On this episode, relaxed erections versus clenching
erections, this is the holistic alpha male optimization podcast
where we help you unleash your true power as a man.
Hey guys, welcome back to the show.
I'm Stephen Mathis. Thank you for being part of this
tribe, this growing tribe of men who are prioritizing sexual
health, recognizing the impact that sexuality has in our lives.
You're only listening to this episode based on the title, if
that is a priority, if it's something that matters to you.
So good on you. Thanks for being here.
Let's talk about relaxed erections versus clenching
erections. By default, we in essence have
clenching erections when we grow up as we start to have
erections, a couple of things are true. 1 is that when we get
an erection, typically the default response is to kind of
squeeze that root muscle. It is to clench in response to
that erection. And then the other part of it is
that again, kind of our default setting is to clench and squeeze
when we are trying to get an erection early on in your edging
practice, early on in having sex or before you're trying to have
sex, right? That is kind of the default
response. However, like with a lot of
being human, the default response is actually often not
the one that helps us thrive. Same thing is true here, the one
that helps us thrive in our sexuality, the one that helps us
thrive in terms of our erection quality, in terms of our
control. We'll talk a little bit more
about both of those in a second is in fact practicing relaxed
erections. Now, it will not happen
overnight and it's not a sort of yes or no this the the switch is
flipped One Direction or the other.
What this is, is gradually building our ability to both get
and maintain an erection with a relaxed root muscle in a relaxed
state, as well as to maintain that erection in a relaxed state
no matter what arousal level you're at.
Now, the different pieces of that may be in place for you to
some degree, and others not so much, right?
So you may have no problem, for example, getting an erection
while you stay relaxed, but then as you start to get really
aroused, you do have a challenge staying relaxed, right?
So what I would encourage you to do is as a general principle, as
often as possible, we want to practice getting and having
erections with a relaxed root muscle.
Again, it's not going to happen overnight.
A good place to to pay attention to this and to start doing this
is when you're in your edging practice.
When you begin your edging practice, it is very tempting
for a lot of guys and it's it's tempting for me at times still
and certainly more so in the past.
It is tempting to get into that squeezing kind of action right
away as you begin your edging practice.
And the mere act of being patient and patience is key
because if you're going to be patient in the beginning, if
you're going to stay relaxed and you're not going to squeeze that
root muscle at all, it may take you longer to get erect.
It may take you significantly longer.
In fact, you may have to work with it over a course of days or
weeks to kind of gradually start incorporating that more and
more. However, when you do and when
you practice not only getting an erection, staying relaxed in
your root muscle, but also keeping that erection, which
again is its own thing to practice.
As you practice both of those things, two things are going to
happen. One is you're going to have
better erections more easily because part of what we're doing
here is, is programming our body for how it's going to achieve
and maintain an erection, right? There's some mind body
connection stuff going on there. There's also an effect of
actually strengthening your erections over time because when
you can maintain an erect state, when you're relaxed, it is
actually strengthening your erection in a very interesting
way. So when you practice this more
and more, two things are going to happen.
One is you're going to get better erections more easily.
I promise you, you will find this it's kind of
counterintuitive and I absolutely talk about and yes,
it is very important to have a strong root muscle to practice
your Kegel squeezes to practice drawing that energy up with with
squeezes and draws in a very intentional way.
When you're in your edging practice when you're having sex,
yes, that is very important. However, this issue of actually
maintaining a relaxed state with an erection, getting an erection
and at various arousal levels is one of the best things you could
possibly focus on across the different types of you know,
whether it's edging or it's having sex across the different
parts of that those experiences. It is one of the best things you
can focus on. So it will improve your
erections. And then the other thing is it
will improve your control absolutely massively.
This is the number one thing you could do as a general principle
if you would like to improve your control and your stamina.
The general principle to practice is getting maintaining
an erection with a relaxed root muscle, including at any sort of
arousal level. And wherever you're at with
that, you just kind of start to take the next step, right?
So if for example, let's say if you go to have an edging
practice today and if you stay completely relaxed, you
basically can't get an erection at all.
OK, do that for a couple minutes.
Don't get upset about it. Be patient, practice it a little
bit and then maybe transition into your normal thing.
And then you come back tomorrow and you practice it again.
You practice it again, you're going to start to find that you
can start to get an erection with a relaxed root muscle.
And this is something have you had the experience where once
you kind of get going, your erection is OK, but it doesn't
come as easily and quickly as you would like.
For example, maybe you're making out with your partner and you
would love to like get a hard erection at that point when
you're aroused, but it actually takes some stimulation,
etcetera, to really get that erection.
This process of practicing getting an erection and you're
edging practices, of course, really the the primary place to
practice this, this this process of practicing getting an
erection while you stay relaxed, it will make a big difference in
how easily you get erections in those kind of situations.
So I hope this makes sense. As always, I hope you find value
in the show and I appreciate you being here.
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Leave a five star review that'll help other guys like you find
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Easy to do as always, thanks for being here with me, I really
appreciate it. Go Kee stacking bricks in your
life. Talk to you soon.