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Hi, welcome to the latest 
episode of Call Me Mistress. 

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I'm your Hostess, Mistress Mia, 
and I've got my 2 little 

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partners here with me. 
I've got the Barbie. 

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Hi and I've got Liv. 
Hi. 

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No British accent today. 
Good morning. 

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Barbie, can you do the British 
accent good? 

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Morning, good. 
Morning. 

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I'm supposed to. 
You sound like hands on Gretel. 

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No. 
No, no, Pinocchio or something. 

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Who is that? 
No, the gingerbread. 

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Man, you sound like the 
gingerbread. 

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Oliver Twist, That's what I was 
thinking. 

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Oliver's Yeah, I was thinking, 
Oliver, please. 

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I don't not. 
My cum drop buttons. 

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Have. 
You seen that for sure. 

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I don't know what we're talking 
about. 

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All right, we're just going to 
go with Moe and Curly today are 

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the 2 Stooges. 
All right, bitches. 

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So let's get into the nitty 
gritty. 

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We're going to talk about some 
people today. 

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I like people. 
I. 

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Was going to say I. 
Don't. 

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Great. 
Let's talk about some of our 

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favorites or some of our worst 
experiences in the dungeon. 

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Let's do worst that's more fun. 
We've already talked about our 

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worst on here. 
You know what? 

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Not everybody remembers all of 
your words, you know, Because. 

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The worst for me is that this, 
this the shitter that took seven

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years off my life. 
That's. 

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Oh God, that's. 
Almost so bad that like, we'll 

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take half the podcast to explain
what happened. 

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That's so bad. 
About that one recently. 

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So bad. 
Yeah. 

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Yeah, that was. 
Truly horrific. 

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And the fact that my best friend
was there, I was like, Oh my 

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God, the first time I bring her 
to the dungeon and it's that I 

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was like, you know what? 
Not bringing my friends around 

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what I. 
Was going to say, why did you 

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want to torture your boyfriend? 
Mia, I did not know that was 

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going to happen. 
I didn't know it either, but you

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always expect the worst. 
I didn't. 

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I was like this will be cute and
fun. 

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It was. 
Not fun. 

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This girl's trauma bonding. 
It was not cute and fun. 

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It was horrific. 
It was. 

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It wasn't terrible. 
It was it was awful. 

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And he had so many rings in 
there. 

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They just kept oozing out. 
OK, so this goes back to men who

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don't do enemas, but see, I 
really think he wanted to shit 

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on you. 
He. 

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Didn't know he was purposely 
shitting, I swear to God. 

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I really think. 
Because I I've pegged my fair 

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share of men and you know, a 
little poop happens, but like, 

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shitting on the floor doesn't 
happen unless you try. 

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Yeah, no, Bree and I saw someone
and we always called him the 

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painter because he always came 
in white painter clothes. 

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But in actuality, he would 
always paint the shit out of the

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dungeon because, yeah, painting 
hasn't painted the shit. 

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It's an old expression. 
However, he would go and come 

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in, he would lay down, he would 
stroke his Dick when Bree would 

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fuck him in the ass. 
And the last time he was here, 

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she put this ginormous, you 
know, 12 inch Dick in his ass 

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and just started pounding the 
fuck out of him. 

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And it was not projectile. 
It was one solid. 

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Log Oh my God. 
And it came out. 

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Like and. 
Bree was about to throw the 

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fuck. 
Oh my gosh, it was. 

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An extra 6 inches on that Dick. 
But as he came is when his 

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ejaculated shit projected from 
his asshole at the same time. 

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It was like, yeah. 
It was a lot. 

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I, I actually, we were talking 
about this person before the 

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podcast started. 
We were talking about I took 

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from somebody else, the one you 
saw a few times. 

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I was seeing him and I was 
pegging him and he like really 

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wanted to use a strap on. 
I just couldn't find 1. 

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So I was like, I got to do it 
manually. 

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I got to do it and I had him on 
the Gurney and I was. 

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Picking him and. 
When we were done he stood up 

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and there was just like brown 
spots around on his butt and up 

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his back. 
I was like, now what in the 

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hell? 
Is that and. 

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He's getting dressed and I'm 
staring and I'm like, does he 

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have like moles? 
He needs to get checked out. 

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He had shit and it had gone up 
his back and he put on his 

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clothes. 
It's too late for me to say 

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anything. 
He was gone. 

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The clothes are on. 
And so he left and I looked at 

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the Gurney and I was like, I'm 
going to bleach the fuck out of 

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this. 
Thing 90s like if. 

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You're going to take something 
in your ass, Skip a meal, enema 

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douche. 
I don't know, take a shit before

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you come get fucked. 
It's really easy not to shit on 

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the. 
Table. 

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It's so easy not to shit on the 
table. 

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Almost every Horror Story is 
going to have to do with someone

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shitting on the table. 
Yes, without. 

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Like without permission. 
Yeah, totally. 

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Now, Liv, what do you think your
worst experience has been thus 

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far? 
She peed on my hand. 

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I haven't cut for a few moments.
All right, so Liv, tell us one 

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of your worst experiences thus 
far in the dungeon. 

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It's still going to be that guy 
with the piercing blue eyes. 

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Tell us. 
That he would just be like stare

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at me deeply in the eyes and 
breathe heavy. 

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I do that. 
I have piercing blue eyes. 

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Yeah, but it was crazy. 
It was. 

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Like kind of traumatic. 
I hated it. 

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And he came in twice and I was 
like, no. 

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And she didn't tell me it was 
me, the same guy. 

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So when I walked in, I was like,
oh. 

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Did Mia ever tell you about my 
very first like session in the 

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dungeon? 
It was a a man that she hadn't 

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seen before. 
And he came in, he had a 

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ponytail and an eye patch and he
came in and he definitely was 

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hoping we were hookers. 
Like Mia was talking to him and 

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he like come. 
And I was like, so like, it's my

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first time in the dungeon so I'm
like nervous. 

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So I'm like sitting on one side 
of him and Mia is like sitting 

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kind of facing him. 
And he was like, so is this like

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a happy ending? 
And he looked at me and Mia 

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went, no, I think he was like, 
oh, I see, Wink, wink. 

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And I was like, no, dude, we 
don't do that. 

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It's an. 
Unhappy ending, yeah. 

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And then he was like, we're 
like, So what are you into? 

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And he kept so he was like, I'm 
into sissification. 

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And we were like, cool. 
And we went to like go get some 

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pantyhose or a skirt. 
And he was like, what are you 

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doing? 
And we're like, you said you're 

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into sissification. 
He's like, no, just verbally. 

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And I was like, oh, so you don't
know what that means? 

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And then like, so we he 
basically just wants to be like 

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called a woman. 
It was weird. 

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And so he was so weird, they. 
Were like, you want to suck that

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Dick? 
He's like, yeah, but like not as

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a guy. 
And we were like, huh? 

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He's like, I'm not gay. 
And I was like, what? 

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And he's like, I just really 
like sucking Dick. 

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You have a Dick I can suck. 
And we're like, yeah, let us 

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pull down our head without our 
hard 8 inch cock for you. 

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So we ended up just like making 
him like suck on a dildo while 

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he jerks off and then he goes, 
can I watch porn? 

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We were like, yeah, sure. 
And then so Mia was like, what 

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do you want to watch? 
He knew the title of this like 

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porno by name. 
It was like bang, blow, like 

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group something. 
Yeah, blow, bang something. 

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And it was like the very 
specific handle of like the porn

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video. 
Yeah, let Let's describe the 

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blow. 
Bang. 

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Tell us. 
It was, it was like a bukaki, 

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kind of. 
It was like a girl in the middle

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sucking a bunch of Dicks. 
And I was like, I bet you wish 

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you were that girl, Han. 
He was like, yeah, I don't like 

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not. 
Gay, not gay. 

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He was like. 
He was like, I want to suck a 

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Dick, but as a woman sucking a 
man's Dick. 

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But I'm not a woman, I'm a man. 
And I was like, that's between 

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you and whoever you pray to. 
And you're I was. 

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Going to say you and your 
fucking mind. 

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In his mind he wanted to be a 
hot 25 year old chick sucking 

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Dick. 
Also he was really bad at 

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sucking Dick. 
Oh God, he was. 

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So I could. 
Feel the teeth through the 

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dildo. 
Damn. 

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I was like God, it was like 
sticking a dildo down a blender.

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I was like I was trying to dodge
the teeth, go back to the dildo.

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I did. 
I was expecting to pull it out 

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chunks. 
And then he came like a little 

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burst of like dust. 
It wasn't even Tom and he was 

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no, and I'm making fun of him 
because he was an asshole to me 

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and Mia. 
He was really fucking rude and 

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he's never been back. 
Yeah, that, that was an 

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interesting afternoon. 
It was so bad that Mia turned to

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me and went, I promise. 
Yeah. 

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I mean, it was like, I'm going 
to scare this girl. 

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Because you know, what people 
don't see from my point of view 

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is when people reach out to me 
via e-mail or via text, you 

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know, they'll describe some type
of, of session that they would 

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actually want. 
And it would consist of, hey, 

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you know, I'm into 
sissification. 

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This is what the guy told me. 
So, you know, sissification 

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again, is where a man wants to 
dress up as a woman. 

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Now, there's also forced 
feminization, same thing, but 

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we're doing it forcefully. 
Like, we know you want to dress 

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up like a Sissy whore. 
We know you want to put on 

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panties. 
Don't be such a fag. 

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You know, it's that kind of 
shit. 

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But this guy, you know, they 
give you this illusion of what 

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they really want. 
In actuality, they come in and 

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they're not what they want. 
You know, they think it's 

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something else. 
Yeah, go ahead. 

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And buy a hand job or something 
like that. 

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00:09:52,320 --> 00:09:53,480
But they want someone to jerk 
them. 

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Off. 
Yeah, no, we're not doing that. 

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No, we're too mean. 
Not nice enough you. 

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Can jerk them off with my 
sandpaper and lemon juice. 

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00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:05,520
Yeah, I did jerk a guy off with.
I took a goth spike choker 

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inwards around a Dick and he was
like, Mistress, can I fuck it? 

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And I was like, yeah, and he did
it. 

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So he did it. 
Himself. 

200
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I seen that guy. 
You saw that guy? 

201
00:10:15,360 --> 00:10:18,160
Yeah, that's my guy. 
Yeah, I said that I like was 

202
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that guy that she's talking 
about? 

203
00:10:19,440 --> 00:10:23,280
Yes, I see him again. 
But the best part when Barbie 

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did it? 
Oh. 

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I would not. 
I would. 

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00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:26,480
Are you sure it's the? 
Same guy. 

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00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:28,280
The guy that you got put the 
needle in his Dick, Yeah. 

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00:10:28,760 --> 00:10:30,360
That guy? 
Yeah, she has. 

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She has a weird view on what 
kind of men she likes. 

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OK. 
You both have really weird views

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00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:39,040
about what kind of men you like.
Yeah, I'm telling you, I do. 

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00:10:39,560 --> 00:10:42,000
Not have weird views. 
You kind of do. 

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00:10:44,440 --> 00:10:47,080
I feel like I have had sex with 
very attractive men in my. 

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Life. 
The last one I saw, yeah, that 

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motherfucker was. 
Yeah, that. 

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00:10:52,440 --> 00:10:53,520
Yeah. 
Yeah, he should. 

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00:10:53,720 --> 00:10:57,360
He should be in film, yeah. 
Maybe, yeah, he's like a Top Gun

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type of guy. 
I. 

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Think if we sweet talk him 
enough he would. 

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I think we could convince him to
come film. 

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00:11:02,560 --> 00:11:04,520
Something. 
Oh yeah, I'm sure. 

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00:11:05,240 --> 00:11:07,960
He's, you know, make sure he's. 
You know, like Ken Barbie in a 

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few days. 
Oh, yeah, Barbie and Ken, we, we

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actually went to a different sex
party together once. 

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And when he he had like paid my 
way in and I pulled up and they 

226
00:11:18,840 --> 00:11:21,040
were like, oh, you look like an 
actual Barbie. 

227
00:11:21,040 --> 00:11:24,520
And I was like, yeah, I do. 
And I got kids inside for you. 

228
00:11:25,360 --> 00:11:27,720
He doesn't go by kid, but he 
looks like a kid because we're 

229
00:11:27,720 --> 00:11:30,520
both blonde and we look stupid 
when we're out together. 

230
00:11:30,720 --> 00:11:32,640
I'm not going to lie. 
No, I don't. 

231
00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:34,960
No, you don't. 
Gosh. 

232
00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:37,760
He was a normal emasculated kid 
though. 

233
00:11:38,360 --> 00:11:41,920
He was in a spider man outfit so
I don't know. 

234
00:11:42,320 --> 00:11:44,320
It was a Halloween party so 
shit. 

235
00:11:44,560 --> 00:11:48,160
Did you see the ABS of steel and
his hot fucking man piece right 

236
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:49,640
there? 
I was seeing something in the 

237
00:11:49,640 --> 00:11:53,000
spandex suit. 
Let's just say he does not know 

238
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:57,120
what a dance belt is. 
Me. 

239
00:11:57,400 --> 00:12:01,240
Either. 
Tell him Barbie. 

240
00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:02,640
Oh, a dance belt? 
Like what? 

241
00:12:02,920 --> 00:12:06,200
Like the male ballet dancers 
wear under their tights so their

242
00:12:06,200 --> 00:12:10,120
decades swinging? 
Yeah, it's like a jock strap. 

243
00:12:10,400 --> 00:12:11,800
I'd rather that they'd be 
flopping. 

244
00:12:11,880 --> 00:12:16,880
You saw his. 
Like a jock strap is a dance 

245
00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:17,880
belt. 
It's a little bit live. 

246
00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:22,560
His band mate was there. 
For you, yeah, Liv says she want

247
00:12:22,560 --> 00:12:25,400
to see a floppin. 
And that's the fellow that 

248
00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:27,080
wouldn't fit in the penis tube, 
right? 

249
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:28,800
The penis. 
Pump He didn't fit in any of the

250
00:12:28,800 --> 00:12:29,760
cages either. 
Christ. 

251
00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:32,920
Yeah, when? 
Your Dick don't fit in a fucking

252
00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:35,200
penis pump. 
Yeah, you got a big fucking 

253
00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:35,960
Jack. 
Don't eat a pump. 

254
00:12:36,240 --> 00:12:38,200
You don't. 
You don't eat the pump. 

255
00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:39,160
You don't? 
Chill out brother. 

256
00:12:39,840 --> 00:12:41,320
You're going over his right 
shoulder. 

257
00:12:42,560 --> 00:12:44,720
Exactly. 
Your Dick and go, you said. 

258
00:12:46,160 --> 00:12:48,040
Those things don't come in 
white, so good for you. 

259
00:12:51,800 --> 00:12:55,120
Oh God, I'm still, I'm telling 
you what, the biggest Dick I've 

260
00:12:55,120 --> 00:12:59,080
ever seen was this guy and he 
was fucking disgusting. 

261
00:12:59,520 --> 00:13:02,520
And it was when I met him when I
was single and he fucking. 

262
00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:05,560
Pulled that shit out. 
From his jeans with two. 

263
00:13:05,560 --> 00:13:07,320
Ham like an omen. 
It was. 

264
00:13:07,360 --> 00:13:08,960
It was. 
Crazy, how long was? 

265
00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:10,120
It. 
Oh. 

266
00:13:10,400 --> 00:13:13,080
Probably 16 inches. 
It was fucking ginormous. 

267
00:13:13,160 --> 00:13:14,640
It was. 
Supposed to show me that 14. 

268
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,120
Oh, I'm going to show it. 
No, no, no. 

269
00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:18,360
It was 27. 
No, 26 inch Dick. 

270
00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:19,880
Yeah, I'm going to show it to 
you. 

271
00:13:20,680 --> 00:13:24,120
Yeah, I was on a date with a guy
and he like unrolled a 26 inch. 

272
00:13:24,240 --> 00:13:26,000
I would like freak out. 
I'd be. 

273
00:13:26,400 --> 00:13:28,560
Like, oh, it was beautiful. 
God, Glock it. 

274
00:13:28,960 --> 00:13:30,760
It was beautiful. 
Thank you. 

275
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,000
I clock. 
Out my vaginas off limits when 

276
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,000
they're that big. 
Hey, you pump your stomach with 

277
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,280
it. 
I don't want to put my stomach 

278
00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:39,280
with nothing. 
I mean you could take like 7 

279
00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:42,760
like at least some of it like. 
Liv, that's who we're going to 

280
00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:45,240
see if he wants to come in. 
The 26 inch. 

281
00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:48,360
Yes, I'm going to have him meet 
you when you're single now. 

282
00:13:48,640 --> 00:13:51,400
Wait, you know the 26 inch? 
I would fuck him. 

283
00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:53,200
I sucked his Dick. 
It was great. 

284
00:13:53,200 --> 00:13:55,680
Do what? 
Wait, you know the 26 inch Dick 

285
00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:58,280
guys when he comes in call me 
please. 

286
00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:00,040
Please, I have to see this 
monstrosity. 

287
00:14:00,200 --> 00:14:02,040
I'm going to show you a picture.
Let me get him a video. 

288
00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:03,640
Whenever it happens for. 
Me. 

289
00:14:03,680 --> 00:14:05,360
Oh fuck yeah, I want to video 
that shit. 

290
00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:06,560
Kind of. 
Car I chop it. 

291
00:14:06,640 --> 00:14:08,920
No, don't let me do that. 
No, it's beautiful. 

292
00:14:08,920 --> 00:14:10,880
You don't do that. 
What is wrong with you? 

293
00:14:10,880 --> 00:14:11,960
I don't. 
Know I like CDT. 

294
00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:14,040
I like CBT. 
Too. 

295
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:17,080
I love CBT. 
So back to we were talking about

296
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:20,280
the one that you both saw. 
The final part of the story was 

297
00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:22,800
he was bleeding and you were 
telling the story and you're 

298
00:14:22,800 --> 00:14:25,560
like, yeah, he was bleeding, but
it was none of my business. 

299
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:27,560
But it wasn't. 
When he came in to see me, he 

300
00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:29,680
was like, yeah, I didn't want 
that intense, you know, I wanted

301
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:31,000
to come in for a little bit more
sensual. 

302
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:33,160
That's why I came to see you, 
because he was like, it was 

303
00:14:33,160 --> 00:14:34,240
after you. 
He's like, I don't think I could

304
00:14:34,240 --> 00:14:36,880
do it again. 
What's crazy is that he told me 

305
00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:39,760
he wanted it and I started. 
Very sure at the time I'm saying

306
00:14:39,760 --> 00:14:41,560
when he wanted to come back, he 
didn't want it the same way. 

307
00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:44,400
Which is crazy because like, I 
am known for being a centralist.

308
00:14:44,640 --> 00:14:47,040
And so when he came in, he's 
like, I want it really soft. 

309
00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:49,240
And I was like, OK, and I 
started soft. 

310
00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:52,600
And it just like talking it up. 
Yeah, like, yeah, you just kept 

311
00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:54,640
getting into it. 
So I kept going. 

312
00:14:55,000 --> 00:14:58,760
And then afterwards he was like,
yeah, that wasn't very intense, 

313
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:00,400
was it? 
I think he's he was trying to 

314
00:15:00,400 --> 00:15:03,680
downplay it because with me he 
was like with that like middle 

315
00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,640
of the road. 
Or is that like pretty intense? 

316
00:15:05,680 --> 00:15:08,080
I was like, dude, you know, that
was intense. 

317
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:11,240
Like no he. 
Knew because we came in. 

318
00:15:11,240 --> 00:15:12,880
He was like, I didn't want to 
come in for something intense 

319
00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:14,920
like that again, not saying that
he didn't like what you did. 

320
00:15:14,920 --> 00:15:16,480
I was saying like he didn't want
to come back in for. 

321
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:20,120
It he visited prior. 
That he came in twice and man. 

322
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,640
I mean, before at all, he might 
have gone somewhere else and got

323
00:15:22,640 --> 00:15:24,160
something like, you know. 
The. 

324
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:27,680
Penis or spikes in the ass. 
You have no idea what people. 

325
00:15:28,040 --> 00:15:31,000
Are he wasn't like bleeding 
profusely but I think one of the

326
00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:33,400
spikes cut him a little. 
Bit there's the Dick right 

327
00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:36,000
there. 
That doesn't look like 26 

328
00:15:36,000 --> 00:15:37,280
inches. 
It's 26 inches. 

329
00:15:37,680 --> 00:15:38,680
That's not. 
It's not. 

330
00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:42,120
That's classic. 
Yes, that's not hard exactly 

331
00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:43,240
you. 
Could jump rope with that 

332
00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:46,080
talking. 
Thing what even? 

333
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,480
Happened. 
That has to be a condition pass 

334
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:51,880
pass out when he gets a boner. 
Yeah, that's why he actually had

335
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:53,920
a reduction. 
So all these guys are 

336
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,680
wheelchairs? 
Wait, the 26 inch is a reduced 

337
00:15:56,680 --> 00:15:58,440
size? 
It was, yeah. 

338
00:15:58,960 --> 00:16:01,640
He come along, but now. 
I would have to ask if I haven't

339
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:02,560
seen him in a long. 
Time. 

340
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:05,640
If it's doable, I'll do it. 
Fuck yeah, it's doable. 

341
00:16:06,080 --> 00:16:09,360
And what's adorable? 
My body, my heart is 26 inches 

342
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:10,480
from my vagina. 
I don't. 

343
00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:12,320
Want it's adorable poop my 
heart. 

344
00:16:12,480 --> 00:16:13,640
Look, look. 
How adorable. 

345
00:16:13,760 --> 00:16:15,840
He is OK. 
He's cute, he's. 

346
00:16:15,840 --> 00:16:17,400
Cute. 
He's like a little baby cute. 

347
00:16:17,440 --> 00:16:19,000
Yeah, he's baby cute. 
He's adorable. 

348
00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:22,120
Wiener. 
With a fucking Wiener. 

349
00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:25,040
Yes, all the difference. 
I'd fuck that little baby. 

350
00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:28,440
Yeah, I'll pull him up on 
Facebook and you show a recent 

351
00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:29,040
picture of. 
Him. 

352
00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:30,720
He's adorable. 
He's a full body pig. 

353
00:16:30,720 --> 00:16:32,160
Zoom in on the crotch will tell.
Oh. 

354
00:16:32,680 --> 00:16:34,520
My God, I want to zoom in on the
belly. 

355
00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:36,800
Because he's going to have a 
print no matter what he wears. 

356
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:39,360
That's what I'm saying. 
Like, is he like taping it to 

357
00:16:39,360 --> 00:16:41,440
his leg and just hoping that 
they don't notice? 

358
00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:43,040
If I had that, I would not tape 
it. 

359
00:16:43,160 --> 00:16:45,640
I would walk around wearing 
white pants and he's like. 

360
00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:47,680
He probably would be tired of 
it. 

361
00:16:47,880 --> 00:16:49,360
It probably scares a lot of 
girls. 

362
00:16:49,600 --> 00:16:51,560
Never mind. 
Fuck yeah, they're the ones that

363
00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:52,800
weren't. 
No. 

364
00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:53,560
What? 
You. 

365
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,680
He's adorable. 
No. 

366
00:16:56,760 --> 00:16:57,520
Because. 
He looks like a. 

367
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,000
Hobo in a suit. 
He's. 

368
00:16:59,040 --> 00:17:01,880
Not a hobo in a suit. 
He's adorable. 

369
00:17:02,360 --> 00:17:03,840
God, you're so mean. 
I'm sorry. 

370
00:17:04,920 --> 00:17:08,640
My. 
Gosh, no problem, he might 

371
00:17:08,640 --> 00:17:10,240
listen to this. 
I'm not saying shit. 

372
00:17:12,839 --> 00:17:14,920
Look, he looks cleaned up there.
He looks good. 

373
00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:17,839
He's got a nice clean beard. 
You. 

374
00:17:17,839 --> 00:17:21,319
Forget what you were married to.
OK, I'm not married to him no 

375
00:17:21,319 --> 00:17:24,839
more. 
Look, we all make a mistake. 

376
00:17:24,839 --> 00:17:25,440
He's. 
Four people. 

377
00:17:25,839 --> 00:17:30,280
He cleans up this one. 
Yeah. 3 1/2 I love it. 

378
00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:31,640
Yeah, there's. 
People in this room, we have 4 

379
00:17:31,640 --> 00:17:33,240
this week. 
Don't make a there's. 

380
00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:34,960
A lot of. 
People I. 

381
00:17:35,840 --> 00:17:43,160
Feel attacked? 
Got a little y'all, can't see it

382
00:17:43,160 --> 00:17:45,080
but we got a foot rub station 
going on in here. 

383
00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:50,320
I forgot we were recording. 
This is go round and round and 

384
00:17:50,320 --> 00:17:51,120
round. 
Here we go. 

385
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:54,800
This this podcast is definitely 
more conversational than our 

386
00:17:54,800 --> 00:17:57,760
usual ones. 
And this is where we need a. 

387
00:17:58,400 --> 00:18:00,880
Piece. 
Whose penis cast is at I? 

388
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,400
Guess is Barbies. 
No, it was. 

389
00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:07,320
It was a gentleman that it was a
gentleman that came to the party

390
00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:10,600
several years ago and his mother
was here at the same party. 

391
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:13,680
Oh, yeah. 
And I had to say, hey, your mom 

392
00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:15,920
is here. 
And he's like, I know she's 

393
00:18:15,920 --> 00:18:17,280
inside. 
I'll stay outside. 

394
00:18:18,120 --> 00:18:19,280
Did they both know each other 
was? 

395
00:18:19,280 --> 00:18:21,360
There no. 
I had to fucking leave. 

396
00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:23,920
I'd leave. 
I would run a Actually if my mom

397
00:18:23,920 --> 00:18:25,440
showed up here, I'd think she 
was stuck. 

398
00:18:25,720 --> 00:18:29,880
Oh lawyer you stayed low on. 
You're right. 

399
00:18:29,960 --> 00:18:32,960
Make my mom leave. 
I was gonna say this one here is

400
00:18:32,960 --> 00:18:35,640
always telling me, you know, I 
wish my mom would like follow me

401
00:18:35,640 --> 00:18:38,840
here one day so I can like lure 
her into the dungeon so you can 

402
00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:47,600
beat the shit out of. 
That kind of thing, that's not 

403
00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:50,600
media, no. 
We're talking about getting 

404
00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:56,560
jumped. 
We're talking about a holiday. 

405
00:18:57,760 --> 00:19:03,600
No, I'm not talking about shit. 
Yeah, I fell down at the party 

406
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:05,400
and I still have a knot on my 
leg from. 

407
00:19:05,400 --> 00:19:08,880
That party was so fun. 
Well, you brought your entourage

408
00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:11,920
with you and they were fun 
people, but they, I don't know, 

409
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:15,640
it's just to me, it just was 
there was a vibe that I just. 

410
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:17,720
I wasn't getting a house party 
vibe. 

411
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:21,480
Like it wasn't giving like how 
it's like gay before. 

412
00:19:21,480 --> 00:19:24,960
Like usually like you come in 
and you're like sex party kinky.

413
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:26,640
Like there's cool stuff like 
this one. 

414
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:30,320
There's cool stuff happening, 
but it wasn't as like fantasy as

415
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:32,960
it used like as it as it has 
been before. 

416
00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:36,000
Yeah, this one was like really 
like social. 

417
00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:38,640
It's just this podcast just mean
you defending ourselves from 

418
00:19:38,680 --> 00:19:41,760
them. 
They sat us down. 

419
00:19:41,760 --> 00:19:43,640
They've done nothing but berate 
us. 

420
00:19:45,280 --> 00:19:48,280
And you all lured Charles in, so
it's more or less. 

421
00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:50,000
Synergy is really nice for the 
room. 

422
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:51,760
I I agree. 
I agree. 

423
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:54,240
He's a ray of sunshine. 
Yeah. 

424
00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:55,600
Yeah, I got you. 
I literally. 

425
00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,440
He's like a lamp with some good 
aura, Yeah. 

426
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,800
It's shining off your head. 
He. 

427
00:20:04,920 --> 00:20:07,880
Shining off your head. 
Alright, right now. 

428
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:11,280
So go back to this. 
So what has been your best 

429
00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:13,720
experiences in the tangent? 
I like to speak. 

430
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:15,840
Jesus. 
Where I got to stick the needle 

431
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:18,160
in his Dick and he said Mistress
can I fuck it? 

432
00:20:18,360 --> 00:20:19,920
OK. 
So that was your favorite him 

433
00:20:19,960 --> 00:20:20,960
again? 
OK. 

434
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:23,520
It's gonna be me and you're not 
really sorry. 

435
00:20:24,480 --> 00:20:26,680
I'm really bad with me and Liv 
are going to be fighting over 

436
00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,160
that guy. 
Oh yeah, a puppy Yeah, I'm 

437
00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:31,120
fighting for. 
It he's not, he wasn't a puppy 

438
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:33,360
when I saw him. 
No, he was a puppy for her. 

439
00:20:33,640 --> 00:20:35,960
Yeah, he was a puppy. 
He's done like one or two 

440
00:20:35,960 --> 00:20:37,200
sessions. 
And he was like a power 

441
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:38,360
struggle. 
It was nice. 

442
00:20:38,680 --> 00:20:39,680
Oh. 
I know. 

443
00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:41,880
It was the same guy because he 
talked about you the whole time.

444
00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:44,080
Yeah. 
Because he told me he loved me. 

445
00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:46,920
He loved me. 
Too. 

446
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:48,960
My gosh. 
Because he was like, did you 

447
00:20:48,960 --> 00:20:49,680
ever fuck a guy? 
Look at me. 

448
00:20:49,680 --> 00:20:51,800
And I said no. 
Oh my Lord. 

449
00:20:53,680 --> 00:20:56,560
TuneIn next time to mistress me 
as podcast. 

450
00:20:56,560 --> 00:20:58,040
Exactly. 
Next time we'll have a topic. 

451
00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:00,480
I don't know, We'll sing and 
we'll give it a whirl. 

452
00:21:00,600 --> 00:21:03,440
Anywho, all right, so this has 
been the latest episode of. 

453
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:05,800
Call me Mistress. 
Barbie. 

454
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:07,920
Call me Mistress. 
There we go. 

455
00:21:08,120 --> 00:21:08,640
You say it better.
