Yeah, you got this. You look great, right?
You sound even better. Thank you.
OK. Hey, everybody, and welcome back
to Part 2 of episode three of Ball Boys.
You know, we had so many things packed into episode three that
we decided, hey, we just got to cut it up and we're going to
give the people what they want. But.
Then so many things happened in Monte Carlo that just ended
today that we said, hey, we got to start there.
So as always, I'm Paul Moncalm, one of your cohost.
I'm here with Billy Hansen. Hey, Billy.
Hey, Paul. Yeah, Wow.
Monte Carlo, right? The boys acting like little
boys. They were like, hey, we are
going to throw a tantrum by the ocean.
Yeah, was that great, like Tantrum by the ocean because
there was, there was a lot of that going on.
So let's get into it. Let's just talk about the the
results. So the winner circle.
Thank the Lord. Rublev finally won a Masters
1000 tournament. He has been in three or four
finals before that. He just keeps coming up short.
Rublev, he's a great player, but he's got so much competition and
now he finally won. My mom is thrilled Rublev is one
of her favorite players. She thinks he's really hot.
She thinks Rublev and Fritz are the two hottest guys on tour.
I I I disagree with her. Like she's hottest and tall.
Guy like great hair. I mean, great hair is definitely
worth putting in air quotes for for at least Fritz I I do love
Rublev's hair. I mean it is.
It is always giving angles and finding its light.
Wait, does she think that they're the hottest players
physically or just like in terms of their game?
Their whole persona, their whole aura.
Just the whole package, Paul. So she's like, oh, I want to
date Andre Rublev and or Fritz. Yeah, and or there's an appeal
to him. He's actually turning out to be
one of the sweeter guys on the tour, which given the the nature
of Monte Carlo and what just happened with all of the drama.
Is is kind of refreshing that there's a gentleman coming out
you know so he just won in three sets over Holgaruna who we have
a lot to talk about and and. You thought Rublev's.
Did you think his speech was charming, Paul?
I did. It was super heartwarming.
So he he had this great little speech moment where he confused
the tournament director. And the Princess of Monaco, and
they do not look like sisters. Y'all they do not.
And it was pretty clear who had the $400.00 haircut and who was
the term of director and he had them confused and he's like,
sorry, I'm so stupid, which is very cute.
But then he also, you know he had that moment with the the
crowd just saying you know, big things.
Being from the country that I'm from to have international
support means a lot. He was it was really a heartfelt
moment and. All things said, I mean, look,
I've, I've really come out again.
I know it's controversial, but I'm very against this war that's
going on and I really think that there needs to be more
culpability. The fact that he even said that.
I mean, who knows if Russia is going to throw his family in the
gulag after saying that, even being from a country like he's
from. But it was just great that he
acknowledged it at least, right? Yeah, I mean it's it's
disheartening that that saying that simply being from the
country where I'm from, I really appreciate all the international
support I mean. It's disheartening that that's
so much more than any other Russian or Belarusian player has
really said. But good on Andre and good for
him winning a Masters 1000. Did you like Runa's?
He had tantrums galore. Look, he's still very young, and
sometimes when you're very young you get crabby.
Especially when you're tired and you are jet lag.
Maybe you didn't like get your your bottle, your nappy, but he
he beat himself and you know, which is sometimes fun to watch
That five all game in the 3rd and he misses 2 overheads into
the net. At first I was like wait, is
there a glitch? Or did the exact same thing
happen over again? And it did.
It was the exact same thing. He just hit 2 overheads into the
net and so he starts. He starts hitting smashing
tennis balls into the crowd. He does it once and he starts
getting booed and so his answer is to do a second time.
He got a code violation, but. That technically, I think should
have been a couple code violations.
Who knows? He could have been in trouble.
But I think the UMP was smart to not turn it into a bigger deal
than it than it was. And in in Runa's defense, he had
played Sinner in another three set thriller, you know, late
into the night. Yeah, the night before.
So I think he had a bit of a physical wall.
He is only 19. So, but I I I don't know if it's
a physical wall or a mental wall but he's just kind of turning
out to be a real baby and people are talking about it.
It's like there's people are not loving Rune.
Because after he smashed those two balls into the into the
crowd like he was getting booed and he was just like he started
doing like come on give me more and like egging.
He was like egging the the crowd on, which I think we know by now
is never a good idea. Like it's never good idea to
take on the entire stadium. You know, he seems though, to
thrive on it because he did it against Sinner the night before
and it sort of kept him in the match.
It sort of. Invigorated him.
So perhaps he thought that the same thing could happen today.
I don't know. He's he's a brat.
But in my opinion, yeah, he's just a brat.
It's not, it hasn't gotten to the point of him being, like,
really problematic yet. Like, he's in my opinion,
nothing. His encore behavior is nothing
compared to Curious or McEnroe back in the day.
I mean, we're not even close to that level.
Totally. But I do feel like there's like
the new big three and the old big three and the new big three
are are really kind of starting to like take shape in the
shadows of the other big three. So you know the the new big
three is Alcaraz, Rune and Sinner.
The old ones obviously are Rafa Joker and fed.
So obviously Alcaraz is Rafael Ondell.
Not just because they're both Spanish look do not write in and
it's more reasons that they have very similar games, power plays,
tons of tons of top spin. And when they clap, they neither
one can close their hands completely, because they hold
the racket with such a grip that their fingers are just unable to
to extend. And then we've got Rene, who's
turning into Joker. Yes, but again the the
difference is that Joker was somewhat likeable at the
beginning. Rene's coming in.
Bratty, hot and bratty and and unlikable from the jump.
So he he has an opportunity to become more likable, whereas
Novak, I don't know if he has an opportunity to become at this
point less likable. True.
It's like you know how do you know when you've hit rock bottom
and or is there a basement underneath that rock bottom and.
Exactly. We'll find out.
But it is interesting. Like, yeah, Runa has decided to,
like, skip the likability phase. He's just like, no, no, no, no,
no. I'm just going to go to where
you all hate me. And that is like and it's just
it's weird because he didn't have to go there.
The Danish fan seemed to like him.
Well, his mother does. She likes him, Mother.
Likes him and I. I'm going to say it, Paul.
He's he could, I could turn around.
He hasn't done anything yet to make me dislike him for
eternity. I'm still open.
I like his game. I like his looks.
One of the commentators was marveling at his legs last night
against Sinner and was like. That was me.
He's got legs carved of oak. That's.
I'm like, OK, OK. All right.
Wow. Yeah, that that commentary booth
needed to be cleaned up after that.
Yeah, was that guy OKI mean. Worked up about these legs
carved of a hook. Rune is going to avoid him at
the. Are you saying then that Sinner
is Federer? Because that's a little bit of
a. That's that's a bit of a reach.
But Sinner, so, OK, look, Sinner.
The last three masters, one thousands.
He's made semis or better. I I thought he was going to.
I actually thought he was going to win this one.
But it's fine. He didn't.
It's fine. But he's he's got a real
elegance to his game and sort of same body type as Federer.
He's very lithe. He's very light in the loafers
and he's, he's got it. I love to watch his game.
It's very beautiful to watch. Yes, I I appreciate you you
comparing the. Old big three to the new big
three. I think it's most interesting to
about the new big three is that they're all different, right?
Alcaraz is kind of like this Golden Boy, right?
Can do no wrong kind of like Aaron Samuels and Mean Girls or
something. And and Runa is this brat, this
bad boy kind of like I know my references are all very data but
kind of like you know Maverick and Top Gun or something, right.
And then Sinner. He's like this Goody 2 shoes,
right? He follows all the rules, kind
of like a Tracy Flick an election.
And then he gets really pissed off when other people don't
follow the rules. And you can tell that he's
steaming, but he's trying to keep it in.
And I just like that contrast among the three of them.
I love those 3 references. I agree with.
I agree with all that I don't know.
I'm I'm yes and I would love to watch Tracy Flick play Maverick
in beach volleyball. But yes, absolutely shirtless.
That's the only way to play. So part of why we had to talk
was that there were just a lot of outbursts going on, and I was
worried that our whole cute little segment of outfits and
outbursts was going to be kind of like shortlived.
But no, like you said the boys were acting like.
Little brats. And there was a lot going on.
So we were talking a little bit about, like, Sinner and Runa.
Their semifinal match was super contentious.
Like their handshake at the end, like, that was a drive by from
Sinner. He was like, no, do not touch
me, you fucking Brat. Because Runa, at one point he
like Sinner hit a ball out and Runa hit it back.
You know, this happens every now and then, but it went directly
for Sinner's head and Sinner was just like, what?
Yeah. And like Rene was like, Oh no, I
did not do them. And it's like, no.
I I think that that was intentional from Bruno, but I'm
not 100% sure. Also, this is part of Sinner's
growth process. You have to learn how to deal
with brats. They're a dime a dozen.
And Runa's not only a brat, he's a brat with talent.
So he's going to do everything he can to get under your skin.
And I I really respect Sinner, but you know, I think he can
only grow. From this experience.
But just the whole way that Rene was like, again, egging the
crowd on and like, like going like, oh louder, oh louder,
yeah, tell me more oh. Paul, I'm sticking with Runa.
You're you're sticking with Rune.
Yeah, Rene Stubbs is the full name.
That Renee Richards OK, yes. Yes, but that wasn't all Hot
couple Alert, Medvedev and Zverev have fully broken up at
this point it is. They are having a social media
war. It is like.
What's Justin Bieber's wife name again?
Haley Haley Baldwin or Hillary Bald Bieber.
Haley Bieber? Yeah, yeah, I don't know.
It's that versus Selena Gomez. They are fighting on social
media now because they had a quarterfinal and it was another
tough, tough match and Medvedev again pulled it out and got the
best of Zverev. Zverev is still on his his
comeback tour from his his French Open injury last year.
But now, like, so afterwards, I was like scrolling through
Instagram and just seeing all these quotes and it was like
Vera was talking about after the loss, saying that Medvedev is
one of the most unfair players in the world and that he takes
fair play and sportmanship very serious and Medvedev does not.
And that whenever he's playing well, he finds a way to like
take a bathroom break or something.
Medvedev was just like, no, sorry.
I'm sorry, I'm with Medvedev. I'm like, no, sorry, Medvedev.
I'm not saying he's perfect, but I don't think.
Egregious sportsmanship. Faux pas are his MO at all, and
he took a break in the third set during the allotted change over
time. He didn't take a bunch of extra
time and the match was still very competitive after that.
It wasn't like that was an immediate momentum shift.
You know what my feeling is? I think this is a PR ploy from
Zaverev to get him into the conversation again.
He also made some comment that he thinks he would have beaten
the doll at the French Open last year if he hadn't twisted his
ankle, which is a pretty bold comment.
He's been making pretty controversial comments and I
think he's trying to be in the conversation again because guess
what? No one's been talking about him
because he hasn't been playing well.
I for some reason I thought that they were really good friends,
maybe because they're like the same height.
And kind of relatively same age, yeah, so.
I thought they were buddies, but I I don't know, I I'm excited to
watch. Some spicy drama between those
two. OK.
But the last, the last bit of drama, So big highlight for me
is whenever somebody beats Djokovic because as we've
discussed and so, you know, former former hot heartthrob
Mussetti, Lorenzo Mussetti, it's funny, you know what?
It is because he's growing his hair out and honestly, guys.
Stop growing your hair out, Billy.
I know you're you're trying to put your, your.
Little, I'm cleaning for you because I'm growing my hair out.
Yeah, and honestly, once you do, you're off the pod or we're
going to Suppo. No more video, no more video
recording for the pod. But Musetti beat Djokovic in
like the round of 16, and it wasn't the greatest match.
Like, let's be honest. Djokovic is rusty because he's
not allowed in in a lot of countries right now.
Rightfully so, and but Djokovic also no stranger to the outburst
at one point during the changeover, because he didn't
play very well. He just, he sees a racket
hanging, like leaning against his bench, and he just stopped.
He just murders it, He stomps on it, breaks it into, and
everyone's just like, what? Like dude, after all of the?
Incidents that have kind of really blown up.
For for Novak and other players, the fact that players like Runa
are still lobbing balls into the crowd and Novak is still
smashing rackets, it's like, really you haven't learned
anything. But I don't know.
I remember how we were talking about how tough it was to watch
Serena chase that 24th Slam, how she was chasing it for.
Four or five years and kept getting close and they kept
talking about Margaret Courts record and you know, it just, it
was kind of heartbreaking watching Serena chase it.
I'm hoping the doll wins the French so he gets to 23 and then
Novak becomes obsessed with getting to 23.
But he can't do it and we have to watch him chase 23 for like 4
years. But it's instead of being
heartbreaking, it's going to be heartwarming because every time
he loses, it's like, yes, he still doesn't have 23 and he
ends with 22 and it's like I'm here for the Djokovic demise
era. The I.
Was worried you were going to say we have to watch him like as
if it's going to be hard. Like, yes, I could watch him
lose a Grand Slam. Yes, like every week.
I hope that there's enough. Really tough losses to kind of
fill the coffer so that, you know, down the road you can go
back and like let's watch Djokovic lose the French Open
again and it'll just a pure delight.
So that was our quick Monte Carlo recap.
And now we're going to go talk about that gay guy.
All right, welcome back in our next segment is Kwatch.
So that's. You might want to say Q watch.
You might want to say watch like the the German nonsense.
Or maybe it's just the lazy way of saying crotch.
But watch is when we talk about the people in the sport of
tennis who are out, people who have blazed, blazed a trail, no
matter how bright that trail is. And we wanted to start off with
a pretty significant out male player.
Who maybe hasn't gotten a lot of the credit or a lot of the
attention that you would expect from someone who was once the
14th greatest player on the planet?
Billy, who are we talking about? We're talking about Jan Michael
Gamble and you know, he might be 6 three.
He might, he might be arguably very hot.
Looks like he just walked out of an Abercrombie and Fitch.
Catalog, but the reality is that.
For a Hollister store, but yeah. He's incredibly accomplished.
He reached #14 in the world, won three titles.
Scottsdale, Overlayton, Hewitt. Delray Beach over Marty Fish.
He got to the final of the 2001 Miami Masters.
Your favorite tournament? Miami.
My favorite. Yeah, he reached reached the
quarterfinals of Wimbledon in 2000.
The fourth round of the US Open in 2002.
I I met him that year. He's defeated among other
players. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
No, No. You met him.
Oh, OK. I I was.
Telling me the story. Well, OK, I was.
Is this? Erotic fiction, What is this?
I was at the US Open. This was 2002, so you were in
your mid 30s, yeah. I was with my friend Rita Garg,
who is a real Dynamo, a real firecracker.
She's going to, you know, she's going to pitch that start up, if
you know what I mean. Love you, Rita.
It was one of those late night matches against Moya.
Like 132 in the morning. She pulled me down.
He was signing autographs and she was like Jen, Michael, Jen,
Michael, me, my friend Bill. I went by Bill at the time, not
Billy. He took just a quick glance over
at me. And for a fleeting moment
recognized what he was facing and looked away.
Not only that, Paul, he was one of people's most beautiful in
2000. He absolutely was.
And honestly, I think I might have led the lobbying for that
because I look, I, I, I love the story of kind of having like
that gay glance with him. The Gay glance.
A gay glance. It was like, you know, it was
such a such a nice time back then when it was before grinder.
It was like when like bruising existed.
Like gaydar was a thing. Gaydar was like but.
You just read a Bless her soul just bellowed over those
eight-year olds looking for an autograph.
Jan, Michael, meet my friend Bill.
This is Bill. And like he got it.
He registered. He looked away.
And now, did your gaydar go off in that moment?
In that moment. In that moment.
My gaydar had already been bleeping throughout the night.
My gaydar had already gone on my my gaydar was almost out of
batteries. Now because of the two handed
forehand. Partially because of the strut,
because of the serve, because of the what do you call his
necklaces at? The hookah shelves.
Yeah, I mean, there was just a lot.
That Jen Michael was giving us. So your gaydar was going off so
so you could tell and that's like I miss.
Even Rita's gaydar was going off.
Oh, Jesus Christ, if Rita's gaydar was going off, I mean.
You know that gaydar was. Blaring.
I mean her her gaydar is pretty, pretty dull.
So yeah, if she if she picked up on that.
And she so she she basically flung you in front of a bunch of
eight-year olds and said, hey, sign my friend Billy's chest.
Yeah, and he. He looked at you, and it sounds
like he looked to you with like a dead stare of confusion and
fear, but maybe a little bit of. Lust I I would love to think
that there was some lust in that moment.
I would love to think that there was.
Yeah, well, we all. I mean, I I'm going to imagine
there was for multiple purposes, no, the niche genre of manga
that I'm going to create based on Billy Hansen and.
Jan Michael Gamble's alternate universe where they fall in love
that night and become a not so formidable double s team that
makes it to the third round of a Grand Slam once, but they have
a. Beautiful story.
There might also be a narrative where he and I chatted on
Grinder in LA and, you know, 2018.
But I I don't. I don't.
I don't recall. Well, that's the thing.
You never know. Anyone on Grinder could be a dog
you don't know, could be a Bob, or could or could be Jan
Michael. Or a cat.
Look like that's why it's called
a gamble, because you don't know who you're talking to on
Grinder. Who doesn't love a perfect set
of abs? Me.
Me, I don't. I prefer a little bit more of
like a beefy belly, something I can grab on to.
Something that's, you know, I'm feeling enchiladas.
Extremely called out right now and I think that that's our our
personal business, my IBS and my day after Easter consumption of
Cadbury Eggs is nobody's business except yours and mine.
But yes, but back to Jan Michael People's most beautiful almost
fell in love with my friend Billy Hansen named after Jan
Michael Vincent. Which?
Honestly, why? I mean, granted, there was that
just there was a that brief moment in time in the in the 70s
when everyone was naming their babies after Jan Michael
Vincent. I mean there's just, there's so
many Jan Michaels, like I go to the clinic, the the, the nurse
comes out and like Jan Michael and 10 guys stand up.
Mens Health Foundation on on Santa Monica or Which Clinic?
Oh, no, sorry. It's it's Mensa.
It's yeah. And and they all stand up and
they're like, I knew you were going to say that because Mens
is for people who are telepathic.
OK, so Jan Nichols. So, OK, spoiler we've already
talked about this and we're not outing him.
No. He's openly gay.
He's openly gay, everybody. But he never really came out.
There was no big magazine article.
There's no press conference. It's just.
His Wikipedia page. Well, Paul, you've been tracking
his Wikipedia page, which has changed over the even years,
months, weeks even. Yeah, I mean, look, I So when I
want to go to sleep, I read Wikipedia pages of my tennis
idols from the 70s, eighties, 90s and then today.
I'm like, that's what we call music, but like that's what we
call tennis idols. And it's like I have like my my
hits and my my icons and you know, so yeah, I'll just go down
to rabbit hole and I stumbled upon his Wikipedia page and and
and this was weird, but it actually said he was gay twice.
There was like a personal section like and I always go to
the personal section when I go to Wikipedia page, I know.
Everyone underline. Sometimes you go to underline a
certain fact. Yeah, no, but like you know,
like when you go to Wikipedia page and like, oh, personal, oh,
let's see, are they gay? His personal said he's gay.
But then also in his life and biography, it also said he's
gay. It's like, oh, he's gay.
He's not just gay, he's gay. Gay.
Then it went down to 1 instance. So I was like, OK, they just got
a a better editor where there's like the only thing I say once.
And now it just says that he's in a relationship with his
partner Malik, which is clearly a man's name and it is a man,
but it's a little less out. Than saying he is gay so his
page is changing but he's. Still, I mean he's he's posted
numerous, and by numerous, I mean hundreds of photos and
stories of him and Malik in Hawaii, in California, in all
sorts of exotic locales. Showing off their love, Showing
their love. Yeah, you know what they do in
Hawaii? What they started gay marriage.
You know what they do in California.
They have the Eagle, so it is like they're they're going to
like the the hotspots and it's yes they're living and out loud
out proud lifestyle but you know other than like the coverage on
you know greginhollywood.com. And Kenneth in the two and two
and. Two com which are, you know,
very powerful media sources. Not many people are talking
about this and it is, it's crazy.
He was in the top 15. And he was definitely the crush
of a lot of aspiring tennis players in the 90s who cracked
the Top 40 of the New England B levels.
But he's not getting his due. He's not getting his headlines.
He's not getting his headlines because I I think he hasn't made
the choice to publicly say the words.
I'm gay or I'm by or whatever. He Does he have to say it like
that? Bye.
I'm gay. I'm gay.
I'm by. Is that how you?
Came out everybody. Dad, I'm by gay.
I'm by, and he just started crying, just based on how I said
it. So I'm going to start crying
based on how he said it. And talk about a podcast voice.
I'm by Dad, but you know, we've got Carl in the sea, we've got
Robbie Rogers, we got Michael, Sam, we've got, you know, Brian
the Haley. Props to all of you, but top 15
beating Sampras, Courier, Rio Square and Agassi Hewitt.
I mean, this is an incredible accomplishment and I just wonder
why it's not a big. New like flashy story for those
of us who grew up with him and then those, you know, younger
queers who could look up to him. Yeah, well, it's funny.
It's like, are we post gay? Is it just, does it not matter?
And people like, oh, it's, you know, people do whatever come.
On. Well, no, I no because I'm
baffled by it like these other players that have come out.
I'm I'm so happy for them all. But you know Michael Sam didn't
exactly kill it in the NFL. Robbie Rogers married some some
like film producer and doesn't play soccer anymore.
So OK, if it's not post gay, then what the hell is it?
Why doesn't he want to do it? Well, you know, he is a
commentator, so it could be that he feels, because he commentates
for an international audience, maybe he feels like it would be
a distraction. Right.
He just wants to be taken seriously as a tennis
commentator. He might even I I think he might
work for being sports who's which is owned by a Middle
Eastern entity. He he might just be.
No, but we saw the World Cup. Qatar is very progressive.
He might. Be almost allowed beer to be
sold. A cautious businessman, but
maybe that's it. How is he as a commentator?
He's Is he the next Mary Carrillo?
I would say he's the next Mary Jo for sure.
Wow. OK, wait, I don't.
Are you sure? Because that do not mess with my
Mary Jo. Because she I'm a Mary Jo.
Well, she wants to be involved in the in the Jessica Pukula
Chris Evert conversation. She's like, where am I?
Excuse me, don't you Remember Me?
Like I was in the top ten but wasn't really winning a slam for
a while like I. Wish she came so close.
Times 94 French against graph. Wow.
So, Chris, the three sets. I know, I know, she's charter
for hand into weapon, but what I'm saying is that.
Breaking that third set also. So you think that he's the next
Mary Jo because she is great. I feel like he's more like the
next Caroline Wozniack. You made me like it's he that
good as a commentator. Is he really giving you that,
like, insight with humor? I'm going to say no, definitely.
Oh, because of was is just a comedian.
No, that's what I'm saying. I mean last.
Time she made me laugh was when she played Serena Williams in a
final of the US Open. Because that was hilarious.
I think he's he's a commentator that is forgettable and I mean
that and actually as the compliment like.
He That's only ever meant as a compliment, he.
Calls it like it is. He just he just tells you what's
happening and you kind of forget about it.
And maybe that's how he wants to be, how we want to identify.
Yeah, as. Forgettable because I would like
to be remembered as forgett. I don't want the attention, I
don't want the attention that being like the kind of this out
icon would would. Give me an in a way I respect
that and the way I'm like. I don't know.
Why? Wasn't he on the floats of We
Hope Pride? Why doesn't he?
What? I mean, he could get great
tickets. Mariah Carey is playing LA Pride
in June. He could be.
He could not only get great tickets, he could be on stage
with her. He could be like, come on man,
enjoy it. Call Me Maybe Jan Michael.
Because I think Carly Rey is performing as well.
Carly Rey is playing, we hope Pride so in LA.
There's a difference in LA, there's, we hope, Pride and
there's LA it's. There's Santa Monica Pride.
There's a there's like a Hollywood Pride.
There's wait, this town is way too proud.
And. What's your take?
Fault. Shameless things I've seen in
LA. It shouldn't be so goddamn
proud. No.
No, it should not. But what?
What is your take? Does he owe it to us to come
out? Does he owe it to the youth?
I don't think he his peers. I don't think he owes it to
anybody and I don't think that there's there's any sort of debt
that he needs to pay. But I'm just shocked that in,
you know in 2023 when we haven't had a men's player who has been
out and and a player that had such success.
Even though such. Massive career was.
Cut short by injury, right? Yeah, I mean.
Yeah, but he was. He was people's.
Hottest in 2000. You know.
Top 50? Top 50 Most Beautiful People in
the World. Do you know how many times I've
just missed out on that title? I'll tell you 45.
And he took it for granted. And he took it.
He had that he was he was in the finals of Masters he he was he
was a big fucking deal and and so it's just it's confusing that
he didn't get more attention. And I don't know why it is.
I would be very curious. I want to give him all the
attention. I want to give it to him.
I'm bi curious about it. And so Jen Michael, you know we
are here for you and this is this, this whole segment is just
to celebrate you because I think it's freaking awesome and I
don't know if there's going to be that many other out players
anytime soon, but we are going to keep our eye out on it and
we'll be watching. For you.
So yeah, and for the next. Cue watch.
We we cue watch. Yes, exactly.
We support you. We support you 100%.
And we would love to hear your stories of what it was like
being gay, whether out or not on tour.
Yeah, I mean, I would love to. What was it like in the showers?
What was it like, getting physio?
What was it like? You know, those late nights with
Marcelo Rios? I want to hear it all.
All right. So we're coming towards the end
of the episode of episode three of Ball Boys, and we're going to
finish with the game called Game Set Matchmaker.
I'm so excited. I know this is a new game that
Billy made-up. It is basically we're going to
use our high tech randomizers and we're each going to pull out
so we've each selected. Eight names of living players,
retired or active, but people that we've all heard of, and
we've got eight names, we're going to pick them out, each of
them at the. Same time they must be living
and they must be players, but they don't have to be active.
Exactly, exactly people. I think people will get the get
the gist of that in a second. And what are we going to do with
these? Players and so we're each so
we'll have two names and then the game is we have to agree are
they going to be a dream double s team.
Are they going to be a dream matchup of who's going to win,
You know who's going to play each other or rivalry?
Or are they just a dream couple? Is this are we playing
matchmaker? And this is love is blind And
now we're going to, we're going to set these people up in our
minds and say is that a great match or not?
And the winner of this game is going to get a free dating
profile. One hinge and and that will be
me because I'm going to win. All right.
Do you have your first one? I do.
All right. I've got mine.
So. So.
Mine is, yes, Venus Williams. Venus Williams and I have Casper
Rude. I like that.
I love that. Wait, so.
Who decides who's doing? We have to agree, We have to
feel we have to locate it now, like should.
We I'm just seeing them having sex immediately.
I kind of think so too. Yeah, and athletic sex.
Maybe within an art gallery. Yeah, right.
Leo Pelka is looking on. Jealous.
Stoned. Carrying his pink bag I.
I, I, I, I agree. Like, I think that that's
actually such a like, Casper Rude and Venus Williams.
I mean, at first I was like, Oh my God, what a great double s
team. But no, they are.
Great double s team too. Yeah, but they should.
Hook up. I also think that she could
teach him a little something about asserting himself.
Yeah, like in the talk, she could be like, hey, Casper, like
in the boudoir. Doesn't that a little bit more
like just be a little bit more of a boss?
Yeah, yeah. She's going to charge that net.
Are you ready for the next one? OK, make sure you shuffle them
up. Oh, sorry.
Are you OK? I'm OK, but I I choked on this
one. Jennifer Capriotti.
Oh my God, Who do you have?
I have Elena Dimentieva. Oh, man.
Oh, Paul, you lead us off with this one.
So I mean, I I have to say, I think that they are.
I don't know if they're a dream match up, but I would love to
see them play. But I think Capriotti would
destroy Dimentieva. They must have played their
errors over overlapped. Look it up, look it up.
Because I'm with you. I think I want to see that match
up. I think you know Elena
Dimentieva. I love what she achieved even
with that. I mean, the way she's still
challenged and and persevered is admirable, especially in
retrospect. Retrospect.
Yeah. Have they played, Have they
played? I think they played some epic
matches. Actually, I'm going to say
something. Say it.
I want more focus on women's legends tennis.
So women in their 40s, fifties, 60s, seventies, 80s, nineties
playing exhibitions at the Grand Slam.
So I would love to see a match now.
Right now, Jennifer Capriotti as she is today, versus Elena
Dementieva as she is today. I want to see that I would pay
good money for it. I love that, Yeah.
Yeah okay their well their. So their head to head is 3 to 1
capriotti over dementieva. Okay.
So they were all on hard courts, so maybe we can also choose the
the surface. Okay.
I don't really want to see them play on clay, to be honest.
Yeah, no. And and I agree with.
That they had an epic match at the US Open, I think actually in
2003. 2004. I think that that's a great
point, though, about sort of legends tennis.
I feel like there's a lot of legends tennis for men, but I
don't really. Yeah.
Like, yeah, I would love to see, like, Panchita Martinez play
Gabriel Sabatini. Like, fuck yeah.
Have you seen Sabatini lately? She looks Oh my Gaga.
It is running. Over.
Just, yeah, exactly. It just, I I mean, if that's
what I have to live up to. Bulldoze me.
As a as a standard of female beauty in Argentina, I'm fucked
because she is gorgeous. Like, holy crap.
Killing it? I I would.
I would go see a women's legends tournament in a heartbeat.
Oh God, what do you have? Who do you have?
Oh, bitch. Melanie Udan.
Really. I have one Martin del Potro.
Oh Jesus Christ, God. I just think they need to be
like go on a meditation retreat, like together and like just.
Love it, Melanie Udin. She was the American who made it
to the quarters that one year, Yeah.
Oh my God. Melanie Udin Udin.
There was a there was a different udin right that.
Was no. No.
There was not no. No, she she everyone thought she
was the next big thing. She's on the Today show and all
the stuff she beat Dim and Jave, I believe in the fourth round
or? No, she she beat.
What's her name? Yankovic.
To get to the quarters. We're young anyway.
I think she and Juan Martin del Potro, I I see them as a double
s team. I've seen them as a feel good
double s team, like getting a wild card to the US Open.
They both had such great experiences there.
Like a wild card this year, right?
Because Juan Martinez said he's coming back this year to the US
Open. You really want to know that?
Yes, he's coming back. Yeah.
And I think great mixed double s partner for him would be
Melanie. She did win.
She did win a mixed. Yeah, with Jack Sock.
Yeah, in 2011, Yeah. So, hey.
I see them as as our dream double s team for the 2023 U.S.
Open. I'm in and I would go to that.
All right, what if? What have?
What have we got next? We've got fashion plate, decorum
icon Charm School founder Yelena Ostapenko.
Oh, and we've got Danielle Collins.
So they definitely hate each other.
Fireworks. They would love nothing more
than to crush each other on the court.
But because that happens so often, I'm going to say they
should actually date. I think that would be such a
toxic relationship. I'm seeing a I'm seeing a
fashion show. Oh yeah, Like, I mean that they,
they would be like, you know, partners in life and they would.
And absolutely. You know, I would love to see
Daniel Collins in an Ostapenko original with like ruffled puff
sleeves, the big collar and and and and the the sort of clashing
colors all throughout. Like it would with cutouts and
with weird like 80s motifs. And it would just be like and on
the back would be like cowabunga man, like it would just be so.
Inappropriate and wrong, but so stunning.
And I think that they would be a power couple and I think that
they should live in the Hollywood Hills and they should
probably start some. Production company some.
Sort of production company and have like 2 Shih Tzus.
I see them as a a couple, but like.
They're really competitive with each other.
Like a competitive guy even like walking, oh, you liked her
fashion line. Seem way from my fashion line.
Oh no. Even when they're walking their
dogs through like the Beverly Hills Flats, like they are just
like one's walking a little bit faster and then one.
Yeah, no, it's a it's. And neither of them is is a
lesbian. Oh no.
Which? Everything about it is just
awful, yeah. Okay, this is our last.
Oh my God. Are you sure?
Yeah. Did you get it?
You say it first. Tim Kleisters.
Rafael Nadal. Wow dream.
Dream. I love that charity launch.
Oh my God. I want them to be a couple, but
I also want them to be a double s team.
I want them to. I want them to play each other.
I want them to play I. Think kleisters would take it?
This is her comeback exhibitions against Rafael Nadal.
This is her 4th comeback. Yeah, this is how she's going to
do it is. Yeah, no, Alexandro Alexandrov
were over you. Yeah, no, it's no.
Kleisters Nadal XO. She's going to take on the
reigning French Open champion as it's her way to come back for
the 4th time. COVID derailed her comeback, but
now this is it she's taking on. Honestly though, I think what
they should really do is like splits, offs.
So like he does his splits and like, yeah, and then she does
hers and then like they do like, yeah, and it's like, yeah, do.
You know where they would hold. This.
I feel like she's fine to fly out of my orco.
She's fine. This would be in Split, Croatia.
I mean, come on, you handed that to me?
Splits been looking for an event and this is it.
This split open, it's gonna be sponsored by Schlitz and it's
gonna be like everyone's gonna. What's?
Schlitz Schlitz is the performance enhancing beer.
Wasn't that it was like the I don't know if it's a real beer
or not but like there was. Wasn't there that SNL ad for
like, Schlitz Gay? Schlitz Gay beer or it's an
actual beer. Either way.
I'm there for it and I will later a couple like a quick hit
and giggle afterward after the splits competition.
Oh, I mean, I I think that it could be like, I mean, I just
think it'll be like a dance off where it's going to be like
white chicks when they have the dance battle.
Like there's going to be like Kim is going to bring out all of
her kids. The floor.
She's going to be whopping all over.
And he's going to bring out like his, like he's going to bring
out like Roger and everyone else.
And they're going to be like their boy band doing like Bell
Devo dancing. And then they're going to do a
split off and the winner or actually maybe can like like the
like the winner. I'm trying to think of what they
win. I don't know if like they win
like a country. I think they win a bunch of
money for their charities cuz they're great people I think.
I think no please charity, enough charity, charity.
No, they they win a country or they win a country.
Yeah. Yeah.
OK, that's they or no, they they become the king of split.
And they do. One more bonus.
OK, bonus round.
OK. Ready?
OK. I hope you get who I I hope you
get. Who'd you get?
I got this name Yann Michelle Gambill.
OK we're gonna Nope we're gonna we're.
Gonna No, you can't. Nope.
Next.
We've done it, yeah. Unless.
Unless you want to do more. Oh, there's someone I want you
to get. I got a famous Australian
player. Yes, her name is Margaret Court.
Oh, when I got Nikirios. The Aussie Open it's it's the
place where tolerance goes to get eaten by a dingo.
And I think Margaret caught in Nick Kyrios should definitely
Nick, Nick. Nick Kyrios.
I think that they should mostly follow each other on Twitter and
share hateful memes with each other about freedom and
religion. And and just be like good old
like spinsterish gal pals. I mean, Nick is a he's
problematic, I'm not going to lie, but he is an ally, an L GB
TQIA ally. And I would love for him and
Margaret to play double s together at some sort of charity
event benefiting, you know, the Human Rights Campaign.
I know. Honestly.
I just. Want I'm going to set up a
charity for me and you can go fund that.
Fine, I'm going to go fund that. Go fund me.
OK, well, that. Was just for fun.
No, no, no. Game's over.
Stan. OK, what's my next one?
Just aren't you curious? Aren't I curious?
The next one is Holgaruna. OK, good.
We've. Done.
Oh, that's like. A Stan is it's Holgar.
Oh, firework. We are.
We are in the precinct. And yeah, we Oh my God, Stan and
Holger, we already saw that. And it was fire.
And I want to see the blood babies fight.
Blood, baby, The blood it is. OK, well that is that is it
though we are done with that game.
I clearly won again and I'm really excited to go on Tinder
with my free profile that Billy's going to set up for me
and. That's it guys.
So thanks. It's going to be more successful
than your other dating profiles, I promise.
Well, success is in the eye of the beholder, So this has been
our third episode. Let's take a last look at what's
coming up. And so is the clay court season.
We've been hyping up the Americans this whole freaking
show. Billy, is an American going to
win a clay tournament this year? I don't a significant one.
A clay tournament besides the American Clay Open or whatever.
So Stuttgart, Rome or the French are open?
I don't think so. Maybe even Barcelona or Monte
Carlo. I don't think so.
OK, well, you're right. Oh.
Yeah. Who's going to win?
Google is going to win one of those.
I know. I'm as shocked as you are.
I am not a Pagola stand, but she's going to win one of those.
The French. No.
Who's going to win the French? The French is going to be our
good friend on the Shibor who? Do you?
Think's going to win the French. I've got to think ego.
She's so good on clay. We have to remember how good she
is just because she's lost a couple times this year.
She's good at, she's really good player.
Well, I'm going to remember how naughty she is and that's how
I'm going to sign off. So, all right, well, this is our
show. Thank you everybody for
listening. And find out, TuneIn.
And find out were we right, were we wrong, or somewhere in
between. Who's honestly, who fucking
knows. Thanks again for joining us and
say good night, Billy. Good night, Billy.