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Have you ever laid in bed 
replaying the same conversation 

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or same situation over and over 
and over in your head because 

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you feel like it just should 
have gone differently? 

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Because you feel like you made a
small mistake? 

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And you just sit there thinking 
about it over and over, running 

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through different scenarios, 
running through how the next 

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conversation may go and you find
yourself sleepless. 

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You find yourself driving 
yourself crazy with your own 

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thinking. 
If that sounds familiar, I'm 

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right there with you. 
I've spent years dealing with 

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that exact same feeling, that 
exact same situation, and I've 

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been trying to figure out how do
we stop overthinking? 

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My name is Ethan Jewell and 
welcome back to Feel Your 

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Feelings. 
Now, before anything else, I 

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want to remind you on this 
podcast, I'm not a doctor, I'm 

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not a psychiatrist, I'm not a 
professional in the mental 

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health industry whatsoever. 
And today I'm not going to 

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preach the science of it all at 
you. 

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I'm not going to come at you 
from a clinical perspective. 

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Instead, I'm going to talk to 
you as somebody who understands 

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what you're going through, as 
somebody who's been through it. 

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I've been struggling with my 
mental health for the better 

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part of six years, and I have 
tried and tried and failed many 

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different ways to get better. 
And I'm finally more on the 

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healing side and I want to start
the conversation about mental 

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health. 
So thank you so much for being 

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here. 
Today we're going to talk about 

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the topic of overthinking. 
This is an incredibly widespread

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problem and I don't think a lot 
of people think of it as that 

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much of a problem. 
I think a lot of people actually

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identify themselves within 
overthinking. 

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They identify themselves like I 
am an overthinker, I am an 

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anxious person, and there is a 
level of identity or comfort 

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that comes within finding 
something like overthinking that

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you struggle with and 
identifying yourself within 

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that. 
But The thing is, overthinking 

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is not just something to 
identify with. 

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In fact, it's dangerous and it 
messes with your mental health 

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more than you may know. 
It messes with your sleep, it 

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messes with your ability to 
function day-to-day, and it 

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could be eating away at you 
without you even realizing. 

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So today we're going to talk 
about what overthinking really 

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is and why we do it. 
Then we're going to talk about 

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the harms of overthinking. 
And then finally, we're going to

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go through a list of like 7 
solutions that I put together 

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for you to try. 
Now, these are not guaranteed by

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the book, easy to do solutions. 
I'm not telling you that you're 

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going to watch this episode and 
be able to 100% cure your 

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overthinking, but instead I want
to give you the tools to be able

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to move forward and figure out 
on your own what works for you. 

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Because ultimately, the journey 
of healing is about learning. 

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It's about finding yourself. 
It's about learning what works 

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for you. 
So the first step of learning 

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what works for you is 
information. 

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To start, overthinking is more 
than just thinking too much. 

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In psychology, it's called 
rumination. 

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It's when your mind keeps 
looping through thoughts about 

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the past or the future without 
reaching a solution, grounding, 

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or action. 
When we overthink, we analyze 

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every single detail, we think 
about every single outcome. 

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Usually these thoughts trend 
negative and we just start 

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focusing on what could go wrong,
what is wrong with us, what 

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we're doing wrong, and it 
becomes torturous. 

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It doesn't help it, it hurts. 
Many people think that they're 

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just preparing for the future, 
or maybe they're thinking 

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through the past, but really 
ruminating it does more damage 

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than good. 
Research shows that it can 

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reduce decision making ability 
because you're stuck in analysis

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instead of action. 
It can increase anxiety and 

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emotional distress. 
It disrupts sleep because 

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obviously if you're of thinking,
you're not sleeping. 

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It also uses mental energy 
without solving anything. 

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It feels productive because you 
know you're thinking through 

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things, you're thinking about 
the future, you're thinking 

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about the past. 
But realistically, it doesn't 

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lead to clarity, it just drains 
you. 

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This isn't just a personality 
type, it's a cycle that keeps us

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trapped in fear of outcomes or 
in the pain of the past instead 

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of moving towards solutions. 
So if it's so painful, why do we

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do it? 
Let's look at actual 

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psychological reasons of why we 
overthink the first one. 

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Fear. 
OK, Fear of mistakes or 

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uncertainty. 
We overthink because we're 

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afraid of getting it wrong. 
When the outcome is important or

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it feels important, the brain 
tries to kind of cover all the 

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angles. 
It tries to think of all the 

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possible outcomes. 
It feels like a productive way 

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of preparing, but there's no 
finish line in these thought 

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loops, only more worry. 
Another reason is maybe if you 

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struggle with perfectionism, if 
perfect is the end goal, nothing

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is ever good enough. 
And that leads us to think and 

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think and analyze and try to 
prepare for this unrealistic 

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outcome of perfection. 
Next, it might be trying to 

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regain control. 
When life feels unpredictable, 

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our mind ruminates to feel like 
we do have control, but it's 

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just an illusion. 
We may be feeling like we don't 

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have control, and that's OK. 
You're allowed to not have 

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control of every aspect of your 
life. 

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But our brain doesn't like that.
It wants to be prepared, so it 

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tries, it's very best to take 
control by thinking way too 

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much. 
And although that feels like 

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control, instead it's just 
worry. 

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Overthinking it doesn't make you
smarter. 

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It doesn't prepare you. 
It keeps you stuck. 

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It keeps you stuck in the same 
loop over and over and over 

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again. 
And the danger with that loop is

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when we get stuck thinking of 
the what ifs, all of the 

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negative outcomes. 
It can become a self fulfilling 

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prophecy. 
If you are thinking about 

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healing your mental health, but 
you're worried about, oh but 

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what if I'm not good enough? 
What if I don't actually heal? 

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And you find yourself 
overthinking all of this instead

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of taking action. 
The actions that you do take 

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will be influenced by the 
negative thoughts that you have 

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been repeating in your head over
and over again. 

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So now let's get to the part 
that all of us are here for. 

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How do we actually stop 
overthinking? 

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I want to remind you, none of 
these are guaranteed. 

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You should try all of them in 
your own life. 

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And if one works, stick to it. 
That is how healing progress is 

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made. 
So first, it sounds silly and 

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cliche, but the first one is 
mindfulness and presence. 

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These are two buzzwords that we 
hear often in the mental health 

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community that you need to be 
mindful of your feelings, that 

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you need to be mindful of what 
you're thinking. 

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And it sounds a little quite 
ridiculous, but it isn't just a 

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buzzword. 
Many studies show that 

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mindfulness breaks rumination by
bringing attention back to the 

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present moment. 
And this is something that I 

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personally learned in therapy. 
My therapist taught me how to 

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sit with feelings or thoughts 
and bring attention to them. 

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And by doing so, it can get rid 
of these thought patterns and 

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loops that we become stuck in. 
So here's how to do it. 

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You sit quietly for three to 5 
minutes in a quiet room. 

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You could put headphones on, 
noise cancelling, but no noise. 

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Just sit and quiet and focus on 
your breath. 

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And when your thoughts distract,
you gently bring your focus back

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to your breath. 
Just think in and out and focus 

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on that breathing. 
It's not about stopping the 

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thoughts, it's about not getting
lost in them. 

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So when a thought comes up, when
we begin overthinking and we 

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start thinking about something 
that has happened or something 

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that could happen, you just 
bring your focus gently back to 

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your breath. 
This teaches your brain that 

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yes, those thoughts can exist, 
but we don't need to ruminate on

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them. 
We don't need to sit there over 

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and over thinking. 
And the amazing thing about this

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is you can do it almost 
anywhere. 

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The moment you find yourself 
over thinking, you can have that

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awareness given by that 
knowledge of those thought 

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loops, and you can stop yourself
and you can sit down and bring 

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your attention back to your 
breath instead of getting caught

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up in those thought loops. 
Next, you can set a dedicated 

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worry time. 
I know this sounds a little bit 

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silly, but instead of letting 
worry flood your whole day, you 

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can schedule a specific time for
it. 

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Research shows that 
compartmentalizing worry trains 

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your brain that it has a 
designated space to think, so it

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stops invading all of your time.
It's difficult to stop 

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overthinking in its tracks, but 
it's much more manageable to 

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allow yourself to overthink in 
smaller chunks. 

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So instead of overthinking 
throughout your entire day, 

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maybe you set a 10 minute timer 
and you think through all of 

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your concerns and your worries 
and your ruminations during that

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window, and then when the time's
up, you tell yourself that's it,

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and you move on. 
This may take some time to train

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your brain to actually have an 
off switch, but once you do, it 

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becomes a very powerful way to 
hold your overthinking within 

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one smaller window instead of 
your entire day. 

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Another powerful tool you can 
use is you can challenge your 

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thoughts. 
Overthinking often creates 

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unrealistic or exaggerated 
thoughts, but cognitive 

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techniques can help you question
them. 

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So instead of just accepting all
of these thoughts, instead of 

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just accepting the rumination 
and letting yourself get worried

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and anxious and not be able to 
sleep because of it, you can ask

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yourself, is this thought fact, 
or fear? 

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Am I catastrophizing? 
What evidence supports this 

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thought? 
By doing this, you directly 

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challenge your overthinking, and
instead of letting it just 

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completely run wild, you can 
potentially stop it in its 

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tracks and really be able to 
narrow in on where that thought 

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is coming from. 
Instead of just accepting that 

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thought as truth, you can figure
out whether it's just coming 

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from a place of fear, if it's 
coming from a place of worry, if

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it's coming from an anxiety. 
And by doing that, you take away

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the power of overthinking, you 
take away the power of those 

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thoughts just running wild 
through your brain, and you take

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back control to yourself. 
Another method is to journal. 

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I will always recommend 
journaling. 

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I think it is incredibly 
powerful and incredibly 

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underrated. 
Writing down your thoughts can 

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help your brain externalize and 
organize them instead of just 

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tucking them down. 
Research shows that writing 

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worries helps reduce stress and 
mental clutter, so you can set a

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short timer and just write 
everything on your mind without 

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judgement. 
You know, don't reread it 

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immediately. 
Just write it down and release 

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it. 
This is very similar to the 

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cognitive benefits of therapy. 
You are getting out your 

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thoughts. 
You are getting out your 

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feelings, and then you are 
letting them go. 

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You are letting them exist. 
There is so much power in being 

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able to let go of your thoughts 
and let go of your feelings 

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instead of holding on to them 
and thinking through them and 

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ruminating on them over and over
and over again. 

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You don't need to overpower your
feelings, you don't need to 

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fight them, you don't need to 
overpower these thoughts and 

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push them out of your life 
completely. 

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You just need to learn to rein 
them in a little bit. 

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And journaling is an incredibly 
powerful way to accept those 

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thoughts and the fact that 
you're having them and be able 

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to put them onto something 
tangible like paper and then let

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them go. 
Finally, you should practice 

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self compassion. 
And I know this sounds 

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incredibly cliche, but people 
who overthink often judge 

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themselves harshly. 
Research shows that self 

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compassion reduces rumination 
and improves emotional 

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resilience. 
So talk to yourself like you 

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would a friend. 
Understand that it's OK to feel 

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this way and you are doing the 
best you can with what you know 

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right now. 
That compassion can break up 

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this cycle because often 
overthinking comes with guilt. 

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You start thinking about a 
situation in the past and how 

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you could have done things 
differently, and you feel guilty

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that you didn't handle it 
correctly. 

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Or you start thinking about 
something in the future and you 

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start doubting yourself. 
If you practice self compassion,

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it breaks down that guilt and it
breaks down that doubt. 

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It breaks down the shame that 
you have related to your 

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feelings, and it allows you to 
handle your overthinking from a 

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much more neutral position, 
which is a powerful position to 

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give yourself. 
It gives you an upper edge, it 

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gives you an advantage. 
Instead of being lost within 

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your overthinking, you can 
become a little bit more neutral

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and come at it from a realistic 
standpoint. 

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This compassion, this softness 
to yourself can completely break

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up the cycle. 
Overthinking isn't a flaw. 

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It's often your brain trying to 
protect you from uncertainty, 

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mistakes, or fear. 
But it's also not an identity. 

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Thinking endlessly doesn't solve
problems, it just kind of 

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repackages them. 
And what stops that loop isn't 

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shutting your mind off, it's 
redirecting your mind with 

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intention. 
So I strongly suggest that you 

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try one of the methods that I 
recommended today, or maybe do a

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little more research and try 
something entirely different. 

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But what matters is you take 
action against your 

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overthinking. 
So try journaling, try self 

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compassion, try to release those
feelings and release those 

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thoughts instead of pulling them
closer and looping them over and

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over and over again. 
What matters is you try healing.

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Your mental health is never 
going to be a perfect linear 

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journey. 
You will fall back and slip up 

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many times over and over again. 
But what matters is you keep 

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trying because you are capable. 
You are capable of healing and 

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you are capable of controlling 
your overthinking. 

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This overthinking doesn't define
you, it's just a pattern, and 

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patterns can be changed with 
practice, grace, and awareness. 

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You're not alone in this, and 
you can train your mind to stop 

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torturing you with overthinking 
and live your life with more 

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clarity. 
That's going to wrap it up for 

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today's episode. 
If you need help feeling your 

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feelings, you should check out 
my music on all platforms under 

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the name of Ethan Jewel. 
I almost guarantee it'll make 

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you cry. 
Also, if you enjoy this podcast,

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a great way to support me is to 
get merch. 

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00:13:59,080 --> 00:14:01,800
I just dropped a merch line. 
This hoodie is one of them. 

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You can find it at 
ethanjewel.myshopify.com or at 

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00:14:05,800 --> 00:14:08,880
the link in the description. 
So thank you so much for being 

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here. 
Thank you for understanding that

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you're overthinking does not 
define you. 

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And as always, thank you for 
feeling your feelings. 

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I'll see you next time.