One thing that's a little unique about us is because we're really
mission driven. So we are really, we really want
more women to be managing more money, to be making more money,
to be using that money to employ other women, all of those things
to use that money to support their chosen political
candidate. Right.
Money is very powerful sophics. And allies you're.
Listening to queer women rising, that's women with an axe
because. We are inclusive here.
When we hear the stories of queer women who have gone before
us, we see evidence that there's nothing we can't do.
And yes, we can too. Welcome back to Queer Women
Rising. I'm your host, Sofia Spilino.
And if you are a woman, a queer woman wanting more, wanting to
make as much or scratch that more than a man, you're going to
love this episode because you're not here to play average, to
play small. You're creating a reality in
your life, in your love life, in your professional life, and
you're building your bank account.
My guest today, Jesse Gabriel, began her journey as an attorney
working at one of the country's most prestigious firms.
Like Baker has. I don't even know if I can say
it. Baker has still LED her where
she was the youngest female to launch an investment funds
practice. The youngest female.
This is huge. In 2020, Jessie left her career
in Big Law to launch All Places, a law firm for women and by
women. All Places is the culmination of
her expertise and ethos, a space for women to formulate
businesses of all kinds, receive trusted legal and strategic
guidance, and ultimately cultivate long term financial
success. I am so excited to have her on
today. This is going to be so, so good.
And if you are here live with us, feel free to ask questions
by podcast, then know that you can come in Instagram Live every
Wednesday at 12:00 PM Central Standard Time for we're women
rising and I can't wait to see live.
Oh my gosh. Hi, Jesse, How are you?
Hi, Cynthia, I'm good. I'm so glad to have you.
I'm so excited to always bring women on who have done great
things and so we can look at them and say, oh wait, she can
do that, it's possible for me. Or oh, how she helps people.
It's possible for me. So I can't wait to hear your
story. I'm so happy to be here.
Yeah. OK.
So I'm talking about. This stuff and yeah, I'm so
excited to talk to you and following you since hearing
about the podcast. And so just, you know, excited
Instagram line, but definitely not my space.
So I'm a little nervous. Oh my gosh, don't.
Be nervous, but also happy to be here.
First of all, you're quite lovely and the lesbians are
going to be so happy to see your face so so know that they're to
make. Me feel comfortable.
Thank you. Yes.
And then secondly, I always ask my guests before we start, are
you queer? What does that look like for
you? Are you an ally?
I am not queer, I am an ally. Amazing.
Well, I'm so glad to have you here and thank.
You for having me on a show focused on queer women and
bringing allies on and just great.
Thank you for the inclusivity. I think it's always so important
on both sides. Yes, it really is.
It really is. And I'm so excited to see when
we do have people in powerful places who have accomplished
great things and they say like I, I'm want to be out and proud
as an ally because we know about sometimes in the world people
don't like that and that can affect you.
So you standing up for us means the world.
So thank you for your inclusivity as well.
And I'm, I'm curious like you started in such a male dominated
industry, what was that like day-to-day?
I mean, you can probably guess, right?
And this is such an interesting, it's such an interesting
question that evolves over time, right?
When I started as a lawyer, I was a baby, right?
I was 27, and the concept of, you know, gender discrimination
or being treated differently or any limitation on my
possibility, on my expansion didn't even occur to me.
You know, I grew up thinking I could do anything.
I was raised by a single mother and she always, I don't know, I
just learned from her that I could do anything.
And so I didn't think about the dynamic that much until I got
more senior in my career. And then you start looking
around and you're like, oh, there aren't that many women
making decisions at this place. And then you become a senior
person and felt like I still wasn't didn't really have the
power to make decisions even though I was a partner.
And yeah, I mean, there were some things that some of my best
mentors were men. So some parts of it were great,
but a lot of parts were, you know, were really challenging.
And I think it definitely falls in that bucket of industries
where there's so much room to make it better and more
inclusive. And when you make it more
inclusive, it's better because you have top talent who want to
stay and do the work with you. Yeah, I, I have dated people in
like the legal industry and obviously they're queer and they
say, like in those male dominated fields, they have to
actually have moments where no matter how out and proud they
are, they pretended to be straight.
And like, that's like, whoa. But I guess it's just part of
the reality that you guys face in those industries.
I think that that's, I mean, I'm not surprised to hear that at
all. I mean, it's, I think whatever
qualities you have that deviate from the majority of people who
are in the industry, you feel some need or not, you know, not
need. Some people work against it more
than others. But for me, I felt the need just
to downplay my femininity because I didn't want people
like looking at my tits, right? I didn't want people, which was
definitely a thing that would happen.
Yeah, yeah, I, I absolutely get that.
Like, you want to be respected for your brain and what you
bring to the table. Well, you took the leap of faith
from that stable career, even though it wasn't always great,
it was extremely stable. And starting a venture capital
fund seems like a huge leap. In fact, Like, can you just
define what that is for our audience?
Because maybe they don't know what is a venture capital fund.
Yeah. And I will define that and I'll
clarify that I am still a lawyer.
I run a law firm and we work with venture capital funds and
we work with venture backed startups.
OK, thank you. I'm sorry I mixed that up.
No, I'm not gonna. Help.
I can answer all your venture capital questions.
OK, so. OK, so you're helping venture,
you're helping people raise money though, or you're helping
venture capitalists? So I am if you are a woman, we
work with some men too. And you want to start a venture,
friend, what you would do is you would come to us and we work
with you on setting up the structure.
And then we do all the legal support around you, start making
investments, right? You're doing deals, you're on
corporate boards. And so we provide all your
typical legal guidance. But I think, you know, one thing
that's a little unique about us is because we're really mission
driven. So we are really, we really want
more women to be managing more money, to be making more money,
to be using the money to employ other women, all of those things
to, to use that money to support their chosen political
candidates, right. Money is very powerful.
So we are really invested in in in the success of our of our
clients. But I'm happy you want me to do
like a basics kind. Of basics, yes, because for me,
when I'm looking at what you did, I was like blending it all
together. Yes.
Give us the outline, like how this works.
Because even this morning I have someone in my inbox being like,
hey, can you connect me with someone who wants to invest in
my queer company, right. And so these are the things that
come across. And so how does that play into
what you're doing? And yeah, give us the play by
play. OK.
So we'll talk about two pieces. We'll talk about venture capital
funds and then we'll talk about companies where venture capital
gets invested, right, These companies that are raising
money. So venture capital funds are,
it's really not that complicated.
It's I'm a venture capitalist and what I decide is I'm going
to raise a bunch of money and I basically put it in this big
pot. So I come like raise, raise,
raise, raise. They raise $100 million.
It's in this pot and now I get to make decisions about how that
money gets invested. And the way I'm going to invest
it is in these early, you know, you hear about these exciting
startups and tech companies, venture capital funds generally
invest in relatively early stage companies so that these young,
new high growth potential companies and that's it.
OK, I know I think finance and law, medicine, there are other
areas too where it's so easy to make it sound scary, but it's
right, it's relatively simple. Bring the money in, here's the
pool and then I get to make the decisions about it.
And then so on the other side of that transaction, right, I
decide I'm going to invest in this early stage company.
Here it is the early stage company and I we say write a
check, but why are funds to them under certain terms, right.
We think your company's value that X, we're going to invest Y.
And these are like some additional bells and whistles
that we want as part of that investment.
OK. And so your company, where does
it oversee this process? So we generally get started on
the fun side of the very beginning.
Like I said, a woman will come to us, she wants to start a fund
or she's starting for a second fund and we get started right
then. OK, what do you want this fund
to look like? What's important to you?
Here are some of the key terms. Let's walk through them together
because even though you're starting a venture, like anyone
who's dealt with lawyers know you're an expert in your area,
that doesn't mean that you understand the legal documents
that are being handed to you. No to.
Execute, right? Even read them.
Even if you read them, you might not understand them.
And So what you need, I think you need lawyers who are going
to walk you through them so you know what you're fighting.
Right. I have three female lawyers in
my life that look at everything and it's I.
I don't even know what I would do as a business owner without
that. So, well, you know, I mean a lot
of to be, you know, we all know too because we started, I've
been doing this for four years. When did you start your company?
I started back in 2022. Technically, like with an LLC.
Yeah. So what?
I've been doing this for 10 years.
Like social media strategy. So I think for all of us, when
we first start our companies too, you know, sometimes you
don't have the budget for lawyers, right?
And then what do you do? You just do your best.
So this is like no judgement. I mean, starting a company
running company is hard, yeah. It I got very scrappy.
I had lawyer friends. I put things together and I was
like, could you like look at this?
And I just pay you for the time it takes to like tweak things
and the document that I already did, which probably wasn't like
good ideas. But you do the best you can.
You do the entrepreneur every day is just doing the best you
can. Really is OK, so I love what
you're doing. So essentially let's get this
right. Women come to you when they're
saying, I want to start gathering a pool of money for
things that I, I believe in and women I want to invest in, yes.
That is one that is one part and then the other side are the
women who are, you know, you have a company, you probably
been running this company for a couple years.
Maybe you raised the Angel round or friends and family round.
We can talk about what those terms mean too, because they're
like right, elusive. And then you've gotten to a
point where you maybe have a little bit of money to pay for
lawyers and you want a little bit like a, you're looking for a
different relationship going into usually your next
fundraising round. So we don't raise the money, but
we're there with you the whole time saying, OK, these terms are
being offered. Let's talk about what those
terms mean for you. Let's talk about what they mean
now. Let's talk about what they mean
in five years. Let's make sure you're not one
of these horror stories of a woman who sells her company and
at that point owns 3% of it, right?
It's just, and it's so easy for that to happen, not because
women are stupid, as we know women are brilliant, but because
you don't know, like you don't know what you don't know, right?
And if somebody's telling you, oh, this, this is fine, this is
normal, you should do this. And you're like, oh, OK, you
must be right. So a lot of jargon, a lot of
numbers. And yeah, I, I'm currently going
into a licensing agreement right now.
We're going back and forth. It's it's it's so fun, so fun.
Yeah, but you want to ask you go through that right Any that's a
great that is an agreement that might last a long time it Yeah
right. I'm.
Hoping forever I'm hoping this is the deal of.
OK, forever agreement that my last forever.
So you want to it matters, right?
Those terms now matter. And it matters to how it sounds
like you have these great legal partners who will say, Sophia,
look, this is this one term. It means this right now, five
years from from now, it might mean this.
So let's just make sure you're comfortable with it, you're
happy with the money you're getting, you're you're
protected, you know, all those things.
I love it. So what happens like you just
mentioned, friends and family round Angel investors.
For people who don't know what that is, can you give us those
definitions and how that works? Yeah.
So why don't we can I can I just talk a little bit about
financing generally. Yeah, let's do it.
I say financing. I mean, any money that's coming
into your company other than like your clients and the
product you're selling, right, Any money that's coming into
your company. So a lot of us bootstrap our
companies, right? We don't take any money from the
outside. We figure out a way, yeah.
Did you figure you did a? Way to like do your best.
Maybe if you're really risk averse like me, you try to save
ahead of time. You know, I was very lucky,
right? Because I was had this great
corporate job, so I could like ferret a waste of money.
And if I didn't do that for me, I wouldn't have been able to
start my own firm. I just would have been too
afraid. Yeah.
I think I would have been too afraid.
So you can bootstrap your company.
So that's one option. Another option is you talk about
people who get loans, right? Small business loans.
So people, that's a debt. So it's where you borrow money
and you have to give it back. But they don't get to own any
part of your company, right? There's some which can be great,
right? To not give up ownership, give
up control. I'm kind of a control freak.
So for me, it would be very hard for me to give up some kind of
ownership in my company. OK.
So that's that. And then the sexy part that we
like to talk about, right, getting venture funding or Angel
funding, that is equity. So that is somebody giving you
money in exchange for a piece of your company, OK.
Which I am not not doing ever, at least right now.
I mean, I don't know, somebody come to me with like millions,
but. I feel, yeah, I feel that way
too. I think too.
I mean, so many reasons are 1 is like, this is my babe.
I love this business. Like I love this business.
Like the idea of somebody else getting to make decisions about
this business just feels so wrong to me.
But also there's something really appealing about, you
know, an exit scenario, which is like, do you want to be in the
service business your whole life?
Yeah. Which is why I've created a new
product that doesn't rely on my face, right?
Like, I have a new dating platform, the Queer Country
Club. Yeah.
So it doesn't rely on my face at all.
And it's amazing. But my personal brand has been
what's allowed me to bootstrap it, where everyone's like, how
much did you pay to develop this?
And I'm like, just me and my team, they're like, what?
Is it going to be? Is it subscription based?
It is subscription based, but there is an initiation fee.
So it, yeah, it's, it's, it's it.
We may get to where it makes sense if you come in and you
meet your future wife in one week.
We still got something for helping connect you.
So there is an initiation fee and then a subscription.
But yeah, no, I get that. Like, it's your baby.
It's your babies. I can see it in your eyes.
You're an entrepreneur like me, like you have this fire.
I do. Well, I mean, it's not totally
healthy, right? Because you're like I at least
I'm obsessive about this business.
I love this business anyway. So but for those people who are
bringing on, right, some companies you need outside,
outside capital like you just like sometimes it takes a lot of
money to build your product, to build your business up depending
on the type of the type of company it is.
So for those people, you can go out and we can talk about this
kind of levels when we talk about rounds or series of
financing, right? So the lowest level is usually
what people call Angel the Angel round or friends and family
round. So friends and family is a loose
term because most of us do not have friends and family who can
write us checks for 10/20 thirty $50,000 right?
So ask. I just wouldn't feel
comfortable. Some people do have those
friends and family, right? Good for them, good for them.
I definitely have some jealousy for that, but most people do
not. So it's really about going out
to your community, one or two steps removed from your
community, people who are interested in what you're
building and asking them, hey, I'm raising $1,000,000.
Could if you want to invest in my company, how much could you
invest? Could you invest 10,000?
Could you invest 50,000? Could you invest more than that?
And that's generally, what's the Angel round?
Friends and family rounds, pretty much the same thing.
It's like your earliest round of asking people to put money into
your business and that can range anywhere from say $100,000 up to
$1,000,000 depending on the business.
And then you have we call a seed round Series A, Series B, Series
C, Series C and these are kind of these terms are pretty,
pretty loose, but hopefully that kind of like the basic, yeah.
Of the fact and so your company helps with those contracts like
to make sure that everyone's getting paid and getting their
pieces of the pie as this company grows.
Yeah. So let's say for your dating
platform, let's say you decided you wanted to bring an outside
capital to like accelerate the growth of it and we were working
with you. What we would do is we would
say, OK, how much do you want to raise?
OK, good. We would talk to you about
valuation. So the reason valuation matters
is because you're selling a piece of your company at a
certain price, right? And that price depends on what
the what people see as the value now and in the future of your
company, right? And you can, a good way to think
about this is, you know, we're all familiar with Apple, right?
Apple is a publicly traded company.
It's traded on the New York Stock Exchange, or maybe it's
traded on NASDAQ, but it's publicly traded.
Anyone can buy shares of Apple right If you have the money, But
the price of those shares fluctuates based on what people
perceive to be the value of the company I.
Love it. You're breaking this down so
good for us. Thank you so much.
And like this is what I tell because beyond having a a dating
platform, I teach women how to show up online and make money.
And it's how you perceive yourself and how you valuable
you show up is how other people are going to perceive you.
Give me all your secrets. I love it.
The the the secret is truly showing up consistently and with
a real strategy, something that does work.
Because the truth is there's a million strategies out there,
but if you don't believe in the thing you're doing, you will not
be consistent to follow through with what you're doing to ever
see a result. So it's so important that you
can go, OK, if I do A, I'll get to B.
If I do B and follow through, I'll get to C.
And if you can be consistent, take those small steps, then you
will win. But and as you know, it's
whoever doesn't quit, right? Who doesn't take no for an
answer? That is so it, that is so it
like not just right. Any entrepreneurial journey,
when you know, whenever I talk to someone who's been doing this
for a longer period of time, you know, 10/15/20 years, I'm
always, give me, give me all your wisdom, give me all your
guidance. Like tell me what you wish you
would have known now. And most people say the same
thing, which is you just have to keep going.
You just have to keep going. And I, I'm a woo woo girl and I
like believe in God and I will literally be like, give me the
solution. I, I want an easy solution right
in front of me. And I just asked for, I'm
looking for it because I believe what we look for.
We're going to find. We're we're aware of it.
And so I'll just be like, where is it?
And even yesterday we were having something that we're
trying to solve like with some AI and I'm like, oh, but it
might not be that complex. And we just took a deep breath,
me and my team and we like looked at it again and we read
through some stuff more like, oh, it's actually this easy.
The solutions right here. So.
So I do that too. I'm not.
I'm, I'm a spiritual person, but not a religious person.
I don't know if that makes sense.
Totally. Makes sense.
I call myself inner spiritual, so yeah.
But I definitely believe in I'm woo woo in a different way.
I mean, I've like seen shamans and I've seen a breathwork
person and different types of healers.
And I am not just because I live in LA.
This was like when I was living in New York.
But I definitely have learned that there is there's a lot more
wisdom that we're not accessing. And for me, the way it comes
most easily, it's different for everyone.
I think right is writing. So if there's a question I have,
you know, you get in that, like, fuzzy headspace where, like,
everything's spinning around, like nothing feels like it's
falling into place. And for me, when I do that, if
I'm like, being my best self, I will just stop and I'll just
start free writing. What am I doing right now?
What am I thinking about right now?
I don't know. What is my priority now?
What should it be right now? And usually for me, the answer
comes pretty quickly. Not always, but yeah, those
little things matter. Otherwise just sitting there
being like, I'm going to think real, real hard on this, see if
it comes, I don't know, has not been that effective for me.
No, I get it. I totally get it.
And I, I just believe the answers usually are within.
And if they're not, then I always ask like God, universe,
source, like put whoever, I it's not always what you need to see.
It's who needs to help you next. Like maybe someone's listening
to this podcast episode on Apple Podcast in two months from now.
Oh my gosh, can I just sorry, can I interrupt really quickly
because I I'm not looking at the comments, but one popped out
Reema Roy, who on the who's following your live right now?
She actually worked at one of our very first clients.
So one of our clients that came with us when I launched all
places Rima worked there. So it's like, sorry, it's just
so amazing to see her name. I love it.
I love it at the power of social media.
No, it's totally fine. I love it.
No, when I see my clients, I'm like, pause so and so's in the
house. You're all good.
I and I love it.
And I think people forget that social media is social.
Like it is about making yourself, you're as big as you
make yourself on the Internet. If you play small and you show
up and you're small, then your social media probably won't
blast off. But we also need to remember
that it is social and like build that community.
So I'm so glad you paused. I think community for me too,
has been one of the probably the biggest supports for me and
building this business. And when people ask me when they
ask me, you know what, like, what do you think has been most
helpful to you Or as an entrepreneur, what should I do
if I'm starting out? Focusing on your community and
relying on your community are like always very close to you,
if not at the top of my list. I mean, I have some of my, some
of my closest community people have been most valuable to me
are technically my competitors. Yeah.
There are other women who are running law firms who just want
to support right? So we share.
With. This how do you go with this?
How are you pricing this? How are you pricing this?
And again, technically competitors, but there's so much
space, right? Yeah.
And in the legal world, you need to be able to refer people all
the time. You can't take on everybody,
right? Like.
Yep, that's right. You've got your ideal client.
That's that makes a lot of sense.
I work with a lot of lawyers, by the way, in my program, so I'm
learning a lot now when it comes to.
Lawyers. Yeah, OK.
I was about to ask you actually. Like if someone's about to take
the leap, ask someone who took the leap to start her own firm,
no matter what it is for them. If they're about to leave
corporate America to be a life coach or to start their own
cupcake place, like, what would it be?
What would that advice be from you?
So I would say start socializing the idea.
That's good. And some people like, hold it
very close, right? They're afraid that if they
share their idea that someone's going to take it.
But as you said, really the main key to success is not giving up.
And most people, most people don't want to be entrepreneurs,
right? And good for them because in
some ways it's so terrible, right?
It's so wonderful. Like.
Miserable. Terrible.
But yeah, if someone offered us, and I was talking to my my
manager this morning, I said if we were offered $10 million for
this, would you quit right now? We both agreed absolutely not
because it's a game to us. It's like we want to get to the
next level. But I bet you feel that.
Like it's so terrible. To.
Describe it you're like hang offered your life like a roller
coaster. Like you're like, but I'm
addicted. Like I'm totally addicted to
getting to that next this and that, next this and the next
this, right? You become this like growth
junkie. Just just need a little bit
more. Just going to get a little bit
more, yeah. And even listening to the
podcast later, like they can't see the smiles on our faces,
like we look like crackers. Thank God.
So your question though, oh, what I would tell them, yeah,
socialize the idea. So this is, this was really
helpful for me. I went out to the people, well,
who would be my clients, right? Not that they would directly be
a client, but they were in our kind of target client world and
just started sharing with them what I was thinking.
Like this is what I'm thinking. This is how it would work.
And what all places ended up being is not the same as what it
started as, right? Because I had some ideas about
how it would work and got feedback that that wouldn't work
for them and why. And those conversations are hard
too. And you have to have them with
people who are going to be honest with you, which is not
everyone, but so valuable because this is this is your
early client. You know, that's how somebody in
CPG would describe it, right? This is your early client
research. OK, what do you want?
I'm creating this for you. Do you?
Is this even what you want? I love that.
And I think through that process, it sounds a lot like
what I'm talking about when I'm telling people who are new to
building their business. I'm like, go out and like give a
miniature version of your offer or a discounted version of your
offer to get reviews, testimonials, feedback before
you build out a whole program and what you need.
Yeah. And what you need to figure out
during that time is what's your differentiating factors.
So like there there's a million different service providers,
there's a million different coaches who do it.
I do blah, blah, blah. But look what makes.
You different. All your Kitty needs.
You're welcome. OK, back to the show.
What makes your process different?
Were you able to figure out how you'd set yourself apart in your
industry when you were in that phase of socializing?
Or did it take actually working with clients before you started
figuring that out? It's such an interesting
question and such a such a critical one for when you're
starting a business. So I knew it definitely kind of,
you know, through these conversations evolved.
I knew that I wanted to work with women, and I knew that I
specifically wanted to work with women around money, right?
Because I'd seen this data like these terrible.
So before I was a lawyer if I was going to be an economist.
So I love numbers. Oh God and my, my worst
nightmare. So you see these numbers are
like the stats around how much money is being invested in women
owned businesses, how much money is being managed by women.
It's like nothing. It is so small and it's so
painful. And so I knew I was like, I
mean, I know it was a great lawyer.
And so I wanted to start using those skills for something that
felt meaningful to me. So I knew that part of it, but I
didn't know how that would translate into a law firm that
felt different, right? Was it if it looked just like
everybody else, how would people know that?
Were we, were we really doing anything different or were we
just serving this one community? And it was, you know, just a
series of conversations with people.
So a great friend of mine runs this incredible branding agency.
Her name's Linda Honan. The Branding institute called
the Outset. And she was one of the people I
had a very early conversation with.
And she started, we formally engaged them, and she had a
vision. And for this business that was
very uncomfortable for me in some ways because for me, I
thought people wouldn't take us seriously if we didn't look like
everybody else. Yeah.
So I was really worried about that.
I mean, we also have this funny name, right?
We're not like Johnson and Gimlet, you know, LLT.
Thank you. Say it again for everybody.
It's all. All places.
It actually comes from a quote from Justice Ginsburg, which is
women belong in all places where decisions are being made.
Oh, I have goosebumps. I know just still get goosebumps
every time I say it like you can't see them on live, but
they're they're there. So we just decided like we're
just going to be different. We want you to come to us and
feel not that we are just for women, but that we are building
women matter to us. We want you here like we want
you and we want to create a different experience for you.
We won't working with law firm to feel it can be beautiful.
It can feel like a partnership. It can feel like we're really
invested. So if you go to our website, it
does not look like a law firm, typical law firm.
It's beautiful, it's feminine and that's so that was part of
it. So I think you know, what we
where we are now is, you know, we're a mission driven law firm.
That is a differentiator for us and we want our clients to feel
in partnership with us, feel like they're part of our
community, and feel like working with your lawyer is a joyful,
beautiful experience. Wow, that is so different than
what's out there, Jesse, and what's going to make you
incredibly successful. Thank you.
Yes. And like I can, I can feel your
passion when you talk about it and everyone who's building a
business right now or even like, let's break it down to what I'm
doing, like dating profiles. How do you want someone to feel
when they land on your website? The way you just knew how you
want someone to feel and their nervous system and how you want
them to feel when they land on your social media profiles.
How What's the vibe like? Vibe track of the room.
You get literally like 2 seconds to give someone the vibe on your
website, on your social platform and tell them what's in it for
them and now. What I'm?
Yeah, that's our dating world. It's like, OK, you, you got the
same attention span, sadly, like I love TikTok, but it's ruined
our attention span. Like we're, we're a swiping
world really quickly now. And so my dating platform, I
pride myself and the fact that we don't swipe.
It is about intentional communication, community and
then meeting people through there and sharing your real
preferences as to what you're looking for in a future wife.
But you've got a moment, you've got a a few seconds, whether
you're a business or you're a dating profile to lock someone
in. And I think like what you just
shared, I know there will be women listening to this or they
were listening to it now or six months from now going, Oh my
God, I want to work with Jesse because I want to feel that when
I work with my lawyer and I don't feel that when I work with
my lawyer now and that it's. You know, it's so, so
interesting and definitely not in my conscious mind when I was
creating this business, but it makes so much sense, right?
It's like, what is that feeling that hits you when you land on,
right, any, any company's website or social page or
whatever it is? Like, what is it?
How do you feel like in your body when you like, Does it feel
like it's for you? Does it feel comfortable?
Yeah. And it actually wasn't
consciously there, but it's so interesting.
I'm going to be thinking about that more.
Yeah, and like just for anyone listening, whether it's a
landing page or copy under a post or social media profile,
immediately tell people what they're looking for.
Like if you're looking for this, we are this rather than leading
with we are this and we want to help you.
It's make it immediately about them because everyone wants to
know within a couple seconds what's in it for me, even if
they're the best person in the world.
So if we can make it, hey, this is what's in it for you.
Before you even get to why you're going to love us, that's
what it's going to sell. Tell me more.
Say that, Say that again. Tell me more about that because
I'm already thinking. I'm like, how do we?
What are we doing or what do we need to?
Yeah. I didn't even look at like your
your landing page yet because I went to your social media, but
like on landing pages copy instead of just being like weird
this as the headline when someone's landing on a page over
and over and that's your main page.
It's super important that it's like you're this like calling
them out to self identify. I like to say people know
they're sick, but they don't know they have the flu.
They know they have the symptoms, but they don't know
it's the flu. And so if we can call it
symptoms and get someone to self identify, they're going to be
selling themselves to you saying I need you.
I have the cough, I have this, I have that.
And then they're like, I need the doctor for this problem.
But if they can self identify rather than you being like, hi,
I'm a doctor, I can help you, right?
Do you see the psychology there? The psychology?
And you can do this on your dating profiles.
You can do this on your social media profiles.
If you're looking for this, you're in the right place and
that you're in the right place. You don't have to say it just
like that, but that that's where you wrap your arms around
someone with your words and be like this is the community for
you. So.
Makes so much sense. Yeah, I also, I am also really
drawn and where I think maybe the next phase of our website,
we're going to put together an FAQ page and maybe this will
come into into that too. But one thing I always
appreciate is when people say who this is not for.
Right. It's.
Like we're not here for everyone.
We are not here for this. We actually just we have a
virtual assistant and we work, we work with one service to do
it. And we just changed to a
different service called Squared Away, which specifically is
support families, military family.
So stay at home spouses I. Love.
That Yeah. And it was started by a woman
love. It and I.
I just heard great feedback, you know, from other people.
I've had a great experience. The assistants are so great.
And I went on their web page and at some point in the web page
they say we don't work with assholes.
I love. It it's just that awesome.
And there's no, there are no asterisks or something like it's
assholes. We don't work with assholes.
And it's like, OK. And what that signals to me is I
appreciate, I appreciate that value.
We don't work with assholes either, right?
We don't. And I will never be an asshole
to. You not for long, not for not
for long, but seeing that I'm like, oh, that's and you're just
putting it out there. You know, this is not what we're
about. We're about people who treat our
employees really well. That's who we want to work with.
And I was like, I just feel more in love with this company.
Yeah, No, I totally get that. And I'm I've built a lot of my
success off of the US versus the mentality in marketing.
And honestly, guys, this is something that we've seen very
divisive. We won't name names, but
political leaders do, right? And they're able to create these
caught followings by saying, well, this is them and This Is
Us. And at the end of the day, every
single very successful famous, iconic person or business knows
very clearly, even let's go back to Apple, we are not Android
users, right? There's a difference.
So beautiful. So beautifully summed.
Apple's branding. So beautifully summed up.
We're not Android users. Oh yeah, exactly.
You nailed it. Yes.
So for me when it comes to my business side where I teach you,
I'm not working with lazy people, I'm working with go
getter queers. If you're lazy, don't even talk
to me, You're you're going to hate me.
And then if, if it comes to the the dating, it's I don't work
with anyone who's polyamorous. I'm helping women seeking
monogamy. I love my polyamorous friends.
I have plenty of them in real life, but that's not my
business. So if you're polyamorous isn't
for you. If you're like, still talking to
your ex, this ain't for you. This is the same place for women
looking for their wives. Yeah.
So what is it for you when you think about your business, what
is it in people listening? I want you to do this exercise.
Let's go. What is it for you?
Yeah. So we work with people who are
committed to the mission of gender equity in capital markets
that and by capital markets, I mean you know, venture capital,
private equity, right, any of these areas that are about
managing capital money and that's it.
Could you start have to be in your cause?
What would be your we don't work with asshole statement that you
could start maybe playing with in your social media without it
being that exactly. Just something for you and your
team to think. On, you know.
Yeah, I will. I mean, we definitely don't work
with assholes. We don't work with people who
don't pay us. I love it.
That's a deal breaker for us. Has not always been a deal
breaker, hasn't always been, I mean, I'm being honest here,
right? Hasn't always been a deal
breaker. We work with people who value
what we do. So if you don't value what we
do, if you're going to like get a bill from us and you know, we
are really transparent about fees too.
You never get a surprise bill from us.
It's all very upfront. So if you don't value what we
do, that's cool. You're not the client for us.
And so in your coffee. Let me share this other one
because this came out of actually our strategic planning
session. I don't know why I didn't say
this first. We work with clients who can
easily pay us. Love it, love.
It. That that is what it's about.
Like I always tell people in in coaching or whatever your
services, they're at their breaking point where they
realize if they don't, they're going to miss out on a lot of
money. Like it's a no brainer to work
with you because otherwise they would get like in the booty with
no Lube later. It would be a bad time.
It'd be a bad time, that is. Not a That's not a turn of
phrase that comes up a lot for me on a podcast.
I wouldn't think that everyone loves you.
They're like, you just said fuck and Jesus and lesbian in the
same sentence. And I'm like, huh, I guess, you
know, you're like. All part of me so.
Multi faceted. OK, love it, love it, love it.
We got a question for at the beginning.
I just want to go through the comments real quick.
Someone said what if I run a company but have an idea for
something that has nothing to do with my original job?
Like right now I need an app developed.
My advisor would be like, well, keep running the company that's
making you revenue and and then start doing what you said that
advice of like socializing the idea, right.
I like that too. The other thing that in my
lawyer brain pops up is if you're running one company and
you have investors in that company, then that it gets a
little stickier for you to start another company, right?
So if that's the case, you need to be thoughtful about that
part. If that's not the case, you're
like, I bootstrapped this one and then I also want to do this
one. Great.
You can set it up as a standalone company if you want,
if you're going to bring investors into it.
But if you own all this and you're going to own all of this,
just do it under the same kind of like in terms of corporate
structure generally doesn't matter.
It's just going to be another product that you own.
Yeah, like I said, start socializing it.
Start thinking about what's unique about it and put together
so dull. Put together a basic business
plan. How much like to get to a, you
know, a beta product, an early product, What are you going to
need? How much money are you going to
need? Who are you going to need to
hire? Because these things sometimes
it can be pretty quick, but sometimes it's really expensive.
And also maybe look at your finance.
This is what I tell everyone too before they start a business or
a fund. Look at your own finances.
How much money are you willing to spend or how long can you go
without a salary before you start committing to one of these
things because you know personal finances are critical critical,
but I. Think we're afraid you?
Need a place to live? You need to, right?
You need to for a lot of You need to support your family.
You need to support your aging parents.
You need to right? We all have different personal
responsibilities when it comes to money.
Yeah, and it doesn't. You can decide to do a season of
sacrifice for your business like I.
Oh, what a nice phrase. Did you come up with that?
I may have heard a mentor say it before, but I don't know if she
came up with it or if another mentor before.
I like it. Yeah, I'm going.
To start using that. Yeah, it's, it's really good,
but sacrifice, like I literally still live in the same one
bedroom space that I like rented whenever I left the man.
But then when I realized I was gay, the man that I had lived
with and worked for and my friends every time they come
over say, Oh my God, the bat cave.
Like cuz it's like so small. They're like the energy in here
is like millions of dollars. And I'm like, yeah, so it's just
so funny. Or like people will say that
their dad posted a picture with one of my friends and we were in
her car and her car wasn't fancy and they went off on me.
Like how can you say you're so successful but not have a fancy
car? And I was like first of all,
this is my friend's car. Don't be hating on my friend's
car. Like that is not cool.
And that friend lives in a multi $1,000,000 house and doesn't
give a shit about her car. People have different
priorities. OK, so let's not go there.
But people decide where to put their money.
I like to put it back into my business and into my closet and
travel and and you will decide during your season of sacrifice
like, OK, maybe you do still have a nice space, but you don't
have like a fancy car. Like everyone has their things
that they're gone to have to like is your business important
to you? I.
Completely, Yeah, completely, completely agree with that.
Yeah. I.
So I'm, I'm 47 and I can look around at other women my age and
they own homes and they write all of these different things
and I still have like a little insecurity about those
conversations like, oh, I should own a house by now and I should
blah, blah, blah. And you know, I live, we, my
husband and I, we rent a house like a 2 bedroom house, a little
house and I love it. I'm obsessed.
We have, we have one car, it's a Honda.
I love it. I love that car, right?
I love that car. And do I think I do think, you
know, oh, down the road, what would be my dream car, which by
the way, is like a 1990s Porsche.
I like it. What color?
I'm not. I mean, Blue comes to mind, but
I'd have to. But I think about stuff like
that. Oh, that'll be fun when that
happens. But is that going to happen now?
No, because I'm building this business.
I have the team, right? I want to pay.
I want to pay my team well, right.
There are benefits, there are taxes, there are, you know, it's
I'm going to do that and invest. I wouldn't say, I wouldn't
describe it necessarily as a season of sacrifice because I'm
still living very comfortably. I'm very lucky.
But yeah, you have to, you know, you put the money in.
Sure. There are lots of other things I
could do with that money. Lots of priorities, everyone's
got different ones. I love it.
Someone says you're looking fabulous for 47 just.
Thank you. I will.
And then? Someone else had me cruising
around in my 2003 Toyota Camry. I mean truly it does not matter
for me this year. Like investing in all kinds of
new like tech for my company was so priority.
And like I always I was, I was taught this actually by someone
that I dated before who is really successful and they would
say why? Like why buy the shoes?
You can't buy the shoes. But like, can you put that money
back into your business and make like whatever you buy for
yourself? Can you match that and put that
back into your? Business.
Like that needs to be the first thing and then like, and it
really makes sense. And I also, I don't, this might
sound terrible, but I really don't budget.
I'm at a place of abundance where I don't budget, but I buy
what I need and everything else just goes back.
It just goes back. Yeah, Yeah.
I mean, again, numbers person. So we definitely have a budget
for the business, but I'm actually not super strict about
it because I also think we're going to grow.
We're going to grow. And I obviously have, you know,
scary, fearful moments. A lot of them I'm like, what
have we done grow? What if we fail?
But, but mostly I'm thinking we're going to keep growing.
We're going to keep growing. Is this money well spent right
now? I think it is.
And sometimes too, I've had a hard time accepting this.
But there are some ways that I spend money on this business
that I derive a lot of pleasure from.
If there are conferences I really want to go to and I know
I'm going to have an amazing time and it's not cheap.
And part of me has felt bad about that.
Like somehow a business expenses should be painful.
I don't know, No, my own issue, my own issues, but there are
things that we spend money on for the business where I'm like,
I love this. Like I would probably buy this
for my like if this were just my personal money, which it kind of
is because I'm the only one who wants the business, I would
still spend this money. And how great, how great that
you have a business doing something that you love so much
that you can spend money and go do something valuable to the
business that also is like sole nourishing for.
You absolutely I, I, I feel that way.
I have conferences or online conferences or different
coaching containers. I'm in which by the way, PPB is
a tax write off my profitable personal brand coaching program.
And if anyone's listening to this and they're like, Oh my
God. Yes.
If anyone's listening to this and they're like, I want to
learn more about that, please just DM me on Instagram and tell
me where you're struggling in your business or like where
you're struggling getting your idea off the ground with social
media and I'll help you. If you don't have social media,
you can e-mail me support it, Sophia Espino.
But Instagram's the easiest place to do that.
And then what about you, Jesse? If someone's like, Oh my God, I
want to work with her, how do they get in contact?
So. You can actually just go right
to our website and you we have like pretty rad SEO.
So if you just Google all places, we will be the top
search result. Wow, I know, right?
And you go to the website and if you Scroll down to the bottom,
we'll see. We try to make it really easy.
We try to be very accessible. So if you Scroll down to the
bottom, there's actually a link to our calendar and you can book
a 15 minute session with us. It's free, you just put it right
there Calendly. OK, I love it.
I love it. And go ahead and follow you on
Instagram. What Instagram do you want them
to follow, Jesse? So our Instagram is at this is
all places and then we're also really active on LinkedIn.
So me directly or our our company?
Amazing. Thank you for being on the show
today and breaking down all of these, I don't know, scary words
for the creative girlies like me.
OK, I'm a creative girly. Completely my my pleasure makes
me feel, makes me feel valuable that I can that I can provide
that. Thank you.
Thank you so much for welcoming me into your community.
You're welcome and I truly thought you were a lawyer and a
venture Venture. Catholic.
I mean, I was like, I can't say this.
I I can't say this thought has not occurred to me.
Like oh someday I start my own fun.
Like I know how to do it now so. I.
I certainly fun's really hard. It's really hard.
Take this is the grain of salt, not professional advice, but I
like feel compelled spiritually to tell you maybe this was like
a intuitive hit to do that. Like I like I saw that, I don't
know, like it was. Yeah, I.
Don't know, just all absorb that.
Faster on it. See what happens.
Yeah, about two years ago, one of my now clients messaged me
and I thought it was a really weird, creepy, cold DM, which
still so icky. And she said you're going to
teach women the the keys to wealth.
And at that point I was only like modeling and making less
than two $3000. And I just told her I was like,
thanks. That's like, yeah, I was like,
this is so like, shady. Does she even know me?
Her name's Lauren Courtney. And a few months go by, that
doesn't come over my brain anymore.
And she actually, like, messages me about childhood trauma.
And it's like, hey, this is affecting your body right now.
And, like, named the person in my family that had hurt me.
Yeah. That I've never told anyone
about. That is freaky.
Crazy. She's legit.
So yeah. And then about a year later, I
ended up like just getting these ideas and I was like, oh, I
should be coaching in this. Like, this is what I do, but
like, I should be doing it myself.
And then boom, it happened. And I have a feeling that you'll
be telling me that like, give it two years, two years.
Jesse, you're like, I'll be, I'll be sending you a creepy DM.
Well no, this is my creepy DM to you, like I see.
It Remember Me? I'm a venture capitalist now.
Thank you I will never forget you ever.
This is an amazing conversation. Thank you Jessie have an amazing
day and anyone listening if you want to work with Jessie please
reach out to her. This is all places on.
Instagram, yes. All right.
Thanks so much, Sophia. Bye everybody.
As clear women, that's women with an X.
Because of course, we are inclusive here.
As I was saying, as queer women, we haven't always been lifted up
or celebrated. We have often felt left out and
put down in places that historically haven't welcomed
us. In fact, we have been
conditioned by society to be grateful for mere tolerance.