So I have a question for my fellow beautiful players and
that is why did you choose in Blades in the Dark the class
that you chose? I think it's a in Blades in the
Dark, we call it like a playbook and you get like your own little
sheet. And I'm wondering, why did you
choose what you chose? I chose to be the GM because I
have control issues. OK, and I don't like when it's
not my turn to talk. You like to choose the whole
playbook. The whole.
Yeah, yeah, the entire playbook. And largely it really, I just, I
just don't like it when it's not my turn to talk.
It's. But Kat, it's so good that
you're like that because I think the rest of us would die if we
had to do it. Exactly, Errol, What about you?
Why'd you choose your playbook slash?
What is it? Yeah, I mean it's the Leech
Playbook, which is a saboteur and technician and basically
like, you know, it's very mad scientist coded, which was what
I was going for and you know, poisons and stuff.
And yeah. And it even has like a an
ability that venomous, it says secrete through your skin or
saliva or exhale as a vapor like a drug or poison of your choice,
which is. Literally.
Oh OK cool. Fucked up is so is that the
first ability that you checked? Then yes, 'cause I was like,
that's like my little idea that I want to do That's awesome.
What you Juniper? I chose a slide which is a
subtle manipulator and spy. Subtle is not the word.
I would. But that's because of his
background, which is nobility slash emperor.
Is it basically like you're like the con man, You're like?
Yeah. So it says talk your way into
trouble, then talk your way out again, pretend to be somebody
you're not, bluff, lie, manipulate to get your way.
So that, I think is more what Valerian is.
And I chose that because it's integral to his like background
and kind of back story and like how he got to where he is or
where he was, I guess when the story started.
And I just wanted to play a face man.
I think they're fun and and I like to bully my friends in a in
a safe and consensual environment.
I don't see how that relates to being the face man.
It just has a lot to do with it so.
You're just always bringing that up when it's not relevant.
So. I wish you'd stop.
Well, I won't. No.
Well, what about you, I? I chose the weirdest possible
thing. I chose a rail Jack, which is
actually not really one of the playbooks playbooks.
Technically it's kind of it's like a supplemental playbook
that I think is supposed to be used specifically for like a
particular additional, what is it called, version campaign that
they came out with like the official Blades in the Dark
People DLC. It was a.
DLC, Yeah. Yeah, you don't.
Yeah. It's a DLC class.
Yeah, I downloaded. It I downloaded it unlike you
guys, so I chose real download a class because real Jack is
literally like you are on a train, which is what that
supplemental thing is about. And I really wanted my character
to have been on the train for a while, which initially when Kat
and I talked, Kat was like, oh. That's that's tough.
We had to find a way for it to work, which I think is is
interesting and good. So why you have no memories?
I don't think so. I think that is just a natural
consequence that would already have happened.
So real jacks are they're kind of like two things, which also
really fits with Pepper. They're like, partially magical
and in tune with ghosts, and they're partially, like,
fighters and, like, strong. And I think I chose a bunch of
consort and sway also because I was just like, I know us.
Yeah, I know. That's what we're fucking doing
every time. Yeah.
Even though technically I should be hitting this person over the
head, what if I just lied to them and said we should have
just been three slides? Three slides, literally.
Slides on slides on slides. On slides?
What did you guys pick for your
special? Ability.
Oh yeah. So there's like a list for each
playbook. You have a list of special
abilities. My first one I chose was the
goat footed one which was like basically from navigating around
on a train you are really like steady footed and you can't trip
very easily. So I get around.
I get an extra 1D on certain checks because of that.
That's cool actions, I should say Yes.
Yes, this is not D&D. We must.
We don't have checks. We don't have checks.
We do actions. We do actions.
We don't have checks, we only have cash.
We only have cash and credit. Cash money.
Baby. Cash on money, what did you
pick? Oh, I already mentioned my
special body is venomous. That's what I.
Was right. That's right.
It was interesting because like, I do think I had the idea for
Friedrich having the smoke thing before I read the Blades
playbook, but then I saw it and I was like, let's let's mush
them together. Nice.
Very good, very good. What's Valerians?
Valerians is called like looking into a mirror and it means you
can always tell when someone is lying to you, which.
You should have told me that. I did at the beginning.
Yeah, I'm not. You need to remind.
You need to remind me of that. That's actually like OP as fuck.
Yeah. Like remember you have that one
that is a really good. Will, because there have been
times where I'm like, I'm sure, you know, obviously Friedrich,
I'm sure lies about things all the time and like other
characters too, but I haven't said anything, mostly because
I'm like, in the moments it's like Valerian doesn't
necessarily care. Yeah.
I'm. Not interested.
Yeah, that's definitely the vibe I've gotten, is there hasn't
been a moment where Valerian has desperately wanted to know if
someone's lying. Yeah, yeah.
There's, there's been like I think one time that I've
mentioned it and that's it. OK, OK, nice.
All right, everybody. Well, now that we've done the
thing we should have done in Episode 1, let's play Blades in
the Dark. Oh yeah.
Hello, my name is Kat and I can only ever be the GM.
Hi, my name is Noelle, I play Pepper and she can only ever be
the real Jack. I'm Juniper and I play Valerian,
who is a slide and he's always going to be sliding.
And he's never going to stop. End statement.
Yeah, always. My favorite Juniper is when you
realize you get to you get to the end of a sentence, but you
weren't planning for that to be the end, you just ran out of
words. I like I was hoping that by the
time I would get to the end of the sentence a joke.
Would something else to say? Yeah, and it doesn't.
And then I. Have to just stop it there just.
Got to let it lie. That's.
How I get you. We'll always be signing.
Let it lie. All right.
Hi, I'm Errol. I play Friedrich Weiss, a Leech,
and that's that's it. OK, so last time we did
downtime, which is the Blade stage that always comes after a
score. During that, Stella, the woman
that Friedrich Busblow did, arrived at your lair to offer
you a deal with her group, the Hemlock Hands.
So now you're on better terms with them.
However, she let you know that your heist was on another gang's
turf, the House of Ma, and you'll have to pay them because
you crossed them. So you're not on such good terms
with those guys. As part of downtime, you guys
leveled up. We calculated some of your
various reputation points that are going to affect things going
forward. We healed some of your harms
with the nurse Debbie, who you all equally loved and you all
each indulged your vice to relieve some stress.
Friedrich experimented, Valerian shopped, and Pepper tracked some
mysterious stuff inside her coat.
So that is where we left off. We finished up downtime and now
we are going to start on free play.
So free play, free play before before the train comes into
station at the next World. Do you guys have anything you
want to do around? Never know where anyone else you
want to go see, any place, places you want to visit, people
you want to learn about. Valerian's in the room, He's
hung up his red Cape on the door because, like you said, cat, it
just makes him want when he's wearing it.
And he has procured a tape measure that has horses on it
instead of numbers. And so you have to diligently
count every single horse to know exactly what you're measuring.
And it's really fucking annoying, but it's all that he
has and he is taking measurements of the entire area
to prepare to get booby traps installed next time.
Valerian, there is a knock on the door as you are measuring
your room for booby traps. Valerian curses because he's
lost count. And on the other side of the
door there is a smiling Porter wearing the traditional blue
uniform white gloves, and she pops in and she is carrying a
door under one arm. And Pepper is behind her,
strumming her lute, and she says I'm here.
Yes, welcome. I count.
Can you count? I see.
Put it wherever, anywhere. I'm not particularly pepper.
Can you count? I can count.
OK, I need you to count these horses for me please And and
valerian points. And the Porter just, it's sort
of like a unrolling, like a, a poster or something where she
just like puts the door against a wall and smooths it all around
with her hands and she knocks twice and opens it and it opens
into Pepper's room. Yay.
And it's like, and like a little bit of water from the flood,
like. Yeah.
Oh yeah. There's a little spill of water
from the canal comes in. Get that out of here.
My room is so nice, Can you believe it?
Not 3-4 horses, five horses. And as we're counting horses,
there's another knock on the door.
Yes, come in, everybody's here. Friedrich walks in with another
Porter behind him, and he's looking uppity and sanctimonious
as usual, and he says, oh, Pepper, you're here already. 11
horses. Hi, Friedrich Horses.
Damn it, don't talk to her, she's counting.
Well I I figured that this room is a very valuable asset and I
didn't feel comfortable in trusting the safety of it to
you, so I've decided to attach my room as well for the time
being. Our door is very strong and
smarter. Now wait, hold on, we need to
clarify something because I'm not sharing my bathroom.
You have your own bathrooms in your rooms.
You better. You won't have mine.
Wait, do we? I have.
I have a small bathroom. You have one small bathroom.
You guys can decide whether you have bathrooms or not.
I'm imagining it's like one of those bathrooms where like you
can step into it and that's it. There's like literally a toilet
like next to where the shower is and there's no dividing.
Yeah, I think it's actually it's even smaller than that.
The shower head is over the toilet.
OK. So, yeah, so it to be fair, I am
not making this up. I have been in a bathroom like
this. Yeah.
I have as well. So yeah, it's like the smallest
bathroom. And so Valerian's not, he's not
going to share. Pepper has a.
Toilet, but she doesn't have a shower and she's fully planning
to use her shower but she just don't.
Don't let him find out, don't let him find out, and he'll know
if you use his shampoo because he needs a lot of it.
Yeah, I feel like free dressing rooms probably isn't much nicer
than Peppers, so probably a similar situation.
There's a sink and a toilet and that's it.
Shared showers, probably for the Block.
Yeah, I think especially in Candle Hall, there's like a dorm
style shower facility, yeah, that you have access to.
A shitty shower is like a luxury.
Yeah, exactly. Exactly like not Valerian.
Does not want to share. Yeah, that's room is as small
and tiny as it is actually a pretty nice space for this
train, so. Friedrich says to Valerian, as
if I would sully myself by using your personal facilities.
But in his mind, he is already thinking about finding a time to
use yourself. Valerian says if you go in there
and you take a big shit and you stink it up with your little
smoke, I will not be pleased and I will know you're in there.
I'm going to put the devices in that bathroom to monitor
activity. Sir, I have never met anyone who
who spoke with such a a a a crass manner who who claimed to
be a former emperor. I've never met anyone who
claimed to be a former emperor. Pepper goes back to counting the
horses. She's at 45.
Are you counting them allowed? Yeah. 45 horses. 46 horses. 47
horses. What on earth do you have her
doing? Friedrich says to Valerian.
She's measuring for booby traps. We have to install them 51.
Horses. You need to take measurements to
install your booby traps. Yes, you don't know how big of a
space you have. What if you install a booby trap
with a hanging knife, but the swing is too much for the
momentum and it crashes into the wall?
You've got damage in your walls then, as opposed to just the
person you're trying to slice in half.
You have to have measurement. Pepper is is now just like
playing a song. Focus.
I forgot what I was doing, sorry.
Friedrich rolls his eyes and says, well, I suppose if you
can't measure distances accurately with your eyes.
And I. Can't.
I would never presume to have such an ability, and anyone who
does is lying to themselves. We'll see about that, I say.
And I pull out a notebook and I start looking around so that I
can draft some booby trap concepts.
Valerian goes over to Pepper and says I've hinted your job after
someone else so you don't have to worry about counting anymore.
Hood a relief. Yes, we have a very eager Beaver
over here. Valerian master manipulator.
While Friedrich is accurately measuring distances with his
eyes. Yeah, he's multitasking.
And he says to Pepper. So that thing you did back in
Apatrea, how exactly was that accomplished?
Oh well, I disguised myself as one of the contestants and no,
no, I thought you were my dad. I'm talking about the the energy
that you summoned, the way that you you brought us through the
floor. Right, right.
Have you never seen anything like that before?
Certainly not. Oh, you must be from one of
those worlds. Those.
Worlds. What do you mean?
Yeah, well, it manifests differently in different places.
In my world. You can do that sort of stuff
through the power of music in general, I guess.
Some places it's just magic, some places it's energy on the
train. It's ghosts, so sometimes it
helps to think of them as the ghosts of people, and I think
that's kind of what it was in Apatria too.
That tends to be the most common one.
Pepper, you noticed that Friedrich, like when you
initially started talking, like his eyes were very bright and he
was very attentive. And then as soon as he heard
like the words magic and ghosts like you see, like, his eyes
just sort of glaze over and he says, 0 Thank you, Pepper.
That was very enlightening. Well, what were you expecting?
A scientific explanation, perhaps?
Well, maybe you can find one. Well, I'm certain I will, but if
you do have any other insight to offer into the process, you will
let me know. I mean, yeah, I guess.
I mean, not that I'm not grateful.
What you did was it was impressive and, and, and you
really did save us all. So I have no doubt that with
your abilities and my research, we'll be able to make some.
Breakthroughs. Pepper's eyes get huge and
they're like kind of like glassy, and she grabs onto both
of your hands with her hands and she says and we'll be like the
best of friends. And Friedrich looks so
uncomfortable, like his eyes are like darting around.
He does not know what to do. And he kind of like tensely
extricates his hands from your hands and just gives like a very
stiff pat on top of your hands. If you wait, no, come back.
If you, if you, if you want to hear like a song, you can see
the ghosts. They they, when I sing, they,
they come closer. Really.
Yeah, they always do. Yes, Pepper, I should like very
much to see that. I don't know if I'm allowed to
play in here though. I got told by a tall woman that
I'm not allowed to play music anymore and she like looks
around. Valerian has completely stopped
listening to anything you guys are doing.
He is like lounging on the bed reading a book and eating grapes
and he he chimes in to say, Friedrich, make sure you are
still measuring with those good accurate eyes of yours.
Music is allowed in this room. And.
Friedrich snaps back.
Don't tell me what to do. I didn't tell you to do it the
first time, just want to make sure you're going to prove
yourself to me. I'm so skeptical about your
abilities. You're skeptical about my
abilities. Tell me exactly what did you
accomplish during our previous high trial?
I was sabotaging challenges and Pepper was summoning ghosts.
Pepper, are you going to play the music?
Yeah, Pepper gets out of here, and as she strums, she's like,
I've been working on this one really, really hard and it
always makes me feel happier, you know, when I'm feeling down.
So I hope he does the same for you guys.
And then she starts playing time, my dear.
It turns like a wheel and burns my dear like red twisted steel.
500 seasons and still I'm the fool.
Covets them bygone and mourns for the hewn.
In other worlds, maybe we fought and we stayed here Only shadows,
stains. Do you like it?
Oh, that was beautiful, Pepper. Friedrich has been watching you
with rapt attention. I'm curious, did anything ghost
related happen as you were playing?
Anything ghost related happen as I was playing cat.
I think as Pepper was playing, the room got significantly
colder, like the temperature dropped by a couple of degrees
and Friedrich you could just sort of bear rarely see coming
through the walls like a very misty shape.
But because the song you know Pepper didn't play for very
long, as soon as she stops the everything sort of disappears.
Do you see the ghosts? They always show up.
I saw like at least 4 ghosts. And Friedrich, as you look at
him like he's got the German math lady brain face and he sort
of is whispering to himself and he says I will be able to
achieve things never drained of in.
This world. What do you mean by that?
Pepper, we're going to research your musical abilities and we're
going to find the source. And maybe it could even be
connected to my vapor. Oh, is is vapor like ghosts in
your world? Maybe you don't come from one of
those worlds after all. Well, ghosts aren't real, so
it's not that. We just saw them.
I think ghosts are very real. We just.
It was in the. Room.
It's an unexplained phenomena, but with my intellect I'm going
to learn to understand it, even harness it.
Your guess is an unexplained phenomenon, but that doesn't
mean it's not real. It's called vapor.
That's an unexplained phenomenon.
Oh yeah, Valerian, Valerian high fives.
And Friedrich, you can tell he's kind of retreating into his own
mind as he stares off into the middle distance.
Oh, Friedrich, you will be challenged by more things than
ghosts in this world. All right, so you guys have
these few days of quiet, sort of as the train travels through the
void between worlds. Catch your breath, maybe prepare
a little bit better for your next job.
You work on your synergy. You maybe do some team building
exercises like. Pepper is organizing those.
Yeah, right. Like booby trap building one O 1
team building exercises. Nothing usable comes out of it
yet. But you know, you are all
feeling a little more synergized, a little more team
built when the train does come to a stop and none of you are
yet used to that sickening jello going splat feeling as it comes
into station. But you do notice that there's a
little bit of commotion among the Bluebirds.
The trains scouts scurry off to see what awaits them outside,
and they come back very quickly. They're covered in ash or maybe
dirt. When they come in, you can see
that they've all tied bandanas over their faces, and then the
ones who go out next. They Don full coverage suits and
masks. When they do come back, their
faces are grim and they shake their heads.
The rumors reach you before the official announcement does.
A dead world. You hear from other people that
this happens. Sometimes the train pulls up to
a world just after it has encountered some sort of massive
tragedy or apocalypse. It's not something that happens
frequently, as the train seems to seek out lively worlds where
its passengers can perform and gather people and mementos.
But sometimes its timing is a little bit off and the circus
pulls in a little too late and all of the people are gone.
When the announcement does come, it is made by an older girl in
her teens. She is gangly and tall, with
reddish brown hair that's cut in a choppy Bob and a thick layer
of freckles over her nose and cheeks.
A huge Saint Bernard walks next to her and sits down.
As she picks up the frog megaphone, someone nearby
whispers. Uh oh.
If Captain Jean is making the announcements, then the rumors
are definitely true. I'm sure most of you have
already heard by now, but this is a dead world.
She says. She's cutting straight to the
chase and the room erupts into murmuring.
The dog by her side barks once and everybody pays attention
again. My blueberries have searched
both above and below the city looking to see if there are
survivors, but it appears we have arrived just a few days
after a catastrophic blast has leveled the area.
From what we've been able to gather, we found that this was a
technologically advanced world, and it appears everyone blew
each other up at more or less the same time.
It's one of those mutually assured destruction scenarios,
so if there's any people left in this world, they are far away
from the city and probably not in the mood to go to the circus.
I've spoken to the porters. They've informed me that we will
remain stopped for two days. If you want to go sift through
the rubble, then the local fashion is full coverage PPE.
The soil is toxic, as is the ash falling from the sky.
I don't recommend leaving the train unless you have proper
protections. If you do go out there, make
sure you go through the full pee contamination procedures when
you come back in. The costume department is
already set up for it, so don't try to skip it.
We will not be taking any further questions and all
Bluebirds are ordered to remain inside the train for the
remainder of our stay here. That is all.
And then she and the dog descend from the stage and the room
erupts into noise. People are tallying up what they
have banked in storage and there's a good deal of fretting.
Never. Nowhere is a city that is built
on import, and it seems that an interruption in that flow of
goods is a cause for alarm. The three of you are standing
there, deciding what to do next. A Porter comes up and taps you
on the shoulder. Hello, they say with an empty
smile. Hi.
I have a message for you from the head office.
The ringmaster asks that I inform you that this counts as a
stop for the purposes of your deal.
I thought it would. Yet I expected that as well.
OK, do we want to go sift through the toxic garbage or do
we want to rob somebody? Well, the Bluebirds said they
won't give us any more information, so I don't know how
we're supposed to find a lead out there.
Well, we sift through the toxic garbage.
I've sifted through toxic garbage before.
I have two wait. What?
Many time. Well, this isn't the first dead
world I've been to, and last time I wasn't even like in the
train, you know? I don't remember it very well
though. Many places in my home world had
toxic fallout from magic and I grew up near 1 playing all the
time in the toxic garbage. Well, you were probably fine
because magic isn't real. But circling back to what Pepper
was saying. One of these days.
One of these days, green brick. Pepper, you said you've been to
a dead world before. Well, yeah.
How? How was your luck in in finding
mementos? I mean, I'd never have had found
a memento before until like last time when we found mementos.
OK so there was nobody to play music for so I didn't like get
any money or anything for fairs. And I'm assuming all the dead
worlds are different. The last one wasn't exactly
toxic, it was just, you know, dead.
Well, a ghost, though we could ask the ghosts.
Oh there is a good idea. Lots of dead people around after
apocalypse or local tragedy. So how does one ask the ghosts?
Well, I think you've seen me talk to ghosts many times,
Friedrich at this point, right? Don't listen to him, Pepper.
Let's just do. Let's just call the ghosts.
We'll have a conversation. Friedrich can learn and write in
his little notebook. Friedrich looks so mad because
that's exactly what he's going to.
Do I mean, we could do that? We probably can't talk to the
ones outside the train unless we go outside the train though.
Yes. Well, they did say they have
equipment for us. I'm all for it.
Me too. Unless you have someone in mind
that you want to rob. No, I I think later definitely,
but right now I think we have pissed enough people off.
I think it would be a net negative to rob someone at this
point. So your judgement does have some
limits. I don't catch your meaning.
Nothing. Let's yes, let's go out there.
All right. You guys get suited up in full
PPE. I'm talking white coveralls, big
personal protective equipment, energy.
Hazmat. Total hazmat suit vibes.
Like you've got respirators on? Do we have Geiger counters?
They don't give you Geiger counters, No, but.
We don't even know what kind of fallout it is, though it may or
may not be radioactive. That's true.
Pepper, how are you planning to
play your music with full hazmat suit on?
Actually, you know what I think she would do?
I think she would resort to using her lute more as like a
drum. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
OK. And then she would just like,
sing a little song. OK.
Hell yeah. So we get suited.
Up. Get suited up.
The circus has still unfolded as it always does, but obviously
nobody's in the circus, so there's just performers milling
about. People are just kind of trying
to make the best of it. Somebody's putting together a
party. It's a dead world party and
they're putting it together in one of the main performance
spaces. So everyone at the party has to
be in the haz nut suit size. Suit.
As long as you're in the circus, you're fine, but as soon as you
get out of the circus, you have to be totally covered up.
So once you're in the circus tent, because the circus tent is
not necessarily in the world. OK.
It is part of the train, it is not part of the world that it is
in. So as soon as you guys hit the
exit, you are in the collapsed rubble of this dead world.
There is something about it that feels familiar, the same way
something about Apatreya felt familiar.
The layout of the streets, what is left of them, some of the
buildings, maybe you can see echoes of the cities you've been
to. But this world is gone.
The sky is an eerie shade of dark red.
There is a constant fine mist of ash that is raining down on you.
Do we see anyone else who's like out here trying to scavenge?
Yeah, You see, there's a small group who came out ahead of you
and there's about six of them actually.
So compared to you, a large group.
And they are sifting through the rubble with like shovels and
they are just trying to shift rubble to get down into one of
the buildings. And you can see on their PBE
they all have a little like badge on their PPE that has a
rat on it. Rat.
OK, my people. Oh, cat.
Speaking of my rat, Yeah, hashtag my rat.
Is there a suit for him? Is there a suit for your rat?
From Is there a suit for my rat? Yeah, actually there is a suit
for your rat. Yes.
Hell yeah. My rats come in with us, you
guys. Hell yeah.
Yeah, Rat. I mean, Cage, I'm going to train
this rat. I think that's going to be,
that's going to be, hold on, I need to write that down.
Train Rat. Good idea, good to have a train.
Yeah. Should we try and kind of like
drift near the rat folks and see like if we overhear anything
from them? Or do we want to just like set
out and try and find our own place to pillage?
I would want to go over to them and talk to them.
So as you approach, a man goes, hey, who goes there?
And it's just me. I'm coming to say hi.
I saw you had the rats on your patch Look.
And Valerian points to the rat that's in his cage wearing a PPE
suit. That's made.
For rats, and the man sort of leans down to look at the rat,
and then he peers through your face mask and goes, it's you you
recognize through his face mask. It is Yovis Grist, the member of
the Piper Lords. Is that the guy that was trying
to steal? Yes.
That's trying to seal the room. Yep.
And he looks, he looks at you
and goes. Have you come to join a more
successful group? We're still interested in that
little room of yours. Not the necessarily, I haven't
made-up my mind yet. I'm kind of annoyed that you
guys have taken my IP, but I just wanted to say hello, you
know, be friendly. So good luck on the hunt.
I'm still considering your offer.
You OK? Oh, bye.
Valerian leaves because he didn't know that it was the
fucking Piper alarm. And he goes back to you guys and
he says we don't mess with those guys, they're the ones trying to
take our fucking house. And my copyright on having a
rat. That's them.
It's them. I don't think you can have a
copyright on owning a RAT. I have one.
I'll show it to you later. It's real.
It seems real. Pepper with your arcane senses.
The air is thick with ghosts. You feel cold and clammy all
over, and even though the ghosts are incorporeal, you feel like
you are pushing through a dense crowd.
She is like feeling pretty weird.
She's been ghost touched so being surrounded by I'm assuming
billion ghosts. Billion ghosts.
She like taps out a rhythm on
the back of her loot. Can I make like in a tune roll?
Yeah, I think you will, but you'll do it with what I think
less effect. Yeah, less effect, Yes.
What she's trying to do is she's trying to find like an area
where the ghosts are the thickest.
Sure. I will say this is going to be
limited effect because you are, you are injured, your ghost
touched, but it will be controlled because there are no
real consequences if you do. Wait, does pepper have two level
1 harms or? No, it's not.
So that's not how it works. If you have one in level 1,
whatever that is, you have less effect in.
So like I'm in ghost touch, so I have less effect in ghostly
related things. Like if you had if you had a
twisted ankle in level 1 you would have less effect on.
Running. Running.
Oh yeah. Then my other thought was just
as you're doing this, I assume like first we kind of get to a
place where we're out of like the sight line of the Piper
Lords. That makes sense.
That would make sense, wouldn't we?
Yeah. Because we don't want them
fucking like getting in on our shit.
Yeah, scope and all our we go down, we go down another little.
Street between the crumbly crumblies.
OK, I think I just get to roll 1, so I guess I'll do that.
I got a 2. I think that is not a success.
Damn. If you want to roll again, you
can roll again in a risky, positionally risky limited.
OK, so there would be an effect if I fail?
Yes. This time, is there anything
that we can do to like assist Pepper?
I mean if this is our only thing what if you guys both use the
stress and gave me 2DS is that not worth it?
I just feel like this is our only week, like we should like
have it work. Yeah, yeah.
Precious, precious stress. Not too hefty of a of a cost.
Fuck it, hey. Fuck it, hey, if you get traumas
that just means you have something else that you can play
into to get experience. That's true, and as long as we
don't take for trauma, we don't have to die.
If they're giving me this stress, I would kind of like to
like shift my aim a little bit, then OK to not just finding
where the ghosts are the thickest, but to find like where
the ghosts have centered the most, like emotion.
Oh, very good is. There anything that we should do
like in game? I think you guys are going to
have to help with Pepper's song. Oh, OK, OK, OK.
So Pepper, she's knocking and she's kind of like humming and
she she just kind of like gets her brain scrambled by it.
She gets a little like, dizzy and woozy.
And then she can't really figure out where to go, so she stops.
And then she looks at you too, and she says music is more
powerful when it's more than one person.
Do you guys know how to like, sing or, or maybe like, do you
know how to play the loot? She holds out her loot.
I can play the violin. I don't have one with me.
Yeah, I have no music. That's.
Stupid. You don't bring your violin
around. You have to.
You're from one of those worlds. I forgot.
It's OK. You don't know how to do
anything, Valerian. No, I, I'd.
Malaria knows how to do nothing at all.
I was never trained formally as a child due to growing up next
to the toxic waste fields. So better snow you guys didn't?
You guys didn't clap or like snap or like?
Stomach feet could try to slap. I mean clap.
I could slap Friedrich. Don't do that.
I don't see how that would be helpful.
Couple of times in like a rhythmic fashion.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Why don't you just tap your toe
and Friedrich, if you could pluck this string and she hands
you her loot. All right, OK on the offbeat.
And I'll sing a little song and and we'll try this again.
All right, A1A2A1234. Please go ahead.
We got to get something all right.
I did get 1/6. We got 1-6 all right, So it's a
success with limited effect. You are listening to the voices
of these ghosts and Friedrich again it's the temperature drops
and you can see like your breath fogging on your mask.
And in your unbelieving heart you only see just the faintest
echoes of these ghosts. But you do see something,
something that you cannot easily explain and pepper in your
believing heart. You see the ghost of a young
girl make her way out of the crowd and she grabs your hand
and starts to lead you down the street.
Oh, back the way you came. And as you walk along, you hear
a cry of triumph from the Piper Lords.
God damn it. And they have pulled something
out of the rubble, and she points at it, and she has the
most heartsick expression on her face as they pull from the
rubble a scroll that was wrapped in some sort of protective
wrapping. And then she fades away.
Oh. Did Valerian see that as well or
what? Oh.
Yeah, Valerian, you in your medium believing heart, you saw
it, but not as not as vividly, not as vividly as Pepper did,
OK. Yeah, I've been following along
with Pepper and I see that the fucking object that we've been
led to is one that the Piper Lords are excavating.
And I say, were there no other objects with sentimental value
in this entire city? I don't know, I mean, maybe she
was just leading us to the closest one we could could.
She come back and have her on on the the magical communication
device speed dial. I mean, I feel like she's just
going to lead me to the scroll again.
Isn't there any way you can figure out how they found that
thing? What me?
Yeah, my music's all messed up since Apatre anyways.
Well, you guys want to join the Piper Lords?
Oh, hello, dear listeners. How are you, my sweet, beautiful
chickens? Rise and grind.
Let's crack those eggs. I had a really good egg sandwich
for lunch, so I'm riding high on that egg energy.
Pure, strong egg energy today. All right, so let's get into the
mid roll. My sweets first.
Do you like us? I hope so.
If you're listening to this podcast and listening through
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Next, I have a Spotify comment from the last episode to respond
to. If you would like to get shouted
out, make sure you're commenting on our Spotify drops.
That is the current Ave. for getting onto this show.
So this one is it's a 2 for actually.
So I'm going to shout out Bean under score, Boyd the best, and
Phoenix who responded to them. And before I get into their
comments, I need to issue an apology because in the last
episode I talked a lot about how is a big New York Times mini
crossword head. And it was my favorite and I
loved it and I did it every day. And then literally, I don't
know, like 3 days after we recorded that New York Times put
their mini crossword behind a paywall.
I am crushed. I'm livid.
I'm not surprised because it's the New York Times and they're
not, you know, the greatest media company in the world.
However, dear listeners, Dean, under score boy, the Best and
Phoenix have some have some suggestions there.
So Dean says, dear larks, if you don't want to pay for a
subscription to play crossword parentheses, New York Times, you
bastard aside here. I agree.
What horrendous bastards. I'm so mad at them.
Anyway, the Washington Post also has free games and a free
crossword. That way you don't have to pay
for newspapers, especially ones that have iffy stances.
And Phoenix responds saying I usually do the LA Times.
Thank you to you both. I personally am not a fan of the
LA Times crossword. I find it to be a little bit too
ivory tower. I don't know, they make a lot of
references to like opera. Like who is the baritone of this
one specific opera? I'm not very good at those, so I
don't like them. However, thanks to this comment,
I started doing the Washington Post mini crossword and I'm back
on my crossword groove. So thank you so much to our
crossword heads out there. If I'm just saying now, I guess
if you know anyone who works at the Washington Post crosswords,
get legend arc is a clue and I don't know.
I'll send you a something lock of my hair.
I'll send you a lock of my hair. If you can get Legend Lark into
the crossword at the Washington Post, that is a promise.
OK, next, I just want to shout out, as always, our social
media. If you're not already following
us there, that's where you can get announcements on when we're
doing our live stream, Riverdale's, when we are posting
episodes, if we have any new March, all sorts of sweet and
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All that stuff is over on Legend Lark pod, on Tumblr, on Blue
Sky, on Instagram, on Reddit, on TikTok, on YouTube.
And if you are a Discord pal, make sure you're on our fan run
Discord. They do a great job of it over
there. It's a really fun community.
You can discuss all of your never nowhere theories.
You can discuss whether you think Dawson's going to make an
appearance on the train. We'll see.
I can neither confirm nor deny.
And finally, let's do a message to Chantelle.
Chantelle, it is almost October. It is October when this is
airing, so it is October now. I know that you have been
gestating inside the giant pumpkin in the pumpkin patch for
the last several weeks, and I am sure that by the time you hear
this, you will have emerged bigger, stronger, more spiced
than ever. So Chantelle, the code word is
Franks Ashley sleeper agent is active Go.
OK, so it sounds like you have a target, so we will now be moving
into the information gathering stage.
We're not making plans, but you're figuring out your angle
and you'll need some information before you do that, whether you
decide to rob the Piper Lords or join them or betray them or
whatever. I wonder if we could like find a
way to infiltrate the Piper Lords and then betray them.
That's more what I was thinking, yeah.
So you 3 come in from the wasteland outside and you go
through the full decontamination procedures in the costume
department. You are blasted with hot water
and scrubs down by costumers and biohazard suits before you are
given back your street clothes and sent off into never nowhere.
So who wants to go first with their information gathering?
I think Pepper would want to ask Stella, the lady that we blew up
in prison, Freed, saved, killed, rescued.
You have a complicated relationship with Stella.
Yeah. She like, gave us information
about stuff and was, yeah, kind of being friendly and trying to
help us. Why did she say she was doing
that again? Her boss wanted that diadem that
you guys stole. That's right.
That's right, that's right. And currently her boss has it.
Yes, OK, that's right. And we have, we have money.
We have money as a. Trade off, Yeah, you have
collateral money right now. Yeah, I think Pepper would want
to find her and ask her what she knows about the Piper Lords.
OK so you go to find Stella. You ask around and you find out
that the Hemlock hands are based out in Sweetwater.
And so you head out to Sweetwater and the vibe of this
neighborhood is just so nice. You enter through the largest
green space on the train City of Never Nowhere.
There are no gardens where the plants of 1000 different worlds
are cultivated and grown. Some of it is food plants, some
of it is not. But there are lots of gardeners
working here and then a lot of people who just stroll through
the gardens because it's a beautiful place to go.
The Hemlock Hands have a shop that is set up just outside the
gardens not too far into the district.
And when you walk into that shop, Pepper, it is, you know,
like when you go into those really great antique stores
where you're like, I don't think anything is for sale in here.
That is the vibe in this place. But it is all of these, like,
magical artifacts from all these different lands.
And they are stuffed onto shelves.
And some are on display a little bit nicer than others.
And some of them are like, shoved underneath tables.
And as you come in, you hear someone from the backroom swear
very loudly. And then Stella steps out from
the backroom. She goes, ah, it's you.
I hope you're not here for the diadem.
Oh, no. Hi.
I I was here to talk to you, actually.
Oh. Oh, all right, what can I do for
you? And you hear like another crash
and some swaying from the backroom.
She goes. Just ignore those sounds please.
Oh yeah, no problem, I'm great at ignoring stuff.
Could we talk like in private? She looks behind her and then
nods. I think yes, that would be best.
Let us walk in the gardens. Oh, nice, nice.
So we're walking through the beautiful gardens.
Yeah, she takes you out and as you pass through the little bit
of district, Sweetwater has these glass ceilings.
That's it's another double high district, a little bit like the
dark lamp canal where you live Pepper and high above there are
these glass domed ceilings with it looks like daylight coming
through. But obviously you are inside the
train. So you know that it is some type
of an illusion. But it has kind of the vibe of
those indoor marketplaces, you know, with like the glass roof.
And then there's, you know, there's tall buildings on either
side. Nice.
Stella walks with you through the garden, she says.
What can I do for you? Is this business or pleasure?
Pepper Grin's really big and she says, well, you know, there's no
reason it can't be both. But I actually was wondering if
you could tell me about the Piper Lords.
Oh, I hope you're not planning to tangle with them.
And before I say anything, you are going to have to roll.
What do you want to roll to gather this information?
I was thinking consort hey I got a 5.
Oh, hey, hey, that's pretty darn good.
All right. I am going to say you get
standard information for that. Nice.
So Stella sort of snores and goes.
They are a wretched bunch, but they control the moth flights,
so she makes sort of a hand gesture.
The whole thing. Basil Ratmasy.
He's a vicious bastard, Head of the Piper Lords and head of the
district of Moth Light. Can't say that he rose to that
position through legitimate or political means.
He is a slippery, slimy bastard and she just shivers.
Horrible to look at, jeez. Interesting.
Have I ever seen him? No, Pepper is imagining
literally just like the BLOB from Spirited Away, so it's
pretty much the only thing she can imagine being horrified to
look at. The best thing I can say about
the Piper Lords is that they are ruthlessly efficient.
They're an up or out sort of organization.
Except for out means to the porters.
They have this whole, she makes a inverted triangle shape with
her fingers, this inverted pyramid type thing.
And now they recruit as many people as they can, and then
they feed any of those people to the train in order to protect
their more senior members. And if those junior members
manage to recruit someone underneath them, they can send
that person to pay for them. It's distasteful.
It really is. That's horrible, yes.
So Pepper frowns, horrified at this idea, obviously thinking of
Nod. And she says people must be
really mad at them, no? No, unfortunately it's a fairly
standard practice. What?
I'm surprised that you don't know.
I just got here. Well, I suppose that's right.
Nod brought you on board, didn't he?
He would never subscribe to that practice, despite all the
pressure he received in the end. And neither would I, and neither
would you. I'm so glad we found each other.
And she? She grabs her hands.
Yes, well, and she sort of hats your hand but does not agree
with your statement. Pepper doesn't notice.
Well, you aren't planning to do something to the Piper Lords,
are you? And you're certainly not
planning to join. Yeah, no, neither of those
things. Peppers.
And she like, looks around and she's like, anyways, would you
want to like, get, I don't know, a tea or something?
A tea? Yes actually that sounds lovely.
There's a shop not too far from here, I think they got a new
blend in at the last stop. Oh well, I I love plants.
You know me. I don't know you, but I'd like
to. Well, we fuck in the streets.
Kidding. We go to get tea.
Oh my God, and then you fuck in the streets.
And then you fuck outwardly in the street.
Damn. Hey, Mao.
So Pepper's getting some. He wants to go next I.
Feel like Valerian should join? OK, Are you going to officially
join or are you just going to go try to get some information
about joining? What do you?
Guys think should I just try to get information first?
I think it's up to you I guess if I'm going to join here, it
moves. You if I'm going to join
anyways, I guess I'll just go talk to them.
We'll see how it. Goes, yeah, yeah, OK, OK.
Where's the Piper Lord headquarters?
I'm sure they gave me their address.
They don't have necessarily an address, but they have a club
that they are based out of called the Rat Scurry.
They have a consistent theme, no?
I don't you. Can't laugh at it.
No, I'm not. It's funny to me because of how
mad I know Valerian is that that's stepping on his branding.
He's like, he's like, this was my branding.
I don't care that these people were established way.
Before me, he's not giving a shit.
He's coming in with the intention to take over.
He goes to the What was it, the Ratscurry?
Yes, the Ratscurry Club. So valerian the music hits you
before you even open the door. It's this thumping electric bass
with layered heavy drums and the drone of a piercing horn that
alternates with this clear, high voice carrying a wordless
melody. It is challenging to listen to
inside. The club is dark with only a few
brightly colored phosphorescent lights ringing the ceiling and
washing the crowd inside in a black light glow.
The shadow of a rat scurries through these lights every so
often as the creatures travel on small ledges and ropes that
crisscross the club. You enter the club on the ground
floor and look up into a triple high space.
By never know where standards, this place is cavernous, and
when you look up you see balcony boxes that seat small groups who
are carousing and having a good time.
Here on the ground floor there's gambling, card games, dice games
and something played with colored glass balls that are
being tossed into a box of black sand.
At the back of the club is the stage where the band plays,
illuminated by Footlights that cast them in a neon pink glow.
There's a sparse group in front of the stage thrashing to the
music, and you see someone looking down on them from the
most prominent box of seats right above the stage.
Someone with piercing red eyes that glow in the darkness.
Valerian looks directly at the eyes.
Yeah, they look back at you, you feel someone grab you by the
elbow and it is Yogis Grist who you have met a couple of times
before. And he says if it isn't the
emperor finally come to join us, gracing us with his presence at
last. Have you come to kiss the ring?
Don't know about kissing any rings but I've come to educate
myself on this establishment and please, I'm an emperor no
longer, it's Valerian now. All right, if you say so.
Do you have treats for my rap? Valerian's brought his rat on.
Of course, of course. And Yovis laughs, and he goes.
I'm glad to see you're already playing into the theme, but keep
that rat close to you. Why do you say that?
Well, I suppose you'll see in a minute.
Come on, if you're here and you're looking For more
information, you better come meet Basil.
All right. Valerian Pats his little rat
cage. Yovis heads to like, just
underneath that box seat where you made eye contact with the
red eyes, and he gestures and a rope ladder is thrown down.
The two of you ascend to the ladder.
You see Basil is there in the box, and you only see him in
shadow, but there's something very unsettling about him, his
outline. It is squirming and moving.
He's wearing like a long coat and a big wide brimmed hat, but
he leans forward so that his face is illuminated by a small
light on the table in his box, and you see that this man is
made-up entirely of a swarm of rats.
Whoa. And not hot rat guy.
Beg to differ.