1 00:00:01,100 --> 00:00:03,800 You're listening to. She said what with your host 2 00:00:03,800 --> 00:00:06,700 Alyssa Harper? Hello, sexy people and welcome 3 00:00:06,700 --> 00:00:08,800 back to. She said, what if you've not 4 00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:10,400 been here before then I just want to welcome you. 5 00:00:10,400 --> 00:00:14,000 And let you know that this is a space for you to come and grow 6 00:00:14,000 --> 00:00:15,700 and become the best version of yourself. 7 00:00:15,700 --> 00:00:19,800 Whether we re talking about sex and sexuality or relationships 8 00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:23,600 or self growth in general. I just want to welcome you to 9 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:27,100 this space and let you know that this is a safe inclusive space 10 00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:29,400 for anybody. And so today, we're going to be 11 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:32,400 talking about About how to be confident, how to hello, how to 12 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:35,600 become confident in your sexual self. 13 00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:39,100 This isn't to say that your sexual self is something that is 14 00:00:39,100 --> 00:00:41,600 separate to you. Obviously, you are an 15 00:00:41,600 --> 00:00:46,600 all-encompassing beautiful human being and there's a lot to you. 16 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:49,800 But this is to talk specifically about the side of us that is of 17 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:53,000 course sexual. And whether you have a whole 18 00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:57,100 bunch of experience in this space or you have literally 19 00:00:57,100 --> 00:01:01,000 never even you know, looks down there this That is for you or 20 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:03,700 going to be going through a really great practice that has 21 00:01:03,700 --> 00:01:06,700 personally helped me become closer to my sexual assault and 22 00:01:06,700 --> 00:01:10,600 to grow that intimacy with myself but that I've also done 23 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,200 with other people and walked them through and talk to them 24 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:15,100 through. And I think it's such a valuable 25 00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:18,300 practice and we're just going to be talking about all of that 26 00:01:18,300 --> 00:01:19,900 today. So I'm really excited for 27 00:01:19,900 --> 00:01:23,000 today's episode because I've had a lot of questions around this 28 00:01:23,000 --> 00:01:25,200 topic. I've had a lot of really great 29 00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:29,400 chats in my DMs with you guys about this topic, and I think 30 00:01:29,400 --> 00:01:32,000 it's just time. Time to bring it into a full-on 31 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,400 episode. So let's get into it. 32 00:01:39,500 --> 00:01:44,000 Update on my week, as per usual, I've been working, I've been 33 00:01:44,000 --> 00:01:46,900 feeling really motivated this past week, actually specifically 34 00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:50,400 with the podcast and with like content and everything that I've 35 00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:54,700 been doing, I've just been really like grateful for the 36 00:01:54,700 --> 00:01:58,100 community that I have, that have been listening and I've just 37 00:01:58,100 --> 00:02:00,800 been feeling like really, really It'd be doing what I'm doing, 38 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:05,400 which is nice because like, in any thing that you do, it's easy 39 00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:08,500 to like go through Seasons with it and to have times when you 40 00:02:08,500 --> 00:02:10,800 don't really feel the best about yourself, you don't feel like 41 00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:13,100 you're, you know, again, imposter syndrome maybe don't 42 00:02:13,100 --> 00:02:15,600 feel as good as you wish you felt about the things that you 43 00:02:15,608 --> 00:02:17,300 were doing. And this past week, I feel like 44 00:02:17,300 --> 00:02:19,900 I've kind of had a bit of a comeback and I'm feeling really 45 00:02:19,900 --> 00:02:23,300 motivated and really excited for the rest of this year. 46 00:02:23,300 --> 00:02:26,200 Can you guys believe that? It's almost June already, which 47 00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:29,000 means that we are almost halfway through 2023? 48 00:02:29,000 --> 00:02:31,200 What the fuck? I feel like that shit went by so 49 00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:34,400 fast. So I'm just kind of like looking 50 00:02:34,400 --> 00:02:38,100 at my goals that I said at the start of the year and getting 51 00:02:38,100 --> 00:02:41,000 like halfway through the year and kind of going back and 52 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:44,600 trying to figure out if you know I am where I want to be and if 53 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:47,100 I'm not then let's figure out how we're going to get there. 54 00:02:47,100 --> 00:02:48,700 And so it's just been a really nice. 55 00:02:48,700 --> 00:02:53,600 Like grounding week for me, the Japanese house just came out 56 00:02:53,600 --> 00:02:58,100 with new music, which is my favorite band ever, or they are 57 00:02:58,108 --> 00:03:02,300 my favorite artist ever. And so that's been like a dream 58 00:03:02,300 --> 00:03:03,600 for me. And I've just been really, 59 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:07,600 really loving music this week and that's basically it. 60 00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:11,600 I've been writing a lot writing a lot four episodes and working 61 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:13,100 on my website and doing all the things. 62 00:03:13,300 --> 00:03:16,500 And so, it's been fun. I want to get right into today's 63 00:03:16,500 --> 00:03:20,300 episode because like I said, earlier, this is a topic that I 64 00:03:20,300 --> 00:03:24,400 have talked with you guys about. So, so so much and so many 65 00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:26,500 people reach out to me and say like, okay, you know, I really 66 00:03:26,500 --> 00:03:29,200 want to have an orgasm, but I don't know if I've had one or I 67 00:03:29,200 --> 00:03:33,500 really To get comfortable with self-pleasure also known as 68 00:03:33,500 --> 00:03:36,000 masturbation. Like, I want to get more 69 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,200 comfortable with self-pleasure, but I just I've never done that 70 00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:40,800 and I don't feel comfortable and I was shamed about it, like, you 71 00:03:40,800 --> 00:03:42,000 know, growing up and all of that. 72 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:45,600 And so everyone has their own history and everyone has their 73 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,900 own story that they bring to this conversation. 74 00:03:47,900 --> 00:03:52,400 And so, I just want you to first and foremost acknowledge that 75 00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:55,400 you are not alone, no matter what your experience is, like, 76 00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:58,200 whether you have had lots and lots of sex and you're very 77 00:03:58,208 --> 00:04:01,700 confident in, you just want to grow even Or to your sexual 78 00:04:01,700 --> 00:04:04,300 self, then amazing. But if you have not done 79 00:04:04,300 --> 00:04:07,100 anything like this before and this is actually pretty uncomfy 80 00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:09,800 for you. I encourage you to listen all 81 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:13,600 the way through and see how this is going to help you to develop 82 00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:16,500 an open up in your relationship with yourself. 83 00:04:17,300 --> 00:04:20,800 I'm making this episode because first of all, you deserve 84 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:26,300 pleasure, you do like your body has systems that are meant to 85 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:29,700 work in line with pleasure and it is good for you. 86 00:04:29,900 --> 00:04:33,700 Which I'll get into a little bit later, but pleasure is something 87 00:04:33,700 --> 00:04:36,400 that you deserve to enjoy. And if anyone's ever made, you 88 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:39,500 feel like pleasure should not be a priority in your life. 89 00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:43,600 Let's rewire that and debris work that because you do deserve 90 00:04:43,600 --> 00:04:48,200 pleasure. This is also the foundation of 91 00:04:48,300 --> 00:04:51,200 all of your sexual relationships that you might have in your 92 00:04:51,200 --> 00:04:53,300 life. So your relationship with 93 00:04:53,300 --> 00:04:56,000 yourself, the way they're able to connect with yourself the way 94 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:59,800 they're able to sit in that like sexual energetic space. 95 00:04:59,900 --> 00:05:05,100 If you will, that's a really important to own in yourself 96 00:05:05,100 --> 00:05:08,400 because it makes it so much easier when you have other 97 00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:11,400 sexual relationships with other people, when it comes to 98 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:15,600 communicating, what you want, or how you want things to be done, 99 00:05:15,600 --> 00:05:18,100 or how you want to feel, or what's going to turn you on, and 100 00:05:18,100 --> 00:05:19,900 what's going to turn you off. And knowing all those things 101 00:05:19,900 --> 00:05:23,900 about yourself is so incredibly empowering and again that 102 00:05:23,900 --> 00:05:29,500 Foundation, lastly I feel like it, just grows yourself love and 103 00:05:29,900 --> 00:05:34,900 If acceptance shame is such a big issue especially with women, 104 00:05:35,100 --> 00:05:39,700 obviously with everybody and we don't live in a society that is 105 00:05:39,900 --> 00:05:43,300 super freeing when it comes to sex and sexuality. 106 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:47,200 And so I think it's really important that we do that for 107 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:50,500 ourselves because we deserve to feel confident in our sexual 108 00:05:50,500 --> 00:05:54,400 selves and to feel all that love feel all that self-acceptance. 109 00:05:54,500 --> 00:05:56,800 So that's why I'm doing today's episode. 110 00:05:57,100 --> 00:05:59,700 I'm going to start off with something that I read this week. 111 00:05:59,900 --> 00:06:02,800 That was like really hit me and I was like, wow, I can't believe 112 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:07,400 this, it's reported, it's been reported, that nearly one in 113 00:06:07,400 --> 00:06:09,700 seven. Women have never masturbated in 114 00:06:09,700 --> 00:06:15,400 their lifetime while 95% of men have reported masturbating, 115 00:06:15,900 --> 00:06:18,700 isn't that crazy? One in 71 in seven? 116 00:06:18,700 --> 00:06:21,800 That's a lot of women. That's a lot, a lot, a lot of 117 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:27,000 women who have never ever ever done anything, sexual with 118 00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:31,900 themselves, and to me, Me I'm like, oh, that makes me so sad 119 00:06:31,900 --> 00:06:35,600 because I know that it's such a fruitful part of somebody's life 120 00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:38,100 in can be such a fruitful part of somebody's life and like, 121 00:06:38,600 --> 00:06:43,000 brings so many beautiful experiences and really help to 122 00:06:43,000 --> 00:06:44,600 like grow that relationship with yourself. 123 00:06:44,600 --> 00:06:46,000 But that's why we're doing this today. 124 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:48,900 And again, this is just to reiterate that you are not in 125 00:06:48,900 --> 00:06:50,300 this alone. If this is something that you 126 00:06:50,300 --> 00:06:54,800 are not super comfy with orgasms in general, which are not 127 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:58,800 necessarily the goal of sex or the goal of self-pleasure. 128 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:03,300 But Orgasms have amazing benefits, amazing health 129 00:07:03,300 --> 00:07:05,400 benefits. And I actually met a tick talk 130 00:07:05,400 --> 00:07:07,900 about this, like, a year ago or so. 131 00:07:07,900 --> 00:07:10,800 And it's I think it's actually my biggest Tick-Tock because I 132 00:07:10,808 --> 00:07:15,100 go on and I talk all about the different benefits that you get 133 00:07:15,100 --> 00:07:18,900 from orgasms and people love talking about sex. 134 00:07:19,200 --> 00:07:23,700 And I just got so many people being like, wow, I had no idea, 135 00:07:23,700 --> 00:07:26,000 you know, why aren't we taught this in school? 136 00:07:26,300 --> 00:07:29,200 Why are we, if anything made to feel shame about this one we're 137 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:32,800 taught about It and that's why we go through this on learning 138 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:34,000 process. I'm just going to list some of 139 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:37,700 the things really quickly that are benefits of having orgasms. 140 00:07:37,700 --> 00:07:43,100 So first of all, it increases your dopamine which is that good 141 00:07:43,100 --> 00:07:46,400 feel hormone, it's usually going to be more short-term. 142 00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:49,000 It's that Rush of good, feels type of vibe. 143 00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:54,100 It also increases serotonin, which is your long-term, happy 144 00:07:54,100 --> 00:07:56,700 hormone if you will. So that's going to be the one 145 00:07:56,700 --> 00:07:59,700 that's going to keep you more consistently feeling, good. 146 00:08:00,800 --> 00:08:04,800 It also boosts oxytocin which is your bonding hormone. 147 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:08,300 So when you're with a partner and you have an orgasm, or 148 00:08:08,500 --> 00:08:10,700 sometimes you don't even have to have an orgasm, you can just be 149 00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:15,600 in a sexual space with a person. Oxytocin is released and that is 150 00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:18,500 what causes you to feel a bond with somebody. 151 00:08:18,500 --> 00:08:23,400 So if you know, just squashing any kind of like oh is this 152 00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:25,600 true? Is this not true when you're 153 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:28,900 like oh but yeah sex makes it real with somebody or like Sexes 154 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:31,400 what makes We attached to somebody and that's why I don't 155 00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:33,299 wanna have sex until later on in the relationship and Bubba. 156 00:08:33,308 --> 00:08:34,900 Bubba, blah, that's totally fine. 157 00:08:34,900 --> 00:08:39,799 Because scientifically there is like, obviously something that 158 00:08:39,799 --> 00:08:42,600 says, you know, oxytocin is released in that does create a 159 00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:44,600 bond between you and that person. 160 00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:47,700 It's totally up to you, how you go about that. 161 00:08:47,700 --> 00:08:50,300 But that is valuable information because when I was younger, I 162 00:08:50,300 --> 00:08:52,900 didn't know that. I always just thought like all 163 00:08:52,900 --> 00:08:55,600 like, you know, sex is bad. And if I have sex with somebody 164 00:08:55,700 --> 00:08:58,100 and then I really miss them, it's like, God punishing me 165 00:08:58,100 --> 00:09:01,200 because I shouldn't have Tax, which is just me. 166 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:03,400 I don't know if that's relatable but that's how my brain thought 167 00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:06,600 about it. Now that I understand why sex is 168 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:10,700 so bonding it actually empowers me to make better choices, which 169 00:09:10,700 --> 00:09:13,700 is how it fucking should be, but we don't learn this shit. 170 00:09:13,700 --> 00:09:19,700 So, whatever it also orgasms also flush out cortisol which is 171 00:09:19,700 --> 00:09:22,200 your stress hormone. So, not only does it make you 172 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:26,900 feel amazing, short term gives you long-lasting, happiness 173 00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:31,100 benefits, if you will? It be Bonds you to the person 174 00:09:31,100 --> 00:09:33,900 that you're with, or I should have mentioned this before with 175 00:09:33,900 --> 00:09:36,600 your self, which is the cool fucking part about all of this 176 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:39,900 is, that's where some of that like self-love self-acceptance 177 00:09:41,300 --> 00:09:43,900 comes in because you feel that bonding hormone, and it 178 00:09:43,900 --> 00:09:45,800 genuinely helps you connect to yourself. 179 00:09:45,900 --> 00:09:47,600 Love that shit, love that for us. 180 00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:51,300 It does all of that. And it reduces your stress 181 00:09:51,300 --> 00:09:54,200 hormone. So amazing, amazing amazing for 182 00:09:54,300 --> 00:09:57,200 your mental health. And obviously, our mental health 183 00:09:57,200 --> 00:10:00,700 ties so much into our physical health, and It's just so 184 00:10:00,700 --> 00:10:04,600 beautiful and so amazing. And on top of that separate to 185 00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:06,700 your mental health, just affecting your physical health, 186 00:10:06,700 --> 00:10:09,500 it actually strengthens your immune system. 187 00:10:09,500 --> 00:10:12,700 So you're not going to get sick and shit as much which we 188 00:10:12,700 --> 00:10:15,300 fucking love it. Also helps you to regulate your 189 00:10:15,300 --> 00:10:19,100 hormones, which helps you to have more regular periods, and 190 00:10:19,100 --> 00:10:22,600 easier periods. So less symptoms throughout your 191 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:26,200 period, like headaches and cramps and, you know, all the 192 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:32,100 things and a little Pro tip. Here is the best way to get all 193 00:10:32,100 --> 00:10:34,300 of these benefits. And of course, I'll link 194 00:10:34,300 --> 00:10:37,700 resources and all of this below. So you guys can verify these 195 00:10:37,700 --> 00:10:40,000 things and read on further if you want to do that. 196 00:10:40,800 --> 00:10:45,900 But a way to really get all of those benefits is to stay in the 197 00:10:45,900 --> 00:10:49,900 orgasmic Plateau phase for as long as possible. 198 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:54,100 This is also known as edging. If you've heard of that which 199 00:10:54,100 --> 00:10:57,200 basically just means that you're pushing back your orgasm for as 200 00:10:57,200 --> 00:10:59,600 long as you can. And yeah. 201 00:10:59,800 --> 00:11:05,500 Spending more time in that phase of orgasm before, you have that 202 00:11:05,500 --> 00:11:08,800 release in that proper, you know, full-on orgasm feeling. 203 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:11,600 And so, that's a way that you can really, really get all of 204 00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:14,600 the benefits. Now, now, that you have a little 205 00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:17,300 bit of information, you got some time, you've been warmed up a 206 00:11:17,308 --> 00:11:19,300 little bit, you know, I've had some time to think about the the 207 00:11:19,500 --> 00:11:24,100 subject we're going to reflect. We are going to talk about you. 208 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:28,000 So the goal here is to think about what your relationship 209 00:11:28,000 --> 00:11:31,000 with sex is like, Which is something that we don't do 210 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,500 enough. If anything, we try not to think 211 00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:37,400 about it or we think about those little things that we do when we 212 00:11:37,400 --> 00:11:41,600 are having self pleasure, and we think it is like gross. 213 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:44,500 Or we think it's a little bit weird or like, we're the only 214 00:11:44,500 --> 00:11:48,700 people who do certain things. I remember reading, what's it 215 00:11:48,700 --> 00:11:51,000 called? Greedy by Jen Winston, which I 216 00:11:51,008 --> 00:11:52,600 talked about all the time because I fucking love that 217 00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:55,100 book. It's all about her Journey 218 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:58,000 coming out as bisexual and just living life as bisexual, and 219 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:01,500 it's amazing, especially if you are And you are or you're just, 220 00:12:01,500 --> 00:12:04,200 you know, curious about the subject like, in, or you just 221 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:05,300 want to be something fucking funny. 222 00:12:05,400 --> 00:12:07,500 It's great. You should read her book in her 223 00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:09,700 book. She has a whole like chapter 224 00:12:09,700 --> 00:12:11,300 where she talks about how growing up. 225 00:12:11,500 --> 00:12:16,000 She used to masturbate laying on her stomach and like she looked 226 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:19,200 like a penguin just like rolling around and shit and she was like 227 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:22,300 so embarrassed by it and I just thought it was so, so so funny 228 00:12:22,300 --> 00:12:25,500 because it's so it's crazy, the things that, you know, we feel 229 00:12:25,500 --> 00:12:29,300 so shameful about, it's crazy, the things that if we knew at 230 00:12:29,300 --> 00:12:31,800 the time, Time that other people were the same. 231 00:12:31,800 --> 00:12:34,500 Or if we knew at the time, that other people felt the same way, 232 00:12:34,500 --> 00:12:38,700 like we wouldn't feel so many negative emotions, but because 233 00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:41,400 we don't get to talk about it that often we don't get to get 234 00:12:41,400 --> 00:12:43,800 that release. And so, that's what I'm hoping 235 00:12:43,800 --> 00:12:47,900 to do with this episode. Obviously why I want to do this. 236 00:12:47,900 --> 00:12:53,200 Practice is because like in any relationship you learn about the 237 00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:57,000 person, you know, you learn, you expand, you ask questions and 238 00:12:57,000 --> 00:12:57,800 that's what you're going to be doing. 239 00:12:57,800 --> 00:12:59,600 Here is asking yourself questions. 240 00:13:00,100 --> 00:13:02,900 So you can understand your sexual self better. 241 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:06,000 And again to me this is one of the most empowering things that 242 00:13:06,000 --> 00:13:09,400 you can do. Because sexual Wellness is 243 00:13:09,500 --> 00:13:13,300 Wellness, sexual self care is self-care. 244 00:13:13,500 --> 00:13:15,800 It's not this separate thing again. 245 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:21,100 You are in all-encompassing human being that has all these 246 00:13:21,100 --> 00:13:24,400 different parts of you. And we are just trying to liven 247 00:13:24,400 --> 00:13:26,500 up this specific part of you today. 248 00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:31,200 You can do this practice as Just listen to the episode and 249 00:13:31,300 --> 00:13:34,400 reflect and think as we go along, but I would actually 250 00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:38,000 challenged you to sit down eventually with a journal so you 251 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,700 can get the most out of this practice and, you know, write 252 00:13:40,700 --> 00:13:43,100 down your answers. Think it will just give you more 253 00:13:43,100 --> 00:13:47,900 space to think about these questions and yeah, let's get 254 00:13:47,900 --> 00:13:49,600 right into it. Oh my God, I'm so excited these 255 00:13:49,600 --> 00:13:51,800 things that you I'm going to bring up that you can ask 256 00:13:51,800 --> 00:13:54,400 yourself are going to be available as well. 257 00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:56,800 In the she said what Facebook group. 258 00:13:56,900 --> 00:13:58,600 I'm going to send it there for you guys so that you don't have 259 00:13:58,608 --> 00:14:01,800 to write anything now. You can relax and just listen 260 00:14:01,800 --> 00:14:07,200 along but let's go. Number one, what brings me, 261 00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:11,000 sexual pleasure. If you have an answer to that, 262 00:14:11,000 --> 00:14:13,800 if you've experienced this before, if you've had 263 00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:18,100 self-pleasure, what do you like? And I want you to be honest, I 264 00:14:18,108 --> 00:14:20,800 want you to be gritty. I want you to be specific, like 265 00:14:20,800 --> 00:14:23,200 if you are sitting on a piece of paper, right? 266 00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:26,000 And you're going to write this down, you can think of yourself 267 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:28,600 burning that after you can put it in the garbage, you can do, 268 00:14:28,600 --> 00:14:31,500 whatever if you're scared of, Someone seeing it right now, 269 00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:33,000 nobody's going to see it. And if you're doing this 270 00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:34,900 mentally, nobody's gonna hear you. 271 00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:38,000 So really, really be honest with yourself, I am talking 272 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:41,400 specifics, okay? I'm talking, do we like back and 273 00:14:41,400 --> 00:14:43,300 forth? Do we like circles? 274 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:45,400 Do we like hot? Do we like cold? 275 00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:49,800 Is there a location that we like, Are there specific like 276 00:14:49,900 --> 00:14:53,900 external things that you might use in your practice if you will 277 00:14:53,900 --> 00:14:58,300 like a toy or Lube or whatever? Is there anything that you can 278 00:14:58,300 --> 00:15:03,000 think of specifically? That brings you pleasure and 279 00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:05,900 when you ask yourself this I wanted to take some time and 280 00:15:05,900 --> 00:15:10,800 also be ready to be confronted with potential like emotions of 281 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:14,500 Shame and discomfort or embarrassment because we were 282 00:15:14,500 --> 00:15:17,500 taught to feel that way. But this is a part of you going 283 00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:22,500 through this unlearning journey and going towards empowerment, 284 00:15:23,300 --> 00:15:26,500 some of these things, of course, might change with time. 285 00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:29,500 Like, I can say that five years ago. 286 00:15:29,700 --> 00:15:34,200 I didn't like all the things that I do now, right? 287 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:37,800 Because I didn't experience it yet, or there are things that I 288 00:15:37,808 --> 00:15:42,400 did, then that I wouldn't do now because I have different. 289 00:15:43,100 --> 00:15:45,100 I don't know, I have different ways of doing things, like 290 00:15:45,100 --> 00:15:47,500 things change with time, so just know that this is something that 291 00:15:47,500 --> 00:15:49,800 you can do over and over again this doesn't have to be just 292 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:54,300 like a one and done situation. Question number two is, are 293 00:15:54,300 --> 00:15:58,600 there things that you've always wanted to try is there? 294 00:15:58,600 --> 00:16:02,700 Think about it. It and what is stopping you from 295 00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:05,700 trying them? Is it actually like a 296 00:16:05,700 --> 00:16:09,600 closed-door situation and say for example you know you need a 297 00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:11,800 partner to do that thing and right now you don't currently 298 00:16:11,800 --> 00:16:13,300 have a partner that you could try that thing with. 299 00:16:13,300 --> 00:16:15,900 So it's like okay you know, I will try that one day but with 300 00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:20,300 somebody or are these things that you want to try things that 301 00:16:20,300 --> 00:16:22,500 you could actually try. But the only thing holding you 302 00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:26,700 back, maybe, I don't know. Maybe is shame or I don't think 303 00:16:26,700 --> 00:16:29,400 I should do XYZ. Take a moment to think about 304 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:32,100 that. That question number three is, 305 00:16:32,100 --> 00:16:36,900 if I could have anything in the world, anything what does my 306 00:16:36,900 --> 00:16:43,700 sexual ideal sexual experience? Look like think about it? 307 00:16:43,900 --> 00:16:45,400 Is there anything specific that you've been? 308 00:16:45,400 --> 00:16:47,900 Like, I would love to this. I would love to be at this 309 00:16:47,900 --> 00:16:50,400 place, or I'd love to try this position. 310 00:16:50,900 --> 00:16:52,800 What do you want the mood to be? Like, what do you want the 311 00:16:52,800 --> 00:16:54,300 lighting to be? Like, what do you want? 312 00:16:54,300 --> 00:16:56,100 The think of all your senses? Right? 313 00:16:56,100 --> 00:17:00,100 The sense that the the smell, The Taste, the feel What are you 314 00:17:00,100 --> 00:17:02,300 just you want it be warmed. You want to be a little bit like 315 00:17:02,400 --> 00:17:03,500 cooler. I don't know. 316 00:17:03,500 --> 00:17:05,400 Do you want to be in a bet? You want to be on a couch? 317 00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:07,300 The only be on the floor. I don't know, you know, think 318 00:17:07,300 --> 00:17:11,800 about what your ideal ideal sexual experience would look 319 00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:14,000 like. Because again, when do we do 320 00:17:14,000 --> 00:17:17,099 this? When do we ask ourself what we 321 00:17:17,099 --> 00:17:20,400 truly want? Most of the time, especially 322 00:17:20,800 --> 00:17:26,000 women end up, feeling like they get what they get, you know, if 323 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:29,500 they don't come they don't come, it's so much more of a norm. 324 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:33,000 ERM for sex to end after the man has come. 325 00:17:33,000 --> 00:17:35,400 And again, this is very just like, I'm just saying men and 326 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:40,800 women, but know that, obviously, this can extend beyond that, but 327 00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:43,400 this is the typical Norman straight relationships. 328 00:17:43,700 --> 00:17:47,900 Is that sexist over once the man has come and there's the classic 329 00:17:47,900 --> 00:17:50,800 line of like, oh, did you come first of all? 330 00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:55,300 He should fucking know, but if he doesn't know, what is the 331 00:17:55,300 --> 00:17:57,900 response to? No, I didn't come. 332 00:17:58,200 --> 00:18:00,600 It shouldn't be like, oh maybe. Next time, right? 333 00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:02,800 It should be okay. Well let's take time with you 334 00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:06,300 right now but that's not actually the norm and I think 335 00:18:06,300 --> 00:18:08,800 it's so important that we stop and we ask ourselves. 336 00:18:08,800 --> 00:18:12,400 What do we want? Because we just serve to find 337 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:15,900 what we want and we deserve to have Partners who make us feel 338 00:18:15,900 --> 00:18:18,500 like we're allowed to ask what we want. 339 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:22,900 Next question, question number four, what are three of my 340 00:18:22,900 --> 00:18:26,000 favorite sexual experiences that I've had? 341 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:29,500 This is actually a question that I took out. 342 00:18:29,600 --> 00:18:32,000 Out of Come As You Are by Emmeline agofsky. 343 00:18:33,100 --> 00:18:37,900 This was a really challenging practice for me because I had to 344 00:18:37,900 --> 00:18:41,400 write down, you know, three of my favorite sexual experiences 345 00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:44,300 ever. And I had to be really honest 346 00:18:44,300 --> 00:18:47,000 about what made them great for me. 347 00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:50,800 What made them exciting for me? And that's the best part. 348 00:18:50,800 --> 00:18:53,500 That's the fun part. So, again, writing down three of 349 00:18:53,500 --> 00:18:58,100 your favorite sexual experiences and then of course, why you 350 00:18:58,100 --> 00:19:00,100 enjoyed them what you liked about Them. 351 00:19:00,500 --> 00:19:03,400 And then you can look at the different experiences. 352 00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:05,500 Look at what you've written down, or maybe what you've just 353 00:19:05,500 --> 00:19:09,000 thought about and find similarities. 354 00:19:09,300 --> 00:19:12,600 Because again, this is just teaching you what you like in 355 00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:15,400 sexual experiences, which is so fun and so exciting. 356 00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:20,800 Okay, next question, question number five, I want to say, 357 00:19:21,100 --> 00:19:24,500 sorry guys, I always lose track on where Malik question. 45 is. 358 00:19:24,800 --> 00:19:29,500 What are your three least favorite sexual? 359 00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:32,200 Uses exact same as what we just did, but we're going to do the 360 00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:34,900 opposite because this is also, really, really valuable 361 00:19:34,900 --> 00:19:37,600 information for you. So what are your three least 362 00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:41,000 favorite sexual experiences? This could be self-pleasure 363 00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:44,300 specifically, this could be with a particular partner, maybe 364 00:19:44,300 --> 00:19:46,200 something didn't make you feel quite, right? 365 00:19:46,300 --> 00:19:50,200 Maybe you didn't feel prioritized or, you know, it was 366 00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:52,500 really like quick or something like something specific like 367 00:19:52,500 --> 00:19:53,700 that. Where you like, oh I just didn't 368 00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:56,000 like it for this thing. Again, write down. 369 00:19:56,000 --> 00:20:01,200 Why you didn't like it and then Again, we're going to look for 370 00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:05,300 similarities because this can help us recognize. 371 00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:10,400 Oh, I actually really don't like having sex when I'm really tired 372 00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:15,700 or I, she don't like having sex with this type of person and 373 00:20:15,700 --> 00:20:19,400 it's really, really valuable part of me thinks almost a 374 00:20:19,400 --> 00:20:22,700 little bit, even more reliable, more a little bit. 375 00:20:22,700 --> 00:20:25,900 Then the last one that we did because this one is like, it 376 00:20:25,900 --> 00:20:29,300 really helps you to create a sense of like boundaries and it 377 00:20:29,600 --> 00:20:31,700 Oops, you to figure out what you don't like and sometimes if we 378 00:20:31,700 --> 00:20:34,300 struggle to figure out what we do, like if the last one was 379 00:20:34,300 --> 00:20:36,800 hard for you, it's easier to figure out what we don't like 380 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:38,100 and then fill the gaps from there. 381 00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:41,300 So maybe that's you right now by those are questions that I want 382 00:20:41,300 --> 00:20:43,000 you to specifically, ask yourself. 383 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:47,600 And when we do these practices, they remind us that our sexual 384 00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:52,000 desires are not shameful. We spend so much time, not 385 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:56,400 acknowledging it, that we can even passively build up this 386 00:20:56,400 --> 00:20:59,700 resistance to wanting things. And so, when we do, Who 387 00:20:59,700 --> 00:21:02,300 practices like this. Especially if we write it down 388 00:21:02,300 --> 00:21:05,600 especially if we like you know put it in stone like make it 389 00:21:05,600 --> 00:21:09,600 real, make it a reality. It helps to break down that Wall 390 00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:13,700 of Shame and if we can acknowledge to ourselves what we 391 00:21:13,700 --> 00:21:17,400 like, then how are we going to do that with a partner? 392 00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:20,600 You know, when you are with someone eventually and they say 393 00:21:20,600 --> 00:21:23,500 to you, oh, what do you like what do you want to try? 394 00:21:23,500 --> 00:21:26,800 What feels good for you and you don't know that can be a lot 395 00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:29,700 more stressful to do in the presence of somebody that that 396 00:21:29,700 --> 00:21:32,900 maybe you like maybe they make you nervous maybe sex in general 397 00:21:32,900 --> 00:21:35,400 makes you nervous which I think everybody it does you know, at 398 00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:39,300 least a little bit at certain points it's harder to do that 399 00:21:39,300 --> 00:21:42,600 when you don't have a bit of a hold of it, on a bit of a hold 400 00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:44,200 on. It yourself. 401 00:21:44,300 --> 00:21:47,400 And so, I definitely recommend doing that another little bonus 402 00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:51,000 thing here to help you expand on understanding who you are 403 00:21:51,000 --> 00:21:55,300 sexually and what you want and getting really honing in on that 404 00:21:55,500 --> 00:21:59,400 is to talk to your friends more about sex obviously. 405 00:21:59,600 --> 00:22:03,800 Inappropriate spaces with appropriate people that you 406 00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:06,000 trust and you know, you feel comfortable talking to about 407 00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,600 these things, talk to your friends about it because I was 408 00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,300 even in the car. One day I remember with my 409 00:22:11,300 --> 00:22:14,500 friends in high school someone made some sort of joke about 410 00:22:14,500 --> 00:22:18,600 masturbation and then one of my friends just went I masturbate 411 00:22:18,600 --> 00:22:20,700 like all the time. Is that normal? 412 00:22:20,900 --> 00:22:22,400 And then another friend went bro. 413 00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:25,100 I literally masturbate like every day like it's just like 414 00:22:25,100 --> 00:22:28,000 part of my like self-care and I was shocked. 415 00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:31,400 I was like, I was like wow. Well, I always felt like there 416 00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:33,300 was something wrong with me or I felt like there was something 417 00:22:33,300 --> 00:22:37,200 bad about how much or how much I didn't, you know, do something. 418 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,300 And it just started this whole conversation and we got into a 419 00:22:40,300 --> 00:22:45,100 whole like long-ass conversation about how we felt about it and 420 00:22:45,100 --> 00:22:47,900 why we felt kind of shit about it at times and it was really, 421 00:22:47,900 --> 00:22:51,600 really empowering. So if you do have the space or a 422 00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:54,800 friend or somebody that you really trust that you feel like 423 00:22:54,800 --> 00:22:57,400 you can talk to about it, I would really encourage you to 424 00:22:57,400 --> 00:23:01,800 talk about it one of the Thing that I used as well. 425 00:23:01,900 --> 00:23:03,700 Even recently, you guys have probably heard about this. 426 00:23:03,700 --> 00:23:06,200 If you've been following me for a little bit, now is the Elise 427 00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:10,900 app which you can go on and fill out a like little questionnaire 428 00:23:10,900 --> 00:23:15,800 situation and they tell you what, your sexual archetype is, 429 00:23:15,800 --> 00:23:18,200 which is so like so specific. But like so fun. 430 00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,000 If you're like me and you love to do a little quizzes and like, 431 00:23:21,400 --> 00:23:24,600 see stuff about your star sign and, you know, all the shit. 432 00:23:24,600 --> 00:23:26,900 It's just fun. Then you're really gonna like 433 00:23:26,900 --> 00:23:30,000 this because it tells you your sexual archetype and For me, it 434 00:23:30,000 --> 00:23:33,600 told me that I am in the Explorer, which I fucking love 435 00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:35,300 because I was like, yes, absolutely. 436 00:23:35,300 --> 00:23:38,200 That is me. And it was just really cool to 437 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:42,400 read through the descriptions of what they were saying. 438 00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:45,700 You know, I would like as the Explorer, maybe what, I wouldn't 439 00:23:45,700 --> 00:23:48,300 like, what I should look for in a partner and it was just again, 440 00:23:48,300 --> 00:23:50,900 like another way to expand my relationship with myself 441 00:23:50,900 --> 00:23:53,100 sexually. So, that was really cool. 442 00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:58,200 I think it's really empowering to look back on the journey that 443 00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:01,300 I've had with growing mine. Sexual self. 444 00:24:01,700 --> 00:24:04,900 And I just want to take the last little bit of today's podcast to 445 00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:08,000 share with you. How I kind of went through that 446 00:24:08,000 --> 00:24:12,900 Journey myself growing up, I started out like what I was 447 00:24:12,900 --> 00:24:15,800 very, very young having self-pleasure but I didn't know 448 00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:18,600 what it was, right. Nobody ever told me and I always 449 00:24:18,600 --> 00:24:21,700 felt really ashamed of it. And it was to the point that I 450 00:24:21,700 --> 00:24:24,300 used to think that it was this really bad thing that I was 451 00:24:24,300 --> 00:24:26,700 doing and nobody had like done it before. 452 00:24:26,700 --> 00:24:29,300 Like, I literally thought I was a fucking alien. 453 00:24:29,700 --> 00:24:34,900 And I had this calendar on my wall when I was little and this 454 00:24:34,900 --> 00:24:39,600 is so sad to me and I used to literally X off the days on the 455 00:24:39,608 --> 00:24:44,700 calendar that I would have self-pleasure because I was 456 00:24:44,700 --> 00:24:47,500 like, that's a bad day. This was a bad day and I would 457 00:24:47,500 --> 00:24:49,500 do like a day and then I do the next day. 458 00:24:49,500 --> 00:24:51,500 Oh my God. It like it would just happen 459 00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:54,600 enough that at one point I just got rid of the calendar and was 460 00:24:54,600 --> 00:25:00,100 like I'm fucked up and so time went on and over time Just kind 461 00:25:00,100 --> 00:25:03,000 of got over the fact that it was this bad thing. 462 00:25:03,000 --> 00:25:05,100 I don't really care. I was like, whatever, whatever. 463 00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:07,500 It's fine. I understand that. 464 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:11,300 Maybe it's not just me because that doesn't really make sense. 465 00:25:11,600 --> 00:25:14,600 Got old enough that I did see porn for the first time. 466 00:25:15,000 --> 00:25:17,700 It's almost always like an unwilling thing, you know, 467 00:25:17,700 --> 00:25:20,200 because you don't know that it's a thing until you see it. 468 00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:22,900 And then I was like, holy shit. That's like, kind of like the 469 00:25:22,900 --> 00:25:25,800 thing. And so, you know, way it was 470 00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:28,300 really helpful for me because I was like, oh, this is, like, I 471 00:25:28,300 --> 00:25:30,400 didn't understand sex. This is thing, I did not 472 00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:32,500 understand. I would, I was not told 473 00:25:32,500 --> 00:25:36,200 anything, and I would ever ask questions any time it would come 474 00:25:36,200 --> 00:25:38,200 up around my family or anything. I'd always pretend I didn't 475 00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:40,500 know, right? Like, I'd be like, he, like, I'm 476 00:25:40,500 --> 00:25:42,400 giggle along and be like, no. I don't know what that is. 477 00:25:42,500 --> 00:25:47,200 But like, I obviously did, and then as I got older, I because I 478 00:25:47,200 --> 00:25:51,400 grew up in the church, I was told that it was something that 479 00:25:51,500 --> 00:25:56,200 you shouldn't really do. I remember some people saying, 480 00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:59,700 like some church leaders and, you know, the odd person, I 481 00:25:59,700 --> 00:26:02,800 looked up to who was a Christian which vary in that world that's 482 00:26:02,800 --> 00:26:05,100 a very common thing is like having these mentors right. 483 00:26:05,400 --> 00:26:11,700 I had some people say things like it's not a good thing to 484 00:26:11,700 --> 00:26:15,000 do, it doesn't help your relationship with God. 485 00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:18,900 But if it's going to stop you from say having sex with your 486 00:26:18,900 --> 00:26:21,500 boyfriend, then it's the better alternative. 487 00:26:21,500 --> 00:26:26,300 So even though I at one point accepted that it was an okay 488 00:26:26,300 --> 00:26:31,500 thing I still thought it's like The Lesser bad of the two. 489 00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:35,600 And so that was really how I felt about it for quite a long 490 00:26:35,600 --> 00:26:39,900 time throughout a lot of high school and eventually I got to a 491 00:26:39,908 --> 00:26:42,100 point where I was like, honestly it's fine. 492 00:26:42,100 --> 00:26:43,700 I don't think this is a bad thing to me. 493 00:26:43,700 --> 00:26:46,400 It doesn't make sense that there would be this this part of my 494 00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:47,800 body. That brings me so much pleasure 495 00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,300 that I'm like apparently does not allowed to have. 496 00:26:50,300 --> 00:26:52,200 I thought, you know, that doesn't really make sense to me. 497 00:26:52,400 --> 00:26:54,000 So eventually I kind of got over that. 498 00:26:54,000 --> 00:26:59,000 But even all the way through until about three, maybe three 499 00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:02,300 or four. Years ago, I still felt a lot of 500 00:27:02,300 --> 00:27:06,400 Shame having sex at all, obviously before marriage 501 00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:09,100 because that was the whole Christian idea, right? 502 00:27:09,300 --> 00:27:14,500 And so I've had to break down a lot of Shame from starting out 503 00:27:14,500 --> 00:27:18,400 with everything is so bad. I should not do any of this to. 504 00:27:18,500 --> 00:27:21,800 Well, it's the lesser of the bad, but it's still pretty bad 505 00:27:21,900 --> 00:27:24,900 to actually, I think it's fine and I think everyone's fucking 506 00:27:24,900 --> 00:27:27,800 crazy but definitely don't have sex and now obviously I'm in a 507 00:27:27,808 --> 00:27:31,200 space where I just Believe that, as long as everybody's 508 00:27:31,200 --> 00:27:33,000 consenting, you're having a good time. 509 00:27:33,100 --> 00:27:35,500 You're enjoying yourself, you know, you're enthusiastically, 510 00:27:35,500 --> 00:27:37,900 consenting and you're experiencing pleasure. 511 00:27:37,900 --> 00:27:41,400 Then anything goes, you know, that's, that's where I'm at. 512 00:27:42,300 --> 00:27:48,400 But it's just been quite the fuckin journey and I know that 513 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:52,200 in five years time or even 10 years time, especially 10 years 514 00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:54,400 time, I'm going to look back and think. 515 00:27:54,400 --> 00:27:57,400 Wow, I was actually so close-minded right now because 516 00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:01,500 I'm consistently doing these kinds of Cactuses to continue to 517 00:28:01,500 --> 00:28:04,400 explore and open up, which is exactly what I would encourage 518 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:07,600 you to do as well. Because I can tell you firsthand 519 00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:13,200 that, it is fruitful and taking time to reflect on who you are, 520 00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:16,800 as a sexual being is actually a really beautiful Human 521 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:18,900 Experience. And I have moments even now 522 00:28:18,900 --> 00:28:23,300 where I just think like, oh my gosh, this is so insane. 523 00:28:23,300 --> 00:28:26,500 That this is our experience that we get to live in these bodies 524 00:28:26,700 --> 00:28:30,000 that can bring us so much pleasure and Yes, they can 525 00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:31,900 absolutely bring us pain. Yes, they can. 526 00:28:31,900 --> 00:28:35,200 Bring us frustration when we were not quite sure how to get 527 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:37,600 to orgasm. Or we're with a partner and we 528 00:28:37,608 --> 00:28:40,500 don't feel prioritized and we know we wish we could come 529 00:28:40,500 --> 00:28:42,200 faster and all of those things, you know. 530 00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:45,500 Yes, it can bring difficult things but the more that we work 531 00:28:45,500 --> 00:28:50,000 on listening to that empowering side and engaging with the side 532 00:28:50,000 --> 00:28:53,300 of us that's actually self accepting and loving the more 533 00:28:53,300 --> 00:28:57,500 confident, we're going to feel over time and just grow in our 534 00:28:57,500 --> 00:29:01,400 sexual selves. So That's basically it for 535 00:29:01,400 --> 00:29:03,300 today, guys. Next week, I'm going to be 536 00:29:03,300 --> 00:29:06,300 talking about how to grow a sexual relationship with a 537 00:29:06,308 --> 00:29:09,000 partner. So it's really important that 538 00:29:09,000 --> 00:29:12,700 you think about this this week or, you know, before you listen 539 00:29:12,700 --> 00:29:18,100 to next week's episode and really like have that deep 540 00:29:18,100 --> 00:29:21,400 reflection so that you have the foundation for next week. 541 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:23,100 Thank you guys so much for listening. 542 00:29:23,100 --> 00:29:26,600 If you don't already follow the podcast on Apple podcasts or 543 00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:29,000 Spotify, then please do that because that helps me. 544 00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:31,000 Plus more people to see the podcast. 545 00:29:31,400 --> 00:29:33,400 Thank you so much for sharing the podcast. 546 00:29:33,400 --> 00:29:36,500 When you guys do that on your Instagram stories and with a 547 00:29:36,500 --> 00:29:40,300 friend, and all of that again, I'm just so thankful to be doing 548 00:29:40,300 --> 00:29:44,400 this right now and I'm loving the community especially on the 549 00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:46,900 Facebook group which if you want to go get all those questions, 550 00:29:47,000 --> 00:29:49,900 please feel free to join that. The she said what podcast group 551 00:29:49,900 --> 00:29:53,500 on Facebook and I'm also on Instagram and Tick-Tock atalissa 552 00:29:53,500 --> 00:29:56,600 Taylor Harper, where you can reach out and we can talk about 553 00:29:56,600 --> 00:29:59,200 this. Please feel free to DM me on. 554 00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:02,300 Instagram and that is everything. 555 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:04,700 I love you guys so much. Thank you so much for listening 556 00:30:04,700 --> 00:30:07,300 and all the resources. Everything will be below for 557 00:30:07,300 --> 00:30:08,500 you. If you want to go read into this 558 00:30:08,500 --> 00:30:12,100 a little bit more, have a lovely day and I will see you soon. 559 00:30:12,300 --> 00:30:12,800 Bye, guys.