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You're listening to. 
She said what with your host 

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Alyssa Harper? 
Hello sexy people. 

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Welcome back to. 
She said what if you have not 

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been here before then I'm so 
happy to have you. 

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Thank you so much for popping in
cutie. 

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You are so welcome. 
Whoever you are, this is an 

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inclusive welcoming space for 
you. 

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So hello. 
Hello, hello. 

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And if you've been here before 
then just want to say, I love 

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you. 
Okay? 

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I value you, you are the best. 
Thank you so much for being 

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here. 
Today, we're going to be talking

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about practicing Ian and 
discipline for me is a word that

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gives me a bit of. 
Like a you, it gives me a bit of

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a neck because it's giving like 
telling me what to do and I 

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don't do well with that. 
But when discipline is used 

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properly, it really is a form of
self love its self care. 

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It's going after the things that
you want in life in, it is like 

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so necessary. 
And I've had a like, huge kind 

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of like Awakening on this topic 
in the last little bit. 

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Also coming from like a 
Conservative Christian back. 

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Around and kind of wanting to 
now fight having being told what

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to do for. 
So long now, kind of reworking, 

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how to use discipline in my 
life, in a way that's like 

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meaningful. 
I just feel like I have a lot to

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say about this topic. 
I'm really excited to talk about

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this because I think we could 
all use a little bit of 

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discipline. 
You know. 

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We can all use a little bit of 
consistent motivation coming 

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from within really knowing Ry 
and finding that balance between

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like this soft girl life era 
vibe. 

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To also like that hustle culture
and where to find the in between

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and what actually, like works. 
So that's what we're going to be

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talking about today. 
It's going to be great. 

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So enjoyed today's episode, 
let's get into it. 

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Click cheeky update on miweek. 
What did I do? 

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It was actually a really chill. 
Relaxed week. 

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I did not do that much. 
I feel like this was a week that

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I was using to get organized. 
I just got this new app. 

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Oh my God. 
I'm obsessed. 

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It's called Structured and it's 
the same people that make the 

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app that I've been using for a 
really long time called week Cal

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or like weekly calendar, I don't
know. 

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And I've literally been mapping 
out my life in this app for like

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years. 
So I recently realized I with 

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social media and creating 
content because I'm like doing a

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podcast and Tick-Tock and 
Instagram and soon video podcast

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and then those are going to go 
on YouTube and then we're gonna 

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be doing some like YouTube 
shorts. 

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It's going to be a whole thing 
like there's a lot going on. 

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And I have like this to do list 
that I keep in my journal app 

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which is another great app 
instead of using the notes app 

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journal, app is the best. 
It's like this little blue thing

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was like a little bookmark. 
If you're looking for it, I can 

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link all these apps below for 
you just just hugs and kisses 

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from me to you, but I literally 
will keep it to do list there. 

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And I will just go up to my 
to-do list every day and I'll go

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okay, what can I get done? 
And the problem with that is 

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that I'll look at it. 
I'll be like, AA message this 

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person. 
Yes, book tattoo of I mean, yes 

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I can do that and then the 
things I actually need to get 

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done, like don't get done LOL. 
So with this structured app, 

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it's so good because you can 
plan like okay every Monday I 

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need to complete this task. 
It's not necessarily something 

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you have to do at a certain time
but it's like every Monday, I'm 

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going to like record this thing 
or work on this thing. 

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Also I want to start writing a 
book LOL. 

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Apparently I think I'm an 
author, I don't know. 

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So I'm going to start writing a 
book as well so I'm like okay 

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every week I want to work a 
little bit on the book you know.

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But if I don't I plan to do it 
set aside time for it. 

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I won't do it. 
And I've been thinking so much 

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this week about discipline like 
about the topic of today's 

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episode because I need it like, 
I need discipline. 

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Otherwise, it's not that I don't
meet deadlines, it's not that, I

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don't do a good job, it's just 
that I suffer, I suffer because 

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I stress out. 
I have anxiety, you know what I 

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mean? 
I'm doing things. 

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Last minute, I'm procrastinating
until it's too late, and it 

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really is just it would get to 
me and it would really freak. 

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Straight me. 
And I've noticed it in little 

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ways recently, so I think having
that extra layer of being able 

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to check off the things that I 
need to do in the day and then 

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saying, okay I've done the task,
I need to do today or the few 

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tasks and being able to like put
my phone down and be like, okay,

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I am done today, you know, I 
don't need to do anything else. 

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I don't need to edit anything. 
I don't need to record anything.

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I don't need to do a little blah
and I just want to point out 

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really quickly that I'm fucking 
obsessed with my job. 

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I am obsessed with doing content
creation. 

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I love all of that. 
The thing that I do and I would 

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not do anything that I don't 
want to do. 

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Like I'm very, very, very 
privileged privileged to be in 

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my situation that I'm in right 
now. 

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Yes, I've worked very hard 
together and worked like three 

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jobs at one time to like, you 
know, build to where I am now, 

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but I literally love it and I'm 
not complaining at all. 

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I'm just trying to be the most 
productive I can possibly be. 

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So I could do more and have more
output and put out more stuff 

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for you guys and create more 
resources. 

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And Just be fucking useful for 
you. 

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That's what I want to do at the 
end of the day, so I'm really 

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excited that I'm kind of getting
more organized, but discipline 

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is something that I feel like 
I've kind of come in and out of 

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in my life. 
And as I said, in the intro, 

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like I grew up Christian, I grew
up disciplined, like I grew up 

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disciplined and it wasn't that 
all my parents were horrible and

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they were super Intense or, you 
know, they would like discipline

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Us by getting us in trouble all 
the time but just growing up in 

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church. 
Ouch. 

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Like there are so many rules. 
There's so many things that 

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you're not meant to do and all 
the way up until the time I was 

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like 20 or like 19, like my 
first after my first year, so 

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being in Australia, Excavating 
for four years. 

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Now, I that whole time had so 
many rules, so many things I 

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like wasn't allowed to do. 
And even when I first moved to 

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Australia and I was a part of a 
Bible College, you know, very 

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Christian extremely Interesting.
I literally was not allowed to 

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drink, I wasn't allowed to 
smoke, I wasn't allowed to have 

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sex before marriage and all 
these things. 

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I could actually get in trouble 
for when it came to like my 

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college. 
I could literally get kicked out

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of my program. 
I could literally get sent out 

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of the country if I drank smoked
had sex whatever. 

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There was some other stuff as 
well. 

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But yeah, like it was horrible 
and so you could imagine why 

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someone like me would be like 
fuck that. 

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Fuck discipline. 
Fuck the rules. 

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I'm going to do whatever I want,
and like I want to be able to 

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just like, give up on this idea 
of like, you know, having to 

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keep myself accountable and all 
this shit because even the word 

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accountability. 
Like, I literally, it's like, I 

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have a trauma response to that 
word, like, in the Christian 

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Circle or like, in those 
circles, the word accountability

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is like, because it's like 
keeping you accountable from 

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like having sex. 
Like, how are you and your 

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boyfriend going to stay 
accountable to God and like, in,

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like keep the door open when 
their own. 

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Or like not the alone in a car 
together like all the crazy shit

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that you would do to like not 
have sex and all that crazy 

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shit. 
Like it was just traumatizing. 

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And so for so long, I was like, 
I don't want to be disciplined. 

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I hate the idea of discipline 
and for a long time, like I 

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think it went from, oh, I'm not 
allowed to do these things to 

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like, okay, I'm not going to 
say, I'm not allowed to do 

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anything, but I'm going to force
myself to do these things. 

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So then it was like, okay I have
to work out three times a week. 

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I have to To drink this amount 
of water. 

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Every single day, I have to eat 
these types of foods. 

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I can only have this many cheat 
days. 

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I also had an eating disorder at
one point and so I loved rules 

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around food. 
Like, made me feel safe, it made

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me feel like I had control and 
rules a lot of the time for 

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people like equal control. 
And so it can be this really 

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interesting complicated 
relationship that we passed 

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personally with discipline. 
And those are just two things 

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from my past, the church and the
eating disorder that affect my 

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relationship with discipline. 
But I'm sure you Your own. 

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So I'd encourage you to think 
about what those things are for 

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you, as we go along through this
episode. 

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But what this episode really is 
all about, is about being 

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disciplined, in the things that 
you really want so that you can 

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get those things and being 
disciplined in the things that 

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you really want. 
So that you can enjoy like a 

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life that is filled with those 
things, like self care and 

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self-love. 
And there's a lot of, you know, 

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Trend talk around like the soft 
life girl like soft life era and

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Lycra. 
Resisting hustle culture and not

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being a part of hustle culture 
and, you know, try to be a 

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billionaire by the time you're 
20 years old and all that shit. 

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Like there's a lot of pushback 
on that and I think that's 

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awesome. 
I love that we're having those 

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conversations but you can also 
push yourself too far that way 

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and I had an experience a few 
weeks ago where I was sitting 

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there in my journal and I wrote 
down almost every day at the end

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of my five-minute Journal. 
It was like, what did you learn 

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today? 
And almost every day I was like,

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I can Listen to my body, you 
know, I can just let myself go 

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with the flow and I was like 
giving myself so much leeway to 

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the point that I was getting 
fuck, all done. 

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And I was having a chill time, 
but I was almost becoming a bit 

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like depressed. 
I was like, leaning into that 

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side and I've had struggles with
mental health. 

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You know, I've been diagnosed 
with anxiety and depression at 

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one point, and I know that, 
although now, the only thing 

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that really affects me on a 
regular basis, anxiety. 

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I'm still proud. 
And to be able to get into that 

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depressed state, if I allow it. 
And so, I need discipline in my 

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life. 
I think we all need discipline 

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in our lives or we wouldn't, 
like brush our teeth every day. 

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You know, I mean, we wouldn't go
and exercise, we wouldn't go 

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outside enough, you know, we 
wouldn't eat foods that made us 

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feel good. 
We wouldn't go to sleep at a 

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decent time. 
We would have all these habits 

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day-to-day that make our mental 
health suffer. 

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And when we actually have the 
power to change those things, 

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why wouldn't we, why wouldn't we
at least try, you know? 

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And so, That's why I want to 
encourage you to do today is to 

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find somewhere in between. 
And I think especially with the 

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whole soft life girl like chat 
around that. 

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I see this a lot on Tick-Tock. 
I think sometimes it come off as

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very, like pessimistic, like we 
live in this capitalist society 

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and all of her be is a cog in 
the machine and like my work 

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doesn't matter. 
So like, fucking, I just want to

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go like live in the forest like 
alone and like not be a part of 

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society. 
But I do think to feel like You 

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have a sense of purpose, you 
want to have something 

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meaningful in your life, like 
something that is helping 

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others, something that is 
outside of yourself because even

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if you're financially supported 
and you're totally fine to just 

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chill out and do whatever you 
want. 

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A lot of the time, it's not 
going to be fulfilling unless 

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you are surrounded by a 
community and Community usually 

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comes with give-and-take. 
And I think that that is really,

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really important in at least, 
that's true for me. 

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And I know that's true for a lot
of people around me as I've been

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having these conversations. 
And some people this week. 

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And yeah. 
So I think today, what I really 

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want to do is focus on tips to 
practicing discipline and talk 

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to you about why? 
I think it's necessary to have 

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discipline what your life will 
look like if you don't have it, 

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and what it will look like and 
how you'll be rewarded. 

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If you do have discipline, I 
think when you do have 

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discipline and you work towards 
having this life that you 

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actually enjoy that, you 
actually love and you can be 

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00:11:28,300 --> 00:11:31,300
proud of something that You've 
actually work towards something 

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00:11:31,300 --> 00:11:34,300
you can look back and go. 
Oh, like at one point I was here

228
00:11:34,300 --> 00:11:36,400
and now I'm here. 
And I'm so fucking proud of 

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myself for getting to here and I
think that's really motivating 

230
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:43,100
and really powerful unlike a 
regular basis and I realized 

231
00:11:43,100 --> 00:11:46,000
that this week because my mom 
was texting me and she was like,

232
00:11:46,100 --> 00:11:47,500
you guys haven't gone away in a 
while. 

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00:11:47,500 --> 00:11:50,400
Huh, like, why haven't you guys 
go on a trip, like, oh, I feel 

234
00:11:50,400 --> 00:11:51,900
like I could go on a trip every 
weekend. 

235
00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:53,800
I'm always trying to get away 
but blah, blah blah. 

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00:11:54,100 --> 00:11:56,400
And I was like, honestly, mom, 
not sound like a douche bag but 

237
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like I like my life like I 
really like my life like Point, 

238
00:12:00,300 --> 00:12:03,500
like, I mentioned earlier, I was
working in three different 

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things I was teaching Pilates. 
This was only, you know, six 

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months ago now Santana, eight 
months ago. 

241
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Actually, I was working in a 
restaurant. 

242
00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:14,300
I was teaching Pilates and I was
doing like, social media and 

243
00:12:14,300 --> 00:12:17,400
doing collaborations and all of 
that, I was like busting my 

244
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:19,600
balls. 
What's that word busting my ass?

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I don't know, working really 
hard. 

246
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:22,000
Okay. 
I was just trying to get my shit

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done and I was there like, 
editing stuff on the bus that 

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00:12:25,700 --> 00:12:27,800
take put me 45 minutes to get to
work. 

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00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:30,900
And I was like, recording if you
scroll Back on my Tick Tock. 

250
00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:32,800
There are literally videos of me
on the bus. 

251
00:12:32,800 --> 00:12:35,700
Doing a voiceover like do you 
know how embarrassed I was doing

252
00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:37,200
that? 
But in my little brain I was 

253
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like it's going to be worth it 
like which is so dumb, don't do 

254
00:12:40,200 --> 00:12:43,900
that, that's so embarrassing. 
But at the time I felt like I 

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00:12:43,900 --> 00:12:46,400
was taking action and that's 
what was meaningful to me at the

256
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time. 
And I think that's a really big 

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00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,800
part of, it is realizing that, 
as you become more and more 

258
00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:54,000
disciplined, in the things that 
you want, you prove to yourself 

259
00:12:54,000 --> 00:12:56,300
that you are worthy of being 
disciplined. 

260
00:12:56,300 --> 00:12:59,600
Like, you are worthy of doing 
things for you are. 

261
00:12:59,800 --> 00:13:02,800
The of like setting things in 
stone and saying, okay, this is 

262
00:13:02,800 --> 00:13:04,100
what I'm going to get done 
today. 

263
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:06,000
This is what I'm going to get 
done this week. 

264
00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:09,000
This is a project that I am 
going to complete by the end of 

265
00:13:09,008 --> 00:13:10,900
the year. 
And when you actually can prove 

266
00:13:10,900 --> 00:13:14,100
to yourself, that you can do 
things like you feel so much 

267
00:13:14,100 --> 00:13:16,300
more encouraged. 
No, you're more likely to say to

268
00:13:16,300 --> 00:13:18,400
yourself. 
Oh, I think I'm going to take on

269
00:13:18,400 --> 00:13:21,300
this really big project or I 
think maybe in a few years I'm 

270
00:13:21,300 --> 00:13:24,200
going to move to this place or I
think by the end of the year, I 

271
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:27,400
want to be able to quit my my 
like nine to five or whatever it

272
00:13:27,400 --> 00:13:29,600
is. 
You're more likely to genuinely 

273
00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:32,300
believe believe that you can do 
those things because you've just

274
00:13:32,300 --> 00:13:35,600
watched yourself do other hard 
things in your life. 

275
00:13:35,600 --> 00:13:38,600
Even if it's small things, you 
prove to yourself that you're 

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00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:40,900
able to do it, and that is so 
powerful. 

277
00:13:41,000 --> 00:13:44,300
And again that comes back to why
we're able to build this 

278
00:13:44,300 --> 00:13:48,100
self-love and even 
self-confidence really by doing 

279
00:13:48,100 --> 00:13:49,700
that. 
I think it's so, so so 

280
00:13:49,900 --> 00:13:53,600
important. 
And yeah I mean as much as going

281
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,800
back to I love my life and I 
love what I'm doing. 

282
00:13:57,100 --> 00:14:01,000
It's not just that oh I love 
Like working on social media 

283
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:06,100
stuff. 24/7 that I would do it 
24/7, like, anyone like any job 

284
00:14:06,100 --> 00:14:09,200
there's going to be things that 
I find like, tiring about it or 

285
00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:11,700
things that I just don't like 
about it in general as a job. 

286
00:14:11,700 --> 00:14:14,400
Like, for example, staring at a 
screen all day is shit for your 

287
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:16,000
brain. 
It's like not good for your 

288
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:18,100
brain. 
So as much as I can, I've worked

289
00:14:18,100 --> 00:14:20,800
in different routines to help my
mental health. 

290
00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:24,000
So, instead of sitting on my 
couch or literally laying on my 

291
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:27,100
couch on my phone for hours, at 
a time editing, I'm like, okay, 

292
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:28,600
now I'm going to go sit at a 
cafe. 

293
00:14:28,600 --> 00:14:29,900
I'm going to sit up. 
Rate. 

294
00:14:29,900 --> 00:14:32,300
If I'm going to like be aware of
my posture and like, make sure 

295
00:14:32,300 --> 00:14:34,600
I'm drinking water and make sure
I'm eating and not getting to 

296
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,400
2:00 in my day and having not 
eaten anything. 

297
00:14:37,500 --> 00:14:40,300
You know, like, I'm getting rid 
of those bad habits or, I mean, 

298
00:14:40,300 --> 00:14:42,600
I've gotten rid of those habits,
thank God, but that was like, 

299
00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:44,700
how I was at one point? 
No wonder. 

300
00:14:44,700 --> 00:14:48,700
I felt like shit, you know? 
So not only do I like the job 

301
00:14:48,700 --> 00:14:51,900
that I currently have because 
I've worked towards it, but I 

302
00:14:51,900 --> 00:14:54,500
have an idea of where I want to 
go forward. 

303
00:14:54,500 --> 00:14:57,900
I'm consistently working towards
it, even if it's just in small, 

304
00:14:57,900 --> 00:15:01,300
small, small ways, like Laying 
out the podcast, episode every 

305
00:15:01,300 --> 00:15:05,400
week, or, you know, answering 
DMS or doing whatever it is. 

306
00:15:05,700 --> 00:15:08,200
I also have this idea of okay. 
Now, I want to do the book and I

307
00:15:08,200 --> 00:15:10,100
want to do this and I want to do
that and I don't need to talk 

308
00:15:10,100 --> 00:15:12,500
about myself all day. 
I'm totally not here to gloat. 

309
00:15:12,500 --> 00:15:16,400
Like I don't think this is like 
the coolest thing in the world. 

310
00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:19,600
I love it because it's what I 
want to do, but whatever you 

311
00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:21,800
want to do, that is going to be 
fulfilling for you. 

312
00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:25,000
I think that's fucking sick. 
Like, if you are genuinely 

313
00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:28,000
passionate about like business 
and like building a small 

314
00:15:28,000 --> 00:15:28,800
business. 
Fuck. 

315
00:15:28,800 --> 00:15:30,800
Yeah. 
If super passionate about like 

316
00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:32,000
nursing. 
Fuck. 

317
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:33,800
Yeah. 
If you're like super super into 

318
00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:36,800
like teaching and like 
facilitating that space to like 

319
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:40,300
bring people in and to help 
people feel safe enough to like 

320
00:15:40,300 --> 00:15:43,800
ask questions and all that. 
Like fuck yeah like I love that 

321
00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:45,800
for you. 
I want you to do what is going 

322
00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:49,400
to be fulfilling and exciting 
for you and do it in a way that 

323
00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:53,800
is fulfilling because any job in
the world you can do it in a way

324
00:15:53,800 --> 00:15:55,700
where you'd like it's grueling 
work. 

325
00:15:55,700 --> 00:15:57,900
I hate it. 
You know I don't want to do it. 

326
00:15:57,900 --> 00:15:59,600
Oh I wish I could just quit my 
job. 

327
00:16:00,000 --> 00:16:01,700
I wish you didn't have to work 
so much. 

328
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:05,900
Anyone can feel that way about 
their job or you can have a job 

329
00:16:06,300 --> 00:16:09,100
where the exact same job, but 
your mindset is a lot better. 

330
00:16:09,300 --> 00:16:14,000
And I really, really feel like 
mindset is so important and all 

331
00:16:14,000 --> 00:16:17,200
of this ties in mindset 
discipline, being aware of what 

332
00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:20,300
you're doing with your free time
that's going to affect your 

333
00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:24,400
general overall happiness. 
So much more I think than the 

334
00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,800
actual job that you are doing 
because like, for me, for 

335
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:30,200
example, I did work in like 
Hospitality for like In years. 

336
00:16:30,400 --> 00:16:33,100
And I had times when I worked in
Hospitality Rose, like, I hate 

337
00:16:33,100 --> 00:16:34,000
this. 
This is bullshit. 

338
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,100
This is, you know, horrible 
work. 

339
00:16:36,100 --> 00:16:39,400
I'm getting paid shit money, 
like, blah, blah, blah, like I 

340
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:42,700
used to be so - sometimes and 
then I have other times where 

341
00:16:42,700 --> 00:16:45,600
I'm like, oh my gosh, I have 
Financial stability. 

342
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:49,500
Like, you know, I have an 
amazing like family or friends 

343
00:16:49,500 --> 00:16:53,600
or, you know, I have an amazing 
partner or, you know, I love 

344
00:16:53,600 --> 00:16:56,000
where I live right now when I 
moved to Australia, like, there 

345
00:16:56,008 --> 00:16:58,900
were so many things that I could
be grateful for along the whole 

346
00:16:58,900 --> 00:17:01,700
way. 
And the only time I really hated

347
00:17:01,700 --> 00:17:06,400
that job was when I didn't like 
me, you know, I didn't like my 

348
00:17:06,400 --> 00:17:09,200
life and so mindset is so, so 
important. 

349
00:17:09,200 --> 00:17:11,800
And that's really going to 
affect how you discipline 

350
00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,900
yourself as well. 
And I keep saying like 

351
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:18,099
discipline yourself. 
I don't mean like, like, like, 

352
00:17:18,099 --> 00:17:21,000
give yourself like consequences 
to when you do, like the quote 

353
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,400
unquote wrong thing. 
That's not what I'm saying. 

354
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,900
I just mean, like keeping 
yourself in check. 

355
00:17:25,900 --> 00:17:27,099
All right. 
Okay, whatever. 

356
00:17:27,099 --> 00:17:29,300
Let's get into it, three tips to
practicing. 

357
00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:34,000
Appling number one is narrowed 
down what it is that you want. 

358
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:35,700
That's going to be different for
everyone. 

359
00:17:35,700 --> 00:17:38,900
And what I want you to do 
before, you think what I you 

360
00:17:38,900 --> 00:17:43,600
know what is it that I want is 
be aware that you're going to be

361
00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:47,300
likely to think of things that 
you see like promoted on social 

362
00:17:47,300 --> 00:17:49,900
media like, okay, what I want to
do what's going to make me feel 

363
00:17:49,900 --> 00:17:54,000
discipline, getting up at 5 a.m.
every morning, going to the gym,

364
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:58,700
everyday, like yes, you can 
totally work in those kinds of 

365
00:17:58,700 --> 00:18:02,000
things like Adding up at a good 
time and doing things that make 

366
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:05,600
you feel good. 
But really like think about what

367
00:18:05,600 --> 00:18:10,200
you want that is. 
So so so key and as you're going

368
00:18:10,200 --> 00:18:12,800
through this episode, like I 
want you to actually think about

369
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,000
these things, like, write them 
down. 

370
00:18:14,000 --> 00:18:16,300
You're going to be so much more 
likely to actually do these 

371
00:18:16,300 --> 00:18:17,500
things. 
If you write them down right 

372
00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:20,300
now, and it'll take you two 
seconds as you're listening. 

373
00:18:20,300 --> 00:18:22,200
So I really encourage you to do 
that. 

374
00:18:22,400 --> 00:18:23,900
These things can absolutely 
change. 

375
00:18:23,900 --> 00:18:26,300
So, don't worry, if you're not a
hundred percent sure on them. 

376
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:28,900
Like, you don't have to really, 
really sit on them for too long,

377
00:18:29,000 --> 00:18:31,000
just write down. 
A few things that, you know, you

378
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,700
want to do maybe in the next 
month, maybe in the next five 

379
00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:36,900
years, this can be like a job 
that you're going into for a 

380
00:18:36,900 --> 00:18:41,000
little bit or, you know, just 
something you want to take on 

381
00:18:41,000 --> 00:18:45,200
like, getting into reading or 
maybe like doing a season of 

382
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:48,100
something like, a season of like
dance at, like a dance studio or

383
00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:52,300
like getting into like a 
five-week program for like art 

384
00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:53,500
or some shit like that, you 
know? 

385
00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:55,200
I mean it can be temporary, 
don't worry. 

386
00:18:55,500 --> 00:18:59,200
And lastly here is to ask 
yourself why you want these 

387
00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:02,700
things. 
Again, think about do they align

388
00:19:02,700 --> 00:19:06,700
with my values? 
Like it are you making these 

389
00:19:06,700 --> 00:19:09,200
decisions that saying you want 
to do these things because you 

390
00:19:09,208 --> 00:19:10,200
think? 
Well, that's good. 

391
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:14,000
You know, it's good, right? 
Or is it because you actually 

392
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:15,800
want it, right? 
Is it a general thing or is it 

393
00:19:15,800 --> 00:19:17,800
to you? 
Make sure it's you, make sure it

394
00:19:17,800 --> 00:19:21,000
follows your intuition, make 
sure you're being aware of like 

395
00:19:21,000 --> 00:19:24,400
your talents in the things that 
you really have to offer and 

396
00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:28,800
like lean into those things. 
And again be aware. 

397
00:19:28,900 --> 00:19:30,500
Are you doing this? 
This because you think it's 

398
00:19:30,500 --> 00:19:34,800
expected of you from your family
or a partner or Society. 

399
00:19:35,100 --> 00:19:37,600
Just take a second to ask 
yourself those things before you

400
00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:41,300
go and write them down. 
And really consider why I think 

401
00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:43,900
knowing your, why is probably 
one of the biggest things that 

402
00:19:43,900 --> 00:19:47,500
is going to motivate you. 
At least, for me, if I'm like, 

403
00:19:47,800 --> 00:19:51,600
oh, I want to make sure that I 
drink two liters of water. 

404
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:54,400
Every single day I can say to 
myself. 

405
00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:56,900
Oh, drinking water is healthy 
and necessary. 

406
00:19:57,000 --> 00:19:59,500
Sure, obviously, you know, we 
all know. 

407
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:04,500
But if I actually know, okay, 
drinking water is going to help 

408
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:07,300
me like reduce Cravings, which 
means that I'm going to stop, 

409
00:20:07,300 --> 00:20:10,000
like having all these little 
snacks all day, which I, my body

410
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,100
actually needs to be able to, 
like, process the food that I 

411
00:20:12,108 --> 00:20:15,400
put in a 2 into it for me to, 
like, have energy and use that 

412
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:18,800
energy. 
I also am going to avoid, like, 

413
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:23,700
messing up my like blood sugar 
and like, you know, help all of 

414
00:20:23,700 --> 00:20:26,400
that drinking water will help my
skin. 

415
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:29,500
It'll help me to feel more 
energized it. 

416
00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:31,500
Really affects my brain in my 
mental health. 

417
00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:33,500
I know all of that, you know I 
know the facts. 

418
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:37,200
I know the why and that is going
to be so motivating. 

419
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:39,600
So yes, let's narrow it down. 
Figure out what you want. 

420
00:20:39,600 --> 00:20:41,800
Okay. 
Number 2, we're going to set 

421
00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:45,800
some goals and intentions around
the things that you want and 

422
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:49,000
these are like real markers of 
your progress. 

423
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:52,100
Like for me one at the start of 
the year was that I wanted to 

424
00:20:52,100 --> 00:20:55,600
quit vaping which I've talked 
about in the last few episodes, 

425
00:20:55,600 --> 00:21:00,000
I think at some point, but 
vaping was something that I Wit 

426
00:21:00,000 --> 00:21:04,900
like two years ago and then I 
started again like a year ago 

427
00:21:04,900 --> 00:21:07,900
which sucked because I literally
started I Vaped from the time I 

428
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:12,600
was like 16 all the way through 
to about two years ago stopped 

429
00:21:12,600 --> 00:21:14,200
for a year. 
Did so good. 

430
00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,700
I was like fuck yeah and then I 
got back into it because my 

431
00:21:16,700 --> 00:21:19,100
partner started vaping so then I
was just around it and I was 

432
00:21:19,100 --> 00:21:21,500
like oh let me have some and 
then from there I just that was 

433
00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:26,800
my downfall but since then I 
have quit and it's been about a 

434
00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:31,100
month now just over a month that
That I am have quit and it's 

435
00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:33,500
been so, so, so good. 
And I already feeling like a 

436
00:21:33,508 --> 00:21:36,000
million times better. 
And that's so if it's something 

437
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:39,100
like that where you know, it's 
like I want to do this, one 

438
00:21:39,100 --> 00:21:44,400
specific thing, write that down 
and then from there, you also 

439
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:47,500
want to write down what you need
to do to accomplish it. 

440
00:21:47,500 --> 00:21:51,000
So it's not just like the goal. 
It's also like the intention and

441
00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:53,900
the real marker. 
So, for me, I might also want to

442
00:21:53,900 --> 00:21:57,000
write under that, or I might 
want to do have write down 

443
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,400
written down. 
Um, throw out all my videos. 

444
00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:02,300
Right. 
That could be one, tell all 

445
00:22:02,300 --> 00:22:05,100
these people in my circle that 
I'm quitting vaping so that they

446
00:22:05,100 --> 00:22:08,100
don't offer it to me and they 
know to, you know, be aware that

447
00:22:08,100 --> 00:22:11,600
that's something that I'm doing.
What else do think of things 

448
00:22:11,600 --> 00:22:15,000
that I can replace like drinking
water, like get a nice water 

449
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:19,900
bottle out of want to drink out 
of more or find, a nicotine free

450
00:22:19,900 --> 00:22:23,700
vape that I can use as like a 
placeholder as I get used to 

451
00:22:23,700 --> 00:22:26,400
getting rid of like that 
mouthfeel or whatever all those 

452
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:30,100
little things right down 
specifics because it Is very 

453
00:22:30,100 --> 00:22:33,300
common that people will have a 
big goal that they want to do 

454
00:22:33,500 --> 00:22:37,400
and they think all do it one day
and you don't do it because 

455
00:22:38,100 --> 00:22:40,700
there is no one day. 
You know, you don't suddenly 

456
00:22:40,700 --> 00:22:42,400
arrive and go, huh? 
Would you look at that? 

457
00:22:42,400 --> 00:22:44,100
I suddenly have all of this free
time? 

458
00:22:44,100 --> 00:22:45,900
What should I do with it? 
Maybe I'll write a book. 

459
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:48,200
No, okay. 
Obviously doesn't have that way.

460
00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:51,900
People write a page at a time, 
you know, people put out an 

461
00:22:51,900 --> 00:22:57,500
episode at a time, people like 
build their wardrobe, one piece 

462
00:22:57,500 --> 00:22:59,400
at a time, you know, they invest
in. 

463
00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,600
One thing at a time, they, if 
you're literally invest, invest 

464
00:23:02,600 --> 00:23:05,200
in like, one stock at a time or 
like, put in little bits of 

465
00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:09,700
money, bit at a time, like, you 
build, you know, and building is

466
00:23:09,700 --> 00:23:13,700
so important, I think seeing the
value and like building, and the

467
00:23:13,700 --> 00:23:18,400
journey is so, so, so important 
and like fun, like meeting those

468
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:21,400
little markers along the way 
that you get to celebrate is so 

469
00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:22,800
exciting. 
Like, oh my god, I've written 

470
00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:25,700
the first 50 pages of my book. 
Ah, that's amazing. 

471
00:23:25,700 --> 00:23:29,400
You know last week we hit 50 
episodes and I was so excited. 

472
00:23:29,500 --> 00:23:32,400
Cited and you know I could sit 
here and I could go oh well it's

473
00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:35,700
not 100, know it's 50 and that's
awesome. 

474
00:23:35,700 --> 00:23:38,400
You know, and you should be 
proud of yourself along the way 

475
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:41,500
and be aware of what those 
markers are that you want to hit

476
00:23:41,500 --> 00:23:44,000
as you go through because it's 
powerful. 

477
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:46,000
And again, it's like it's the 
journey. 

478
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:50,100
So, figure out what you actually
need to do to get there, so that

479
00:23:50,100 --> 00:23:52,700
end result doesn't feel so. 
So far away. 

480
00:23:53,100 --> 00:23:58,000
Maybe you want to, like I said, 
start having this wardrobe that 

481
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,200
really suits you and you're 
thinking, Oh my god. 

482
00:24:00,200 --> 00:24:02,400
Well, I'm never going to get 
there because a I don't have any

483
00:24:02,400 --> 00:24:03,700
money. 
I don't have this, I don't have 

484
00:24:03,700 --> 00:24:06,300
that. 
You can shut it down or you can 

485
00:24:06,300 --> 00:24:10,800
sit here and you can go, okay, I
want to save up like 20 bucks a 

486
00:24:10,808 --> 00:24:12,900
month or I want to save $100 a 
month. 

487
00:24:12,900 --> 00:24:16,300
I imagine, you know, and I'm 
going to spend that on clothing 

488
00:24:16,400 --> 00:24:19,300
and every time I buy something, 
I'm going to swap it out and I'm

489
00:24:19,300 --> 00:24:22,200
going to get rid of something 
that I don't wear anymore and so

490
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:24,200
you don't ever get to a place 
where like I don't have any 

491
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:27,000
clothes, you know, but you're 
still working on intentionally 

492
00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:29,300
building something that's going 
to last you a long time. 

493
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:33,400
And of course are going to 
support ethical Brands and you 

494
00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:36,700
are going to not hoard, all of 
your things, you're going to get

495
00:24:36,700 --> 00:24:38,700
rid of things that you don't 
wear, because you want to have a

496
00:24:38,708 --> 00:24:41,100
clear space and a clear mind. 
Okay. 

497
00:24:41,100 --> 00:24:45,200
Amazing, let's do it. 
Alright, Point number three is 

498
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:51,200
to know when to push yourself 
versus when to listen to your 

499
00:24:51,200 --> 00:24:54,700
body, slasher intuition /, your 
mental health, / your menstrual 

500
00:24:54,700 --> 00:24:57,400
cycle, okay? 
Because sometimes there's going 

501
00:24:57,400 --> 00:25:00,000
to be a time to push yourself 
and sometimes Is going to be a 

502
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:03,000
time to rest and this is what I 
really want to talk about is 

503
00:25:03,400 --> 00:25:08,600
this kind of like pull back and 
forth between like uh I think 

504
00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:12,200
what my body's trying to tell me
is that I need a nap versus like

505
00:25:12,300 --> 00:25:13,800
okay. 
Yes, but you had a nap every 

506
00:25:13,800 --> 00:25:16,400
single day this week and like 
maybe it's time that you just 

507
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:18,900
like get the task over with 
because you're gonna feel so 

508
00:25:18,900 --> 00:25:21,100
like satisfied and motivated 
that you did it. 

509
00:25:21,100 --> 00:25:24,900
You know, know what that 
threshold is for you and become 

510
00:25:24,900 --> 00:25:27,500
aware of it. 
Like I've said in literally, 

511
00:25:27,500 --> 00:25:31,400
every episode is menstrual All 
tracking and cycle syncing is 

512
00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:34,100
going to be your best friend 
here because maybe around 

513
00:25:34,100 --> 00:25:36,300
ovulation. 
You're going to be like, okay, I

514
00:25:36,300 --> 00:25:38,500
can definitely push myself. 
I definitely have the energy. 

515
00:25:38,500 --> 00:25:40,900
Let's fucking go. 
And then when it's like period 

516
00:25:40,900 --> 00:25:43,300
time, it's okay to be like mmm. 
No. 

517
00:25:43,300 --> 00:25:45,600
Look, there's just no chance 
that I'm going to be completing 

518
00:25:45,600 --> 00:25:49,200
all this shit right now and 
that's fine like it's so worth 

519
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:52,200
being aware of that and I would 
definitely recommend doing that 

520
00:25:52,200 --> 00:25:54,800
because then you can have a lot 
more grace for yourself on the 

521
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:57,300
days where it just is not 
possible for you to get certain 

522
00:25:57,300 --> 00:26:00,500
things done and that's really 
cool and Is also motivating for 

523
00:26:00,500 --> 00:26:03,700
you when you realize that you're
in a phase of your cycle where 

524
00:26:03,700 --> 00:26:06,200
you naturally would have more 
energy because you're like, oh 

525
00:26:06,200 --> 00:26:08,300
yeah like that's true, I forgot.
I'm in this. 

526
00:26:08,300 --> 00:26:11,400
Okay, great, let's go, let's go,
you know, you can feel more 

527
00:26:11,400 --> 00:26:14,200
motivated by it and even if you 
aren't check your menstrual 

528
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:16,800
cycle or not you don't have one 
you know, and you're not doing 

529
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:19,500
it that way. 
Or on top of it, use a 

530
00:26:19,500 --> 00:26:22,600
recognize, what patterns in your
life are in aren't working. 

531
00:26:22,700 --> 00:26:27,500
This is huge. 
Like start considering every 

532
00:26:27,500 --> 00:26:30,300
single day of the week I did 
this a few Ooh, weeks ago and it

533
00:26:30,300 --> 00:26:33,400
has changed my life so far, and 
it's only been a few weeks. 

534
00:26:33,500 --> 00:26:36,500
I actually sat down, this took 
me like an hour and I wrote 

535
00:26:36,500 --> 00:26:39,900
down, like Sunday through 
Saturday, on a piece of paper. 

536
00:26:40,700 --> 00:26:44,300
And I wrote down for every day, 
what I typically do on that day.

537
00:26:44,300 --> 00:26:46,800
So every Monday, for example, I 
get up at 5 a.m. 

538
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,000
I teach Pilates six, seven, 
eight. 

539
00:26:49,100 --> 00:26:52,600
I then do a pilates class at 
9:30 and then I come home, I 

540
00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:55,700
shower, I eat. 
All of that is wrapped up before

541
00:26:55,700 --> 00:26:58,200
noon, right? 
I know that happens every single

542
00:26:58,200 --> 00:26:59,000
Monday. 
Boom. 

543
00:26:59,100 --> 00:27:00,800
I know. 
For for sure, for sure, for 

544
00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:04,600
sure, that's what's happening. 
Then after that I can think, how

545
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:06,700
do I normally feel after that? 
Do I feel motivated? 

546
00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:08,300
Do I feel like I just want to 
lay in bed? 

547
00:27:08,300 --> 00:27:12,800
Do I feel like I want to write 
or record or is it like, a day 

548
00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:14,700
when I would want to do my 
makeup and I'm feeling super 

549
00:27:14,700 --> 00:27:16,500
like extroverted or like, not 
really. 

550
00:27:16,700 --> 00:27:19,500
Is this a day when I'm feeling 
like, oh, I'm excited for Sam to

551
00:27:19,500 --> 00:27:22,300
come home and we could go on a 
date or a Miami tired, because I

552
00:27:22,308 --> 00:27:25,100
woke up early. 
I really consider what is my 

553
00:27:25,100 --> 00:27:28,500
perfect day, every single day 
and then, you can obviously by 

554
00:27:28,500 --> 00:27:31,000
the end of that figure. 
Out what your perfect week looks

555
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:34,700
like, obviously, yes, things 
change week to week, but it's a 

556
00:27:34,700 --> 00:27:37,100
really good way for you to get a
grasp on what your life looks 

557
00:27:37,100 --> 00:27:39,600
like. 
Because if you aren't aware of 

558
00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:43,300
what your typical patterns are, 
your typical habits are, then 

559
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,500
you're not going to change that 
you're not going to be able to 

560
00:27:45,500 --> 00:27:47,600
change them because you're not 
even going to know where to add 

561
00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:50,600
and where to take away your not 
mindful of it and mindfulness is

562
00:27:50,600 --> 00:27:52,100
so. 
So so important. 

563
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:56,000
So for example, I can look at 
that and I can go o Monday 

564
00:27:56,000 --> 00:28:00,600
afternoon, I'm always exhausted.
Is that because On Sunday night,

565
00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:04,200
I am not planning to go to sleep
early is that because I am not 

566
00:28:04,200 --> 00:28:08,000
prioritizing Sunday as like a 
self-care relax? 

567
00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:11,400
Refresh, kind of day if so, how 
can I do that? 

568
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:14,500
Is that possible for me? 
You know, and I learned yes, it 

569
00:28:14,500 --> 00:28:17,200
is. 
And now Sam my partner. 

570
00:28:17,400 --> 00:28:19,300
I've been able to say to him 
Sunday nights from. 

571
00:28:19,300 --> 00:28:22,400
Now, on our a chill night. 
They're not a going out at 

572
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:24,700
night. 
They are a reading in bed kind 

573
00:28:24,700 --> 00:28:27,000
of night. 
They are 80 kind of night. 

574
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:29,300
They are a no drinking Kind of 
Night. 

575
00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:33,100
They are a night for me to 
refresh and wake up at 5 a.m. 

576
00:28:33,100 --> 00:28:36,900
genuinely with energy and go 
into my day and feel good in 

577
00:28:36,900 --> 00:28:40,000
this past Monday, guys. 
I woke up at 5 a.m. and I was 

578
00:28:40,000 --> 00:28:42,700
like glowing. 
I was so happy, I felt so good. 

579
00:28:42,700 --> 00:28:44,900
I was like, what the fuck? 
And they just had the best day. 

580
00:28:44,900 --> 00:28:47,800
Like I literally best day this 
week was Monday by far. 

581
00:28:47,800 --> 00:28:51,500
And I woke up at 5 a.m. and to 
me, I'm not someone who 

582
00:28:51,500 --> 00:28:54,000
naturally wakes up early and I 
do not enjoy waking up early, 

583
00:28:54,000 --> 00:28:56,600
like I do not enjoy it. 
I wake up and I usually feel 

584
00:28:56,600 --> 00:29:01,100
like shit, but because I 
actually, Myself up like I set 

585
00:29:01,100 --> 00:29:03,700
myself up for a win and it felt 
so good. 

586
00:29:03,700 --> 00:29:07,400
So I'd really encourage you to 
consider what happens in your 

587
00:29:07,400 --> 00:29:10,100
week day-to-day. 
Write it down. 

588
00:29:10,200 --> 00:29:13,600
Actually take the time to do 
this, especially as we're going 

589
00:29:13,600 --> 00:29:15,600
into 2023. 
I mean, it's already February, 

590
00:29:15,700 --> 00:29:20,000
but as we're continuing into 
2023, especially if you have 

591
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,300
things that you wanted to do in 
the New Year, things that you 

592
00:29:22,300 --> 00:29:24,400
wrote down in January that you 
didn't get done. 

593
00:29:24,700 --> 00:29:28,900
Let's take another approach and 
let's consider you know what are

594
00:29:28,900 --> 00:29:30,500
we actually? 
We doing right now, before we 

595
00:29:30,500 --> 00:29:33,000
try to add. 
And another reason why I say 

596
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:37,800
this is because habit, tracking 
and habit, stacking is really 

597
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:39,600
valuable. 
And something that I learned 

598
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:42,500
through the book Atomic habits, 
which I would very much 

599
00:29:42,500 --> 00:29:44,700
recommend. 
It is very, it's a very, very 

600
00:29:44,700 --> 00:29:47,600
popular book. 
I'll also link it below for you 

601
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:48,800
guys. 
And I've talked about it a bunch

602
00:29:48,800 --> 00:29:53,900
of times, but in this book, the 
author will talk about having 

603
00:29:53,900 --> 00:29:57,600
habits in your day-to-day life 
and adding in habits around 

604
00:29:57,600 --> 00:30:00,100
those habits. 
So that you get Extra things 

605
00:30:00,100 --> 00:30:01,900
done. 
And the example that really 

606
00:30:01,900 --> 00:30:05,900
stood out to me, I probably 
mentioned before on here is the 

607
00:30:05,900 --> 00:30:08,700
coffee machine one. 
Because if every day you wake 

608
00:30:08,700 --> 00:30:10,800
up, you make yourself a coffee 
and it's the first thing that 

609
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:13,400
you put in your stomach. 
It's really not great for you. 

610
00:30:13,400 --> 00:30:16,100
If it's really bad for, like 
your cortisol levels and it 

611
00:30:16,100 --> 00:30:19,800
really can just mess up your 
stomach if, you know, you know, 

612
00:30:20,400 --> 00:30:23,900
and it's not great. 
And so if you can at least at 

613
00:30:23,900 --> 00:30:27,800
least get in a glass of water 
before you go for that coffee, a

614
00:30:27,800 --> 00:30:30,000
really good way to do that. 
Is if you are Already know that.

615
00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:32,400
You make coffee every single 
morning for yourself, then every

616
00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:35,100
night before bed, you're going 
to put out a little glass on 

617
00:30:35,100 --> 00:30:37,400
your coffee machine, so it's 
your prompt to go. 

618
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:40,000
Oh yeah, true. 
I need to have a glass of water 

619
00:30:40,000 --> 00:30:43,000
before I have my coffee and it's
like setting yourself up. 

620
00:30:43,000 --> 00:30:45,100
These little tiny things that 
you're putting in place for 

621
00:30:45,100 --> 00:30:46,900
yourself. 
So that you feel better 

622
00:30:46,900 --> 00:30:49,000
throughout your day, one that 
I've implemented recently is 

623
00:30:49,000 --> 00:30:50,700
making my bed. 
I never used to make my bed. 

624
00:30:50,700 --> 00:30:52,300
I always used to be like my do I
make it? 

625
00:30:52,300 --> 00:30:55,600
I'm just gonna get back in it 
again, LOL, but I've learned 

626
00:30:55,600 --> 00:30:59,700
that, if I make my bed, I'm 
likely way more likely You 

627
00:30:59,700 --> 00:31:02,600
actually like follow my morning 
routine and feel like I've 

628
00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:05,700
refreshed and then stay out of 
bed because a lot of the time I 

629
00:31:05,700 --> 00:31:08,300
work from home, you know? 
So I'm like okay if I make my 

630
00:31:08,300 --> 00:31:10,900
bed then it takes me a second 
before I go. 

631
00:31:11,100 --> 00:31:13,700
Oh do I want to mess it up? 
And then I don't normally get in

632
00:31:13,700 --> 00:31:15,900
it. 
You know it also means that like

633
00:31:16,100 --> 00:31:19,200
if my sheets are flat I like 
take my laundry. 

634
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,700
If I sit on the floor I put out 
my bed, I'm more likely to then 

635
00:31:21,700 --> 00:31:24,100
want to put it away instead of 
just like leaving on the floor. 

636
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,600
So for me I'm learning these 
little things that work for me 

637
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,900
and it's making my life so much 
more seamless. 

638
00:31:28,900 --> 00:31:32,700
So Really, really encourage you.
Figure out what your habits are 

639
00:31:32,900 --> 00:31:36,500
and then from there Implement. 
So going back to step, number 

640
00:31:36,500 --> 00:31:40,700
two, the goals, the intentions, 
the plan that you set, for this 

641
00:31:40,700 --> 00:31:42,900
thing, you want to accomplish, 
say, you're like me and you want

642
00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:45,500
to write a book, okay? 
So you write down, I want to 

643
00:31:45,508 --> 00:31:47,000
write a book, okay? 
How do I write a book? 

644
00:31:47,000 --> 00:31:48,800
Okay, first of all, I don't know
how the fuck to write a book. 

645
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:50,600
Okay, let's figure out. 
We're gonna do some research, 

646
00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:53,500
maybe that's Point number one, 
maybe I'm going to do a little 

647
00:31:53,500 --> 00:31:55,700
brainstorm. 
Think about books that I've read

648
00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:59,700
that I could do a similar vibe 
to maybe from there, I To think 

649
00:31:59,700 --> 00:32:04,500
about individual chapters, you 
know, maybe from there, I want 

650
00:32:04,500 --> 00:32:06,200
to think about stories and 
things. 

651
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:08,800
I want to tell within those 
chapters, maybe I want to think 

652
00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:11,600
about, like overall theme stuff.
You know, there's so much. 

653
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:14,800
I maybe I make that little list 
of things then from there, I can

654
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:16,500
go. 
Okay, let's apply this. 

655
00:32:16,500 --> 00:32:20,500
What a my life already look 
like, okay, every maybe Tuesday 

656
00:32:20,500 --> 00:32:22,100
night, I'm free. 
Okay. 

657
00:32:22,100 --> 00:32:25,700
What if I gave myself 30 minutes
every Tuesday night to just 

658
00:32:25,700 --> 00:32:27,800
consider the book? 
That doesn't mean I have to 

659
00:32:27,800 --> 00:32:30,400
write anything, that doesn't 
mean Do I have to have any kind 

660
00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:32,600
of output? 
That just means that for 30 

661
00:32:32,600 --> 00:32:33,100
minutes? 
I go. 

662
00:32:33,100 --> 00:32:35,100
This is 30 minutes or I'm not 
gonna look at my phone. 

663
00:32:35,100 --> 00:32:37,400
I'm going to think about this 
book and I'm going to do 

664
00:32:37,400 --> 00:32:39,400
something for the book. 
And I'm just going to give 

665
00:32:39,400 --> 00:32:41,800
myself the space, to grow this 
thing, naturally and 

666
00:32:41,800 --> 00:32:43,800
intuitively. 
And if you can allow yourself, 

667
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:46,900
that space, you can pull up that
little, you know, list of things

668
00:32:46,900 --> 00:32:49,500
that you need to do to work on 
that thing and you can go. 

669
00:32:49,500 --> 00:32:50,800
Okay. 
I think this is something I 

670
00:32:50,808 --> 00:32:51,900
would actually like to do right 
now. 

671
00:32:51,900 --> 00:32:54,500
Some research, you know, maybe 
this is something I actually 

672
00:32:54,500 --> 00:32:57,600
would want to do is think about 
what stories are themes in my 

673
00:32:57,600 --> 00:32:58,700
life. 
I think would be valuable to 

674
00:32:58,700 --> 00:33:01,400
share it with You know, you 
really start to break it down 

675
00:33:01,600 --> 00:33:04,300
and then you realize what's 
valuable what's not? 

676
00:33:04,400 --> 00:33:06,900
And you can just start to pull 
from, I guess what? 

677
00:33:06,900 --> 00:33:08,100
You know what, you're working 
towards. 

678
00:33:08,100 --> 00:33:11,100
So I really, really, really 
encourage you to do that. 

679
00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:16,000
Alright, now I want to talk 
quickly about why you might be 

680
00:33:16,000 --> 00:33:19,200
struggling with discipline. 
A lot of people do struggle with

681
00:33:19,200 --> 00:33:22,400
discipline struggle with getting
tasks done. 

682
00:33:22,600 --> 00:33:24,400
And I think it's important that 
in this episode. 

683
00:33:24,400 --> 00:33:27,700
At some point I do mention that 
mental health is a huge Factor 

684
00:33:27,700 --> 00:33:32,100
here, especially Lee ADHD is a 
really, really big one, and so 

685
00:33:32,100 --> 00:33:33,500
much more common than you would 
think. 

686
00:33:33,500 --> 00:33:37,600
And also very undiagnosed with 
in women because it shows very 

687
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:39,600
differently in women if you 
aren't aware of this. 

688
00:33:39,600 --> 00:33:43,500
And so if you potentially have 
something like ADHD, yes, you 

689
00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:47,200
are going to be much more likely
to get distracted or to struggle

690
00:33:47,200 --> 00:33:51,500
to get tasks done, which just 
means that you need these tips 

691
00:33:51,500 --> 00:33:53,300
more than anybody else. 
Okay. 

692
00:33:53,400 --> 00:33:55,300
So don't think oh, well, I have 
ADHD. 

693
00:33:55,300 --> 00:33:57,500
So that's why I struggle and 
that's why I am the way I am and

694
00:33:57,500 --> 00:34:00,900
like, oh, that's why I have to 
This way, that's my destiny. 

695
00:34:01,100 --> 00:34:03,800
Don't allow yourself to go there
and the reason I'm saying this 

696
00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:06,100
is not because I have ADHD but 
because I have struggled my 

697
00:34:06,100 --> 00:34:07,500
mental health, I've struggled 
anxiety. 

698
00:34:07,700 --> 00:34:10,500
And I know that when I said to 
myself, oh, I'm an anxious 

699
00:34:10,500 --> 00:34:12,300
person. 
It makes me more anxious. 

700
00:34:12,400 --> 00:34:15,199
You know, when I say oh well you
know, I haven't xiety. 

701
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:17,900
It makes me more likely to go. 
Well, I can't go out to that 

702
00:34:17,900 --> 00:34:20,800
event because I just know, you 
know, I have anxiety. 

703
00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:24,699
So I'm not going to want to like
you, you really become it when 

704
00:34:24,699 --> 00:34:27,800
you talk about it that way. 
And what I want you to do is 

705
00:34:27,800 --> 00:34:32,500
instead of saying, you know, no,
I have anxiety or have ADHD or 

706
00:34:32,500 --> 00:34:36,400
like I am this thing, try to 
separate yourself and say, you 

707
00:34:36,400 --> 00:34:39,699
know what, yes, I do have this 
thing and I can even talk about 

708
00:34:39,699 --> 00:34:41,600
it and like, you know, share 
about it. 

709
00:34:41,600 --> 00:34:43,600
Be completely open about it. 
There's no shame in it. 

710
00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:48,199
But I also don't have to 
experience that thing. 24/7. 

711
00:34:48,199 --> 00:34:51,400
And I can make choices on a 
regular basis to work towards 

712
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,800
not experiencing symptoms of 
that issue, like anxiety or 

713
00:34:54,800 --> 00:34:59,500
ADHD, or depression, etc, etc. 
And yes, this is only The 

714
00:34:59,500 --> 00:35:01,600
certain extent. 
I do not want to be insensitive 

715
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:05,300
at all because it's very easy to
say to someone, like just 

716
00:35:05,300 --> 00:35:08,700
pretend you don't have anxiety. 
Like I'm not saying that, but 

717
00:35:08,700 --> 00:35:11,700
definitely be aware that if you 
speak it over yourself 

718
00:35:11,700 --> 00:35:15,100
constantly. 
If you act like that is who you 

719
00:35:15,100 --> 00:35:18,700
are, then you will continue to 
be that thing until you actually

720
00:35:18,700 --> 00:35:21,400
start to use the coping 
mechanisms that, hopefully, you 

721
00:35:21,400 --> 00:35:25,700
are getting through research or 
working with the psychologist or

722
00:35:25,700 --> 00:35:28,100
counselor. 
Whatever that is, you actually 

723
00:35:28,100 --> 00:35:30,400
use those things and Work 
towards finding those Solutions 

724
00:35:30,400 --> 00:35:34,200
and finding the things that work
for you because once you do, you

725
00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:37,000
can still have anxiety, but you 
can still be a fucking 

726
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:39,600
Powerhouse. 
You know, you can have ADHD and 

727
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:43,400
you can still be in control, and
you can still be confident and 

728
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:45,100
you can still be motivated and 
disciplined. 

729
00:35:45,100 --> 00:35:48,600
You just have to lean into these
things and be aware that you 

730
00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:49,800
might need this a little bit 
more. 

731
00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:54,300
Not just ADHD, of course, having
anxieties and other one like, 

732
00:35:54,300 --> 00:35:57,400
you know, procrastination and 
feeling like, oh this is a big 

733
00:35:57,400 --> 00:35:58,800
task, I don't want to do it, you
know. 

734
00:35:59,200 --> 00:36:01,300
In your head about it. 
That's a big one that I've 

735
00:36:01,300 --> 00:36:05,000
struggled with depression. 
Absolutely is a big one because 

736
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:08,200
of the motivation issue. 
You know, definitely have felt 

737
00:36:08,200 --> 00:36:11,100
that one before and obviously 
there's so many more things as 

738
00:36:11,100 --> 00:36:12,200
well when it comes to mental 
health. 

739
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:13,300
So I just want to be aware of 
that. 

740
00:36:13,300 --> 00:36:15,200
That is a reason you may 
struggle with it. 

741
00:36:15,200 --> 00:36:18,300
You may struggle with discipline
be aware of that, but know that 

742
00:36:18,300 --> 00:36:20,700
it doesn't mean that you can't 
be disciplined because you 

743
00:36:20,700 --> 00:36:24,500
absolutely can. 
Also, if you come from a 

744
00:36:24,500 --> 00:36:27,300
background, like I did where I 
noticed that I was fighting 

745
00:36:27,300 --> 00:36:29,200
discipline because it reminded 
me. 

746
00:36:29,200 --> 00:36:31,600
Me of this like church and 
religious trauma. 

747
00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:34,800
This trauma that I held that was
like, you know, I'm being told 

748
00:36:34,800 --> 00:36:37,400
what to do constantly and I 
always felt out of control. 

749
00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:40,300
I always felt like my life 
wasn't my own life and so the 

750
00:36:40,300 --> 00:36:42,600
moment I was able to leave the 
church and like come out as 

751
00:36:42,600 --> 00:36:46,200
bisexual and do the things that 
made me feel like I actually 

752
00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:48,800
deserve to have a life that I 
wanted. 

753
00:36:48,900 --> 00:36:55,300
It just like put this idea of 
having discipline or yeah being 

754
00:36:55,300 --> 00:36:58,200
told what to do in like this 
horrible light and it made me 

755
00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:01,600
really uncomfortable with Idea 
of rules and blah blah blah. 

756
00:37:01,800 --> 00:37:04,900
Whereas now I feel like I can 
own it in a way where it's 

757
00:37:04,900 --> 00:37:08,700
actually useful to me and it is 
self-love like it's me showing 

758
00:37:08,700 --> 00:37:10,800
myself. 
I fucking love me. 

759
00:37:11,000 --> 00:37:14,300
I love the things that I'm going
to provide in my life for me. 

760
00:37:14,600 --> 00:37:17,000
You know, I love when I get to 
the end of the day and I've 

761
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:20,800
completed XYZ that I told myself
I was going to do and it's 

762
00:37:20,800 --> 00:37:23,900
motivating and it feels good. 
And it's proof to me that I can 

763
00:37:23,900 --> 00:37:27,100
do hard things, and I can show 
up for myself. 

764
00:37:27,100 --> 00:37:30,700
And I really feel like that is 
the Things that should like I 

765
00:37:30,707 --> 00:37:34,800
want to drive home today is that
you deserve to put yourself 

766
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:37,900
forward for yourself. 
You know, you do things for 

767
00:37:37,900 --> 00:37:41,300
yourself because you love 
yourself and you want to work 

768
00:37:41,300 --> 00:37:44,300
towards a better life. 
You know, you have an image of 

769
00:37:44,300 --> 00:37:47,500
this life that you want in your 
head and you are actively 

770
00:37:47,500 --> 00:37:50,500
working towards it and if you 
actively work towards it you 

771
00:37:50,500 --> 00:37:52,000
will get fulfillment out of 
that. 

772
00:37:52,000 --> 00:37:55,200
You will feel good about 
yourself because you know, that 

773
00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:57,600
you are doing that in your 
proving to yourself that you 

774
00:37:57,600 --> 00:38:01,400
love yourself and for Quitting 
vaping was a big one, like it 

775
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:04,100
was big, big, big for me. 
And I even noticed that a few 

776
00:38:04,100 --> 00:38:06,600
weeks, like, I suddenly started 
feeling and I talk, I talked 

777
00:38:06,600 --> 00:38:09,800
about some Tick-Tock that would 
actually, I started feeling so 

778
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:13,200
much better about myself. 
Like, I feel like, I really 

779
00:38:13,200 --> 00:38:15,700
believed that I could write a 
book. 

780
00:38:15,700 --> 00:38:18,500
You know, I really believe that 
I could do these things that in 

781
00:38:18,500 --> 00:38:21,700
my mind, maybe a year ago would 
have seemed really scary or 

782
00:38:21,700 --> 00:38:24,200
maybe even a month ago, would 
have seemed really scary, but 

783
00:38:24,200 --> 00:38:25,800
the more I go. 
Holy shit. 

784
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:28,900
When I set my mind to something 
I fucking do it. 

785
00:38:29,200 --> 00:38:33,200
I'm like okay okay let's go like
I can do this and it feels 

786
00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:36,400
really really good. 
So I'd really encourage you to 

787
00:38:36,500 --> 00:38:42,200
be aware of why you might not be
great with discipline kind of 

788
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:45,000
understand, kind of the depths 
of what's going on because it 

789
00:38:45,000 --> 00:38:48,000
could be stopping. 
You like not working through 

790
00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:51,500
that trauma or not working 
through these realizations could

791
00:38:51,500 --> 00:38:54,700
be holding you back, and let's 
release those things as we 

792
00:38:54,700 --> 00:38:58,200
choose to go forward and show up
for ourselves, really? 

793
00:38:59,300 --> 00:39:01,300
I also think another one as 
well, even if you don't come 

794
00:39:01,300 --> 00:39:03,200
from like this church, religious
trauma or whatever. 

795
00:39:03,500 --> 00:39:06,700
Maybe, you just feel like it's 
like, oh, I'm in trouble, you 

796
00:39:06,700 --> 00:39:09,800
know, like, oh, I'm not allowed 
to do this, or I feel like I'm 

797
00:39:09,800 --> 00:39:12,800
in trouble. 
It can come back to the way you 

798
00:39:12,800 --> 00:39:16,200
were literally, like, 
disciplined as a child, all of 

799
00:39:16,200 --> 00:39:18,000
that. 
So just be aware of your history

800
00:39:18,000 --> 00:39:22,900
and think about that. 
And now that we talked about why

801
00:39:22,900 --> 00:39:25,200
you might struggle with 
discipline ways that you can do 

802
00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:30,000
that again, I want to talk about
the lack of Allen and what that 

803
00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:33,100
can do to you and maybe this 
will help you realize that this 

804
00:39:33,100 --> 00:39:37,700
is you, if this is you, first of
all, if you have a lack of 

805
00:39:37,700 --> 00:39:40,400
discipline, you're more likely 
to distance yourself from 

806
00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:43,800
friends and to not have very 
fulfilling friendships because 

807
00:39:43,900 --> 00:39:48,100
you don't like, you're not aware
that other people exist. 

808
00:39:48,300 --> 00:39:51,800
I mean, like, you don't really 
care and even if you would say, 

809
00:39:51,800 --> 00:39:54,200
oh, I love my friends or they 
love me or we don't need to see 

810
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:57,500
each other all the time. 
Because you don't prioritize 

811
00:39:57,500 --> 00:39:59,100
seeing them because you don't 
prioritize. 

812
00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:03,500
Is asking them about their lives
and and prioritize, like, let's 

813
00:40:03,500 --> 00:40:06,300
see each other once a week or 
whatever, you're more likely to 

814
00:40:06,300 --> 00:40:09,100
grow distant and usually, it 
happens over time and it can be 

815
00:40:09,100 --> 00:40:10,900
really sad and really 
disappointing. 

816
00:40:11,600 --> 00:40:16,000
So, it Courage you to be aware 
of what people you want to have 

817
00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:19,100
in your life and a little hot 
tip is something I love to do is

818
00:40:19,100 --> 00:40:21,300
to, like, be aware of like, my, 
like roster. 

819
00:40:21,300 --> 00:40:23,600
Like, that's like, I'll have 
five friends that I'm like, I'm 

820
00:40:23,600 --> 00:40:25,800
gonna obsess over them. 
And I want to see them, like, 

821
00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:29,100
once a week, or I want to talk 
to them at least once a week, or

822
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:33,400
You know, I want to be forward 
with being like I want to be 

823
00:40:33,400 --> 00:40:36,300
your friend, I want to spend 
time with you and people love 

824
00:40:36,300 --> 00:40:37,500
it. 
People reciprocated. 

825
00:40:37,500 --> 00:40:40,600
People love to like know that 
you want to be in their world 

826
00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:44,700
and it's very flattering and so 
many of us just especially with 

827
00:40:44,700 --> 00:40:46,500
social media. 
We feel like we're connected to 

828
00:40:46,500 --> 00:40:48,500
so many people even though we're
not. 

829
00:40:48,700 --> 00:40:50,900
So it can feel like why would 
someone want to be friends with 

830
00:40:50,900 --> 00:40:53,900
me, you know, when there's so 
much going on and why would 

831
00:40:53,900 --> 00:40:55,400
someone care to hang out with 
me? 

832
00:40:55,600 --> 00:40:56,900
If they're not getting something
out of it? 

833
00:40:56,900 --> 00:41:00,500
Like you can feel like you know,
where's my Value, it can be this

834
00:41:00,500 --> 00:41:03,000
weird feeling. 
And as much as you've connected 

835
00:41:03,000 --> 00:41:05,500
with so many people, you also 
like, don't connect on a deep 

836
00:41:05,500 --> 00:41:08,600
level and it can be very 
isolating, it can make you feel 

837
00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:12,500
very lonely and so if you can 
think of a few people, maybe you

838
00:41:12,508 --> 00:41:14,400
don't have five that you can 
think of right now. 

839
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:17,200
Maybe it's going to be one. 
Maybe it's going to be three. 

840
00:41:17,300 --> 00:41:20,800
Maybe you're gonna go listen to 
my making friends in your 20s 

841
00:41:20,800 --> 00:41:23,200
episode to figure out how to 
make new friends, okay? 

842
00:41:23,400 --> 00:41:27,200
Like do what you need to do, but
be aware that we don't have 

843
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:29,200
discipline in your life. 
It actually affects your A 

844
00:41:29,200 --> 00:41:32,300
ship's so much and it's not 
just, you know, friendships it's

845
00:41:32,300 --> 00:41:35,200
family, it's your partner, it's 
your boyfriend girlfriend, it's 

846
00:41:35,200 --> 00:41:38,000
whoever like it really can 
affect your relationships. 

847
00:41:38,500 --> 00:41:41,200
Another one number two is that 
you don't reach the goals that 

848
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:43,300
you want to reach and it can 
again be disappointing. 

849
00:41:43,300 --> 00:41:45,100
Like you look back and you go. 
Wow. 

850
00:41:45,100 --> 00:41:48,300
Last year I had on my New Year's
resolutions to do this thing and

851
00:41:48,300 --> 00:41:50,500
I literally have not touched 
that project. 

852
00:41:50,500 --> 00:41:54,400
I have not done it and it does 
the opposite of what having 

853
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:57,000
discipline does. 
It does the opposite of saying, 

854
00:41:57,000 --> 00:41:59,500
oh, you know, I'm someone who 
can do hard things, it You feel 

855
00:41:59,500 --> 00:42:02,100
like I can't do anything, it 
makes you feel like, you know, 

856
00:42:02,100 --> 00:42:05,400
I'm not worth putting myself 
forward for showing up for 

857
00:42:05,400 --> 00:42:07,800
because I don't show up for 
myself and you start to believe 

858
00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:10,100
things about yourself, like I'm 
lazy, right? 

859
00:42:10,100 --> 00:42:12,900
You start to say these things 
like all, you know, I'm just, I 

860
00:42:12,900 --> 00:42:15,300
procrastinate, I'm such a 
procrastinator, all. 

861
00:42:15,400 --> 00:42:17,600
And you just say all these 
things about yourself that don't

862
00:42:17,600 --> 00:42:21,600
have to be true, but you are 
proving over and over and over 

863
00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:25,600
because your brain is loving 
this idea of like narrative and 

864
00:42:25,600 --> 00:42:28,100
following the pathways that it 
always follows and there's no 

865
00:42:28,100 --> 00:42:30,900
change happening. 
And you'll probably be in this 

866
00:42:30,900 --> 00:42:34,400
position in a year from now. 
If you don't actively choose to 

867
00:42:34,400 --> 00:42:37,100
make these little changes now 
and that shouldn't be daunting 

868
00:42:37,100 --> 00:42:39,700
to you, it doesn't have to be 
scary, doesn't have to be like 

869
00:42:40,200 --> 00:42:44,100
oh wow like you know this big 
overnight change. 

870
00:42:44,100 --> 00:42:47,400
It doesn't have to be that in 
that probably isn't also going 

871
00:42:47,400 --> 00:42:51,800
to serve you as well as 
something like a small change 

872
00:42:51,800 --> 00:42:56,100
everyday will serve you. 
Number three, is not feeling a 

873
00:42:56,107 --> 00:42:58,800
sense of purpose and I think 
this is, you know, something a 

874
00:42:58,808 --> 00:43:00,700
touch Earlier, but something I 
think is really, really 

875
00:43:00,700 --> 00:43:03,400
important. 
Is you need to be, you know, in 

876
00:43:03,400 --> 00:43:07,200
community working on something 
feeling like you are active in 

877
00:43:07,200 --> 00:43:10,100
your life too, often feel a 
sense of happiness and a sense 

878
00:43:10,100 --> 00:43:12,100
of purpose. 
And I do think that, you know, 

879
00:43:12,107 --> 00:43:14,600
there are seasons. 
You know if you have a job or 

880
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:17,700
you're working towards something
and you take a week off, you 

881
00:43:17,700 --> 00:43:21,300
know, or you even like take a 
year off but you know what 

882
00:43:21,300 --> 00:43:23,600
you're doing it intentionally 
because you actually need it. 

883
00:43:23,600 --> 00:43:26,200
Maybe you've burnt out you know 
maybe as long as you know it's 

884
00:43:26,200 --> 00:43:29,100
intentional I think it's 
valuable but if you don't feel 

885
00:43:29,100 --> 00:43:30,600
Feel like you have a sense of 
purpose, feel like you're kind 

886
00:43:30,600 --> 00:43:32,300
of just floating in life and 
like you don't know what you 

887
00:43:32,300 --> 00:43:35,500
want to do with your life. 
It probably comes down to some 

888
00:43:35,500 --> 00:43:38,500
form of lacking discipline. 
And I've seen this in a lot of 

889
00:43:38,500 --> 00:43:40,500
my friends and a lot of people 
as well. 

890
00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:44,000
If you're feeling this, like, 
lack of direction and you don't 

891
00:43:44,000 --> 00:43:46,900
really know what you want to do 
with your life, sometimes, it 

892
00:43:46,900 --> 00:43:50,100
just comes down to choosing one 
thing and just going with it. 

893
00:43:50,100 --> 00:43:53,100
Like, when I started teaching 
Pilates, I wasn't like, oh my 

894
00:43:53,100 --> 00:43:54,100
God. 
I want to be a Pilates 

895
00:43:54,100 --> 00:43:58,200
instructor for my whole life. 
No, you know, I was like, this 

896
00:43:58,200 --> 00:44:00,000
would be fun. 
I I could do this. 

897
00:44:00,100 --> 00:44:02,000
I think I'd be good at it. 
I think it would be a challenge 

898
00:44:02,000 --> 00:44:03,600
for me. 
Why don't I try it? 

899
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:04,700
Why don't I put myself out 
there? 

900
00:44:04,700 --> 00:44:07,900
Why don't I just do it and so I 
just did it, you know, and it 

901
00:44:07,900 --> 00:44:11,900
wasn't easy, but it was cool. 
Like it was exciting and it was 

902
00:44:11,900 --> 00:44:13,500
something that made me feel 
motivated. 

903
00:44:13,500 --> 00:44:16,800
And again, it proved to me, I 
can do hard things, I can do 

904
00:44:16,800 --> 00:44:18,500
things that scare me. 
I can step out of my comfort 

905
00:44:18,500 --> 00:44:20,800
zone. 
So then you become a person that

906
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:22,500
feels like they can step out of 
their comfort zone. 

907
00:44:22,500 --> 00:44:24,500
And I think that's really, 
really important. 

908
00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:27,900
Number for, lastly here on this 
little section before we get 

909
00:44:27,900 --> 00:44:30,000
into our last section, and then,
we're Out of here, guys. 

910
00:44:30,300 --> 00:44:33,800
What a lack of discipline that 
can cause is feeling anger, or 

911
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:37,400
anxiety towards yourself, 
knowing that, you hold more 

912
00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:40,500
value than what you're currently
giving at the moment. 

913
00:44:40,500 --> 00:44:44,000
And again, this is a really 
frustrating feeling like this 

914
00:44:44,200 --> 00:44:46,400
anxiety. 
This anger of like, oh my God, I

915
00:44:46,408 --> 00:44:49,400
should be doing more, I should 
be, you know, I look at these 

916
00:44:49,400 --> 00:44:51,500
people around me, it even brings
you into comparison. 

917
00:44:51,500 --> 00:44:53,100
A lot of the time which I've 
kind of missed. 

918
00:44:53,100 --> 00:44:56,100
Actually, in this section, is 
comparisons a big one. 

919
00:44:56,100 --> 00:44:59,000
It can make you feel like walk 
like what am I doing? 

920
00:44:59,100 --> 00:45:01,100
This person is doing this. 
This is this and although I 

921
00:45:01,107 --> 00:45:02,500
don't think we should compare 
ourselves. 

922
00:45:02,500 --> 00:45:05,000
I do think we can also use 
others to motivate us. 

923
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,500
Like, if you have a friend in 
your life, who is like really 

924
00:45:07,500 --> 00:45:12,200
good, you know, getting XYZ out 
every week or waking up at a 

925
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:14,800
certain time or staying 
motivated in the gym. 

926
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:17,300
And, you know, it's not like 
they talked about going to the 

927
00:45:17,300 --> 00:45:19,400
gym all the time. 
They just they go all the time 

928
00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:21,800
and, you know, that they're like
a part of say, like a running 

929
00:45:21,800 --> 00:45:24,700
club or something, they're just 
in it because they just believe.

930
00:45:24,700 --> 00:45:27,200
Oh, I am someone that runs, you 
know, I'm a runner. 

931
00:45:27,300 --> 00:45:29,000
It's not oh I'm trying to get 
myself. 

932
00:45:29,100 --> 00:45:31,300
The phone runs its I'm a runner 
or I'm someone who goes to the 

933
00:45:31,300 --> 00:45:32,900
gym or I'm someone who wakes up 
early. 

934
00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:35,700
They like taking it into their 
lifestyle, like feed off of that

935
00:45:35,700 --> 00:45:39,000
person and be a part of that 
person's life, like be around 

936
00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:42,200
people that motivate you. 
And yeah, if you aren't feeling 

937
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:44,100
that if you aren't feeling 
motivated, if you are feeling 

938
00:45:44,100 --> 00:45:46,500
like Angry towards yourself or 
anxiety towards yourself or 

939
00:45:46,500 --> 00:45:49,600
feeling like you're too far, 
gone just know that you are not 

940
00:45:49,900 --> 00:45:52,900
and that it's just going to take
little things along the way to 

941
00:45:52,900 --> 00:45:55,000
help you. 
Last but not least. 

942
00:45:55,000 --> 00:45:58,000
This is my last little section. 
I want to give you guys is what 

943
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:01,800
having Flynn gives you. 
This is the gift that you are 

944
00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:03,100
giving to yourself. 
Are you ready? 

945
00:46:03,100 --> 00:46:06,800
This is why we're here today. 
It gives you self confidence, it

946
00:46:06,800 --> 00:46:09,900
helps you to step into being 
this version of yourself, that 

947
00:46:09,900 --> 00:46:14,200
feels like you are able to do 
the things you want and that is 

948
00:46:14,500 --> 00:46:16,500
powerful. 
That is the energy. 

949
00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:19,700
You want to be working out of it
gives you the sense of self 

950
00:46:19,700 --> 00:46:21,600
trust, which I think is 
beautiful. 

951
00:46:21,600 --> 00:46:25,600
And so, so, so important, this 
feeling that like, you genuinely

952
00:46:25,600 --> 00:46:28,100
trust that if you want 
something, you're going to go 

953
00:46:28,100 --> 00:46:30,400
after it. 
It gives you self love like I 

954
00:46:30,408 --> 00:46:32,700
mentioned many times in this 
episode, it gives you self 

955
00:46:32,700 --> 00:46:36,700
respect, which is roof. 
That one's a big one that you 

956
00:46:36,700 --> 00:46:40,700
might not realize how important 
this one is at certain points of

957
00:46:40,707 --> 00:46:42,000
your life. 
You're like, oh, whatever. 

958
00:46:42,000 --> 00:46:43,900
You know, I'll just I'll just go
out tonight. 

959
00:46:43,900 --> 00:46:46,000
Even though I said I wasn't 
going to her all, you know, I 

960
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:48,500
deserve the drink or I Deserve 
The Vape. 

961
00:46:48,500 --> 00:46:51,600
I deserve the whatever you know,
and you kind of throw it off. 

962
00:46:51,800 --> 00:46:54,100
But the moment you start to 
actually crack down and say like

963
00:46:54,100 --> 00:46:56,800
no like it's not that oh I 
deserve the drink. 

964
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:59,900
Its I deserve to stay motivated 
on the That I said I was going 

965
00:46:59,900 --> 00:47:02,600
to do and if you know for you 
that's not drinking this month 

966
00:47:02,600 --> 00:47:06,300
or this week or whatever then 
you know it actually helps you 

967
00:47:06,300 --> 00:47:08,500
to not have that drink because 
then you go. 

968
00:47:08,500 --> 00:47:12,000
Fuck yeah I respect myself and 
you feel better about yourself. 

969
00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:15,400
That then means that you expect 
other people to respect you the 

970
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:18,500
way that you respect you. 
If people like if you don't 

971
00:47:18,500 --> 00:47:20,800
respect yourself and people are 
not going to fucking respect 

972
00:47:20,800 --> 00:47:23,900
you, they're not you know but if
you have a genuine sense of 

973
00:47:23,900 --> 00:47:27,000
respect within yourself, you 
don't take shit and that's 

974
00:47:27,000 --> 00:47:28,900
powerful. 
It's something. 

975
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:31,400
That you build. 
When you practice discipline 

976
00:47:31,400 --> 00:47:34,800
again, like I said earlier, it's
this sense of building its this 

977
00:47:34,800 --> 00:47:38,400
building into yourself in 
creating this understanding of 

978
00:47:38,408 --> 00:47:42,800
yourself that pulled so much 
value that you just don't do 

979
00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:44,000
things that don't align with 
you. 

980
00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:46,800
You know, you don't go to that 
friend, hang out with like 

981
00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:50,300
people that you just don't want 
to be around, you know, you 

982
00:47:50,300 --> 00:47:52,600
aren't someone who just goes 
with the flow and does whatever 

983
00:47:52,600 --> 00:47:56,100
anyone else is doing, you make 
choices on what you think is 

984
00:47:56,100 --> 00:47:59,000
going to be valuable or not 
valuable for you, you get this. 

985
00:47:59,100 --> 00:48:02,700
Sense of control in your life 
and not in a way that you are 

986
00:48:02,700 --> 00:48:04,700
literally controlling everything
that you do. 

987
00:48:04,700 --> 00:48:07,500
Because I think so much of life 
is not something that we control

988
00:48:07,500 --> 00:48:10,800
and something that we need to 
leave up to whether we want to 

989
00:48:10,808 --> 00:48:14,300
call it fate, or the universe, 
or God, or whatever you believe.

990
00:48:14,300 --> 00:48:17,500
I do think there's an element of
like, well, I have to just trust

991
00:48:17,500 --> 00:48:21,000
that I'm doing well, so far. 
And I'm going to keep doing 

992
00:48:21,000 --> 00:48:24,300
well. 
But when you have this control 

993
00:48:24,300 --> 00:48:27,200
over your day-to-day things, and
you believe that you have that 

994
00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:30,500
control, you know, you know, 
Know that you pushing yourself 

995
00:48:30,500 --> 00:48:34,100
and going forward and showing up
for yourself is going to result 

996
00:48:34,100 --> 00:48:37,700
in like results for yourself. 
Then that's really powerful and 

997
00:48:37,700 --> 00:48:41,400
really beautiful and it's like 
that is Magic and I want you to 

998
00:48:41,400 --> 00:48:44,800
learn how to work out of this 
place of, I am powerful. 

999
00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:46,400
I am strong. 
I'm incredible. 

1000
00:48:46,400 --> 00:48:50,600
I can do so much and to 
genuinely, like not be shocked 

1001
00:48:50,600 --> 00:48:53,000
when good things come your way, 
because you're like, yeah, bro, 

1002
00:48:53,000 --> 00:48:55,400
that's just me. 
It's like lucky girl syndrome. 

1003
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:57,700
If you've heard people talk 
about that, that is so 

1004
00:48:57,700 --> 00:49:00,200
important. 
Some people call it just like 

1005
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:02,500
being delusional. 
I fucking love that. 

1006
00:49:02,500 --> 00:49:04,800
I have been like that for a long
time. 

1007
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:07,800
For as long as I can remember, I
just believe that things are 

1008
00:49:07,800 --> 00:49:09,400
going to come to me. 
I believe that good things are 

1009
00:49:09,400 --> 00:49:11,600
going to come to me. 
I believe that I deserve to have

1010
00:49:11,600 --> 00:49:13,600
opportunities. 
I believe that I would be a 

1011
00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:17,400
great person to do XYZ. 
Like, I just, you have to stand 

1012
00:49:17,400 --> 00:49:19,700
for yourself. 
You have to believe in yourself 

1013
00:49:20,000 --> 00:49:23,200
and it isn't easy. 
It isn't an overnight shift. 

1014
00:49:23,200 --> 00:49:25,700
You know, you can feel may be 
motivated after listening to 

1015
00:49:25,700 --> 00:49:28,100
this episode and I love when you
guys message me by the way and 

1016
00:49:28,100 --> 00:49:30,500
say like, oh my God, God I feel 
like I can take on like 

1017
00:49:30,500 --> 00:49:33,200
whatever, like it's so sweet. 
And I love that for you but I 

1018
00:49:33,200 --> 00:49:35,600
don't want that to fade. 
I don't want you to just feel 

1019
00:49:36,100 --> 00:49:38,700
suddenly confident because you 
know, you've listened to a TED 

1020
00:49:38,700 --> 00:49:41,700
talk or whatever you want to be 
like, okay, fuck, yeah, let's 

1021
00:49:41,700 --> 00:49:44,700
go, let's put this into action 
and let's do this. 

1022
00:49:44,700 --> 00:49:47,700
So again, I would encourage you 
if you didn't do it in today's 

1023
00:49:47,700 --> 00:49:49,700
episode to go through those 
points. 

1024
00:49:49,700 --> 00:49:54,500
Number one, figure out what you 
want number to set goals and 

1025
00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:56,500
intentions around the things 
that you want. 

1026
00:49:56,500 --> 00:49:59,700
And then number three find that 
balance between Pushing yourself

1027
00:49:59,700 --> 00:50:03,800
and listening to your body and 
when you actually need rest, go 

1028
00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:08,400
ahead do those things and know 
that you are powerful and you 

1029
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:10,400
can fucking do anything, you 
want to do. 

1030
00:50:10,400 --> 00:50:13,200
If you have that motivation 
behind you that energy behind 

1031
00:50:13,200 --> 00:50:15,900
you, you're working in the flow 
with how your body wants to 

1032
00:50:15,900 --> 00:50:17,900
work. 
And the people around you in the

1033
00:50:17,900 --> 00:50:20,400
energy is working like I just 
love it. 

1034
00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:23,000
I think it's so valuable and so 
important to just get into that 

1035
00:50:23,000 --> 00:50:25,200
flow. 
So that's today's episode guys. 

1036
00:50:25,200 --> 00:50:28,700
I hope you didn't mind me. 
Just talking shit and just going

1037
00:50:28,700 --> 00:50:30,700
off. 
Because that's just like, that's

1038
00:50:30,700 --> 00:50:33,000
why I need to do this week, you 
know, I think next week, I'm 

1039
00:50:33,000 --> 00:50:37,100
going to talk about thanking to 
call it like a, my bisexual 

1040
00:50:37,100 --> 00:50:41,200
enough, because so many of you 
are by bro, like, just come out 

1041
00:50:41,200 --> 00:50:42,900
already. 
So many of you guys message me 

1042
00:50:42,900 --> 00:50:44,800
all the time and you're like I 
think I like women. 

1043
00:50:44,800 --> 00:50:48,500
I'm like yeah bro you do like 
you like I had sex with a woman 

1044
00:50:48,500 --> 00:50:51,500
this one time and like I really 
liked it and you know, I think. 

1045
00:50:51,500 --> 00:50:54,300
But I'm like, bro. 
Like you're not straight like 

1046
00:50:54,300 --> 00:50:56,000
what do you mean? 
Anyways, so I think you can make

1047
00:50:56,000 --> 00:50:58,300
an episode about that next week 
or at least within the next few 

1048
00:50:58,300 --> 00:51:00,600
weeks. 
Video, podcasts are coming very 

1049
00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:02,000
soon. 
I'm so excited. 

1050
00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:04,000
I'm like making my set and 
everything. 

1051
00:51:04,000 --> 00:51:06,700
I know I said that last week as 
well but it's coming in February

1052
00:51:06,700 --> 00:51:09,600
so I promise that. 
Yeah, it's really exciting and 

1053
00:51:09,600 --> 00:51:11,700
you guys can be able to view 
them on YouTube as well. 

1054
00:51:11,700 --> 00:51:14,600
So that's going to be amazing. 
And if you guys don't follow the

1055
00:51:14,600 --> 00:51:18,400
podcast on Spotify or a baba gas
or wherever you listen, then, 

1056
00:51:18,400 --> 00:51:21,600
please go ahead and do that. 
It helps me and I would love 

1057
00:51:21,600 --> 00:51:24,600
that and I'm on Instagram. 
I'm on Tick Tock. 

1058
00:51:24,600 --> 00:51:27,000
Alyssa tell her Harper, which I 
always link below for you. 

1059
00:51:27,000 --> 00:51:29,800
And we also have a Facebook 
group Whoop, if you aren't on 

1060
00:51:29,800 --> 00:51:31,600
the Facebook group, what are you
doing? 

1061
00:51:31,600 --> 00:51:34,100
Come on, come hang out. 
It's a great time. 

1062
00:51:34,100 --> 00:51:36,100
So that's us. 
Thank you so much for listening 

1063
00:51:36,100 --> 00:51:38,800
and I'll see you guys next 
week's episode. 

1064
00:51:39,300 --> 00:51:40,500
Okay, bye. 
Love you. 

1065
00:51:40,500 --> 00:51:29,800
You're the best. 
Whoop, if you aren't on the 

1066
00:51:29,808 --> 00:51:31,600
Facebook group, what are you 
doing? 

1067
00:51:31,600 --> 00:51:34,100
Come on, come hang out. 
It's a great time. 

1068
00:51:34,100 --> 00:51:36,100
So that's us. 
Thank you so much for listening 

1069
00:51:36,100 --> 00:51:38,800
and I'll see you guys next 
week's episode. 

1070
00:51:39,300 --> 00:51:40,500
Okay, bye. 
Love you. 

1071
00:51:40,500 --> 00:51:40,800
You're the best.