his passion.
It was my passion. And of course, I would send him
dirty pics and videos of my, of my multiple partners.
And you know, the whole concept of penetration or oral sex.
I have, you know what, Tony, I'm going to send you a nice picture
of a cock in my mouth and you're going to fucking love it.
So then you talk about mulling over your submission.
So I think you're absolutely right.
I think that was kind of looking at the side of you not spending
money on somebody. So maybe you wouldn't be so
invested. But I think you're right.
Maybe just keeping it with a level of professionalism is
fine. Now again, I am happy to do do
this with you. If you ever just want to sit on
the phone and you want to do FaceTime or if you want to get
on Telegram or something like that or Kik, I'll sit there with
you and we'll talk about it. We'll come up with some scenes
or scenarios. If you were my long distance
sub, I would tell you, you need to lay everything out that you
want to use in that session. I still think you need to go
back to journaling. Even if it's writing an e-mail
to me, that to me that's journaling.
That is a form of time stamp of what you're doing and how you're
feeling. So feel free just to e-mail me
and we'll, we'll talk about it. I think it's very clear, you
know, you and I have had multiple conversations about
this, that your wife is indeed not a Dom.
You know, she can't can't cater to what you want.
Therefore, I always feel like men that come to see us in the
dungeon, I don't feel like they're cheating on their wives.
I think we're doing their wives a huge service because there's a
lot of wives that don't want to humiliate their husbands.
They don't want to see their husbands dress up.
That is such a huge turn off for a lot of women.
I think that therefore it's really not a form of cheating.
I think it's a beautiful thing that you can act out your own
kinks and if that's something you enjoy and you're not hurting
your wife, it's something that is completely separate from her.
And it's not as if you're fucking some woman.
It's not that you're fucking some dude or you're getting
fucked. So I really don't see that
there's an issue with it. That's really all that it boils
down to is doing what fits you best, what you feel comfortable
doing because there are multiple types of virtual play.
I know I have my one Sissy slave and you know he's an hour and a
half away and there's times where he'll turn on his camera
and I will make him fuck his own ass.
I will have him on his knees facing the corner.
I will have him tell me all of the ways that he disappointed me
for the week. It's just really what your
expectations and what your hopes are and what you can accomplish
in that period of time. I'll comment as well on your
last paragraph, you know, about what I do for the community.
Honestly, I feel like I'm just here to help.
I think that we're all here to value and appreciate one
another. And I think that we're here to
appreciate ourselves in the community, what we can offer
other people and that we come judgment free and that we come
to explore and express and enjoy ourselves in our life and what
really makes us happy. You know, my husband told me
over the weekend, he told me that I was kind of explaining to
him the situation with one of my submissives.
And I said, you know, my one Sissy slave, he is one of those
people that struggle with substance abuse.
And there's a lot of people that I've come across that have
issues with substance abuse. And it goes back to, you know,
addiction, addictive personalities and people that
are in the kink lifestyle aside from their own addictions.
You know, not all people have that struggle.
But even if you're in the lifestyle, I think that, you
know, Liv PO, we've all talked about this.
It's about self acceptance. And my husband told me that I
define people by their kinks. And I'm like that's I don't find
that complimentary. I said I don't define people by
their kinks. I define people for who they are
and what they are and what they bring to the table as an
individual. What can they offer people in
relationships? And I think that their kinks
don't define them. I think they make their kink and
their kink makes them in a sense, but it doesn't define
them as individuals. Just like your job, your
profession, it doesn't define you.
But I was telling him that my slave has a lot of resistance
and a lot of crossdressers that I have, you know, had in my
life. They have had resistance about
what they want and they hate the follow through a lot of times
with what they have to do in order to accomplish what they
truly want. My view of what I would love to
see for him is to be a 24/7 Sissy slave, but everyone has
the resistance to some point in what they want in their kink
lifestyle. You know, one of my slaves, he
talks about wanting to be confined and be in his padded
closet and you know, only have certain access to certain things
like food and capabilities of using the bathroom outside of
wearing a depend or wearing a catheter.
So ultimately, Tony, I think we define ourselves and what we
truly want to make ourselves happy.
And if you are unable to attain your level of happiness with
submission and what you truly want, then your life as a whole
will be less than and you won't find that complete happiness.
So on that, I will leave you those words, whether I'm right,
whether I'm wrong, you be the judge.
You have to decide for yourself what you want and what's truly
going to make you happy. Until then, thank you for
listening. Thank you again for all your
support. I truly appreciate all of my
fans and their loyalty and to devotion to the podcast.
So until then, this has been the latest episode of Call Me
Mistress.