1 00:00:07,560 --> 00:00:11,520 All right, welcome folks to the Men's Sexual Mastery Podcast. 2 00:00:11,520 --> 00:00:16,520 A place where we can slow down, breathe deeper, and connect 3 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:20,120 again and again to the sacred power, the sacred current of 4 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:24,160 life force, sexual energy that flows through us, all of us, all 5 00:00:24,160 --> 00:00:27,080 of the time. We're happy to be with you again 6 00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:31,280 today, to drop into all topics in the realm of sacred 7 00:00:31,280 --> 00:00:36,040 sexuality, sexual mastery, and overall life alignment. 8 00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:39,920 How you doing today, Ben? What are you checking in with? 9 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,280 Yeah. Thank you, brother. 10 00:00:42,320 --> 00:00:43,840 Thank you brothers, for tuning in. 11 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:47,680 Ben here checking in. I'm feeling vital. 12 00:00:47,680 --> 00:00:51,120 I'm feeling really just fired up today. 13 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:54,920 Even though I had an ejaculation this morning, which was 14 00:00:55,000 --> 00:01:00,560 unexpected, It's just so nice to, and I'm so grateful to be at 15 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:06,240 a, a place in my own knowledge and practice and you know, all 16 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:10,440 these tools and protocol to just not even miss a beat. 17 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,080 Like I feel like I'm still riding the wave. 18 00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:16,320 There's just a tiny little dip. And then I just got straight 19 00:01:16,320 --> 00:01:20,440 into my practices, straight into my protocol and I'm, I'm here 20 00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:22,840 and I'm fired up. So I'm in with that. 21 00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:27,480 I'm brother. I'm curious for anyone listening 22 00:01:27,480 --> 00:01:30,960 in that might be like what, why did Ben just speak to his 23 00:01:30,960 --> 00:01:33,000 ejaculation? Could you share a little bit 24 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:36,800 just to catch anyone up to speed about why that may have an 25 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:39,400 impact on you, why that feels relevant for you to check in 26 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,000 with? Yeah, yeah. 27 00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:44,240 If you're new to the space, we talk a lot in this space about 28 00:01:44,960 --> 00:01:48,760 semen retention or we like to use the word semen intention. 29 00:01:49,520 --> 00:01:53,320 The benefits of not ejaculating for periods of time. 30 00:01:54,040 --> 00:01:58,400 This allows us to build up the sexual energy in our body, which 31 00:01:58,880 --> 00:02:02,400 has all sorts of effects from, you know, increased energy and 32 00:02:02,400 --> 00:02:07,680 vitality and stamina and focus both in the bedroom and outside. 33 00:02:07,680 --> 00:02:13,200 The bedroom brings a lot more depth of awareness and presence, 34 00:02:13,640 --> 00:02:15,640 I would say in every area of my life. 35 00:02:15,640 --> 00:02:19,360 And when it comes to the bedroom, it leads to deeper and 36 00:02:19,360 --> 00:02:21,520 deeper levels of connection with my partner. 37 00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:25,720 And out in the world, I noticed my workouts are a lot stronger 38 00:02:26,160 --> 00:02:28,440 business building. Like I get more ideas. 39 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:32,040 My creativity is just through the roof compared to what it 40 00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:33,920 used to be before discovering this stuff. 41 00:02:33,920 --> 00:02:38,320 A lot of this is we say it's like the greatest biohack of all 42 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:42,040 time that, you know, traditional Chinese medicine talks about and 43 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:45,160 Ayurvedic lineages and yogic traditions. 44 00:02:45,160 --> 00:02:47,200 But it's just making its way to the West now. 45 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:50,440 So yeah, that's that's what we're talking about. 46 00:02:50,440 --> 00:02:52,000 Is there anything you'd add to that, Hawks? 47 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:56,040 I feel good about how you summed it up. 48 00:02:56,040 --> 00:02:59,640 I I want to ask one more question on that topic though, 49 00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:03,920 is what is it that you feel allowed you to move through that 50 00:03:03,920 --> 00:03:06,640 in a more graceful way this particular morning? 51 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:17,400 Well, you know, when I first started, I had a lot of kind of 52 00:03:17,400 --> 00:03:19,360 performance pressure I would put on myself. 53 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:24,120 I had a strong inner critic. I was also pretty depleted. 54 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:27,240 You know, honestly, we say it's kind of like recharging a 55 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:31,440 battery bank. And if your battery's at 5% and 56 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:34,600 when you ejaculate, maybe that's a 5% dip, it's going to feel 57 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:37,960 pretty fucking hard because you're already so depleted. 58 00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:41,760 But, you know, when your battery's at 100% and plugged 59 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:45,720 into the charger bank and it dips 5%, it's just it's much 60 00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:49,600 less of an impact. I'm So I'd say that combined 61 00:03:49,600 --> 00:03:54,040 with much more positive self talk than I had in the past. 62 00:03:55,120 --> 00:03:57,720 Yeah. Just not not making a big deal 63 00:03:57,720 --> 00:03:59,200 out of it. Like we say in a lot of our 64 00:03:59,200 --> 00:04:02,840 work, in this men's work and the sexual training that we do with 65 00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:07,240 men, you know, when we fall down, we just get back up again 66 00:04:07,240 --> 00:04:10,200 right away. And just like a baby learning to 67 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:13,120 walk, like we have to make these stumbles. 68 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:16,440 And it's not about stumbling. It's about just getting back up 69 00:04:16,440 --> 00:04:21,399 again and not getting into a loop of shame or guilt or I 70 00:04:21,399 --> 00:04:24,680 should have or like, there's no mistakes. 71 00:04:24,680 --> 00:04:27,680 There's just lessons. And, you know, I'm getting to a 72 00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:30,640 level of vitality now in my personal life and in my 73 00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:35,200 relationship where I mean, like I had, you know, I think sex 5 74 00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:40,840 or 6 days this week, like before leading up to this release, I'm 75 00:04:40,840 --> 00:04:43,960 like, we just had a very vital sex life and I was holding it 76 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:47,080 that whole time. So between that and all my other 77 00:04:47,080 --> 00:04:51,880 practices that I do, I just, there's so much on abundance of 78 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:56,560 sexual energy where it just doesn't, yeah, doesn't have that 79 00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:59,040 effect. And you know, my myself talk is 80 00:04:59,040 --> 00:05:01,880 a lot more positive. And this is another benefit of 81 00:05:01,880 --> 00:05:05,320 it is like when you start overflowing with this energy, 82 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:09,800 it's just, there's just an increased overall increased 83 00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:13,560 sense of well-being and just less mental chatter. 84 00:05:14,320 --> 00:05:17,480 It's more love essentially, you know, seeping through me. 85 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:22,520 So that's my answer to yeah, how I'd say this. 86 00:05:22,560 --> 00:05:24,800 I'm I've been able to navigate this in this way. 87 00:05:26,520 --> 00:05:29,520 Yeah, right on. Yeah, One of the things I'm 88 00:05:29,520 --> 00:05:34,400 hearing is your cup is full. And so a little bit of overflow 89 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:38,040 from a full cup and it's not the end of the world. 90 00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:41,960 And another to play on that analogy a little more. 91 00:05:41,960 --> 00:05:46,640 If if the cup spills over a little bit, rather than fumbling 92 00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:50,480 and getting nervous about it or going into spirals of shame or 93 00:05:50,480 --> 00:05:53,840 negative self talk, that could lead that cup to tilting further 94 00:05:53,840 --> 00:05:55,640 and spilling more of that energy out. 95 00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:59,960 You're able to remain grounded, calm and like, yeah, OK, when my 96 00:05:59,960 --> 00:06:02,640 cup's full in a little bit spilled over the top, not the 97 00:06:02,640 --> 00:06:05,320 end of the world. I'm not going to lose my balance 98 00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:10,440 and pour out heaps more. And then another thing I heard 99 00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:13,040 is connecting to love. And I know you're in a beautiful 100 00:06:13,040 --> 00:06:15,760 partnership in union with your beloved. 101 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:19,800 And yeah, I'd love to hear a little bit about your take on 102 00:06:20,120 --> 00:06:24,080 how having an ejaculation or release like that differs when 103 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:26,960 you're in a partnership, when you're in a heart centered 104 00:06:26,960 --> 00:06:30,960 lovemaking experience with someone versus maybe a a more 105 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:35,560 traditional form of masturbation that that many men might go 106 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:37,720 through on a regular basis using pornography. 107 00:06:39,360 --> 00:06:42,520 Yeah, yeah. It's a great, great question. 108 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,280 Yeah. When we, you know, in ancient 109 00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:51,040 tantric practices and then the Taoist lineages and the stuff 110 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:56,640 that we're we're bringing through here, the cock, the, the 111 00:06:56,880 --> 00:07:01,120 penis, the lingam as it's called, is actually considered 112 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:04,960 to be the, the wand of the heart is what they call it. 113 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:09,560 It's the furthest, most extremity of the body of the 114 00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:13,240 heart channel as it's understood, you know, the very 115 00:07:13,240 --> 00:07:17,160 tip of the penis and acupuncture is the heart point. 116 00:07:17,680 --> 00:07:21,160 That's for a reason, you know, and when our heart and our cock 117 00:07:21,360 --> 00:07:25,760 is aligned, we call that hard cock coherence in our training. 118 00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:32,720 It allows us to go so much deeper into the experience and 119 00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:39,560 really amplify the sensations, the pleasure, the the love. 120 00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:44,120 Essentially it's it's taught in the Tao that love amplifies sex, 121 00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:48,160 then sex amplifies love. You know, these are like sexual 122 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:52,960 energy is an accelerant. So it's going to basically be 123 00:07:52,960 --> 00:07:55,160 like gasoline poured onto a fire. 124 00:07:55,160 --> 00:07:58,880 And whether that fire is contained in a committed 125 00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:04,720 relationship with self and or partner and in a sacred way, or 126 00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:08,640 whether it's just left to kind of run in a chaotic way. 127 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:11,280 And wherever, you know, the desire wants to take it. 128 00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,600 It can be the difference between cooking a meal in a house or 129 00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:19,800 burning the house down, right? So it's just like a, a fuel. 130 00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:26,080 And I find, you know, through relationship, through the, I 131 00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:29,080 mean, in some ways, in some capacity, the relationship of 132 00:08:29,400 --> 00:08:32,240 relationships of everyone in my life, including you as my 133 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:35,159 brother and the brothers in the community that, you know, we 134 00:08:35,159 --> 00:08:40,679 train together in these ways. That's one level of support with 135 00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:45,640 me learning to contain myself more and be witnessed and 136 00:08:45,640 --> 00:08:51,360 supported, directing my sexual fire with intention and 137 00:08:51,360 --> 00:08:55,000 consciousness. But my partner, you know, she's, 138 00:08:55,280 --> 00:08:58,360 she's right in the middle of it. And of course, the most intimate 139 00:08:58,360 --> 00:09:06,880 way, the sexual act itself and continuing to allow her to be my 140 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:12,120 sacred mirror, you know, as, as it's understood, continuing to 141 00:09:12,120 --> 00:09:17,200 allow her body's reactions to my level of presence and attunement 142 00:09:17,680 --> 00:09:22,920 and leadership to my integrity, to, you know, how I show up and 143 00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:27,040 how true I am to my word. You know, her being able to 144 00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:33,320 trust me is the direct correlation to the depth of the 145 00:09:33,320 --> 00:09:38,960 sexual experience, the depth of the, the love and the the divine 146 00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:43,560 union that can occur in partnership, which is ultimately 147 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:48,040 just, you know, to me, a reflection back of how I'm 148 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:58,000 showing up for myself as well. Yeah, a lot of different pieces 149 00:09:58,000 --> 00:10:00,040 of wisdom threads to pull on in there. 150 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:03,800 I, I also want to circle back to something you shared a little 151 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:07,160 earlier and double click on it because kind of glazed over it 152 00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:10,160 quickly, but it feels really important and relevant to me in 153 00:10:10,160 --> 00:10:12,800 this situation. You mentioned that you and your 154 00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:19,720 partner have been making love prior to this, prior to the 155 00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:22,600 experience this morning that you're speaking to and, and you 156 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:25,920 were choosing to hold your seat during those prior lovemaking 157 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:29,000 sessions. And so as you, as you did 158 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,800 mention that sexual energy and that love, that heart centered 159 00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:36,360 sexual energy was being cultivated and built up 160 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:40,800 throughout the days or the week or more leading up to this. 161 00:10:41,280 --> 00:10:46,040 And then in this particular instant, in, in this particular 162 00:10:46,040 --> 00:10:48,880 experience, this morning, you did have an ejaculation, but 163 00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:52,080 there were previous lovemaking sessions where you chose not to. 164 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:57,000 And you know, one of the, the Daoists have many formulas for, 165 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:01,680 for many different aspects of, of life and, and vitality. 166 00:11:01,680 --> 00:11:05,760 And when it comes to semen retention or intention, there's 167 00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,240 many different formulas for the lengths of time between a 168 00:11:09,240 --> 00:11:13,880 healthy generative release. And that changes based on the 169 00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:16,720 seasons. It changes based on our age and 170 00:11:16,720 --> 00:11:21,680 our individual constitution. And it also changes based on how 171 00:11:21,680 --> 00:11:25,040 many times we've made love because there's an understanding 172 00:11:25,040 --> 00:11:27,640 that there's an immense amount of life force energy that's 173 00:11:27,640 --> 00:11:32,840 cultivated and contained when we Make Love without an ejaculation 174 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:35,760 as men. And so, yeah, something that I 175 00:11:35,760 --> 00:11:39,040 heard that feels important to speak to is like, there were 176 00:11:39,040 --> 00:11:42,520 previous lovemaking sessions where you didn't have an 177 00:11:42,520 --> 00:11:45,600 ejaculation. And so that cup was filling, 178 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:48,240 filling, filling. And then, you know, in that 179 00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:53,040 specific formula that I'm that I'm thinking of, it said that, 180 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:56,880 you know, once every three to five times lovemaking can be a 181 00:11:56,880 --> 00:11:59,200 healthy, sustainable release period. 182 00:12:00,760 --> 00:12:06,160 And I, I find in my own personal practice that, yeah, it that 183 00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:11,000 those love making sessions amplify and build up that sexual 184 00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:17,160 energy in really potent ways. And it's a matter of time where 185 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:21,360 eventually it is time to release and, and it can be very 186 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:24,400 generative and, and healthy still because there's been so 187 00:12:24,400 --> 00:12:31,320 much energy cultivated already. Yeah, Yeah. 188 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:34,280 Well said, man. I and I know you and your 189 00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:37,840 partner of what, five years and you guys have a very deep 190 00:12:38,240 --> 00:12:41,920 practice in that. And I'd be curious to hear a 191 00:12:41,920 --> 00:12:45,200 little more, you know, for you to share as well with anyone 192 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,120 listening in. I know you have like a, a 193 00:12:47,480 --> 00:12:52,320 calendar you track your lovemaking in, you track your 194 00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:56,360 releases in and just your sex lab as you call it. 195 00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:59,760 I'd love to hear any shares you may have around, you know, how 196 00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:04,160 you approach ejaculation and you know, this heart alignment and 197 00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:09,560 continuing to navigate that harmonious period of of 198 00:13:09,560 --> 00:13:12,480 ejaculation versus, you know, building up the energy. 199 00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:18,160 Yeah. So that, that calendar, it's a 200 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:20,560 paper calendar on the wall in the bedroom. 201 00:13:20,560 --> 00:13:23,160 And I've, I've had that going for years now. 202 00:13:23,640 --> 00:13:27,280 I have my digital calendar on my phone that keeps all of my work 203 00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:32,720 and personal life, you know, responsibilities and, and 204 00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,040 appointments in order. And then the one in the bedroom 205 00:13:35,040 --> 00:13:38,360 is just for the bedroom. And so, yeah, I found it really 206 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:42,960 helpful to track lovemaking sessions, releases. 207 00:13:43,120 --> 00:13:46,760 I like to have it as as a reference point for my own 208 00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:49,680 internal energy and for even the connection with my partner. 209 00:13:49,680 --> 00:13:51,920 If I can look at the calendar and see, oh, actually, you know 210 00:13:51,920 --> 00:13:55,080 what, we haven't been making love with the frequency that we 211 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:58,680 normally would, then it's a good reminder to create some space 212 00:13:58,680 --> 00:14:01,440 for that. I can find it. 213 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:09,520 It certainly happens sometimes where life gets so full and, 214 00:14:10,160 --> 00:14:13,520 and, and even though the connection can be really strong 215 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:18,320 between myself and my partner, we might go a longer period 216 00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,600 without lovemaking. And so to have that visual 217 00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,480 representation, I can just quickly look at that and 218 00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,760 realize, oh, you know what, it's time to create some space to 219 00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:27,560 connect. And yeah, I would of course 220 00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:30,240 really love that. And, and so would she. 221 00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:36,760 And there's, you know, in, in Daoist practices and the, it's 222 00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:41,320 call it the Dao of love and sex and even in traditional Chinese 223 00:14:41,320 --> 00:14:45,480 medicine, frequent lovemaking when it's practiced in a 224 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:49,360 sustainable, generative way, when the man is withholding his 225 00:14:49,360 --> 00:14:52,920 seed the majority of the time and when it's really connected 226 00:14:52,920 --> 00:14:58,840 to the heart, there's so much generative energy and life force 227 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:01,600 and vitality that comes from regular lovemaking. 228 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:05,840 And I think for any relationship, that energy and 229 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:12,400 that the positive effects and impacts of frequent heart 230 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:16,520 centered, sustainable and generative lovemaking is, is a 231 00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:20,920 crucial ingredient in any long term committed partnership. 232 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:25,000 And so for me, having that calendar is, is a reference 233 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:28,160 point for where am I at in my relationship. 234 00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,640 It's a reference point for where am I at in my own internal 235 00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:38,000 energy and to speak to your question about, you know, what 236 00:15:38,000 --> 00:15:42,000 sort of things do I consider and take into account when planning 237 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:46,440 or choosing my releases? It's it's multi fold fold. 238 00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:49,840 I'm looking at the calendar to see, OK, what was the space 239 00:15:49,840 --> 00:15:53,920 between? Am I in my roughly general ideal 240 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:59,280 cadence, which is a, you know, a period of time between releases, 241 00:15:59,280 --> 00:16:01,800 but then that will change and fluctuate based on how 242 00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:05,160 frequently have I been making love during that period. 243 00:16:05,360 --> 00:16:08,640 What time of the year is it here in the northern latitudes, we're 244 00:16:08,640 --> 00:16:14,760 in fall and as the days get shorter and colder, it's more 245 00:16:14,760 --> 00:16:17,720 important to have a longer space between releases. 246 00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:21,200 You know, and we've had men in our program speak to compromised 247 00:16:21,200 --> 00:16:25,160 immune system and noticing like two men recently in our program 248 00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:29,600 mentioned like, oh, I had a release and then right 249 00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:33,320 afterwards I got sick. That's interesting. 250 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:36,120 And the Taoist speak to this very plainly and clearly that 251 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:40,240 during winter it's important to wait much longer between 252 00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:43,360 releases. So there's, there's many 253 00:16:43,360 --> 00:16:45,840 different factors that come in and then aligning with my 254 00:16:45,840 --> 00:16:50,960 partner's menstrual cycle, which aligns me to the natural cycles 255 00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:55,240 of the moon inherently is another way that I that I bring 256 00:16:55,600 --> 00:16:57,840 another layer of consideration in. 257 00:16:58,440 --> 00:17:01,000 And then the last piece I'll speak to that's, that's pretty 258 00:17:01,000 --> 00:17:05,359 important for me is where do I have big commitments in my life? 259 00:17:05,359 --> 00:17:09,280 Where am I stepping into a facilitation role or guiding or 260 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:12,760 leading a space where I need to be at my fullest? 261 00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:15,359 Full energy, full focus, full power. 262 00:17:15,880 --> 00:17:20,160 And then also considering those important dates and ensuring 263 00:17:20,160 --> 00:17:23,480 that I'm having a sufficient period of time to build up and 264 00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:27,079 cultivate that life force energy before I step into a role where 265 00:17:27,079 --> 00:17:30,000 I'm going to be conducting or or holding space and energy in a 266 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:35,680 significant way. Yeah, that's so well said. 267 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,480 You know, in anyone who's listening, like you can look up, 268 00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:42,120 you can Google this, like, you know, fighters will not 269 00:17:42,120 --> 00:17:46,200 ejaculate for days or sometimes weeks before a fight. 270 00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:50,000 Yeah, there's, you find a lot of the stuff in the sort of the 271 00:17:50,000 --> 00:17:55,400 niche biohacking space for sure. But yeah, I definitely agree 272 00:17:55,400 --> 00:18:00,120 with all of those. And I think sometimes there's 273 00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:02,480 there's like a lack of discussion around this. 274 00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:05,240 It's kind of like this, you know, the semen retention space. 275 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:07,680 And you know how I first discovered this and perhaps you 276 00:18:07,680 --> 00:18:10,240 did. And I think a lot of us, if you 277 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:13,080 start diving into this world, there's a lot of repression 278 00:18:13,080 --> 00:18:17,000 actually in the beginning of, of our, of our journey. 279 00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:20,120 And initially that's like the very young, the very masculine 280 00:18:20,120 --> 00:18:22,560 approach that many of us have been hardwired into. 281 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:26,760 And you know, what we shoved down actually, though, is we're, 282 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:30,320 we're either numbing our sexuality or we're building up 283 00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:32,160 that energy like a pressure cooker. 284 00:18:32,840 --> 00:18:34,200 And that can get really uncomfortable. 285 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:37,520 And, you know, especially when we're talking about having sex 286 00:18:37,520 --> 00:18:41,080 frequently without ejaculation. Like for anyone who's new to 287 00:18:41,080 --> 00:18:43,880 this, they, you know, of course it'd be like, wow, that sounds 288 00:18:43,880 --> 00:18:46,320 really uncomfortable. Like that would give me blue 289 00:18:46,320 --> 00:18:49,160 balls. Can you speak a little bit to 290 00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:53,000 that, Hawks? Yeah, I would love to because 291 00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,960 this was just coming up for me as you were referencing fighters 292 00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:59,200 and athletes that have learned through their own personal 293 00:18:59,200 --> 00:19:02,560 experience or maybe they were taught by someone that, hey, 294 00:19:02,560 --> 00:19:05,880 it's really important not to have an ejaculation leading up 295 00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:08,880 to a big fight or a big athletic performance. 296 00:19:09,200 --> 00:19:15,360 And I've heard or I've read about athletes who would say 297 00:19:15,360 --> 00:19:18,880 like, I'm not, I don't see my partner, like I don't see my 298 00:19:18,880 --> 00:19:23,320 girlfriend or I don't have sex the week or weeks leading up to 299 00:19:23,360 --> 00:19:27,360 the event because I don't want to have that ejaculation. 300 00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:32,120 And to me, like I, I see that I'm like, OK, yeah, they're 301 00:19:32,120 --> 00:19:34,320 understanding part of the equation here. 302 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:39,520 And the part of the equation that is often, I think, from my 303 00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:43,680 experience and perception, misunderstood or misinterpreted 304 00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:49,200 in our culture is that no, it's not that sex is bad. 305 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:54,680 It's not that sex depletes us. It's that for so many people in 306 00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:58,360 our culture, for men at least, sex is equated with an 307 00:19:58,360 --> 00:20:00,520 ejaculation. They're one in the same. 308 00:20:01,600 --> 00:20:05,440 But when we can learn to withhold our seed, last as long 309 00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:09,200 as we want, have an amazing lovemaking session and not have 310 00:20:09,200 --> 00:20:13,520 an ejaculation but still feel really fulfilled in that, then 311 00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:16,520 we'd no longer need to say like, oh, I'm not going to have sex 312 00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:19,360 leading up to this game or this fight or this big event. 313 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:23,520 It's like actually, I look at it as like, where can I createspace 314 00:20:23,520 --> 00:20:25,880 to have a really potent lovemaking session with my 315 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:30,320 partner before that? And I'm careful not to have an 316 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:32,960 ejaculation during that lovemaking session, but we can 317 00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:34,960 cultivate all this love and this energy. 318 00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:39,480 And then I get to take that with me into that next event or 319 00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:41,560 experience or fight or whatever it is. 320 00:20:41,880 --> 00:20:48,480 And so the, the process as you were speaking to getting to a 321 00:20:48,480 --> 00:20:51,120 place where we're actually really comfortable, fully 322 00:20:51,120 --> 00:20:56,440 content and actually like choosing to have a non 323 00:20:56,440 --> 00:21:00,720 ejaculatory sex, it is a process and it requires training. 324 00:21:00,720 --> 00:21:04,200 It's, it's a martial arts of kinds where it requires 325 00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:06,840 commitment, it requires continued practice. 326 00:21:07,880 --> 00:21:11,480 But it is so possible. And I know for myself and for 327 00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:16,200 everyone else that I've talked to who's in this way of being, 328 00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:21,880 it's like it becomes the choice. It becomes like, Oh no, I'm, I 329 00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:26,800 want to not have an ejaculation because it feels so good. 330 00:21:26,800 --> 00:21:29,680 And I've and I can still experience immense amounts of 331 00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:33,480 pleasure and connection and deep fulfillment in that lovemaking 332 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:37,440 session. And I feel supercharged up, 333 00:21:37,640 --> 00:21:42,400 super LED up like a superhuman. The days that the hours, the 334 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:45,120 minutes, the days, the weeks following that. 335 00:21:45,240 --> 00:21:50,880 And so parsing that apart is so important because as I was 336 00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:55,320 speaking to before, having frequent sex is part of a 337 00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,720 healthy diet. As I see it, it's part of a 338 00:21:57,720 --> 00:22:01,320 healthy, vital lifestyle and part of a healthy, vital 339 00:22:01,320 --> 00:22:04,240 relationship. So if we're repressing sex 340 00:22:04,240 --> 00:22:08,080 because there's a fear of, but if I ejaculate, I'm going to 341 00:22:08,080 --> 00:22:10,200 lose all this energy. So I'm going to push that. 342 00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:13,120 I'm going to repress that, push my partner away. 343 00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:18,640 That's going to lead to actually other challenges in life and in 344 00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:22,360 relationship by ignoring that innate desire within us to 345 00:22:22,360 --> 00:22:25,600 connect, to be in that union of Shiva and Shakti, yen and Yang, 346 00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:28,720 man and woman, or just two partners who deeply love each 347 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:33,480 other. And so getting to that place 348 00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:39,000 where it's no longer a choice of sex or no sex, it's a choice of 349 00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:43,800 sex, sex with ejaculation, sex without ejaculation or no sex, 350 00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,640 then I'm going to choose the sex without ejaculation most of the 351 00:22:46,640 --> 00:22:47,120 time. Yeah. 352 00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,720 Yeah, that's it. That's it. 353 00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:58,120 It's, it is a process to switch, you know, over into this new way 354 00:22:58,120 --> 00:23:00,480 of like we say, it's sexual software updates. 355 00:23:00,600 --> 00:23:02,600 You know, I could, I wouldn't have believed it. 356 00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:05,760 You know, you talked to me back in my, my 20s or my teens, you 357 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:09,880 know, I was so addicted to ejaculation, not knowing what 358 00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:14,320 was possible, you know, beyond this, the, the quick dopamine 359 00:23:14,320 --> 00:23:17,520 hit of that actually, when you build up this energy, the 360 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:21,120 sustained like that delayed gratification and the, the 361 00:23:21,120 --> 00:23:24,960 subtle senses that start to come online and all the other side 362 00:23:24,960 --> 00:23:29,000 effects that we've mentioned. It really is a game changer when 363 00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,360 we can bring it to the bedroom. And as we speak to a lot, you 364 00:23:32,360 --> 00:23:36,760 know, in the training, it shifts the entire dynamic in the 365 00:23:36,760 --> 00:23:40,360 bedroom. Like many women, you know, met 366 00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:43,400 every man and woman for the most part has been programmed by 367 00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:46,080 porn. And most of us are just re 368 00:23:46,080 --> 00:23:49,400 enacting porn scenes in the bedroom and not realizing that 369 00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:52,440 that's what we're doing. But that's how we learned how to 370 00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:55,520 do the thing. We're really being honest. 371 00:23:55,760 --> 00:24:00,160 We're really looking at it. And when a woman enters a space 372 00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:05,680 with a man who does not have the objective of ejaculating can be 373 00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:07,960 triggering for some women, 'cause then, you know, it's like 374 00:24:08,040 --> 00:24:09,840 anxiety that they don't know what to do. 375 00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:12,120 They don't know how to perform if he doesn't ejaculate. 376 00:24:12,120 --> 00:24:16,240 But once they get over that and once everyone just sort of rests 377 00:24:16,240 --> 00:24:22,000 in the exploration, we we shift the entire dynamic into just how 378 00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:26,360 deep can we go into her pleasure and her pleasure, the female 379 00:24:26,360 --> 00:24:31,160 orgasm is infinite and so multi layered and so multi textured 380 00:24:31,160 --> 00:24:33,640 and so is ours. We come to find as we go deeper 381 00:24:33,640 --> 00:24:37,360 in there. But when we can learn to hold 382 00:24:37,360 --> 00:24:39,880 this and make it about her pleasure like that is our 383 00:24:39,880 --> 00:24:44,800 greatest pleasure has been actually and when we can last as 384 00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:49,520 long as we want in the bedroom, you know, we can go hours into 385 00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:53,800 making love with our partner. It's like, that is the most epic 386 00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,520 lovemaking you could imagine. And most women have never 387 00:24:56,520 --> 00:24:59,320 encountered men who have that capacity. 388 00:25:00,160 --> 00:25:02,400 And most men and women don't realize that that's even 389 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,080 possible. Again, because of the the porn 390 00:25:05,080 --> 00:25:08,880 conditioning, fixating on ejaculation, when actually when 391 00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:12,000 as soon as you ejaculate, the energy's gone, it dissipates. 392 00:25:12,640 --> 00:25:15,520 There's the refractory period and we we want to like roll over 393 00:25:15,520 --> 00:25:18,560 and go to sleep. So yeah, the, the delayed 394 00:25:18,560 --> 00:25:22,680 gratification, the rewiring, all of all of this is a game 395 00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:24,560 changer. And you got to experience it 396 00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:27,160 first hand to know it, that's for sure. 397 00:25:27,160 --> 00:25:30,680 And that's exactly like what we're all about here. 398 00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,120 I mean, we can talk about this stuff all the time. 399 00:25:33,120 --> 00:25:35,320 And, you know, there's a lot of, there's information out there 400 00:25:35,320 --> 00:25:36,760 and there's books and all the rest. 401 00:25:36,760 --> 00:25:41,480 But you know, what we do in our training programs is connect men 402 00:25:41,480 --> 00:25:45,320 with that ability first hand with them to experience that 403 00:25:45,320 --> 00:25:49,040 first hand so that they don't need to read anything else about 404 00:25:49,040 --> 00:25:50,920 it. You know, once you've started 405 00:25:50,920 --> 00:25:54,840 tasting that within yourself, that capacity, it's just like 406 00:25:54,840 --> 00:25:58,640 lighting a fire inside. And ultimately it becomes your 407 00:25:58,640 --> 00:26:01,800 greatest passion. You know, it becomes your rocket 408 00:26:01,800 --> 00:26:04,640 fuel in life. And it's it's your fulfillment. 409 00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:07,920 And there's so many men who've come through our training 410 00:26:07,920 --> 00:26:10,440 programs and guys who are in it right now, you know, and just 411 00:26:10,440 --> 00:26:14,720 shout out to all those guys. And you know, we're we're here 412 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:18,040 to basically support brothers in this. 413 00:26:18,800 --> 00:26:22,360 And ultimately, like we have there's many different ways up 414 00:26:22,360 --> 00:26:25,360 the mountain. As we say, we have our signature 415 00:26:25,360 --> 00:26:30,800 process, our own recipe, if you will, of the most condensed, 416 00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:35,120 distilled, potent practices that you and I have found as two 417 00:26:35,120 --> 00:26:37,160 separate brothers coming into this space. 418 00:26:37,240 --> 00:26:40,960 I don't know anyone else who has this level of brotherhood and 419 00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:44,320 men's work and community that we do at MSM. 420 00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:48,800 But, you know, having this protocol, having this, you know, 421 00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:53,640 modular, like step by step process to guide men into 422 00:26:53,640 --> 00:26:57,520 awakening one level at a time, like their capacity for this and 423 00:26:57,520 --> 00:27:00,840 the consistent daily accountability support and all 424 00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,120 the other pieces that weekly calls that we do in the 425 00:27:03,120 --> 00:27:04,840 one-on-one for guys that want that. 426 00:27:05,920 --> 00:27:08,840 Ultimately, like we are here to just connect you with this 427 00:27:08,840 --> 00:27:12,920 ability first hand to put you on the, the quantum, you know, 428 00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:14,760 timeline. Like you can figure it out on 429 00:27:14,760 --> 00:27:17,680 your on our own. Like that's what we did each of 430 00:27:17,680 --> 00:27:19,840 us for years, you know, for decades. 431 00:27:20,760 --> 00:27:24,480 But it's often times it's greatly accelerated when you can 432 00:27:24,480 --> 00:27:27,440 have something that's much more distilled and you don't have to 433 00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:31,760 try out every single of the, you know, hundreds of practices and 434 00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:34,320 hundreds of books and, and all this stuff. 435 00:27:34,320 --> 00:27:37,960 So anyway, that's just guiding it back to the the first hand 436 00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,480 experience of it. The rewiring of it is, is 437 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:44,680 ultimately all that matters. Like applied knowledge is what's 438 00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,760 most potent more than anything. So. 439 00:27:47,880 --> 00:27:50,800 Yeah. And that so when you speak to 440 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:53,920 like what we're in service to is connecting men with that 441 00:27:53,920 --> 00:28:00,960 experience first hand, Could you speak to how it is that that we 442 00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:04,080 do that? Because I feel like that could 443 00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:05,880 be interpreted in many different ways. 444 00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:11,440 And so how is it that MSM as a brotherhood, as a community, so 445 00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,400 how do we support men in that first hand experience of these 446 00:28:15,400 --> 00:28:21,280 new ways of being? Yeah, well, there's a I'm trying 447 00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:25,680 to think of how I could make this the most succinct possible, 448 00:28:25,920 --> 00:28:29,040 as succinctly as possible. But as you mentioned earlier, 449 00:28:29,640 --> 00:28:32,640 this is a form of internal martial arts. 450 00:28:34,360 --> 00:28:37,800 It's in a way, it's like we said, it's updating our sexual 451 00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:40,960 software. It's rewiring neural pathways, 452 00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:43,840 it's rewiring nervous system, you know, autonomic nervous 453 00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:48,200 system responses to things like ejaculation, which if you notice 454 00:28:48,200 --> 00:28:50,880 is a it's a sympathetic nervous system response. 455 00:28:50,880 --> 00:28:56,240 It's a clenching, it's re patterning our brains, our 456 00:28:56,240 --> 00:29:03,400 nervous systems, our bodies into a new program of how we interact 457 00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:07,400 with sexuality. And this is done through many, 458 00:29:07,400 --> 00:29:11,040 many, you know, like I said, our our unique process that you have 459 00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:14,200 to, you know, experience it to really know it. 460 00:29:14,200 --> 00:29:18,400 But there's levels of practices that when practiced consistently 461 00:29:18,400 --> 00:29:22,960 over time, begin to awaken the subtle senses when it's combined 462 00:29:22,960 --> 00:29:26,240 with, you know, semen intention, as we talked about not 463 00:29:26,240 --> 00:29:30,760 ejaculating slowly, little by little, you begin to fill up 464 00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:34,600 that energy within you kind of like a bowl of water. 465 00:29:34,600 --> 00:29:37,800 You know, we patch all the leaks and then we start doing the 466 00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:40,120 practices. We start filling up the vessel. 467 00:29:40,440 --> 00:29:44,400 Then suddenly that battery bank as we spoke to starts to fill up 468 00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:45,960 starts. That's when guys really start 469 00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:48,840 noticing. Usually it's by week four, week 470 00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:51,160 five, week 6. They're just like, holy shit, 471 00:29:51,840 --> 00:29:53,600 like how was I never taught this? 472 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:58,400 Like what you know, and building up that energy from the inside 473 00:29:58,400 --> 00:30:00,600 out. We have solo cultivation 474 00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:02,880 practices. We start guys often, even if 475 00:30:02,880 --> 00:30:07,280 they're in relationship, building up the the chi within 476 00:30:07,280 --> 00:30:11,560 them, the sexual energy, and then from there we move 477 00:30:11,560 --> 00:30:13,720 outwards. Once we're coming from an 478 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:17,560 overflowing cup, as we spoke to, then we can show up in a 479 00:30:17,560 --> 00:30:20,200 relationship in abundance rather than scarcity. 480 00:30:20,200 --> 00:30:24,920 Rather than trying to take or extract or need sexual pleasure 481 00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:28,960 or fulfillment from a partner, we actually have an abundance of 482 00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:32,800 it 'cause we're learning how to generate it within and from that 483 00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:34,400 place. Then we can step into 484 00:30:34,400 --> 00:30:38,360 relationship and a lot of our training goes into a bunch of, 485 00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:41,960 you know, tons of teachings and tools and practices for, for 486 00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:46,280 building polarity and deepening in attunement and practices with 487 00:30:46,280 --> 00:30:48,360 partners. So that's kind of the outline as 488 00:30:48,360 --> 00:30:51,320 I would describe it. Yeah, yeah. 489 00:30:51,320 --> 00:30:58,000 Thanks for that. I want to point out that this is 490 00:30:58,000 --> 00:31:03,080 work that we as men do on our own. 491 00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:08,000 Ultimately, you know, it's like you and I are here to provide 492 00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:12,800 the space, provide the container to ensure to the best of our 493 00:31:12,800 --> 00:31:15,000 ability that there is implementation. 494 00:31:17,240 --> 00:31:20,320 And we can't do it for you and we're not doing it for you. 495 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:24,640 We're providing the community, the brotherhood and through that 496 00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:27,080 brotherhood, through our accountability containers and 497 00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:32,520 through our groups, our group cohorts, we're creating the, the 498 00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:35,680 container, we're creating the structure to ensure that each 499 00:31:35,680 --> 00:31:39,520 man is implementing to the best of his ability, the tools and 500 00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:41,440 the practices. Like you spoke to solo 501 00:31:41,440 --> 00:31:46,000 cultivation being one of the, one of the primary foundational 502 00:31:46,000 --> 00:31:48,880 practices. And, and that as it says his 503 00:31:48,880 --> 00:31:51,640 solo cultivation, we can't do it for you. 504 00:31:51,640 --> 00:31:56,240 We're not doing it together. You're doing it on your own and 505 00:31:56,240 --> 00:32:00,400 we're providing the framework. So it's crystal clear, these are 506 00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:03,320 the steps, this is the frequency, and this is the 507 00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:06,800 community that's going to hold me accountable to ensure that 508 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:10,360 I'm doing what I came here to do and receiving the results that I 509 00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:14,000 came here to achieve. And I feel called to just 510 00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:17,640 sprinkle a little something in for any listeners here around 511 00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:20,400 that solo cultivation practice, something that you could do for 512 00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:24,040 yourself at home. I won't go through in depth the 513 00:32:24,040 --> 00:32:27,920 process because it would take a whole podcast, while it takes, 514 00:32:28,000 --> 00:32:32,800 you know, a whole lecture series and series of practice videos to 515 00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:38,320 really instill that. But just as a way for any man 516 00:32:38,320 --> 00:32:42,240 out there to start to repattern and reframe your relationship 517 00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:47,600 with your own sex, let go of any external stimulus. 518 00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:50,320 First and foremost. If you're using pornography, if 519 00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:55,120 you're using any form of external images, let that go 520 00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:58,280 because this is a process of coming into our self, coming 521 00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:01,920 into our own body, coming into the sensations alive within our 522 00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:03,480 own body. That's part of the process of 523 00:33:03,480 --> 00:33:06,640 attuning to the subtle energies and the subtle sensations which 524 00:33:06,960 --> 00:33:10,760 eventually over time, allow us to open up to whole new pathways 525 00:33:10,760 --> 00:33:15,920 of pleasure in our own body. And then going into a practice 526 00:33:15,920 --> 00:33:21,240 where you're in a self love, a self pleasure routine, but 527 00:33:21,240 --> 00:33:24,880 letting go of whatever you think masturbation is and trying 528 00:33:24,880 --> 00:33:29,000 something completely new. Moving slowly, being with your 529 00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:32,120 breath and being in your body, always coming back into the body 530 00:33:32,120 --> 00:33:35,200 in those sensations. And then as you're starting out, 531 00:33:35,640 --> 00:33:39,120 have a limit for how much arousal you're going to build in 532 00:33:39,120 --> 00:33:40,880 your system. Because one of the things that's 533 00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:44,160 also different about this self love or self pleasure practice 534 00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:46,440 is we're not finishing with ejaculation. 535 00:33:47,360 --> 00:33:50,320 And that's why we're starting to really rewrite and reprogram 536 00:33:50,320 --> 00:33:54,360 this bodily response that arousal means ejaculation is 537 00:33:54,360 --> 00:33:57,400 coming. And so we encourage you to stay 538 00:33:57,400 --> 00:34:05,200 within 70% if your range of arousal is zero to 190% or 95%. 539 00:34:05,360 --> 00:34:08,960 Arousal is that point of no return where you're now going 540 00:34:08,960 --> 00:34:12,080 into an automated response in your body that leads to 541 00:34:12,080 --> 00:34:15,000 ejaculation. Stay well back from that. 542 00:34:15,440 --> 00:34:18,920 Build up arousal, build pleasure in your body, but let it come to 543 00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:24,679 a point around 70% and then soften, slow down, let go, bring 544 00:34:24,679 --> 00:34:27,520 touch and attention to other parts of your body and let that 545 00:34:27,520 --> 00:34:30,400 arousal come back down, maybe to 30%. 546 00:34:30,639 --> 00:34:33,639 And then build yourself up again slowly and intentionally. 547 00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:39,120 And over time, through being in a practice and relationship with 548 00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:41,800 our own sex in that way, we'll be able to bring it into the 549 00:34:41,800 --> 00:34:45,199 bedroom and we'll be able to come more and more aware of what 550 00:34:45,199 --> 00:34:48,600 are the sensations in my body, What is my breath doing, How is 551 00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:51,000 it changing as I'm increasing in arousal? 552 00:34:51,000 --> 00:34:54,239 And then where can I start to bring that awareness in and make 553 00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:57,480 a change to how I'm breathing or how I'm moving? 554 00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:01,160 And then as we master that within ourselves, we're then 555 00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:02,720 able to bring it into partnership. 556 00:35:02,720 --> 00:35:05,560 And it does get more complicated when we bring it into 557 00:35:05,560 --> 00:35:07,360 partnership. And that's why it's important to 558 00:35:07,360 --> 00:35:10,640 work with just ourself when we're starting out because it's 559 00:35:10,640 --> 00:35:15,080 only our energy, it's only our touch and our body that we're 560 00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:19,000 taking into consideration and that we're and that's factoring 561 00:35:19,000 --> 00:35:20,280 in. But when we bring it into 562 00:35:20,280 --> 00:35:24,520 partnership, there's another body, another energy, and likely 563 00:35:24,800 --> 00:35:28,560 a greatly amplified level of arousal and stimulation present. 564 00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:32,600 So that's just one little sprinkle, something that anyone 565 00:35:32,600 --> 00:35:35,920 could take away from this call and start to put into practice 566 00:35:35,920 --> 00:35:38,560 in your own life. And and of course, as I spoke 567 00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:42,480 to, we're here as a community and brotherhood to ensure that 568 00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:47,240 you're not just doing this once you're doing it the amount of 569 00:35:47,240 --> 00:35:50,440 times, the frequency of the cadence and in the right 570 00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:54,000 procedure, procedure that's going to allow the 571 00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:58,600 implementation required for you to really achieve what you're 572 00:35:58,600 --> 00:36:02,480 what you might be desiring. Yeah. 573 00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:04,680 Anything you want to add into that? 574 00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:08,000 Yeah, just at the end of the day, there's, we say that 575 00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:09,760 there's, you know, there's working out. 576 00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:13,440 It's like going to the gym and then there's working in, and 577 00:36:13,440 --> 00:36:17,600 this is a working in practice. This is getting internal martial 578 00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,520 arts. So you got to do the wraps. 579 00:36:19,520 --> 00:36:21,040 There's just no way getting around it. 580 00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:24,720 Like, you know, I, I know I spent a long time scouring 581 00:36:24,720 --> 00:36:27,120 books, scouring the Internet, reading, trying to just 582 00:36:27,120 --> 00:36:30,880 consuming all this information. But ultimately, that can be a 583 00:36:30,880 --> 00:36:35,360 huge saboteur to actually implementing it, you know, and 584 00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:38,680 for many of us that that's the hardest thing to do actually is 585 00:36:38,680 --> 00:36:42,880 like consistent daily reps. And that is the only way that 586 00:36:42,880 --> 00:36:46,120 you are going to unlock your ability as a man to separate 587 00:36:46,120 --> 00:36:50,600 orgasm and ejaculation, you know, and start to build up this 588 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:52,320 energy. It's not consuming more 589 00:36:52,320 --> 00:36:54,560 information. So just that's just one last, 590 00:36:54,600 --> 00:36:57,080 last thing I'll throw out there 'cause we live in an age of 591 00:36:57,080 --> 00:37:01,600 information overload. Ultimately, it's, it's what you 592 00:37:01,600 --> 00:37:04,760 put into practice that counts. And that's what we call 593 00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:06,920 embodiment, embodying the practice. 594 00:37:06,920 --> 00:37:10,440 And that's when knowledge becomes wisdom and it becomes 595 00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:13,000 your own. And we say a lot of times and 596 00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:17,360 we, we see in our community like tell guys all the time, like 597 00:37:17,360 --> 00:37:19,640 what's awakening in you is awakening in me, bro. 598 00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:23,040 Like there's no gurus here. Like there's, you know, we got 599 00:37:23,040 --> 00:37:24,800 codes cause we've come a long way. 600 00:37:25,280 --> 00:37:28,040 And I know you and I both. And every brother who comes 601 00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:34,800 through this though, has his own unique blueprint and codes like 602 00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:37,840 that awaken. He has his own wisdom that comes 603 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,480 through him as he begins to practice this stuff. 604 00:37:40,480 --> 00:37:44,080 And that's when actually the the brotherhood truly becomes a 605 00:37:44,080 --> 00:37:47,480 collective, you know, and that's some of the guys who graduate 606 00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:50,720 and move deeper in with us. Like it becomes more of a 607 00:37:50,720 --> 00:37:55,200 council of brothers who are all researching what this is, you 608 00:37:55,200 --> 00:37:59,480 know, and it's a potent path to share with other brothers. 609 00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:02,720 So yeah, if you're feeling called to any of this, if any of 610 00:38:02,720 --> 00:38:05,480 this resonates with you, yeah, reach out to us. 611 00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:07,560 You know, fill out an application on our website. 612 00:38:07,560 --> 00:38:10,880 We have another group training starting December 1st. 613 00:38:11,040 --> 00:38:15,240 Another six month group training and there's a seat for you at 614 00:38:15,240 --> 00:38:20,200 the table, brother. Yeah, yeah, it's such a it's 615 00:38:20,200 --> 00:38:23,880 such a privilege to be able to learn from every man that comes 616 00:38:23,880 --> 00:38:27,120 into our program because everyone's coming in with their 617 00:38:27,120 --> 00:38:30,120 own unique blueprint, their own unique experience and their own 618 00:38:30,360 --> 00:38:32,920 unique way of approaching the practices. 619 00:38:33,200 --> 00:38:36,200 And when we come back together on these group calls or in our 620 00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:39,480 one-on-one sessions, as you're saying, we get to receive the 621 00:38:39,480 --> 00:38:42,000 codes from the men who are putting these practices into 622 00:38:42,000 --> 00:38:44,040 work in their own life and in their own way. 623 00:38:44,360 --> 00:38:49,680 And we're constantly getting like receiving more and more 624 00:38:49,680 --> 00:38:52,200 data points, more and more information that allow us to 625 00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:56,600 continue to refine and refine as any practitioner who works with 626 00:38:56,600 --> 00:39:02,640 clients gets to experiences. We're constantly building this 627 00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:07,000 more expansive and comprehensive web of information and data 628 00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:10,680 points that allow us to continue to refine the process so that it 629 00:39:10,680 --> 00:39:16,600 can be the best it can be for for everyone and anyone. 630 00:39:18,280 --> 00:39:22,440 I want to, I want to circle back around to something we touched 631 00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:28,360 on briefly, Ben, that feels important as a little add on to 632 00:39:28,360 --> 00:39:33,000 this discussion we were having earlier about choosing to enter 633 00:39:33,000 --> 00:39:36,200 a love making session without an ejaculation. 634 00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:41,160 And you spoke to it about how many women as well will have a 635 00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:44,560 resistance to that initially. And this is a question I get 636 00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:48,560 from men all of the time. I'm sure you do as well of OK. 637 00:39:48,600 --> 00:39:52,080 I'm in a partnership and I feel like I've learned enough. 638 00:39:52,080 --> 00:39:56,400 I've, I've read the books, I've acquired the the knowledge that, 639 00:39:56,400 --> 00:40:00,280 yeah, it's going to serve me to not ejaculate every time I have 640 00:40:00,280 --> 00:40:04,000 sex. But my partner really loves it 641 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:07,160 when I do. It's affirming for her. 642 00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:11,760 It's enjoyable for her. What do I do if she has 643 00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:15,880 resistance? To me not ejaculating at the end 644 00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:21,560 of a love making session. Yeah, that's a, that's a really 645 00:40:21,560 --> 00:40:27,880 common one that comes up. Yeah, a lot of this is about re 646 00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:33,200 educating ourselves and our partners and the way we can 647 00:40:33,240 --> 00:40:37,440 frame it to her and contextualize it is key in this 648 00:40:37,440 --> 00:40:41,720 instance. I like to tell guys, you know, 649 00:40:41,720 --> 00:40:44,720 if if you think of it like playing a game, like tell your 650 00:40:44,720 --> 00:40:47,280 partner like I'm just think of it like a game. 651 00:40:47,280 --> 00:40:50,440 I just want to see how long I can last and how deep we can go 652 00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:53,080 into your pleasure. How does that sound? 653 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:56,640 You know, just that's one simple take. 654 00:40:57,280 --> 00:41:00,600 You can also educate your partner about like, you know, 655 00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:04,720 these techniques and practices and that there are benefits to 656 00:41:04,720 --> 00:41:06,520 this. Like my intention in this is 657 00:41:06,520 --> 00:41:12,800 actually to show up more fully for you, not just sexually, but 658 00:41:12,800 --> 00:41:17,080 in every area of our life. And this is going to support me 659 00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:22,880 in that, you know, and for some men, I think there can be almost 660 00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:25,000 like I, I've seen it in some of the guys that come through our 661 00:41:25,000 --> 00:41:27,840 training. Like it's a power dynamic issue 662 00:41:28,720 --> 00:41:31,560 at times. And it's like a a man 663 00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:37,120 reasserting his role as a leader in the bedroom. 664 00:41:37,400 --> 00:41:41,960 And I think sometimes women can feel threatened when they don't 665 00:41:41,960 --> 00:41:45,840 trust him. You know, there's other areas of 666 00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:48,480 his life where he's showing that he can't actually hold it. 667 00:41:48,640 --> 00:41:53,000 He can't hold it together like he can't hold her like he's not 668 00:41:53,000 --> 00:41:58,440 aware enough. And so I think demonstrating in 669 00:41:58,440 --> 00:42:02,240 other areas of your life that you are showing up in leadership 670 00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:05,960 with consciousness, you know, holding the energy, being 671 00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:09,520 present for her and being able to support her and her process. 672 00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:14,760 It can take a little time to re pattern relationships where 673 00:42:15,280 --> 00:42:22,000 women feel like an unconscious betrayal or absence of their 674 00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:24,320 partner or a lack of responsibility. 675 00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:29,520 And I find that there's usually a correlation with women who, in 676 00:42:29,520 --> 00:42:34,040 partnership, are resistant to a man practicing holding it or 677 00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:38,600 exploring her with, like, how he's been showing up. 678 00:42:39,080 --> 00:42:42,880 And conversely, it can also be her, you know, her tendencies to 679 00:42:42,880 --> 00:42:46,880 want to control everything unconsciously as well. 680 00:42:47,080 --> 00:42:51,600 So yeah. Yeah, yeah. 681 00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:57,440 That piece on power dynamics feels like like another branch 682 00:42:57,520 --> 00:43:01,000 of this on its own that as you were speaking to, is going to 683 00:43:01,640 --> 00:43:07,440 likely require some deeper work in building trust in the 684 00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:11,080 relationship. And so there's that. 685 00:43:11,120 --> 00:43:15,840 And then I also want to want to dive a little bit deeper into 686 00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:18,360 suppose it isn't a power dynamics thing. 687 00:43:18,600 --> 00:43:27,240 Suppose it's just the habituation of pleasure and 688 00:43:27,240 --> 00:43:32,520 enjoyment and fulfillment coming from the woman in receiving 689 00:43:32,520 --> 00:43:36,960 Herman's ejaculation feeling like yes, he's experienced 690 00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:38,920 pleasure here. That's affirming for me. 691 00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:42,120 And like there's and, and it's pleasure full, you know, 692 00:43:42,120 --> 00:43:45,560 especially if they're in a practice of mutual orgasm. 693 00:43:45,840 --> 00:43:48,600 And it can be like a really powerful thing to share that 694 00:43:48,600 --> 00:43:51,840 orgasmic experience with a partner as she's coming, he's 695 00:43:51,840 --> 00:43:55,160 coming. And, and supposing that some of 696 00:43:55,160 --> 00:44:00,360 those other sort of more edgy or just nuanced pieces around the 697 00:44:00,360 --> 00:44:03,960 power dynamics aren't at play. And it's just but I really enjoy 698 00:44:03,960 --> 00:44:08,880 it when you come. I want to speak to that and 699 00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:13,600 invite the curiosity, as you were saying, a re education or a 700 00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:15,640 deeper education. And I would look at this 701 00:44:15,640 --> 00:44:19,080 actually just from the man's opportunity to educate himself. 702 00:44:20,200 --> 00:44:23,480 You could inquire with your partner, what is it that you 703 00:44:23,480 --> 00:44:29,640 love about my ejaculation? What effect does that have on 704 00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:31,960 you? And then you might get some of 705 00:44:31,960 --> 00:44:35,840 these common responses like, well, it shows me that I have 706 00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:38,160 fulfilled you. It shows me that you've you are 707 00:44:38,160 --> 00:44:41,840 in deep pleasure. I love that experience of you 708 00:44:43,240 --> 00:44:48,760 being in this peak experience of pleasure and, and I enjoy it as 709 00:44:48,760 --> 00:44:51,160 well. It's, it feels fulfilling for me 710 00:44:51,160 --> 00:44:55,720 and it also helps me to achieve my orgasm and whatever that 711 00:44:55,920 --> 00:44:58,400 might be. It's these are more data points 712 00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:02,000 for us to then take in and see. OK. 713 00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:07,560 I wonder if I could affirm her in the same way that I'm 714 00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:10,280 experiencing immense pleasure and fulfillment here. 715 00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:14,200 What if it's just that until I come? 716 00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:17,200 And this is a pattern, too. We see in men all the time where 717 00:45:17,200 --> 00:45:20,320 it's like sex is happening. It's happening. 718 00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:24,240 He's, you know, fairly neutral, not making a lot of sound, not 719 00:45:24,240 --> 00:45:28,160 giving a lot of expression. And then there's an ejaculation. 720 00:45:28,160 --> 00:45:32,720 And it's this big thing that's like, OK, there's his pleasure. 721 00:45:34,520 --> 00:45:38,000 What if we could open up to the pleasure that's there in every 722 00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:41,480 moment of the lovemaking and come into a way that's authentic 723 00:45:41,720 --> 00:45:44,760 and grounded to express that to our partner, whether it's 724 00:45:44,760 --> 00:45:48,920 through words or we love to invite men to open up the voice 725 00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:52,960 and the sound a little more and express through your voice, 726 00:45:53,080 --> 00:45:57,040 whether it's words or sounds that like, wow, this feels 727 00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:59,920 amazing. I'm having such a good time 728 00:45:59,920 --> 00:46:03,000 here. I am loving this and I'm so 729 00:46:03,000 --> 00:46:06,520 fulfilled just in this moment. I don't actually need anything 730 00:46:06,520 --> 00:46:10,080 more. And I think for a lot of women, 731 00:46:10,080 --> 00:46:13,680 when they really start to experience and believe that that 732 00:46:13,680 --> 00:46:17,040 oh wow, he's actually enjoying every second of this lovemaking 733 00:46:17,040 --> 00:46:23,840 session so much. And it doesn't need to be any 734 00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:28,040 grand finale. He's really just genuinely 735 00:46:28,040 --> 00:46:30,280 loving being here with me in this way. 736 00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:33,480 And then at the end of the session as well to affirm like 737 00:46:33,480 --> 00:46:37,320 if I if if if you don't have an ejaculation to make sure you 738 00:46:37,320 --> 00:46:39,880 keep that connection strong with your partner and let her know 739 00:46:39,880 --> 00:46:41,600 like, wow, that was amazing baby. 740 00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:43,920 You were so sexy. That felt so good. 741 00:46:43,920 --> 00:46:45,760 I feel so fulfilled. Thank you. 742 00:46:45,760 --> 00:46:49,680 I'm feel filled up with this energy and now I get to take 743 00:46:49,680 --> 00:46:52,040 this into my day. I get to take this into work 744 00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:53,560 tomorrow. I get to take this into our 745 00:46:53,560 --> 00:46:58,600 family, into all of the areas of my life that are going to 746 00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:01,440 benefit from this energy that we've just cultivated. 747 00:47:01,440 --> 00:47:06,800 And over time, we can start to affirm those parts of her that 748 00:47:06,800 --> 00:47:11,880 want to, that want to feel like there's that level of 749 00:47:11,880 --> 00:47:17,320 fulfillment and enjoyment in you as a man and to understand that 750 00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:21,560 there are other ways to express that than just an ejaculatory 751 00:47:21,560 --> 00:47:26,520 response. And then another important piece 752 00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:33,120 is the woman's fulfillment. This is, I would say, the more 753 00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:36,040 important piece in this equation for me personally, I've 754 00:47:36,040 --> 00:47:38,600 experienced as you were speaking to, it's her pleasure is my 755 00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:41,080 pleasure. And actually what fulfills me 756 00:47:41,080 --> 00:47:45,920 the most is knowing that she received everything that she 757 00:47:45,920 --> 00:47:48,080 desired from the experience and more. 758 00:47:48,640 --> 00:47:54,600 And so there's also there can be a, a challenge for men starting 759 00:47:54,600 --> 00:48:00,000 out on this path of how do I stay within that, that those 760 00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:03,240 boundaries of my own arousal so that I'm not spilling over the 761 00:48:03,240 --> 00:48:08,120 edge while still bringing her to the depths of her potential for 762 00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:12,400 pleasure. And I love at this point, like 763 00:48:12,400 --> 00:48:17,280 early on in the exploration to really encourage men to double 764 00:48:17,280 --> 00:48:23,440 down or quadruple down on practices like cunnilingus as a 765 00:48:23,440 --> 00:48:27,200 way to build her energy, to build her arousal and pleasure 766 00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:29,760 up. That doesn't compromise our own 767 00:48:29,760 --> 00:48:33,680 stamina with our lingam, with our sexual stamina. 768 00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:37,360 And we can bring her to that place where she's experiencing 769 00:48:37,360 --> 00:48:39,120 waves of pleasure and fulfillment. 770 00:48:39,120 --> 00:48:43,840 And then if and when it comes to penetrative sex, she's already, 771 00:48:43,840 --> 00:48:47,360 her cup is already full and overflowing and might overflow 772 00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:51,360 again and again. And it doesn't require that same 773 00:48:52,200 --> 00:48:56,840 level of hesitancy of, oh, I, I don't want to go too hard here. 774 00:48:56,840 --> 00:49:00,160 I don't like, I don't want to push myself too far here because 775 00:49:00,240 --> 00:49:04,680 I'm not planning on having an an ejaculation while also 776 00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:10,360 understanding and honoring that she might require more than 777 00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:13,600 we're capable of early on in order for her to reach that 778 00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:16,000 level of fulfillment and pleasure that's also going to 779 00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:19,760 fill her cup. And so that's, yeah, it's, it's 780 00:49:19,760 --> 00:49:22,840 another really big topic that we could go into much more. 781 00:49:22,840 --> 00:49:26,000 But just to kind of sum that up, I would say get really curious 782 00:49:26,000 --> 00:49:30,840 about what it is that your partner enjoys about your 783 00:49:30,840 --> 00:49:35,880 ejaculation and then find other ways to meet those needs and 784 00:49:35,880 --> 00:49:37,720 desires. It's kind of like with any 785 00:49:37,720 --> 00:49:42,160 habitual pattern in our life looking at addiction or, or 786 00:49:42,160 --> 00:49:45,320 habits as, OK, well, these are here for a reason. 787 00:49:45,320 --> 00:49:48,480 They're fulfilling something within me or they're attempting 788 00:49:48,760 --> 00:49:51,480 to fulfill some desire or need within me. 789 00:49:51,720 --> 00:49:54,800 But is there another way that could actually be more 790 00:49:54,800 --> 00:49:59,600 generative where I could meet this, meet this part of me in a 791 00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:05,000 good way? So yeah, feeling, feeling ready 792 00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:09,080 to to wrap that up and I'd love to just turn it over to you. 793 00:50:09,920 --> 00:50:14,840 Based on what we've talked about today, topics we've delve into. 794 00:50:14,840 --> 00:50:17,640 Is there anything else that you want to speak to to round this 795 00:50:17,640 --> 00:50:22,440 out? Yeah, we've covered a lot today. 796 00:50:22,440 --> 00:50:24,560 It's been a great, great conversation. 797 00:50:24,560 --> 00:50:27,960 Hawks, appreciate you and appreciate all you listening in. 798 00:50:30,360 --> 00:50:35,360 I just would, again, highlight consistency doing the reps, you 799 00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:42,400 know, continuing to, yeah, just rewire this from the inside out, 800 00:50:42,400 --> 00:50:45,760 you know, one breath at a time, 1 moment at a time, one second 801 00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:47,960 at a time, celebrating those small wins. 802 00:50:48,680 --> 00:50:53,840 If you're new to this work, there's a normal phase of 803 00:50:53,840 --> 00:50:58,520 withdrawals from the dopamine. You know, it's a dopamine detox 804 00:50:58,520 --> 00:51:03,680 of ejaculations. And there's normal oscillation. 805 00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:06,800 We say in our training of, you know, if you're addicted to porn 806 00:51:06,800 --> 00:51:09,400 or you're addicted to ejaculation to like going back 807 00:51:09,400 --> 00:51:14,560 to that because often times it's helping us, you know, like a 808 00:51:14,560 --> 00:51:16,560 crutch. Like if you have a broken foot, 809 00:51:17,000 --> 00:51:20,040 you may need that crutch to lean on while your foot's broken. 810 00:51:20,040 --> 00:51:26,080 But as you start to heal and can start to put weight on it, you 811 00:51:26,080 --> 00:51:27,800 can gradually let that crutch go. 812 00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:30,920 So, you know, if you've been habitually using porn or 813 00:51:30,920 --> 00:51:33,680 habitually ejaculating, it's going to take time for your 814 00:51:33,680 --> 00:51:38,160 nervous system to rewire itself for your your neural pathways to 815 00:51:38,160 --> 00:51:42,680 be rebuilt through this work. So don't beat yourself up in the 816 00:51:42,680 --> 00:51:44,560 beginning. Really just focus on the small 817 00:51:44,560 --> 00:51:47,560 wins, hit that reset. You know, just like we talked 818 00:51:47,560 --> 00:51:50,080 about at the beginning of this call, like when I had my 819 00:51:50,080 --> 00:51:54,360 ejaculation in the past, again, it was a much bigger toll it 820 00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:58,400 would take on me, but I also would be beating myself up a lot 821 00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:00,560 of, you know, back then. And I think a lot of guys in the 822 00:52:00,560 --> 00:52:05,080 semen retention space are kind of in that like very rigid, sort 823 00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:08,640 of, yeah, non, it's not productive to feel like shit. 824 00:52:09,120 --> 00:52:11,720 It's not productive to guilt trip yourself. 825 00:52:12,280 --> 00:52:15,720 Just keep hitting that reset over and over and over again. 826 00:52:15,720 --> 00:52:18,560 And over time, like those little resets, you know, getting up 827 00:52:18,560 --> 00:52:21,360 again every time we fall down, that's what that's the actual 828 00:52:21,360 --> 00:52:23,840 work that's building the muscle. You're on the right track. 829 00:52:24,680 --> 00:52:31,160 And gradually, little by little, you'll notice the cadence of of 830 00:52:31,160 --> 00:52:34,480 a desire that you have to go do that goes down and down. 831 00:52:35,240 --> 00:52:38,880 Your subtle sensations increase and increase until eventually 832 00:52:38,880 --> 00:52:42,760 you reach the threshold where it just the pleasure you're having 833 00:52:43,160 --> 00:52:47,680 in not ejaculating far outweighs any of the pleasure you could 834 00:52:47,680 --> 00:52:50,760 have by looking at porn or having an ejaculation. 835 00:52:50,760 --> 00:52:56,560 So I just want to remind that to guys that it's, it's a process. 836 00:52:56,560 --> 00:52:59,640 It's not like a light switch and just because you, you get the, 837 00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,600 the idea of it or you, you hear the information doesn't always 838 00:53:03,600 --> 00:53:06,480 mean that the body can receive it quickly right away. 839 00:53:06,480 --> 00:53:09,680 So be gentle with yourself, take your time and if you need 840 00:53:09,680 --> 00:53:12,000 support in this journey, like we're here for you. 841 00:53:12,760 --> 00:53:14,840 Again, as we mentioned, we have a training coming up in 842 00:53:14,840 --> 00:53:18,160 December. Still a handful of spots, I 843 00:53:18,160 --> 00:53:20,240 think 5 or 6 spots left in that one. 844 00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:22,800 And yeah, we'd love to have you in it. 845 00:53:22,800 --> 00:53:26,120 So that's everything I've got with that. 846 00:53:26,120 --> 00:53:31,440 I'm I'm complete. Yeah, awesome brother. 847 00:53:31,520 --> 00:53:34,280 Well, pleasure as always to drop in with you. 848 00:53:34,280 --> 00:53:38,960 I love how we had some points that we were thinking we might 849 00:53:38,960 --> 00:53:44,480 dive into today and then just from your check in, we had more 850 00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:47,000 than enough threads to pull on and went in a completely 851 00:53:47,000 --> 00:53:51,200 different direction. So always fun going on these 852 00:53:51,200 --> 00:53:53,400 tangents with you. Appreciate anyone tuning in. 853 00:53:53,400 --> 00:53:55,160 Hope you received value from this. 854 00:53:55,160 --> 00:53:59,600 And as Ben was speaking to, if you'd like the support of 855 00:53:59,600 --> 00:54:03,440 brotherhood and the community of like minded men on a similar 856 00:54:03,440 --> 00:54:08,120 path oriented towards shared goals and intentions and a real 857 00:54:08,120 --> 00:54:12,120 strong framework to to guide you there and the implementation 858 00:54:12,120 --> 00:54:15,280 tools to ensure that you're doing what you set out to do, 859 00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:18,440 come hit us up. We would love to have you and 860 00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:22,920 wherever you're at and wherever you choose to go may be true and 861 00:54:22,920 --> 00:54:25,680 authentic to you. Move in a owerful way and have a 862 00:54:25,680 --> 00:54:26,320 blessed day.