Okay, hello. Welcome to this very special
episode of Dames and Dragons, / engine down.
So we are Dames and Dragons. We are an actual play 5e,
Dungeons & Dragons, podcast with a cast of four.
Beautiful. People humans.
I was, I was trying to come up with another adjective.
So eggs for egg is not an adjective eggy, spoiler.
We are a podcast with for beautiful sugary.
Sweet salty, beautiful angelfish in human skins.
Oh yeah. So Dave's and Dragons is the
story of three to four beautiful Guardians and teens who have to
protect a Daya T. / person teen who is a, who is a teen, who is
the goddess? And you know, there's evil,
there's mystery those dumb jokes.
There's so many dumb jokes, a lot of those but we're not like
super close rule followers. That's something to keep in
mind, moving forward. Uh, We kind of prioritize having
a good time together and telling a cool story and the rule of
cool in general. So that's yeah.
There's original deities and lore.
There's me and all these people as well, really good job,
really, really good job. Caste in a nutshell, any sweet,
and salty, nutshell humans can as they say, let's go.
That and introduce ourselves. Hello, I'm cat.
I am your DM here. Now then and there forever and
always and in all things in life.
Amen. And Kat is also IDM on Dames and
dragon. I sure am.
She does a great job. Thank using I am Noel.
Today, I'll be playing Jarrod. He is a druid, the circle of
spores and he is level 6, and he is a goblin.
Thank God. He's the Goblin King Jerrod.
Yeah. Yeah, really.
Yes. And he is a member.
As all of us are of the Go Guys, warm, I'm Caitlin today in this
moment. I am playing eggy, eggy eggy.
Go on bail day egy, and in your heart you pronounce it like the
word egg with two G's in one e and she is a level 6 Ranger and
she's a member of the go Gary hoard but she is a simic.
Hybrid. Wow, I'm Hannah and I'm a
playing isil. Who is a level, 6, Wizard, and a
dark elf. Well that's us.
So I guess, let's get started. Let's do the dang thing.
So today we are playing from the new exciting sensual, D and D
supplement The Guild Masters Guide to wrap.
The car which is bringing in the the world of Ravnica to the
system of D&D much beloved setting in Magic the Gathering.
Now, more nerds can enjoy it. Only one only one type of nerd
could enjoy it and now two types of nerds can enjoy it and even
three types of nerds potentially for that's true.
Maybe even five but only five only fight no more.
No more than 5. So Ravnica is a setting which is
a It's an enormous City, it's a planet-sized city and it is
divided and ruled by guilds. And we we have the pleasure, the
esteemed honor of representing the goal.
Gauri horde today, like some sort of goth trash people.
Yeah. Goth trash people's a very good
description of the goal, gauri hoard.
They value the balance of life and death and nature.
Death is just Part of the cycle of Life, they embrace it.
They spread it and then they put it on a nice Crouton.
I guess. So, the gold gauri their
territory, their Turf is the undercity of Ravnica and all
places where death has begun to claim the life of the city.
The gold gauri are in charge of waste disposal and recycling in
the city. That's what?
Their role is and they do. They do that with pride and a
lot of very good style and they are they're making their moves
on the city of Ravnica. This is their time, their time
to shine. They are the All-Stars.
Okay. Now let's get our game on.
Let's go play. So the three of you are going
gauri agents, you've gained some Acclaim already in the guild.
You are known and trusted. You might not be known Bike by
The Guild leader. Our dad Al flitch Jerrod.
Yeah, Rod. The elf Lich our Guild leader,
he doesn't know your names but you know, he's aware.
Where that there are some very good eggs in his horde.
He wants a and so the three of you that have been asked to meet
with one of the goal gauri high Chancellor's, it is Donna in a
sunken ruins of a Grand Mansion which fell to the undercity
centuries ago, and was claimed by The Horde or perhaps the city
was simply built up over it. It's hard to tell and it doesn't
really matter. Anyway, it will all Belong To
The Horde eventually, no matter how it gets.
There gently glowing blue mushrooms Sprout from the
ancient pillars in the foyer and their spores drift through the
still air and cast, an eerie glow, a soft carpet of spongy,
blue moss muscles, your steps as you walk across the hall to a
curtain of vines which hangs over a doorway to an inner
chamber. Human woman stands in front of
the curtain holding a staff. Her hair is plated into many
braids and piled on her head in an elaborate style threaded with
bits of bone and Eautiful detritus.
She looks at you with a pinched expression says, who are you?
Please State your business. The chancellor is very busy.
Good evening. I am.
You still? We're here for an appointment
with Chancellor is Donna. Do you want to say a little bit
more about yourself? Yeah.
Like, I think, my character definitely born into it.
I am very into the whole like I'm very ambitious, very much
want to climb the ranks. I I think of Mike There is kind
of being into the whole like management stuff, so like,
Synergy and like the secret and shit like that.
Oh, wow, and your companions. Okay, hello.
My name is Iggy and we're here for an appointment with the
Trunk Club. I took everything that I that I
built my character completely off of like dice rolls.
From the book, which is like the old-fashioned way because
partially I'm lazy. Mmm.
So my character Iggy is a Civic Hybrid so she was not born into
but she was nearly murdered by a Medusa one time.
Well oh yeah. And then every time you're
merely murdered by the juice so you just gotta come.
Oh man. Oh man I gotta be near this.
Yeah no I mean it was very much like love at first sight and and
she loves reptiles so it was like lady with snakes on her
head. Gotta Give me some of that but
then it Not to be a dangerous situation.
Oh, so but you know, everything went smoothly because the lady
was like, you could join the go gauri and that.
Wow, that would be like real funny because you're a simic.
Yeah. Like love at first sight is like
not something you want with a Medusa.
Not exactly. Now me Hey, what up?
I'm Jared. I'm 19.
Do you know how to read? I never fucking learned how to
read. So angry, How Deeply in long you
were just sitting on that. Yeah, you just holding it in
like bursting at the seams. I am Jared and I was born as
well to my I was never born, I Was Born Into The Go Gaara swarm
to my my God, my mom and dad my gob and dad is like and they
named me Jarrod after our beautiful high leader.
Gerard and I aspire to be like him a lich, any anytime that can
happen like I'm just I'm raring to go.
All right and the woman looks down at a list on a clipboard in
her hand and she nods and pulls aside the curtain for you.
Why don't you guys just tell me how did the three of you meet?
How did you guys become a team? Oh, you know, how does anybody
do anything, really? When you think about it, from
what I read about the goal, gauri, it seems like there isn't
exactly like social Rank and you're just sort of assigned
tasks. So we may have just been like oh
this person does this. This is this resistance.
Let's put them together. And yeah, I feel like we were
just assigned to a unit and of course, like, we're part of this
warm. Yeah.
Forget we're gonna listen gonna and we're gonna get along and
cars gonna get along so good. Yeah, and you guys just sort of
distinguished yourselves as a great team and so now you've
been singled out for this assignment.
I'll also, what do you guys look like?
So yeah, isil is dark elf and which we should specify the dark
elves and Ravnica are different than the dark elves in faerun.
The dark elves of Ravnica are known as the dev Karan elves and
there, they don't have the black skin white hair there.
More Sort of in line with the wood elf aesthetic.
Except they all have like dark brown hair and more black hair.
Instead of green hair, which the wood elves and Ravnica have.
Yeah, she's a dark elf. She has hair.
You know like the Gibson Girl. Yeah.
Yeah it's big. She's got big hair.
It's you know up she's got big old shoulder pads and just
wearing a cape nice very good. Sounds great.
All right. Aggie.
Okay. So Iggy is basically like a fish
person. Mmm, she's completely smooth
like a shark in all directions in all directions.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Also, she's got to manta ray
like flaps. Yeah, I know.
Yeah, that come out from her arms and then they like attached
down there. Very, very cool.
Nice. And then she can also spit acid
so your teeth are just rotted. And that's completely rotted.
And she also has her Eternal companion.
Boga, who is the lizard from Revenge of the Sith?
That'll be one rides. Will you describe what that
looks like? Yes, people who may not assessed
with that lizard. Whenever they mentioned start
her, she's like the size of a large Pony.
Okay. She's like green and blue and is
she with you today, gorgeous? Yeah.
She's always with me. She never leaves my side.
Okay. If you and your lizard, Opened
up a tea shop, it would be a Bogut eShop.
Yeah, like that Petit. Yeah, yeah, cat.
Yes. Yes.
We understand cat has a great joke continue.
So Jared is a goblin 3 feet tall.
He is a warranty green-skinned, he is in case any of you were
wondering bald by choice. And you know, he just looks like
kind of like B2B where he is. He's wearing some cool leather
armor. He's got, you know, mushrooms
growing off him. He has a wooden Shield that
shaped like a little mushroom cap.
He has a an aura of spores and you can't see it but you can
definitely smell it. All right, so the three of you,
you walk down a hallway, dimly lit, by more glowing fungus at
the end of which there is a waterfall, which tumbles over
the Broken Walls of the manor and plunges into Rough hole in
the floor to the left of. This is a doorway flanked by two
guards. Equipped in tightness armor.
They cast you sideline, looks as you walk past into the
Chancellor's office. This room is grandly appointed
with much of the salvageable furniture from The Manor,
decorating the space. Any structural issues with the
furniture have been repaired by living structures missing,
table, legs, replaced by small trees, which have been grown
around the rest of the table. Blooms of soft, fur.
Youngest replacing rotting upholstery, that sort of thing,
Rosanna is standing to the right of the room, where there is a
little garden of mushroom varieties, which she is tending.
She's a Dev, Karen Alpha, dark elf with dark brown skin, and
black hair woven into a. Headdress made of the golden
iridescent Caprice of a huge Beetle.
She straightens from her work as you approach turning to give the
three of you in appraising look, Good.
You look prepared. I have a job for the three of
you, right? I've just I'm just ready to get
my marriage Iraq, don't like that here to help.
So it was Donna, she Glides over to her desk and takes up two
vials, which she rolls in her Palm contemplatively before
turning around and handing them to you Jared.
The first vial contains a violently red.
Mushroom about the size of a thin.
The other contains dull Brown spores which are so light, they
swirl in the vial. If you shake it last week, one
of our Scouts finally found the path which leads to the oars of
V. Your mission is to get in and
take as many magical treasures and valuables.
As you can manage to do this, you will use these two
specimens. The first will burrow through,
even the hardest Stone given enough time Once you are in
loose, these spores into the hole of the Vault and let them
settle over the room. Once they have absorbed the
memory of the Vault, they will replicate anything, you remove,
once they are activated, then you are out and the ostentatious
Crohn's in The Syndicate will never know.
Their bobbles are missing. When you are done, you will
deposit them at the Depot in the streets.
Under the Sixth Precinct do well and Guild.
Master Gerard will look Favorably upon you.
Whoa, I can see why you chose us for this assignment.
We won't disappoint you Chancellor.
I'm like really nervous and I'm like now, bungling, the vials.
Because I'm like, holy shit Rod. Eggy like grabs them from you
because you're like juggling. Yeah stuff.
Some inner pocket and says, I've never failed a mission before
and I won't stop now cool. If it's fine.
I like try. Like push my hair back but I'm
bald by choice. Jared, 19 bald by choice.
It's go one of the guards, from the door comes forward and
hands. You guys a map, which shows
where you need to go Andres. Donna says, one more thing only
one of our Scouts made it back from the Vault The Syndicate
guards. Its Treasures.
Well, so you must guard your lives more closely But remember,
even your deaths will serve the horde.
Totally, contrary to die of things.
Die, in the end, of course. All right, and then you are
ushered out of her office. I immediately as soon as we are
like out of the room, I like crumpled into a tiny tiny little
Goblin ball and I'm like, oh my God, Jerrod!
Oh my God, oh my God. Oh yeah, I'm loving the energy
really but you've got the calm down a little bit.
It's going to be fine. My name's take John please.
It only thing is Rhode Island including Gerard and when that
time comes oh my God he's literally a lich.
Like what are you talking about? you're already dead, dude, has
died including Gerard, including me, including you Celia door,
including You, I'm loving this energy happening here right now.
I just want us to take that energy and just focus it in.
This is going to be great. Okay?
Okay, and you're right. Yeah.
Oh my God, I will die. That's for sure.
There's comfort and certainty Jarrett.
I love that. All right, so, all of you have,
of course, spent much of your lives.
Crawling around the undercity and you're familiar with the way
life creeps over death here and how death slowly retakes that
life and how it will retake your life, too.
If you're not careful. The buried remains of buildings
crawl with plants and fungus, which make homes for insects and
rats that skitter into the Unseen places.
The three of you had, deep into the Tangled, Jungle of ruins and
revitalization. It's a grueling Trek through,
rarely trafficked areas of the undercity and more than once.
You note, the movement of a reclusive band of crawl Scouts,
who keep a respectful distance? Once eggy, you lock eyes with
Solitary Medusa not one of the ones belonging to the goal.
Gauri, a wild one, and for a terrible moment, you must ready,
your weapons and spells, but she moves on, and the three of you
do to him just rude. Hey, calm down.
She was just staring, beautiful. Hold it in.
I'm trying to hold her back. Yeah, yeah, I do like, Take your
arm and I'm like, oh my God, I'm like way taller than you.
So yeah. Like a little child clinging to
my dad's fine. The three of you squeeze through
a crack in a stone wall, following your map and come into
a massive chamber stalagmites. Reach up to meet stalactites,
some forming pillars in the chamber.
In front of you. One of these pillars have been
knocked down to form a bridge over a deep Chasm.
On the other end of the room, sewage water falls into this.
Chasm and the Roar of the waterfall, Echoes through the
chamber across the pillar. Bridge is the next tunnel that
you need to go through. Wait, so what's the issue?
Can we do? We not?
Yeah. Can we just walk over the bridge
here to Bridges? Well, I am definitely a fan
favorite. I forgot to mention this about
my character. Have a terrible fear eyes.
I'm afraid that I have a choice now.
Yeah, same style. Well I guess we'll be fucking
perception. Check because a bridge Steve the
bridge. Yeah.
What I perceive the bridge? Okay, I got 16 and tell me about
the bridge. Okay.
Yeah looks like when this bridge was originally knocked down,
there was some structural damage to the pillar.
It might be a little unstable. Oh, oh, I sure would hate to be
someone who requires foot based travel right now and then I grab
the little edges, my cape. And I just, I just flap my way
right up white, what, what tells what?
What? What k for you, where I, why I'm
wearing the cloak of the bat? So you have to use it?
Like like, yes. Like that way.
Yeah. And it's a real item that I
didn't make up, and it sounds like you made it up.
I know it is a real item in that.
You didn't make it up, but it sounds like you made it up.
Well, I fucking didn't, so I'm flapping my way up.
Cat. Is there something across the
bridge like a where you'd need to go?
It's the, the dead pathway of forward is yes.
The bridge there. Like just like something that
like theoretically I could like throw a dagger into though.
There's a lot of stone. I just want to throw the dagger.
Like it doesn't even have to stick it.
Anything. I just need to get it across the
bridge. Make an Athletics check, you
could either dagger. No, you have to throw it, I need
to use it. Yes, I know.
I'm just saying I can carry it over to the other side for you.
No, you're not understanding what's happening.
Okay. Okay, you can try it.
Yeah, you can drive, that's sad. This this, this ruined my life,
giving it to charity. No, I'll I need to use it.
What's, what what, what happens cat, you throw, the doctor, and
it hits the far side of the chasm.
It clinks off the stone and falls into the Ravine.
Okay. Well I call it back because okay
it's a blink dog dagger nice and it comes back to me and
certainly and I want to try that one more time cat, please?
Okay, okay. That is a 21 cat.
Okay, yeah, it doesn't stick into anything but you do throw
it across the cabin, just lands on the ground.
It lands on the ground. I use Misty step to Misty step
to it. Well, which you can do because
it's a which I can do because it's a blink dagger.
Okay? Radical you made it across
Jared. It's time to use my little
levitation shoes, stupid fucking eyes.
I shouldn't have given you guys decide those items.
Uh, I'm now a Altos homes that were like, we need to get across
the river. Yeah, that's the number one.
Like torture item is Ravine. It's true that in the locks door
to I don't have any way to open a locked door.
Yeah, well done. I don't either fuck.
You're going to break into a phone, okay?
Doris / idiots it's really hard on it or basically my shoes, let
me be able to cast levitate on myself so I can I have to go
like Across the bridge, but I'm not touching the bridge.
All right, you did it. You solved my bridge puzzle.
All right, so you move on through that tunnel ahead of you
and you start to feel really lightheaded as you do.
Why don't you all make Constitution saves for me?
19:9, I got 14. Okay, 0, and then it is eggy,
who is not feeling very good. Eggy, you fall to your knees and
you're gonna take my, I've got something.
I've got it, it's time. You take for damage and yeah, it
time yet eggy you will have disadvantage on all of your
roles until you are out of the gas cloud and up ahead of you.
You see that the passage has been blocked by rubble and
debris and there are black blast marks on the wall, which showed
that this blockage is not natural.
What is destroyed? Is it the tunnel ahead?
Yeah, the tunnel ahead. And as you see this blockage in
front of you, There is a series of explosions from behind you.
Jesus. And you are, you are trapped in
this noxious tunnel at rapping. I trap I see trapped in some
sort of a trap. I leaned on Boga.
Um, can I do like a perception? Check to see if there's any
other exit from this area? Sure, I got over 24 perception.
Okay. If you find a crack in the rebel
that you can, like, get your hands.
Roo. Okay, and I do, I, does it feel
like there's open air on the other side?
Yes. Okay.
And that's where we're going. Yeah, sure.
In front of you. Okay.
Are there any like loose feeling rocks towards the top?
Yeah, you're able to pull aside some of them, but not very many.
There's enough for maybe you to get through, but definitely
nobody who's bigger than you. Okay?
We're talking really heavy rocks.
I'm assuming like, more than 10 pounds, the rock.
Yeah. Okay.
Big boulders. I can have Boga help you.
She's He's a good little girl. Yeah, I don't you and boa do it
Boga and eggy who is poisoned by the way, you useless bastards.
Go and climb to the top and try and dig dig through.
Yeah you need him strength role for you and you have
disadvantage and strength all for your lizard.
Yeah. Well that's an 18.
Hmm, that's great. That's a 474 me, Great, poisoned
The Poisoned person. Ha ha.
And my sweet baby. Boga.
Huh, you are not rolling. So hot.
Yeah, she rolled a 6. All right, so the two of you
like crawl claw your way up to the top of this cave in and
starts just started ineffectually.
Paw at the dirt. I have I have like webbed hands
and I'm weak and Boga thinks it's a game.
So she's just mimicking me. Yep.
I don't cast like guidance or anything, but I do shout
visualize your goals. I'm doing my best.
I've been poisoned. You sound exactly.
Li like my ex-husband I can fit through, right?
Yeah you can go, you can get through, I don't know, can I
peek out and see what's on the other side?
You can you peek your head out and are is magical Darkness on
the other side. Ooh, I like that.
Cannot see through it, even with your dark vision.
Well, it's I could definitely cast chromatic, orb.
Basically, I could do a four inch diameter sphere of energy
that. Does 3 D 8 damage and I can
choose the type so I can choose acid damage.
I think that's probably our best bet.
Yeah. Okay.
You want to maybe get Agee out of the way?
Yeah I guess me off. Okay cool.
I pull Aggies little ankles. Okay, my ears are very large
compared to your small tiny Goblin body and pull you by the
toes. Are you guys actually trying to
drag eggy as egging not helping at all?
I'm being taught trap? Oh my God.
Are you quoting him anyway, quit being such a baby about it.
Iggy. Come here, I'll help you every
been over. That's really been boys.
And we've all been poisoned eggy.
Fuck you guys, that's the spirit.
Okay, so I'm gonna, I have a crystal that I'm going to use as
my focus and I'm going to go ahead and cast chromatic, orb,
just rolled Image. Okay cool the 11 I alright,
yeah, that does enough that you melt away the topmost rocks and
you do have to wait for a few minutes while the acid
dissipates and finishes eating through the Rocks but the breath
of fresh air from outside is enough that Eggies poison has
been dispelled. It's not my time today.
Don't worry about the baggy. Maybe next time I can only help.
So you guys climb over the top of the rocks.
No, not yet. Let's have the lizard.
Look Boca does have, blindsight does that see through magical
Darkness? It doesn't rely on visual sight.
Okay, eggy, your, you know, have a hand on this book.
I have like a harness or like, yes, you got your hand on bogus
Car Harness, tell her to go over the rebel, and she starts to go
and you immediately feel her full weight on your arm.
Why don't you make a strength check?
It's like she's falling. Yes 16:16.
Yeah, you're able to hold on to Bogey.
As she scrambles at the completely, empty are outside of
the little cave in hole that you guys manage to do.
It seems that there is nothing beyond that.
Can I do a perception check two cents with my hearing and with
my, you know like you know you can sense that you're in.
Yeah. When you're in like a big room.
Yeah versus throw rock see how far it is.
Yeah I'm gonna do that. Well first I'll throw the rock
went. What does that seem like you, it
takes a long time before you hear it.
It hit something. What if I throw it like forward
as hard as I can? Same thing takes even longer.
Okay. So it's not like there's just a
ravine so my perception check is 21.
Okay. This is maybe like a 40-foot
drop. You do also as you're like
you've got your little hands over the edge of the rock pile.
You feel like maybe there's something carved on the wall
there but you can't. You can't get a good picture of
it carved, like where I'm touching.
Yeah. Like maybe there's a larger
carving that's been disrupted by this cave in.
I can't feel what it is. You only have a three foot reach
so you can't feel the entirety of it, okay?
Which one of us has the longest arms?
I I reach over and I try to feel it out with my little fingies,
it seems like these carvings lead to an indent in the cave
wall, which fifth sized indent. Somebody punched it or like
something fist-sized should fit in there, okay?
Like a fist, like a fish. It might be like something that
I could hold onto like if I tried to climb down.
I guess. Yeah.
Okay. So I'm gonna do something really
quick before anything else happens and I'm gonna cast a
spider. Climb.
Nice on Boga. Oh okay.
So I want to swing down there cat and like try and climb and
put my hand in the. Okay, give me an athletic check.
Okay, that's I pray to God right now.
Just 16. Okay, you swing down and you
stick your hand in and you feel something cold in there.
Like ice cream ice. There's a soft serve ice cream
cone in there. It's not an ice cream cone
Christ. Is it like, is it like a
physical object? Or is it just like a scent?
Like, an old are. It's like an ice cream.
No, it is. It feels like a metal, a cold
metal chain. Can I pull it?
Yeah, you hear a horrible shrieking and the chain comes
loose, make any dexterity check 18, okay?
You are able to keep your grip on the Chain as it comes loose
and lowers you down to the ground.
All the while is, you are descending down this Cliff face,
you hear the Wailing of restless spirits and the clanking of
chains. And why don't you roll an
initiative, all guys, okay? Why all of us?
Yeah. All right.
Oh, that's an at 20. What do you get for Rolling an
at 20 on addiction? You go.
First look in. That's it.
Okay. What did you rescue roll?
I got a five. I got it 12.
So egg, you find the ground underneath your feet and you
feel the cold presence of the indentured spirits of the oars
of Syndicate, those who did not pay their debts, to the skilled
in life, are now forced to serve them in death.
And today they are serving as guards to the Vault and Aggie
because you rolled in that each one.
You get to go first. Okay.
You can't you still magically dark though?
By the way. Okay, so I can't actually see
any you cannot see them. You will be rolling at
disadvantage. Okay, so I want Bogota also
climb down here with me. I can use her as like a second
attack nature Ranger first. I will attack.
Are ghosts the ghosts are they impervious to physical damage?
Cat smiling, so certain types of physical damage goddamn goes oh
I'm gonna throw my dagger at the nearest nearest ghosty.
Okay. Roll to hit and you are at a
disadvantage in this Darkness. That's right.
Natural one. So I don't think I can get lower
than that. No, you cannot, you throw your
dagger into empty are okay. And it, you hear it?
Something in the distance that is not a ghost.
Okay, well I'm gonna go there. Oh yeah, sure.
I'll yeah I'll teleport there. Just for fucking shits and
giggles. What happens to me cat, he
teleport and I'm just in another place.
Okay? At another place you don't dark,
you still have no idea where you are.
So I'm also going to have Boga use the attack bite.
Okay. I'm a ghost.
That's way over 20 and her bite. Is that a piercing damage?
So it is. But it's also an Maybe this
doesn't do anything either but it's also poison damage.
Oh, they're immune to poison makes sense the resistant to
piercing damage they're not immune to piercing that's 10 10?
Yeah. All right, so Bogut has a little
bit of trouble getting her many sharp teeth around this ghost,
but she does manage to lay a little bit of hurt on this
thing. Yeah, I ain't afraid of no
ghosts. All right.
And now it is the ghosts to turn and yep, that's it.
Do what they say. Alright so they are going to go
after they're only available targets eggy and Boga.
Yeah. There's a 13.
Hit Boga does not hit Beau. Catson, I hit Boga and does a 19
hit you absolutely cat. It does hit me.
Okay. All right.
All right, all right, five damage, plus 2 damage.
Okay, Eastfield. It's your turn great.
Okay. So first Stoff reaction talking.
I'm gonna shout down to eggy. How's it going down there?
Eggy eggy has just taken seven damage of ghost necrotic damage
bogus. Doing fine.
So she shouts back up. It's your narrow.
I've been better but I'm doing. Okay.
How are you great? But oh there's ghosts down here
that's just so that you Out there.
There are everywhere and I grabbed a chain and I fell all
the way down. Good bloke you're doing great.
Can you use your stupid fat cape and get down here please?
In a minute I'm thinking about it.
All right, stop thinking and start doing.
Okay so I'm going to. Can I cast a can trip as a level
to spell and expend a spell slot that way I think?
So I can create up to four torch sighs lights within range.
JH and they can hover and stuff. So I'm going to start by sending
a light down to where I heard Eggies voice coming from.
I guess I'll put one 10 feet in front of where we are like above
the chasm and then I'll space the other two as evenly going
down, okay? And then I guess I'm going to
Flap my way down there, all right, now that you're able to
see what's below you from your dancing, beautiful Dancing
Lights. You see that there are Six and
indentured spirits of the oars of Guild.
They are wraith dressed in black cloaks with a golden painted
designs on them and bound with rattling.
Golden chains which symbolize their Eternal servitude to the
orders of Syndicate for the sin of not paying their debts.
Nice. Now Jared I needed, I am 19,
which is older. Among goblins, we reach full age
at home. Anyway, can I like slide down
that chain? Yeah, how close are the ghost to
me? If I do that, they are all
around you. I'm gonna cast.
She little luck. She'll a lie.
Lie lie lie. Sheila log on my weapon.
Okay, and it is now imbued with Nature's power.
And I'm actually not going to come all the way down the chain.
I'm literally just going to be like until I'm within like
scimitars stabbing distance. Sure, yeah, there's one that's
floating up. Close to close enough that you
don't have to come all the way to the ground.
All right. Then I will attack that one so
then I rolled a 22. Okay.
And super hits them. Okay, whoa.
And I got an eight nice to 1010. Okay.
It am it doesn't like that. It screams in pain and rage I
say from the chain. I'm holding on like a little
squirrel. Peggy, its back up to you.
Excellent Hassel Jared, thank you laughs.
It's nice that someone is doing something.
Got fighting. I can see right because of the
ferry fire. Oh you can.
That's funny. I don't want to hear anything
from you. Don't have to get so mad about
it. I want to go for the ghost that
Boga bit and then I'm also going to have Boga B that one again.
Okay? 20 that yeah it's yes 11.
Okay and it is resistant to that so it takes five the ghost now.
Yeah, they're going, they're dose.
All right since all of you are now down there, they are going
to split up and they'll two of them will attack.
Each of you just ten hit your armor class.
Fuck. No it doesn't know.
All right. Ghost.
See, you Hannah eggy. That's a to.
So, ghosts, ghosts going for Jared.
No, come on ghosts. Never had a chance to learn how
to ring. Does 17 take your armor class,
sure does. All right, so that ghost grabs
you with its cold clawed hand and does tend to Chronic damage
to you. Now, it is a seal, so I only
have like one attack that isn't like poison.
In or necrotic which is chromatic orb.
So I guess I'm gonna do that. I pick a random Coast.
All right and let's see just point and shoot ya 11.
That hits need to beat what a great day.
All right cool. What a lovely day.
I wonderful day to be me. 77. All right.
That hurts it. It doesn't like it.
Oh, yeah. And as a bonus action, I'd like
to move my, my orbs of light so that they're dispersed across
the ground down here, okay? Like to move your arms for, you
know what I mean, all right, eggy, all right - all right
Jared, it's me. Okay.
So, So I'm still on my chain. Uh-huh.
And they, but they like came up to get me right.
Yeah, they can float and whatever.
So I'm going to attack the one that's near to me.
Okay, 21 that hits and 8 damage this time.
You destroy this. Go stand by ha ha your Scimitar
shreds through its spectral form.
And with one last dying and somewhat grateful, sounding gasp
it disappears. And now we're back up to eggy
Want to do something cat, you do.
So I because these are Undead creatures, they are and they are
my, my favored enemy. I can actually speak with them.
Oh, so I would like to turn to The Ghost and say, did you see
what just happened to our dear friend?
He was lifted up into the atmosphere and released from his
servitude. Wouldn't you love for that to
happen to you as well? Just stop fighting and we'll
just we're free all The ghosts appear to have no.
Will of their own and do not respond.
God damn you. It's a good try.
All right. Well, then in that case, I guess
I'm a against my him and I, with a rageful battle cry, and it
sounds kind of like I go and, and / or pierced 21. 21 hits.
So that's four plus three sets. Seven days.
All right. You destroy that goes.
Yeah. So we have five left.
Do you have four left? So then I'm also going to have
Boga attack another go. Okay, I'm gonna go for one of
the one, the one that looks the least.
Happy. Yeah.
Well, one that looks most beat-up, most beat-up.
Yes, they don't. None of them look happy.
Yeah. They're always Dentures slaves.
That's really fair. Yeah, so bogus gonna go for that
one. Okay.
That's a lot more than eleven way, then it hits 20 something
and that's eight eight total. So by half, that's for, yes.
And that destroys that ghost. So now there are only three
ghosts left and the ghosts. All as one rattled together and
let out a raspy breath, as the light comes back to this chamber
and as the darkness clears, you see in front of you an enormous
square of stone that is suspended from the ceiling above
your favorite, a deep Canyon. I got a theme here, that is
suspended over a deep Canyon by huge chains on the ground
nearby. There are the corpses of
four-goal gauri Scouts broken and bloody and cold but those
aren't important right now. What is important is the
remaining indentured Spirits are gathered around a guardian.
Giant wearing a helmet with the Sigil of the oars of Syndicate
who stands Entry in front of the Vault, he lets out a bellowing
roar, which makes the whole Cavern shake and then charges,
welcome. Hi guys.
Happy Hanukkah. So we'll be back at it again,
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But this time, we decided to bring you a special new wild and
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I also want to send a message to the one and only Chantal with
whom, I went to eat Thai food with whom.
I watched an episode of altered carbon, which I didn't really
like I'm sorry if you like that show wasn't my thing with her.
Discussed my life and you know, my Joy's my pains, I love you
Chantelle, the code word is damn it.
I love you Shannon. And you know what since your
sleeper agent you know what to do?
So he is gonna charge for will go with you again.
Yay. Mayonnaise is this guy's a like
an actual Giant and actual literal giant?
Okay. But he's not a ghost, not a
ghost. Thank God.
He takes damage like a normal giant taken giant.
Over a ghost. Any fucking day.
Yeah. That's a 24 to hit.
Yes. Cat.
That does in fact hit 17 damage. Oh great.
Why does Catholic excited right now?
He gets three attacks what hits you with the first one to twenty
eight. So that will hit 28.
We're gonna die. Well, he did just roll a 2.
So that's this 12. And that does not hit, you know,
there you go. So so that one will be 14
damage, he attacks with a spear. He has an enormous spear also
engraved with the or azov symbol which he uses to attack heh.
Whose turn is next is yours. Okay, cool, cool.
You see all this up. So I think I'm gonna cast a ray
of enfeeble moment. Okay.
Ooh, is that a 19? That is 19?
Fuck. Yes.
Okay so that's a 19 and that's plus my bonus.
So that's over 20 that'll hit. Okay.
Cool. And then on a Hit the Target
deals only half damage with weapon attacks that use strength
until the spell ends. And the duration is a minute.
But since combat turns only six seconds.
Yeah, that's a while. Yeah, yeah, that's my turn.
That's a really good. All right, so he all of his all
of his attacks are going to be do half damage now, which is
very good for all of you and now it's Jared Jared.
Okay, I'm gonna heal eggy, do you need to be healed right?
Oh hell yeah, so I'm gonna come touch you and Duke your wounds.
It's seven plus eight which is 15 cribbage.
Cribbage, the only reason to do math my childhood, it was.
And is this back up to eggy? I'm gonna go for the weakest.
Looking ghost with my short sword.
Okay, 15 that'll hit. So that's six totals total.
Yeah, that kills it. Oh, fuck, yes.
How do you kill it? Tell me how you kill it.
I take my short-sword. I stick it right into the ghosts
like little face and it crumbles in on itself.
Like Sauron very cool. So bogus gonna go for the next
most damage looking ghost and Boga got an insane number Boga
got 28. That is great.
Yeah then Focus gonna do Bocas damage, all right, Bogut does
eight total damaged. Okay, so for now, it is the
ghosts turn. There's two ghosts, one goes, Is
going to go for Jared. Oh and that is a 18.
Yeah that hits. Okay.
And that is nine damage you seal you does a 12 here a clock.
Yeah, it does. Okay.
Six damage. All right.
Okay. And then it is your turn son of
his shield or you crazy kids Blair, right?
I'm Caitlin Caitlin started in my fault.
All right, cool. To finally, fucking raised a
dead raised that Dad. Yeah.
Yeah, boy, I'm all about. But yeah, I'm gonna go ahead and
raise the strongest dead soldier that I see on the ground.
All right? Human fighter.
He's got a long sword. Cool.
So, my spell will imbue the target with a foul mimicry of
life, raising it as an undead creature.
So they're zombies. If I'm choosing a corpse which I
am, you know me. I know you're cool.
So I want to say something cool. Yes, like remember to recycle
ha. Ha ha.
So now he has a turn. I can use a bonus action on each
of my turns to command it, so I guess I'll have him.
Go ahead and attack one of those.
All right. Oh, that's a 20.
I like it. I was confused when I looked at
it and I was like that doesn't. Why is that three looks so big
roll double damage? 4 plus 6. 10.
All right, so that's 5 damage, because it's all ghosts.
It's like got me there. There it is.
A ghost. All right, now it's Jared.
I'm thinking about Jerrod my spiritual Dad.
I think about my real mom and dad my God and Dad and I'm just
like getting really pumped. That's really, that's great.
Visualization, really proud of you, you know, I'm only 19 and
And I, I think I want to live a little bit longer before I
become new life in the form of mushrooms.
So, I'm gonna do a really cool circle of spores Druid thing and
it's called symbiotic entity. So basically, I use an action
and when you use of my wild shape ability to gain, 24
temporary hit points, nice and it, lasts 10 minutes, I get some
double damage on some certain things and I get 1.
Six poison damage extra okay. And because I am a little
Goblin. I have Nimble Escape.
So I'm gonna disengage, hey, which I can do without provoking
and talk about opportunity. Nice.
As a bonus action. Very good.
Now, it's the Giants turn. John's gonna talk where it's
really Gonna Hurt Giants gonna tuck Boga.
I knew it son of a bitch bastard.
So that is a 24 Set hit bogus. Insane on the cuff.
It does hit bogus. Okay, that's a 27.
Yes cat. I'm just gonna roll the head a
third time. That's an 18.
Yes. Okay.
B14 Manitou. 300 people met. Yeah.
That's 72 that 3 so there you go.
Seven plus three plus six and now it's back to eggy.
So I'm going to actually use my turn to cast cure.
Wounds on my sweet cake iboga. So she's up to 17 from 24.
That's so bad. Yeah, and she is going to attack
the last Ghost to Ghost. There's still two ghosts.
God damn it. Yeah.
She's going for the one that's still alive.
There's the one that's I'm sorry.
She's going for that. She's going for the one ghost
that's left cat. There's to go.
She's going for the one that's left.
There still to Sugar over the one that's been hurt.
Okay, and she's gonna, she's gonna bite him, okay?
Don't find him real good 17 now that it's okay.
Nine damage totally for and that kills the ghost.
Yeah, I was so killed two ghosts, though.
Got rips its head off of its ghost body.
Nice. And then it just, like goes
back. Yeah, it's on a yo-yo.
Nice. Alright, now you're down to one.
Ghost one, giant, and it is the ghost turn.
The ghost is gonna go after a seal but to not eat.
Want what the fuck? Oh shit.
So that is going to be 13 damage.
All right over there. You know, no, you know, no, is
it my turn? It is your turn.
Oh my God. All right, so I got my little
thrall. Just nice to have so, I think.
Yeah. So if I do a rafting earth, like
that's going to be a 20 foot Cube centered on a point.
Can I do that without it? Like, getting us 20 feet, send a
big now that I think you, I think you're fine because Boga
was last attacking a ghost, right?
Yeah, we haven't attacked the The giant.
Okay cool. Then I'm gonna go ahead and do
erupting Earth. I choose a point with on the
ground Earth and stone erupted, a 20 foot Cube centered on that
point each creature. In that area must make a
dexterity saving throw. He got a 2 and that's plus 3.
So that's us. We do five, nice.
He's not a very fast boy. Cool.
So then he's going to take 3D 12 bludgeoning damage 1616.
All right so yeah I'm gonna go ahead and have my thrall get
That goddamn ghost. Okay, well only real, the
fucking 3. So it's Jared's turn.
All right, I'm now I'm just like full of spores.
I smell shitty as hell. I'm very fungal feel like by go
gauri standards. That might be good.
Yeah, I like guys are probably like, what?
Like, damn there. That's fair musky.
I want it. I think I need.
Do you need healing? You guys both need healing.
Huh. On my way though, I'm gonna go
I'm gonna run past the giant because a small creature you
could like run between its legs. You can go through the same
space as he is. Yeah and then because I'm within
10 feet of him my spores are going to deal in town with an
ace. That's fucking incredible and
because I cast my thing, it does double damage nice wow.
So that's going to be 7 damage to him.
They run past nice, nice. And then I'm going to just
because I smell so so bad. And then He's just, he's undone.
I think it's, I think it must be psychic damage because he can't
believe that I smell. Yeah, he's driven insane by
Bell. Good to know.
It's like when people smell that that like pickled canned fish
from Sweden. Yeah.
Anyway, so then I'm going to run over to seal and that's gonna
do. That's 11,000.
Thanks Jared. Yeah, no problem.
I'm pumped. What is that perfume?
Beautiful. It's my natural musk.
Oh, you're killing it. It's the Giants turn.
Yeah, and giant is gonna let see Jared ran through his legs.
So he's gonna go for you. Gera disengaged with him.
They see. You can still come after you.
Disengage giant. I didn't ask to be part of your
narrative giant. Yeah he's gonna throw his Spear
and Toward does a 23 hit, ok, now, it doesn't hit.
I know it does. Yeah, don't lie to me, son,
don't lie to me, Jared, whatever.
So that is going to be 7 damage, right?
Cool tis. But a scratch, he's just not
able to throw it so good. He's feeling a little feeble.
We're back up to eggy. OK.
All the ghosts are dead. I didn't hit the ghost.
I didn't have to ghost either. Okay, you guys take out the go
Segi Bank hit the ghost with my short sword.
All right, that was a good. It was 18 base so that it can't
see. Yep. 7 damage.
That ghost is still alive. God dammit.
OK. Boga goes after the fucking goes
goes, get kill. His goddamn goes, Boga hits nine
and it kills it. How does how does so kill it?
Boga takes her big little her claws.
He's and like, if you guys ever seen a turtle, eat food.
No. So what they do is, they
basically bite into Ooh, the like it's just one end of it and
then they take their claw and like dig their claws all the way
through. And then, rip the body in half
and throw it. So that's what Bogut does to
this ghost. You've defeated all the ghosts.
Damned ghost. All right, blasted.
You're fucked of the ghosts, the ghosts have been busted and now
it is just you and a big angry giant is Seal.
What are you gonna do? I'm gonna serve some executive
realness. Yeah, so I guess I'll just go
ahead and cast chromatic orb. But this time, I'm gonna cast it
with a level 3 spells lat. Okay.
Um so that's 18, plus 6. Now that'll hit sweet 18, how is
that fucking taste taste? Bad.
That bad mouth. Feel taste, bad, bad.
Battlefield taste like that fish.
Tastes like that fish. Yeah, giant does not love that
but it's Jared's. Turn actually, it's always the
wrong turn. Oh, I'm bad.
All right, here we go. Go and get them thrall and so
15. Is that girl?
That just not hit really. It's a giant.
All right. And you're embarrassing me
thrall. Yeah, the thrall, each week,
Undead arms. The sword just sort of pings off
of the Giants. Tough skin.
Come on. What is that?
All right, Jerry. So I think, I think I'm gonna
come heal, my friend Aggie. Again, 10 damage or 10 healing
and healing damage. I'm resistant.
The healing touch. All right, and now it's the
Giants. Turn the Giants.
Going to turn its gaze to a seal, you seal.
Are you ready? I'm fucking ready.
Does it 16 hit your arm across? What do you think?
I don't know. Yeah.
What about a 15? Yes.
What about a 21k? Oh man.
He rolled so bad total of nine reduced by half is for, all
right? And now it is Equis turn.
Okay, I'm gonna, okay, so I'm gonna get behind him.
I guess I don't have to go in front because she has a higher
Armor class. Does that mean we both get
Advantage? Yeah.
Okay cool. 15 that doesn't hit next.
Oh God. Oh God, it's 14. 9:23 that'll
hit 11 plus. He needs to make a constitution
save. I'm sure.
He'll do it. 10:00. He rolled a four.
He didn't. Is he ready to receive bogus?
Amazing. Insane damage.
Yeah, it's 19. Whoa.
Yeah. She when you don't make the save
for the Constitution, she does 3 D6 poison damage in addition to
her other damage. It feel you're up.
All right. Maybe I'll maybe I'll try the
vampiric. Touch because what the hell,
right? Yeah.
You know, why not? Let's just get crazy with it.
So melee spell attack, so these pain and aha, 19 bad like that.
Okay. So basically the touch of my
hand can siphon force from others to heal my wounds, nice.
So he'll take 3 D6 necrotic damage.
So teen, I'll have those four points of damage back idiot.
All right, the giant does not like that.
He gives a roar of pain. So, yeah, I'm gonna have my
thrall attack. That's an a T20.
No, wow, for damage to six damage, this, this guy's on
fire. So, I'm going to command my
thrall to climb up that giant. Like he's a big old tree.
Like he's a beanstalk, like a fuck.
Beans Jared you're up. Yeah.
So if I catch jumbo myself, can I just jump on his like hey
yeah. I mean, I can't stop you from
doing that. Yeah.
Jared could only be Jared. It could only be if I die, I
die. Yeah.
So I can't jump. Okay, and then I'm just gonna
jump right up onto the Giants little shoulder, okay?
And then what and wink. That's my action, that's it,
okay? I mean he will take damage from
me being near his face. That's true.
So that is six total damage. Okay so then it is the Giants.
Turn the giant has has like zombie crawling on him and a
tiny Goblin there is face that smells really bad so small he is
gonna stumble back away from the This fight.
It's all these people on the ground which I think gives all
of you an attack of opportunity because he is trying to
disengage. Yeah you too and a lizard for
for me. Okay.
Doesn't it Boga hits. Okay, that's all that matters.
My beautiful lady, I trained her up.
Yeah I trained on real gun raised her from a little baby
lizards plus. He has to do a constitution safe
and make him do that, consti save one, t one, okay well that
works but he still takes Image. Okay, 14 damage and I'm an
idiot. And just figured out that
vampiric touch is really cool because you can make the attack
again on each of your turns, as an action 17 really know.
Yeah, that's rough. So the giant takes some some
damage and he is going to swat at Jared by his head as he
stumbled back. But I guess that is a 24.
Ha ha ha. So he does hit, wow.
Also, I speak giant. So I'm like, what the heck,
dude. Hey, it's my job.
I'm in debt. Oh no, we're gonna kill this
guy. Then the course of Syndicate
gets his ghost. So I'm fine with that oof.
All right, so he only does to damage to you.
Ouch. I hold on.
Yeah you hold on. Damn it is a key.
I'm gonna run up /. It is little feet.
Okay. 20 paddle hits that's 66 damage.
Okay, well we're gonna talk to you.
Oh yeah, you know Boga is gonna snap as little toesies.
Okay, 21 that'll hit okay, nice you guys watch me go through
that Master. I was like watching that me my
orderly exactly what I was thinking, okay, nice, 10 damage.
From her bite. Okay, you'll need to make a
constitution savings. That's 20.
So he takes 15 damage total. He is not a happy looking boy.
Good. And now it does, it feels turn
if I don't get a turn when I'm on top of this giant always so
mad sometimes that's just the way the cookie crumbles.
Yeah, well I'm going to go ahead and try to get some use out of
this vampiric touch. So 1919 will hit cool. 11 plus
so 1313. All right, I'm sorry.
Jared As your, your touch drains, the last of the Giants
life force, he falls to his knees with a groan and then
falls down dead on the cave floor.
I jump off real high cuz I still have jump on me.
I jumped so funny. Hi I can completely ignore what
Jared's doing. I do a flip immediately.
Say I do. I know I do back is pretty
adorable animate him. Do it.
Do you know I can do it. Let's not draw eyes.
I'll and with like my my hands in the air like a, the gymnast?
Yeah. Well, let's not get too hasty.
I mean, let's let's think about this.
I use fungal infestation to bring him to bring the zombie
back to life with one hit point. All right, what does he say?
Hey buddy. I say he gets back up.
I'm serious. Sorry about you on a motorcycle.
So I'm not. All right, dude.
Now let's go into that Vault. So the Vault once again is
suspended over this Canyon by big thick chains.
Okay. Is it like a big box or is it
like an open floor? Know, it's a big box.
Okay, wait. So what are magic potions do
again? You have one mushroom that will
drill through the Vault and one mushroom that will replicate
anything that you take from The Vault, okay?
Yes, okay. I cast fine traps.
No, you don't see any traps and does it have like a door?
Then that's locked or what's you don't see a door from the
ground? Well, I don't need to be on the
ground, so so you fly up to see. Yeah, I'm gonna get a little
flap, even it flap up, so that I can investigate the various
sides of this Vault and I'm just laughing maniacally.
Yeah, you're back. Y'all are, it's the goal gauri
way. All right, you find at the top
of the The Vault, there is an big metal door with a big
complicated looking lock on it and above that when you look up,
you see, there's another similarly locked door.
You can actually see the mechanisms of the lock from
underneath, but it looks like that is the entrance to the this
room, where there is, this Vault, presumably, they have a
ladder. Mmm.
So we just need our good good, mushroom boy.
So I guess I'll call down jackpot.
Can you jump up? Yeah, I can jump over.
Okay. All right.
What's the distance like diagonally from me to throw my
dagger up there? I wasn't at 20.
Okay, I do it. I do it.
You tell your dad grew up on top, but incredible distance.
Yes. And then I teleport to my
dagger, all right, and I'm On Top, you are on top and I also
have the, the seeds and the Giants.
The undead giant his hanging out, so let's put the mushroom.
Like on top of the Vault, you place the mush.
Shroom on to the door of the Vault and it just sits there for
a minute because they'd had does not have magic powering it.
I some questions and give it my Spore energy.
Alright, chaotix for energy. Yeah.
All right. So you give it your sport energy
and it blooms into an aggressively red-capped
Toadstool about the size of a manhole cover and as the cap
spreads. Oh, With the veil, beneath it
rips and releases a multitude of pink spores, which settle onto
the surface of the Vault, there's the noise of grinding
stone and then the mushroom falls into the circular hole
that is created in the vault. Just big enough for the three of
you to wriggle through. Well big enough for the two of
you to wriggle through and one of you to just jump in easily.
Inside the vault is a neatly organized.
Hoard of treasure. There are chest full of gold.
Each one marked with How much it contains there are shelves with
beautiful items, made of precious metals and inlaid with
gemstones, and the titles, and the values listed underneath
some of these pulse with powerful, Magics and neat, and
tidy, or zov, scribes have listed the effects of each item
for you. I open.
I take out the second file and I open it, and I shake the little
spores across the room. Alright?
Spores settle over everything in the room and take in a imprint
of what Is there. So that once you have taken the
item, a mushroom will grow into the exact size and shape of the
item that was taken. Art.
Did any of the items have effects that would make it
easier to like carry stuff out. Like, is there a bag of holding
in here? There is a bag of holding it
nice. Yeah boys.
Let's start shovelin shit in that bag of holding know.
It sounds legit. Yeah, I Hold It Wide.
Open you boys. Oh yeah, get it in.
Well, we're doing that. If there are any like nice Wine
glasses or anything like that. Like, I'll keep my eyes peeled.
Oh yeah. There's a nice set of, like,
crystal decanter with matching glasses.
I make a mental note. Later, are there any like little
lizard figurines? Sure.
Yeah. Oh, cousin.
Is there any Gerard merch? There's no Jerrod merch.
I'm afraid. So tragic, man.
You guys these people don't know style and then I like, I like
open up my armor and I'm wearing a shirt with drawers face on it.
Like this is style, sure. Have that right fashion?
Sharon, I don't know. These glasses are pretty nice.
Yes, I did. Like these lizards.
I like open my my shirt further, and it says, Jerrod Lich of the
go. Gauri on it.
I say, what is the say? It says, I fought really easy to
extend back. Nice, one like my five.
I'm not. And I'm like, man.
That's so true. True.
Good morning. My little leather armor.
Backup. All right, so you guys raid this
Vault, and after you're done Jared, you are able to activate
the spores and in the place of everything that you've taken.
You see, a fungal form, take shape and then solidify into an
exact replica of what you've just stolen.
Nice. I got the way we came.
Okay, so you guys, you get back down before you guys can leave.
If you want this giant to come with you, he has to make it up a
40-foot drop. While there's a chain, there is
a chain. I can also cast spider climb on
him before before we cast spider, climb on him.
We need to give him a name. He's your all you should name
him and don't think that I'm going to clean up after him
either. No, see you don't have very
large pimps remix. Cute.
Say that word, one more time, Caitlin, he'll have very large
pubes. Any better?
So I just like I just shut down my mind to hearing that I don't.
So I look at my beautiful giant. Who's my son?
My boy, my special little guy and I think what are their
names? What is it?
What are some names? Eames spot Clifford.
Hmm Spike. I know you guys.
This guy's name is gonna be see red.
Why am I not surprised Jared Jared It could only be Jared All
right and you guys make it back, you get to that little crack in
the wall that you came through to get to this path and it's
weird how like Jared is our friend, but like he's super
dead. I don't look at him and I see
myself and several years and I feel nothing but compact.
Thanks. Thank God, It's Friday.
I'm all right. Yeah, what are y'all doing this
weekend? I'm just like, you know, gonna
like hang out at the grave of my mom and dad are my lion.
Nice patch of dirt just to see what it's like.
Oh, my uncle actually has a rot Farm.
Oh, I was thinking of having like a wine tasting, if you guys
are interested. Oh man.
Yeah, I never had wine before love to try some.
It's like, I always say Never drink wine.
Except when I'm bored. I'm tired or thirsty or happy.
It's a seal, you're holding a wine glass, right now.
I have you been drunk this entire time?
Well, a lady never tells. All right, so you guys head to
the depot under the Sixth, the district.
This is where you were sent to drop off your illicit horde from
outside. You would never pick this
building out from the rubble and ruined around it, except for the
Medusa standing outside with her arms crossed talking to a man in
a ragged black cloak, the Medusa tall and buff with daggers
strapped to her, legs hisses at the man and he shrinks back then
hands. Her a bag full of coins while
grumbling. Medusa ways, the bag in one
hand, the knots and motions over her shoulder to goblins, come
out dragging a chest. They open it and show a small
horde of valuables and magic items.
The man inspects them nods. And then to buff tough men who
were idling nearby, come forward, shut the lid of the box
and haul it off, and the Medusa, then turns her terrifying and
gaze to the three of you and says hey you three.
No loitering. What do you want Iggy starts to
feel heart. Palpitations because This is the
most beautiful creature that she's ever laid eyes on.
Yeah. I will say that if I could sweat
that I'd be sweating. I'm Jared. 19.
I say. So I'm gonna I'm gonna elbow of
Iggy and be like play it. Cool.
Okay. I'll try desperately but I
cannot make any promises. What?
Actually here at the see a Chancellor is Donna.
We've brought something for her. Hello.
Do you come? They're often their eggy relax
your whack here. Quite a bit.
Hold, I'm so sorry. Hold it in.
I have this bag. I pull out the bag of holding
the Medusa, takes the bag from you and gives an appraising not.
And she says I Chancellor's not here, but she told me you'd be
coming. This is a great help and she
motions over her shoulder. And the two goblins who had
carried out that chest carrying an empty one and she just
upturns the bag Bag of holding into that chest and there's a
comedic lie, long, pause as that your various stolen items.
Come out High all talking about the gesture.
Yep and she has to get another chest hauled in.
Yeah, nice this repeats a couple times and she nods and has the
Goblins haul, all of this back into the depot.
And as as they as the Goblins, pulled the chests inside, you
catch a glimpse into this Depot and you see a horde of the Last
horde of magic items that are stored inside and the Medusa
grins. When she sees that, you guys are
looking. She puts her hands on her hips
and says you see that that's what the future of the goal guy.
Looks like my friends soon Ravnica will know the true power
of the things they push off to live in the shadows soon.
They will see the true might of our swarm.
So that is it for us. You guys, thanks so much to
Wizards of the Coast and the D20 Dame's for inviting us to be
part of this awesome project and event.
Also make sure you check out the guild Masters Guide to Ravnica
when it's released. I also want to tell you one more
time. Make sure you go check out cold
presses, midgard sagas. If you don't know about the
midgard setting, it's basically a really cool magical setting to
play D&D in. That is based on like kind of
Norris. Mythology, and, and kind of
different kind of different cultural Roots than faerun
traditionally has. And so, if you're interested in
playing in that world, midgard sagas is a new collection of
Adventures set in midgard sagas, in midgard.
You could say the book contains Adventures again for levels 328.
So, you know, after you've gotten started and you're kind
of in the thick of things, this would be a really great.
Things to play one shots with or to plop them into your campaign.
They run four to six hours and they are packed with cool dope
stuff. So head on over to kobold
press.com to learn more. Thank you so much for listening
to our very special episode, stay warm out there.
If you're in the north and Northern Hemisphere just stay
chill. If you're in the Southern
Hemisphere and if you're not Equator, stay sweet.