1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:03,200 I'm glad he's kind of rolling with the evolution here. 2 00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:06,720 It's important he doesn't. Really have a choice so. 3 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:11,080 Well, welcome to cuckoldry. Hey, you know he created the 4 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:21,720 monster 10 years ago. Hey everybody. 5 00:00:21,720 --> 00:00:23,880 I just wanted to give you a quick notice. 6 00:00:24,320 --> 00:00:27,560 I am starting to offer a one-on-one coaching session. 7 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:32,360 It's called Ask Crystal. It is coaching for individuals 8 00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:36,440 and couples as they explore ethical non monogamy, whatever 9 00:00:36,440 --> 00:00:39,520 your dynamic is. I've been living in this dynamic 10 00:00:39,520 --> 00:00:44,040 for 10 ton and I hope to share some of that wisdom with you in 11 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:47,640 the hopes that it will help you. So you'll get the details in the 12 00:00:47,640 --> 00:00:49,400 show notes and I hope to see you there. 13 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:54,800 Hello and good afternoon. This is Crystal Welch here and I 14 00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:58,440 am super, super excited. I've been trying to get this 15 00:00:58,440 --> 00:01:03,720 guest for for she's she's become a good friend and I'll tell you 16 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:05,880 quickly how we met. And then I'm gonna have her give 17 00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:09,000 you her story. She's called Blonde by the Bay 18 00:01:09,160 --> 00:01:12,600 and she is blonde Blonde on the Bay. 19 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,800 Why did I think it was by. OK, well all right. 20 00:01:14,800 --> 00:01:17,600 See, see, I'm. I'm off base right, right away. 21 00:01:19,280 --> 00:01:23,960 But we met social media and we started chatting and then they 22 00:01:23,960 --> 00:01:27,120 don't live terribly far from us and so we thought well wouldn't 23 00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:29,680 it be fun we'll just invite him down for New Year's. 24 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:31,600 We were going to go to a New Year's event and it would just 25 00:01:31,600 --> 00:01:36,600 be fun to have somebody else to go with and and and so they and 26 00:01:36,600 --> 00:01:39,080 so we were lucky they came down and stayed a couple days with us 27 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:44,600 and and he had a boyfriend at that time and so I'm going to 28 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:49,240 have her tell you that story but she's this drop dead gorgeous 29 00:01:49,760 --> 00:01:52,760 tall statuesque blonde. Oh my. 30 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:57,520 Gosh, man, killer and and so Blondie, take it away. 31 00:01:57,840 --> 00:02:03,040 OK, well, thank you, Crystal. I did have a boyfriend for about 32 00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:05,800 almost five years. He was a great guy. 33 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:10,800 And then when I sort of discovered cuckolding dynamic 34 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:14,240 more, I think our our relationship changed. 35 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:17,840 He wasn't maybe ready for what my husband and I were ready for. 36 00:02:18,600 --> 00:02:23,440 So New Year's be a bit of a bit of a gong show, didn't it? 37 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:27,000 Yes it did. Yeah, he, I think he got cold 38 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:31,920 feet and he, you know, when we went back to the room after the 39 00:02:31,920 --> 00:02:36,240 party, which was all great, and I was ready to go, he decided to 40 00:02:36,240 --> 00:02:39,440 go for a walk. Basically just left me hanging 41 00:02:41,080 --> 00:02:43,400 at that point. I mean, who does that? 42 00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:47,800 Here's this gorgeous blonde all get down for nude naked saying 43 00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:50,440 come on baby, and he he goes for a walk. 44 00:02:50,480 --> 00:02:51,600 Are you kidding me? No. 45 00:02:52,080 --> 00:02:55,800 So basically our, yeah, our relationship, our, yeah, ended 46 00:02:55,800 --> 00:03:01,400 that moment kind of thing. We do talk, we're on, we, you 47 00:03:01,400 --> 00:03:03,560 know, I don't want to have anybody upset with me or I don't 48 00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:07,600 want to be angry with anybody. So we are friendly but we don't 49 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:11,360 play. So that's one really good lesson 50 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:13,040 for all of you listeners out there. 51 00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:19,720 If you are a cuck or an aspiring cuck and you have a beautiful 52 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:27,240 woman that's ready to engage, do not leave her hanging and go out 53 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:30,880 and bar hop or whatever the heck he did, Whatever it is that he 54 00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:34,160 did, that is such a fatal error. So he blew it. 55 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:35,920 Man. Did he ever? 56 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:37,240 Did he ever? And. 57 00:03:37,600 --> 00:03:39,760 He was a nice guy, but I don't. I don't get it. 58 00:03:39,760 --> 00:03:41,840 I just so. Yeah. 59 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:45,560 I've evolved kind of in a different way than you have 60 00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:50,280 because we've evolved more toward wanting a like more of a 61 00:03:50,280 --> 00:03:54,920 Poly relationship and a longer term connection with somebody. 62 00:03:55,320 --> 00:03:58,320 And you kind of, you know, after that you took a right turn and 63 00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:02,720 you've kind of gone in another direction how you how you see 64 00:04:02,720 --> 00:04:08,880 your dynamic now, what you have found joy in what you see in the 65 00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:11,720 foreseeable future and how it's working out for you. 66 00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:13,760 Oh. OK, that's a lot. 67 00:04:13,760 --> 00:04:14,600 That's a. Lot. 68 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,839 That's a lot, yeah. That's OK. 69 00:04:17,560 --> 00:04:18,920 OK. Our dynamic, well, we've 70 00:04:18,920 --> 00:04:23,680 definitely moved into dynamic. We are not Stag Dixon or 71 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:26,480 anything like that. My husband doesn't have any 72 00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:31,800 involvement in me connecting with the gentleman that I choose 73 00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:35,400 to spend time with. He doesn't go on the sites, 74 00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:38,320 things like that. I do all of our communication 75 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:41,480 because I'm the one who's playing easier on our 76 00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:43,720 relationship. It's taken a lot of the stress 77 00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:47,240 off of it for him and I like doing it. 78 00:04:47,240 --> 00:04:50,240 I'm a communicator and I love chatting with people and getting 79 00:04:50,240 --> 00:04:54,200 to know people, so it's worked out really well for us in that 80 00:04:54,200 --> 00:04:56,800 terms. We do love going to events. 81 00:04:56,800 --> 00:04:59,520 We go to Splash, Mocha, absolutely love it there. 82 00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:04,680 We've met people really connected with couples and guys 83 00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:08,960 it it's been life changing for us in in that And then I'm I've 84 00:05:08,960 --> 00:05:11,880 made a much, I have a much bigger presence on social media 85 00:05:11,880 --> 00:05:14,600 now. I'm dabbling in content 86 00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:18,840 creating. So that's being fun and 87 00:05:18,840 --> 00:05:23,320 basically, yeah, it's just all being and I'm much even. 88 00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:26,280 My mum has commented that I am a very different person than I was 89 00:05:26,280 --> 00:05:28,840 a few years ago. I have a much stronger 90 00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:32,200 personality. I am more confident. 91 00:05:32,200 --> 00:05:36,440 I mean, two years ago I would have been terrified to sit and 92 00:05:36,440 --> 00:05:39,520 chat with you and you're one of my closest friends, so. 93 00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:43,840 Remember, I remember asking you back then if you would, because 94 00:05:43,840 --> 00:05:46,480 that's before I shut everything down and I was podcasting on a 95 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:51,040 more regular basis. And I too can say the same 96 00:05:51,040 --> 00:05:52,720 thing. Just from the time that I met 97 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:56,800 you to to just wash watch you blossom like a flower. 98 00:05:57,360 --> 00:05:59,640 You. I remember you were insecure. 99 00:05:59,640 --> 00:06:01,480 You didn't. You didn't. 100 00:06:01,800 --> 00:06:05,400 You know you were you you were questioning about your own you 101 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:09,720 know how other people would perceive you and all sorts of 102 00:06:09,720 --> 00:06:12,600 things nefarious things that women get inundated with 103 00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:18,200 especially as we get older and man you have come into your own 104 00:06:18,200 --> 00:06:22,640 and it's so good to see because it's like literally like 105 00:06:22,640 --> 00:06:26,320 blossoming like a flower to me. I've I've seen you be confident 106 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:32,280 you're friendly you you seem happy you seem you know and and 107 00:06:32,280 --> 00:06:34,520 your husband is a lot like mine in that they. 108 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:38,560 I mean mine doesn't participate in any social media so if 109 00:06:38,560 --> 00:06:42,440 there's any if there's he had it's up to me and I'm. 110 00:06:42,640 --> 00:06:45,240 I don't spend that much time on it, but you've really picked up 111 00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:50,440 the ball and and tell us about how how your husband is working 112 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:52,320 with all of this too. Is he? 113 00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:57,960 Is he as blossomy as you are? I don't think as Blossomy, he's 114 00:06:57,960 --> 00:07:01,640 a bit more rooted, yeah. OK, we need that. 115 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:03,000 We need that. We do, we do. 116 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:06,680 He is my my biggest supporter, my biggest fan. 117 00:07:06,920 --> 00:07:09,560 He he truly is. He's he's wonderful very 118 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:13,480 supportive you know he he does make comments like well you're 119 00:07:13,600 --> 00:07:15,240 you know I think you're on your phone a lot. 120 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:19,080 I'm like well I'm having fun and I'm reaching out and maybe I'll 121 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:24,800 be bringing in a little money be complete paying for these trips 122 00:07:24,800 --> 00:07:28,160 we want to go on. So no he he's good he's he's 123 00:07:28,160 --> 00:07:32,160 very very supportive He he prefers to take a back seat not 124 00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:34,040 be in the in the limelight kind of thing. 125 00:07:34,040 --> 00:07:38,240 He's you know but otherwise no we're we're really happy. 126 00:07:38,240 --> 00:07:40,040 I mean, we're planning our retirement next year too. 127 00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:46,160 I, and I want to hear some more details about that, but I will 128 00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:50,000 say too, because we've met him, he is the most delightful man, 129 00:07:50,240 --> 00:07:53,120 just thoroughly, thoroughly enjoyed spending time with both 130 00:07:53,120 --> 00:07:56,080 of you and and I. We love our time with you guys. 131 00:07:56,200 --> 00:07:59,320 I'm glad he's kind of rolling with the evolution here. 132 00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:02,840 He doesn't really have a choice, so. 133 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:07,200 Well, welcome to cuckoldry. Hey, you know he created the 134 00:08:07,200 --> 00:08:09,560 monster 10 years ago. Yeah, there you go. 135 00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:11,720 Now you guys started out as swingers, right? 136 00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:16,160 Yeah well Sword, we like our very first experience was a a 137 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:21,600 greedy girl party like hot wife, hot wife experience where ratio 138 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,760 of two to two men to every woman. 139 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:28,280 The club that we went to for the very first time and he begged me 140 00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:31,720 for two years to get into this lifestyle and I was just not 141 00:08:31,720 --> 00:08:35,080 having any of it And then we went there and then I was like, 142 00:08:35,080 --> 00:08:42,559 OK, when we come back. That is such AI hear all the so 143 00:08:42,559 --> 00:08:48,440 so so many men think about it, fantasize about it, wish their 144 00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:53,000 wives would consider it, and and I'd probably get more more 145 00:08:53,480 --> 00:08:55,120 communication from guys like that. 146 00:08:55,120 --> 00:08:58,080 How do I get my wife to do it kind of things than any other 147 00:08:58,080 --> 00:09:02,080 thing. So anyway, the person to consult 148 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:05,360 with, Probably for for those men, but I get a lot. 149 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:09,000 I get a lot of those emails. What not tell us just because it 150 00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:12,360 would be informative to to that particular segment of the 151 00:09:12,360 --> 00:09:15,040 audience. What do you think? 152 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:17,760 How did I mean? I'm talking about just your 153 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:22,880 communication with your husband, Catalyst that you started to 154 00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:24,720 say, oh, maybe I'll consider this. 155 00:09:25,080 --> 00:09:26,920 It probably had to be something that he said. 156 00:09:26,920 --> 00:09:30,040 Or was it just the consistency of the asking? 157 00:09:31,520 --> 00:09:37,720 Well, yeah, he literally wore me down and he he put me on Kik 158 00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:45,000 Friends an app, and he put out an ad on Kik Friends with a 159 00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:49,000 picture of me, I guess, and just said my wife doesn't think she's 160 00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:50,680 hot. Do you want to? 161 00:09:50,760 --> 00:09:53,680 Who wants to chat with her and change her mind kind of thing. 162 00:09:54,280 --> 00:09:58,680 And all of a sudden I was juggling 30-40 different 163 00:09:58,680 --> 00:10:00,000 conversations with men all over the. 164 00:10:01,080 --> 00:10:06,280 Have you seen you? I was not a believer. 165 00:10:07,600 --> 00:10:09,840 Well, you better be now, girlfriend, 'cause I told you, I 166 00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:13,560 told you, I told you. So, yeah, I, you know, like I 167 00:10:13,560 --> 00:10:14,840 said earlier, I'm a communicator. 168 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:18,120 I love to talk to people. And so that's how it started for 169 00:10:18,120 --> 00:10:24,440 basically from 2014 until we went to the party in September, 170 00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:27,160 I was just juggling all these conversations and talking to all 171 00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:30,520 these guys all over the world. You know, I got into sending 172 00:10:30,520 --> 00:10:31,960 nudes. There's pictures of me all over 173 00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:35,360 the world and the Internet, it's you, you know, it just is what 174 00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:39,120 it is now. And yeah, I was like, after 175 00:10:39,120 --> 00:10:42,200 talking to all these guys, like, oh, you should do it, You should 176 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,800 go, You're so pretty and blah, blah, blah. 177 00:10:44,320 --> 00:10:48,160 So I'm like, OK, I'll go, we'll go because I can prove you 178 00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:50,040 wrong, that nobody's going to want me. 179 00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:56,160 Man, And then she And then she unleashed the Kraken, and the 180 00:10:56,160 --> 00:11:02,000 world has never been the same. That's for damn. 181 00:11:02,240 --> 00:11:06,760 Sure, that's for sure. And your husband goes, man, I 182 00:11:06,760 --> 00:11:08,640 did not know I was gonna grade all of that. 183 00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:11,120 No. He did not know what he was in 184 00:11:11,120 --> 00:11:13,240 for. So here's another really 185 00:11:13,240 --> 00:11:16,520 interesting aspect I think of the relationship that you have 186 00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:21,920 with with your family and stuff. You're pretty your lifestyle 187 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:25,000 more than I think more than almost anybody that I know. 188 00:11:25,480 --> 00:11:29,680 We we're not out to our our closest like personal non 189 00:11:29,680 --> 00:11:33,080 lifestyle friends here in in my city. 190 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,840 It's just a very very few people it's it's really only our 191 00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:38,680 lifestyle friends that kind of know what we're up to. 192 00:11:38,680 --> 00:11:43,400 So tell that how that how you made that decision. 193 00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:47,120 Have you had any pushback how you how you've been juggling 194 00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:51,960 just being out a cuckold couple or a swinger couple or a 195 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:55,960 consensually non monogamous couple of any type to be have 196 00:11:56,240 --> 00:11:59,760 have enough confidence to be out to your friends and your family? 197 00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:05,080 I I think the driving force for me was I I I hate secrets and I 198 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:09,680 hate lying and getting caught up in who we told what to and what 199 00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:14,320 story was, did we tell the kids. And it was just too much. 200 00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:17,600 I couldn't take it and I wasn't ashamed of what I was doing. 201 00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:21,600 I was proud. So I think the we told was my 202 00:12:21,600 --> 00:12:27,920 mum and that was in 2015, right? Within a year of us getting into 203 00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:29,760 the lifestyle. And we just told her that we 204 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:32,280 were swingers and that's pretty much what everybody thinks. 205 00:12:33,160 --> 00:12:35,800 We don't really have vanilla friends. 206 00:12:36,600 --> 00:12:40,040 If we any vanilla friends that we do have, they know about our 207 00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:45,120 our, our lifestyle. Anybody who's given us pushback 208 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:51,560 or we, I think we've only lost two or three people in our lives 209 00:12:51,920 --> 00:12:54,320 who are friends. And I don't want to be friends 210 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:56,080 with people who are judgy anyway. 211 00:12:56,080 --> 00:12:58,600 I'm not a judgmental person and I don't want people like that in 212 00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:02,840 my life. Everything and everybody. 213 00:13:03,120 --> 00:13:04,960 And we've raised our kids that way too. 214 00:13:05,680 --> 00:13:08,400 And we we have come out to the kids. 215 00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:12,800 That just happened in September. And it was interesting because 216 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:15,840 we went back to Atlanta in March just recently. 217 00:13:16,400 --> 00:13:19,640 And last year when we went to Atlanta, we told the kids that 218 00:13:19,640 --> 00:13:22,800 we had needed to use. So we thought we'd go somewhere. 219 00:13:22,800 --> 00:13:28,280 We're never going to go again. And so this March rolled around 220 00:13:28,920 --> 00:13:31,320 and we're just like, oh, well, we're going on vacation. 221 00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:33,200 Where are you going? Atlanta what? 222 00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:35,160 Where are you going back to Atlanta for? 223 00:13:36,520 --> 00:13:38,760 And I said, well, you know, it's kind of like a reunion 224 00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:41,360 convention. And they're just, that's it. 225 00:13:41,360 --> 00:13:43,960 We don't need to know anymore. Go have fun, yeah. 226 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:47,000 It's the covering up, the lie thing that starts right there 227 00:13:47,000 --> 00:13:49,920 and you gotta you gotta unravel it and then keep unraveling it. 228 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:51,520 But now I don't have to tell lies anymore. 229 00:13:51,800 --> 00:13:52,840 You. Know we don't. 230 00:13:53,160 --> 00:13:55,760 We're we don't put it in their face like we're we're going down 231 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:59,720 to Seattle for a party next weekend and the kids just think 232 00:13:59,720 --> 00:14:02,480 you know we're shopping. They don't need to know that 233 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:07,920 we're going to a game Bay. You know once you know, somebody 234 00:14:07,920 --> 00:14:11,040 said to me once you once you know something you cannot unknow 235 00:14:11,040 --> 00:14:13,360 it. Yeah, And my daughter, my 236 00:14:13,360 --> 00:14:15,920 daughter has said, you know, mom, sometimes I wish we did 237 00:14:15,920 --> 00:14:19,320 have secrets in our family. And I said, I know it's 238 00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:24,680 uncomfortable, but we don't have secrets and that's what makes 239 00:14:24,680 --> 00:14:28,520 our family so strong. Well and I, we just admire you 240 00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:33,000 so much and I think I think that's the defining line between 241 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:38,440 being open and honest and and protecting other people from 242 00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,040 stuff that would possibly hurt them. 243 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:45,200 You've that's what I have you know that was my position when I 244 00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:48,080 said I'm not going to talk to our friends. 245 00:14:48,320 --> 00:14:51,360 You know like my ex business partner and people that we have. 246 00:14:51,880 --> 00:14:54,680 You know, we have long established friendships with 247 00:14:54,840 --> 00:14:59,000 here that would be mortified, I think, if they if they knew what 248 00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:02,600 we did in our private life, what it does to people that don't 249 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:06,320 need to know, it burdens them. It's a burden for them. 250 00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:08,880 That's right, because then they have to think, well, should I 251 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:10,120 treat them differently? Do I? 252 00:15:10,640 --> 00:15:14,720 You know, and I don't want to risk the the few really close 253 00:15:14,720 --> 00:15:17,400 friendships that we have because there's no need for them to 254 00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:18,960 know. There's no need for it. 255 00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:23,240 There's no need for it. That's kind of how we cut the 256 00:15:23,240 --> 00:15:25,800 defining line is it's it's not a need to know. 257 00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,960 If they ask us, we're gonna tell them the truth. 258 00:15:28,360 --> 00:15:30,160 Yeah, well, that's me too, if you ask me. 259 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:35,120 You know, yeah, I'm such a I'm such a ridiculous, open book 260 00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:38,440 that if you just ask me how my day was, I'm probably gonna 261 00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:41,240 pepper it with lifestyle stuff, it's. 262 00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:43,040 Just 'cause that's what you're doing during the day. 263 00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:48,040 And I have no filter, so I just say what comes into my mind is 264 00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:51,840 sometimes the thinking about it. And all of our friends know 265 00:15:52,880 --> 00:15:55,360 about our lifestyle. I think it's it's really 266 00:15:55,360 --> 00:15:58,520 admirable and I just admire you so much and to to see this 267 00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:01,720 journey in such a short period of time, years where you were 268 00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:05,600 kind of this shy, I don't know about anything thing to like. 269 00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:08,880 I am here, I am out and I am proud. 270 00:16:09,240 --> 00:16:10,640 I mean, it's. I'm proud of you. 271 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:12,520 I'm really proud of you. Really proud. 272 00:16:12,520 --> 00:16:14,320 Of you. Yeah, really proud of you. 273 00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:19,320 So tell us about your your retirement plans, what you're 274 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:23,360 planning to do. I think they should know about 275 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:29,520 your anniversary party. OK, well, we'll start with the 276 00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:33,320 anniversary party. Yes, we are hosting a party in 277 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:36,400 Las Vegas, invite only unfortunately. 278 00:16:36,400 --> 00:16:42,200 Sorry everybody, but I have invited to join us and we've 279 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:48,440 rented a house with a big grotto cave and we'll be having a vow 280 00:16:48,440 --> 00:16:52,600 renewal because it's our 30th anniversary and so we'll have 281 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:57,360 little mock vowel renewal and then I will fuck all the guys 282 00:16:57,360 --> 00:17:01,800 except for him, my husband I. Love that. 283 00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:03,160 I know. I love it too. 284 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:05,079 I mean, it's the best of both worlds really. 285 00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:07,760 It is. Win, win, win for me. 286 00:17:07,760 --> 00:17:10,200 That's right. And This is why we say, you 287 00:17:10,200 --> 00:17:13,880 know, for for women who embrace this lifestyle, it is in fact 288 00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:16,240 the cake and eat it too lifestyle, you know? 289 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:21,280 And Blondie is showing us exactly how, how That's so, so 290 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:23,800 much fun. And then now tell us about what 291 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:26,079 you, what you guys are talking about when you're you're 292 00:17:26,079 --> 00:17:28,319 retiring, You know, like a year or something. 293 00:17:28,359 --> 00:17:30,520 Yeah. Probably you'll be we'll be 294 00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:34,360 selling the house this time next year we hope, and living full 295 00:17:34,360 --> 00:17:39,760 time in our truck and camper. We'll be upgrading that, but 296 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:43,880 going all over North America and Canada and United States, 297 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:47,040 visiting lifestyle friends, going to events. 298 00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:51,920 Things like that. Just having fun and then we'll 299 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:57,000 use my parents property in BC here as a home base and see the 300 00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:59,600 kids and and stuff. But really, for the next, 301 00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:03,160 hopefully we'll be out and about traveling around. 302 00:18:03,840 --> 00:18:07,480 Boy, boy, I'm going to want to talk to you through that journey 303 00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:10,320 too, because you will. That's that's amazing. 304 00:18:10,320 --> 00:18:14,160 That's amazing that you're that you're dedicated enough to the 305 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:17,600 lifestyle that you're gonna say this is what we enjoy, This is 306 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:22,520 what we wanna do. We have the means to do it and 307 00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,800 we're going for what we love. And good, good for you. 308 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:28,360 Good for you. That's really, that's fun. 309 00:18:28,840 --> 00:18:32,160 You you are just a you are a bucket of fun all the way 310 00:18:32,160 --> 00:18:33,200 around. That's all I know. 311 00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:36,240 For real sure. You know, yes you do. 312 00:18:38,360 --> 00:18:44,960 So what would you someone brand new trying to get into the 313 00:18:44,960 --> 00:18:50,960 lifestyle, or maybe dipping their toe in and not quite sure 314 00:18:50,960 --> 00:18:54,000 how to navigate? How would you how would you 315 00:18:54,000 --> 00:19:02,000 advise them to proceed a so they don't damage their primary and B 316 00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:06,080 that you can enter into a whole other realm that neither person 317 00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:09,840 really knows about? How how would you advise them to 318 00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:12,960 walk into that? Well, I would definitely say 319 00:19:12,960 --> 00:19:16,160 open communication between you and your partner is critical. 320 00:19:16,160 --> 00:19:22,680 I've seen couples who are new passion burn because they aren't 321 00:19:22,680 --> 00:19:24,520 communicating. When one of them catches 322 00:19:24,520 --> 00:19:26,280 feelings for somebody, it happens. 323 00:19:26,280 --> 00:19:32,360 We get crushes on people and start being secretive and you 324 00:19:32,360 --> 00:19:36,000 know it's a marriage destroyer. If you can't communicate with 325 00:19:36,000 --> 00:19:41,960 each other and be completely and totally honest, the lifestyle 326 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:46,080 isn't there to make a a rocky marriage better. 327 00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:49,520 It's not going to. It'll find all the flaws. 328 00:19:50,480 --> 00:19:54,040 So really be secure. Really know that you have a 329 00:19:54,040 --> 00:20:02,320 solid marriage and only do you feel comfortable doing. 330 00:20:03,040 --> 00:20:06,120 Don't try and push the envelope. Don't try and Oh well, this is 331 00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:07,800 what she's doing. I should be doing that. 332 00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:09,600 No, you shouldn't. You should be doing exactly what 333 00:20:09,600 --> 00:20:14,440 you were doing. Only what you're doing and you 334 00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:16,680 know as long as you're both having fun and you're not 335 00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:19,600 hurting each other or hurting anybody else, then you're not 336 00:20:19,600 --> 00:20:21,720 doing it. There isn't. 337 00:20:22,000 --> 00:20:26,880 The only wrong way to do it is to be causing hurt and pain that 338 00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:28,560 isn't wanted. You're right, right. 339 00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:32,040 Well, that is that is a lot of really solid advice right there. 340 00:20:32,360 --> 00:20:35,320 And I said I said much the same along the way. 341 00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:38,600 So let me let me throw this at you. 342 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:43,160 Let's say that some weird thing happened and all of a sudden 343 00:20:43,520 --> 00:20:46,640 your husband would say, you know what, I'm not sure I want to do 344 00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:50,640 this anymore. Or what happens if you said that 345 00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:52,720 I I'm not sure I want to do this anymore. 346 00:20:53,320 --> 00:20:55,680 How would you guys navigate that? 347 00:20:56,800 --> 00:21:02,160 Well, you know, I think I kind of always some sort of a role in 348 00:21:02,160 --> 00:21:04,920 the lifestyle. I don't see my my life ever 349 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:10,880 being vanilla. If I get tired or too old or I 350 00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:13,120 get sick, I mean, who knows? God knows what happens. 351 00:21:13,120 --> 00:21:15,800 In the future, right? If something happens, something 352 00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:20,040 unforeseen that made me have to take a step back, whether it be 353 00:21:20,960 --> 00:21:26,880 or my my choice, I think I would try and keep myself in the 354 00:21:26,880 --> 00:21:28,880 community as some sort of a like. 355 00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:32,480 I love mentoring new couples, I love doing that being a support 356 00:21:33,120 --> 00:21:36,320 and mentoring and thing. I think I would see myself in, 357 00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:38,320 in that kind of a role. Cool. 358 00:21:38,440 --> 00:21:43,600 Just so that I can in the community in a as in an active 359 00:21:43,600 --> 00:21:47,720 way, without necessarily playing maybe any more. 360 00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:51,000 I don't know. I I don't see my, I don't see 361 00:21:51,160 --> 00:21:56,120 the lifestyle being something that I could walk away from. 362 00:21:57,720 --> 00:22:00,120 Well, I think you and I have that shared experience. 363 00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:03,520 The friends that we've met in this lifestyle, I mean they 364 00:22:03,520 --> 00:22:06,200 literally they feel like they're ride or die. 365 00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:10,400 I mean more than like high high school friends. 366 00:22:10,400 --> 00:22:14,280 More than you know, people that you've known for 20-30 years to 367 00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:19,160 have this shared lifestyle experience and to form 368 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:24,840 association from some of the men that you might have connections 369 00:22:24,840 --> 00:22:28,480 with to the couples. I mean, the couples are just are 370 00:22:28,480 --> 00:22:30,880 just golden. They're just golden. 371 00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:36,680 Just I I never expected the couple connection like I didn't. 372 00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:38,120 I I always kind of figured it was. 373 00:22:39,080 --> 00:22:42,400 I figured if we had left, we weren't going to make couple 374 00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:45,360 friends anymore. I was very wrong. 375 00:22:45,360 --> 00:22:46,840 It was. Very wrong. 376 00:22:47,360 --> 00:22:50,720 And yeah, we have made a couple, a couple friends like you and 377 00:22:50,720 --> 00:22:53,520 Richard. And we have friends in LA, We 378 00:22:53,520 --> 00:22:55,560 have friends in Florida. We have friends in Chicago. 379 00:22:55,560 --> 00:22:59,600 We have friends in Texas. We have like I talked to women 380 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:05,000 all over America and and my husband talks to other husbands 381 00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:08,640 and yeah, when we go to events it is like a big reunion. 382 00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:10,600 It's so much fun. It is. 383 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:13,600 It is just like that. And it's, you know, as you get. 384 00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:17,240 And I've particularly been dealing with this too, as I have 385 00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:22,200 retired from my core business, the business world anymore. 386 00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:26,200 And I'm not doing a lot of the things that kept me around my my 387 00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:29,720 tribe, especially when you retire. 388 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:34,280 So how you acquire friends after that stage of life becomes 389 00:23:34,280 --> 00:23:36,920 really important and really critical. 390 00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,320 And not very many people have an Ave. to it. 391 00:23:39,320 --> 00:23:43,280 So, you know, I've been to Splash twice and in both 392 00:23:43,280 --> 00:23:46,800 occasions, you know, I met one person that was delightful. 393 00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:50,760 But really, the joy I got out of going to Splash was the reunion 394 00:23:50,760 --> 00:23:53,840 with the couples meetings, meeting some of those couples 395 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,600 for the first time and then reunion. 396 00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:58,560 You know, on the second time that we met it, it just was 397 00:23:58,560 --> 00:24:04,000 absolutely the most joyful, joyful, smart, fun, funny group 398 00:24:04,000 --> 00:24:06,640 of people. I mean, the sex is great, but 399 00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:09,920 it's the connecting with the other couples that feeds your 400 00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:14,240 soul for the rest of the year. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. 401 00:24:14,240 --> 00:24:15,600 And it's that's. What we live off of. 402 00:24:15,680 --> 00:24:16,120 That. That. 403 00:24:16,160 --> 00:24:18,880 No, you're you're 100% right, because the sex lasts. 404 00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:23,120 Well, however, it does. These connections and these 405 00:24:23,120 --> 00:24:26,680 friendships, and yeah, those are those are what really keep us, 406 00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:28,800 keep us going, keep us going back. 407 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:30,800 Yes, that's right. And when something comes up, 408 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:33,280 you've got, you know, you've got sort of a built in tribe. 409 00:24:33,280 --> 00:24:39,080 So anyway, you're a big advocate, as are we, And I'm so, 410 00:24:39,080 --> 00:24:42,960 so thankful that with us today to share some of your story. 411 00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:46,280 How would how would our listeners get in touch with you 412 00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:48,960 if they wanted to communicate with you or find your stuff or 413 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:51,800 locate you some kind of way? How would you advise well? 414 00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:56,040 I am blonde on the Bay pretty much everywhere. 415 00:24:56,560 --> 00:24:59,560 Ex. That life. 416 00:24:59,560 --> 00:25:02,400 I'm active. If then I am any of the other 417 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:06,120 sites, I just don't have a lot of luck on the other side. 418 00:25:06,120 --> 00:25:09,280 So I don't bother. Fetlife Blonde on the Bay. 419 00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:13,640 Ex Blonde on the Bay. You can e-mail me Blonde on the 420 00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:18,360 bay@gmail.com. I'm pretty good at responding. 421 00:25:18,360 --> 00:25:20,000 Oh, I'm on Sex to Panther. But that's. 422 00:25:21,080 --> 00:25:25,040 So I love the name though. It's hilarious. 423 00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:26,720 It is. It is. 424 00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:29,880 It's kind of a strange. It's kind of a strange platform, 425 00:25:30,240 --> 00:25:35,000 but I'm very responsive and I will always answer a polite and 426 00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:39,760 kind message. I am a kind person and I expect 427 00:25:39,800 --> 00:25:43,440 to be with respect and kindness. Good point. 428 00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:45,560 Good point. Don't send me a Dick pic. 429 00:25:45,640 --> 00:25:48,400 Yeah, yeah, yeah. None of us. 430 00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:51,520 None of us like that. So just stop it. 431 00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:53,920 Just stop it. Thank you. 432 00:25:54,440 --> 00:25:56,880 Don't try to convert me back to right. 433 00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:59,800 It's not going to happen. Right, right. 434 00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:03,960 Thank you so, so, so much, Blondie. 435 00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:07,800 It was just a pleasure to talk with you as always and I really 436 00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:11,240 look forward to your visit when you come floating through our 437 00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:12,600 part of the world. Yeah. 438 00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:13,560 We'll see you in a couple months. 439 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,880 We'll have as much fun as we can possibly cram into that time. 440 00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:19,960 That's a lot of fun. It is OK. 441 00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:21,400 Bye.