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Hello and welcome to this 
special Christmas edition of the

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Water Rd podcast. 
I'm at the National Waterways 

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Museum at Ellesmere Port in 
Cheshire, where Santa Claus is 

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in residence and the elves are 
running boat trips for the 

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children. 
So, Missus Claus, I reckon you 

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must have the most important job
here today, because you're not 

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only looking after the children,
but you're looking after Santa 

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himself, aren't you? 
I'm very, very busy today. 

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There's lots of excited children
got on the boat. 

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When they get back, we shout, 
Are you ready, Santa Claus? 

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And hopefully he's finished 
playing with the reindeer. 

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He's tied them all up safely and
he's sitting in his armchair 

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waiting for the children to have
their presents. 

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And of course he will be, 
because you'd have sorted him 

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out, weren't you? 
Well, I'd hate to say anything 

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about men who are quite slow at 
times, but Father Christmas is 

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getting a little old and you do 
have to chivvy him along at 

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times. 
And he loves his cup of tea. 

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But he will be ready. 
His beard is trimmed and 

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sparkling, he's got his hat 
ready to put on, reindeers are 

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looking stunning, and yes, he's 
going to be ready for the first 

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children off the boat. 
And are they usually quite 

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excited when they get off the? 
Boat. 

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Oh, bubbling. 
Absolutely bubbling. 

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They can't wait to get through 
the curtain. 

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We have to slow them down. 
And then they go in and their 

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eyes just pop because the grotto
looks exciting and lovely. 

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Some of them are a bit 
spellbound. 

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Grannies and granddads love it 
because they're remembering all 

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the times they went to see 
Father Christmas. 

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Mummies and daddies are making 
sure that the children really 

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enjoy it. 
It's just exciting for 

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everybody, including me. 
I really love it. 

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It's really good. 
And there's Mother Claws coming 

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from the North Pole just once a 
year to meet all these wonderful

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children. 
It's really, really fun. 

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So it must be quite important 
the the museum here to Santa and

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to Ute for you to spend such a 
lot of time here. 

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Well, we've traditionally had 
Santa here for many years now 

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and the the idea of he comes 
here is known in the 

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neighbourhood and with thanks to
all the social media then of 

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course he's known far and wide, 
lots of Santa's. 

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But we think we've got the best 
by far. 

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We've certainly got the only 
boat ride, haven't we? 

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And in other times of the year, 
I mean, have you been to the 

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museum before, Mrs Claus? 
Well, yes, of course, because in

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the summertime, when I'm not 
needed to help make the 

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presents, I come down and I like
to go and have a look at the 

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cottages. 
There are four of them. 

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They're in different time zones,
so they hark back to when the 

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port was really, really busy, 
because of course it wasn't 

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Ellesmere Port until the canals 
came. 

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It was a little village, and 
then they decided that the 

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canals would come here to 
complete the journey from the 

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ship canal latterly. 
But originally the boats used to

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sail up the Mersey and through 
past a tiny little lighthouse. 

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You would wonder how they could 
see it and the bottom basin, as 

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we call this big expanse of 
water at the bottom here, would 

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be full of sailboats. 
And that's something that the 

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children don't always realise 
because we say it would be full 

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of boats and then really you 
have to take them back in time 

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because it's hundreds of years 
old. 

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The first cottages were built in
the 1830s, so you can imagine 

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how much development they've 
seen. 

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And of course, the port built up
as the as the boats happened 

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until the trains came and took 
all the custom away and it 

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slowly slid into decline. 
But we're having great 

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anniversaries because of course,
the boat museum has been going 

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for many years now. 
And then they built up the 

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wonderful collection of boats 
that we have here now. 

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So Nigel, you're one of the 
skippers of the boats and yes, I

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gather you do the trips all year
round? 

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We do the Christmas ones. 
Must be a bit special. 

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Well, they are because Christmas
time is a special time anyway. 

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So are we trying to make it fun 
for the, for the kids and also 

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the parents as well? 
Because they all, because I 

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mean, last trip we had three 
kids and nine parents. 

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So, so everybody enjoys Amelia's
very good at getting them all 

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singing and, and stuff like 
that. 

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So it's good, good, good, good 
fun. 

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Are they the noisiest trips of 
the year? 

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Yes. 
Without a doubt. 

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Without a doubt. 
But that we don't mind that. 

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Have they ever managed to drown 
out the noise of the boat 

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engine? 
No, no, it's always, it's always

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there in the background. 
So yes, three cylinder Lister, 

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sort of a a traditional canal 
boat engine, but three cylinders

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is is something a bit special. 
And tell me about the boat, 

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because it's doesn't look narrow
enough to be a narrow. 

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Boat. 
It isn't. 

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It isn't. 
It's 9 foot 6 wide and the gaps 

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we've got to go through 11 feet,
so it's quite a tight fit to 

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going through, up the canal 
through the the slip, the 

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slipway bridge and also the M53 
bridge as well. 

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So why is this boat that width 
then? 

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It was, it was built here 
actually over in the boatyard 

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over there or 1970s, probably 
80s, I'm not quite sure when it 

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was built for this situation. 
And then because originally it 

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could take 60 passengers and 
that brings in all sorts of 

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requirements, insurance and, and
registration and stuff like 

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that. 
So we're now running it with 

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volunteers with a maximum of 12 
passengers. 

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So it's, it's quite big for that
number of passengers. 

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But it it you know there's 
plenty of space there for them 

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to create havoc. 
Because you'll have to have your

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proper licence too. 
We do, so if you help want a 

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helmet boat, you have to go 
through a a Houndsman's Cats 

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certification process. 
And what's the most difficult 

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bit of the trip? 
Is it getting through the 

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bridges or is it turning round 
at each end? 

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It depends on the weather turns 
on the weather. 

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Today there's not a breath of 
air, so turning and winding is 

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quite easy. 
So the most difficult bit is is 

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the going to the bridges when 
it's windy, the northwesterly 

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wind coming straight through 
there from straight off the 

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Mersey, straight off the Irish 
Sea, that can be a bit naughty. 

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Or like it was on yesterday, it 
was a southeasterly wind and 

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that created all sorts of 
problems winding at the top end.

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So yeah. 
But you enjoy the challenge. 

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Oh gosh, yes, yes, and. 
Even in the back, we've got 

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everything ready. 
Yeah. 

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Are we ready to? 
Just one Earth. 

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That we wish. 
You Merry Christmas. 

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Everybody 321, we wish you a 
Merry Christmas. 

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We wish you. 
A Merry. 

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Christmas, we wish you a Merry 
Christmas and a Happy New Year. 

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So, Father Christmas, you're all
geared up for the arrival of the

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kids then, are you? 
Oh yes, I've I've said every 

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year I do this and it's so 
brilliant to see the kids coming

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in. 
And how excited are they 

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usually? 
Oh, they're very excited when 

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they get off the boat. 
They've been on there with a few

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hours and they're wound up, 
appropriately wound up. 

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And they're very joyous and they
come up along shrieking and they

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can't come through the the 
curtains quick enough and. 

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Have you noticed that kids 
always ask for particular things

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from you? 
They're usually primed by their 

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parents as to what they're 
likely to get, which is really 

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nice because then they get what 
they want. 

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They come in and they select a 
presence and then they come and 

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see me and show me the presents 
and I sort of ceremoniously 

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present it to them. 
So Ellesmere Port must be quite 

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important to Santa then, as 
you're spending such quite a lot

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of time here. 
This museum is very important to

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me. 
Well, I'm not doing Santa then. 

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I'm on one of the boats. 
I got my wide beam boat 

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certificate two years ago. 
We went out a few years ago and 

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it was I stopped when I was at 
the front of the boat with a 

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great big pole smashing the ice 
so we could take the kids up and

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down the canal. 
Do you? 

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Want to tell me what you've been
doing say? 

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Yik Thug. 
Have you been? 

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Able to sleep. 
Should we see? 

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Should we shout? 
So on the count of three, we 

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have to shout. 
Are you ready, Santa Claus? 

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OK, Loud. 
Yeah, 1/2. 

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Are you ready? 
Santa Claus. 

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So you're all just back from the
from the boat trip. 

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What did you make of it it? 
Was very good. 

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Singing. 
And everything, mate. 

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Wonderful. 
Did you manage to find all the 

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things that the elves had lost? 
Yes, we found them all. 

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We had the bells and everything.
Yeah. 

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And the mites. 
Couldn't spell all of them but 

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that's OK, we still found them. 
I suppose you you probably 

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enjoyed it because you remember 
doing this sort of thing years 

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ago. 
Right. 

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Yes, yes. 
So wonderful. 

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In a few moments, we'll be 
hearing memories of Christmases 

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Afloat from some boating 
friends. 

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But first, I wanted to say thank
you for making the first series 

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of the Water Rd such a success. 
I really do appreciate you 

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listening, following, and 
sending your comments. 

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The podcast will be taking a 
break until the spring, so 

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please make sure you follow or 
subscribe depending on where you

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get your podcasts from so you'll
be alerted when the new series 

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starts in March. 
But now back to Christmas and 

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stories of the festive season on
the Cut. 

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Hello Adam, this is Pip from 
Narrowboat Oliana. 

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My Christmases tend to start far
earlier than most people's. 

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I'm a theatre designer and over 
the last few years I've designed

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the scenery for the pantomime at
the theatre Chipping Norton. 

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My Christmas prep tends to start
early, around late spring, early

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summer. 
It's quite odd being in the 

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depths of panto when there's a 
heat wave going on outside the 

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boat. 
During October, rehearsals 

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happen. 
For the first few years we'd 

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move Oliana down onto the South 
Oxford Canal. 

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I'd head off to do a week's work
in Chipping Norton, painting 

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scenery and sorting props, and 
then on a Saturday evening I'd 

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climb on a bus and head to find 
the boat somewhere between 

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Oxford and Banbury. 
After four weeks of rehearsals, 

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the show opens and excited 
audiences take over the 

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building, laughing, shouting, 
booing and singing along with 

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the actors. 
I just hope that I haven't 

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peaked too soon, as there's 
still another four or five weeks

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to go before the big day. 
And here's hoping that Father 

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Christmas finds us wherever 
we're moored, because we don't 

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always know where we're going to
be moored for Christmas. 

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This is Chris here of the Narrow
Boat Empire. 

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I thought I'd just share a 
memory from about a Christmas 

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memory from about which I 
believe 50 years ago, 1975 

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actually. 
But I was on my boat, my first 

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working boat with a large 
Woolwich boat called Epsom and 

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it was my first Christmas on my 
own that wasn't all together 

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alone as with my doggy Edward 
and a big Dalmatian I had with 

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me for 1415 years. 
Right opposite where I was more 

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at the junction at Bar Bridge, 
there's a pub called the Jolly 

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Tar, gone now, long gone and I 
think it's been replaced by 

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houses when I was more there and
and the evening progressed more 

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and more lively, joking and 
laughing and generally enjoying 

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themselves because it was after 
all Christmas Eve. 

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I must admit to a certain extent
I was a bit fed up, I suppose, 

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because it was the first time on
my own and I suppose all the 

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jollity and the hilarity that 
was going on sort of made me 

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feel a bit more withdrawn. 
It was cold I had before I go 

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in, but my battery was flat so I
had no radio or TVI. 

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Retired early, got into my bunk 
and the next morning it was a 

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very crisp, lovely sunny sky, 
bit of ice on the canal and the 

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dusting of snow. 
Very soon there was a succession

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of people walking dogs and 
pushing prams and shouting Merry

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Christmas and how are you and 
all. 

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That's the sort of stuff. 
And you know, my spirits were 

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lifted. 
I was where I wanted to be, I 

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was on a boat on the canal, as 
close as you can get to nature 

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and I couldn't have wished for a
better Christmas present. 

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Hey there, it's MB Hogarth. 
We used to be continuous 

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cruisers and have spent many a 
Christmas aboard, starting all 

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the way back in 2008. 
That first year we were iced in 

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at Foxton and now we're gearing 
up to relive the experience, 

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minus the ice. 
Hopefully this year we're 

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teaming up once again with a 
crew of MB Caxton for another 

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festive cruise. 
Last Christmas we met at Norton 

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Junction on the Grand Union and 
headed, fingers very much 

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crossed, to Stoke Bruen hoping 
to snag a mooring. 

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The boating God smiled on us and
we managed to bag the perfect 

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spot for both Hogarth and Caxton
right opposite. 

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The boat in Christmas Eve was 
spent exactly as it should be, a

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cosy pub visit for a couple of 
pints and some glorious cheesy 

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chips, followed by an afternoon 
of enthusiastic veg prep. 

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Back on board that evening we 
wandered up to Stoke Brewing 

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Church for lovely Carol service,
which set the tone perfectly for

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the big day. 
Christmas Day itself was a 

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00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,720
beautifully choreographed 
operation. 

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The Turkey, roast potatoes and 
parmesan parsnips were expertly 

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cooked on MB Catson before being
ceremonially marched down the 

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towpath and delivered through 
Hogarth's side hatch, much to 

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the amusement of passing boaters
and dog walkers. 

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Once everything was assembled, 
we all tucked into a fantastic 

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00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:16,360
Christmas lunch together. 
The afternoon was reserved for 

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00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:19,800
the new Wallace and Gromit 
Vengeance Most Foul, complete 

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with its high speed narrow boat 
chase followed by card games as 

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the light faded. 
It was MB Caxton's first 

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00:14:27,000 --> 00:14:29,960
Christmas aboard and the fact 
that Eager to do it again this 

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00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:32,600
year tells you everything you 
need to know. 

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00:14:32,600 --> 00:14:37,280
Hi, Adam, it's Mick from Oliana.
We spent a winter on our first 

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boat, Liliana on the 
Macclesfield Canal and Peak 

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00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:44,480
Forest Canal. 
During the week before Christmas

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00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:49,800
we went to a the wedding of my 
niece in Rochdale and after that

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00:14:49,800 --> 00:14:53,520
wedding lots of family had 
rented a holiday cottage nearby 

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00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:57,240
to Bugsworth Basin. 
On Christmas Day. 

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00:14:57,520 --> 00:15:03,880
It was Pip's 50th birthday so 
her family rented a another 

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00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:07,320
holiday cottage in Buxworth 
itself. 

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00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:09,320
We had a lovely few days with 
them. 

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00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:12,360
We had Christmas dinner at in 
their holiday accommodation. 

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00:15:13,120 --> 00:15:17,640
We had plans to leave Bugsworth 
Basin a few days after Christmas

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00:15:17,640 --> 00:15:22,160
'cause our time there was up. 
As we were preparing to leave, a

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00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:26,720
friend of ours on marabout 
Bleasdale turned up. 

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00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:31,960
We'd first met Heather on 
Bleasdale at Little Venice in 

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00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:34,200
London. 
We didn't know her cruising 

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00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:37,400
plans and then there she was and
she said oh, you must stay, you 

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00:15:37,400 --> 00:15:40,280
must stay. 
We're having a New Year's Eve 

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00:15:40,280 --> 00:15:45,960
party on board the old historic 
boat Narrowboat Tench, which was

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00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:49,600
owned by her friend. 
So we stayed there for New Year 

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00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:51,160
as well. 
We had a lovely New Year's Eve 

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00:15:51,160 --> 00:16:02,840
in the hold of Tench. 
But that's all for this 

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00:16:02,840 --> 00:16:06,520
Christmas edition of the Water 
Rd with special thanks to the 

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00:16:06,520 --> 00:16:10,680
staff and volunteers here at the
National Waterways Museum at 

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00:16:10,680 --> 00:16:13,400
Ellesmere Port. 
The podcast is produced and 

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00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:16,880
presented by me, Adam Porter. 
Don't forget that all previous 

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00:16:16,880 --> 00:16:19,400
episodes are always available to
listen to. 

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00:16:19,920 --> 00:16:22,480
We'll be back with Series 2 in 
the spring. 

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Thank you for listening to The 
Water Road and Merry Christmas.

